


Devil's Drop

by lpfan503, Penelope_Ink



Category: Linkin Park
Genre: Alternate Universe, M/M, Mental Coercion, Secrets, Sexual Coercion, Slash
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-12
Updated: 2019-06-04
Packaged: 2019-06-09 12:28:52
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 43
Words: 420,755
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15267516
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lpfan503/pseuds/lpfan503, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Penelope_Ink/pseuds/Penelope_Ink
Summary: When Mike and Chester meet through a mutual friend, sparks fly between the nineteen year old piano teacher and twenty year old film producer. As their relationship heats up, a life of deception and manipulation unfolds in which Mike is unprepared to morally cope with his boyfriend's desensitization to the world around them. Bennoda. AU.





	1. Red + Blue = Purple

Mike tilted his head to the right, his nervous fingers tugging at his silver earring while Joe sat across from him, his eyes expectant. There was no getting out of this. Mike was going to have to give him some sort of answer. _But there is no way I’m stepping foot in a karate class. Just the thought is enough to make my stomach turn. Sweaty people everywhere, and all of them thinking I should know what I’m doing, sounds like a little slice of hell on an otherwise normal day. All I want is a simple cup of coffee and a bit of conversation after working all afternoon, not another one of Joe’s attempts to get me into his club._

“Come on, Mike, just give it a chance. Jesus,” Joe seethed, his head shaking. He tossed Mike his best annoyed look of disappointment before tipping back his latte. 

_Jesus? Yes, that’s exactly what I’m going to need if I’m going to make it through any sort of public exercise class._ “I… I don’t know, Joe. It’s like, the complete opposite of how I want to spend a Thursday evening.” Mike looked down, his gaze hitting his standard issue button-down flannel and jeans. A defeated sigh crept from his lips as he pointed at himself. “I’m not even dressed for something like that, and this class is in what, a half hour? I don’t even have time to change clothes. No way.” 

Joe pointed his latte toward Mike as he rolled his eyes. “I’ve been telling you forever now that you need to get out more. You’re turning into a hermit, Shinoda. Join with people a little.” Joe shook a meaty fist Mike’s way, his best jovial expression following it. 

Mike felt himself smile a little. _He’s probably right, even though it kind of pisses me off. I really just want to go home, trade these jeans for some sweatpants, and eat leftover Chinese takeout. Trying to get little kids to put their fingers in the right place on piano keys over and over again all afternoon is enough to make me want to eat ice cream right out of the container for the rest of the night. It’s the best way to eat away frazzled nerves._

“It’s just one class,” Joe said as he sat back. His wider frame looked a little funny in the tiny chair, but in the new aged coffee shop, everything seemed diminished. Minimalist, even. He smiled at his friend. “If I can do it, you can.” 

Mike almost snorted out his coffee. That comment had to be a joke. Joe had been a Black Belt since before Mike had met him a few years back. Joe was on the shorter side, but his Korean features and broad shoulders made him intimidating. _Even to me sometimes, and I’m his friend!_ Mike looked down at the cheesy ceramic top of the small round table where they were sitting, unsure of what to say.

“If you don’t like it, I’ll never bring it up again,” Joe said, his voice softening with sympathy. “I’ve been building my classes, Mike, and I’d love to see you come and check it out. Be a part of it. Be a part of something.” 

Mike looked up, his stare going sharp. “You’ll _never_ bring it up again?” 

Joe’s eyes sparkled as confidence that he was finally going to win this argument drifted his way. Flannel or not, he was going to get Mike Shinoda to at least come check out his karate club. He’d been after the piano teacher for months now, but with no progress. Now, however, victory felt close. “I promise on my grandmother’s good name,” he said, his right hand raised.

Mike weighed the only two options he had - he could go back to his tiny apartment and spend the evening trying to avoid conversation with his irritating roommate, or give in and go to karate. _Maybe I should just get it over with._

“And look at the bright side; you might not be dressed for class,” Joe added with a smirk as he looked Mike’s outfit up and down, “but it’s just right across the street. I’m not even asking you to fight the L.A. traffic to get there.” 

Traffic. That was the one thing Mike hated more than a room full of sweaty strangers, and Joe knew it. He knew that as long as Mike didn’t have to get into his crummy excuse for a car and drive anywhere, he could probably get Mike to agree to one karate class. 

The piano teacher drained the last of his coffee, and pushed his seat back before he stood up with a sigh. “Fine. But I’m only going to watch, don’t try to get me to do anything in these jeans. There’s a reason those karate clothes you wear are so… forgiving.” _I mean, I know my ass looks great in skinny jeans but they aren’t exactly conducive to kicking, or whatever it is you do in a karate class. I know I’m going to hate this but I’m tired of telling Joe no. Besides, it’s only an hour, and my Chinese food will still be there when this ordeal is over._

“You won’t regret it,” Joe said as he stood up and slid his chair in with a horrible scrape against the floor. “And don’t worry about your clothes. Everyone comes in street clothes for their first time. You’re going to see my best class. Great group of people,” he assured Mike, slapping his shoulder as they headed for the door. “I’ve really got some promising students this time around. You could be one of those, too,” he said as he wiggled his eyebrows hopefully. 

Mike tossed his cup in the trashcan and sighed a little heavier than necessary. A scowl sketched across his face as he glared at the back of Joe’s head and his black hair that was getting out of control, in Mike’s opinion. It was starting to get shaggy looking, thought Joe didn’t seem to mind. He was actually pulling it up in man buns now and again at this point. _Which I guess sorta suits his whole karate thing,_ Mike decided as he followed Joe out the door. _But doesn’t he know me at all? To think I’m going to end up being some sort of karate star is just ridiculous._

Swimming had always been Mike’s thing, from the time he started kindergarten, all the way through high school. There was something peaceful to him about gliding through the water in the early morning, alone with his thoughts. He had learned early on that being in the pool was just like playing piano - a place to retreat when life was too overwhelming. A quiet place. A place he could leave feeling whole again.

“I should warn you up front,” Joe said as they got to the corner where they stopped and waited for the light to change so they could cross, “that it’s going to be loud. But the yelling is important,” he added when he saw Mike’s wary look. “It’s all about breathing and putting your whole attention into what you’re doing. You gotta find your inner fire.” He reached over to shake Mike’s shoulder, but the piano teacher managed to sidestep him as the light turned. “And,” Joe continued as they walked along with a half a dozen other people, “karate is good to know. As least the basics. For self-defense. Not that you can’t take care of yourself,” he quickly added. 

“Yeah,” Mike said drily. “I run into a lot a situations teaching grade school kids to play piano where I need self-defense.”

“Alright, smartass, you know what I mean. I’ve actually got a guy - a friend - in this class you’re going to watch, that’s in it right now to brush up on his self-defense. He’s had some run-ins with some pushy guys.” That last part included a glance in Mike’s direction. 

It’s the first thing Joe had said about karate that caught Mike’s interest, and Mike knew he said it for exactly that reason. Joe had always been cool with Mike being gay, but Mike also knew that the karate instructor worried about him a lot. _He says I’m not very street smart, and maybe I’m not. Well, I know that I’m not._ Mike tended to meet guys that started off promising, nice guys who seemed interested in finding out about who he was as a person, and somehow ended up being total assholes. They had spent long hours trying to figure out what Mike was putting out there that drew the attention of those kind of guys, and Mike thought that Joe probably had a point. _What if one day I can’t get out of a bad situation just by saying ‘I don’t think we should see each other anymore’ and walking away? What kind of protection is swimming going to offer me?_

“So, this guy,” Mike said, glancing back Joe’s way, “has he had a lot of trouble?”

Joe shook his head. “Not sure, really. He just told me he’s had some guys wear out their welcome, and they’ve gotten a little physical with him. He’s a good guy. You two would probably get along. Share war stories and whatnot about asshole dates.” He flashed a grin - that Joe grin that begged Mike to punch him childishly in the arm. He loved to yank Mike’s chain. 

“Maybe. You know how I feel about new people. Especially karate enthusiasts with bad dating histories,” Mike added, trying to lighten the mood a bit. _There’s no sense in going into this whole thing with a bad attitude. I can do anything for an hour._

They finally reached the door to Joe’s rented space in the strip mall, and he opened the door for Mike to go in first. Right away the piano teacher was smacked by the muggy warmth of the gym and the sound of large, industrial type fans in the ceilings on full blast.They were standing behind a half-wall barricade by the front door and windows, which were plastered with the school’s logo and latest honorable win, and on the other side of the barricade was the class. The floor was one giant blue mat. Benches lined the outside, and belts and trophies hung on the walls. A large banner toward the front had the school’s latest tournament accomplishment on it. 

An impressed smile gave Mike away as he looked around; Joe really had built something special here. His attention fell on the benches next, where everyone had gathered. Bodies and large black duffel bags sprawled along the floor and seats while people adjusted their different colored belts and black uniforms. 

Joe leaned toward his friend. “See? Don’t you love this? Can’t you feel the energy already? And you’re not even on the floor yet!” 

Mike recognized the excitement on Joe’s face; it was the same bright enthusiasm that he felt when he worked on music with his students. Guilt set in immediately as he realized he’d been wallowing in his own social insecurities instead of trying to be a little open-minded. Instead of being happy for Joe. “Yeah, it’s energetic for sure,” Mike finally agreed. “Maybe you should have brought me to a beginner class, though. These guys all look like they know what they’re doing and they haven’t even started yet.” He felt his palms starting to sweat and wondered if Joe would keep his promise, allowing him to just watch and not participate. _Maybe this was a mistake after all. I should have gone home and dug out my sweatpants and called it a night._

Joe patted Mike on the shoulder. “Don’t worry, Mike. Everyone starts at zero. This is a good group. If you’re going to catch the fire, it will be from being around these guys.” He spread his arm out toward his students, who had started to line up in eight parallel lines of four to five people. They all had jump ropes in their hands. 

“Jump ropes?” Mike commented in bewilderment. “I thought this was all kicking and yelling.” The panic set in as Mike mentally tried to calculate how long it had been since he’d jumped rope. He knew it hadn’t happened since elementary school, and it was not in any way making him want to sign on for a class.

“We start every class with warming up,” Joe said as he pointed. “Jumping rope is a great way to get the heart going.” He pounded his fist against his chest, his eyes with the light of excitement in them. “Then they’ll run a few laps and do some sit ups and maybe jumping jacks. It depends on what the instructor is in the mood for. But jump roping is always first.” As soon as he stopped speaking, like it had been planned, music started to play from overhead. It was loud, and consuming as Mike watched the class start to jump rope. 

The piano teacher found himself tapping his foot to the beat of the music, scanning the lines in search of someone, anyone, who didn’t look coordinated. His heart sank a little as he looked up and down the rows at the class who had clearly been trained well, still feeling completely out of his element. As he continued along his path of self-pity, his eyes stopped on a class member in the far corner of the mat. 

It was apparent that he was confident in his abilities, since he was heading up one of the lines and effortlessly jumping his rope in time with the music. Mike couldn’t help but stare; the man’s heavily gelled, red-tipped mohawk didn’t sway a bit as he jumped with his eyes focused on some undefined spot in front of him. He was focused, determined, and before Mike could help himself, he decided, _fuck. That guy is hot._

“That’s Chester Bennington,” Joe said as he watched a small amount of drool form around Mike’s mouth. “He’s the one I was telling you about. I think you guys are about the same age.” He pointed to the man with the mohawk, who also had red and blue flame tattoos that coated his exposed wrists. They traveled almost halfway up his forearms, just enough to disappear under the mid-level sleeves of Chester’s black gi. 

Mike hadn’t realized he was staring and quickly looked back at Joe. “He’s the one? Damn. You could have warned me a bit. He’s… something else.” Even from across the room, Mike was impressed with what he could see. He’d always been a sucker for tattoos. Maybe that was how he’d always ended up with the wrong guy, falling for their taste in body art instead of their personality. 

Joe nodded. “Yup, that’s him. He’s a bit of a firecracker, but nice enough. I can introduce the two of you, if you’d like.” 

The nervous excitement that always crept up on Mike in situations such as these slammed into him full force. _What in the world would he see in someone like me? I’m so… average. And he’s so… wow. Is his lip pierced?_ He ran a hand nervously over his black hair, thinking about the blue tips his roommate had added just last week, and wondered if it looked good enough to meet someone like Chester. “Oh… okay,” Mike managed to get out. “Maybe after class. I mean, I am here to watch, maybe I’ll change my mind about signing up.” 

Joe shot Mike a grin. He really hadn’t expected his friend to take to Chester. The two were nothing alike, but if a little crush got Mike to rejoin the living world and learn some self-defense in the process, then why not? “Okay,” he said, keeping his thoughts to himself. “We can go sit down.” He pointed toward the benches, and just as the music stopped, they sat down side by side. 

A moment later, it was like someone had opened the floodgates as every single student turned around and rushed back toward the benches, tossing their jump ropes into their bags and grabbing bottles of water. They were all panting and sweaty, and that’s when Mike noticed that Chester’s duffel bag was only a few feet away from him. 

Chester was quick on his feet, Mike noticed as he tried to be sly about watching, hoping this sudden interest of his wouldn’t notice what he was doing. It was ridiculous how attractive Chester looked with his head leaned back, chugging a bottle of water. Mike’s eyes slid up the man’s pale neck and flicked to his ears, landing on a set of black plugs decorated with tiny white skulls and crossbones. And he had been right; as Chester capped his water bottle and tossed it back in the bag, Mike could clearly see that his bottom lip was pierced. Everything about Chester was undeniably sexy, and Mike wondered what he would even say when Joe introduced them.

The air in the gym was hot as Chester placed his hands on his slender hips, taking in a few deep breaths. His eyes scanned the boring cream colored cinder block walls - walls he’d stared at a million times - but then something caught his attention. He glanced over just in time to see someone new. A guy with spiky black hair. _No, that’s not black. It’s...kind of blue. Who the hell has blue hair? Well, I would. But that’s me. But this guy? I think he’s checking me out._ Chester had to repress his smile as he twisted slightly, and lifted the ends of his gi to show off his firm ass in the stranger’s direction. He even bent forward a little, just because. He had to smirk to himself for a second before he spun all the way around and then he trotted back to his place on the mat as everyone returned to their places. 

Mike felt the blood rush to his cheeks as he realized he’d been made. _He saw me staring at him. Oh, God. I should just leave now._ He fidgeted uncomfortably next to Joe and tried to look around at the other students, but his eyes kept coming back to settle on Chester. 

The instructor at the front of the class blew a whistle, and now everyone was running. They paced around the mat in a single file line. Chester was all about the slow jog. It was perfect for working up a sweat without killing yourself. He rounded the corner, his eyes landing on the guy from before. _I don’t know. He’s kinda cute. In that I’ve-never-been-in-a-karate-class kind of way. He’s sitting with Joe. Wonder if he knows him? Oh well. I’ll get him for staring at me._ A second later Chester was just about to pass where Mike was sitting, and that’s when he flicked his tongue out, rolling it over his lip ring before he flashed Mike a smile. 

That was all it took for Mike’s heart to furiously pound in his ears. _Oh. My. God. That has to be the sexiest fucking thing I’ve ever seen._ Mike took a deep breath and looked down at his clothes, suddenly wishing he had something more interesting on than a black and red flannel and old ripped jeans. How could he ever get a guy like that looking like a lumberjack? _He’s just messing with me. He saw me staring. There’s no way he’s interested. Could he be interested?_ Mike slid his fingers down the front of his shirt and bit his lip anxiously. 

A few corners later, and Chester was back to Joe and this guy that was still staring at him. _Who the hell wears a flannel shirt to a karate class? How do you even do that? He must be weird. Or maybe he’s not even here for the class. But he keeps checking me out. Look at those shoes. . .this guy needs help._

Chester picked up his pace, and passed the girl in front of him, just in time to send a wave Mike’s way. He wiggled his fingers and cocked his eyebrow before he looked away, and went back to keeping up with the rest of the class. Weird cute guys with blue hair and flannel shirts would have to wait, because laps were just about over, and now it was time to kill it with sit ups. 

Despite the very deliberate wave in his direction, Mike was still having a hard time believing the interest was real. Swallowing hard, he watched as Chester dropped down to the mat, getting ready for sit ups. The sleeves of his gi slid back all the way to his elbows as he put his hands behind his head, and Mike craned his neck to get a better view. He could tell there was something else tattooed on the elbow he could see from his vantage point, but he was too far away to make out what it was. Whatever it was, Mike wanted to see it up close. Mike wanted to see a lot of Chester up close. 

“See how you are?” Joe said suddenly, pulling Mike’s gaze back his way. “I bring you here to learn self-defense and what do you do? You get Chester to wave and smile at you.” He rolled his eyes jokingly. “He’s a bit of flirt, Mike, so don’t read too much into any of that. I’ll be right back,” he announced as he stood up. “Feel free to get in line after they’re done with sit ups. And don’t worry, no one will laugh.” He offered his friend a sheepish smile before he headed for the office on the far side of the gym. He’d introduce Mike to Chester later, but right now he needed to get a bit of paperwork done. With Mike watching Chester like he was the last man on earth, Joe was pretty sure he wasn’t going anywhere until class was over. 

_Get in line? I’ll have to take my shoes off. No shoes on the mat. I don’t even think I have matching socks on._ Of all of the possible problems going out and joining the class could bring, suddenly Mike was the most worried about his socks. He hadn’t done laundry in two weeks, and socks were always low on the priority list, since they were always hidden by his shoes. Mike looked at the candy apple red socks Chester had on, and toed off his shoes, dismayed to see that he had on socks that matched… but one had a hole in it. There was no way to hide that. There was no way he was going out on the mat, even if Chester himself came over and asked.

Sit ups were done, and now it was time for another drink and some breathing. Chester hurried back to the benches, his heart pounding and his body already coated with a thin layer of sweat. He glanced over at the new guy, noticing right away that Joe was gone. He took a long chug of water before he wiped his mouth with the back of his hand, his mouth hanging open as he breathed. “Hey,” he said, nodding in the stranger’s direction. He took a step closer. “Are you a friend of Joe’s?” 

“Um, yeah.” Mike glanced down at his feet again and tucked his foot up under the bench. “I’m Mike.”

“I’m Chester Bennington,” Chester said as he took another step to close the gap separating them. “I like your earrings,” he stated as his fingers picked at his own plugs. “Hoops, I don’t think I could really pull those off. I like the thicker stuff. It’s sexier. On me, anyway,” he chuckled with a bright smile, his brown eyes shining. “But the hoops work for you.” He stuck his tongue out a little, barely brushing his lip ring before he sat his water bottle down. “Gotta get back at it. You comin’ or what?” 

In the space of a breath, Mike forgot about his sock with the hole in the toe. The hottest guy in the room just invited him out on the mat, and it didn’t matter that Mike wasn’t interested in karate. It didn’t matter that he was dressed for a mountain hike, or that his face was flushed pink with the embarrassment he always felt when talking to someone new. The only thing that mattered was that Chester Bennington was smiling at him, showing a row of almost perfectly straight teeth, asking him to follow his lead.

“Yeah, okay. I mean, I don’t have the first idea what I’m doing here, I was just supposed to be watching, so I don’t know how good I’ll be.” _God, Mike, shut up,_ he commanded himself, standing up to find he was about the same height as Chester. He bit down on his lip to silence his rambling and looked out at the mat.

“No worries,” Chester dismissed immediately before he trotted off. He glanced over his shoulder, and something flipped in his stomach when he saw Mike following behind him. _Ha. Got him to follow me and I didn’t even try. This guy. He’s not going to be able to do anything in those clothes. God, he’s got some guts for trying though. Or he just wants some more opportunity to look at my ass. Eh, either way I’m good._ “Here,” he said, waving Mike over to the side, away from the other students. “We’ll hang out over here so we can go slower. I’ll show you some stuff.” 

“I don’t even know where to start,” Mike admitted, his cheeks feeling painfully red. He glanced up front at the instructor and then back at Chester, looking at him through lowered lashes. 

“Karate lesson number one,” Chester said, one finger raised, “don’t wear flannel shirts to class.” He chuckled as he pressed his one finger to Mike’s shirt front. “Rule number two,” he said, his voice dragging out a little slower, his finger still pressed to the soft fabric of Mike’s attire, “don’t worry about keeping up with everyone. You go at your own pace. You be you.” 

Mike looked helplessly around him as the class began a series of long stretches. He could only bend so far in his skinny jeans, and he wasn’t too keen on having his ass in Chester’s face in the first five minutes after they met. 

Chester crossed his arms, his eyebrow raising as he snuck a peek at Mike’s jean-clad ass. _Nice. I could tag that._ He quickly cleared his throat as he looked away and remembered where he was was. “Okay,” he said, as if clearing the air and his mind of Mike’s round bottom. “Remember to take everything in.” He stepped up to stand next to his new companion. He held his hands - palms together - in front of his chest and slowly rose his arms. “In slow, out slow.” He repeated the steps twice before he glanced over to see if Mike was getting it. 

_As long as he doesn’t ask me to touch my shoulders, I’m fine,_ Mike told himself, trying to copy Chester’s movements as much as he could. The flannel shirt didn’t have a lot of give in it, making him look even more inflexible than he actually was. He bit down on his lip again, a nervous habit he’d tried hard to break but just couldn’t shake. 

“Are you nervous?” Chester asked, his eyes ghosting over Mike’s face and landing on the man’s lips. “Or just in love with your own mouth? I could see how that could happen.” For a moment, Chester stopped. He knew every word he’d just said was stupid, but he couldn’t take it back now. And besides, Mike wasn’t laughing. He wasn’t making fun or calling him an idiot. This guy. This guy with the blue tinted hair and a scruffy goatee, that actually came to karate class dressed like he was on his way to log rolling contest, was interested. He was looking at Chester with wide pitch black eyes and his full attention, despite the silly comment about his mouth. 

As Mike smiled, the lip being held captive by his teeth slowly popped free, and he almost giggled. Chester thought his mouth was cute. In an instant Mike was wondering what it would be like to ditch the class and do something completely unlike his normal, antisocial self. He wanted Chester to ask him out more than he’d wanted to be asked out by any guy, ever. 

“So, Mike,” Chester said, trying to redeem himself from his dorky comment a moment ago, “are you seeing anyone?” He looked over, catching Mike in a mid kind-of downward stretch, his legs so hindered by his tight jeans that Chester actually had to cover his mouth to stop the laugh that was ready to burst from him. 

Mike froze, looking at Chester, at his gorgeous brown eyes that were twinkling with suppressed laughter, and his stomach took a turn. _He better not be fucking with me. Oh, this floor would have to open me up and swallow me right here if he’s just fucking with me._ Mike teetered on the edge of hope for what felt like a full minute, wondering if he should tell the truth or lie, just in case Chester was making fun of him, but something in the other man’s expression told him he was being real, and Mike took the plunge. “Ah… no. Are you?” Immediately Mike kicked himself for asking such a stupid question. 

Chester rolled his lips together in thought for a second before he scooted behind Mike. “You know, your form is terrible,” he said, leaning close as Mike straightened up. Chester let his hands touch Mike’s hips - lightly - before he added, “let me help.” He maneuvered Mike into a better stance, feeling the other man shiver a little under his touch, and Chester smiled to himself. “You know, if we put our heads together, we’d make purple.”

The air went out of the room as Mike slightly turned his head, trying to catch a glimpse of Chester’s face, but he wasn’t even sure what to say in reply to such a comment. 

“And I’m not seeing anyone,” Chester added, keeping his fingers ghosted over Mike’s sides now. “Breathe,” he instructed, gently. “And that’s it. We’re done.” He stepped away, giving Mike his space back as he waited to see what kind of reaction he’d get. It was his basic test. If he could give a compliment, toss in a cheesy pickup line, and get a little bit of body contact going, and the other person was into it, then maybe there was a chance for a little fun. 

Time stood still when Chester touched him, and Mike wasn’t even aware he’d forgotten to breathe until he heard Chester’s voice in his ear. He could feel the heat radiating off Chester’s warmed up body, and Mike’s heart was beating so hard he was sure Chester could hear it as close as they were. He wanted to press back into Chester’s hands but stopped himself, his typical uncertainty holding him back, and he shuddered when moments later, Chester dropped his hands and moved away. So Chester wasn’t seeing anyone. Did that mean he wanted to see Mike again? As he struggled to control his heart and his breathing, Mike turned around and met Chester’s eyes. 

Just then, Joe stepped out of his office. He glanced at his watch, and then across the gym. He gasped low and quick at the sight of Mike not sitting there waiting on him. _Damn. He did leave. I’ll never get him back in here now._ He headed toward the back of the room, his eyes slipping over his students as the instructor had them practicing punches now, but then he stopped. Mike was still here. He was off away from the rest of the class, with Chester standing next to him. The two men weren’t even following along with everyone else as they stared at one another. 

_Guess I’m a little late on introducing them_ , Joe thought as he hurried to meet them where they were. “Hey, you two,” he said, raising his hand as he neared them. “I was going to do a formal introduction, but it looks like you guys found each other anyway.” He stepped up close, his attention bouncing from one to the other. “Surely you already know this, but Mike, this is Chester, and Chester,” he said, a goofy chuckle following his words as he slapped Mike on the shoulder, “this is Mike Shinoda. He really doesn’t want to be here, but he promised he’d come check out the class anyway.” 

“We met,” Mike said, just as Chester asked, “Shinoda? You didn’t tell me your last name.”

Mike smiled, his tongue poking through his teeth a bit as he stuck out his hand. “Let me introduce myself properly. Mike Shinoda,” he said, feeling a little more confident with Joe at his side. “Sorry I left out half my name before. I might have been a little distracted.” 

“Distracted is good,” Chester said immediately. He looked Joe’s way, but it was clear he wasn’t going to get much more information out of this conversation. “Well, I’m going to finish class.” He nodded toward everyone else, their gut wrenching screams in unison making the hairs on Chester’s arms stand up. He loved it. He loved moving as a group and being part of something bigger. He loved learning how to kick someone in all the right places if situations got out of control, and how to use his voice as a defense. He could scream with the best of them, and as he gave Mike Shinoda one final once over, he was pretty sure he could get him to scream, too. “Mike,” he said, before he rejoined the group, “if you’re interested,” he said, flashing Joe a quick look to get reassurance, and he got it in the form of a nod before he went on, “if you feel like going out sometime, I’m usually free during the week.” He shrugged his shoulders, making sure to add in as much nonchalant appeal as possible. “If you want to, anyway. Or not, that’s cool. But, I gotta go kick some invisible ass, so I’ll see you around.” 

With that, Chester was gone, leaving Mike and Joe in the back of the room. Mike couldn’t help but follow him with his eyes, feeling simultaneously disappointed and excited. Chester was interested, but not interested enough to get his number just then. Or maybe that was all part of the game. He was worrying his bottom lip with his teeth again, wondering if Chester had any intention of asking him for his number before Joe came out and made him reintroduce himself like an idiot. What was done was done, and now they were going to enter into that awkward dance, waiting to see who made the first move. _Or did Chester just make the first move? That wasn’t really asking me out, was it? Should I tell Joe to give him my number?_

“Told you he was nice,” Joe said, crossing his arms as he watched his students kick in unison, Chester included. “I don’t really like to get involved, you know that.” He looked Mike’s way, and saw the look of recognition. “But if you want, I can pass your number along to him. He’s pretty easy going, so if it’s weird,” he offered with a shrug, “he won’t be offended or anything if you’re not interested.” 

With a deep breath, Mike looked at the back of Chester’s head, and thought about how it felt to have Chester in his space minutes ago. He wanted more. “Okay,” he answered decisively, “I think I’d like that.”


	2. Shirt Issues

Chester pounded his fingers against the steering wheel to the beat blasting through the car stereo. Driving was one of his favorite things, especially in his new AMG sports car. He loved the noise it made, the growls and howls of the engine - especially out on the long stretches of highway. And, yeah, it was flashy, and yeah, it was expensive, but he’d been working his ass off for the last two years, and he figured he deserved something out of it other than paying bills.

_I bleed it out, digging deeper just to throw it away_   
_I bleed it out digging deeper just to throw it away_

_I bleed it out, go, stop the show_   
_Choppy words and a sloppy flow_   
_Shotgun opera, lock and load_   
_Cock it back and then watch it go_

“Yeah, baby!” he hollered as the song went on without him. It was early evening, and as he glanced at the car’s clock, he had to smirk. _Right on time._ He looked to his GPS panel - he had three more minutes before he’d reach his destination. 

Chester glanced at himself in the rearview mirror, catching sight of his brown eyes and the small amount of eyeliner he’d put on while he was getting dressed earlier. He quickly licked his middle finger, and swiped it across both his eyebrows - fuckin’ perfect. 

“Oh, Mr. Shinoda, you don’t know what you’re dealing with.” He had to chuckle as he flashed himself a smile in the mirror next, his lip ring pressing against his bottom lip. “Dinner first, then we can go back to my place. Or his place,” he decided with an _I don’t care_ shrug. “I’m driving, so probably his place.”

A few turns later and a voice command or two from his GPS and Chester pulled into Mike’s apartment complex. A half a dozen apartment buildings - all of them looking like they needed a new paint job - lined either side of the parking lot. Chester’s face was already a little askew. “What a crappy place,” he muttered as he searched for the right apartment number. “It’s a good thing he’s cute. No, I shouldn’t say that,” he corrected himself as he pulled into an empty parking spot. “Listen to me, being all high and mighty. Jesus, I’m a dick.” 

And that was it. At that moment he decided to drop his judgements and instead get ready to lay on his charm for his date for the night. Besides, he hadn’t had much money growing up. It had only been within the last few years that he had really started to bring in the cash, and it was easy to forget that sometimes, but usually not for long. 

He turned the car off as he sat for a moment, his arms wrapped around the steering wheel as he looked at Mike’s apartment. The yellow siding was hideous and for some reason the small porch connected to Mike’s unit had books stacked up and different colored fake plants sitting around. _Okay, maybe I don’t know what I’ve gotten myself into._

He took a deep breath, opened the door and stepped out. He checked his watch - right on time. He spun back towards his car, checking his reflection one last time in the driver’s side window. He swiped a hand over his red-tipped mohawk, making sure each point was standing up. He straightened out the front of his short-sleeved, white button-down dress shirt that had a bright green breast pocket and a matching green collar. He spun around, trying to see a good visual of his ass, and how it looked in these dark pants. He brushed both legs off as he took one last look - his bright green and black SKECHERS were clean and laced, and even though he couldn’t see them, he knew his socks with the alien heads on them were hiding underneath. _And my underwear. Can’t go wrong with alien underwear. Mike will think they’re sexy. He seems like an alien kinda guy._

Satisfied, Chester clicked the alarm button on his keys and headed for apartment 7-A. _I can’t wait to see what he’s wearing. Anything’s better than that trainwreck of an outfit he had on at karate the other day. Maybe I should have specified that we’re not going camping on this date. . .no, he’d never wear a flannel shirt on a date. That would be silly._

He bounced up onto the small porch, and without a second hesitation, he rang the bell. 

From his seat at the cramped kitchen table, Mike’s head shot up the second he heard the door chime. The sound made his heart race in anticipation. He hadn’t seen Chester since the night at the karate club. There had been back and forth texting, which he was way better at in the beginning of a relationship than he was talking. Now he had to try to string words together in Chester’s presence and sound halfway intelligent while doing it. As he stood up to answer the door, he bumped his elbow into the laminate bar that separated the cooking and dining space and winced. He was still rubbing the spot with a frown on his face when he opened the door.

The frown and annoyance from the sore elbow immediately dissolved into a look of surprise. _I should have known, after all the hell he gave me about my flannel. I should have worn something else._ Mike’s mind cast around frantically for what else he could have worn before he realized he hadn’t said anything yet. Chester’s color coordinated outfit had left him speechless, and he blinked a few times before he managed to get out, “hi.” That was it. That was all his mouth could produce as his eyes traveled down the front of Chester’s shirt, all the way to his shoes, and then back up again. 

Chester checked his watch before he eyed his date and the dreary flannel shirt and plain old jeans he had on. “You’re not ready yet?” he asked, hoping that maybe Mike had just fallen behind schedule. 

Mike felt his ears turn pink with the embarrassment that spread over his face. “I… well…” Mike cleared his throat nervously as he picked at the button on the cuff of his gray and black checkered flannel. “No, I’m ready to go,” he finished, trying to subtly wipe his palms on his black jeans. 

“Okay,” Chester said, the word dragging out a little slow. “But. . .” he wasn’t sure what to say next. He had already imagined what Mike would be wearing - something smooth and classic. Something blue. Something worthy of a nice meal out. Something other than a flannel and jeans that had frayed edges on the bottom. “Mike,” he said, his brain switching tactics. “Not that I don’t dig the campground look you got goin’ on here or anything, but maybe this isn’t the right choice for dinner.” He reached, his fingers toying with one of Mike’s buttons. “What else you got? I mean, if you don’t mind. I can help you coordinate a little better.” 

Without waiting for an invitation, Chester slid inside the apartment and stopped immediately, confronted with more books. He looked warily at Mike. “Do you run a library out of here on the side or something?”

Mike looked around at the books he’d become accustomed to over the months he’d lived with Anna. The stacks really weren’t her fault, if he wanted to be gracious about it. It was just that the apartment was small, the bedrooms tinier, and there just wasn’t enough space for bookcases. He admitted the situation was out of control but it didn’t matter. He didn’t have people over that often.

“Those all belong to my roommate,” Mike explained, waving a hand in the direction of Chester’s gaze. “She’s kind of a bookworm. But don’t worry about it,” he added as Chester looked at him in surprise, “she’s not here right now.” He shut the door behind Chester and turned back into the small living space. “Um… so this is my place, I guess. My room’s down the hall.” He pointed to the right. “Just give me a second, I’ll go see what I’ve got.” _Damn, I can’t believe he’s asking me to change. Who does that?_ “Wait here,” he instructed.

“You sure?” Chester asked, as Mike turned to leave. “I can help.” He took a step forward to follow, before he misstepped over a stray book on the floor and _wham!_ Down he went, a curse flying from his lips as his knee hit the sad excuse for a coffee table Mike and Anna had made from cinder blocks and wood. It was very ghetto, and Chester was already hating this small apartment as he rubbed his knee and regained his composure. 

“Oh, shit? Are you okay?” Mike asked. _This is starting off in the worst possible way._

“I’m fine,” Chester said, the ache in his knee slowly leaving. “Just, go put on something so we can go.” He brushed himself off, making sure his outfit was still intact from the fall. _He better be worth all this. Who makes a coffee table out cinder blocks? Unless you’re some weird French designer or some shit. Which he’s not._

Mike just nodded as his teeth worried his bottom lip, and he turned to take the few steps down the hallway to his room. As he opened the door to the only book-free square feet of old parquet flooring left in the apartment, his eyes landed on the gray hoodie thrown across the bed, a hoodie he’d had on earlier in the afternoon. _I mean, I changed out of my hoodie. I thought this was a nice shirt. I don’t think I have anything that is going to meet Chester’s standards. I knew this guy was out of my league._

An apartment this small didn’t have much closet space, not that it mattered. Mike stood in front of his closet and surveyed his wardrobe. He was certain Chester would turn around and walk out without so much as a goodbye if he ever saw the contents. It was hanger after hanger of button down flannel shirts, in various stripes, plaids, and checks, all comfortable and low maintenance. He knew if he looked at his top shelf all he’d find was more hoodies, neatly folded and sorted by color. There wasn’t anything to change into, and Mike stood there, staring into his closet, at a complete loss. 

“Mike!” Chester shouted from the living room, where he was looking out the front window at his car, making sure no one was creeping around it. “We need to go! My stomach is saying it’s time! Anything other than a flannel, man. Anything!” He glanced over his shoulder toward the hallway where he’d seen Mike disappear, the urge to go find him kicking in as he turned all the way around and headed that way, dodging around books and purses and hair brushes. _This roommate of his is a total slob. Unless all these purses belong to Mike. No. He’s not a purse guy. I don’t think, anyway._

With no decision to make, and afraid that Chester would come barging in at any moment, Mike gave up and went back out into the hallway. Chester was right in front of him as he closed the door to his room. “Let’s just go, if you’re that hungry,” Mike said, trying to avoid eye contact. 

Chester’s impulse was to say no. To take Mike into the bedroom he seemed to be guarding, and find something else for this man to wear. But as he stood there in the dimly lit hallway, watching as Mike fidgeted with his fingers and looked so unsure, something else washed over Chester. Above everything else, Mike Shinoda was cute with a sexy sort of innocence to him. He had big brown eyes that were looking so embarrassed and long fingers that Chester could imagine would be of good use in the bedroom. Their text conversations over the last few days had been enjoyable - easy going and almost fun. So he was here now, and flannel or not, he was going to take this man to dinner, just like they’d planned. 

“You know, it’s fine,” Chester said, slipping a smile across his lips. “I’m the jerk for saying anything. It’s, ah, one of my quirks. I got a thing for clothes. If I ever push it too much, just say so.” _Or maybe he needs help shopping? Hmmmm. . .there are some shops on the way to the restaurant. We could stop there first. Would that be weird? Can I take this guy shopping on our first date?_

Mike felt relief wash over his body as he realized Chester wasn’t so turned off by his lack of fashion sense that he didn’t want to go to dinner. He’d been looking forward to this for days, and it would have been awful trying to explain to Anna later why he was sitting at home on the couch eating ice cream instead of out with Chester. “Great,” he breathed with a half smile, waiting for Chester to turn back to the door so they could move past the incident and get to Skylight Gardens; He was hungry, too.

“Alright, well, let’s go then,” Chester said, and before he could get an acknowledgement from Mike, he was down the hall and back out to the living room. He had his keys out, as he opened the front door and stepped out into the warmer air. He sucked it in, glad to be out of Mike’s cramped apartment. “So this is me,” he said, pointing toward his candy apple red sports car. “I haven’t had it that long, but I love it.” He clicked the button on his keys, making the alarm on the car _beep_ as it disengaged. 

“This? This is your car?” Mike asked incredulously. “Damn, it’s awesome!” He glanced at Chester and then back at the car. “What do you do?” he asked before he could stop himself. Chester was certainly out of his league, and Mike wondered if he’d ever see Chester again after this date, after he’d been inside Mike’s small place and analyzed Mike’s wardrobe. Despite the playful, flirtatious texting and what Mike was hoping was a shared attraction to each other, he couldn’t help but feel totally different from the man who was now holding his passenger side door open and looking at Mike with a grin. 

“Uh, well, I’m in the video business. I work for a small production house. It pays pretty well,” Chester said, even as his heartbeat picked up a little at his answer. He looked away from Mike for a second and across the parking lot, his mouth feeling dry. “I’m lucky,” he added as he caught sight of Mike getting in and sitting down. “Before this job, I was still living with my mom and delivering pizzas.” He shut the door, ending the conversation, he hoped. He trotted to get back around to the driver’s side. He slid in next to Mike, and as he buckled his seatbelt he said, “Hang on.” 

Mike was running his hands over the buttery ivory leather of his seat and looking at all of the fancy computer components of Chester’s dash. Owning a car like this seemed so far in the future it almost felt unattainable; it made him embarrassed of his little blue Honda Civic that had seen better days, despite how proud he’d been to buy that car all on his own. Hoping Chester didn’t ask what he drove, Mike kept silent and glanced at his hands on the steering wheel. There was a tiny tattoo on his pinky finger that Mike had failed to notice on their first meeting. 

“So,” Chester said, stealing glances Mike’s way. “You said you do something with music?” 

It was easy to talk about music, and Mike’s expression brightened. “Yeah! I teach piano lessons down at Red Pelican Music. Mostly grade school kids, since I don’t have a degree or anything… yet… but I’m thinking about doing that. Getting my degree, that is. I love teaching.” 

Chester smiled. It was the most he’d heard Mike Shinoda say since he’d met him. “That’s cool. Joe said we’re about the same age. Almost. I think I got a few months on you.” He flashed his date a playful look, wiggling his eyebrows. “I don’t think I could ever go to college. Too much reading and I’ve got energy problems. Can’t sit still.” 

Mike sighed pensively. “College is so expensive. I don’t mind the work, and music is so… different. There’s so many hours you spend, holed up in a practice room alone, playing… it’s not so much book work. I don’t think I’m good enough to be a performer… even though I love to play myself.” Even as he spoke, he was unconsciously moving his fingers in patterns against his jeans. 

“I don’t know, sounds kind of lonely. That whole _holed up in a practice room alone_ thing. I like people. If I’m alone too much I. . .” Chester stopped, his lips curling together as he thought better of what he was just about to reveal to someone he really didn’t know. He cleared his throat instead and said, “Anyway, good luck with that. I’m sure you play great. And if you really want to perform, then you should go for it. Live it, right? Don’t dream it.” 

_You have to be sure you know what your dream is to do that,_ Mike thought as they lapsed back into a comfortable silence. He was just starting to feel a bit relaxed, less nervous, when Chester made an unexpected turn. “Where are we going?” Mike asked, looking out at the strip of businesses in front of them. This wasn’t the date location they had agreed upon. 

Chester looked over, Mike’s tinted blue hair catching his attention, and something mischievous streaked across his mind. “I’m kidnapping you, Mike. I’ve got you now. You’re about to be my sex slave. I’ve got a pair of fuzzy cuffs with your name on them,” he said, struggling to keep his tone serious and under control, even as he wanted to laugh. 

The long fingers that had been playing scales on Mike’s jeans stilled suddenly, gripping the fabric as he looked at Chester. “I… um… what?” 

Chester was ready. He was ready to lay on another layer, to drop his voice down another octave. He was going to reach over and pet Mike on the leg and say something sexy about whips and chains. But as he looked over, his tongue at the ready, the look on Mike’s face made him bust into laughter instead. “Look at your face!” he cackled. “Holy crap, I’m just messing with you!”

It only took a second for Mike to recover, though he couldn’t control the blush he felt creeping up his cheeks again. “Yeah! I know! I, well, _you_... you don’t seem like that kind of guy.” 

Chester’s amused expression faded as he pulled his laughter in. He reached over, his hand sliding up Mike’s leg, from his knee to his thigh as he said, “Oh, if only you knew.” He gave Mike a little squeeze, before he put both hands back on the wheel. “We’re here.” 

Mike could still feel the warmth of Chester’s touch even after he’d put his hand back on the wheel. The way his hand felt, that barely there squeeze, caused a little twist of excitement in Mike’s stomach. _He is so fucking hot. I really, really have to not screw this up._ “Where is here?” he asked, trying to take a deep, calming breath without Chester noticing, scanning the store fronts for a clue. 

“This is one of my favorite places to shop,” Chester said as he twisted in his seat, looking out the back window as he parallel parked the car in front of strip of local stores. “The Mohawk General Store,” Chester said as he pointed out Mike’s window. “And I don’t just come here because I have a mohawk,” he made sure to add, gesturing to his head. “I thought, ah, maybe we’d check some stuff out before dinner. No offense or anything, I mean, I can feel you up under these clothes as well as anything.” He reached over again, this time letting his fingers feel the fabric of Mike’s flannel, and for a half a second he was shocked that it was soft. _Wow. Go figure. I could see this as, like, pajamas. I’d have to get matching bottoms though._ “Anyway,” he said, pulling his hand away quickly, “if you’re totally against it or pissed at me right now for being a freak, we can just go eat. Your choice.” 

Chester’s touch had sent thousands of butterflies to party in Mike’s stomach, and all Mike wanted was more of that feeling. If a new shirt was going to make Chester touch him more, he was all in. “Well, okay,” he said, a little breathlessly. “I guess we can go look around.” 

“Sweet!” Chester cheered as he reached over and nudged Mike on the shoulder. “Come on, you’ll love it!” Chester was out of the car and around the other side before Mike could even comprehend that he’d left. His passenger side door opened, and there was Chester’s hand. “Come on.” 

The excitement was contagious and Mike slipped his hand into Chester’s, allowing himself to be pulled along. It was a minimalist sort of establishment, with simple single racks of men’s clothing on both sides, organized by color, and Mike smiled. He organized his hoodies by color. Maybe this wouldn’t be so bad. 

“Now,” Chester said, Mike’s hand still in his own as he lead the way through the store. “Let’s see what suits you.” He maneuvered around the space knowingly, even waving to one of the clerks, before they stopped in front of one of the racks. He let go of Mike’s hand to press his own together - palm to palm - as he stared at a selection of nice dress shirts. “I think you would look good in something like this.” He plucked a collared shirt from its perch, and held it up. It had a swirled pattern on the left side and a hint of blue and silver running through the stitching. Chester looked up, meeting Mike’s darker than black eyes - eyes he was growing to like looking at. They weren’t just pretty, they were deep. Like there was something more than a sexy nineteen year old living behind them. They were the opposite of shallow, and that was more than appealing. “What do you think?” 

Mike reached for the shirt, catching the sleeve in his fingers and running them down to the tag, where he tried to casually flip it over to check the price. It was more cash than he had on him at the moment, and he wasn’t sure how close he was to the limit on his credit card. Nothing would be more embarrassing than having his card denied on his first date with a guy who apparently had plenty of money to spare. He bit his lip as he considered what to say. 

Chester waited. He had figured Mike would jump on the shirt. It was fuckin’ gorgous, after all. But the longer he waited, the longer he watched Mike’s excited expression drop to something more like worry, he remembered that maybe it wasn’t the style of shirt that was throwing a monkey wrench in his date’s fun. “Hey, if you like it, let me buy it. I mean, you know,” Chester said, shrugging the gesture off as nothing, “I dragged you in here and I know this wasn’t what we agreed on.” 

The shirt _was_ nice, and Mike absently wondered if the blue in the shirt might make the tint Anna had put in his hair look less ridiculous. _Maybe I shouldn’t let this guy spend money on me. What if it doesn’t work out?_ He shifted on his feet and looked at Chester, his eyes gliding over the lip ring, and Mike realized he really, really wanted this to work out. _I should at least try this shirt on. No sense in buying something this expensive and then it not fitting._ “Well, first I guess we should see if it even looks good on me.” Mike looked around to find a fitting room as he took the shirt from Chester.

“I have an eye for this stuff, Mike,” Chester said as he pointed toward the dressing rooms. They walked side by side through the store, scooting around free standing merchandise tables and an oddly placed rack of shoes before they got to the set of three doors. “The thing about me, Mike, is that I get fixated on stuff. It’s like your shirt,” he said, gesturing to Mike’s flannel. “My mind tends to go nuts on shit like this unless I do something about it. Please don’t take this personal, like, at all. I didn’t plan any of this, I swear.” He made a crossing motion across his heart before he flipped Mike a little grin, letting the small crinkles show around his eyes. Crinkles that would go much deeper as he got older, but for now they were just the shadows of what would come. 

“It’s fine,” Mike assured him, even though he felt the opposite of fine. His nerves were getting the best of him even as he tried to take Chester seriously, tried to believe that this gorgeous guy wasn’t totally offended by his obvious lack of fashion sense. He stepped toward the middle door that was wide open and made to shut the door behind him so he could try on the shirt Chester had chosen just for him. 

Chester followed. He really hadn’t thought about it, it was more of a gut reaction, and as he saw Mike disappearing behind the door, he bolted forward. “I’ll join you,” he said, slipping into the rather small space, closing the door behind him. “Wow, it’s a lot tighter in here with two people.” He fussed with his own arms, and shuffled his feet as he tried to side step this way and that. Mike mimicked his movements until they’d done a full circle around each other. 

“You’re going to have to step back,” Mike said, looking at Chester with an eyebrow quirked. “I hardly have room to raise my arms in here.” He shoved the shirt into Chester’s hands and started to unbutton his flannel, his fingers portraying his nervousness at Chester’s proximity by shaking. He was looking anywhere but at Chester as he unbuttoned his cuffs and slipped the flannel off his shoulders. 

Chester had the shirt. He had it clutched to his chest as he watched. He was ready. He could already feel that familiar tingle of anticipation as he watched Mike’s fingers undo one button at a time. _Come on. . .come on. . ._ He had already imagined what Mike Shinoda would look like naked, and even though he knew this wouldn’t be that, a sneak peek of what tonight’s later activities would hold was very welcomed. Chester’s lips were already parted, his tongue flipping his lip ring side to side and then. . . “What the hell is that?” he asked, nodding toward the white undergarment that was in full view now that the flannel was gone. 

“What?” Mike asked, reaching for the new shirt and holding his flannel out for Chester to take. “My shirt? What’s wrong with it?” He pulled the new shirt on over his t-shirt and buttoned it up, turning to look in the mirror as he did so. Chester was right. The new shirt looked like it had been created specifically for him, and Mike smiled at his reflection. 

“Well, there’s nothing wrong with it,” Chester said, his focus still finding a tidbit of the undershirt poking through on Mike’s neckline, “but, why?” He let out a sigh. Why did this guy have so many shirt issues? Sexy shirt, sexy body - put them together and you’re done! No need for undershirts and flannels. He gave Mike’s new shirt another look as he tried to push all his negative shirt thoughts away. “It looks good,” he mumbled, “but we need to roll up your sleeves.” He was quick with his work, taking each sleeve in his fingers and skillfully wrapping them neatly up to Mike’s elbows. 

Mike tugged at the hemline of the shirt, his fingers dipping underneath for a moment to pull the undershirt down and out of view. “I like it,” he said decisively. “If you truly can’t be seen with me in my flannel, I’ll let you buy this one.”

“We’re past that, Mike,” Chester said, his eyes bouncing all over his date’s upper body. “What are you hiding under there?” He pointed, his eyes alight with curiosity. “I don’t wear undershirts. I’m not even sure what the point is. Look,” he said, and before Mike could say anything, Chester had dropped the flannel to the floor, and had his own shirt unbuttoned and completely off. He had his white and green garment in his hand as he stood inches from his date. “No undershirt. Why would you add layers? It’s already fuckin’ hot in California.” He smoothed his hand down the front of his flat stomach instinctually. 

The temperature in the small dressing room shot up a few degrees as Mike couldn’t help but follow Chester’s hand down. His eyes took in the toned abs and the green waistband of Chester’s underwear that was peeking over the tops of his dark pants. Mike swallowed as his eyes travelled up Chester’s hand, flicking over his flame tattoos and landing on a different tattoo, colorful koi fish that were playing on his upper arm. Without thinking, he reached across the small space between them, drawn by the colors and the design, almost shocked when his fingertips touched the warmth of Chester’s skin. Mike traced over the fish, skimming his finger lightly over the design and following it up and across Chester’s shoulder, along the outline of the dragon he found there before he blinked. He pulled his hand back in surprise and looked at Chester, his face flushed pink again.

“Sorry,” he breathed, his pulse racing. “I just… I mean, wow. I’ve never seen such vivid colors on tattoos before.” 

“Don’t,” Chester whispered, his head shaking back and forth slowly. “Don’t ever be sorry for touching me. Touch all you want.” He leaned forward, closing the miniscule space between them even more. He could feel his heart picking up as he locked eyes with Mike - as something connected between them. _Those lips. Fuck, those lips._ Chester let his tongue slide out, wetting everything it could touch before he went to press another step forward to see if Mike would let him have a preemptive kiss. If nothing else, Chester had good aim, and a half a breath later, and he could taste the salt from Mike’s lips on his own. Chester shut his eyes, his hands going to either side of Mike’s head as he braced against the wall. He could feel the warmth of Mike’s mouth and breath on his lip ring, and then a little on his tongue, which was hanging out nearby, ready to be brought into the game. Chester felt his cock twitch, and he pulled back, taking a panting breath. 

_Oh. My. God._ The moment Chester closed the gap between them, Mike felt his knees go weak. It was like everything he’d ever seen in the sappy romance movies his mother used to watch on Saturday nights. His world narrowed to the feel of Chester’s mouth, the cool lip ring warming between the gentle shared pressure, the scent of sand and peaches and something else his mind couldn’t place flooding his senses. It was all he could do to stay upright, too hesitant to put his hands back on Chester’s naked torso to steady himself. The kiss was overwhelming, and when it broke, Mike stared at Chester, his mouth hanging open. He was terrified. He’d never felt anything like that before in any kiss he’d ever had. Suddenly he needed some space.

Chester felt the hot energy of arousal coursing through his legs and up his arms as he let one hand drop from the wall and tug lightly at a strand of Mike’s blue hair. “Want to skip dinner?” he asked, his lips still slightly parted as he breathed a little heavy. “We can go back to my place.” 

Mike knew he was way out of his depth as he stood, mesmerized by the desire in Chester’s eyes. Going back to Chester’s place meant one thing and one thing only - sex. A panic fluttered in his chest at the thought. He’d just met this guy. He hardly knew anything about him, other than he drove a flashy car and got worked up over shirts and kissed like he was trying to find the answers to some great mystery Mike held in his soul. He couldn’t go home with him, not right now, and he said the only thing he could think of in that moment. “We… we can’t go home… you just bought me a shirt. I have to wear it somewhere.”

Chester’s intense stare softened as his eyebrows folded together. “But I haven’t bought the shirt, yet,” he argued. “We can put it back, if that’s what’s stopping you.” 

With a desperate glance down at the buttons on the new shirt, Mike whispered, “I already have it on.”

It took Chester a second, but he slowly got the picture - Mike’s flushed cheeks, the sideways fall of his gaze, the picking of the buttons on his shirt. Chester took a step back before he reached down and snatched his discarded shirt from the floor. “Sorry,” he apologized as he quickly got dressed. “I didn’t mean to come on too strong. I know it’s still early. We decided on dinner, and that’s what we’ll do. Come on,” he said, picking up Mike’s flannel and draping it over his arm, “I’ll buy this kick ass shirt for you.” He opened the dressing room door and took a step out, the bright lights from overhead making him squint for a second. He glanced over his shoulder, ready to say something else, but Mike hadn’t moved. Chester waited another few seconds, but his date was frozen, his eyes popped like he wasn’t even sure where he was. “Hey,” Chester said, his voice hitting a low, calm tone as he took a step back and offered his hand, “come on, okay? I got your flannel and you still owe me an explanation about that undershirt - all good dinner conversation.” 

Unlike earlier, Mike hesitated just a moment before he slipped his hand into the already familiar warmth of Chester’s. He felt the other man squeeze his hand lightly, reassuringly, and he followed close behind as the shirt was paid for and they left the store. Mike had a finger pressed to his bottom lip, still thinking about the kiss, when they reached Chester’s car. Just like before, Chester opened the passenger door for him, this time watching Mike’s face a bit more closely.

Chester shut the door, but he took his time traveling around to the other side of the car. _Fuck. I think I scared him. I think he might be a little more innocent than I thought. Have to play this right. Pace my moves with him. Damn, he looks hella good in that shirt though._


	3. A Game For Two

Mike knew he was hiding behind his menu, but he couldn’t quite look directly at Chester yet. The menu was a perfect excuse to avoid eye contact and look like he was really just thinking about food at the moment - not Chester’s kiss - but he didn’t get past the appetizer section. Nachos were calling his name. _I can’t order nachos for dinner. He’d laugh at me. After all the shirt drama, he’s probably expecting me to order something stupid like a salad._ His eyes temporarily fell on a cheeseburger and potato wedges, and he decided anything with cheese would be okay. Which was why he really just wanted nachos. Spicy, melty, delicious cheese and crispy chips, some jalapenos on the side so he could add the perfect amount to each bite. Yes. He wanted nachos.

Chester looked over the top of his menu, his eyes settling on his date. _I wonder what he’ll order? I’m not sure we’ve really talked about food yet. Damn, these nachos look really good though._ “So, on a scale of one to five,” Chester said, setting his menu down on the table, “how hungry are you?” 

From behind the menu, Mike thought for a moment before he answered, “I don’t know. Is five the hungriest I’ve ever been and one is like, why are we even here?” He finally looked at Chester, a glimmer of amusement in his eyes. He’d never been asked to rate exactly how hungry he was on a date before.

Chester felt a blip of a smile press his lips as he watched Mike watching him. There were two levels for dining at the Skylight Gardens, and he and Mike had been seated on the lower level, which meant they got to sit close to the giant, potted tree-like thing in the middle of the room. It was draped in white Christmas lights, along with the railing that outlined the upper level. And right now, Mike’s dark eyes were reflecting those lights, making them look like they were sparkling. “Five means starving,” Chester said. “I’m only asking because I’m a five right about now, and these nachos sound insanely good.” He pointed down to his menu at the picture of the gooey appetizer, which was big enough for at least two people to eat. 

Mike’s eyes flicked down to the picture Chester was pointing at for a moment before his face broke into a huge grin. “I _love_ nachos!” he said. “I was totally looking at those and thinking about how amazing melty cheese sounded.” For just a moment his excitement faltered, but then he bravely went on, “do you want to share?”

“Exactly what I was thinking,” Chester assured him. “That’s why I asked how hungry you are.” He sat for a moment, letting the silence of their table surround them. Even though their date had gotten off to a rocky - and awkward - start, he was still having fun, and the thought of where the evening was going to lead was still exciting. 

A waitress came up to their table a minute later, and Chester was quick to order an appetizer of nachos for them to share, along with a Cherry Pepsi. He nodded to Mike, a little curious over what his date would want to drink. 

Flashing the waitress a smile, Mike said, “I’ll have a Sprite, please.” He looked back across the table at Chester, who had already turned his attention back to the menu, so he glanced up at the waitress and asked, “could we get some extra jalapenos on the side, as well?” 

Chester’s eyes darted up, just as the red-headed waitress walked away, promising to be back in just a minute with their drinks. “Extra jalapenos, huh? You like the hot stuff, I see.” 

Mike saw Chester looking at him with a mix of curiosity and amusement. “Well, each bite has to have the right amount of spiciness. I hate it when I get a nacho and there’s no jalapeno on it. I mean, they should be more careful in the back when they are sprinkling those things on. You can’t be haphazard about jalapenos. Having too many in one bite is just as bad as not having enough.”

It was the first rationalized, well thought out argument for jalapeno distribution that Chester had ever heard, and it was enticing. _He cares. He actually fuckin’ cares about this kind of stuff._ Chester nodded, giving his support to Mike’s jalapeno analysis as he slipped his shoe off under the table, letting one alien sock free into the open air. Chester averted his eyes back down to the menu as he lifted his leg, rubbing his toes gently against Mike’s pant leg. 

_Is that... Is he touching my leg? I think he’s touching my leg!_ Mike kept staring over his menu at the top of Chester’s head, trying to figure out what his next move should be. Chester certainly seemed to have no problem with physical touch, and he didn’t want to seem unwilling, but he’d never had a first date with this level of familiarity already. The red tips of Chester’s mohawk were pointed right at him, daring him to make a move of his own, while Chester’s chin was pointed down at the menu in thought. _He’s waiting to see what I’m going to do._

“What are you going to order?” Mike managed to ask in a relatively normal tone of voice, even as he felt Chester’s toes creep higher up his calf. “I’m thinking about this cheeseburger.” His heart was racing but he was trying hard to maintain his composure.

“Steak,” Chester answered, keeping his head down. He was gripping his toes against the fabric of Mike’s pants, and he could tell his date was ready to burst either in excitement or annoyance, he wasn’t sure which yet, but he wanted to push him so he could find out. _He’s actually not saying anything. I wonder how far up his leg he’ll let me go before he stops me? It’s like a challenge now._ “Probably this Bourbon Street Steak,” he said, letting his menu finally fall to the table as he shifted a little in his seat, to get a better angle for his roaming foot under the table. 

“That sounds good,” Mike agreed, his breath a little short. Chester’s toes were at his knee, and Mike was simultaneously impressed he could reach that far, and freaked out that he’d let him get that far up his leg. His hand shot under the table and he grabbed Chester’s foot, pressing his thumb into his arch and stilling the journey up his leg. “Can I help you?” he asked, an eyebrow lifted in Chester’s direction. He didn’t want to seem easy, but there was no denying that Chester was getting under his skin. 

Chester’s grin went wide, his tongue coming out between his teeth for a second. “I was wondering if I might have been accidently feeling up the table leg.” He chuckled, and he caught the glint in Mike’s eyes. “I’m sorry,” he added, pulling his mirth back in. “I was just playing.” 

Still holding Chester’s foot in his hand, Mike narrowed his eyes and said, “tell me, Chester, what other types of things do you like to do for fun?” He felt bold and he was proud of himself for being able to flirt when he wasn’t hidden behind a phone screen. It was so much harder when Chester was there to use his body as a distraction. 

Chester pursed his lips for a moment as he gauged Mike’s tone and the firmness in which he was still holding his socked foot. “I like movies,” Chester said, as he managed to get his other shoe off by use of the chair leg. “Going to movies and watching them at home. Nothing better than lying in bed - naked - with popcorn and watching a movie.” He paused as he poked his other foot forward, trying to keep his balance now with both his feet in the air under the table. “And food. I love food and my car. Going for drives is fun. And I like the beach. It is California, after all.” He nudged Mike’s hand with his free foot, almost losing his position on his seat as he did. He had to grab the edge of the table to steady himself and gain some leverage, but it was all worth it. Mike was finally playing back with him now, which felt like an accomplishment. 

Mike’s right hand went under the table and he caught Chester’s other foot, shaking his head as he let slip, “you smell like the beach. And warmth. And peaches.” _Oh, God. Did I really just say that out loud? How stupid. How can you smell like warmth? What am I supposed to do with his feet in my hands?_ For what felt like the millionth time that evening, Mike blushed and he ducked his head, wishing he could stuff the words back inside his mouth.

“Peaches, huh? Guess that’s my shampoo you caught wind of. . .or maybe my hand soap,” Chester said, wiggling his toes in Mike’s hands. Even in this awkward position, he was willing to let himself stayed captured. Mike’s hands were warm, and those long fingers of his were clamped around Chester’s socks like he was part octopus. “And, uh, my loft is just off the beach,” he added, “so I’m down there a lot. Actually, that’s a lie,” he admitted, shaking his head. “I always say it’s just off the beach, but it’s actually a few city blocks away. But the walk to get there isn’t bad. I’m always dragging sand in the house.” 

The waitress re-appeared with not only their drinks, but their nachos. “That was fast,” Mike commented as he felt his stomach rumble. He didn’t want to let go of Chester’s feet yet, but he didn’t think sticking his face in a plate of nachos would be the sexiest move. Before he could let go, the waitress asked if they were ready to order. It took Mike a second to remember what he wanted.

“I’ll take the cheeseburger, medium, with the potato wedges. Is there any way I can get some cheese sauce on the side for my potatoes?” Mike sent a hopeful took in the waitress’ direction, happy when she nodded as she scribbled down his order, then looked at Chester.

“And I’ll take the Bourbon,” he said, “Burn it to a crisp, please. And some of that cheese sauce for my wedges, too.” He handed the waitress his menu, and he reached across the table with a bit of a strain, but he managed to get Mike’s as well, since he wasn’t wanting to give his date a reason to let go of his feet just yet. 

As the waitress walked away, Mike rubbed his thumbs over Chester’s feet and commented, “I _love_ cheese.” 

“Cheese is the best,” Chester replied, an enthused smile gracing his features as he wiggled his toes into Mike’s fingers. He waited a second, before he reached for the plate of nachos sitting between them. “Damn, these look good,” he said, inhaling the spicy smell of the cheese and jalapenos and the beefy mixture of salsa and onions that was layered among the white corn chips. 

With a squeeze and a smile in Chester’s direction, Mike let go of his sock-covered feet. _He looks disappointed. Well, I don’t know why he thinks I’m going to sit here rubbing his feet and letting him eat all the nachos._ He cleared his throat as he moved his Sprite aside and laid his napkin down. “Living so close to the beach sounds amazing. I think I’d love that. You said you’ve got a loft? You’ll have to tell me about it when I get back. I need to… well, just excuse me for a second.” He stood up, looking around for a restroom. He couldn’t eat until he washed his hands, no matter how good those nachos smelled. 

Chester said, “Okay, no problem. Can’t promise I won’t eat all of these, though, so you better hurry your cute ass up.” He whipped his head toward Mike, licking his lips and snatching the stray bit of cheese sauce that was clinging to the ball of his lip ring. He heard Mike mumble something about not being long, and then Chester was back on the food. 

_In the right situation, I bet he gives great foot rubs. That’s kind of priceless. Can’t believe he grabbed my feet. He’s funny._ His thoughts trailed a little further as he picked at the nachos, making sure to take the ones with less jalapenos on them - Mike could have those. 

He took a few long drinks of his Cherry Pepsi as he paced his eating. He really didn’t want to look like a total pig, even though at his moment he probably could have wolfed down the entire plate by himself. But instead he fidgeted with his wrapped silverware and managed to get both his shoes back on, just as Mike returned to the table. 

Chester could smell the clean scent of soap. “Guess I gotta give you points for washing your hands after you’ve been touching my feet,” he offered with a goofy inflection. “Even though they’re clean socks. You’ll have to look at what you were touching later. They have aliens on them.” He pointed to the green breast pocket on his shirt. “They match this color. My underwear does, too, just so you know,” he added with a sly wink before he grabbed another drippy-cheese chip. 

“I see you managed to save me a few,” Mike teased as he put his napkin back in his lap and reached for a chip, holding it over his small plate as he speared a jalapeno and placed it perfectly on top. It was every bit as good as he thought it would be. “Mmmmm,” he mumbled around a mouthful of cheesy goodness. All of his ingrained childhood manners forced him to swallow before he said, “these are so good.” He paused, watching Chester reaching for another chip. He knew how to keep him out of the nachos. “Now, these aliens,” he started, trying to picture the socks he’d just been holding, “are they the reason you have to compulsively match all of your clothing? Were you abducted as a child or something?” Mike was hoping for some long, dopey story that would make him laugh and give him time to eat his perfectly jalapenoed nachos before Chester ate them all.

“Wow, look who owns an acid tongue,” Chester teased. “But no, sadly, I’ve never been abducted. Not sure aliens would want me.” He grabbed another nacho and stuffed it in his mouth. He chewed on it for a minute, letting the meat and cheese tickle his taste buds for a minute before he swallowed. “So tell me about this female roommate of yours. . .are you and her, uh, friends with benefits? Or are you completely one way?” 

With his chip halfway to his mouth, Mike’s eyes settled back on Chester. He set the chip down on the plate and reached for his Sprite. “Anna? We’re the farthest thing from friends with benefits you could ever imagine. More like friends with mutually depressing bank accounts.” He mentally chastised himself for giving out that information and rushed on, “we kind of fell together in circumstance. My, um, situation changed suddenly and I needed a place. It’s not really big enough for two, but she offered, and me being able to help with rent helps her out. So,” he concluded after a quick sip, “we’re just roommates.” 

Chester nodded. For a brief moment he thought about asking how Mike’s situation had changed, landing him with the bookworm for a roommate, but he decided against it. If Mike wanted to tell him, he would have. “I don’t have a roommate. Sometimes I wish I did. It can get lonely there by myself and. . .I really like company.” 

“I bet you have an amazing view, though,” Mike said thoughtfully. “It’s probably a great place to draw, or paint.” 

Chester almost laughed. “I suppose,” he said, holding his drink in his hand, “if I could do either of those things. I can draw a mean stick figure. That’s about it.” He took a sip of his soda just as the waitress re-appeared with their food. She quickly sat their plates down in front of them before asking if they needed anything else. 

“No, this looks great,” Chester offered, and then they were alone again, the comfort of food between them as they stole glances across the table and asked questions about one another. 

****

One cheeseburger, a steak, and two helpings of potato wedges with way too much cheese sauce later, and Mike found himself staring at Chester’s perfectly round ass, bent over the pool table as he tried unsuccessfully to make a shot. “Damn,” Chester swore as he watched the cue ball totally miss the eleven ball he’d been aiming for. He stood himself up straight, his black pool stick in his hand as he looked to Mike. “Your shot.” 

“You really know how to set me up,” Mike grumbled playfully as he looked at the cue, unhelpfully placed at the edge of the corner pocket. “You’re lucky you didn’t scratch.” Edging around the table, Mike considered his available shots. He was feeling the thrill of impending victory. There were only two solids left on the table, and Chester had six left. He knew that Chester was checking him out every time he bent to take a shot because he was doing exactly the same thing. It was hard to concentrate with the perfect picture of Chester over the table, his flamed arms outstretched… _focus, Shinoda. Finish this off. He’ll be impressed with you._

He took the shot and felt the zip of excitement through his body. One left and he’d be going for the eight ball.

“You’re absolutely whoopin’ me,” Chester said, leaning on his pool stick as he watched Mike move around the table. “And have I said how sexy that shirt looks on you? Especially when you lean over the table.” His next move was unplanned. Mike was lining up his shot, and Chester was right there, his body scooting behind him, as he brushed his front up against Mike’s back side. “Oops,” he whispered, leaning close to Mike’s ear before he moved along and added, “Sorry about that. Just trying to see you from a better angle.” 

“Fuck,” Mike exhaled sharply as he missed the shot. _That’s not my fault. He’s distracting me._. Without a doubt, Mike was distracted by the thrill of Chester so close, and he felt his cock twitch at the other man’s proximity. He looked over at Chester, his competitive nature dissolving as he zeroed in on the other man’s sly smile, that lip ring beckoning him. He was caught between the desire to kiss him again and the desire to kick his ass at pool. Maybe he could do both. 

“Hope that wasn’t my fault,” Chester chuckled lightly as he walked around the table, eyeing his striped collection of pool balls, which he was hating at the moment. He’d never been particularly good at this game, but he always seemed to volunteer to play. When Mike had suggested it, since the Skylight Gardens had an entire set up, he couldn’t say no. Now he was losing, and even though his ego was taking a bit of a hit, it was worth it. It was worth the failure to see Mike Shinoda’s shirt ride up a little on his back when he leaned over. It was worth it to see his blue tinted hair look extra vibrant under the these low hanging lights around the tables. It was worth it to keep catching eye contact and grabbing the opportunity to brush past him whenever he got the chance. He’d already made a couple of stick and hole jokes, and he’d even gotten Mike to laugh once or twice. He had a nice laugh, a laugh that tickled something inside of Chester’s humor box. 

He took a deep breath, lined up his next shot, hoping to at least come a little closer to Mike’s ball count before he totally lost, and _bam!_ No such luck. The cue ball knocked into the one he was aiming for, but it missed the pocket completely. _God, I suck. Hope he doesn’t hold this against me. I should get one of these tables. I’ve got room. I think._

The set up was perfect, and Mike watched as the cue ball from Chester’s missed shot landed behind the eight ball, pointing directly at the pocket. He grinned and scooted past Chester. “Excuse me while I sink this shot,” he said confidently, and seconds later, the game was over. 

Laying his pool stick down on the table, Mike moved in front of Chester, amused at the bit of frustration he could see on his face. “I win,” he teased, his body high on the thrill of the barely- there touches and winning the game. _He looks like he hates to lose. Well, I do, too. And we both can’t always win._ When their eyes locked together, Mike couldn’t stop himself from sliding his hand up Chester’s forearm, tracing over his tattoo again without even looking, and then he took that final step forward, softly bumping his lips against Chester’s cheek. “I like winning,” he breathed, a bit of a smirk on his face.

He pulled back and their eyes met again, and it was all the encouragement Mike needed. It was obvious they both wanted this, and as Mike pressed forward, bringing Chester’s lip ring between his lips, it felt like he’d won more than just a pool game.

Mike’s victory kiss to Chester’s cheek had caught him off guard. After all the blushing and barely-there flirting he’d been getting out of Mike all evening, he never imagined winning a game of pool would boost the other man’s confidence so much. And now, Mike’s warm lips were on his, and Chester’s mind shut off. With his pool stick still in one hand, Chester wrapped his free arm around Mike’s waist. He pulled his date a little closer, letting the kiss deepen from his end. He could taste the lingering essence of cheese on Mike’s lips, and just like the nachos from earlier, Chester was keen to have more. He shoved his tongue forward, ready to break through this chaste pleasure Mike had started. 

For a moment, Mike’s body was all go. He could feel Chester’s body lined up against his, and he pulled the front of Chester’s shirt closer, inhaling the beach and the peaches as he allowed the kiss to consume him. It was even better than the kiss they’d shared in the dressing room, and Mike pulled away for a second just to dive back in, the feel of Chester’s warm lips and tongue sending sparks through his body. He wanted to just let go and let it happen, but the little voice in the back of his mind reminded him they were standing in the middle of a public space. Reluctantly he pulled away, his lips glistening in the light, and looked at Chester. His pupils were dilated and his breathing short and sharp, and Mike knew they needed to get out of there before they gave everyone a show. 

Chester’s fingers were gliding up Mike’s side. “Don’t stop,” he said, his voice low and needy as he went to lean forward so they could do more. His body was pulsing with sexual energy, and Mike was looking at him now like he was ready to finally remove that undershirt of his. 

But Chester’s new advance was dodged, throwing him for a small loop, a loop he recalculated instantly. He let his hand slip up the back of Mike’s shirt, his fingertips brushing skin, and he shivered. “We can go,” he offered now, “I know this is in front of everyone.” He leaned in again, letting his lips fall close to Mike’s ear and hair, which smelled a little like coconut - a scent pleasing to Chester’s brain. 

“Yeah,” Mike whispered, “let’s get out of here.” He took a step back, his body screaming at the loss of contact, and looked around. It didn’t seem like they’d made too big of a scene. _I want more, I can’t believe I’m thinking like this, but Chester’s making me feel crazy! I never knew kissing someone could be this amazing._ Mike didn’t miss the anticipation in Chester’s expression as he ditched the pool stick and grabbed his hand, starting for the door.

They were headed for the stairs, ready to get back up to the main level and back out to Chester’s car when they suddenly heard a gruff voice behind them. They stopped, just long enough to see a couple of bigger guys at one of the other tables. Fancy shirts and expensive shoes, and nasty attitudes to the nines, as one of them made a comment about homos kissing in public places where people were trying to eat. 

Chester’s fist clenched. He felt Mike’s hand squeeze his, as he went to take a step toward the guy.

“What?” the man said, puffing out his chest, his blonde crew cut more annoying than his silk tie, “you got something to say?” 

Chester had a lot to say. He had lists of things he could belt at this guy, but as he readied his first verbal bullet, he caught sight of a few members of the wait staff headed their way. _Shit. I don’t want us to get kicked out. I definitely don’t want them to call the cops._ He took a deep breath, and instead grumbled a quick, “No,” before he turned back toward the exit, pulling Mike along with him. 

The mood from just moments ago had disappeared as Mike watched the almost confrontation go down, and Joe’s words from the night he’d met Chester came back to him. _Self-defense. He talked about Chester and some troubles… would he have been able to get us out of a bad situation?_ He glanced down at their linked hands, then over at Chester’s expression, his lips pressed together in a flat line of anger. 

“If there’s one thing I can’t stand, it’s assholes,” Chester seethed as they made their way outside, the cooler evening air feeling like relief. “Sorry about that,” he added, glancing Mike’s way, his tone softening. “Crummy way to follow up your victory over my sorry pool-playing ass.” 

“Well, I know one thing that always improves an evening,” Mike said as they reached Chester’s car. “Ice cream.”

Chester tossed him a sideways glance as he opened the passenger side door. “Ice cream?” 

With sparkling eyes in a serious face, Mike nodded. “Yep. Ice cream. It’s the only way to take the edge off a stressful day.” He waited for Chester to agree, hoping ice cream didn’t sound too childish. He could practically taste the cold, sweet dessert as he got in the car.

Chester shut the door without saying anything. _Ice cream? Where the hell do we even go to get ice cream at this hour?_ He checked his watch as he moved around the back of the car. It had been a long time since he’d had ice cream. It just wasn’t a dessert he indulged in too often, and now as he opened his door and climbed in, he was a little lost for a next move. 

“I know a place that will mix whatever you want into your ice cream,” Mike enthused, still waiting for Chester to agree. “Sometimes I get mint and have them put chocolate chips in it, but sometimes I do Oreos. And sometimes I get sweet cream and have oreos crumbled up inside. I mean, the possibilities are endless. What do you think?”

Chester’s hands were on his legs, as he stared at Mike across the darkened car. He could see bits and pieces of his date’s face from the street lights shining through - his scruffy goatee, the corner of his earlobe and the dangling hoop earring that was there. The outline of his shoulder, and the curve of his neck. _That neck. God, I want it. I bet I could latch onto it and suck for hours._ But it wasn’t even Mike’s neck that got Chester in the mood for ice cream. It was the fact that Mike cared so much. _First the jalapenos, now this. It’s like he makes food an adventure._

Chester cleared his throat as he turned the car on, the engine coming to life. “Alright,” he said, “where is this magical ice cream place of yours?” 

****

It was the perfect temperature outside for ice cream - not so hot that the cone melted and dripped, but not cool enough for the breeze to cause Mike to shiver as he ate. The small wooden bench outside his favorite ice creamery was just big enough for him and Chester to sit side by side, staring out at the traffic as it passed them by. _This is the perfect way to end the night. I’ve got the hottest guy next to me, and I have ice cream. And there was cheese, and Chester’s ass, and god, those kisses…_ Mike stole a glance at the man next to him. Despite Chester’s initial reluctance to have ice cream, he sure looked like he was enjoying himself. The butter pecan cone he was licking rather suggestively was in his left hand, and Mike realized, as he looked down at Chester’s right hand that was resting on his thigh, that he must be left handed. 

_The turtle. There must be a story behind a tattoo that small. All of them, really. But I’m going to start with this one._ Before he could talk himself out of it, Mike licked his mint chocolate chip cone, and reached his left hand over to cover Chester’s. He caught the look of surprise, then encouragement, from Chester as their hands met. “Tell me about this little tattoo,” Mike asked, a goofy smile on his face as he took another lick.

Chester pulled his hand away so he could hold it up, showing off the little turtle shaped shell tattoo on his pinky. “That’s my birthstone, but it’s more turtle-looking,” he said with a slight chuckle. “I really need to get it touched up, but, eh, priorities. Plus, that one hurt like a mother,” he hissed at the memory, shaking his hand. “So I’ve been avoiding doing anything with it.” 

“Seems like they all probably hurt,” Mike thought aloud, a little miffed that his hand holding move had been denied. “I can’t imagine that little one hurting more than your wrists.” He kept his hands to himself and watched Chester lick around the top of his cone again. It was ridiculous how agonizing it was to watch his tongue lap up the ice cream from the cone. 

“Everyone’s different,” Chester answered immediately. If there was one thing he could talk about, it was tattoos. “And different places on the body come with a different pain range. These,” he said, holding both his forearms up to show off his flames, “hurt a lot around my wrists, but the higher up they went, it wasn’t as bad. Veins and stuff, you know. And anything close to bone is more sensitive.” He shot Mike a cockeyed side look. “What about you? You got any ink hiding under all those clothes?” he asked, letting his fingers drift over and pet the front of Mike’s shirt for a second. 

Mike’s fingers felt tingly when Chester touched him. It was like the other man was made of electricity. “Me? No… I’ve never thought of anything I wanted permanently. I’m afraid I’d change my mind right after it was done, and then I’d hate it. I’m always doodling little things I think are good, and then the next day, I’m all - what the fuck is that?” He shrugged before he said, “I guess it’s a commitment thing.”

Chester let his gaze linger a bit longer, watching as Mike licked his green ice cream, and the way his tongue kept flipping out to snatch stray smears from his lips. It was enough to give Chester a warm feeling, a feeling of pleasure knowing that he was not only having a good time with this new guy, but that if everything went the way he thought it was going to go, he’d get to be licked by that tongue later, just like the ice cream. He cleared his throat before he looked away, ordering himself to stop staring. “I’m the opposite with tattoos,” he said, dipping his tongue down around the edge of the top of the cone now, trying to hurry things along. “I see what I want, or I draw something I really like, and _bam!_ ” he shouted, his empty hand making a pumped fist in the air, “I’m all in. I’m definitely a run and jump in the pool kinda guy. I guess you’re more like. . .toes in first?” 

“You could say that,” Mike agreed, chuckling. “I definitely like to warm up a little bit before I dive right in.” He raised an eyebrow at Chester as he swiped his tongue along his ice cream, smirking a little as he watched Chester watching him. It was fun to tease him a bit, even though Mike knew there was only so far their night would go. He knew better than to give too much away on the first date, especially given the history of assholes he’d been with. When it was over - as it inevitably was - he’d always congratulated himself on being cautious and deliberate with his actions. He definitely wanted to kiss Chester again, but he also wanted to ensure there would be another date. 

“It’s funny how opposite we are on some things,” Chester said as he shifted in his seat, stretching his legs out in front of him. He looked out past the traffic, toward the setting sun. It would be dark soon, and that was okay with him. Dark meant their date was nearing an end, and the end was something he was looking forward to. Even though things had started out rather awkwardly, Chester still had Mike’s victory kiss in his mind. Surely that meant that he wanted more, didn’t it? _Of course it does. He’s done nothing but flirt with me over texts for days. . .and now, just like he said, he’s warmed up._ He scooted over a little, letting his arm brush against Mike’s and then he nudged him a little more, cocking a smile when Mike looked his way with his big brown eyes that made Chester’s insides feel like jelly. “But, I think there’s one thing we agree on,” Chester said, giving his date his best sexy look, his tongue rolling out to tease his lip ring. 

The ice cream in Mike’s hand was forgotten as he watched the tongue that had been teasing him all night flick over the lip ring he couldn’t stop looking at. He wanted another kiss, and here was Chester, offering one up so easily. Only a few inches separated them, and Mike closed the gap effortlessly, feeling so much more confident than he had hours ago. The kiss was sweet and sticky, and Mike couldn’t stop the soft moan of approval when he parted his lips and Chester’s tongue found his. Ice cream was the last thing on his mind as he leaned into the warmth of their kiss. 

Chester shut his eyes. _Fuck. Here’s kiss number two from him. And a moan._ His mind didn’t come up with much else as he let his tongue caress over Mike’s. He’d never much cared for mint anything, but the cool sensation in Mike’s mouth, mixed with the heat they were working up, was oddly pleasant. 

Chester shifted enough to get his free hand on Mike’s leg, slowly moving it up his thigh, his eyes closed as his brain started to work out his next move. They needed to finish this ice cream, and then they could head back to Mike’s place. Chester had already gotten a rejection to go back to his loft, but if they went back to Mike’s apartment, maybe the piano teacher’s confidence would remain. 

Chester smiled at the thought, breaking their kiss. His eyes were partly shut, his lips parted as he breathed. “This bench isn’t much for making out.” He sat himself up, and quickly took a chunk out of his cone; in another bite or two, he’d be done with it. “But I won’t lie, I, uh, I like kissing you.” He gave Mike a sideways look. “I like it when you pull a little on my lip ring. It’s a turn on.” 

A little bit breathless, Mike nodded. “I’m finished,” he breathed, his eyes on Chester’s mouth. “And… I fuckin’ love your lip ring.” He stood up and tossed the rest of his cone into the nearby trash can, then turned back to Chester expectantly.

“I’m with you,” Chester practically cheered as he bounced from his seat and quickly tossed the last bit of his cone into the trash. “The ice cream was good, but I’m ready to get out of here.” He saddled himself beside Mike, slipping his hand behind the other man’s lower back. “Come on, let’s head back to your place.” 

With a nod, Mike allowed himself to be led back to the car, his head spinning with excitement and anxiety. _I think I may have given him the wrong idea just now… but I really don’t want to stop yet. I can’t take him inside, I know Anna is waiting up for me, she’s always waiting up for me after a first date, to make sure I get home okay._ He kept talking to himself as Chester navigated the turns back to his apartment, the bundle of nerves in his stomach expanding and taking over completely when they arrived. 

Chester was out of the car in a flash, holding Mike’s door open and smiling down at him, and Mike felt the panic. _It was too much, and now I don’t know how to stop._ Before he knew it they were on his doorstep, and Chester’s hand had crept behind his neck, and Mike didn’t have the first idea how to say no. So he didn’t. He just shut his eyes and let Chester kiss him again.

Mike’s neck was warm. Chester let his fingers feather all the way up to his hairline, and then he let them slide back down, gently fondling one of the piano teacher’s hoop earrings and then just behind his ear, which brought out another moan, and Chester’s cock twitched to life. 

_He’s not as innocent as I thought. He’s got a spot. I like it._ He sent his fingers back to that same place, pressing the soft skin that was there. He felt the shape of the tendons and muscles and the shell of Mike’s ear, and he got just what he wanted. It wouldn’t take long. He pressed forward, lining his body right up with Mike’s as he maneuvered them around, and now he had Mike’s back against the door. Chester let his other hand go to Mike’s hip, his fingers madly trying to find their way up and under his two shirts. _Why? Why must he wear this thing?? Oh well, I’ll get it off of him. He wants it. I can feel it._ He abandoned his shirt qwest to shove his lower half hard against Mike’s making sure the message came across loud and clear. 

That was it, the signal, and it took Mike great effort to turn his head just a little, breaking their kiss as he gasped out, “Chester, wait.” His eyes were scrunched together as though he couldn’t believe he’d stopped them, but the feel of both their hard dicks pressed together was too much. _This is too much, too fast, I can’t do this. He’s expecting sex and I can’t do that right now! I don’t know his birthday or his middle name, or where he was born, or his favorite color!_ “Chester,” he tried again as he felt the other man’s finger tips brush against his neck, sending another shiver down his spine. “Wait a minute.”

Chester stopped, though that took an incredible show of willpower as he kept his mouth right next Mike’s cheek, breathing heavy. “Wait for what?” 

Mike stumbled over his words, his eyes still shut tight. “I… God, this feels good, and you taste good, and I like you, a lot…” 

Chester’s mouth snapped shut. He pulled his head back, his eyes narrowed as he inspected Mike’s flushed face that looked more panicked than turned on as he stood with his eyes closed. “You want to, don’t you?” Chester asked, a hand reaching for Mike’s side, his fingers feeling over the soft material of the shirt he’d bought his date a few hours before. “I mean, come on.”

He did. God, did he. But what if Chester was like the others? It was too soon to know, and Mike opened his eyes to see his date, his eyes heavy with arousal, staring back at him. “I do… but, Anna…” His voice trailed off weakly, and Mike knew that argument wasn’t going to work. Chester had already offered up his place, and Mike knew that’s where he’d end up if he wasn’t honest. “It’s just… too soon for me.” He closed his eyes and bit his lip, not wanting to watch the disappointment take over Chester’s expression.

Chester checked his watch. “Too soon?” He looked at Mike, and back at the time, before he prepared to offer they go do something else first, if it was too early. Who was he to hate on someone wanting to wait till later in the evening to have sex? He wasn’t. He was a giver. He could understand and work around Mike’s quirks. “Okay,” he said, his hand dropping to grab Mike’s. “What do you want to do? How much time do we need to waste till you’re ready?” He looked at the time again. “I mean, I’ve got all night, but what are you thinking? An hour from now? Two?” 

Mike squeezed Chester’s hand and swallowed hard, trying to calm his body down. “I don’t mean tonight, Chester.” His eyes dropped to their hands, and then he studied the tops of Chester’s green and black Sketchers. “I’m saying… I had a great time tonight. And I hope you did too. And that you want to go out again, soon.” He chanced a meaningful look up at Chester, hoping he’d get the message this time.

Chester’s enthusiastic smile dropped. “Oh,” he said, the light going out of his eyes. “Oh, okay.” He looked at Mike, and then out toward his car. _What the hell went wrong? Why is he playing cold on me?_ “Did, I. . .” he paused for a moment, debating on how much he wanted to say. How much he wanted to ask. It was clear he wasn’t going to get what he wanted, and as frustration and confusion started to replace the arousal that had been so present only seconds ago, his head dropped. “I get it,” he mumbled. He let out a sigh and looked up to see Mike watching him. “Whatever,” he said quickly as he readied his keys. 

_There it is. Now he’s done with me before it even got started. I really screwed this up._ Mike couldn’t help the feeling of defeat as it raced through him. _I really wanted this to work out._ He found his voice, even though it came out more timidly than he intended. “I really would like to see you again,” he said and then waited anxiously, worrying his bottom lip with his teeth as he stared at Chester. 

The evening air was a little cooler now, and Chester had been watching a stray cat off in the parking lot for the last minute or so, as he tried to figure out what to do next. Somewhere, something inside of him felt used, but more than that, it was disappointment. He turned away, and headed down the steps, his stomach feeling sick as pictures of their date flashed through his mind - the nachos, the game of pool and how excited Mike had been to win. The ice cream, and the way Mike kissed. . .God, the way he kissed. 

_I like him. Dammit, I like him a lot. Whatever I did wrong, maybe I can fix it. He said he wants to go out again._ He stopped, and spun around, catching Mike’s hurt face underneath the porch light. “I’m sorry,” he said, taking a step back toward the porch and looking up at his date. “I didn’t mean to sound like a jerk just now. I guess, I guess I thought we were really hitting it off and on the same page about all this.” He motioned toward the door. “But since we’re not, yeah. I’d like to go on another date. I had fun,” he admitted, a sheepish smile crossing his lips. “I think you’re the first person ever to invite me to go get ice cream. Pathetic as that is.” 

Mike felt the little leap his heart took as Chester turned and looked back at him. Maybe it wasn’t a complete loss after all. “It’s not pathetic,” he assured the other man with relief. “But now you know what you’ve been missing.” With a smile, he made his way down the steps and stopped, looking at the way the street lamp illuminated the ends of the red mohawk, making them pink. The light glinted off Chester’s lip ring as though it were signaling its own goodbye, and Mike leaned in, planting a quick kiss to Chester’s cheek before he bounded back up the steps. “Good night, Ches.” 

He was inside the door before he heard a response, and he leaned against it, a silly smile across his lips as he thought about the night. _I’m going to see him again! I can’t wait for him to call! Well, text, he’ll probably text! Will he text me tonight?!”_ Mike’s entire body was alight with excitement. 

Anna was in the living room in her pink robe, which matched her current hair color. She was sitting in their only comfortable chair, her legs crossed, a book in her lap. She looked up the moment the door had opened to see Mike rushing in. She heard another man’s voice from outside holler, “Goodnight, Sexy!” but even with leaning all the way over the arm of her chair, she hadn’t been able to catch a glimpse of her roommate’s date. “Wow, he called you sexy,” she said, a little giggle escaping with her words as she sat back up straight. 

Peeling himself off the door, Mike shot her a goofy smile. “Yeah, he’s a little over the top.” He hugged his arms around himself as he looked at her, and his face slipped into seriousness for a moment. “But you should see him, Anna… Oh. My. God. He is so hot!”

She sat her book off to the side. “Tell me,” she said, repressing her smile. “I want to hear all about him. He sounds like he has a nice voice.” If there was one thing she’d never get enough of, it was good stories about dates from Mike. He’d been in such a dating slump lately, every guy turning out to be a nightmare, that the sight of him now, deliriously giddy as he stood by the door, was exciting. 

All of Mike’s words came out in a jumbled rush as his mind recounted their date. “Well, you’re going to love his hair. He’s got a red mohawk! And a lip ring,” he smiled as he thought of how he already enjoyed sucking on that lip ring - a lot. “And his eyes, God, Anna, they’re so expressive. We went to dinner and had nachos, and he loves cheese too! Oh, and before that we went shopping, and he bought me this shirt,” he smoothed his hands down the front of the new shirt proudly, “and, we kissed, _in the dressing room of the store!_ ” Mike’s voice had dropped a bit, as though kissing in a store dressing room was completely scandalous. “He’s so quirky, he had on alien socks, and I was touching his socks and he was touching my leg, and then I totally kicked his ass at pool, because, you know, I’m the best at pool, and I think he was a bit surprised by that. But you know, I kick everyone’s ass at pool.”

He stopped for a moment to take a breath, and squeezed his arms back around himself again, this time tighter. “You’d be so proud of me, Ann, I kissed him, right there by the pool table, and it was so amazing…” Mike’s expression drifted away to some place dreamy for a moment as he revisited that kiss in his mind, practically feeling Chester’s lips against his again. “And then we got ice cream, and now I’m home, and we’re going to go out again. At least, he said we would. Oh, God, what if he doesn’t text me? How long should I wait before I text him?” With the end of the description of the date came the fear again, for a moment, that maybe Chester wouldn’t want to see him again. He looked at Anna for reassurance.

“Woah, Mike, slow down,” she said, sitting forward and putting one hand out. “I think it all sounds amazing and, it’s a nice shirt,” she said, pointing, “I thought something was different about you.” She paused for a moment, thinking how odd it was that this guy would take Mike shopping on a first date, but obviously her roommate didn’t mind, so what did it matter? _He needs something other than flannel in his life anyway. I’m with this guy. New shirt is good._ “And if everything went so great,” she said, hoping not to say something that would set Mike off, “why wouldn’t he want to go out again? Especially if he said he wanted to. Don’t overthink it, Mike. He called you _sexy_ , I’m sure he’s interested in a date number two. At least that’s the impression I got,” she defended, her hand going to her chest. 

Mike’s expression dropped a bit more and he shifted his eyes to the ground before he said, “well, I may have… well, you know how I am… I may have put him off a little bit, tonight.” He rushed to go on, “we were kissing, and it was so good - I’m telling you, he’s a great kisser - and I knew he wanted more, but… I can’t do that, you know? Not with someone I’ve just met.”

He and Anna had talked quite a bit about Mike’s relationship hangups, one of which being what Anna called a fear of intimacy. Mike didn’t think that was really the issue. It was smart to be cautious. It had helped him avoid complications in the past. But tonight, that caution had almost cost him a second date.

“You know,” she said with a thoughtful expression, “if he really likes you, and it seems like he does, then he’ll call. Believe me, Mike, you aren’t the first person on the planet to say _no_ on a first date. I think your evening sounds lovely,” she stated as she stood up. “Why don’t I make us some tea and you can give me more details.” She was already headed toward their compact kitchen as she heard Mike finally come away from the door and really enter the living space. She glanced over her shoulder to see his blue hair looking a bit drab. _I need to re-do that for him. Or maybe a different color. Maybe I’ll dye it red for him, so he’ll match his new stud._

“Sounds great,” Mike called after her happily, flopping down in the chair Anna had just vacated, running his hands over his shirt again. All of the little memories of his evening with Chester swam across his mind as he leaned his head back and closed his eyes for a moment, realizing he was too excited to go to sleep. He settled in for a long night of girl talk before heading off to bed, the thought of Chester’s warm kisses bringing a smile to his face as he waited for Anna to return.


	4. Opposites Attract

Everything was set. Chester had spent the last three hours making sure that when Mike Shinoda showed up at his front door, there would be nothing but magic going on. He twirled around his kitchen, his lobster claw oven mitt snuggly fit onto one hand as he pulled a glass casserole dish from the oven. He set it on a cooling rack, before he leaned over and inhaled the bubbling cheese and rich red tomato sauce of the chicken Parmesan. _Mike’s going to love it._ Had there been a mirror close by, he might have seen the giddy grin scrolling across his face or the bounce in his step as he clicked the oven off. He shoved the dish back in so it would stay warm, and pulled the platter of crisp garlic bread out. 

He pulled his oven mitt off and leaned against the white and gray patterned granite countertop as he looked out over his loft apartment. His shoulders slumped a bit as something like tiredness drifted across him. He’d swept and mopped every inch of the polished, dark cement floors that stretched from one end of the loft to the other. He fluffed the gray throw pillows that decorated his white scrolled-end couch, and he’d taken away all the more provocative reading material that usually cluttered his coffee table. He’d left two behind - both tattoo magazines. He’d set his six person, dark wood-stained table up for an intimate dinner for two - with a vase of white roses and some flameless candles to set the mood. _This is date number three,_ he reminded himself as he left the kitchen to walk through the loft, double checking every detail. _After last weekend, and his I’m-still-not-ready speech, I think we both know what date number three means._

He stopped at one of the larger windows at the far end of the loft, the view of the ocean in the distance. _Three dates. It’s been awhile since I’ve had three dates with someone. I really thought he was going to be a one-off. . .but what happens after tonight? Usually people lose interest after the fucking is over. I thought he just wanted, well, I guess it doesn’t matter what I thought because it hasn’t been that way._

He shoved a hand lightly over his red-tipped mohawk as his thoughts landed on their last date - date number two. _I really thought we’d get down to it. We took a fuckin’ romantic stroll through the park. We looked at stars and he pointed out the fuckin’ big dipper. The big dipper. My jokes were on point. We held hands and fed the ducks. What’s with him? Why is he always taking me to do this weird stuff? Feeding ducks and eating ice cream and lying in the grass to look at stars? I did cop a good feel off him while we were stargazing though._ Chester licked his lips, his tongue smoothing over his lip ring as he remembered how they had started to make out under the stars. Mike’s kisses had captured him, and as hands explored on top of their clothes, it had been a signal to Chester that this was it. 

“And then nothing,” he grumbled as he pushed himself away from the window and strolled back across the loft, being careful to not trip on the gray shaggy rug that outlined the living room area from the dining room area, since it was one long space. He pulled his phone from his pocket, making sure he didn’t have any messages as he walked over to a glass shelf, which was mounted to the exposed brick wall that ran the length of the apartment, holding every window in the place. “Alexa,” he said, catching the ear of his smart speaker, “play _The Piano Guys_.” 

“Now playing songs by _The Piano Guys_ from Chester’s Spotify,” the smart speaker’s female voice responded before an instrumental piano/violin infused piece came on, the elegant music filling the apartment. 

Chester grinned. “Perfect.” He stood for a moment, listening to the song as he hummed along. He checked his watch - he had about five minutes before Mike was scheduled to arrive. He hopped toward the bathroom, pushing the barn door style door out of the way and stepping in. He looked himself over in the mirror - black button down shirt, pressed to perfection - check. White pants with the creases accentuating his small bottom and long legs - check. Just the right amount of eyeliner to make his brown eyes seductive - check. His favorite skull and crossbones black plugs in each earlobe - check. He looked down at his feet - his black and white Snoopy and Woodstock socks - check. He tugged at his black studded belt, pulling his pants away from his slender waist just enough to be able to see his Snoopy underwear with the black trim and the classic red doghouse right over his most treasured body part - check. 

He looked back in the mirror and smiled wide to show all his teeth as he inspected for any blemish or stray food item, but they looked pearly white - check!

“Alright, Sexy Boy Shinoda, you’re in for it tonight.” He chuckled at himself before he glanced over the bathroom one last time. The floors were clean, the toilet freshly scrubbed, the walk in shower sparkling. The granite countertop that matched the one in the kitchen was clear of clutter, just a small bottle of peach scented hand soap and and a gray and white hand towel hanging nearby. 

Chester nodded at himself in the mirror before he spun around and flipped the light off. The loft was bursting with the smell of chicken Parmesan and garlic bread now. Chester’s stomach rumbled as he made his way back toward the kitchen. He opened one of the white cabinets, his eyes eagerly searching for the bag of Gummy Bears he’d bought earlier in the week. Mike had mentioned on their last date - somewhere between feeding the ducks and when he stopped to take his flannel off to tie it around his waist - that he liked Gummy Bears, but hadn’t had them in a long while. 

Just as Chester spotted them behind the box of Cheez Its, he heard the doorbell ring. His whole body jumped, a cocktail of excited energy and horniness crashing through him as he looked toward the short hallway/entryway where his front door stood. He grinned, his eyes shooting across the loft apartment and over to the staircase on the far side that led up to his bedroom - a suspended platform with half walls that encaged his most personal space, a space he was eager to show Mike. _And I’ve got a surprise up there for him._ Chester chuckled to himself as he headed for the door. It had been three weeks. Three weeks since he’d first met Mike Shinoda, and he was beyond ready to explore something more physical with him. Every time they started up, Mike would pull the breaks, which was both confusing and frustrating, but as Chester opened the door, he didn’t care. He had Mike here now, and it was time to pull out all the charm he owned. 

Mike couldn’t wait to get inside Chester’s apartment. Already he was in awe of everything he’d seen, which was only the outside of the brick building, the downstairs lobby, and the inside of the elevator. Everything was sparkling and clean, and a far cry from the yellow siding and smell of old books that permeated his own place. He hadn’t even been inside the apartment yet, but everything about Chester’s building screamed successful adult - a status Mike had yet to achieve.

The fact that Chester hadn’t been joking when he told Mike he was mere blocks from the beach was a detail Mike noticed and adored as he’d driven over. In his mind there were already plans for a moonlit walk on the beach after dinner and before watching a movie, and he couldn’t wait. Nervous butterflies were swarming in his stomach as he walked down the corridor of robin’s egg blue doors and identical gray doormats, looking for apartment 602. It was the third date, and Mike thought of all that implied. Movie watching meant intimacy, and Mike was ready for a little more. He wanted to feel and taste a little more skin. He knew he was completely enthralled by Chester, and he wanted more than kisses. It felt safe enough with Chester now to let himself go a little. 

As he stood on the gray doormat and rang the bell, Mike glanced down at his outfit quickly, making sure nothing was amiss. Chester seemed to have at least accepted Mike’s propensity for flannels, and he’d selected tonight’s blue plaid carefully. It made the blue in his hair stand out a little more, and from the way Chester tugged at the strands when they kissed, Mike thought he might like his hair. His jeans were a more relaxed fit than he’d worn on their first two dates, and navy Converse completed the ensemble. It was the kind of staying-in-to-watch-a-movie attire Mike was most comfortable in, and as he waited for Chester to open the door, he hoped that he met the other man’s expectations. He wanted nothing more than for Chester to pull him into his arms as soon as he saw him. Dinner could get cold for all he cared at the moment. 

Chester wasn’t sure why he was surprised to see Mike standing in front of him in a flannel. Date number three, and this was flannel number three. But something inside Chester chuckled as he looked his date up and down. There was something more to this outfit, and Chester’s keen sense of style picked up on it right away - he matched. It wasn’t just a random flannel shirt and jeans. His blue shirt went well with his jeans, and his shoes - even though they were plain old sneakers - matched as well. His hair was styled to perfection, and of course he was smiling. Mike smiled a lot, and Chester liked that. “Hey,” Chester said, his hand going out, and before he knew it, he’d pulled the other man into his arms and had his lips on Mike’s in mere seconds. 

Mike felt himself melt into the kiss, bringing his hands up to cup gently around Chester’s neck and drawing him closer. It was exactly what he’d been thinking about on the drive over, and it was effortless. Everything about Chester’s warm mouth felt right, and he felt Chester’s arms pulling him closer, bringing their hips together right there in the middle of the doorway. Mike didn’t care. It always felt as though he couldn’t get enough, especially since he hadn’t allowed himself to cross many lines yet. _Tonight is going to be different._ As his fingers drifted over the back of Chester’s neck, he felt the other man shiver, and Mike smiled into their kiss. Even though he could smell something amazing cooking in Chester’s apartment, dinner was the last thing on his mind as he gently nibbled around the lip ring he’d grown to love.

Mike’s kiss was soft, but sure, just the way Chester liked it. It was going to be a good night, and Chester’s mind was already working forward as he pulled back and broke their kiss. “So,” he said, keeping close to Mike’s cheek, his breaths hot and short, “is your underwear blue too?” He was already smiling, anticipating the answer. 

With his lips next to Chester’s ear, Mike whispered, “I guess you’ll have to find out.”

Chester’s eyes popped open. Those were magic words right there. A challenge and permission to take things further. Chester grabbed Mike’s hand and pulled him into the apartment, shutting the door behind them. “This is my place,” he said absently as he waved quickly over his shoulder before his hands went right to Mike’s belt, his fingers badly trying to get it undone. “Don’t stop me,” he said, giggling as he struggled with the leather contraption that seemed to be mocking him. “I’m just going to look.” He glanced up, meeting Mike’s eyes, just to make sure he wasn’t about to get punched in the mouth. 

_So much for dinner. He’s going to undress me in the… living room?_ Mike glanced around the large space quickly before he focused in on Chester’s hands at his belt. His heart was racing already, and he wasn’t going to stop Chester just yet. There was a part of him that was enjoying the thrill of this unexpected moment, not knowing quite where it would lead. It didn’t matter that this night was already veering from the plan he’d set in his head earlier. One thing Mike knew he needed to learn was how to relax and let things happen sometimes. Which is why when Chester successfully unbuckled his belt, Mike didn’t move to stop him from fumbling with the button on his jeans.

Everything inside of Chester was racing. His pulse, his thoughts, his energy. His dick was already on its way to popping up and saying hello, as Chester unzipped Mike’s jeans. He took a breath, his tongue out as he rolled it across his lip ring. He peeled back the denim just enough to see the navy blue cotton boxer briefs, and Chester smiled. _Perfect. He’s learning to match. I love it._ He let go of Mike’s jeans and instead let one hand go up and around Mike’s neck, pulling him into another kiss. There was no need to make it deep, not now. It was a wet peck, with a tease of tongue before he pulled away again and took Mike’s hand. “Come on,” he said, nodding toward the open space, “I want to show you around and then we can continue this.” 

Mike bit down on his bottom lip as he trailed behind Chester, his free hand moving down to the top of his jeans and the waistband of his underwear for a moment. His pants weren’t going to fall off his hips or anything but he wasn’t sure if he should just walk around with his belt and button undone or not. _Does he think that’s sexy? God, I have to stop thinking so much._

He shoved the thought away and just left his jeans open a bit as he followed Chester around the apartment. It was impressive and as they stood and looked out the windows, Mike thought about how right he’d been. This would be a hell of a place to paint, with all the natural lighting. He was already in love with Chester’s place. “This is really amazing, Ches,” he said as he spied the ocean in the distance. “You’ve got an awesome view.”

“Thanks,” Chester said, his eyes grabbing a sideways view of his date, and how he hadn’t buckled his belt back. “When I moved out of my mom’s place, I wanted something close to the beach. Something where I felt like I could breathe. I like it here because it’s all one room,” he said, spinning around and opening his arms to show off the space. “My mom’s house is a bunch of little rooms. Bedroom, living room, dining room,” he said, ticking the mentions off on his fingers. “Rooms I’m not sure what they’re supposed to be for, and I’ve lived there my whole life.” He flashed Mike a half-smile before he went on. “But I didn’t want that. That kind of space feels, I don’t know,” he admitted with a shrug, “lonely. Here, I’m everywhere all the time. In the whole space. That probably sounds weird.” He dragged his hand over his red-tipped mohawk before he pointed up. “That’s my bedroom. It’s the only separated space, which I’m okay with. I don’t want just anyone up there.” 

Mike’s eyes skipped in the direction Chester pointed and his breath caught in his throat a little. _He’s going to take me up there, right? Are we… serious enough for him to want to show me his bedroom? Maybe he just wants to make out on the couch._ He looked in the direction of the sofa and decided that would probably be comfortable, too. But the secret upstairs bedroom - that was enticing. Mike wanted to see his private space, his sanctuary. If he was anything like Mike in that respect, it would tell him a lot more about Chester. “I know what you mean about the little rooms. Walls separate people, isolate them. This feels much more inviting.” He smiled as he looked around again, his eyes falling on all of Chester’s color-coordinated home decor. “You’ve got pretty good taste, too.” 

“Thanks,” Chester answered immediately. His stomach rumbled. He wanted to eat, but he also wanted to throw Mike down on the couch and continue what they’d started at the door. _Can’t scare him away. I’ve got him here now. Got do it all right. And. . .I want him to be comfortable. Us to be comfortable. God, I love his eyes. They’re so deep._ Chester took a swallow before he turned away and headed for the kitchen. “Come on, the food is ready, if you’re hungry?” He stopped halfway there, waiting to get an answer. The plan had been dinner and a movie, but Mike hadn’t said a word about either. No comment about the smell of chicken Parmesan or what movie they’d be watching later. And his pants were still undone, which is what Chester was now focusing on as Mike stood a good five feet away from him. 

“I’m always hungry,” Mike answered, his hands going to his jeans and belt and putting everything back in place quickly. He thought he saw a flicker of disappointment cross Chester’s face, but it was replaced with a grin as Mike stepped toward the kitchen. “Do you want help with anything?”

“Nope!” Chester was quick to say as he ushered Mike to the table. He pulled his chair out for him, and sat him down. “You’re my guest tonight,” he said, as he let his fingers trail over the back of Mike’s neck and around his ear, flipping the man’s earring for a second before he headed to the kitchen. “I’ve got everything ready. Relax, plus I’ve got a surprise for you.” He quickly looked over his shoulder; Mike was still at the table, his eyes watching closely. Chester opened a cabinet and pulled down a little glass dish that had engraving on the side. In his best ninja mode, he opened the bag of Gummy Bears and dumped them into the dish before he walked it over and sat it down in front of his date. “Dessert first while I get our plates ready.” 

With a goofy smile stretched across his face, Mike leaned forward and pulled the bowl toward him. “Dessert before dinner is so… _naughty_ ,” he said, his voice lingering over the last word. He popped a red one in his mouth and looked over at Chester, who was busily filling up dishes for them. “The red and white ones are the best, I always eat those first and then I’m disappointed. I should learn to pace myself better.” There was already a separation in the bowl - he’d moved red and white to one side, all the lesser flavors to the other. 

“I agree. I like the red ones,” Chester said as he walked around the island counter to the table and set both plates down. He stood up straight, looking at the food he’d made, and how it looked rather elegant. _Or as elegant as I’m going to get it._ “So, uh, you want a beer?” he asked, his hand going back to Mike’s neck, and up into the man’s blue hair, teasing just a little piece. They were both under 21, but Chester had his connections to get alcohol when he wanted it. “Or I’ve got water,” he offered quickly when Mike didn’t answer. “Or orange juice. Or milk. Or soda.” 

_Dessert before dinner, and beer… I’m just going to let things happen tonight._ “A beer sounds great,” he responded as he looked at his plate, feeling his empty stomach rumble. “You made this? I’m impressed. I’m not much of a cook yet, but I’m trying.” 

Since they’d met Mike had felt a little out of his league, but he wanted things to work between him and Chester so much more than anyone he’d ever dated before. It really felt like he needed to up his game a bit if he was going to keep Chester interested. He watched Chester make his way back to the refrigerator for the beer and Mike’s gaze couldn’t help but linger a bit on his perfect ass as he walked. It wasn’t just physical attraction that had Mike enthralled, though - Chester was the whole package. Worldly, successful, and gorgeous. And now Mike was sitting in his apartment, letting the other man take the lead, learning to relax and just enjoy himself. Everything about Chester was different than anyone he’d ever been with.

“Cooking is something I was kind of thrown into,” Chester said, as he handed Mike his beer and then he sat down across from him. He took a moment, eyeing his food before he picked up his knife and fork to cut up his chicken. “My dad passed away a few years ago, and my mom. . .” he stopped for a minute, his mind turning over how much he wanted to say. “She kinda stopped. Stopped everything. She stopped cleaning and stopped cooking. Stopped taking care of herself.” His fork was poised on his plate, but he wasn’t moving it. “So I had to pick up a lot of those things. She’s doing better now, which is why I felt it was okay to move out. I still see her almost everyday, just to make sure she’s keeping up with things and paying her bills. That sort of deal.” He looked up, meeting Mike’s eyes. 

There was something vulnerable in Chester’s expression as he spoke, and Mike’s heart melted just a little more. “You sound like a wonderful son,” he said after he swallowed his first bite of Chester’s delicious cooking. “I… I haven’t seen my parents in a while,” he admitted, spearing another piece of chicken and popping it in his mouth, unwilling to elaborate more at the moment. He really didn’t want to get into a whole discussion of his relationship with his parents, but he’d gone and opened his big mouth. Maybe if he kept eating Chester wouldn’t ask too many questions about them. 

Chester nodded as he swallowed down a bite of chicken. “I’m sorry,” he said, as he tried to gauge Mike’s reaction. He didn’t want to push. Whatever was between Mike and his parents, it didn’t seem like a good situation. “It’s hard when you don’t see each other. Do you talk them at all?” 

Mike looked up from his food and shrugged. “I’ve only spoken to them once since they moved to Colorado and basically put me out on my own after high school. It’s how I ended up with Anna, and it’s been tough. L.A. isn’t a cheap place to live on your own. I’m lucky she needed a roommate and luckier I have something I’m good at to help pay the bills.” He looked around the apartment again and sighed. “I guess it could have been different if I’d gone on to college the way they wanted me to, but I just wasn’t sure yet. I’m still not.” With a wave of his hand, Mike dismissed the entire subject. “But I don’t want to talk about all that stuff right now. Thinking about my parents just…” he stopped, a bit overwhelmed at the emotions that bubbled up at the thought of the parents he’d loved so much basically abandoning him. “I just don’t want to talk about them.”

Chester watched Mike drop his head. His voice had had more than a hint of bitterness to it. Whatever had happened between Mike and his parents was obviously a huge weight on his shoulders. Chester glanced around his apartment - at the nice view and the clean open space that was all his. He didn’t have a roommate or a cramped space. He didn’t live in a poor neighborhood. He had the opposite of all of that. “Damn,” he whispered, shaking his head back and forth. “You must think I’m a total snob, don’t you?” 

Mike’s head shot up as he said, “no! God, no! I mean, you work for what you have, I could never hold being successful against someone. If you’re doing your job well, you should be rewarded for that. You happen to have found something a bit more lucrative than piano lessons.” He smiled wryly. “I’ll find something like that someday too.”

Chester looked away from him. His appetite was suddenly not what it had been. He pushed his plate away and took his beer instead. “You’re doing something you love. Something good, you know?” he said, finally looking up to make eye contact. “You’re teaching kids and making a difference. That’s better than what . . .I mean, you shouldn’t give that up for money. I know that’s easy for someone to say who isn’t struggling as much, and now I sound like an ass.” He clamped his mouth shut and looked away. _What the hell is wrong with me? Is it possible for me to say all the wrong things in one night?_ “I’m sorry,” he apologized again. “I don’t know why we’re even talking about this.” 

“Hey, don’t worry about it,” Mike said, reaching out to cover Chester’s hand with his own. “I’m not judging you for being in a better place than I am. If anything, I worry about you thinking… God, it sounds stupid, but,” he took a deep breath and plunged ahead, “I keep thinking you’ll realize I’m not good enough for you, or something.” He laced Chester’s fingers through his and thought about how natural they looked together, and hoped that he hadn’t said the wrong thing. Vulnerability wasn’t sexy, not to most guys.

Chester’s eyes zeroed in on the way Mike was holding his fingers, how his skin was soft and accepting. Loving. Comforting. _Not good enough. I’m the one that’s not good enough._ He shut his eyes and sent the thought away. This was going nowhere good. He had to snap out of this if they were going to have any fun. He let out a long breath before he pushed a smile. “I think maybe we fall under that old saying, ‘opposites attract’. And I kind of like that. I have to admit that when I saw you in karate class, I thought you were cute, but I had no idea we’d end up on three dates. Speaking of which,” he said as he unlaced their fingers so he could skim a digit over the back of Mike’s hand and up to his wrist, “when you get done eating, I’ve got a surprise for you.” 

The feel of Chester’s finger lightly touching him, poking up under the sleeve of his flannel and tracing circles on his wrist, made Mike forget about food. Somewhere in the back of his mind he figured he’d had enough, that he’d live another day, and so that was plenty. As he watched the finger disappear under his sleeve, he said, “I’m finished. And I love surprises.” When Chester looked up at him, the corners of his eyes crinkled in a smile, Mike couldn’t help but add, “don’t make me wait,” with a little flip at the end of his sentence. The mood had already lightened up and Mike was ready for what was next.

Chester pushed his chair back. “Come on, then,” he said, not bothering to second guess Mike’s statement of being full. “It’s upstairs.” He winked Mike’s way as he offered his hand, and a second later they were hand in hand on their way to the staircase that led to Chester’s lofted bedroom space. The stairs were a bit narrow, but it didn’t stop Chester’s steps from quickening as they were almost at the top. He’d been planning this moment all week, and even though they weren’t getting here in exactly the fashion or order he’d thought, he was more than excited to bring Mike into his private space. 

Inside his head, Mike’s thoughts were a swirling mess. _He’s taking me upstairs. He said he doesn’t bring just anyone up here. Is that true or is that just a line? How far am I willing to go tonight? I want this, I want him, but I’m nervous. At some point I’ll find out this is all just a dream, right? Oh, I don’t want this to just be a dream._ As they stepped into the loft, Mike caught his breath and looked around.

It wasn’t a massive space, but it was bigger than his bedroom at home, that was for sure. The floors up here weren’t the same polished dark cement like downstairs, they looked more like hardwood. The half-walls made the room feel private, even though you could see over the top of them, and Mike could still hear the music playing softly from downstairs, though it was muffled from where he was standing. There was a flat screen television mounted on one wall and a double closet doors on the other, and Mike could only imagine how many rows of clothes and shoes must be in there. But it was the bed that stole his attention. 

Chester walked over to stand next to it, his face covered in a cocky smile. “Well,” he said, holding back the little laugh that wanted to flow out with his words, “what do you think?” He motioned over the new bed set he’d bought earlier in the week - a red and black flannel patterned blanket with matching sheets and pillow cases. 

With his hand outstretched, Mike stepped forward to run his hand over the blanket. It was soft and comforting, just like his favorite shirts, and the thought that Chester might have gotten this particular blanket just to please him calmed his nerves a bit. “I didn’t think you were into flannel,” he said as he touched the blanket, wondering if he had anything to do with it being there.

“I’m not,” Chester said. “But I was out shopping the other day and saw this and thought of you.” He shrugged his shoulders. “Cheesy, I know, but, uh, I thought you’d get a kick out of it, and I needed a new sheet set anyway.” 

_He bought this because it reminded him of me. And I love it._ That was all it took for Mike to close the space between them, sliding his hands around Chester’s waist and squeezing his sides. “I think it’s great,” he said, not wanting to be overly enthusiastic. “I’ll bet you’ve slept well ever since you brought it home.” He leaned forward, running the tip of his nose down Chester’s neck, inhaling the scent of the beach and peaches, and the smell of the chicken parmesan from dinner, and he knew he wanted to feel those sheets on his skin. “You smell amazing,” he whispered.

Chester’s limbs tingled. If this wasn’t Mike offering to take everything up a notch, then what was? It was the green light Chester had been waiting for. He resisted the urge to kiss Mike in that moment, and instead he said, “Get on the bed.” He pointed toward the middle of the mattress. “Lay on your back, I’ve got something else for you.” 

It took every ounce of trust Mike had in him to toe off his shoes and follow directions, scooting into the middle of the bed. It wasn’t exactly how he’d imagined things, but it was the theme of the night. Relax and let things happen. 

Chester watched. He stood back and took in every second of Mike clumsily getting his shoes off and then climbing onto the bed. “I love your ass,” Chester said, his giddy grin consuming his face. “Have I told you that yet?”

From his nest in the middle of the bed, Mike grinned, already feeling more relaxed. “I think I might have picked up on that when you couldn’t keep your hands off it last week at the park.” He stretched a little bit and looked up at Chester, waiting.

“What can I say?” Chester said with a sheepish shrug. “I’m an ass man. Always have been. Now, don’t move,” he instructed as he rounded the bed to get to the half-wall on the other side. He stood up on his tiptoes, both hands on the ledge as he yelled, “Alexa! Stop!” the piano music from before suddenly turned off. “Alexa! Play Chester’s Sexy Dancing Playlist!” 

A second later the device repeated the name of the playlist and music came back on - sensual sounds and a smooth voice. Chester hollered for his smart speaker to turn it up, and now it could clearly be heard in the loft space. “Now,” Chester said as he turned around to see Mike watching him intently, “you ready for some fun?” 

****

TBC


	5. Mutual Satisfaction

The music was unexpected, and Mike didn’t know what to say, so he simply nodded as he leaned up on both elbows to get a better view. _Is he… is he about to dance for me? I don’t even know what to think about that. I bet his ass looks good dancing though._ Mike kept his eyes on Chester, wondering if this was going to be dancing or a striptease. 

Chester had his eyes fixed on his target. Mike was there, on his bed and looking more than interested. Chester could already feel his heart reving up and his cock wasn’t far behind it. He made his way to the front of the bed, his mind shutting off as he let the music and the excitement of the moment take over. 

His hips were the first to start sliding back and forth. He had his hands over his head, as he went from one side to the other, as he bent over and raised himself back up slowly. He had his fingers on the buttons of his shirt, ticking them open one at time. There was no need to talk. There was no need to make conversation as the music and lyrics filled that space. 

Chester had his shirt open, but he left it on as he leaned forward on the bed, his ass still swinging slightly as he reached forward and touched Mike’s foot, teasing his toes for a moment. 

Instantly Mike felt his pants grow a bit tighter. He wasn’t sure what to make of Chester’s sexy dancing, but the moment he’d touched Mike’s foot, electricity shot through his body. He’d never thought he liked having his feet touched, but maybe it was just Chester, the way his body was moving and the confident gleam in his eyes. _I’m going to be in over my head real fast if he keeps this up._ Even though he’d convinced himself before he had arrived that they still weren’t going to have sex, it felt like everything was pointing that direction, and Mike was anxious and horny at the same time. Chester knew exactly what he was doing, and Mike had no idea what to do next.

Chester licked his lips, letting his tongue go nice and slow before he pulled back and stood up straight, leaving Mike’s feet alone for the moment. He turned around, leaving his back to the bed as he continued to sway. He let his black shirt fall from his shoulders, and then down his arms, until it dropped to the floor. He bent forward, throwing his ass into the air in Mike’s direction. 

He wrapped one arm around behind himself, letting his fingers trail over his own ass cheek before he stood up and turned around. His nipples were hard, and so was his dick, which was now screaming at him. He kept the moving up, letting his thin frame slink up, down, and from one corner of the bed to the other before he got his belt undone. He whipped it out from the belt loops and tossed it off to the side. 

He stopped for a moment, letting his chest rise and fall as he stared at Mike watching him. “How you doin’ over there, Sexy Boy?”

One of Mike’s hands made its way down the front of his shirt to his jeans, and he pressed his palm flat against his dick as he watched Chester with heavy eyes. There was no denying he was turned on, and there was no reason to pretend otherwise. He wanted to touch Chester, feel all the skin his eyes were feasting on, and the anticipation was killing him. “I’m great,” Mike panted, his voice coming out much more breathless than he’d hoped. “But I’m feeling a little lonely over here.” With his free hand he patted the space on the bed next to him, waiting for Chester to give up his teasing and get over there.

“Lonely is always bad,” Chester said. “I’m coming.” He flashed Mike a smile before he undid his pants and slipped out of them, leaving him standing in just his Snoopy and Woodstock socks, and his matching underwear - the red dog house in the crotch looking badly misshapen from his erection that had no issue showing itself. 

Chester jumped up on the bed, his feet hitting the mattress as he took a step forward and stood overtop his date. He licked his lips again as he looked down on Mike and the excitement that was clearly visible in his eyes, on his face, and his hand that was still stroking the front of his jeans. “I’m here,” Chester said, making sure to let his hips sway just a little. 

“Come on down here then,” Mike said, his voice raspy with desire. “I can’t reach you.” He had far too much clothing on by comparison, and he was ready to lose some of it, even if his plain blue underwear was nowhere near as exciting as Chester’s. He was ready to know what their skin felt like pressed together. He was ready for more, and Chester was teasing him now, a shift from their other dates.

“You got it,” Chester said. His impulse was to drop down, and help Mike get out of his flannel and, of course, the white undershirt he knew was hiding underneath that, but he didn’t. It was time to let his date take some control, time to make sure the playing field was even. Chester had done everything to set the stage, and he was ready for Mike to continue to give him the go ahead. After being rejected over the course of their last two dates, something like caution had cropped up into Chester’s mind when it came to the physical side of his dealings with Mike. Despite the heat between them - the natural heat that drove Chester insane - Mike had always been the one to stop things. 

Chester took a step to the side, and laid down next to his date, on his side. He had one arm shoved up under the pillow, the other free as it roamed down his naked chest, and over the front of his underwear. The sensation of his own touch was enough for him to close his eyes and pull in every bit of the building tension. The good tension that made everything feel incredible. 

Turning on his side to face Chester, Mike felt his pulse quicken at the sudden proximity. He couldn’t keep himself from running a hand down Chester’s arm, then feathering his fingers across his chest. He was drawn to him, and he leaned over to capture those perfect lips with his own, wasting no time sliding his tongue across the lip ring and into Chester’s warm mouth. Pressing his lower half closer, Mike felt Chester’s hand between them and he reached for Chester’s wrist, turning his hand over and placing it boldly on his aching dick. It felt good, even through the heavy denim, and Mike moaned as he broke away from their kiss for a moment. “Ches, I… you can… what you were doing before, you can take my belt off,” he managed, his face flushing slightly. 

Chester’s eyes slid open as he kept his face close to Mike’s. “You sure?” he asked, before he mentally slapped himself. _Are you sure? What the hell is wrong with me? I take that back. Yes, he’s sure._ He hesitated for a second, his hand breaking from between them, and was now resting on Mike’s hip. Normally he would have happily rolled the other man over and stripped him right down, pulling each piece of clothing off with the aid of his teeth and a grin, but with all the stops and starts that had been between them so far, he wanted to make sure. And now he had to wait for an answer, even as he cursed himself for being too cautious in a moment like this. 

Mike was sure. Everything in his body was on go mode, and he wanted to get closer to Chester. “Yeah, I’m sure,” he whispered, his eyes closed, his heart pounding in his ears. He wanted to feel Chester’s fingers wrapped around him, and there were too many layers preventing that. “Go ahead.”

Chester sat up. He leaned down, snuggling his face to Mike’s for a minute before he gently pushed him on the shoulder, getting Mike onto his back. Chester went to work, undoing the belt and after some maneuvering, and Mike’s help with a lift here and there, he got the belt free, and the heavy jeans down and off, leaving Mike in his blue boxer briefs.

Chester went to climb right on top of him, his need to rub their body parts together rushing through him like a freight train, but he thought better of it, as Mike’s fingers slid up and down his arm. Instead he laid back down on his side, and his hand was on Mike’s hip again, pressing around the waistband of his underwear. “If you want that flannel off,” he said, feathering his fingers down the front of Mike’s crotch, “you’re going to have to do it yourself. Too many buttons for me, and then there’s that undershirt,” he made sure to say with a sly twitch to his lips. His hand was on Mike now, caressing the hidden erection that was already leaking, already leaving a damp feeling on Chester’s fingertips when he touched it in just the right place. 

“Unnngh,” Mike groaned, trying to unbutton the cuffs of his shirt but distracted by the feel of Chester’s hand on him, one less layer of clothing between them. It was suddenly too hot for flannel, and he wanted the shirt off, but it was hard to make the buttons cooperate with Chester’s fingers stroking him. Struggling halfway upright for a moment, he managed to unbutton and pull off the shirt, tossing it away and leaving him in his safe white t-shirt. He wasn’t 100% sure he was ready to lose that one yet, and it didn’t really matter at the moment. Chester’s fingers were dipping below the waistband of his boxer briefs, and that was infinitely more important.

“Much better,” Chester said as he lifted his hand to tug on Mike’s shirt. He pulled the other man back to him, and with Mike back on his side, it was time to keep going. Chester shoved his hand up under the back of Mike’s shirt, rubbing his fingers over every bit of skin he could get to - warm skin that Mike was still hiding from him for some reason. He wrapped one leg over Mike’s and pulled his lower half up against him, letting their hidden dicks make contact. It felt good, and as Chester kissed his way around Mike’s ear and neck, sucking in the smell of coconut from his hair, he was well past the point of being turned on.

It was a lot to take in for Mike, the feel of their bodies pressed together, Chester’s warm lips making contact with the sensitive spot behind his ear that made his toes curl. Wrapping one arm around Chester’s back, his hand drifted down to cup around one ass cheek, returning the pressure being applied from Chester’s leg. He turned into Chester’s wandering lips, meeting the moist heat of his mouth and delving in deep, his stomach twisting in anticipation as their tongues met urgently. Every part of his body was tingling under Chester’s touch, and Mike was craving just a little bit more. He was ready. He wanted to let go, to drown in the sensation of Chester’s hands and mouth and his cock that was so insistently pressing against his own.

Chester heard himself moan. A real moan, not one he faked for the benefit of anyone else. His mind was a bit dizzy as his hormones rushed through him, up his legs and stampeding through his lower parts. This was real, and it was happening, and so far Mike was allowing it. 

He pulled his hand out from under Mike’s shirt, and after backing himself up a little, he went back to massaging Mike through the front of his underwear. He let his own dick bump up against his working hand a few times, just to get the friction. The pleasure. And then it was time for more. He moved his attention to the top of Mike’s waistband, and without asking permission, he slid his fingers under it, feeling the prickle of Mike’s pubic hair, and soft skin. Everything about him was warm, and a second later he felt the top of Mike’s cock. He touched the shaft first, his knowing fingers caressing the ridges and shape before he let them flirt with the head, which was smashed into the cloth of the briefs that were keeping it locked away. 

There was no stopping now, even if Mike had wanted to. He had given himself over to the feel of Chester’s hand on his dick, and it was glorious. But he knew it could be better, and he wiggled his hips impatiently, reaching down to help move his underwear out of the way. As he lifted his hips it increased the pressure of Chester’s hand on him, and he chanted out, “oh, God, yes, Chester,” his head falling back into the sheets as he kicked the offending underwear away. For a brief moment he felt his self consciousness rear its ugly head, but he shoved it away. Chester’s hand felt too good.

The view of Mike’s dick on full display - and fully erect - was one that Chester sucked in immediately. He watched his hand rub Mike from top to bottom, letting the pressure of his fingers and palm squeeze here and lessen there. Chester was no stranger to the workings of the penis, and as he teased Mike’s head, adding enough force right around the rim, and then over his slit, he heard Mike say his name again. _He’s going to cum. He’s not going to last._ Chester kept going, figuring this would be step one. . .maybe step five. . .in their night of exploits. He raised his head long enough to kiss Mike on his lips and chin before he pulled his hand away and said, “Hang on, Sexy Boy, I’ll get something to help.” He sat up and turned over to get to the little nightstand by the bed. He opened the drawer and pulled out a bottle of lube. 

“It’s worth the wait,” he said, eyeing Mike’s impatient stare, like Chester had gotten up and left the room or something, not just reached over to the nightstand. He had to chuckle as he squirted some in his hand, lacing it over his fingers and palm and then he laid back down, returning to their previous position. He slicked his hand over Mike’s penis, coating every inch of it before he curled his hand all the way around the shaft and started to pump his hand, his lips moving to kiss up and under Mike’s chin, and down his neck, sucking in his smell, his heat, his need. “I got you,” he whispered. 

Mike felt it coming, the orgasm that Chester was pulling out of him, starting from the tension in his legs that kept building as he stroked him, perfectly, as though it were not their first time. He knew it wouldn’t take much more for him to shoot cum everywhere, and he reached down with the last bit of cognizant thought he had, sliding his hand up under the edge of his t-shirt and moving it up and out of the way. Turning his face toward Chester, Mike gasped for air as he hit the edge, feeling his whole body freeze for a moment before he went blindly over the cliff, Chester’s name on his lips as he felt his body quake almost violently, as he came all over Chester’s hand and his stomach. It didn’t last nearly long enough, but when he opened his eyes, Mike felt sleepy, heavy, and completely satisfied. _That was… wow. Damn._

“Damn, Ches,” he breathed, “I… that...” He reached over to kiss him when words failed, hoping to explain himself better through actions than words. It was a sweet, simple kiss before Mike fell back into the sheets, gazing at Chester and thinking about what his expectations might be. In a moment he’d be ready to find out, but right now his body was still reeling from what might have been the best orgasm he’d ever been given.

“Glad you liked that,” Chester said through his smile. He was more than thrilled that he’d been able to get Mike off so quickly, so completely. He could see it in his eyes - that look of far off thoughts and a numb mind. Chester’s body was still ready to go, still waiting for the return, but he figured he’d give Mike a minute. Besides, he needed to clean up first. 

He pecked Mike on the cheek before he sat up, his dick screaming at him for the harsh movement, and he winced a little. He looked down at his hand - it had that dry sticky feeling from where the lube wasn’t luby anymore, and shots of Mike’s cum that were little blobs all over his hand. He grabbed his shirt from the floor and quickly wiped everything off, including what had strayed onto the bed, and the little drip on Mike’s stomach. 

“Now,” Chester said, tossing the soiled shirt back to the floor. “I’m ready for more.” He pet his hand down Mike’s side, sliding it over his exposed belly and up his chest, where he outlined the other man’s darker nipples, one at time.

Chester leaned in, taking Mike’s kiss as he trailed his hand over his ribs and around his back before he slid it all the way down. His fingers went to work, pulling one of Mike’s legs toward him, to open up the space between his ass cheeks. He was ready to get to something more, and Mike was letting him do it. The lube was still on the bed, and Chester’s mind was planning out each step. First some finger play, then they would switch up some positions. 

The foggy bliss lifted from Mike’s mind enough for him to realize where things were headed, and his hand shot out to grab Chester’s wrist as he pulled away from the kiss. In a panic, he said, “wait - wait a minute,” as he tried to get his brain to cooperate enough to string together words. Everything was still relaxed and fuzzy at the edges, and Mike could feel Chester’s hard cock against his thigh and hear his heavy breaths in his ear. He realized he’d made a critical error with Chester, and there was something he needed to say.

“I, um,” he started again, feeling his cheeks burn red as he looked up into Chester’s eyes. “Chester… I… don’t think I’m quite ready for that just yet.”

The hard smack of sudden rejection hit Chester hard as he backed up a little, the look in Mike’s eyes confusing. “Not ready?” He asked, his mind tumbling down the hill toward hurt feelings, even as he tried to put the breaks on. “Not ready for what? We just got you off without any issue,” he said, pointing to Mike’s now deflated cock. “Are you. . .I mean, do you not want to keep going?” He hated how weak his voice sounded on that last question, and dropped his eyes to the bed. 

“I want to make you feel good,” Mike said as he watched Chester carefully, “but I don’t… I mean, I’ve never… um…” This was so much harder to say when they were both so close to naked, and Mike wished he could go back and have this conversation from the safety of his flannel shirt and jeans. He squeezed his eyes shut and forced himself to mumble, “I’ve never actually had sex before.”

Chester’s eyes narrowed as he sat up, everything inside of him dropping down a few notches from the sexual height it had been suspended at. “What?” He shook his head, his eyes running up and down Mike’s body - his legs and exposed private parts, and his belly. It didn’t make any sense. Mike was nineteen. Or had he been lying about his age? A million thoughts flooded Chester’s head. What if he’s underage? What if. . .no, he couldn’t think like that. Instead he shut his eyes for a moment. _A virgin_. He’d never actually been with a virgin before. He turned back to look at Mike, who looked like a scared rabbit in headlights. “Really?” he asked, because that was the only word that would come out. 

Mike tugged at his shirt hem, trying to cover himself a little, his eyes still tightly shut. He wanted to die right there. Was being a virgin at his age really that bad? “Really,” he breathed out, wishing it weren’t true. “It’s not like I haven’t… done stuff, obviously, but the rest has just never felt right.” He finally opened his eyes to gauge Chester’s reaction better. He knew it was the wrong time to tell Chester that intimacy really meant something to him, and that he’d really just been waiting for the right person. It was enough to have come clean at this point, and maybe, _maybe_ Chester would be understanding. 

Sitting up to match Chester’s position, he reached a hand tentatively between them, his palm making contact with the warm skin of Chester’s neck. “I want you to feel the way you made me feel, and there’s other ways to do that, you know. It doesn’t _have_ to be sex, not yet.” He tried his best puppy dog eyes in Chester’s direction, hoping he hadn’t totally screwed everything up. 

The feel of Mike’s hand on his neck was nice. He had a nice touch, a nice kiss. A nice body. And the list could go on and on as Chester looked over, catching Mike’s big brown eyes. And that was it. Chester smiled at him. “I’m game,” he said. “Go ahead, tell me about these other ways you have in mind.” 

Mike being a virgin would have to be something they crossed some other time, if there was another time. If Mike hadn’t wanted to go all the way with anyone yet, Chester wasn’t sure if he would be a candidate for that or not. But it didn’t matter. Not right now, and not right here. 

The worry lifted from Mike’s stomach and he half smiled, half bit his bottom lip as he wiggled closer to Chester, sliding his hand down from his neck, across his stomach, and landing right on the doghouse printed on Chester’s underwear. He leaned close and put his lips right on Chester’s ear and breathed, “I could suck you off.”

Chester’s cock jumped up in support of that idea. “I’d never turn that offer down,” Chester said as he turned his head, his lips brushing over Mike’s for a minute. “I’m sorry I freaked a little. I just. . .wasn’t, I mean, it was a surprise.” He shut his eyes. _We need to be safe. I need to make sure I keep him safe. God, a virgin. If I gave him something, I’d never forgive myself. I’m clean. I know I am. But still. . .I’ve got condoms. I wonder if he’ll question that?_

Mike was lightly stroking over Chester’s still covered penis, and kissing his way down the pale column of his neck and across his collarbone before he realized he hadn’t really been intending to take this so far tonight, and he wasn’t exactly prepared for the moment. There was no way he could just throw caution to the wind and just do this without protection, and as he kissed back up the other side of Chester’s neck, he asked, “do you have a condom?”

Chester’s body stiffened a little as he looked over. “I do,” he answered, his concern over what might have been an awkward conversation leaving completely. “Hang on.” He twisted around, grabbed his bottle of lube and tossed it back in the drawer. _Won’t need that anymore tonight._ He shoved around the other contents of the drawer, as he laid stretched across the bed. “Here we go,” he announced as he turned back to Mike, a handful of little square packages in his hand. “I’ve got different colors and I think some of these are actually flavored.” He tossed Mike a wily grin as he held them out to let his date pick which one he wanted. 

A foil packet with orange lettering caught Mike’s eye, and he plucked it from Chester’s hand. “This one,” he said, reading the words, “it’s peach flavored.” 

He watched Chester toss the unselected packets back in the drawer and slam it shut. “Come over here,” Mike said, patting the edge of the bed as he slid off, thinking he’d rather be on his knees than hovering over Chester’s body for however long it might take. He grabbed Chester’s hand and pulled him off the bed with him, then hooked his fingers over the waistband of the Snoopy underwear to inch them down.

“Let me,” Chester whispered, kissing Mike on the ear, before he stepped totally out of his underwear, flinging them out of the way. He took the foil packet from Mike’s hand and in seconds he had it opened, and was fitting it down and around his erection, the tightness squeezing him a bit much, but sending a pulse of pleasure through him at the same time. “Tell me, Sexy Boy, where do you want me? Right here? Somewhere else?” 

“Here’s good,” Mike said as he skimmed his hands down Chester’s sides, tracing over his smooth skin before he gently pushed him back down on the edge of the bed. _I hope I can make him feel as good as I felt._ He dropped down to his knees and kissed the inside of one of Chester’s thighs, running his hand up the back of his calf. It wasn’t entirely comfortable on the hardwood flooring of Chester’s bedroom, but he’d already been needy enough for the night. Just as he was settling in to get going, he felt Chester tug gently at his hair, and he looked up to see him holding a pillow out.

“That floor is hard,” he said, pushing the pillow Mike’s way. “Put your knees on this.” 

Taking the pillow, Mike arranged himself on the cushion, his heart warming from the concern Chester was showing him. _He cares if I’m comfortable._ He looked up and he ran his hands over Chester’s thighs, delighting in the way Chester’s lips were parted, his tongue toying with his lip ring as he watched, and Mike curled a hand around the base of his cock, giving it a little stroke just before he went in for the kill.

The peach flavored condom was something new, and Mike didn’t dislike it as he slid his mouth carefully down the shaft of Chester’s dick, not going too far just yet, before backing off with a little squeeze of his lips around the head. He didn’t want to go too fast, he wanted to build the pressure up and really have Chester squirming under his touch. _It doesn’t have to be sex to be good._ Down he went again, feeling the weight of Chester’s cock heavy against his tongue as he sucked lightly and stroked his hand, matching the movement of his mouth. His free hand rested on Chester’s thigh for a moment as Mike experimented with the pressure and the suction, trying to figure out what Chester liked. 

A few sucks in, and Chester leaned back, one hand braced behind him, his other into the depths of Mike’s blue hair. He could feel his balls tingling with building tension. It was stacking up quickly, and Chester’s eyes were shut as he let it take him. His legs spread a little further apart, as his fingers dug a little deeper into the sheets behind him. “Fucccck,” he slurred soflty, his hips bucking a little as he tried to hold it back. It would have been easy to let it go, but he wanted it to build, and Mike’s swirling tongue and hot mouth was pulling him closer every second. 

The way Chester said ‘fuck’ made Mike want to hear more. His hand snaked over to carefully cup Chester’s balls, gently sliding them around in his palm as he went deeper, as far down as he could go, increasing the suction as he pulled up before diving back for more. It was a game now - how long could he keep this up before Chester couldn’t hold out any longer? A brief thought of what Chester tasted like flitted across his mind and he hoped one day he’d find out as he continued trying to give the best blow job Chester had ever had. 

Feeling Mike’s hands on his balls sent something extra through Chester’s insides. It was a mix of uncomfortable, and un-fucking believable. It was a tender place, and yet Mike managed it well. Chester’s mouth was open now, his breathing heavy as his legs tensed against the side of the bed. He opened his eyes to see the ceiling fan that was above them, lazilly spinning. “Mike,” he breathed, his fingers gripping the other man’s hair before he latched more onto his skull. “Mike,” he said again as his eyes closed. “I’m. . .I’m there.” And that was it. A long moan followed, with Chester’s tongue coming out as he felt his release hit him in bolts of two and then three, like pulses on the inside. It was a mad rush, water breaking through the stronghold, and then it was over, as everything started to calm down. 

Chester’s toes uncurled a little, his legs pressed so hard against the side of the bed loosened and he opened his eyes to see the blurry fan over his head. “My god,” he whispered before he sat himself up straight, the arm he’d been leaning on aching as he relieved it. 

Mike couldn’t help but smile as he sat back slightly on his heels, resting his forehead against the inside of Chester’s leg. From his perspective, it seemed as though he’d done a good job, and as he’d gently released Chester’s cock from his mouth, carefully holding the base of the condom, he’d heard the sigh of contentment from the other man. That was always a sure sign of a job well done. Chester’s hand was still stroking his hair and Mike was sucking up the tenderness he felt in that touch.

“That was, that was. . .” Chester couldn’t even come up with something to say. He could say any number of cheesy lines he’d used a hundred times, but that didn’t seem right. Not here. Not with Mike. Instead he leaned down and kissed the top of Mike’s blue hair. “Let me go clean up,” he said, “and then we can finish those beers downstairs and pig out on Gummy Bears.” 

Mike looked up and thought about beer and Gummy Bears, and realized his heart just wasn’t in that place. All he wanted to do was crawl up in the center of Chester’s soft bed and lay his head on the other man’s chest and watch that movie they’d talked about. As he stood up, his hand felt out toward the blanket, and he glanced at Chester. “Or, we could just lie here and watch that movie,” he suggested timidly, unsure what the typical protocol was after Chester’s trysts.

“We can watch the movie downstairs,” Chester said as he went to get up. His back was stiff, and he was ready to get the full condom off his shrinking penis. “Let’s get dressed,” he said side-stepping his date, “and I gotta go take care of this.” He nodded down, and he watched Mike’s eyes follow his nod in recognition before he took a few steps away from the bed, and pulled the condom off with an uncomfortable snap. _Hate this part._ He kept it in one hand, not wanting to toss it in the trashcan up here. That’s what the bathroom was for. He grabbed his underwear and his pants, and then he was gone, down the stairs. 

Feeling a little bewildered, Mike looked around the floor for his clothes, locating his underwear and pants, and his flannel shirt in a heap beside the bed. He tossed the pillow up on the bed and gazed at it longingly as he pulled on his clothes, taking his time to button up his shirt. He really just wanted to cuddle, and it didn’t seem like Chester was into that. _Maybe I didn’t do as good of a job as I thought I did._

He slowly descended the stairs, his thoughts skipping around trying to figure out what was happening with him and Chester. This was where things always got weird, where he realized things meant more to him than the other person. This was what always disappointed him about anyone he’d been intimate with. How was Chester going to act in the aftermath? 

Chester came out of the bathroom, feeling clean and fresh now. He’d relieved himself, washed his hands, patted some water on his face, and even though he didn’t have a shirt on, he was back in his Snoopy underwear and white pants. He instructed his smart speaker to stop, and the apartment went quiet. He trotted across the room, grabbing his beer from the table and taking a drink. _Yuk. Warm beer._ He turned his nose up at it before he grabbed Mike’s bottle and took them both to the sink to get rid of them. 

“Mike!” he hollered over his shoulder. 

From his place on the couch, Mike didn’t know if he was supposed to follow Chester or simply answer him. He settled for saying, “yeah?”

“What do you want to drink? The beers went warm, so no go. Trust me, they’re gross now.” 

“A glass of water is fine,” Mike replied, his voice sounding a little off to his own ears. He was trying hard to keep the disappointment out of his tone, and he knew he was probably overreacting, but it was hard. He didn’t like not knowing where he stood. 

Chester was humming as he rummaged around the kitchen. He took down two glasses and after filling them with ice and water from the door of his refrigerator, the joined Mike on the couch. But then he sprang right back to his feet, leaving his glass on the coffee table. “Oh, come here,” he said, waving for Mike to follow him as he headed for one of the windows. “I want to show you something first.” 

Mike joined him, and Chester pointed, “Look, it’s twilight ocean view,” he said, a confident smile hitting his lips. “The stars and setting sun light it up. I think I like it better now than during the middle of the day.” 

Looking out over the ocean, Mike had to agree. It was breathtaking, and in his mind he took a snapshot of it to remember this night by… in the event this was the only time he ever got to see the view from this apartment. He looked sideways at Chester, at his tattoos that were no longer hidden by his shirt, and felt his heart pinch. He wanted more than just a casual fling. He wanted a real relationship with Chester, and he had no idea how to even bring it up, so he just sighed and looked back out the window at the reflection of the dying light on the water.

Chester looked over, catching the solemn look on Mike’s face. His smile dropped. “What’s wrong?” 

It was the second time in the span of just a few hours that Mike felt vulnerable and anxious. He didn’t want to sound needy but he really felt something between them, something more, and he needed to know if Chester felt it too. “Nothing’s wrong. Well, I mean, not really. I’m just in my own head I guess.” He turned away from the window, meeting Chester’s concerned eyes, and dropped his gaze to the floor. “I really, really enjoyed what we just did,” he started, feeling the heat creeping up his cheeks. “And I… feel like… maybe, that there’s something a little more there, something more with _us._ ” 

Mike was really struggling with the words now, but it was too important to him not to say anything. He couldn’t go home miserable, not knowing. He blew out a deep breath before he looked up from the floor. “I mean… are we boyfriends now?”

Chester took a step back. “Boyfriends?” he asked, his insides screeching to a halt. “I, well, um. . .what’s your definition of _boyfriends_?” 

Of all the reactions he could have anticipated, Chester wanting a definition of boyfriends was not one of them. He brought a hand up to rub at the back of his neck before he tugged at an earring. “Well… I don’t do that with just anyone,” Mike said pointedly, his eyes lifting to the loft above. “I… it actually means something to me. I mean, don’t freak out, I’m not saying I’m in love or anything,” he said hurriedly, his hands going out in front of him as he shook his head, “but I know I don’t want to do that with anyone else. Just you.” _I’m fucking this all up, I can tell. It’s too serious for him, and after everything else, the fact that I’m a goddamn virgin still, he’s going to bail._

Chester looked away from him, his eyes focusing on the open bathroom door and the sink and mirror he could see from where he was. Mike was asking for them to be exclusive. _Boyfriends. I don’t even know if that would work with the way things are. With me. God, I’m going to hurt him if I do this. But he’ll hate me if I say no. Why does he have to take it this far? But. . .to be a boyfriend. . .I haven’t had that in awhile. Stupid complicated life._

He took a hard swallow before he moved back to the couch. He picked up his water before he sat down. It was cold, and it felt good. “Mike,” he said, looking over at the other man, who hadn’t moved from by the window, “I wouldn’t be a good boyfriend.” He dropped his eyes to the coffee table. “We had a nice time, right? It wouldn’t. . .I mean, I haven’t been in a relationship - a real relationship - in a long time.” 

Mike looked back out over the ocean, his heart sinking a little bit more. “Is that by choice or circumstance?” he asked, unwilling to completely give up. He knew there was something there, he felt it. He couldn’t be wrong.

Chester traced his finger over the lip of his glass of water. “By choice,” he answered. “Mike, I like you a lot and I haven’t liked anyone for a long time. But my life is complicated. We have fun together and I don’t want to lose that because I suck at being a boyfriend. I’d disappoint you.” 

Turning away from the window, Mike looked over at Chester, his slumped shoulders on the couch, a bit of vulnerability finally showing though his confident exterior. Even though he wasn’t sure Chester would give in, he came back to the couch and sat down next to him, their knees bumping together as he asked quietly, “why don’t you let me be the judge of that?” It had worked earlier, and so Mike pulled out his big puppy dog eyes again, turning them on Chester full force.

Chester looked up, ready to argue, ready to plead for Mike to drop this, but he couldn’t. He saw those eyes - those deep eyes that pulled him in like a hug. He saw Mike’s lips part, and his tongue come out to wet them. It was an involuntary move, Chester knew that, but it was still sexy as hell. “You’re terrible with those puppy eyes. You’re not playing fair here at all,” Chester said, a smile sliding over his face as he let his hand reach over and cup Mike’s knee. “I swear I’m bad, and you’ll hate me after all this. I’ll go on your wall of Worst Boyfriends Ever.” 

“Somehow, I totally doubt that,” Mike said, feeling euphoric as he touched a fingertip gently to the end of Chester’s nose. “Now… how about that movie you promised me?” He winked at his new boyfriend, a smile lighting up his entire face.

“A movie,” Chester repeated, his mind flipping toward things he couldn’t control. Things that he knew would eventually come out. Things he knew he’d eventually have to tell this guy sitting next to him. This guy who cared so much, even about him. He squeezed Mike’s knee. “Come on then,” he said, “let’s pick one out and go upstairs and lay down to watch it.” 

Mike couldn’t conceal the joy in his heart as he stood up, reaching his hand out for Chester to take as he agreed, “let’s go.”


	6. Wet & Hungry

The sun wasn’t quite on its way down yet, but it was getting there as Mike and Chester walked side by side down the beach, the ocean off to their right. The waves were gentle, rolling up onto the sand, mere feet from where the couple was talking back and forth as they fell into a relaxed stroll. 

“So,” Chester said, looking Mike’s way, his sunglasses hiding his sensitive eyes from the blaring sun in the distance, “what did you think of the game? You seemed like you had fun, but you didn’t really say.” 

Mike looked out at the ocean for a minute, letting the sound of the waves sink in. It was perfect - not something he wanted to ruin by getting into the subject of his dad and their shared love of the game. “Yeah, I love baseball. Ever since I was a kid, I’ve always been into it. It’s a strategy game, you know? I like that aspect of it. It’s not barbaric like football.” He felt up over the bottom of his shirt with his free hand, the feel of the baseball jersey a little bit foreign when he was accustomed to his comfy flannels and t-shirts now. “I could tell you were into it. I’ve never been to a game with someone so loud,” he teased.

Chester’s mouth dropped open in mock offense. “Loud?” he asked before he turned away, his smile popping across his face. “I am a screamer. I can’t help it. I’ve always been like that. You’re a trooper for sticking it out with me. Most people get embarrassed or whatever and it’s, eh,” he said with a shrug of his shoulders, “their loss. I like going to games,” he stated as he rubbed his bare arms before he tugged and straightened his blue _L.A. Dodgers_ t-shirt. He dropped his eyes down to the damp sand and how his sandals were sinking in just a little with every step. “It’s an escape, you know? You get to be surrounded by people and be participating, but no one is looking at you. You just get to enjoy it.” 

It was exactly what Mike thought about baseball, but couldn’t manage to put into words. _I love how he always knows how I feel, and he’s not even trying._ Mike glanced at Chester, admiring how gorgeous he looked in his backwards ballcap. Everything for his boyfriend seemed effortless. “That’s how I feel about it… that anonymity in a large group, being part of something bigger than yourself, it’s fun. But in my case, it’s quietly fun.” He reached for Chester’s hand, squeezing it lightly to take the sting out of his words. “We can go to the game anytime you want to go.”

Chester snuck a look over at Mike. The setting sun was blazing off of his blue hair, which seemed to be extra well-spiked today. It was a little strange for Chester to see him out of his usual flannel uniform, but the change was nice as Chester stopped their walk. He reached over and slide his finger down Mike’s neck and onto his collarbone. “So no protective undershirt with this, or is it hiding underneath there?” he asked, holding in his smirk. 

With a sideways grin, Mike chuckled and said, “you know it’s under there.” His undershirts were an endless source of amusement for Chester, who just couldn’t seem to comprehend the importance of layers. Mike had a feeling if it were socially appropriate Chester would never have a shirt on in public. “How many different ways do I have to tell you I _like_ my t-shirts? You’ll never get me to stop wearing them.” The breeze was picking up off the water and Mike turned his face into the wind, breathing in deeply. It made him think of Chester’s skin and he released Chester’s hand to wrap his arm around him and pull him closer. “I hope that’s not a problem,” he said as he dropped his lips into the curve of Chester’s neck, kissing him lightly. 

“Never a problem,” Chester mumbled back as he turned his head enough to get his lips around Mike’s earlobe. He sucked on in for just a second, his tongue messing with the other man’s hoop earring. “Hey, want to do something fun?” 

“What’s more fun than this?” Mike asked as he kissed up Chester’s neck, enjoying the closeness and the taste of his boyfriend’s skin, despite the fact that there were people nearby. He felt giddy with anticipation; everything Chester had introduced him to in the last month had been more fun than Mike had ever had, and whatever was on his mind was sure to be no different.

“This _is_ fun,” Chester made sure to say, “but you know what I mean.” He pulled away from Mike’s embrace and looked straight ahead as he pointed to some undefined place down the shoreline. “You want to race?” he asked. 

Racing was the last thing Mike Shinoda wanted to do. He wanted to stay right where he was, enjoying the beach and the kisses, but he could tell from the tone of Chester’s voice that he wasn’t going to take no for an answer. Mike looked down at his shoes. The laces were tied and there was no ready excuse to make, so there was no choice but to say, “well, okay.”

Chester took Mike’s hand and pulled him a few feet away from the waves. “Take your shoes off,” he instructed as he easily slipped out of his sandals. “You’ll get better traction in your bare feet. And leave your phone and wallet if you’ve got them on you,” he said, as he patted over his black shorts, fishing both items from his pockets, along with his keys. “They’ll just slow you down, and we’re not racing far, so no one will bother them.” He tossed his belongings on top of his sandals before he turned to see if Mike was doing the same. 

Now Mike was really feeling apprehensive. Leaving his things sounded like a bad idea, but he glanced around as he was taking off his shoes and socks. There weren’t too many people out, and Chester said they weren’t going far. Besides, it wasn’t like he had a lot of cash at the moment. He carefully shoved his wallet and cell phone inside his shoes and stood up straight, his toes digging into the sand. “Okay. Where are we going to?”

“Just down that way,” Chester said flipping his hand in the general direction that he’d already pointed to. “Here, I’ll cover our stuff up if it makes you feel better.” Without waiting for Mike to say anything, he peeled his t-shirt off and laid it over the pile of their collected belongings. “Better?” he asked, one eyebrow lifting from behind his sunglasses. 

“Yeah,” Mike responded, though he was far from caring as his eyes drifted over Chester’s tattoos. As many times as he’d seen them in the past month, he still found it hard to concentrate on anything else when Chester was shirtless. “Umm… I assume there’s something in this for the winner?” He pointed off to wherever the finish line was, trying to understand exactly what was happening.

“A prize, huh?” Chester rubbed his chin for a moment. “Okay, whoever wins gets to pick out what we eat for dinner tonight.” He looked over and Mike nodded in agreement. It was a simple prize to most people, but for Mike and Chester, they’d both realized rather quickly over the last month that food was _very_ important, and getting sole pick over a meal was a really big deal.

Chester nodded for Mike to follow him as he led the way back to where the ocean was drifting onto the sand. “So we’re going to go that way,” he stated as he pointed, “and when we get to the finish line, we’ll see who wins.” He flashed Mike a wyly smile. “You’ll know when we’re there. You ready?” he asked as he stretched his legs and leaned a little to the left and then the right before he got into a starting position. 

“Oookay,” Mike said, not really understanding what was happening, but game for it anyway. Pizza was on the line. He could run. Sort of. As long as it wasn’t far. 

Chester reached over, tapped Mike on the shoulder and said, “Go!” He took off, his toes and feet gripping the warm sand as he went. He could feel the muscles in his legs easily picking up speed. He pumped his arms, huffing in the ocean air. He glanced over his shoulder, just to make sure Mike was keeping up. 

It wasn’t a fair start, but Mike took off after Chester reflexively, his competitive inner voice pushing him forward. He wasn’t a runner, but he was keeping closer than he’d thought he would.

A hundred yards or so down the beach and Chester could see Mike wasn’t too far behind. _And now for the win,_ he chuckled inside his head before he slowed down, just enough to get side by side with his boyfriend. He ran closer, forcing Mike toward the waves before Chester flung his arms around him and _whoosh!_ Into the waves they splashed! Arms, legs, and laughter went everywhere as the warm water surrounded them. Chester’s sunglasses were gone, floating nearby as he kept his arms around Mike’s waist. “That was too easy,” he said, salt water dripping from his lips and face. “You fell for it. I just wanted to get you wet.” 

“Chester! You’re crazy!” Mike exclaimed, tossing his wet hair back off his forehead. Chester was wrapped around him like seaweed, clinging to him the same way his wet clothing stuck to his skin. He was laughing anyway, the spontaneous and carefree tumble into the water that Chester initiated was something Mike would never have done on his own in a million years. “What are we going to do now, all wet like this?” He flicked water off his fingertips onto Chester’s skin, watching the droplets sparkle in the setting sun. 

Chester pulled him closer, letting the shallow waves rush around them as they sat with their bottoms on the water covered sand. “You worry too much,” he said, kissing the side of Mike’s face. Salt and the smell of the ocean hit him immediately. He loved living here. He loved the beach and the open air that the sea breeze brought with it. Mike’s dark eyes were staring at him with that typical logical-Mike way, and something warmed in Chester’s stomach. Despite their differences, Mike was a pleasure to be around, and the more they hung out, the more Chester was looking forward to what would happen next. “We can always go back to my place,” Chester offered, “it’s not far from here. We can take a shower and then _you_ can pick what’s for dinner.” 

“ _That_ seems fair,” Mike pretended to grumble, hiding his smile for a moment. “I don’t have any clothes or anything Ches, you’re gonna have to let me in that big closet of yours.” His face broke into a grin then, thinking about cuddling up in a pair of Chester’s pajama bottoms and a t-shirt. “I guess I can make it work.” He leaned forward, catching Chester’s saltwater covered lips in a quick kiss. “You didn’t leave me much choice.” 

“Honestly, I didn’t think this far ahead,” Chester said as he nudged Mike’s arm before he spun around and fished for his sunglasses, which were floating nearby on the frothy water. “I think that’s my biggest problem in life. I’m like, right now!” he said, raising his voice to a scream and pumping his fist in the air, “and then it’s like, oh shit,” he whispered, “what do I do now?” He plastered a smile on his face before he stood up, gaining his balance in the rolls of water before he reached his hand down, and Mike took it. He pulled the other man to his feet, both of them dripping wet, their clothes sticking to them. “And I suppose I can let you into my closet. I don’t know, Sexy Boy, you’re about to go where not many have gone before.” He tossed Mike a wink. “My closet is very sacred territory.” 

Mike tried not to let the implication of others being in Chester’s closet before bother him, and he shook his head, trying to get the water out of his hair. “I promise I’ll respect your sensitivity regarding matching clothing,” he said lightly. “I don’t have to worry about that in my closet. Flannel goes with everything.” He started to walk back toward their things, grateful Chester had at least enough foresight to leave their belongings behind, even if he hadn’t thought about what to do after he pushed Mike into the ocean. It didn’t matter. Like everything else, Mike enjoyed letting go and having fun with Chester, even when he ended up unexpectedly sandy and wet.

****

Chester unlocked the door to his loft. He stepped inside and the cool air conditioning smacked his wet body immediately. He scooted to the side, holding the door open for Mike. “Let’s go upstairs,” he said, after his boyfriend had come through the doorway and Chester had shut and locked it behind them. “I’ll give you the lay of the land of my closet.” He wiggled his eyebrows before pulled his baseball cap off and tossed it onto the table along with his water splattered sunglasses as they walked by. His red-tipped mohawk was a mess as he shoved his hand through it - leftover sticky seawater grabbing his skin. He tried to catch Mike’s line of vision to see if he’d say anything. They’d been dating for a month, but this was the first time he’d ever been less than completely on point with his hair and clothes since they’d first met. As long as you didn’t count that first time in the karate get up. 

The way Chester’s hair fell to the side when he ran his hand through it interested Mike. He’d never seen it any way other than spiked up to perfection, but now it was softly fluffed and damp, and he smiled at the disarrayed style their impromptu ocean dip had caused. He wanted to reach out and touch it, see what it felt like without all the gel in it, but he held back, waiting, knowing it would be equally fluffy and a lot cleaner after they showered. As he followed Chester up the stairs he was lost in silly thoughts of wearing Chester’s clothes and touching his hair. And pizza. He wanted pizza for dinner.

“Hey, Ches?” he said as they stepped into the elevated bedroom. “I’ve decided what I want for dinner.”

“Don’t tell me,” Chester said, flipping around quickly and sticking his hand out, landing it right on the front of Mike’s soaked shirt. He shut his eyes tightly, like he was trying to read Mike’s thoughts. “You’re thinking. . .pizza?” 

“Mmm, you’re good,” Mike said, covering Chester’s hand with his own. “You already know me so well.” It surprised him every time they were in sync with each other, and it was one more tally mark in the column of “reasons why Mike and Chester are meant to be” in his head. He smiled, squeezing Chester’s hand. “Now, explain whatever it is about this closet you need to tell me. I’m wet and it’s making me cold. And the sooner we get these showers the sooner we can eat.”

“It’s simple, really,” Chester said as he took his hand back, spun around and headed for his closet. He opened the double doors and pulled the long chain for the small overhead light, which lit up his double rows of clothes - shirts hanging on the upper rod, and pants neatly pressed and hanging on the bottom. “Everything is in order by color,” he said, as he pointed from one end to the other with white and black acting as the bookends. “Long sleeves, short sleeves, no sleeves - doesn’t matter. It’s all about color. Pants are self explanatory,” he stated as he pointed to the array of jeans, dress pants, and shorts. “Pick whatever you want. Over here,” he said as he directed Mike’s attention to the other side of the room, over by the end of the bed where a small three drawer dresser sat, “is where I keep everything else. Socks, underwear, pajamas,” he said, as he pointed to each drawer in order. “I’ll go first and you can take your time picking something out.” He didn’t wait. He opened up all three drawers, pulling out a pair of underwear, socks, and gray pajama bottoms before he dashed back to the closet and pulled out a shirt. He folded everything over his arm before he pulled his cell phone from his pocket and tossed it onto the bed. “I’ll be quick, but I warn you, I can be a sloth in the shower.” 

Mike rolled his eyes as he watched Chester disappear down the stairs. He turned toward the closet, his head buzzing with all the options. _Why does anyone need this many choices? There’s enough clothes for ten people in here. This is too much to think about._ He reached out, running his hand over the sleeves of different shirts, looking for something soft and cozy. Color wasn’t a concern, despite having told Chester he’d try to be aware of what he chose. Mike just wanted to be comfortable, and after a dozen or so shirts, he landed on a short-sleeved black cotton t-shirt. It had some sort of faded gray print on the front, but it didn’t matter. The shirt was soft, and that was what Mike wanted.

He pulled the chain on the light and shut the closet doors, turning toward the dresser. The sound of the shower met his ears as he opened the drawer he’d seen Chester take pajama bottoms out of a few minutes ago. Inside were two neat piles of folded pants, and Mike smiled as he spied a pair of black and white plaid pajamas at the bottom of the stack. _See, look at that. I can match stuff._ He slid the pants out of the stack and closed the drawer just as Chester’s abandoned cell phone began to ring from where it had been tossed on the bed.

Curiosity drove him over to peer at the lock screen. _Jason._ In a matter of seconds, Mike went from carefree to concerned, wishing he hadn’t looked to see who was calling. _I wonder who Jason is… an ex-boyfriend? No, he said he hadn’t had a boyfriend in a while. Maybe it’s a relative. Oh. What if it’s… someone he had a fling with? No, I can’t think that way. He’s with me now, he wouldn’t be hooking up on the side. Right?_ The doubt crept in as the screen went black, and Mike waited to see if this Jason was going to leave a voicemail. For a few breathless seconds, Mike stared at the screen, and was disappointed to see the notification come through. _So this guy left a voicemail. It could be a million things, Mike. Don’t jump to conclusions._

Still, the sense of unease wasn’t easy to shake, and Mike stood next to the bed in his wet clothes, holding Chester’s clothes in his hands and wondering if he should say anything. He didn’t want to sound paranoid, but… where things were headed with Chester, in his mind at least, was something he wanted very much. He didn’t want there to be any secrets between them.

Downstairs, Chester was soaping up his flattened mohawk, making sure to get every bit of ocean grit scrubbed away before he shoved himself back under the shower head. He let the clean water wash over him, his mind drifting from what he thought Mike might be picking out to wear, to what they should get on their pizza. It had been a long day, and staying in for the night relaxing on the couch sounded nice. 

He twisted around, letting the water run over his back one last time before he turned the nobs, and the bathroom was suddenly quiet. Chester hummed as he stepped out and grabbed his nearby towel. He dried himself off, getting under his arms, up and down his legs, and all over his slender waist and buttocks. He let out a huff as he stared at himself in the vanity mirror. His skin was still a little damp looking, but he felt better. Cleaner. 

He pulled on his Pink Panther underwear he’d grabbed from upstairs, making sure to adjust himself just right before he took his gray pajama bottoms and pulled them up. He tugged at the waistband, then grabbed his black t-shirt with the pink collar and trim and pulled it over his head. He sat down on the toilet seat long enough to put on his pink socks and then he grabbed his comb. He ran it through his mohawk, questioning if he should blow dry it or not. _Mike didn’t seem to care when it was down. . .eh, screw it,_ he decided before he reached for his toothbrush. 

The more Mike thought about the mystery phone call, the more he needed something to get his mind off of it. He made his way downstairs with Chester’s shirt and pants, tossing them on the couch on his way to the kitchen. There was always a pad of paper and a pencil sitting on the bar, and Mike headed straight for it, picking up the pencil and starting a series of doodles to try to calm himself down. His mind had a way of taking small things and making them much bigger than they needed to be, and drawing was a way to focus himself back on what was important. Right now, the important thing was trying to find out who Jason was without coming across as jealous or possessive. It was too early to be acting that way, and somehow Mike knew that things wouldn’t go very far with Chester if he let on just how much that phone call was bothering him. 

Chester stepped out of the bathroom, his mood bright as he glanced around and spotted Mike immediately, hunched over the bar. “It’s all yours,” he said, nodding his head as he walked. “Whatcha you doing?” He stopped just short of where Mike was standing with his head down, his endless eyes focused on the paper in front of him. Chester tilted his head, trying to see exactly what it was his boyfriend was drawing. 

“Just… passing the time while you were showering.” Mike didn’t look up as he finished framing his little Eskimo’s face in a furry hood. For some reason he’d drawn an igloo, and an Eskimo, and it made absolutely no sense in context of the warm L.A. sunshine he’d been walking in earlier. “I didn’t want to sit on the furniture all wet,” he added, setting the pencil down and avoiding Chester’s gaze. “I’ll be quick.”

Without making any sort of contact, Mike picked the clothes up off the couch and retreated into the bathroom, closing the door behind him and taking a deep breath of steamy air. The sketching had only calmed his nerves a bit, and as he stripped off his wet, sandy clothes, he tried another deep breath. _You always think the worst, Mike. He’s not fooling around behind your back. He’s different. You can’t just accuse him like that._

The water was warm as soon as Mike turned on the shower, and he stepped in, grateful to rinse away the beach and ocean water. He leaned his head back and let the shower run over his face for a second before he wiped a hand over his eyes and reached for Chester’s shampoo. A bit of a smile crossed his face as he squirted a little in his hand and the smell of peaches rose up through the steam. Any other time, he would have been excited to share his boyfriend’s scent, but right now, all he could think about was Jason. It made being in Chester’s shower for the first time, using his things the way they would do someday if they lived together, less enjoyable. He knew he had to find out who had called, but part of him didn’t want to know. 

Chester watched as Mike avoided him before he disappeared into the bathroom and shut the door. _Hmmm...did my closet totally turn him off or what? No. That couldn’t be it. He’s probably just hungry. Dammit. Forgot to ask him what he wanted on the pizza. No mushrooms, I know that. We usually get a supreme._ He glanced down at the paper Mike had been drawing on. _That’s cute._ He picked it up, inspecting the light and dark shades his boyfriend had managed to work into the little scene in the space of minutes, not hours. “I can’t draw for shit,” Chester mumbled, his heart sinking a little. “He’s so freakin’ talented.” He turned and looked toward the bathroom. He could hear the water still running as he left Mike’s art piece on the bar. He stepped into the kitchen properly, taking down a few glasses and filling them with ice and water as he debated over options for something they could watch on T.V. 

He absently felt over the pockets of his pajama bottoms, and he realized his phone wasn’t there. For a quick moment his mind scrambled to remember where it was as he looked around the kitchen and on the table, before he looked up. _Right. Up on the bed._ He was across the room and up the stairs in a flash, his stomach growling for food as he grabbed his phone and headed back down. He saw the missed call and voicemail from Jason just as Mike stepped out of the bathroom. 

Feeling much cleaner, but not any more relaxed, Mike sat down on the couch and ran his hands through his damp hair. Chester’s t-shirt was a bit more snug on him than he usually liked them to be, and he definitely had no underwear on under the pajama bottoms he’d picked out. The whole experience of wearing his boyfriend’s clothes was adding to the anxiety Mike was dealing with, and it didn’t help that the offending cell phone was in Chester’s hands.

“Oh,” Mike said, trying to sound nonchalant. “Did you see you missed a call? Jason? Called while you were in the shower?” His eyes flicked toward Chester’s face, searching for any clues about the mystery caller. 

Chester’s eyes narrowed. “Yeah,” he said, before he looked away and across the room. “I saw. So, what do you want on your pizza? Forgot to ask before you disappeared.” He was across the room now, standing by the kitchen bar, keeping his eyes down, staring at the dark polished floors. 

Mike slid his hands under his thighs, sitting on them so he wouldn’t twist them in his nervousness. “The usual’s fine. Supreme, no mushrooms.” He watched his boyfriend from across the room, noting how he was now the one avoiding eye contact. “Ches? Who’s Jason?”

Chester looked up, his eyes meeting Mike’s. He could tell the other was worried, or suspicious. Maybe both. “He’s, uh, he’s just from work,” Chester explained. He paused for a moment, running his tongue over his lip ring. “He’s, like, my boss. Kind of.” He shook his head. “Not my boss, boss. He’s kind of like second in command,” he explained before he looked away and scanned his phone. “I’ll call him back later. He probably just needs me to come in tomorrow or something.” He looked back up, hoping he’d said enough to satisfy whatever was picking at Mike’s thoughts. “It’s just work,” Chester added again since he could practically feel Mike’s nerves. 

“Oh,” Mike said, the relief flooding over him instantly. “Oh, okay.” Work was fine, normal. Nothing to worry about, and the entire mood of the evening shifted in Mike’s mind. “Well, I hope he doesn’t mind waiting, because right now, you’re all mine.” He stood up, pulling on the hem of the snug t-shirt, and made his way over to the bar, sliding his hands around Chester’s waist and bringing him close. The scent of peaches was strong, having been used on both their hair, and Mike smiled as he breathed in deeply. “Your hair is super cute right now.” 

Chester’s face beamed. “Really?” he asked, his top teeth coming out slightly to hold his lip ring in place as he smiled. “I was actually a little worried you’d be. . .I don’t know, disappointed or something that I didn’t fix it back up.” He returned Mike’s embrace, letting his fingers explore all over Mike’s mid section. “This basically fits you,” he said. “And I like it with these pants, but, Mike, I gotta say, this is, like, the oldest shirt I own. I didn’t even think I had it anymore. It’s faded,” he added, picking at the front of it. “I need to throw it out.” 

“What? No, you can’t do that. This is literally the softest shirt you own. You’re not allowed to throw it out. This can be my shirt I keep at your place.” Mike grinned, pleased with his solution. “Now you can’t throw it out, because it’s mine. And, it’s not flannel,” he added, his voice lilting upwards at the end, doing his best to convince his boyfriend to keep the shirt.

Chester shook his head, his eyes going soft as he looked at Mike’s insistent expression. “You win,” he said, dipping his head a little to grab Mike’s lips quickly before he pulled back. “It’s yours now, and you can keep it here. I won’t even charge you rent for it.” He tickled his fingers up Mike’s front, until he’d reached the other man’s neck, where he feathered along his collar to the back of his head. “You smell really good. But, I have a question. . .you didn’t take any socks,” he said, his hand dropping to point at Mike’s bare feet, “so does that mean you didn’t take any underwear either?” He lightly slid one finger up Mike’s leg, stopping at the waistband. 

Mike felt the blush cover his cheeks as Chester’s finger stopped at the top of his pajama pants. “I don’t like to wear socks unless I have to,” he whispered, wiggling his toes freely against the floor. “And I didn’t take any underwear, either.” There was nothing but black and white plaid pajama bottoms between him and Chester’s hand, and he was waiting to see what Chester was going to think about that. 

“Living dangerously, I see,” Chester said through his smile as his hand made its way to the front of Mike’s pajamas. He let his fingers drop down and he pressed them just enough to find Mike’s hiding cock. “You should go sit on the couch,” he suggested, his hand keeping its place as he spoke, “and I’ll order the pizza before I join you.” 

The feel of Chester’s hand sent Mike’s heart racing, and he followed directions eagerly. “Don’t forget, no mushrooms,” he called as he practically skipped to the couch. It was going to be a good evening - pizza, a little intimacy, some snuggling on the couch. Any worries Mike had felt over Jason’s phone call were far away now as he sat down and watched Chester from across the room.

Thankfully, Chester had the pizza place’s number already in his phone. It was a quick call as he rambled off his name, number, and what they wanted. He tossed in an order of cheesy breadsticks with rich marinara sauce to go with it before he left his phone on the counter and headed for the couch. “Wrong position,” he announced as he crossed his arms, looking down at Mike. “If you want your prize for winning the race earlier, you’re going to have to lay down.” 

A moment’s confusion hit Mike as he looked at his boyfriend, then realized that he wasn’t talking about pizza. “Oh? There’s another prize?” Mike turned and scooted his butt down the cushion, laying his head on the pillow that was against the arm of the couch. “How’s this?”

“Perfect,” Chester said as he sat down, facing Mike, one leg up under himself. He started with Mike’s bare feet, gently rubbing his fingers over the other’s tanner skin. He laced them around each toe, both heels, and the soft underside of Mike’s arches. He circled Mike’s ankles, one at a time, feeling just the faintest hint of the dark leg hair that was hiding up under the legs of the pajama pants. Chester grabbed the bottom of one of them tugging at it. “You should just take these off. . .or let me?” 

Everything Chester was doing felt good, and Mike was in no condition to argue with him. “Go ahead.” He lifted his hips a bit to give Chester better leverage, biting down on his bottom lip as he watched every movement his boyfriend made. Mike could feel his heart pounding and he dug his fingers into the couch cushion, waiting.

Chester pulled the cotton bottoms down and off, tossing them to the floor. He was already feeling exhilarated as his pulse quickened and his dick twitched slightly. He coaxed one of Mike’s legs up to drape over the back of the couch, and his other hanging off the cushion, his bare foot resting on the floor. He had his boyfriend right where he wanted him, spread open and exposed. Chester licked his lips, his eyes zeroed in on Mike’s partial erection and the way it was hanging to the right. His ball sack was in full sight as well, and Chester was ready to give that some play just before he looked up. 

He froze, his excitement coming to a halt as he got caught in Mike’s big brown eyes looking up at him - his innocent eyes that were putting complete faith and trust in him right now. Thoughts of Jason and what might happen tomorrow whizzed through Chester’s mind and he shut his eyes. Things had already gone further with Mike than what he’d expected. Maybe not physically, but emotionally it had become something stronger. . .something that was growing with every date they went on, every phone call they shared, every laugh they enjoyed together. 

In the moment their eyes connected, before Chester had closed his, Mike saw hesitation in the way Chester was looking at him. Just a second, a flicker, but enough for him to know that Chester wasn’t sure Mike wanted him to continue. It sent a tender feeling of sweet warmth through Mike’s body, the knowledge that Chester cared. They had come a long way in just a month, from Chester pushing him up against the door in a lust-fueled haze, to wordlessly asking for permission now. Mike sucked in a breath and said, “Ches? It’s okay. What we’re doing… what you’re doing… I want you to. I’m okay.”

Chester kept his eyes shut for a second more before he looked to see Mike waiting on him. _This is silly. What’s wrong with me? I know what I’m doing. He wants me to, and I want to. So it’s okay._ He let his shoulders relax. “Sorry,” he mumbled, wetting his lips. “My head just got away from me for minute. Shut your eyes,” he said, running his hand from Mike’s raised ankle all the way down his calf and then his inner thigh. He shifted slightly, allowing himself to lean forward as he cupped Mike’s balls, making sure to be gentle as he felt the two separate orbs hiding inside. 

He leaned over, placing a soft kiss on Mike’s raised leg, and slowly he pet his lips all the way down, nuzzling his nose against Mike’s private area. He could smell the mix of clean scent and sexual arousal coming off of Mike’s body. He moved his hand up, tracing it along Mike’s now stiff shaft as he let his mouth hang open, purposely sending hot breathes all over his boyfriend’s penis. 

Mike’s eyes closed and his hands relaxed as Chester touched him, then hovered over him. His body was begging for more, for Chester’s hands to curl around his dick, or, better yet, his mouth to cover him. He hadn’t had the pleasure of being on the receiving end of a blow job from Chester, and he wanted it. Right now, his boyfriend was teasing him, and it felt good, but he was ready for more than light touches and warm breaths. “Ches… you’re teasing me…”

“Maybe,” Chester mumbled from where he was, his smile hidden from Mike’s sight. “But getting there is so much fun.” He let his tongue roll out, his nose less than an inch from Mike’s erection, as he licked him. Mike’s skin was warm, and Chester started at the base, and went all the way up, stopping just short of the head. He did it again, wetting Mike’s length with as much spit and slobber as he could come up with, using a mix of long licks and short sloppy kisses before he moved back and let his hand take over. 

He wrapped every digit around Mike’s cock, and up and down he let it slide. He felt Mike’s legs tense and shake - sure signs he was getting the reaction he wanted as he let his fingers slip up and over the head now, dragging them through the pre-cum that was seeping out. 

Chester’s tongue had felt amazing, and Mike felt his body quake now under his touch. He could feel the tension rising in his belly as Chester skillfully moved his hand up and down his cock. _God, that’s so fucking good. I fucking love it when he rubs his thumb right… there…_ “Fuck, Ches, that’s good!” Mike didn’t want him to stop, he wanted a little bit more pressure, a bit more friction, and he thrust his hips up into Chester’s hand as much as he could from his sprawled out position on the couch. 

Chester smiled at Mike’s bucking hips. “Easy, Sexy Boy,” he said, lifting his head to try and catch a glimpse of Mike’s face, “almost there.” He squeezed his fingers around the base of Mike’s mushroom head, tugging it slightly and making the slit press together before he leaned down and wrapped his lips around the shaft. He sucked on it as he ran his mouth up and down, letting his lip ring drag against Mike’s tender skin, knowing that the ball in the middle of the ring was one more pressure - one more texture - in this. He kept going, allowing his lips to suck and wrap around every inch of Mike, other than his weeping head, which was still being held in tight captivity by Chester’s fingers. 

He was about to do another round, ready to suck a bit harder and get his lips up under Mike’s head, as someone knocked on the front door. Chester stopped, his mind pulling out of where he was as he looked across the loft. “Think that’s our pizza,” he said, his voice soft as he let Mike go. He kissed him on his knee. “Don’t move.” He stood up, slowly, and he had to shift his pajama bottoms a bit as he walked, trying to get his own excitement to calm down. He grabbed his wallet and after the shortest amount of small talk ever with a pizza delivery guy, he closed the door and set their dinner on the bar. “We’re not stopping to eat, right?” He asked, waiting by the heavenly smelling food - bubbling cheese, pepperoni, sausage, onions, and green peppers. 

“Fuck, no,” Mike breathed from his place on the couch, frustration evident in his tone. “Pizza can wait. Come back over here,” he called, turning his head in the direction of the kitchen. The food smelled good but nothing was as good as Chester’s mouth, licking him, sucking him… sucking him. A thought occurred to Mike suddenly, and he mentally chastised himself for not mentioning it before. “Fuck. Chester, shouldn’t we… don’t you think we should be using a condom?” Mike cursed himself silently, not only for his carelessness, but for the additional break in the pleasure the conversation would cause.

Chester was already back at the couch, leaning over the arm, staring at his unfinished work. “Oh,” he said, his mind suddenly coming back to reality. “Right,” he agreed. “Don’t move,” he said again, flashing Mike a serious expression before he headed for the stairs. He took them quickly, wanting to grab the first one he could find so they could finish what they’d started. He opened the nightstand by his bed, snatched one of the condoms like his life depended on it, and then he was back downstairs. The wrapper was already open by the time he got back to the couch. “You want to do this?” 

Mentally, Mike didn’t want to do anything, but he reached for the condom, making quick work of rolling it down his still very hard erection. He was anxious to get back to what they were doing, and he tossed the wrapper on the floor next to the couch before he reached for Chester. He was longing for connection, for Chester’s kiss, before they went any further. Mike grabbed his hand and pulled him down, pressing their lips together and relishing the feel of Chester’s lip ring on his tongue, the lip ring that had felt so good on his dick moments ago, before he released their kiss with a pop and said, “I’m ready.”

Chester sent his fingers through Mike’s blue hair as he stayed kneeled down, and a second later he joined their lips together for a second time. His eyes fell shut as he pulled Mike’s warmth and giving spirit into his own. He massaged his fingers, feeling the softness of Mike’s hair, and then the skin on his ear and neck before he finally pulled back, his mouth still agape. “Okay,” he said, though he wasn’t sure why. He stole on last quick peck to the other man’s lips before he stood up and returned to his position at the other end of the couch. 

It was a hastened few touches - fingers down Mike’s legs, and a bit of play with his now cloaked cock before Chester leaned all the way forward, and took just the head of Mike’s penis into his mouth. He wrapped his lips around it, his lip ring pressing up against the underside of Mike’s head, right in the crease where it joined together. He swished his tongue back and forth over every bit of what was in his mouth, tasting the peach flavor of the condom and the pulsing that was going on underneath of it. 

He pounded his tongue against where he knew Mike’s slit was, condom or not, he knew the other man could feel it if he used enough pressure. He waited till he heard Mike moan, and then he opened his mouth enough to let the rest of his length slide in. 

He took as much as he could at once, before he pulled back and then he did again. He wrapped his hand around the base of Mike’s cock, giving his mouth some relief as he bobbed his head and hand up and down in unison, to give Mike the feeling of being completely swallowed. He let his head tilt and his hand matched the motion - a slight twist to give some extra friction and sensation. 

It was heaven, the heat, the pressure, Chester’s mouth and his hand taking every inch of his cock in and sending wave after wave of pleasure through Mike’s body. Somehow in his daze, Mike lifted a hand to Chester’s head, and the softness of the unstyled hair he found there registered in his mind. He stroked his hand over the back of Chester’s head and tried not to push his hips up into the other man’s mouth too much, but it was hard to hold back. Every nerve ending in the lower half of his body was on fire, ready to explode. All he needed was a little bit more, just a little more…

Mike’s hips jerked up, and Chester knew it was time. He moved his hand up on Mike’s shaft, and let his lips latch onto the head. He sucked hard, sending his tongue to do its work as his hand went up and down. He could feel Mike’s body tensing, and he could hear his breaths going on overdrive. Chester added a thumb up under the base of Mike’s sensitive head, pressing on the top side as his lip ring pressed from the bottom. 

That was it, that little bit more Mike needed, and he felt his release starting from his unclenched toes as it rushed through his body in forceful spurts, the first one longer than the second, or the third. He felt Chester’s lips around him, the pressure of his lip ring as he came hard, and Chester rode out each wave with him, never relaxing his lips until Mike’s body relaxed, until his hips stopped moving, until his hand fell away from Chester’s hair. As he lay underneath Chester, his breathing heavy, his body heavy, he only had one thought - “wow.” It was the only word he could manage, the only thing that was floating through his head as he felt Chester release him, placing tiny kisses on the inside of his thigh and up onto his stomach.

“I’ll take ‘wow’,” Chester said through a sheepish smile. “You ready for pizza now? I know I’ve worked up a hell of an appetite.” He sat back, pulling his legs out from underneath of him to sit properly on the couch. He took a few deep breaths, willing his own body to calm down. He could feel his legs tingling and his cock was more than ready to get some pleasure of its own, but not tonight. That much Chester had decided already. Tonight he wanted Mike to have it all. He looked over, his aroused eyes landing on Mike’s satisfied face. “Pizza and blow jobs, not a bad way to spend the evening.” 

Mike didn’t want to move, but the condom on his rapidly shrinking cock made going to the bathroom a necessity. “That was… yeah, fuck, yeah, I’m ready for pizza.” He grinned at Chester, feeling thoroughly exhausted and starving as well. “Let me go take care of this, maybe you’ll be sweet enough to grab me a slice too?” He gestured to the condom as he sat up and swung his legs over the edge of the couch. “I’ll be a minute. Hand me your pants?” 

“I can be sweet,” Chester said immediately, like Mike had challenged him on some level. He got up and fetched Mike’s chosen pants from the floor. “I’m just careful about spreading sweet around. People get the wrong idea if you hand it out freely all the time.” He tossed Mike the pants before he headed for the kitchen. He was tired, and his jaw was sore, and it was way past time to eat. He took down plates from the cabinets and piled both of them high with slices of pizza and cheesy breadsticks. He sat both down on the table, but then he thought better of it. 

Mike was already gone, into the bathroom to take care of business, and Chester wasn’t in the mood to sit in a hard chair while they swallowed their dinner. He took their plates to the coffee table before he went back to the kitchen to get napkins and their glasses of iced water they hadn’t even touched yet. 

He was just sitting down, gulping the cold liquid when Mike returned. “See how sweet I can be?” Chester asked. “I brought you food _and_ a drink.” 

“I’m starving,” Mike said, reaching for his plate and throwing Chester a smile that eclipsed his entire face. “Thanks for being so sweet.” He settled back onto the couch and lifted a slice of pizza, inhaling the glorious scent of meat and cheese and sauce. He wasn’t joking - he couldn’t remember being hungrier than he was right now. 

Apparently Chester really was starving, too, and the pair scarfed down pizza and cheesy bread without saying a word. Mike realized that his entire afternoon, from the baseball game, to the walk on the beach, the magnificent blow job and the pizza, was a far better way to deal with the stresses of his job than curling up on the couch alone with ice cream. It was another moment in his relationship with Chester than made him happy to have found the other man, and grateful it still seemed to be going well. An entire month. He cut his eyes over to Chester, who was dipping his cheesy bread in marinara with gusto.

“This is so good, just what I needed after using all my energy racing you,” he said playfully. “I don’t run that much sitting at a piano bench all morning.” 

Chester swallowed his bite of saucy bread before he said, “I’m a non-practicing runner. I should do it more, but I usually end up talking myself out of it. I stick to the situps and jump rope and karate class. We do run there, so maybe I’m not as slack as I think.” He offered Mike a silly look before he added, “don’t you get bored sitting at a piano all day with kids hanging around?”

The pizza crust Mike was holding went straight down to the plate as he looked at Chester earnestly. “No, not at all. Not bored, anyway. Frustrated, sometimes, when they don’t practice. Or when they’re just there because their parents are forcing them to be there.” Mike leaned over and sat the plate down on the coffee table, picking up his napkin and wiping off his fingers. “Most of the kids are super fun to teach. It’s amazing, after you’ve been teaching them for a while, how much you learn about them, their personalities and their families and such. Sometimes that makes things harder, though.”

He sat back, thinking about a particular favorite student, a boy who had started off really shy in his lessons, but with a lot of natural talent. Mike had been teaching him for a year now, and over that time he’d grown really fond of Drew. “Like, I have this one student, his name is Drew, he’s going to be so good. He can already do more than I could at his age. He’s got all this musical talent, but his dad is a total asshole about it. Mom is awesome, she’s the one encouraging him to keep going, keep practicing, but dad… he wants his boy to be an athlete. It’s so stupid.” Mike shook his head, his forehead creased as he squinted his eyes. “I mean, I swam my whole life, and kept up with music. And Drew, he really loves playing piano. He tells me all kinds of stuff while he’s playing, how his dad is always yelling at him and his sister, that dad has a _girlfriend_ and doesn’t come home sometimes… it’s really fucked up. And I hate that kind of stuff. A really great kid with all this potential, being held back by a terrible father, and then there’s kids I teach with two great parents and every advantage, and they’re just lazy.” 

Mike dragged his hands through his hair and looked at Chester. “I probably take it too personally. I tend to get more involved than I should, and sometimes I can’t get their problems out of my head when I get home. But… when you and I are together, I don’t think about that stuff so much. Work doesn’t get to me like it usually does.”

Chester nodded slowly. “Glad I can help. I, uh, I think you’re a really good person, Mike. Caring like that. Not everyone would.” He looked away and down at the coffee table where both their plates were sitting now. There were stray bits of crust and toppings that had fallen off, but for the most part, they’d both managed to devour everything. “So, you want to stay the night?” Chester asked as he looked back Mike’s way. “It’s getting late, and I’m thinking neither of us are up for driving all the way back to your place.” He shoved his hand through his floppy mohawk as he waited for Mike to say something. “No pressure,” he had to say when he didn’t get an immediate answer. “I’m not saying we should do anything else tonight,” he said as he motioned between the two of them. “Just hanging out and we can watch a movie and pass out. . .if you want?” 

It sounded like the perfect ending to the day, the next step in their relationship that Mike had been looking forward to, the invitation to sleep with Chester. Spending the night curled up next to his boyfriend was exactly what Mike wanted, and he couldn’t hold back the smile as thoughts of teaching and students faded into the background. “I’d really like that,” he said, reaching over to place his hand on Chester’s knee.

“Good,” Chester said, his mind fluttering with thoughts of getting Mike upstairs to the comfortable bed that lived there. He nudged him on his arm. “If you’re done, you can head upstairs and pick something out for us to watch. I gotta pee first.” He stood up, taking both their plates with him. He dropped them off in the kitchen, and he picked up his phone, shoving it in his pocket. He headed to the bathroom. Just as he closed the door his phone rang, and he quickly pulled it out to see Jason’s name flashing over the screen. He hesitated for a moment, looking from his phone to the closed door before he tapped the decline button. Mike was waiting on him, and the last thing Chester wanted to do was get into a long-winded conversation about tomorrow and all the details he knew Jason would want to discuss. Not tonight. Not while Mike was here. Jason was going to have to wait.

****

TBC


	7. Lap Dances and the Guy in the Gold Vest

Anna folded her paperback novel in her lap as she looked over at the wall clock. Any minute Mike’s boyfriend would be arriving to pick him up. Any minute, she’d get to meet Chester Bennington for the first time. After hearing about how wonderful this guy was for the last month, she was somewhere between excited and terribly nervous to see him in person. She shoved a strand of hair behind her ear as she leaned back a little more in the recliner. She’d seen countless pictures of Chester over the last several weeks. Everytime Mike would come home from a date or even a casual day of hanging out with Chester, he was ready with stories and at least one picture. In all the time she’d known Mike, this was the first time she’d ever seen him giddy over someone. The first time she’d ever seen him fall in love with someone. 

_Not that he’s ready to admit that just yet. But he’s close. He’s so close._ She smiled at the thought of her sweet friend finally finding _the one_ just as someone knocked on the door. It brought Anna out of her brief daydream state, and she hurriedly got to her feet. She straightened out her blouse, and messed with her hair one last time before she opened the door, a smile plastered on her face. 

“Hi,” Chester said, his thin lips lifting to a partial smile. “You must be Anna. I’m, I’m Chester - Mike’s boyfriend.” He could feel his heart beating a little faster as he looked Mike’s roommate up and down. Unlike himself, Mike liked to share. He could go on for hours about his work and his homelife; the only subject he tended to shy away from was his parents. But Anna, Anna he’d heard a lot about over the last several weeks, and she matched every picture Mike had ever shared with him. _But shorter than I figured._

“Of course you are,” Anna said, finally finding her words as she stepped back. “Please, come on in.” She watched as Chester stepped inside. Despite her mental knowledge of what he physically looked like, she was still finding herself staring as she started with his boots, up his skin tight black leather pants and the gray short sleeved, v-neck shirt he was wearing. His slender build pulled the outfit off and she had no doubt that this guy was ready for the club Mike had said was their destination for the night. _He’s even got on eyeliner. . .and his nails are painted black._ “Mike’s still getting ready,” she said, pointing toward the hallway where the bedrooms were. 

Chester nodded. He’d already been in this apartment once before and it hadn’t changed much since he’d been here over a month ago. There were still books everywhere, cheap flooring and not a lot of room to move around. The whole place smelled like hair care products, which is when he remembered that Mike had said Anna was in beauty school. 

“Mike says you two are going to a club,” Anna said, catching Chester’s attention before he could wander any closer to the hallway. She knew Mike wasn’t a big fan of his cramped bedroom, and he probably wasn’t keen on the idea of his boyfriend getting an eye full of it. 

Chester turned around, meeting her eyes. “Yeah,” he said, his black and green lip ring pressing to his bottom lip. “Good music, good people. I told Mike I was going to make him dance.” 

Anna covered her mouth for a moment as she laughed. “Mike dance? Oh, you must really think you’re something special if you can make that happen.” 

“He’ll be fine,” Chester assured her. “He just needs to remember to have fun, and he’ll be ready to let loose with everyone else.” He swung his hips, turning himself around in a small circle with a comic swing of his arms and snap of his fingers, making Anna laugh even harder. 

“You’re cute,” she finally said. “Mike hasn’t been wrong about that. He adores you, you know.” 

Chester stopped, his clownish behavior halting like the wind had suddenly been knocked out of him. “Real. . .really?” he asked, his hands suddenly feeling antsy as he rubbed the sides of his leather pants. 

Anna nodded. “He does,” she confirmed. “Well, maybe I should go see if he’s ready.” She went to head down the hallway, but Chester was faster. He jumped ahead of her, like he had springs on his feet. 

“No, let me,” he said, and before Anna could object he was already standing in front of Mike’s bedroom door, knocking. 

Thinking it was Anna, Mike absent-mindedly called toward his door, “come in!” He was in front of the mirror, still wrestling with the cuff of Dave’s shirt he’d borrowed as he tried to roll it up neatly, but not too neatly. When Chester suggested going to a club, Mike had gone into a panic, his wardrobe ill-equipped for such a scene. In fact, he’d never been in a club in his life. Thankfully, his best friend was no stranger to nights out, and Mike had frantically texted him for help. There was no time to get into the details, and as Mike dug through Dave’s available options, he’d managed to put him off until next week, promising to meet for lunch to give the low down on his new boyfriend. 

He managed the last roll on the sleeve of the white button down shirt just as the door opened, the movement catching his eye in the mirror, and he saw Chester poke his head inside instead of Anna.

“Hey, Mike, you almost read-” But Chester stopped, his gaze ghosting up and down Mike’s very non-flannel outfit. The jeans his boyfriend had on were snugger than usual, outlining his frame a bit more nicely. The pale shirt he was fiddling with brought out the dark quality in his eyes, and his natural tanner skin tone. “Wow, Sexy Boy,” Chester said after clearing his throat and stepping the rest of the way in the room. “You look great. Hella great.” 

Mike turned around, a smile already on his face, the privacy of his bedroom forgotten as he basked in Chester’s compliment. “Damn, so do you,” he said, taking a step toward his boyfriend. His eyes drank in the gray v-neck and tight leather pants, skipping back up to notice the different lip ring. It was only two more steps in the small space to wrap one hand around Chester’s waist and reach to touch the neon green and black ring in his lip. “What’s this?” he asked, his finger grazing over it lightly.

“It’s new,” Chester answered. “You like it? It glows in the dark,” he made sure to say as he nuzzled his lips to Mike’s fingers, kissing them gently. “We’re going to a club, remember, lots of dark corners for us to get lost in.” 

“Yeah, I like it,” Mike said, pulling Chester closer to him by his belt loop. “Don’t let me get lost without you.” His fingertips drifted down Chester’s neck, tracing the collar of the v-neck shirt. “We don’t have to go out, you know. We could always… stay here.”

It wasn’t like Mike to suggest staying in his small bedroom, and he saw Chester glance around the room quickly. There weren’t but a few steps around the double bed, neatly covered in a dark blue and white striped blanket. Next to the dresser Mike had been standing at when he walked in was the closet door, tightly shut, and on the wall next to the bed was a decently sized window, blocked by Mike’s full-sized keyboard on a stand. Crates next to the piano were full of music books and what looked like a healthy amount of various art supplies, most notably spray paint. Even though the space was tight, it was clean and organized, and there were no piles of books in the small amount of walking space. 

Mike leaned in to drag his lips along the skin that v-neck shirt exposed, and whispered, “what do you think? Go out? Or stay in?”

Chester snaked his arm around Mike’s middle, his fingers massaging the other man’s side. “And what would we do if we stayed here?” he asked, repressing the grin that wanted to pop off his face. He already had his nose up against Mike’s hair, inhaling the fresh scent of coconut from his boyfriend’s regular shampoo, with only the hint of the gel that was holding up his blue spikes. 

“Oh, I don’t know,” Mike breathed against Chester’s skin before he nipped a quick little bite to his neck. “I can promise you I wouldn’t get lost in any dark corners of this little room, though.”

Chester’s eyes narrowed for a moment as he stole another glance around the room. “Mike, you can’t even see the corners in here.” 

That was all it took to bring Mike back to his senses, a small chuckle escaping his lips as he stepped back, his legs hitting the end of the bed. “I know, I know. There’s not really room for two in here, is there? I guess that’s why we always end up at your place.” He motioned at the door. “You’ll have to go first, I can’t even squeeze by your hot ass in this space.” 

Chester’s eyebrows raised. He liked that. He liked that a lot. Mike was looking at his ass. . .Mike was calling his ass hot. And even though he knew the younger man was attracted to him, hearing Mike’s lips say such a thing so casually was nice. “I would get claustrophobic in here,” Chester said as he made his way to the door. “No offense, but it’s kind of tight. And not in a good way.” He went to instinctually tug at his shirt collar before he realized he didn’t have one, his fingers groping at his exposed skin as he landed back out in the hallway. He took a few hard breaths, relieved to have more space around him. 

“Hey, Anna,” Mike called as they emerged into the living room, “we’re heading out. Don’t wait up,” he added, winking at her behind Chester’s back as he stepped over a stack of books. 

She waved from her chair. “Bye, boys,” she called out after them as she nodded toward Mike’s wink. “Have fun.” She watched as Chester opened the front door, and the way he held it for Mike to go out first. _Cute and a gentleman. I think Mike might have a winner._

****

Chester led the way, his hand clasped to Mike’s as they walked down a darkened hallway. The walls were pulsing as the electronic dance music played from the other side. This was club Dance L.A. and Chester had been here more times than he could count. The music was loud, but it had a great beat - a rhythm to shake your hips to and grind up against someone who’d caught your attention. He and Mike were still underage, so they couldn’t drink and proof of that was stamped on the back of both of their hands now - the word NO in big, ugly block lettering. But it didn’t matter. Drinking wasn’t the only thing to do at Dance L.A.. They could dance, they could sit at one of the small tables and watch the crowd when they needed a break. They could play pool on the tables in the downstairs room. They could throw darts and mingle. And if the mood hit them, they could find a more secluded place to sit and make out. It might sound juvenile, but there was something about sneaking kisses and touches under the table while the room jumped around them that was exciting. 

Chester shoved open the door at the end of the hallway, and they were assaulted by the booms and crazy electronic riffs that were responsible for the building feeling like it was in the middle of an earthquake. 

They stepped in, and Chester felt Mike’s hand squeeze his. “This is it!” Chester half-screamed as they stopped at the back of the room, looking forward. “That’s the dance floor!” He pointed to the large, open square space where people were dancing, and all around that square people were standing. They were drinking and latched onto each other. This was the mingling, and it was all around them, as people bumped against them in passing.

Massive speakers that were four feet tall but about five feet long, helped outline the dance floor, and people took advantage of it as they sat, stood, and layed on top of them, letting the vibrations ricochet through their bodies. Chester had to grin. He’d love to get Mike on one of those speakers before the night was over. 

“Chester!” Mike shouted close to his ear, “there’s a lot of people in here!” Someone bumped into him from behind and Mike frowned. This was not his kind of scene. It was worse than karate class. Lots of sweaty people, and most of them were drinking. He scanned the room and wondered if he could really have fun in this place. Chester had seemed so convinced this was a good idea. 

Chester leaned close, his lips right next to Mike’s ear. “That’s what makes it fun,” he said, keeping the scream from his voice despite the noise. “Come on.” He tugged on Mike’s hand, and even though he felt the reluctance in his boyfriend’s steps, he pressed on. _He’ll warm up to it. It’s his first time is all._ He traversed the crowd like a pro, side stepping this person, and waiting for that couple to pass by them. In no time they were toward the middle of the outside ring. “Want to dance?” he asked, already knowing it was way too soon to ask, but he couldn’t help himself. Dancing was fun. There was no need to be good at it, just as long as you moved to the music, and had a good time doing it, that was all that mattered. The thought of getting Mike on the dance floor and pressing their bodies together was something he really wanted to turn into reality. 

There didn’t seem to be a lot of options on the table. Chester had pulled them onto the dance floor, and there was no choice but to go with it. Mike could already feel his heart racing, and not in a good way. The anxiety was kicking in big time. The way Chester had felt in his small bedroom was the way he felt right now - suffocatingly claustrophobic. “I guess so!” Trying not to freak out about all the people around them, Mike let Chester take the lead.

“Just go with the music!” Chester said, wrapping his arms around Mike’s neck, his bottom half bouncing around as he partly swung his hips and partly bucked them into Mike’s front. He leaned in now and again, letting his lips touch Mike’s face, before he’d pull back. He let go and spun around, wiggling his small bottom up against his boyfriend for a minute before he spun back around, their eyes connecting in the haze of the environment. The music was so loud, and even though there were tons of people around, much like the baseball game the week before, no one was paying them any attention. 

At least not until another guy came over, dancing close to them. He had blonde hair and a gold vest on as he danced close, his body within inches of Chester and Mike. He kept looking Chester’s way, his flashy eyes not being shy about it as the music pounded on. 

It was obvious, even to Mike, that this guy was trying to edge in on his territory. Mike grabbed Chester by the belt loops, pulling his body close, connecting their hips as they moved to the music. He didn’t waste a moment, immediately crashing his lips into Chester’s, possessively kissing him right there on the dance floor. He felt Chester’s lips part in surprise, and Mike slid a hand up to his neck, boldly pressing his tongue forward into Chester’s warm mouth as they danced. Chester was his. There was no room for this guy in his unfortunate gold vest. 

The music came to a stop as the song ended, and the crowd of dancers all stopped with it. Chester pulled back, breaking the kiss. It was hot in the club, and as he stood there already feeling a little sweaty, his mouth was hanging open as he stared Mike in the eyes. “What was that?” he asked, his rib cage feeling like it was on some sort of high speed pump.

“You didn’t see?” Mike questioned, his breathing labored. “That guy over there was too close to you. Looking at you. I didn’t… I mean… he… well, I thought he wanted to dance with you. And you promised me you wouldn’t let me get lost in the dark corners of this club.” Mike was a little embarrassed now, his explanation sounding ridiculous to his ears, especially since the guy in question had already turned his attention elsewhere. 

Chester shook his head, his eyebrows squeezed together in confusion. “What?” he asked, looking around, but there was at least an arm’s length of space between them and anyone else. “What guy? Mike, it’s a club,” he stated, his hands going to his hips as he continued to breathe a little heavy, the thick club air, which was filled with heat and lingering smoke from a fog machine, was making it harder to catch his breath. “Everyone is dancing together,” he explained. “With this many people, we’re bound to bump into someone or, whatever.” 

Mike looked down at the floor, staring at Chester’s boots as he felt his cheeks grow warm. “Sorry,” he mumbled, upset that Chester thought he was over-reacting. “This isn’t really my thing, you know. But I’m trying,” he said, looking up to gauge Chester’s reaction. “I just need to relax I guess.” 

Chester’s shoulders and arms eased their staunch position and his eyes followed suit. He reached, pulling on Mike’s arm and bringing him into the foot of space between them. “Don’t be sorry,” he said. “But don’t flip out either. We’re here to have fun, remember? There’s a lot of people here, and they’re going to get close. . .but I’m here with you, okay?” 

Five weeks. It had been five of the best weeks Mike could remember, and just as Mike thought he was past that uncertain feeling he’d always had before with other guys, it showed up tonight and made him look like a possessive idiot in front of his boyfriend. _His_ boyfriend, who had done nothing wrong. “Yeah, I know. Fun, let’s get back to that,” he said, managing a smile. “We can dance now but later I’m gonna kick your ass at pool or darts, your choice.” A little bit of his confidence was coming back as he taunted Chester. He knew how much the other man hated to lose.

The music was starting and as the yellow and blue strobe lights zoomed across the dance floor, Chester looked up, eyeing the second floor of the club. “See that?” he asked as he pointed to the railing and the tables, chairs, and people they could see looking down at them. “The bar is up there. We can go sit down and get some water or a soda or something. Take a little break before we get back to the fun - and by fun I mean winning at darts. I know I have no chance beating you at pool,” he said, tugging on the front of Mike’s dress shirt, playfully. 

“You’ve got no chance beating me at darts, either, but I’m fine if that’s what you want to do.“ Mike grinned as he followed Chester’s gaze up to the second floor, then looked around for stairs. “Let’s go get that drink. Something cold sounds good. I’m following you.”

Chester held his tongue. He wanted to say a million different cocky things about his ability to beat Mike’s ass, but he wasn’t sure which would sound best. Instead he took his boyfriend’s hand, and through the crowd they went, dodging around people and the massive speakers that made their bodies vibrate as they passed them. 

Before long they were headed up a set of stairs, and then into an open room. Small, four person tables were scattered everywhere. They lined the square shaped outline that mimicked the downstairs, and to the right of the stairs was the bar. Chester headed that way, his eyes flipping over the rows of different colored bottles that made up the space behind the bar. He rested his elbows on the wooden counter as he looked to see the bartender a few people down. “What do you want?” he asked, turning to catch Mike’s close ear. The music wasn’t as loud up here, and their insides had stopped shaking, it was just their feet now that could feel the vibrations. 

Mike felt a shiver go down his spine when Chester’s breath hit his ear. His body was on high alert from the dancing and the kiss, and his boyfriend’s proximity was turning his mind away from darts and toward other things. Things they couldn’t do in a public space. “A Sprite,” he answered, even though his mind was thinking about different things he wanted. 

“So predictable,” Chester snorted, elbowing Mike a little. “I should have known.” He leaned in a little closer, brushing his lips to Mike’s cheek, just as the bartender came their way. Chester ordered their drinks - one Sprite and one Cherry Coke - before he took his wallet out and paid for both. It didn’t take long, and they were wandering around the odd shaped room, looking for a free table to sit down. 

“Don’t see anything,” Chester said as he scanned the sea of people, who were congregated at every table, and sitting in every chair. “We can go to the other side,” he said, pointing across the way toward the opposite parallel seating area. Mike nodded, and together they paced the shorter, catwalk space to get to the other side. 

There were more tables and chairs here, and Chester was quick to spot an empty one. He took Mike’s hand, and a few seconds later, they were sitting down by the railing. “You can see everyone,” Chester said, pointing down. “As long as you’re not afraid of heights. . .are you afraid of heights?” he asked, feeling almost surprised that he didn’t already know. 

“No,” Mike answered immediately. There wasn’t anything that scared him like that, no fear of heights or dogs or random food items. He didn’t like crowds, but that was really a preference more than a fear. The only thing that Mike really struggled with was trust. He knew he could blame that on his parents, but there was no need to get into that now, or ever, really. Things were just fine between him and Chester, guys in gold vests aside. “I don’t have any random phobias. Do you?” 

Chester took a drink of his soda, relishing in the coolness and the way the air wasn’t as hot up here before he set it on the table, holding it with both hands. “There are certain vegetables,” he said, keeping his eyes on the tabletop, “that I’m not totally comfortable being around. We don’t need to talk about them, and I don’t want to get into why,” he said, a shiver running through him as things like cauliflower and asparagus floated across his thoughts. “But I’m fine,” he stated quickly looking up. “It’s not a problem and I’m not weird,” he had to add, his hand going to his chest. “But other than that, nope. No phobias.” 

Mike couldn’t tell if Chester was being serious about the vegetables, but decided not to ask. He just shook his head, taking a quick sip of his Sprite as he looked around the upstairs of the club. The floor was vibrating under his feet, but the atmosphere was different in this room. He couldn’t quite put his finger on what it was, but the room felt off in some odd way. There weren’t as many people in it, for one thing, and most of them were coupled up and away from others, where in the bar area there were loud crowds of people grouped around the tables. Maybe that was all it was. It was just quieter. 

He started to lean forward, to rub his hand along Chester’s arm and assure him that scary vegetables weren’t going to be a problem for him, when some movement toward the back of the room caught his eye. Mike turned his chin to the side, peering past Chester’s ear to see what was happening behind his boyfriend. It took a minute for it to register, but then he leaned close, grabbing on to Chester’s arm. “Ches,” he said, his voice low. “It looks like… like there’s people giving _lap dances_ up here!” The shock at what he thought he was seeing was written all over his face. 

Chester’s features skewed for a second as he tried to read the freaked out look in his boyfriend’s dark eyes. He turned in his chair, glancing behind them to see two girls and one guy, the three of them dressed in barely anything, as they danced separately at three different tables. They were moving slowly; they were getting dollars shoved into their shiny undergarments. Chester smiled as he watched for a moment, before he turned back around. “Yeah, that happens over here,” he stated with a shrug. He picked up his drink and took a swallow. “So, what do you think of this music? Way different than piano lessons, I would think.” 

“Chester!” Mike admonished quietly, ignoring the music question. “You can’t just… just give lap dances out in public like this! It’s not a strip club!” He looked around quickly. “Right?”

Chester let out a sigh, his eyes rolling unintentionally. “No, it’s not a strip club,” he said, all amusement gone from his voice. “It’s just an extra perk of the club. No one is forced to sit over here,” he said, flipping his fingers over his shoulder, toward the unseen dancers. “People come over here because that’s what they want. We’re all adults,” he said dismissively. “And the dancers make good money. And, if people want more, they go in the back for it, so there’s nothing to freak over.” 

Mike’s eyes flipped to the back of the room, scanning the wall for the mysterious ‘back’ Chester was so casually speaking about. There were heavy, dark curtains in the back of the room, and Mike could just barely see the outline of a door between two of the panels. “More?” he hissed, his eyes going wide. “Do you mean people go back there for sex? With strangers?!” The whole concept was incomprehensible to Mike. Who would come to a club to hook up with someone they’d just met? 

He stared at Chester for a moment, the thought crossing his mind that his boyfriend was way too blase about all of this. “Chester. You said you come here all the time. You don’t… you haven’t… been in the back room? How do you know about it?” He could feel the panic starting to rise in his chest as his fingers squeezed tighter into Chester’s arm. He needed Chester to say something, quickly. 

“Mike,” Chester said, his free hand going out in front of him, “just calm down, okay?” He waited a minute, trying to be patient. He knew his boyfriend hadn’t been too many places, clubs included, and he tried to keep that in mind as he went on. “First of all, they aren’t strangers. You can’t go back there with just anyone. Only the dancers can take people back there. They’re like. . .independent contractors,” he said, pulling on every fancy word he had in his memory bank. “There’s, I don’t know, a dozen or maybe two? That work here. They get paid for their dances and if someone wants to go to the back, they pay a bit more. It’s all legit.” He smiled at Mike before he added, “and no, I’ve never been back there. I know one of the dancers though. Steve. He’s a good guy and he makes a good living doing it.” 

That was enough for Mike. He sat back, his eyebrows knit together in concern as he crossed his arms and looked at his boyfriend. “Chester. That’s like… prostitution. You can’t just pay people for sex. Stripping is one thing, I guess, or dancing, or whatever you want to call this,” he waved a hand toward the back of the room before tucking it back under his elbow. “I don’t care how good the money is… this isn’t right. Not in here, anyway. That’s what strip clubs are for. And this is not a strip club, you say. Which makes me question the validity of any of what’s going on up here.” 

Chester sat back, his stomach starting to boil a little. “No one here is a prostitute,” he defended quickly. “You can’t be just throwing shit words like that around, Mike.” He felt his nostrils flare for a second as he looked away, across the room. “They’re not getting paid for sex,” he said, pulling on every bit of willpower he owned to keep his voice even. “They’re paid for their time and their attention in a controlled environment. There’s a difference. And not everyone wants to work at a strip club.” He shut his eyes for a moment before he looked back at Mike, hoping that some of this would sink in. “This isn’t unusual,” he added, “this is pretty par for the course. Consenting adults enjoying themselves. And yeah, some people make a living off it, just like the bartender, or the guy who runs the lights.” 

Mike exhaled slowly, turning Chester’s words around in his head, trying to figure out what to say next. There was a nagging feeling in his stomach that he was right, but he was considering Chester’s words. After all, Chester _was_ more worldly than he was. Maybe he was just being naive about the whole situation. Still, it made him uncomfortable, and he didn’t feel like hanging around any more. It didn’t matter how adamant Chester was that what he was hearing about wasn’t prostitution - to Mike, sexual activity in exchange for money was wrong, no matter what spin was put on it, how it was labeled. He glanced at Chester, who looked as though he were prepared to argue his viewpoint for the rest of the night, and not without a bit of anger to accompany his words. This wasn’t how MIke wanted to end the night.

“Ches,” he said, sliding his hand back across the table, trying to entice Chester to grab it, “I think we should go. I mean, we aren’t here for that, so why are we up here? It makes me uncomfortable. We don’t have to agree one hundred percent on what’s happening up here, but we do both agree that it’s not right for us. Right? So let’s go. We can find something else to do, something more… acceptable.” He stopped, his palm facing up, waiting for Chester to slide their hands together and take him out of the club.

_Acceptable. . ._ “We should just go,” Chester mumbled as he stood up, shoving his chair under the table. “Come on, I’ll take you home.” 

Mike didn’t move. He was stung by Chester’s abrupt change of mood and more than a little confused. It seemed like such a clear cut issue to him. It was hard to understand what had just happened, and Mike was too stubborn to just go home without a resolution to the problem at hand. “Chester. I don’t want to go home. It’s early. I was just thinking we could go somewhere else. Somewhere where this kind of stuff isn’t happening.” He tried to catch Chester’s eyes but he was looking away from him, staring over the railing and looking downstairs. “Or maybe just go back downstairs, we could dance some more.” Mike really didn’t want to dance, or stay in the club for that matter, but he was starting to feel a little desperate. He didn’t know where he’d screwed up, but it was obvious he had. 

“I don’t feel like dancing anymore,” Chester said, his eyes never leaving where he was staring a hole into one of the large speakers on the first floor. “I’m not feeling the best. I’m just going to take you home.” He turned away and headed in the same direction they’d come. He was ready to leave, not just the club, but the whole conversation. _He’s so narrow minded. How he can just call people prostitutes like that...he doesn’t even know them. He doesn’t know anything about any of this, and he’s calling them that. He’s looking down on them without the slightest clue about anything. People have to do what they have to do. God, out of everyone in the world, you’d think he’d get that Mr. I-live-with-beauty-school-girl-because-I-can’t-afford-my-own-place._ He got to the other side, and was already headed down the stairs, assuming Mike was right behind him, even though in the heat of the moment, he didn’t really care. He needed some fresh air. He needed to be away from the people and the pounding music. He needed to escape. 

Mike watched Chester walk away, feeling his heart sinking with every step. Somehow, without meaning to, he’d crossed a line, and Chester was leaving without him. As his mind scrambled backwards through the last several minutes of their conversation, he tried to figure out what he’d said to upset Chester so much, but it all seemed so black and white. _Maybe he’s upset because he thinks I called his friend a prostitute. I mean, I did, and I’ll apologize, but I don’t want to come back here._ Mike stood up, quickly following behind Chester, who hadn’t even bothered to see if he was coming. _Maybe I was too harsh. Maybe he’s right, that these people know what they’re getting into when they come here. It was just shocking to me because I didn’t know._

The entire walk through the club and out to the car, Chester didn’t look back or say a word. Mike felt like he was a puppy just tagging along after his owner. He waited until they were in the car before he tried to say anything more. Swallowing his pride a little, he tried, “hey, I’m sorry I upset you. I didn’t know you had a friend working there when I freaked out. I’m sure he’s a great guy.” 

“He is,” Chester answered almost immediately as he kept his eyes on the road, his hands gripped around the steering wheel. He hated this. He hated feeling this way, and he hated arguing with Mike. Usually they got along so well, so seamlessly, so it was extra unsettling as he stole a glance over at his boyfriend through the darkened car. “He’s a good guy, and I don’t think he deserves to be put down for what he’s doing to make ends meet. Everyone does what they need to. And. . .” He stopped himself, pressing his lips shut. 

“I’m sorry,” Mike said again, desperately wanting to right what had gone wrong back at the club. “I guess I was just… surprised. I didn’t mean for it to come across personally.” 

“There’s a lot of bad people out there, Mike. People who do really bad things and treat desperate people like shit. But Dance L.A. isn’t one of them. Their people are treated well, or at least that’s what Steve tells me. No one does anything they don’t want to do, and. . .” he stopped again, his hand reflexively going to the side of his face, shielding his peripheral vision on Mike’s side, “and it’s not fair to call them unacceptable. No, that’s not for you and me and our relationship, but some people enjoy it. And there’s nothing wrong with liking it either way. If you think that’s unacceptable. . .then. . .” he stopped again. He wasn’t sure what else to say. He’d heard Mike apologize, but the blow of his words had sunk in deep, and Chester was having a hard time shaking them. 

“I didn’t say the _people_ were unacceptable,” Mike countered, afraid of where Chester’s words were headed. “It’s like you said, it’s not right for you and me and our relationship. I meant that I wanted to go somewhere that was acceptable to us, and what we wanted. I wasn’t talking about the people, Ches, please… I’m sorry I called it prostitution. I don’t know, I’m just not used to that sort of thing. If you say that everyone is consenting and knows what they’re doing, then I guess that’s okay. I just don’t want _us_ to be around that. I want those kinds of things to only be between us.” The street lights weren’t coming in the windows much, and Mike couldn’t see much of Chester’s face as they drove. He could only wait and hope that maybe what he’d said had dissolved some of the anger he’d heard in his boyfriend’s voice. 

It wasn’t until Chester pulled into the parking spot in front of Mike’s apartment that he let out a long sigh. “I’m sorry, too,” he mumbled, keeping his eyes fixed on the speedometer that was reading zero miles per hour, the car safely sitting in park. “It’s a hard subject, Mike,” he admitted as he turned his head to look at his boyfriend for the first time. “I can get really defensive about it. I’ve got friends in the business, and. . .I hate to hear people say nasty things about them. Don’t hold this against clubs,” he added as he tried to smile, “not all of them have a back room. Just the good ones,” he said, letting his lips curl for real and hoping his joke would come across as funny and not some bash against Mike’s feelings. It was a defense mechanism, in the most primal form. 

Mike smiled, relieved that Chester seemed to be coming back to himself. He couldn’t bear the thought of going home mad at each other. “I guess we’ll just have to go to a bad club, next time,” he tossed back lightly, hoping Chester would take that comment in the same spirit as he’d spoken his own.

Chester nodded. “Or, maybe we just won’t be club people. We can buy some strobe lights for the loft and dance there instead.” He reached his hand over, hoping Mike would take it as he said, “we can get naked dancing going on there.” 

“Now _that_ sounds like my kind of scene,” Mike said, his voice teasing. “Just you and me, nobody bumping into us or making eyes at you. I’m in.” He slid his hand into Chester’s squeezing it tightly. “We’ll have to make that a future project - turning your bedroom into a private club.” He looked at Chester, at the side of his face illuminated by the light from the parking lot, and bit his lip. He wasn’t sure if he should try to kiss him or not, but he looked so kissable in that moment.

Even in the barely lit space, Mike’s big brown eyes were on full display, his hand and touch warm and familiar. Safe. And Chester felt the last bit of wall he’d thrown up during their argument tumble down. He leaned over, his eyes closing as he felt his lips connect with Mike’s. He felt the other man’s warmth - not just physically, but there was something more as they shared the intimate act. Something that brought an ease to Chester’s mind as a small voice in his head assured him that everything was going to be okay. 

Soaking up the affection from the other man, Mike felt all of the worry and concern from the last hour fade away. Chester’s kisses had a way of doing that, of making him forget everything else in the tender, gentle heat. When Chester pulled away and Mike opened his eyes, he just needed one more thing, one last reassurance before he could go inside and go to sleep. “We’re okay?” he asked softly, stroking a fingertip down the dark side of Chester’s face.

“Yeah,” Chester answered, leaning his head into Mike’s touch. “We’re okay.”


	8. Cinnamon Rolls and Rejection

Dave tapped his fingers on the table in front of him as he perused the menu. He was waiting for his best friend to join him at their favorite cheap Italian cafe, a local hole in the wall they’d been visiting since high school. It wasn’t like Mike Shinoda to be late to anything - ever - but he’d been more distracted than Dave had ever known him to be lately. He couldn’t wait to hear about the new guy that had turned his level headed and always punctual friend’s life upside down. This new guy, this Chester, really had to be something for Mike to be so hung up on him already. Dave had gotten some brief details via text message, and a few more in Mike’s hasty visit to borrow a shirt last week, but he wanted the full low down. That’s what this lunch was all about. 

Just as the redhead glanced away from his menu to check his watch again, he caught sight of Mike hurrying in the door of the cafe, his blue streaked hair windblown, his backpack over both shoulders of his open purple flannel shirt. There was a wrinkle of concern between his eyes as he scanned the room, and then his face dissolved into an apology as he spotted Dave in the corner.

“I’m sorry I’m late!” Mike exclaimed as he slid into the low-backed booth across from his friend, shoving his backpack down on the bench next to him. “The mom of my last student kept asking me questions about her progress and practice and I didn’t get out the studio on time.” 

Dave shook his head and handed Mike a menu with a smile. “No worries. I haven’t even decided what I want yet. It’s good to see you, man.” They lapsed into the comfortable silence of long-time buddies as they contemplated their lunch options. After Dave ordered his spaghetti and meatballs, and Mike ordered his baked five cheese ziti, requesting extra Parmesan grated on the top, they passed off the menus and looked at each other.

As the waitress retreated, Mike reached for one of the breadsticks she’d left behind, and asked, “how’s school going?” He was curious if Dave was still enjoying college. He’d been thinking about giving it a try more and more lately, but the expense was enough to keep him hesitating, all the while adding more students to try to save up some money. 

But college life was not what Dave wanted to talk about. Preparing for finals was draining, and the future math teacher wasn’t interested in discussing the ins and outs of Advanced Calculus. He waved his hand in front of him and said, “oh no, you don’t. School’s fine, but don’t try to put me off. I want to hear about this boyfriend you’re hiding from me. Tell me everything - including when I get to meet him.” He folded his hands on the drab brown table top in front of him and pierced Mike with his green eyes expectantly, watching as his friend’s entire body lit up with excitement.

“I don’t even know where to start,” Mike admitted, his eyes unfocused and far away as he contemplated the last six weeks of his life. Six weeks had passed since he’d met Chester, the best six weeks of his nineteen years. He leaned to the side and reached into his pocket for his phone. “That’s him - Chester,” he said, holding the older iphone in front of him so Dave could see the lock screen. It was a selfie he and Chester had taken one afternoon on the Santa Monica pier, the ocean in the background and the sun on their faces. He loved the picture because he’d been mesmerized by the image of his boyfriend’s wide grin as he took it, completely oblivious to Chester holding two fingers up behind his head. Chester had teased him relentlessly for the rest of the day about how easy it was to distract him, and Mike had been unable to argue. It always felt as though his entire world narrowed to just Chester when they were together.

“He’s… not what I expected.” Dave’s eyes ran over Chester’s red mohawk, the plugs in his ears, and the lip ring before he glanced over at Mike with a raised eyebrow. “You’ve always gone for more the more traditional look.”

Mike sipped the water that had appeared with the breadsticks before he responded, “I know… but Chester’s just… different. There was something about him from the moment I saw him at Joe’s. It was magnetic.” There was a disbelieving chuckle and the flash of a grin, and then he went on, “you’re right, though, we are total opposites in most ways. Every single time we’re together is an adventure. I never know what’s going to happen.”

“Have you made it back to Joe’s karate class with him?” Dave asked, laughing at the look of disgust on Mike’s face. It was hard to imagine his friend in a karate class, since he always appeared in his standard uniform of a flannel shirt and jeans. “You got a gi in your closet at home now?”

“God, no. That whole scene wasn’t for me. Besides, Chester’s got the whole karate thing down. Sometimes he’ll show me stuff at his place, saves me from having to be in a room full of sweaty people.” Mike shuddered at the thought. “Don’t tell Joe that, I don’t want him to think Chester’s trying to steal his job or anything.” 

Dave rolled his eyes. “Chester doesn’t look like a person who’d be teaching karate. Not that I’m judging him by his appearance,” Dave rushed to say. “What’s he do, anyway?” Something like confusion slid quickly across Mike’s face, and Dave caught the expression, his radar gong on alert. 

“He does something with video production, I’m not entirely sure what,” Mike admitted, his fingers starting to fidget with the button on the cuff of his left sleeve. “Every time it comes up we end up talking about other things and I get totally distracted. I’m not sure if he’s an editor or a camera guy, or what, but whatever his job is, he’s doing pretty well for himself. Awesome place down by the ocean and a car that puts mine to shame.” Mike looked at Dave and for a moment, he let his doubt shine through. “I keep thinking I’m going to wake up and it will all have been a dream, that it’s too good to be true. This is the longest I’ve gone out with the same guy, you know. And he’s so… perfect.”

There was a pause as Mike looked around the busy cafe, gauging how loud he could talk, and he leaned over the table, closer to his friend. “He’s everything, Dave. He’s smart, he’s successful, he makes me laugh… I have so much fun when we’re together, it’s like I’m someone else. He makes me want to do things, go places, try new things… and,” he said, his voice dropping even lower, “he’s so fucking hot on top of all of that. I mean… I’ve never been with anyone like him before. Ever.” 

There was a secret smile playing across Mike’s lips as Dave looked at him curiously. “You sound like you’ve fallen pretty hard, Mikey. I hope you’ve done your research on this guy.” 

With just a moment’s hesitation, Mike said, “yeah. I mean, I’ve been good, taking it slow, like always…”

Dave noticed Mike was picking at his sleeve again, and he prodded, “but?” He watched the piano teacher as his brow furrowed. “Oh my God, Mike. Did you sleep with him?”

Mike’s eyes shot up to meet Dave’s, his mouth dropping open. “No! Not yet! I mean… I don’t know how to explain it. It’s not like he’s pressuring me or anything, though I did have to really slow things down in the beginning… you know, I’ve never felt comfortable enough with anyone to _go all the way_.” Mike’s voice dropped to a whisper as he leaned across the table closer to Dave again. “But I think… I think this might be it, that he might be the one.”

Dave sat back, trying to read his friend’s body language. Mike hadn’t said anything negative about the guy, but he hadn’t said much specific, either, and he had to wonder how well Mike really knew Chester at this point. They had always talked about the guys Mike dated, and those “relationships” had ended quickly when all they wanted from his friend was a quick romp in bed. From the sound of it, Chester had wanted the same thing, so what had made Mike stick it out with this guy, after dumping all the others? “Really? What makes you think that? That he’s ‘the one’?” Dave wiggled his fingers in the air, making quotations around his last words.

There was another pause, and Mike’s whole demeanor changed to something soft, something tender as he spoke. “He’s so caring, Dave. At first, I totally admit it, I was so attracted to his body.” Mike blushed as he remembered how in awe he’d been the first time he saw Chester. It had been a complete rush of physical attraction, the desire to meet the other man based off nothing but appearance. In the past six weeks, though, that desire had morphed into something else, something deeper for Mike. He loved Chester’s laugh, the way his eyes crinkled when he smiled, the way he cooked and the way his hands felt on every part of his body… and the way he kissed. _God, his kisses are amazing. It’s like I’m floating on air, or happiness, or… I don’t know. I just know that I’ve never been kissed the way Chester kisses me, ever._

Mike blew out a long breath and looked Dave steadily in the eyes. “He’s let me have all the control, physically. At any point I want to stop things, he’ll stop… and I can tell it’s hard for him, but it doesn’t get weird. He’s kept coming back, even when I’ve said I’m not ready for more. Nobody has ever been like that before. Cared about how I feel,” Mike clarified. _And he didn’t drop me when I told him I was a virgin. If anything, it’s made him more patient with me, and that just makes him even more amazing._ “I… I just think about him all the time. I want to spend every second I can with him. That’s huge, right? Isn’t that how it’s supposed to be?”

Something about the way Mike tiptoed around his physical relationship with Chester didn’t settle well in Dave’s mind. “How do you know he’s not just manipulating you to get what he wants?” 

“For six weeks? Who waits around six weeks if they aren’t looking for something more, something deeper,” Mike countered. “You certainly never have.”

“Touche!” Dave sat back, a tentative smile on his face. “I’ve never had to wait long, the girls just throw themselves at me.” Mike rolled his eyes and took another bite out of his breadstick. “Seriously, though, I know what a big deal it is for you to trust someone,” Dave said, watching Mike carefully. “I just want to know this guy is worth it. I don’t want this mohawked, pierced, movie-producing karate guru to fuck you over. He just looks…” Dave’s voice trailed off as the waitress re-appeared, placing a steaming dish in front of each of them. Once she walked away, Dave finished, “he looks a lot more street smart than you, Mike. I don’t want you to be taken advantage of… your heart is just too good to be broken like that.”

Mike smiled as he picked up his fork. “I promise you, you’ll meet Chester, and you’ll see. Once you get past the initial bravado, he’s so sweet. Genuinely, not because he wants something out of me.” He poked into his ziti, gobs of cheese stringing out between his fork and his dish as he brought the first bite to his lips. “Besides, how can I go wrong with someone who loves cheese as much as I do?” 

“Okay, okay,” Dave gave in as he twirled his spaghetti around his fork. “Just promise me, you’ll be careful, you’ll be certain, okay? I don’t want to see you get hurt.”

As he took the first bite of his lunch, Mike closed his eyes, an image of Chester’s face over a plate of cheesy nachos filling his mind. “I’ve know what I’m doing, Dave, finally. He’s perfect, and it’s going to be fine. You’ll see.”

*****

Chester flung the gray and white dish towel over his shoulder as he stood in the kitchen, his butt leaning against the edge of the counter as he looked across his apartment. The sun was on its way down, the last bits of twilight coming through the large windows as Mike sat on the couch, his eyes glued to the television. 

Chester smiled as he focused on the back of Mike’s head, the way the low light in the living room was giving the man’s blue hair a darker shade at the moment. He could see his boyfriend’s earrings as they dangled and jiggled everytime Mike moved his head. After dinner, a documentary had caught the younger man’s attention, and he hadn’t moved from the couch since. Chester didn’t mind. Over the last six weeks, he’d gotten used to Mike being around, and the other man’s company had become a sort of comfort - a mix of adventure and normality. Chester had never really had anyone to just hang out with at home, someone to spend random time with. Someone to goof around with while still having the perks of making out. Someone who liked to be around, just to be around. But Mike was turning out to be the perfect person to fill that role. _I guess this is what being a boyfriend really is. God, it’s been so long, I kind of forgot what it’s like._

So as Mike watched his documentary about the lifecycle of the Asian Crusted Starfish, Chester used the time to clean up the dinner dishes and to break open a canister of cinnamon rolls, which were now in the oven; they’d be done any minute. The sweet smell of brown sugar and hot cinnamon had already flooded the loft space, and as it did, Chester’s mind moved to something else. 

He opened the refrigerator and eyed the jug of orange juice he’d picked up on his way home from work. He sat it on the counter just as the stove dinged. He spun around, grabbed his lobster claw oven mitt, and opened the door. His stomach groaned. They smelled so good. He sat them on top of the oven, and turned everything off. _They need to cool for a few minutes and then I can ice them._

He glanced up, his eyes bouncing from the back of Mike’s head, to the television before he turned and opened one of the white cabinet doors. He studied his collection of glasses - wine glasses, and a set of four shot glasses. He had ones made just for scotch and martinis, and some for champagne. _Those will work._ He took down two, before he opened another cabinet to retrieve the bottle of tequila his boss had handed him a few hours ago. Now he just had to find the grenadine, which he knew was hiding somewhere in this kitchen, and he could make tequila sunrises to go with their dessert. 

“Ches?” Mike called from the couch, his eyes still on the television. “Those cinnamon rolls ready? They smell amazing.”

A grin was already stretched across Chester’s face. “Almost!” he hollered over his shoulder as he finally found the small red bottle of sweet cherry grenadine. “I still have to ice them,” he said as he flipped around and pulled a butter knife from one of the drawers. A tune drifted across his mind, and as he layered the hot treats with their finishing touch, he hummed along and tapped his foot. 

 

The documentary ended and Mike stood up, stretching his arms over his head before he pulled the hem of his shirt down and stepped toward the kitchen, toward the enticing smell of warm cinnamon rolls. He slid behind Chester and watched as he spread icing over the cinnamon rolls, and before he could stop himself, he reached out and dipped his finger into the little tub of icing, daring Chester to complain about it as he lifted the finger to his mouth and tasted it.

“Mmmm, that’s so good. Hurry up,” he said, smiling playfully at Chester. 

“I should ban you from my kitchen,” Chester said, narrowing his eyes at his boyfriend, but only for a second. “But I don’t think it would work.” He watched as Mike made a goofy expression before he pointed at the jug of orange juice and the bottle of alcohol sitting close by. “Look what I got for us. I can make us tequila sunrises to go with dessert.” 

Mike glanced over and saw the glasses waiting for Chester to fill them. “Tequila? How did you get tequila?” He leaned over and looked at the label. Mike wasn’t an expert in alcohol, but the label was fancy and he figured it wasn’t a cheap bottle.

Chester walked the champagne flutes to the refrigerator to fill them with ice. “My boss gave it to me today after work.” 

With a quirked eyebrow, Mike looked back at Chester, skepticism written all over his face. “Why would your boss give you tequila? Doesn’t he know how old you are?”

Chester glanced across the kitchen, catching Mike’s questioning stare. “Of course he does,” he said, ready to change the subject. “He’s a nice guy. It’s been a hard couple of days is all, and it’s just his way of thanking me for being a team player. It’s no big deal.” 

Something in Chester’s voice sounded defensive, but Mike dismissed it, picking up the bottle and looking at it. _I’ve never had tequila. But it can’t be that much different from having a beer, especially if he’s mixing it with something else. Orange juice. I mean, juice is good for you, right?_ “Well, okay,” he agreed, setting down the bottle and picking up the plate of cinnamon rolls. “I’ll just take these to the couch while you worry about that. You definitely don’t want me trying to make drinks. I’ll try to wait for you.” He leaned and kissed Chester on the cheek before he disappeared back to the couch to wait for his boyfriend to join him.

Chester watched as Mike ran away with the cinnamon rolls. _Gotta hurry this along if I want any of those._ He quickly poured equal parts of tequila and orange juice into each glass before he added a bright red stream of grenadine to each, the crimson cloud settling onto the bottom of the glasses, giving them the sunrise look. Chester quickly put the juice back in the refrigerator before he took both glasses to the couch. 

“For you, Sexy Boy,” he said, handing Mike his drink before he sat down next to him. “Now, hand over one of those rolls.” 

Mike scooted the plate over toward Chester and took a tentative sip of his drink. It mostly tasted like orange juice, but the alcohol surprised him a little bit, and he tried to cover the cough that followed after he swallowed. “That’s pretty good,” he managed, his eyes watering a bit. “There’s like, cherry in there too?”

“It’s grenadine at the bottom,” Chester said, tapping his champagne flute, his half-eaten cinnamon roll squeezed between his fingers. He eyed Mike for a minute before he added, “grenadine is just cherry yumminess. It’s the same stuff they put in Cherry Coke and Pepsi.” 

With a nod, Mike took another sip, this one a little bit bigger. It tasted fine, once he got past the tequila. If he’d made it there would be more orange juice and less tequila, but he could drink it. He didn’t want Chester to know he was as inexperienced with alcohol as he was everything else. _Add this to the list of things Chester just knows about that I don’t. Sometimes I wonder what exactly it is that he sees in me._

Mike set the champagne flute down and picked another cinnamon roll off the plate. “I could eat every single one of these,” he declared right before he took a huge bite. 

“They’re good but sticky,” Chester whined as he took a large gulp from his glass before he set it on the coffee table. “Gotta wash my hands,” he said, flipping his icing smeared fingers through the air before he headed for the bathroom. He could already feel the alcohol crawling through him, his face flushing with heat and his steps a little uneven. He took a deep breath as he washed his hands quickly, glancing at himself in the mirror, double checking that his mohawk was on point, and he didn’t have any icing hiding along the corners of his mouth. He dried his hands before he smoothed out the front of his black t-shirt that had a giant blue butterfly on the front of it, his eyes drifting down to his matching socks. He wiggled his toes, making the butterflies on his feet look like they were flying. “Mike!” he hollered as he headed back to the couch. “You gotta see this,” he said as he pointed to his feet. “Look! My butterflies are flying!” 

With his thumb upside down in his mouth, Mike looked down at Chester’s feet and smiled as his licked the frosting off. “You’re ridiculous,” he teased, sliding a different finger into his mouth and licking that one clean too. He was satisfied he’d gotten all the frosting and reached for his drink. “You need to stop me before I eat another one. I don’t need another cinnamon roll.” 

Chester shrugged his shoulders as he made his way past Mike’s legs, swiping the dish of cinnamon rolls as he went. “More for me,” he snickered as he sat back down. He pulled one from the tray, before he set them back on the coffee table. “This is probably my limit,” he said, making sure he held this one with just his fingertips around the drippy parts of the icing. “They’re good, but fucking messy.” He downed another gulp from his drink before he looked over at Mike to see his reaction. It had become his worst habit, always needing to know what Mike would say next. 

Without realizing it, Mike had finished his drink, and he set the glass on the table, his arms feeling a little heavy. “They’re really messy. And you _just_ washed your hands. What am I going to do with you?” He slid closer to Chester, taking his free hand and holding it in front of his face. “Do I need to inspect you for frosting?”

Chester busted into laughter. “You do what you have to,” he said, killing off the last of his drink. “But hang on, I’ll get us a refill.” He leaned over, placing a sloppy kiss on Mike’s face before he got to his feet. His head rushed a little and he had stop to regain his balance before he took both their glasses and the plate of cinnamon rolls to the kitchen. He was back to humming as he re-poured everything. “So, what do you want to do now?” he asked, as he capped the orange juice and put it away before he headed back to the couch.

Mike grinned, feeling a little silly all of a sudden. “I want you to come here,” he said, patting the couch next to him. “I’ll take that.” He swiped the second drink from Chester’s hand and took a big sip, looking up at his boyfriend. “You make good drinks.” Everything felt warm inside him, and everything seemed a little tilty around him, but Chester looked the same as always. “Come here,” he said again, holding out his hand.

Mike’s big brown eyes were looking up at him, and Chester took his hand, even as he stayed standing up. “Okay, but hang on. It’s hot in here, don’t you think?” He pulled away and set his still full glass down on the coffee table before he walked over and shoved one of the windows open, just enough to let the night breeze flow in. It was heavenly as Chester stood there for a moment, letting the fresh, cooler air swirl around him. 

He turned back around to see Mike wiggling a finger at him. “I’m coming,” Chester chuckled as he made his way back and flopped down beside his boyfriend. “Okay, you got me. Now what?” 

Without hesitation, Mike tugged at Chester’s shirt. “If you’re hot, just take this off,” he suggested, giggling at himself. He didn’t even wait for Chester to agree with him, and his hands touched over the blue butterfly for a second before he pulled the t-shirt off and flung it to the floor beside the couch. “There. That’s so much better,” he breathed, leaning close and kissing the little dip in Chester’s collarbone, his hands going around his boyfriend’s back. “Feel better now?”

“Yeah,” Chester answered, even as his pulse quickened. It was the first time Mike had ever taken such a bold move, and Chester was pretty sure it was drunken bravery that was responsible, which was just fine by him. “But now you’re overdressed.” He let his fingers stray over the white t-shirt that was hiding under Mike’s open flannel shirt. “You’ve got on way too much. I’m not sure how you’re not burning up.” He was already rubbing one of Mike’s nipples through the shirt, feeling the little nub harden. Chester shifted a little closer, licking his tongue over his dry lips.

For just a moment, Mike closed his eyes, but that made the world spin and he giggled, his lips still pressed to Chester’s warm skin. “You want me to take off my clothes?” he suggested, giggling again. “I can’t dance as well as you do.” 

He sat back, swaying just a bit even though he was sitting down. “Whoa.” It wasn’t easy, unbuttoning the cuffs of his shirt as Chester watched him, laughing as Mike grew frustrated with the buttons. “I don’t… I can’t… fuck!” he exclaimed, tugging the cuff of the shirt over his hand without unbuttoning it, then pulling his other arm out of the other side, turning the sleeve inside out. “There! See? I can do stuff,” he said, looking at Chester very seriously. 

“I know you can,” Chester snorted. “I think maybe you’re drunk,” he chuckled as he reached over and cupped Mike’s knee. “You’re such a lightweight.” 

“I’m not!” Mike exclaimed, fussing with his t-shirt. “I’m fine. See?” With that, he pulled off his t-shirt and dropped it on the floor, next to Chester’s. It didn’t even bother him that he was shirtless as he scooted back over to Chester, dropping his face into the curve of Chester’s neck and placing little kisses on his shoulder. “I’m fine. You’re fine. I’m not drunk.”

“Mhm, keep telling yourself that,” Chester said, his eyes going a bit wide with a slowed response. “You just took your undershirt off,” he said, his hand reaching to smooth over Mike’s exposed stomach, his fingertips drinking in the warm, soft skin. “It’s, like, a miracle or something,” he said with a soft chuckle before he closed his eyes. Mike’s lips were still on his neck. “That feels good though.” His head went to the side, leaving more room for his boyfriend to take full advantage of the open real estate. 

Even though he felt a little dizzy, Mike shifted closer, pressing Chester back into the arm of the couch as he kissed up his neck and across his chin, finally landing on soft, warm lips. He felt Chester’s hand skim up his side and into his hair, and Mike snaked his tongue out to trace Chester’s bottom lip, toying with his lip ring for a moment before the kiss deepened. The faint sweetness of icing and the slight taste of alcohol was enticing as they kissed, and Mike felt like he was ready for more. He felt just a little bit out of control at the moment, but it was okay. After all, they’d been dating for six weeks now, and it was time to let go just a little bit. 

He let his hands trace over Chester’s sides as they kissed, feeling along his skin until he met the waistband of his jeans. For just a moment, he pulled away from their kiss, his head spinning, wondering if he should just go for it and get rid of the rest of Chester’s clothes. In a flash of bravery, Mike bit his lip and reached for Chester’s belt. _I’m ready for this. But maybe not right here. Maybe I can make it upstairs._

“Ches?” he murmured, pulling on the end of Chester’s belt. “Why don’t we move this upstairs?” 

Chester was practically on his back, looking up at Mike fiddling unsuccessfully with his belt. His hand went down to meet Mike’s, his fingers lingering down to touch the erection that had already been growing under the denim. “Upstairs?” he repeated, his eyes partially closed. “Okay.” He went to sit up, pushing Mike back as he did, both their bodies moving in slow motion as they stood up. Chester reached for Mike’s hand. “You better let me lead, or your drunk ass will fall down the stairs,” he said, repressing the massive grin that wanted to pop off his face before he tugged Mike toward the bedroom staircase. 

The floor tilted a bit as Mike took a step behind Chester. “Wait,” he said, his other hand going out to grab Chester’s arm to steady himself. He took a deep breath and looked at the floor, which seemed to be moving under his feet. “Okay. Go slow.”

With Chester’s laugh reaching his ears, Mike smiled a bit and let himself be led to the small staircase, carefully placing one foot in front of the other. “Chesterrrr,” he drawled, amusement in his voice, “you’re _so hot._ I could just eat you up.” 

Chester got them to the top of the steps before he glanced over his shoulder. “You can eat any part of me you want, Sexy Boy,” he said, flashing a smile before he pulled Mike all the way to the edge of the bed. His arms wrapped around the other man’s neck, their lips connecting immediately. Chester’s brain was on its way to autopilot as he let his eyes sink closed. He pushed his tongue into Mike’s mouth. The wet, hot sensation was welcomed as he pressed his hips forward. 

The combination of desire and alcohol had completely eliminated any reservations Mike still had about sex with Chester. Everything in his body was screaming at him to go for it, whatever ‘it’ was going to be. Mike slid his hands down Chester’s back and grabbed on to his ass with both hands, pulling their bodies together even harder than Chester had, moaning into their kiss as he felt his hard dick come into contact with Chester’s. There were too many layers between them, he decided somewhere in his mind, and it was time to take care of that.

He pulled away from their kiss, dropping unsteadily to his knees in front of Chester and reaching for his belt again. This time he was going to get it off, there was no stopping him. Mike’s fingers were uncoordinated, a little bit numb, and he fumbled with the buckle for a moment before he got it undone, smiling up at Chester proudly. “Look at what I can do.” Before Chester could answer, he pulled on the button on his jeans, popping them open and sliding the zipper down. _That was much easier than that damn belt,_ he thought, wiggling the jeans down just enough to lean forward and press a kiss to the blue butterflies that were covering Chester’s erection.

Chester’s hands were in Mike’s hair, teasing every strand as he let the other man yank his jeans down. His head went back the moment he felt Mike’s lips touch his sensitive area. Even though sex wasn’t something they’d managed yet in their six weeks of dating, blow jobs had become a regular activity between them, and Mike was good at them. He’d managed to decipher the code to Chester’s pleasure, and as Mike kissed all over the front of Chester’s black and blue underwear, he could already feel himself growing wet with pre-cum. “Mike,” he half-said and half-moaned, “let me get out of these jeans.” 

Mike dragged his hands down the front of Chester’s thighs slowly before he sat back on his heels, rocking slightly for a moment before he fell backwards onto his ass. With his arms out to the sides to steady himself, Mike laughed as he watched Chester from the floor.

“Your goofy ass is soooo drunk,” Chester chuckled as he tried to get out of his jeans, his balance off and _bam!_ he hit the floor. He broke into laughter as he sat next to Mike. “Maybe I am, too,” he offered before he leaned forward and wrestled with the legs of his jeans that just didn’t want to let him go. He tugged at them as Mike sat close, snorting like a pig as he watched. “Go ahead,” Chester said, finally getting both legs free. “I want to see you do better,” he teased as he carefully stood himself up. He reached down, and Mike took his hand, and now they were on their feet. “I’m going to be over here, waiting,” Chester said as he pointed toward the bed. He smacked Mike on the ass before he crawled onto the bed, his head a little light as he laid down on his back. 

“I’ve got this,” Mike said with drunken confidence, smirking at Chester as he went for his belt. It only took him a few tries to get it unbuckled, then another attempt or two with the button and zipper of his jeans before he slid them down, wiggling his hips side to side as Chester watched him from the bed. “Oops,” he giggled, catching himself with one hand on the side of the bed as he stumbled forward, trying to get his leg out of his jeans. “I’ve got this,” he repeated, trying to balance himself and get naked at the same time.

It wasn’t easy but he eventually freed himself from the offending denim and crawled up on to the bed, right to where Chester was waiting in the center. _God, he’s so fuckin’ hot. I want everything, everything with him. I’m ready._ Their eyes met as he slid one knee over Chester’s body and settled himself down, tracing his fingertips over Chester’s stomach as he straddled him. He could feel the heat and the anticipation flowing off Chester in waves.

Chester’s hands went right to Mike’s thighs. He slid them up toward the waistband of the other man’s boxer briefs. He bucked his hips, sending an extra jolt of pressure between their covered erections. “I guess you did okay with that,” he said, his eyes partly closed as he smiled. “I didn’t time you or anything, but I think you might have been faster than me.” 

“Maybe,” Mike agreed, stretching his legs behind him as he lowered himself down, letting his entire body drape over Chester’s and taking the opportunity to return the favor of pressing his hips down, shuddering at the contact. Everything about the moment felt right. Chester’s hands, which had moved up to rub circles on his back. The intoxicating smell of Chester’s body wash combined with the lingering cinnamon scent from downstairs. The warmth and length of their bodies pressed together, and the satisfied little sounds coming from Chester’s lips as Mike kissed across his chest. Mike slid his hands up, cupping Chester’s face as he balanced carefully on his elbows, and dropped his lips down to steal another long kiss from his boyfriend.

Chester sucked in Mike’s kiss, and as his body tingled for more, he opened his legs. He spread them apart, allowing Mike to fit right in between. Now their cocks were lined up slightly differently. Chester sent his hands down, reaching for as much of Mike’s ass as he could get to as they rocked back and forth. The heat of the moment - the panting and the long kiss that was now quick kisses switched back and forth - was escalating. Chester’s dick was screaming for air - screaming to be let out of the confines of his underwear, and as Mike continually pressed into him over and over again, Chester’s foggy mind tried to process what was next. This wasn’t the normal way they got to blow jobs or even hand jobs. This was more, and it felt good. 

With every bit of courage he had, Mike moved his kisses down Chester’s jaw, landing right at his ear, taking a moment to nibble the delicate lobe before he breathed into Chester’s ear, “I’m ready, Ches. I want you.” He held his breath, waiting, his mind still spinning, maybe from the alcohol or maybe from anticipation, he wasn’t sure which. 

Chester’s eyes rolled opened, his slightly blurry gaze hitting the spinning ceiling fan overhead. “Ready?” he whispered, his body suddenly feeling a different kind of stiffness. After weeks of dating Mike Shinoda, Chester had figured out that he didn’t always read the right meaning into what his boyfriend said sometimes. “Ready, like. . .?” 

“Ready. I’m ready, I _want_ more. I want you to show me... I’m ready for us to have sex,” he managed to say, as directly as he could say it, leaving no room for Chester to interpret what he wanted. It was black and white, as clear as he could make it. Mike raised up on his elbows for a moment, catching Chester’s gaze. 

“Mike,” Chester started, his mind and his penis in a knockout fight as he spun his words together, “you’re pretty drunk. I, I mean, this might not be right. Not that I don’t want to,” he added quickly as he brought his hands from Mike’s ass and back up to his sides, massaging the other man’s ribs gently. “God, you feel so good,” he mumbled without his good senses permission. That wasn’t going to help anything. 

A little bit of confusion settled over Mike as he watched Chester struggle with his words. “I’m not so drunk that I don’t know I want this. I’ve been thinking about it, not just tonight. I know I’m ready,” he stated again, his bottom lip poking out just a bit as he frowned slightly. 

Chester had to look away from him. If he stared up into that face - Mike’s adorable face and puppy dog eyes - he’d cave. He’d let something happen that couldn’t happen right now. If this went any further, things were going to get complicated, and there wasn’t room for that while his boyfriend was drunk and offering up his virginity. 

Chester dropped his hands to Mike’s arms. “Let’s sit up,” he said, keeping his eyes averted. 

Mike’s heart dropped a little bit, allowing himself to be moved to the side as Chester sat up. It just wasn’t in him to sit up at the moment, and he rolled over onto his stomach, burying his face in Chester’s sheets. _He’s telling me no. I’m not that drunk. I don’t think._

Chester looked down at himself, at his wilting cock and the sick feeling that was following it. “Mike,” he said as he turned to see his boyfriend looking crushed. _Dammit. Fuck!_ “Mike,” he said again, keeping his voice light as he reached over and put his hand on the other man’s lower back. “I’m not saying we can’t. Just not tonight. If we do this now, it won’t be good.” 

With his face still in the sheets, Mike said again, “but… I’m not drunk. I promise.” Except that he was, and now that his face was connected to the soft flannel of Chester’s bedsheets, he suddenly felt very sleepy. He turned his face, rubbing his cheek along with flannel and looked over at Chester. “Don’t you want me?”

“Oh, god, yes,” Chester said immediately, his tongue acting on instinct. “I do,” he whispered, his fingers feathering back and forth over Mike’s skin. “But. . .this can’t be how we do this the first time,” he stated with a swallow. His eyes drifted down his boyfriend’s body, and he hated this. He hated himself for putting them in this position and before he could stop himself, he leaned down and kissed Mike’s side. And then over to his spine. The impulse to crawl on top of Mike and push everything forward was full-on powerful. He could already feel his lower parts warming back up, his limp erection twitching as he leaned even further over Mike’s body. 

He rubbed his nose into Mike’s back, and then reality flashed across his mind. _What am I doing? I’m screwing this up even more._ Chester stopped his lips millimeters from Mike’s flushed skin before he sat back, and then he stood up from the bed. “You know, we’ve both had a lot to drink,” he said, sucking in as much air as he could get. “We need to sleep it off and we can talk about it tomorrow, okay?” 

Mike had enjoyed the gentle kisses on his back, and even though his body ached for more, his heart ached for more, he just nodded into the sheets, his eyes screwed shut. “Okay,” he mumbled, his voice already giving over to the alcohol induced sleepiness. He wanted Chester to stay but he wasn’t going to ask for anything else tonight. He couldn’t take any more rejection. 

Chester’s face was long, his lips drooped as he watched the damage he’d created. “Mike, I. . .” but he stopped himself. There was no use saying anything else. His body slumped. Even though he wasn’t completely intoxicated, he’d had enough to feel the effects of the alcohol, and his body wanted to sleep. The excitement was gone. The sexy atmosphere of the night vanished. He went to lay down, to pull Mike into his arms, but he stopped. _I’m weak. I’m the weak one._ Chester looked away from his sleeping partner as he scooted around the bed and made his way down the stairs. 

****

When Chester opened his eyes hours later, the morning sun was blaring through his living room windows. “Noooo,” Chester mumbled as he covered his eyes with his arm. He laid for a moment, cursing the morning, his other hand lazily scratching his side. A minute passed before Chester dropped his arm and his eyes eased open, fighting the sunlight before he sat up. He looked down at himself - his mind trying to calculate why he was on the couch in his butterfly decorated socks and matching underwear. He looked around the space, his memory slowly catching up. _Mike._ He looked up, his eyes squinting as he searched the platform of his bedroom. He thought about yelling for the other man, but decided against that quickly as he rubbed his head. _That’s right. I hope he’s all right._

Chester stood up, his stomach not feeling the best. He scanned the floor and spotted his and Mike’s shirts. He stepped over both of them and headed for the bathroom. First things first. He quickly relieved himself and after splashing water on his face, he couldn’t wait anymore. He headed up the steps to the bedroom. _I really fucked up last night. He’s going to hate me. Or. . .Mike doesn’t hate anyone or anything. He’s just going to be sad. I made him sad._ Chester’s eyes dropped as he stepped into the bedroom, and it took him a minute before he looked up to see Mike. 

His boyfriend was flat on his back, his chest lifting and falling gently as he slept. He was still in his socks and dark purple underwear. Chester felt the corners of his lips tug upward. _He’s so damn cute._ He walked over to the bed and sat down. He reached to shake Mike’s leg. “Hey,” he called, lowly, before he said, “Mike? Hey, wake up.” 

Mike felt the hand on his leg, the gentle shake, but he wasn’t ready to face the day. There was a little army of men with jackhammers residing inside his head, pounding away relentlessly, and waking up meant he had to deal with that. They weren’t bothering him while he was asleep. He mumbled something incoherent and covered his eyes with his arm, frowning as he moved. He also wasn’t ready to face Chester. The memories of last night were a little bit fuzzy, but he clearly remembered the sickening feeling of rejection.

“Mike, it’s morning,” Chester said, keeping his hand on the other man’s leg. “You should get up. No better cure for a hangover than kicking its ass with movement.” He smiled, even though Mike wasn’t looking at him, and the gesture dropped from Chester’s face almost as quickly as it had come. “And, we need to talk about last night,” he added, his eyes falling to the red and black flannel bed coverings. “I’m. . .I’m sorry, about how it went.” He swallowed hard, hoping that his boyfriend would speak up and say something. Nothing was worse than silence. He would rather Mike yell at him, then to lay there and say nothing. But he’d never heard Mike yell before, and Chester was pretty sure there’d be no yelling this morning, either. 

“I don’t want to talk about it,” Mike said quietly, his arm still over his eyes. He had a splitting headache, and sorry didn’t feel like enough at the moment. _What does he want me to say? I don’t have anything to say, I just don’t get him. I wasn’t that drunk. Well, okay, maybe I was, I guess that’s why my head hurts. Maybe that’s why he said no. Maybe that’s the only reason._ “Unless you want to tell me why?” If he could have kicked himself for how tiny and pathetic his voice sounded right then, he would have. “Why did you say no?”

Chester took his hand back. He folded both of them in his lap now. “I had too much to drink and you really had too much,” he said. He waited a moment, hoping maybe that would be enough, but all that came was silence. “I’ve been in situations like that before,” he added, even though he wasn’t sure how much it would help. “People give their permission and then they freak out in the morning. And, besides, this is more than that. It’s your first time, and I didn’t want it to be a botch job because we were tipsy. I didn’t want to have to -” He clamped his mouth shut and rolled his lips together for a second. “I mean, the timing was just bad. I wasn’t saying no because I didn’t want to.” 

Mike finally uncovered his eyes, looking at Chester on the edge of the bed. “I’m not drunk now,” he said, his hand inching toward Chester, “so I want to tell you something.” He took a deep breath and closed his eyes for a minute, wishing he could have a couple of Advil. “I _am_ ready, Ches. I want you to know that. Totally sober, in the light of day, I want you to know that I want it to be you. I want my first time to be with you.” 

With his hand outstretched and his eyes closed, Mike waited for Chester’s response. He hoped he wasn’t wrong about Chester, about the connection he felt and the desire he had to make that connection deeper. He’d dated some guys, but none of them had stirred his soul the way Chester had. Now he needed to know if he’d made that same impact on his boyfriend, or if Chester was going to tell him no again.

Chester looked over, his focus washing over Mike’s face, and a sigh of relief followed. He nodded, and then he realized that didn’t do anyone any good. He ducked his eyes as he took Mike’s hand. “I want you to be sure,” he said, even as he squeezed his fingers around Mike’s, “because it’s not something you can re-do. And, well, honestly, I never thought we’d get this far. And maybe I was a bit freaked last night. I want it to be good. More than good,” he corrected. “I want it to be memorable and not on a list of mistakes. I don’t want to be a mistake.” 

Mike finally sat up, his hand still in Chester’s, wincing as his body adjusted to being vertical. “I hope this doesn’t freak you out more, but… I know this is what I want. You are what I want. I feel safe with you.” He bit his lip, suddenly aware that he was wearing none of the protective layers of clothing that usually covered him when he was feeling emotional. “I don’t know how to explain it, but I feel like we’re both invested in this now. And I trust you. Believe me when I tell you I’m sure. Just… not right now.” He looked at Chester, smiling just a bit. “I have a raging headache and I don’t think now would be any better than last night.” 

“Not now is good,” Chester agreed as he raised Mike’s hand and kissed it. “I’m sure you’re not up for breakfast, but how about coffee?” 

“Coffee, fuck that sounds good,” Mike said. “And some Advil.” 

Chester stood up, his body aching as he yawned. He spotted his and Mike’s jeans tangled together on the floor. He scooped them both up and pulled them apart. “And just so you know, Sexy Boy,” he said with a chuckle, “I totally kicked your ass at undressing faster than you last night.” He chucked Mike’s pants at him before he carefully stepped into his jeans and pulled them up. 

“Whatever.” Mike smiled, the mood of the whole morning lifting as he slung his legs over the side of the bed and pulled his jeans on. “You got me drunk. I could beat you sober any day.”

Chester rolled his eyes. “I got you drunk?” he said, his fingers pressed to his naked chest. “ _You_ got you drunk,” he emphasized before he headed for the stairs. “And now you need to bring your hungover ass on so we can get some coffee.” 

“Don’t forget my Advil,” Mike called after him, running his hands through his tousled blue hair before following in his boyfriend’s footsteps. 

****

TBC


	9. A Close Call

Chester could hear the steaks sizzling as he paced back and forth from one side of his kitchen to the other. He rubbed his forehead, then his chin and neck. Mike would be showing up for dinner any minute. The steaks were just about done, the baked potatoes were split open and steaming on two plates sitting on the bar. Chester had already set out all the toppings - shredded cheese, bacon bits, sour cream, chives, butter, and salt and pepper. He had a line of condiments for the steaks as well. A1 sauce, Heinz 57, Ketchup, and a jar of spicy mustard that he wasn’t even sure where he’d gotten it from. 

The stage was set, now he just had to work up his nerve to tell his boyfriend the truth. _It’s one of Mike’s favorite meals. He’s going to swoon the moment he walks in and smells this. Maybe I should just blurt it out right away. Like a band-aid - just rip it right off._ His shoulders slumped as he took his phone from his pocket. He clicked on his storage of photos and flipped through them - Jason, Mark, Ryan, Rob, and so many others that he worked with. So many candid snapshots of the people he’d come to think of as a family over the last two years, and yet he knew Mike wasn’t going to approve. He knew that telling Mike about his job - about his other life - was going to either be the beginning of their lives really starting together, or it would be the end of what they had. 

_He’s ready. He’s ready to go all the way. . .but I can’t until I tell him. And then he might not even want to touch me again, let alone give me his virginity. God, his virginity. That’s so heavy._ He leaned his head back, staring up at the ceiling, squinting his eyes from the overhead lights. _He was just supposed to be another nobody. Someone who wouldn’t care. Someone I wouldn’t even have to bother telling. . .but he’s. . .Mike. My Sexy Boy who cares so fuckin’ much about everything._

Chester smiled. Despite himself, his worries drifted for a moment as pictures of Mike flooded his mind. He loved the way the younger man kissed. He loved how excited he got over the small things, and how he was open about his life and his feelings. He loved his eyes - deep eyes that always got Chester right in the heart. He was fond of Mike’s blue hair, and the way he was so humble about how talented he really was. . .musically, artistically, and probably in ways that Chester hadn’t even discovered yet. _I’ve even gotten to like his silly flannel shirts. They’re so Mike._

The timer on the stove went off, pulling Chester out of his thoughts. He sucked in the warm air through his nostrils; he could tell just by the smell that his steaks were done. He pulled them off the heat and quickly slipped them on the plates with the baked potatoes. _Done. And he should be here any minute._ Chester washed his hands and double checked his outfit. He’d decided to go with something simple for tonight. Something that would click with Mike’s need to be comfortable rather than fashionably acceptable. He adjusted his belt and his khaki pants, making sure they were straight. He double checked his black and white Converse sneakers - they were clean and their neon green laces matched his glow in the dark lip ring he’d decided he liked very much. He tugged at his bright green t-shirt that had the silhouettes of three aliens on it, and ran a last minute hand over his red-tipped mohawk. That was it. His outfit was on point, the food was ready, now he just needed Mike to show up.

His eyes flipped toward the front door; his backpack and suitcase were sitting nearby. He was leaving in the morning. He’d be gone for a week with Mark and the others to do some on location work, and he already knew he was going to miss Mike something awful. Tonight wasn’t just about a good meal and spending time together. Tonight was about saying goodbye. It was about spending a last night together before they’d be separated for a week - seven long days of texts and phone calls only. Tonight, he knew, Mike would be expecting to officially consummate their relationship, a thought that sent tingles up Chester’s legs and pulled a smile to his lips just as the doorbell rang. 

Chester let out a long breath. _This is it. I’m going to tell him. We’ve come too far and we can’t have sex until I tell him. So I’ll just tell him,_ he convinced himself as he got to the door. _He’ll understand. He’ll have to understand. I’ll explain it to him and it will be fine, just like what happened with the club the other week. I’ll explain and he’ll be okay and we’ll be okay and then he’s all mine. . .naked and mine. Just mine._ Chester grinned, and as his heart and thoughts started to feel lighter, he opened the door. 

Mike’s heart was racing in the moments before he pressed the doorbell. This was it, a night he’d been looking forward to in the long week since he’d told Chester he was ready. Ready to go all the way… he could feel his pulse in his ears when he thought about how it might all go. As he’d gotten ready that afternoon he let his mind drift through the past week, all of the intimacies they had shared that were leading up to this night, this moment. _I don’t know why he’s been holding back all week… I’ve been super clear with him about what I want, that I’m ready… tonight has to be it. I don’t want to wait anymore._ As Chester opened the door and their eyes met, all of the anticipation hit Mike at once, and his smile was wide as he walked inside and reached for his boyfriend.

His hands went immediately around Chester’s waist and Mike pulled their hips together as he leaned in for a hello kiss, smiling as he nuzzled his nose along Chester’s cheek before softly capturing the other man’s lips. It was just a moment, a quick suckle at the lip ring, before Mike pulled back and whispered, “hey.”

“Hey back,” Chester answered, his hand on Mike’s side. “You seem awfully happy. Can’t wait to be rid of me for a week, huh?” he asked sheepishly. 

“You know that’s not true,” Mike said, his eyes going wide before his smile dropped just a little bit. “I don’t want to think about that part yet.” He stopped, the scent of steak hitting his nose. “Mmm, it’s smells amazing in here, Ches.”

Chester stepped back, motioning for his boyfriend to properly step inside. He closed the door behind him. “I made one of your favorites: steak and baked potatoes,” he said as he ushered Mike over to the bar. “I got every topping you could possibly want, and,” he said, wrapping an arm around Mike’s back, “I’ve got a coconut cream pie in the refrigerator for later. I didn’t make it,” he was sure to add, “but I totally want points for buying it.” 

Everything was spread in front of him, and Mike couldn’t help himself from grinning again. “I have no idea how I got so lucky to find you. You remember everything. _And_ you’re an awesome cook, which means all I have to do is eat.” His voice had a silly flip to it but he didn’t care. He was practically giddy over the prospect of the evening ahead. “Thanks for this, it takes the sting out of tomorrow a bit. I can’t believe you have to be gone for an entire week. And to Hawaii, that’s so cool. I wish I could go.”

_Me, too._ Chester cleared his throat as he stepped away to get them silverware. “Me, too,” he said, pulling out forks and knives from a drawer, “but it’s for work. It will be boring. I’ll call you every night though, I mean, if that’s okay?” he asked, his eyes flipping across the way to catch Mike’s reaction. “God, that sounds needy. I mean, we can still talk and text while I’m gone.” 

“I want to,” Mike was quick to say. It wasn’t like Chester to sound clingy and Mike sucked it up greedily. For once he wasn’t the one sounding love sick. “I mean, I won’t be sitting around staring at my phone or anything, I’ve gotta work too. But I don’t think I could go all week without talking to you.” _Especially if this night ends the way I think it’s going to. All I’m going to want to do is talk to him every second. I’m going to miss him so much._

“I know,” Chester said with a nod as he plopped a dab of butter on his potato before adding salt and pepper. “I know you have to work. But yeah, it would feel weird to not at least text with you every day. We talk so much, and, well, I’ll do what I can to escape my co-workers in the evenings. When we’re on trips my boss likes us to do things together. He says it helps to build a team spirit and shit like that.” Chester shrugged his shoulders before he felt over his front pants pocket where his phone was hiding. _Pictures. I’ll show him pictures of everyone. Right now. I just brought them up. It will make sense._ He went to pull his phone out, ready to start the conversation he’d been dreading for weeks, but as he watched Mike happily fixing his plate, his hips swinging a little like he was in such a good mood that he was dancing all on his own, Chester let out a sigh, and took his plate and the bottle of ketchup to the table to sit down instead. 

“I think it’s great that you get along with everyone you work with so well,” Mike said, looking down at his potato. There were toppings all over his plate how, he’d put so much cheese and bacon and chives on his potato that they were falling off. It didn’t matter, everything was better with lots of cheese and bacon. “I don’t really interact with people I work with much. Everyone is in their own space most of the time, what we do is so independent from each other. One day I’d like to have my own studio, be able to have people around that I really enjoy.” Mike carried his plate to the table and sat down across from Chester. “It sounds like you have that at work, you know… from the little bit you’ve told me about it.” He cut into his steak immediately, suddenly starving.

Chester was breathing hard, even though he was trying not to show it. He could feel himself sweating, a little on his palms, the back of his neck. His leg was bouncing like crazy under the table. “Yeah, I like to keep work and my personal life separate. It’s just easier that way. I. . .well,” he paused, his phone already in his hand as he brought it up for Mike to see. “Mike. . .there’s something we need to talk about.” He waited, hoping to grab Mike’s full attention, even though his boyfriend currently had his mouth stuffed so full he looked like he was part chipmunk. 

The serious tone of Chester’s voice caused Mike’s stomach to drop as his mind raced through possibilities. _He made me all this food to break up with me. He’s trying to let me down easy. No, he said he was going to miss me. Maybe he’s going to be gone longer than a week? Maybe he really didn’t get a pie. That’s okay, I don’t need dessert._ He swallowed and looked up at Chester, setting his fork and knife down on the side of the plate. “What is it? Did you forget the pie?”

Chester wasn’t sure what to say. He sat, stunned, at the innocent look on Mike’s face. Though he wasn’t sure why. If there was thing he’d learned about his boyfriend over the last several weeks, it was that he had a good heart, and that food was almost his number one priority in life. Which was good, because Chester liked to cook for him. “No,” he answered, his momentum fading as he set his phone down. “There really is pie, I didn’t lie about that. But. . .” _I can say it. I can do it. He’ll be okay. Plus, he won’t storm out of here with pie waiting on him. Right? Yes. Here we go._ “I need to, well, I need to. . .I wanted to ask if you’d like to stay here while I’m gone?” Chester shut his eyes, the shame of being such a coward crashing over him as he cursed himself. 

Mike was silent for a moment as Chester’s words sunk in. There was in fact pie. And his boyfriend wanted him to stay at his place while he was away. It was almost too good to be true. “Really? Why? Do you have plants or something that I don’t know about that need to be watered?” Mike looked around the apartment for a second and his eyes settled back on Chester. “I mean, I’d love to stay here. It’s closer to work anyway… and…” The corners of Mike’s eyes crinkled a bit as he smiled at his boyfriend. “Maybe I won’t miss you so much if I’m here, with all your things. I promise I’ll take care of your stuff while you’re away.”

Chester nodded, the hand holding his fork shaking a little. “Good. And, no. I don’t have any plants. I just figured maybe you’d, you know, want a break from Anna and you can hang out here and abuse the ocean view and. . .I kind of like the idea of you being here while I’m gone.” He ducked his eyes. He was really letting his sappy side show, which he could only hope would help to soften the blow when he finally got up the nerve to tell Mike the truth. “I’ve got plenty of food in the kitchen,” he said, pointing with his fork. “You can have whatever you want, and you can sleep upstairs, if you want.” 

Chester’s bed was one of Mike’s favorite places. It was soft and comfortable, and it smelled like Chester’s body wash. The idea of being able to snuggle down in the sheets Chester had chosen for him and cuddle his pillow while they were apart made the tragedy of separation seem much more bearable. “I might never get out of bed while I’m staying here,” Mike said, a hint of suggestion in his voice. “Being there will feel like being closer to you.” He winked and picked up his utensils, ready to dive back into the dinner Chester had made. There was no sense in letting everything get cold. They could talk logistics later if they needed to. 

Chester nodded, his shoulders slumping as he started to cut up his steak. He knew it was good. He knew the meat was cooked well, and that every bite he dragged through mounds of ketchup would excite his taste buds, but his appetite was nowhere. He stayed quiet, his thoughts swarming around other ways he could bring the subject up. _I have to tell him before we’re done eating. I know what he’s thinking. As soon as the food is done, he’ll be ready to go upstairs. He’s done nothing but allude to that all week. I want to. I really want to._ He looked up, watching as Mike scooped another bite of his cheesy potato out of its skin. 

Mike was so consumed in the deliciousness of the meal that he didn’t notice their conversation had dwindled to nothing as they ate. His mind was full of thoughts for the week ahead, thinking that he would have tons of room to paint while Chester was away, and a great view as inspiration. He was planning which supplies to grab from his place as he popped the last bite of steak in his mouth and realized he should probably get permission to paint in Chester’s apartment. Swallowing, he glanced over at Chester, who was mostly moving food around on his plate instead of eating. “Hey, you feeling okay?” he asked, feeling concerned as he realized it had been several minutes since Chester had spoken. He’d been too caught up in his own plans and his meal to notice.

Chester looked up from his plate, the look in Mike’s deep eyes catching him. “Yeah,” he answered softly. “Just thinking. Is it good?” he asked, half-heartedly gesturing toward Mike’s almost totally empty plate. 

“Of course it is. You’re amazing,” Mike complimented. “Are you worrying about whether you packed everything? I always think that when I’m going away, worrying over what I may have forgotten. I was actually thinking about that right now, since I’ll be staying here. I’ll have to grab some stuff… tomorrow, after you go. I’m not leaving while you’re still here.” He paused for a minute, thinking about his mental checklist. “I was wondering if it would be okay if I painted here? I’ll put down drop cloths and stuff, and I’ll just do acrylics, that’s not too messy. But I won’t if you don’t want me to.” Mike looked toward the large windows facing the ocean. “I just think I could do some good work in this space.”

“Yeah, painting is fine,” Chester answered, his eyes dropping back to his untouched food. “The light that comes in here is great, but, I guess you already know that. Maybe you’ll paint something for me while I’m gone?” He asked, the clouds in his mind breaking a little as he cracked a half-smile. 

“You’ve got a great wall space over there,” Mike pointed across the room, “that really needs something. Maybe I can provide the perfect thing. You’ll have to wait and see.” With that, he stood up, grabbing his plate. “Are you going to eat that? Or do you want me to take it? You don’t seem like you’re going to finish it,” he said, pointing at Chester’s plate.

“No, I don’t think so. Maybe I’ll eat it later.” Chester picked up his plate to hand over. “You wanna just put it in the fridge for me?” 

“Okay, do you mind if I grab the pie while I’m in there?” Mike could practically taste the creamy topping on his favorite pie, the little bits of toasted coconut sprinkled on the whipped cream, and he hoped Chester wouldn’t mind if he went ahead and had dessert. He was already at the counter, digging in a drawer for something to cover Chester’s plate with before he put it in the refrigerator.

“Of course, you can have the whole thing,” Chester said as he watched Mike carefully wrap foil over his untouched meal before he slid it onto the top shelf of the refrigerator. “I’ve actually never really been a fan of coconut cream pie. I just got that for you, since I know it’s your favorite.” 

Mike’s head poked around the open door of the fridge. “You didn’t have to do that. I want you to have dessert, too,” he said, frowning a bit in Chester’s direction. When his boyfriend didn’t say anything to that, Mike reached into the fridge and brought out the pie. “Is there something else you want me to get you? I feel like such a pig eating this and you don’t have anything.”

Chester shook his head, his stomach hurting a little. “No, I’m fine. And you’re not a pig. I got that for you, I want you to enjoy it.” He flashed Mike a sad smile before he looked down at his phone again. He knew Mike would inhale that pie, and then his time would be up. “I, well, I wanted to talk to you little bit more about something. About work,” he dared to say as he picked his phone up and clicked on his Photos icon. “I figured I could show you some pictures of my co-workers, since I’ll be away with them for the week. You know, so if I mention any of them, you’ll have a face to put with the name.” 

Sinking the knife he’d gotten into the pie, Mike cocked his head a little to the side. “Pictures? Umm, okay?” _That’s weird. I don’t have pictures of my co-workers on my phone. But we’re just music teachers. Chester works in film… maybe he knows famous people. Wow. That would be crazy._ “Let me get this piece out of the pie. First one is always the hardest, you know. And I hate it when the point breaks off. That’s the best part.” 

He had just slid the perfectly pointed piece of pie onto a plate when his phone rang. Mike put the cover back on the pie as he dug his phone out of his back pocket, frowning at the screen as he looked at the caller. “Hang on, Ches, I need to answer this. It’s the parent of one of my kids.” Abandoning his pie, Mike walked around the bar and into the living area to answer the call, dropping his voice a little for some privacy as he moved away from where Chester was sitting. 

_Saved again,_ Chester thought, his head in his hands as he stared down at the table. _As soon as he sits down, I’m doing it. Doing it. Have to do it. Maybe I’ll let him have a few bites of pie first. Yeah. That’s better. And coffee._ His head picked up as he stared into the kitchen. _He can’t really enjoy that pie without coffee, and lord knows I need something in my hands while I do this. Something other than my phone. . .not sure he’s going to like those pictures. Gotta be careful which ones I show him._

Chester stood up. He glanced over his shoulder to see Mike pacing back and forth in front of the couch, and right away he could tell that whatever was being said wasn’t good. He headed into the kitchen, getting down two coffee mugs, his eyes constantly flipping up to keep an eye on his boyfriend’s troubled expression and quickening steps. 

All of the happy pie thoughts were gone as Mike made his way back into the kitchen, stopping at the bar with his hands shaking. “Ches, I… oh, my God, one of my kids is in the hospital. He… he almost died, his mom called to tell me he’s not going to be at his lesson tomorrow, but he almost [i]died[/i].” Mike dropped his phone on the bar and put his head in his hands, feeling sick. “It’s Drew. I told you about Drew.” 

Chester’s eyes were wide as he sorted through Mike’s statement before he rushed over and pulled his boyfriend into his arms. “Oh, Mike, I’m sorry,” he said, holding him close. “He’s okay, right? What happened?” 

The comfort of his boyfriend’s touch was welcome, and Mike dropped his hands from his eyes to squeeze him in a tight hug. “They don’t know if it was an accident or if… if… he was trying to kill himself. He overdosed. Chester,” Mike struggled as he tried not to completely break down. “I want to go see him, in the hospital… I don’t think I can drive. Not right now. Can you take me to see him? I know that probably sounds weird, but… we’re close, he’s like a younger brother to me. I want to go tell him I care.” He took a deep breath, pushing down the feeling of just wanting to cry. “I don’t want to go alone.”

Chester shut his eyes before he kissed Mike on the head. “Of course. I’m sorry, Mike. I hope. . .I hope it was just an accident. We can go right now, if you want. Let me grab my wallet, it’s upstairs.” He kissed Mike again, his lips leaving a quick wet spot on his boyfriend’s cheek before he headed across the loft and up the stairs. _Dammit. So tonight is not the night to tell him after all. I can’t tell him, not after this. Gosh, I hope that kid’s okay. Mike will be crushed if he’s not. And he’s young, it seems like Mike said he was only thirteen or something._ He snatched his wallet from the dresser top and headed back down the steps. “Okay,” he announced, “as soon as you’re ready.” 

He’d just put away the pie, and Mike turned away from the refrigerator, running the back of his hand quickly over both eyes and hoping his boyfriend hadn’t noticed him crying. It was just a shock. He never thought things were so bad that Drew would try to… Mike shook his head. He couldn’t even think it right now. _I should have said something to his mom. I should have told her how much Drew was struggling with things with his dad. But I know she’s struggling too, it probably wouldn’t have helped. I wish there was something I could do. It’s not fair._

He stepped toward Chester, exhaling a breath he hadn’t be aware he was holding. “I’m ready, I guess. I want to get there before it gets too late and they won’t let me see him.” He grabbed his phone from where he’d left it on the bar, heading for the door with Chester following behind him.

****

There was zero conversation on the rushed trip across town to get to the hospital where Drew was. Mike had spent the time looking out the window and sniffing, and Chester could tell he was holding back tears. And that was okay. Chester wasn’t going to push Mike to say anything, this was his time now. However Mike needed to deal with things, Chester was ready to be supportive. 

The nurse at the emergency room desk had sent them down a maze of hallways, and they were finally in sight of the room number she had told them. Chester rubbed his arms. “I hate hospitals,” he said, trying not to imagine what was behind each closed door as they passed them. “They’re always freezing and there’s sick people everywhere. Hurt people. Especially in the emergency room.” 

Absently, Mike nodded in Chester’s direction. Nobody cared for hospitals, all hospitals were was a place for illness and sadness. He didn’t know exactly what he’d see when he went into Drew’s room. What did someone look like after they’d had their stomach pumped? A child, especially? 

Mike stopped right outside the door to the room, his hands curled into tight fists. “Ches, can you come inside with me? I mean, I know you don’t know him, but… I don’t know what to expect, and I…” he looked at Chester, feeling a little lost. “I know I’d feel better if you were there, too. Please.” It was more about emotional support than anything else right then. Mike knew once he was in the room he’d know what to say, and how to handle himself, as long as Drew’s dad wasn’t there. He didn’t know if he’d be able to control the rage he felt at that man for all the nonsense he put his student through. Having Chester there as back up would keep him from doing or saying something stupid.

Chester’s eyes softened as he ran his fingers down Mike’s arm, and took his hand. “Whatever you need,” he whispered. “I’m here.” 

Mike didn’t let go of Chester’s hand as he knocked on the door to the room and waited. In a few moments the door cracked open and the pretty, young face of Drew’s mom peered out into the hallway. 

“Mike? You didn’t have to come all this way,” she said softly, the door widening to allow her to step out. Vanessa couldn’t be thirty yet, in Mike’s estimation, and it made the whole situation even worse to him. Drew’s father was older, and an asshole in Mike’s opinion, and he was relieved at the moment to not see him.

“I wanted to come see him, and make sure you guys are okay.” Mike clutched at Chester’s hand as he went on, “is Mr. Perez here?” He really hoped not to have to deal with Drew’s dad.

“No, he’s not gotten here yet. He was, um, occupied when I called him to let him know we were here,” Vanessa answered, her eyes skipping past Mike and down the hallway.

Mike felt the rage boiling up inside him, but it wasn’t his place to criticize her husband right now. _Occupied? His child almost dies and he’s occupied? Probably off with his fucking girlfriend._ He took a deep breath and calmed himself down before he asked, “how’s Drew doing?”

“He’s been asleep for a little while… we were here for a long time before I thought to call you about tomorrow. Drew loves you so much, I knew you’d worry if he wasn’t at lessons tomorrow.” Mrs. Perez looked back up at Mike and smiled faintly. “You’re such a good role model for him, Mike. Would you like to come inside and see him?” Almost as an afterthought she looked at Chester and said, “you’re welcome too, I assume you’re a friend of Mike’s?” 

With a smile, Mike turned and looked at Chester. “Yeah, Mrs. Perez, this is my boyfriend, Chester.” He released their hands so Chester could reach out and shake hers. 

“It’s nice to meet you,” he said. “I’m sorry to hear about all this. Mike says wonderful things about your son, Mrs. Perez.” He could feel the tremble in her hand before he let her go. He took a hard swallow, not knowing exactly what else to say as he waited for her to make the next move and let them into the room. 

“Vanessa,” she said, immediately feeling good about Mike’s boyfriend. “Thanks for coming. Let’s see if he’ll wake up for a minute.” She turned and quietly opened the door, holding it for Mike and Chester to walk inside after her. 

Mike waited by the door with Chester at his side and watched the young mother walk to her son’s bedside, brushing his dark hair back from his forehead as she looked down at him. “Drew?” she called softly, petting her hand over his hair. “Honey, someone is here to see you. Do you want to see who it is?” 

Drew’s eyebrows furrowed together, his eyes still closed, and he turned his head to the side under his mother’s touch. Vanessa turned and waved Mike over to the bed, and he stepped closer, leaving Chester at the door. The boy looked so small in the hospital bed, all manner of tubes and wires monitoring his heart rate and oxygen coming from his body. Mike swallowed hard. It was difficult to see someone so young in the hospital, especially someone he cared about so much. “Hey, Drew, it’s Mike,” he said calmly, reaching out for the boy’s hand, carefully avoiding the I.V. in the back of his hand. “You don’t have to wake up if you don’t want to. I just wanted you to know I was here.”

Chester stood by the door, shoving his hands in his front pockets as he watched. Mike looked so tender, so gentle as he leaned over the hospital bed of his student. _He would make a great dad to someone. Some lucky kid._ He let out a long breath as he looked around. The other bed in the room was empty, and the television mounted on the wall was on, but the sound was off. He could smell bleach and that sterile smell that lingered in every hospital. He looked back over where Drew was lying, the boy practically motionless, and again Chester had to hope that this hadn’t been an attempt on his life. How tragic that would be. _He looks younger than I pictured. So young to lose hope._

Mike watched Drew’s eye flutter for a second before he managed to crack them open a bit to see Mike at his side. Just for a second, then his eyes slid closed as though the effort to hold them open was more energy than he had. He opened his mouth, but he didn’t say anything. 

“Do you need some water, honey?” his mom asked, picking up a small styrofoam cup with a straw in it from the table. “Here,” she said, putting the straw at this lips before she looked at Mike. “He’s dehydrated, which is to be expected, they told me. He probably won’t say anything.” She turned her attention back to Drew, who had taken a few sips of water before he turned his head away. 

“It’s okay,” Mike said. He didn’t really know what to say, or if saying anything was really necessary. All of the thoughts lingering in his head about whether this had been an accident or not, he couldn’t ask those questions right now. He stroked his thumb over Drew’s fingers and said, “it’s going to be okay, buddy. You’re going to be fine and we’ll get back to piano whenever you’re ready. You’re my best student, you know. I can’t play duets with just everyone. They’re always making me have to improv when they make mistakes, but not you. You’ve got so much talent.” 

It was hard to watch his favorite student, who was always a chatterbox in lessons, say nothing, but Mike knew he was listening. He looked over at Drew’s mom, and said, “how long will you guys be here?”

She sighed and looked down at her son. “At least overnight. Until he can talk to someone and tell them that this was all just an accident. That he didn’t mean for it to happen.” 

Just then Mike felt Drew squeeze his hand lightly, and he looked over to see Drew trying to talk again. “It’s okay, Drew, you don’t have to talk,” Mike immediately reassured, but the boy seemed determined.

“He hasn’t really wanted to talk to me,” Vanessa said in surprise. “Drew? Do you want to talk to Mike alone?” When he nodded just enough to been seen, she stepped back from the side of the bed. “Okay, I’ll go right outside. I’ll be right there if you need me, Drew.” 

Mike nodded at her reassuringly and looked at Chester, who looked uncomfortable by the door. “It’s okay, Ches, I’m good for just a minute. I’ll be out in a minute.” He turned his attention back to Drew as Chester followed Vanessa out into the hallway.

Chester watched as Mrs. Perez stood by the closed door, her hand over her mouth. “Do you, do you want me to go get you anything?” Chester offered, since that seemed like the right thing to do. Distraught people needed stuff. Food. Coffee. Cigarettes. A stiff drink. “I can go find you something to eat or drink,” he clarified. 

She shook her head, taking a few deep breaths in through her nose before her hand dropped away and she looked down the hallway again, her eyes glassy. “I’ll be fine. I hope he talks to Mike. He won’t say anything to me. And I’m afraid of what that means.” Vanessa closed her eyes for a minute and shook her head. “If anyone can get the truth about what happened, it will be Mike. Drew looks up to him so much. Sometimes I wish… I wish…” she paused for another deep breath, letting it out slowly. “I wish he got to spend more than an hour a week with Mike. It’s good for him to be around such a positive man. So different from what he gets from his dad.” 

Chester nodded. “Yeah, Mike’s the most positive person I’ve ever met. He cares so much. Especially about his,” he paused for a moment as he gestured toward the door, “his students. He calls them all his kids.” 

“That’s so sweet,” Vanessa said, looking back toward the room, the closed door between her and her son. “I hope he tells Mike this was just an accident. I don’t know if I can deal with this any other way.”

They lapsed into silence, waiting for Mike to open the door and invite them back in. It had only been a few minutes, maybe five, but it felt like forever in the hallway with nothing else to say to each other. Just as Chester was about to excuse himself to find a restroom, a tall, well-built man appeared from seemingly nowhere, striding down the hallway with arrogance. Without an introduction, Chester just knew this guy was Drew’s dad. He looked like the very brief description Mike had given him one day while he’d been talking about an impressive piece of music Drew had accomplished that week.

Without so much as a glance at Chester, the man started in on Drew’s mom. “What are you doing out here in the hallway? Did you just leave him alone in there?” He gestured toward the door, making a move toward it.

“He asked me to step out. His piano teacher is here to see him, he wanted to talk to him alone.” Vanessa put her hand out to stop her husband. “Don’t go in, Mike said he’d come get us when they were finished.”

“Us?” Drew’s dad looked around the hallway and his eyes stopped on Chester. “Who are you?” he barked in Chester’s direction.

Chester’s fists balled at his sides. This wasn’t his first run-in with an asshole. But this was the father of one of Mike’s students, and so Chester tamed his tongue, and answered in his most polite voice, “Hi, I’m Chester. I’m Mike’s boyfriend. I came along for support.” He didn’t reach to shake hands, he knew that wouldn’t end well. 

With a dismissive scowl, Drew’s dad turned back to Vanessa. “I’m going in there. I’m going to see my son.”

“You’re not going in,” Vanessa answered, stepping in front of the door. “Drew asked for some privacy, he’s old enough for us to respect that.” Her voice wavered a little as she asserted herself, clearly nervous about the reaction she was going to get from her husband.

In a flash, the father had his hand wrapped around Vanessa’s upper arm, grabbing her and pushing her to the side. “I said I’m going inside. He’s thirteen. He gets no privacy.”

Instinct kicked in the moment Chester saw him grab Drew’s mom. He jumped forward, and lightly grabbed the dad by the arm. “Hey, let’s just all calm down,” he suggested, as he let go, hoping that his action would be mimicked. “Everything’s okay. He asked to talk to Mike, and they’ll be done in just a minute.” He took a half a step back as he watched Drew’s dad turn his glare away from his wife and whirl it his way. 

“You stay out of this. There’s nothing for Drew to talk to Mike about. I don’t understand why he’s always going on about him anyway. He’s just a piano teacher. If wants to talk he can talk to me.”

Just before Chester could make a rebuttal defending Mike, the door to the hospital room opened, and Mike came out, his eyes a little red. His gaze landed on the scene in front of him, Chester’s defensive stance, and Drew’s dad holding his mom’s arm aggressively. “Oh. I didn’t know you were here, Mr. Perez,” he said, a bit of an edge to his usually polite tone.

Chester exhaled as he watched his boyfriend speak. He took a few steps back, willing his nerves to calm down and he listened to Mike’s lowered voice, only being able to pick up a word here and there. He was sure Mike would fill him in on everything later, but right now it was not his place to be involved. He stretched his neck from side to side, and ran a hand over his red-tipped mohawk as he stared down the hallway, watching the nurses go in and out of rooms to attend to their patients. 

“Ches, let’s go,” Mike said tightly as he pulled his boyfriend’s attention back to him. Without even waiting to make sure Chester was following, Mike took off down the hallway, anxious to leave the hospital behind him.

****

Chester unlocked the door to the loft, holding the door for his boyfriend, as he slumped by him, his face and spirits low. “There’s still pie,” Chester offered on reflex as he shut and locked the door. “Or I can make us some coffee. Or. . .I don’t know, Mike, you tell me what you need,” he said as he followed behind his boyfriend. Truth was, Chester was a little lost when it came to such emotionally personal matters. Mike was first boyfriend in a long time, and his first real boyfriend since he’d turned eighteen - since he’d been an adult - and he was very out of practice. Offering stuff was all he knew to do. 

Mike ran his hand over his hair, feeling the blue spikes he’d taken such care with earlier in anticipation of their evening together. There was no way he was in the mood for anything other than pie and bed now. It had been an exhausting evening. “I need a minute. Can I get a shower? And maybe you could make me that coffee while I’m in there?” He glanced at Chester, hoping he wouldn’t be disappointed. He felt like he could fall asleep on his feet all of a sudden.

Chester nodded. “Absolutely.” He scooted forward and took Mike gently by the arm, kissing his cheek. “I’ll run up and get you some clothes. I swear I’ll pick you out something comfortable,” he promised with a partial smile. 

“Just lay them on the counter. I’m getting in the shower right now,” Mike said, pulling free from Chester and starting toward the bathroom. “I’ll be quick.” He stared at the floor on the way to the bathroom, his heart heavy with the events of the evening. Pie and coffee, that would be comforting while he told Chester about what Drew shared with him.

Chester sprinted up the stairs, his mind racing. _Comfortable. Gotta find comfortable._ He flung his closet doors open, his eyes blitzing over everything he owned. He briefly debated a white t-shirt that had blue around the collar and short sleeves, but then he caught sight of the older, faded shirt that Mike had said he liked so much. He snatched it from the hanger, and spun around toward the dresser. He quickly found Mike’s pajama pants of choice and without too much thought he opened the next drawer and picked out a pair of underwear to match the shirt - dark and unflashy. 

He was back downstairs in no time. He could still hear the water running, so he didn’t bother to knock on the bathroom door. He slid it open, and quickly deposisted the clothes on the counter, just like he’d been asked to. He stole a glance toward the steamy shower and smiled before he left, leaving Mike to take care of himself. 

_Now for coffee. I know I could use some. What a night. Not at all like we planned. . .which, maybe it’s better this way. I hope Mike will be okay. I’ve never seen him so down._ He moved around the kitchen, quickly setting things up and by the time the coffee pot was alerting the world that it was ready, Mike stepped out of the bathroom. 

The hot shower had been exactly what Mike needed, and he was so tired he hadn’t even questioned the inclusion of underwear in the clothes Chester brought him. If they weren’t close enough for that now, Mike probably shouldn’t be entertaining the thought of having sex with him either. He smiled for a moment at how silly that sounded in his head before he smelled the coffee, and he made his way into the kitchen, pulling on the end of the t-shirt. He was snuggled head to toe in Chester’s clothes, and now all he wanted was the comfort of Chester’s arms. But first, pie. Pie first, and then he’d go get in Chester’s big bed and fall asleep with Chester’s arms around him.

“I’m so ready for this pie,” he said, watching Chester pour coffee into two mugs on the counter. 

“It’s all for you, Sexy Boy,” Chester said, flipping him a smile. “You can just take the whole thing with a fork, if you want.” He held back the laugh that wanted to follow, not sure if Mike was up for teasing yet. 

“Nah, just a piece will do it,” Mike replied with another bit of a smile. “If you hand me the whole pie I’ll eat the whole pie. Then you’ll be up with me all night while I’m sick.” Suddenly it occurred to him that Chester probably needed to go to bed, he’d mentioned an early flight the next morning. “And you don’t need that, you’ve got a flight in the morning. Damn, I’m sorry. I forgot all about it.” He looked sadly at his boyfriend, thinking about how much it sucked that he was leaving in the morning. Nothing about this evening had gone the way he’d planned.

“I do. Gotta be up at five, which really is torture. It’s why I’m only having half a cup of this delicious nectar,” he said, raising his coffee cup. He headed toward the couch, knowing Mike was following him. He sat down, his whole body letting out a groan as he sat back. He shut his eyes for a moment, the night already feeling like a blur. He turned his head, letting his eyes slide back open to watch as Mike sat down. His blue hair was still a little damp, and very flat from his shower, and Chester felt something peaceful settle over himself as he watched Mike eat his pie. “Is it good?” Chester asked, even though he had no desire to try any. 

It was the best pie Mike had ever had, probably due to the events of the day, not to mention the fact that Chester had gotten it selflessly for him to enjoy. “Yeah, it’s so good. I can’t believe you don’t like coconut cream pie. That could have been a deal breaker if I’d known it two months ago,” Mike teased lightly, taking another bite of the creamy goodness. He finished off the pie and set his plate on the coffee table, picking up his mug in its place. The coffee had cooled just slightly to the temperature Mike preferred it, and he took a few sips before he signed and looked over at Chester. He looked tired, and Mike didn’t want to burden him with a lot of detail from the hospital.

“You look like you could use a hot shower, too, Ches,” he murmured, closing his eyes for a minute. “Sorry I dragged you out there tonight, but I’m so glad you were there. Sorry you had to deal with Drew’s dad too… that man is something else,” he finished, scowling at the thought as he fixed his eyes back on Chester. 

“Yeah, got that vibe from him,” Chester said before he yawned. “And I definitely need a shower. I’ll never manage one in the morning.” He sat forward, leaving his coffee mug on the table as he stood up. “You going to be okay? I’ll just be a few minutes.” He paused, scrubbing his fingers through his hair. “Of course you know that’s a lie. I’ll be at least twenty minutes.” 

Mike nodded, feeling the exhaustion in his bones. “I’ll just go up and lay down, if that’s okay? I don’t really want to talk about everything tonight. It’s just too much…” He sat his mug down and looked over at the stairs. “He told me it wasn’t an accident, Chester. And I don’t know what to do. I need some time to think about it, I guess. By the time I figure it out I’m sure his parents will already know, I told him to tell the psychologist that comes by in the morning, even though it would be scary, and they’d probably keep him there a few extra days… I think I did the right thing. Right?”

Chester reached his hand out, cupping Mike’s shoulder. Suicide. It was a subject that hit close to home for Chester, but saying anything now seemed like it would be too much. Too much for the both of them. “Yeah,” he answered, “you did the right thing. But if he doesn’t tell the doctor, you need to say something to someone.” 

“I know. And I will. I’m just hoping he does it on his own, you know? I told him he was strong enough to ask for help, tried to encourage him… and that I was there if he needed to talk. But I can’t give him my number, that’s not cool with him being thirteen and all… so I just have to hope his mom keeps me in the loop. Maybe I’ll call her in a few days and check on him.” Mike stood up and put out his hand for Chester to take. “Come on, enough of this. You go get your shower, I’ll try to wait up, but I can’t promise anything. Your bed is too comfy.” 

Chester led the way up the stairs, Mike’s hand in his until they reached the bedroom. He watched out of the corner of his eye as Mike pulled the blankets back and slid in under the sheets. “I swear I’ll be, like, ten minutes top. I can be fast,” Chester said, as Mike’s eyes were already closed. He didn’t waste any time. He quickly grabbed some clothes, and headed back downstairs. He jumped in the shower, scrubbing over his back, neck, stomach and legs faster than he ever had in his life. The water was hot and as it soaked into his body while he rushed through his routine, the idea of going upstairs and laying down with Mike to pass out was a happy one. 

When every inch of him was clean, Chester turned the water off, toweled himself down and pulled on his clothes. He was back upstairs, and he had a triumphant grin on his face as he stepped into the bedroom. “Ha, twelve minutes, that’s a record for me,” he said cheerily, but then he stopped, his hand going over his mouth as he stood in the doorway. 

Mike was facing his way, his head on the pillow, his eyes closed, but his lips were barely spread open as he breathed slowly. Steadily. Chester moved around the room, turning off the light and closing the closet doors he’d failed to get all the way shut the first time around. He let himself yawn as he stretched and lazily moved to the bed. He pulled his shirt off. Normally he slept naked, but when Mike slept over, he’d kept it to just going shirtless. He tossed the t-shirt onto the nightstand before he pulled his phone from his pajama bottoms’ pocket. He clicked through the commands to set an alarm for five the next morning. He inwardly groaned at the thought before he set it on the nightstand next to his shirt. He climbed into bed, scooting himself up against Mike’s backside. He let his arm drape over his boyfriend’s waist as he closed his eyes. Mike’s body was warm, and the body heat touched something in Chester’s mind. _We’re going to be okay. After all this...surely, we’ll have to be okay._


	10. Worlds Apart

At five a.m., chimes started to scream from the nightstand. Chester’s eyes opened, the haze of early morning still hovering over his bedroom as he twisted around and slapped for his phone. He managed to find it and with one eye closed, he turned the alarm off. He dropped the device to the bed before he rolled back over and spooned himself up against Mike for a moment, sucking in his warmth, and the peachy smell that was trapped in his blue hair. _Too early. So warm. Just another minute._ His mind kept track, as other thoughts started to drift through...how long it was going to take to get to the airport. Checking in and meeting up with his co-workers, since they were all flying together. The long week ahead, a week without actually seeing Mike. They would have to live off of phone calls and texts. And it was at that thought that he opened his eyes. 

Mike hadn’t moved, and from what Chester could tell, he was still fast asleep. _I’ve never been so hung up on someone. A week. I can do a week, right? It won’t be hard. I’m being a fuckin’ drama queen over here._ He leaned his head down and kissed Mike on his shoulder before he rolled away and onto his back, squinting up at the ceiling as he yawned and tried to will himself to get up and get going. 

The kiss on his shoulder registered somewhere in Mike’s mind, and he roused a bit from his sleep, just enough to reach behind him until his hand met Chester’s warm skin. “Ches?” he mumbled sleepily, his eyes still closed. “It’s already time?”

Chester took Mike’s wandering hand and kissed it. “‘Fraid so, Sexy Boy. Doesn’t feel like it should be this early. If only all the clocks were broken.” He smiled at the thought, keeping Mike’s hand in his, stroking the other man’s fingers lightly. 

Mike stuffed his face in the pillow for a moment as sadness washed over him. He didn’t want Chester to go. It was ridiculous, really. It was just a week. 

Sighing, he turned over so that he was facing his boyfriend and reached for him again, snuggling his face close to Chester’s neck. “Just don’t go. Call in sick and stay with me all week. They’ll be fine without you.” 

Chester shut his eyes, savoring Mike’s warm breath on his neck. “I wish I could, but my boss would flip. It’s not worth the shit storm that would bring. You don’t have to get up. Just go back to sleep,” he said, twisting his head to meet the top of Mike’s hair. He kissed him softly before he went to sit up. If he didn’t just do it, it was never going to happen, and time was ticking away. 

Mike mumbled something under his breath that Chester couldn’t quite hear before he let go, cracking his eyes open and sticking his bottom lip out in a fierce pout. He could probably go back to sleep. In fact, he knew that he would, it just wouldn’t be the same without the other man’s warmth next to him, even if the bed was super warm and snuggly. It would feel empty without Chester. Even without lights, Mike could make out Chester’s shape as he rose from the bed, and he closed his eyes again, not really wanting to watch him go. 

Chester pulled his shirt on and made sure he had his cell phone. Everything else was downstairs. His clothes for the day, his plane ticket, his suitcase and everything he was going to take with him. He looked around the shadowed room, trying to make sure he didn’t need anything else, but there was nothing. Just Mike, still in the bed. 

Chester leaned forward, his hands pressed to the mattress. “Hey, Mike,” he whispered, not being sure if his boyfriend had already fallen back to sleep or not. 

“Hmm?” Mike refused to open his eyes.

“I gotta go,” Chester said, leaning down a little further so he could see Mike’s face. “I’ll call you after we get there.” He paused for a moment, a tangle of words fumbling over his tongue before he pushed forward instead, and kissed his boyfriend gently on the lips. “I’ll miss you.” 

He felt Chester turn away from the bed and Mike’s eyes popped open, his misgivings at seeing him leave forgotten. “Hey, Ches?” Mike reached his hand out, hoping Chester would turn back for a second. 

It was instinct at this point. The sound of Mike’s voice pulled Chester around like he was on a leash. “Yeah?” 

Mike could barely see him in the shadows, but it was enough for his heart to stick in his throat. “I… I…” He stopped, and took a deep breath before he lost his nerve, and he finished, “I’ll miss you, too.” Reaching behind him, Mike pulled Chester’s pillow in front of his body, dropped his face into the scent of the beach and peaches and screwed his eyes shut, falling back to sleep as the sound of Chester’s footsteps faded down the steps.

****

When Mike woke up later that morning, the sunlight coming faintly into the loft from the windows downstairs, he already had a list in his head of things he needed to do. He’d somehow decided in his sleep that the busier he tried to stay the less he would miss Chester, and the best way to tackle the loneliness was to get up and get on with his day until he called.

He made the bed, pulling the red and black blanket up neatly and fluffing the pillows before he grabbed his phone and went downstairs. His clothes from the night before were folded and on the counter in the bathroom, and he couldn’t go to his place in Chester’s pajamas, so he changed quickly, wrinkling his nose in distaste. First on the list was heading to his apartment and packing a bag, and grabbing his art supplies.

He glanced at the wall in the living area that he wanted to paint something for as he opened a drawer in the kitchen for Chester’s spare key. As he added it to his keychain, his heart dancing with happiness at what that implied, he sized up the space in his mind. He knew he didn’t have anything that big and he’d have to stop off at the store and buy a canvas the correct size on the way back from lessons. 

Despite Chester leaving that morning, and the heavy events of the night before, Mike’s mood couldn’t stay down long, it just wasn’t his nature. Before he was halfway home he found himself humming along to the radio, a smile on his face. Chester had asked him to stay at his place all week while he was away. He couldn’t wait to get Anna’s take on that turn of events.

She was already awake and dressed when Mike opened the door to their apartment, which was starting to feel smaller and smaller to Mike though he’d never been bothered by it much before he met Chester. He’d spent so much time at the loft now that he could see why Chester felt claustrophobic in the space, and why they rarely hung out there.

“Hey, Anna,” Mike greeted her as he closed the door behind him. 

Anna had her tea cup in her hand and a women’s magazine in her lap as she looked up. “Hey, roomy. Did Chester leave okay?” She waited for him to answer, looking him up and down. She wasn’t sure why, but something seemed different about him this morning. It wasn’t the first time he’d spent the night over at Chester’s, so that wasn’t it, and then she remembered. “Oh, last night was the night, wasn’t it?” she asked, sitting forward in her chair and brushing her hair out of her face. “Well? I mean, not that you have to tell me...but, you know, tell me.” She grinned up at Mike, ready to hear all about his first time - his first time ever, but more importantly, his first time with Chester Bennington. 

The eagerness on Anna’s face was priceless, and Mike hated to let her down. “Well, it didn’t exactly go the way I planned,” Mike said, watching as Anna’s smile fell into something that looked like concern. “I mean, nothing bad happened between us. We just never got there. I got a call, you know Drew? That kid I teach I’m always telling you about? The really good one with the crazy dad?”

Anna nodded in acknowledgement. She’d heard her fair share of Drew stories...but this most certainly wasn’t adding up to the night she’d been expecting to hear about. “What happened?” she asked, not liking the glum look that had overtaken Mike’s face. 

“He’s in the hospital. He… well, he tried to kill himself yesterday. Overdosed on some of his mom’s pills. She called me right after Chester had made me the best dinner, and things were going great, until then.” He looked around the room for a second, his eyes resting on Anna’s teacup. “We ended up going to the hospital to see him. And by the time we got back, the mood was just gone, we ended up falling asleep pretty soon after we got back.” Mike’s sad expression stayed for a moment longer before he brightened back up again. “ _But,_ Chester did ask me to stay over at his place for the week. You know, to keep an eye on things. So… that’s good, right?” He tossed Anna a smile before he went into their small kitchen in search of coffee.

“He asked you to stay there?” Anna asked, as she turned in her seat. “And… is Drew okay? Mike, are you okay?” She stood up, tossing her magazine onto the coffee table. “I know how close you are with him.” She watched as Mike moved around their open kitchen. She crossed her arms, rubbing her elbows as she waited for him to say something. 

Mike measured out coffee grounds as he answered her. “Yeah, I’m okay. And Drew’s going to be okay. I’m just disappointed with everything... Drew’s dad, and then him feeling like the only choice he had was to exit out. He’s only thirteen, you know? He hasn’t even started his life yet, and he thinks he’s that miserable?” Mike shook his head, flipping the switch on the coffee maker and listening to the water start to heat up. “I mean, you know my parents suck, but never, not once, did I think that was the answer. It just ruined my whole evening. And I’m not saying that from a selfish standpoint, I’m saying that I don’t know how to help. And I hate that.”

Anna had her hand over her mouth, but now she dropped it away. “I’m sorry, Mike,” she said, concern dripping from her. “It’s hard to know what to do, since you’re not family and he’s underage. And I don’t think you’re selfish. I know you better than that.” She watched as Mike fixed his cup of coffee and came back into the cramped living room. He stepped over some of her books before he finally sat down, and Anna did the same. “Do you feel better this morning? After having slept on it all night?” 

“I guess so,” he responded before he blew over the top of his coffee mug. He could never drink it right after it was made. “I’m worried, of course, but I don’t want to intrude. I’ll call his mom in a few days and see how things are going. And, then, there’s Chester.” Mike looked down into his cup, feeling the disappointment over how things had gone last night again. “I really thought last night was _it_ , you know? And now he’s going to be gone all week.” He looked back up at Anna while he waited for his coffee to cool.

“Well, it’s only a week. And you said he’s gone for work, right? It’s not like it’s personal. The time will fly by, you’ll see. Especially if you’re staying in his fancy place all weekend. And when he gets back, well, that will make it even better. You know?” she asked as she offered him a sympathetic smile. “After being away from each other all week, it will make that first time that much more special. So, who knows,” she said with a shrug. “Maybe this is one of those blessings in disguise you always hear about.” 

Mike sat back, crossing one ankle over his knee, and took a tentative sip of his coffee. “Maybe,” he agreed, though a week sounded like forever. “I hope it goes fast.” He’d finish this cup and pack up his things, and head out to teach for a few hours before he went back to Chester’s place. “Thanks, Anna, it’s good just to talk it out a bit.”

“You know we can always talk. And I have to say, Mike, I think you’ve got yourself someone really special. It’s not every guy that would go to the hospital with you instead of having a night of romping sex.” 

****

Chester flopped down on the hotel bed, the mattress stiff and uncomfortable. He had his eyes shut as he listened to his co-worker, Ryan, move around the room. They were all supposed to go to dinner in just a few minutes, but Chester wanted to call Mike. And for that, he wanted some privacy. He lifted his head, peering at Ryan’s tall, slender frame as he unpacked his clothes into one of the dressers. “Would it be terrible for me to skip dinner with everyone?” 

Ryan glanced over to the bed, his dark eyes and hair giving him a ghoulish look. “Like you’re not starving after that flight.” 

“Well, yeah,” Chester had to admit as he rubbed his stomach. “Think you could just bring me back something?”

“Come on, Chester, we’re in Hawaii!” Ryan cheered as he walked over and smacked Chester on his leg. “Island food and all that shit. Pineapples and coconuts or whatever it is they have here.” 

“Coconuts,” Chester mumbled, the image of Mike and his coconut smelling shampoo and the pie from last night invading everything. “Fish, Ry,” he said as he sat up. “That’s what they have here. Seafood. Shrimp.” He snapped his fingers. “That’s what _you_ can bring me back,” he said, poking Ryan on his stomach as the other man stood close to him. “Shrimp and whatever comes with them...fries. With lots of ketchup.”

Ryan nodded. “Or you could get your little ass up and go with us. You know Mark. He’ll drag you out himself if you don’t show.” 

Chester opened his mouth to object, but stopped. Ryan was right. They were given strict orders to meet downstairs to get a good meal together. Before anything else could be said, there was a knock at the door, and Ryan went to see who it was. “Oh, hey, Jason,” he said with a smile, his eyes ghosting up and down the man he knew so well. He started with Jason’s black hair that was so straight it sometimes didn’t look real as it fell just to the top of his ears. His partial Asian characteristics never failed to excite Ryan. He liked the way he held his posture and the curve of his chin and eyes. He was a little short, but Ryan liked that. Jason might be in one of the bosses’ seats, but at least Ryan had some size advantage - an advantage he’d never use to hurt the other man, but it was nice to know he had it. He leaned forward a little, glancing around the hallway, but he didn’t see Mark anywhere. “We’re on our way,” he said in a whisper with a sly smile, keeping himself from tapping the front of Jason’s yellow dress shirt before he corrected his stance and added, “Just waiting on Miss Fussy Pants over there.” He nodded his head back towards the double beds. 

The message in Ryan’s eyes was loud and clear, but Jason ignored him, calling into the bedroom instead, “get your ass up, Bennington, it’s time for dinner.”

Chester rolled his eyes. “Fine,” he grumbled. “I gotta hit the head first,” he said as he stood up and headed for the bathroom. “I’ll meet you guys down there in a few.” He didn’t wait for permission, but shot into the bathroom and closed the door before he even turned on the light. “Shit,” he muttered as he felt around on the wall for the switch, and just about the time he got the room to flood with light, he heard Jason and Ryan leave, the hotel room door clicking shut behind them. _Good. Now, I can call Mike really quick._

He fetched his phone from his pocket and pulled Mike’s name up, hitting the call button. He held it to his ear as he looked around the bathroom - double vanity, large open shower, a toilet and a bidet. Chester squirmed a little at the sight of that, and opted to sit on the toilet seat, facing away from it. He stared at himself in the large mirror that stretched across the entire side of the room while he waited for Mike to answer. 

Back in Chester’s L.A. apartment, Mike had already settled into the flannel sheets, propped on both pillows as he flipped channels on the tv, searching for something that would hold his interest. He was feeling low. He’d expected Chester to call by now, and it was late. _I know he’s probably busy, but I really thought he’d find some time by now._ It was almost to the point that Mike was ready to give up and go to sleep when his phone rang from where it was on Chester’s side of the bed, and he grabbed it quickly, putting it to his ear before it could even ring twice. “Hey,” he breathed into the phone, his spirits instantly lifting, even before he heard Chester’s voice. 

“Hey,” Chester responded. “You’re not sleeping, are you?” He looked at his watch, which still had L.A.’s time on it. He’d already decided he wasn’t going to change it, so he could keep track of where Mike was within the day. “It’s late there.” 

“I’m in bed, but no, I’m not sleeping.” _I was waiting on you,_ he added mentally. It sounded too desperate to admit that out loud, though, so he held back. “How was your flight? Wait, you texted me that it was fine.” Mike rolled his eyes at himself, he sounded so flustered. “Tell me about where you’re staying,” he decided instead, picturing some beachside resort in his head. 

“It’s just a standard hotel room,” Chester said as he stood up. Jason and Ryan were gone, so he could venture out of the bathroom. “We have a view of the beach though, which is really pretty. And the skies here are amazing. Aw, I wish you were here to see them. It’s not like at home where they’re gray and smoggy...they’re blue and you can see the clouds,” he said as he walked back over to his bed and sat down, looking out the wide window. 

“I wish I was there, too,” Mike said simply, feeling the sadness tugging at his heart. It had only been one day. A week seemed impossible. “It’s not the same here without you.” With his free hand he reached over to where Chester usually lay beside him and felt the coldness of the blanket instead of the warmth he always encountered. “I miss you,” he said, his voice low.

Chester smiled, his piercing pressing against his lips as he looked down, his eyes concentrating on his legs. “I miss you, too. But we’re one day down, just six more to go. Wish I was there in bed with you. You’d die if you felt how horrible the beds are in this room.” Chester tried to bounce up and down, but the mattress didn’t have much give. “It’s going to be a lot of sleepless nights.” 

Mike nodded, swallowing the lump in his throat before he realized Chester couldn’t see him. “That’s no good. I hope you get some rest before you come back to me. I don’t want you to be too tired…” He let his voice trail off, not saying what he wanted to say next. _I don’t want you to be so tired we can’t finally take this to the next level._

“I’m sure I’ll manage.” Chester checked his watch. _Dammit._ “Hey, I can’t really talk long. Not that I don’t want to. God, no. If it was up to me we’d talk for the next three hours…but I’m being forced to go down to dinner with everyone.” He shut his eyes for a minute. He could almost feel the disappointment coming through the phone as he waited for his boyfriend to say something. 

“Oh.” Mike stopped for a second before he found his voice. “Oh, okay. Well… I guess we’ll talk tomorrow?” He let the question hang there, wishing they could talk more now. He hadn’t heard enough of Chester’s voice. He hadn’t gotten to tell him about his day, or update him on the progress of the amount of pie he’d eaten while waiting for his call. There were a lot of mundane, everyday things he wanted to share with his boyfriend, but work was calling.

Chester nodded, even though Mike couldn’t see him. “Yeah, tomorrow,” he agreed. He felt his phone buzz with a text, and he knew it would be Mark or Jason, telling him to come on. “I gotta go,” he said. “But I…” He stopped himself, pursing his lips together for a moment before he tried again. “I’ll take some pictures to send you tomorrow. Show you the hotel room and the beach, we can pretend we’re together,” he offered, his heart feeling heavy at the suggestion. He wasn’t even sure if it had made sense. 

Mike closed his eyes and held on to the blanket, imagining he was holding onto Chester’s shirt. “Okay. That sounds good.” He tried to keep his voice even, to not let the disappointment seep through. “Can’t wait.”

“I really gotta go now,” Chester said as his phone buzzed again. He stood up and headed for the door, grabbing his keycard to the room off the dresser as he went. “Sleep well in our comfy bed. I’ll call you tomorrow.” He waited for a second before he added, “talk to you later, okay?” 

“‘K. Bye, Ches,” Mike said as the call ended. He clicked the tv off and set the phone and remote on the bedside table, snuggling down into the sheets before he thought of something. _Chester said ‘our bed.’_ The thought brought a flash of happiness across his mind, pushing away the sadness he’d felt over the short phone call. _Our bed. Well, if it’s our bed, that means I can sleep in it the way I’d sleep in my own bed._

He sat up and tugged his white undershirt off by the collar and tossed it on the floor next to the bed, then wiggled out of Chester’s pajama pants he’d put on instead of his own. Dropping those next to the bed, he lay back down, pulling Chester’s pillow close and closing his eyes, imagining it was Chester beside him. He could do this, make it through the next six days. He’d just have to stay busy, since it seemed that Chester was going to be working a lot more than he’d expected and their time on the phone would be limited. No sense in sitting around waiting, he decided, and within minutes, snuggled into their bed, Mike was asleep. 

****

Chester sat at the hotel bar, his fingers laced around the stem of a martini glass as he waited for Mike to text him back. It had been three days already, and he’d never missed someone so much in his life. He yawned as he scooted his drink forward and he put his elbows on the counter. It was the end of the day, but he couldn’t go back upstairs to his room. Not yet. Ryan had made it clear that he was going to be occupying it for a bit, and Chester was fine with that. He hadn’t seen anyone else from their crew for the last twenty minutes, and as he sipped on his second drink, he was tempted to give up on texting and head out to the patio to call Mike, people around or not.

His phone vibrated and he looked down to see the screen illuminated with Mike’s reply text. 

**7:14 pm** _Second martini? How’d you get that?_

Chester read the text twice, his head already starting to feel a little fuzzy as he texted back.

**7:16 pm** _I’ve got a fake I.D. for things like this. My boss gave it to me. He gives us all one. All of us who aren’t 21. No big deal._

Mike frowned from the comfort of their bed at home. _Fake I.D.? That doesn’t seem like something you’d get from your boss. But maybe there’s a reason. I don’t know what that could be though._

**7:18 pm** _That’s weird. I don’t see why you’d NEED to drink to do your job._

Mike looked down at the text as soon as he sent it and regretted it. It was judgemental, and one thing he’d learned was that Chester was not very receptive to questions about his job. Immediately he fired off another text.

**7:18 pm** _I just mean, I’ve never heard of that._

Chester’s face screwed up as he read Mike’s back to back texts. He let out a huff. He could practically hear Mike’s voice in his head as he read them. 

**7:20 pm** _I don’t need to drink, and I’m not working right now. It’s just to relax. I can’t go back up to my room, Ryan’s up there with… someone. So until he texts and says it’s okay, I’m stuck down here and a drink sounded nice. It’s been a long fuckin’ day._

Not only did the tone of the text hurt Mike’s feelings, he had to read it twice to be sure it said that Ryan was in the room. Chester’s room. He hadn’t mentioned having to share with anyone. But then, it wasn’t unusual to have to share a room on business trips, that much Mike knew from hearing his dad bitch about traveling. He didn’t want to fight over the phone, there would be such little time to talk later, and Mike didn’t want to spend the entire time apologizing or feeling strained. He sighed and turned over on his stomach, propping himself up on his elbows.

**7:23 pm** _Sorry. That sucks you have to share a room with someone that inconsiderate._

**7:25 pm** _It’s not inconsiderate. It’s just the way it is. It’s always like that. This. Whatever. I miss you. I’d so tackle you right now if you were hereee._

**7:26 pm** _I think you’re giving this guy a pass, but okay. And if you were here I’d have no problem with that._ Mike smiled, imagining Chester pinning him down to the bed.

Chester took a swallow of his drink before he reread Mike’s last text. He grinned, his face feeling hot as the ukelele music played throughout the bar. He was so sick of ukuleles. Curse anyone who played one. He picked his phone up and shot his reply, his mouth twitching with a giggle he wasn’t quite in control of. 

**7:30 pm** _Ohhhh Sexy Boy, can’t wait till I get home. Just a few more days and I’ll have to hold myself back. Or, not hold back. lol_

Mike’s stomach fluttered as he thought about Chester coming home. He’d already started thinking of the apartment as home, as bad as that was. It was easy to imagine he lived there with his boyfriend, and he’d be waiting for him when he returned just as if they did live together. Mike couldn’t wait. 

**7:31 pm** _What if I tell you I don’t want you to hold back?_ He grinned at the phone. It didn’t matter that Chester couldn’t see him.

Chester cocked an eyebrow at his phone. He licked his lips, his clouded mind conjuring up his reserved mental images of Mike - his deeper than dark eyes, his hoop earrings that Chester was more than fond of. His blue spiked hair, and the way he said Chester’s name. _Ches. He calls me Ches. I like it._ He grinned as he typed back.

**7:34 pm** _You’re a tease. But I like it. I know we didn’t really talk about it when it happened, but I wanted us to fuck the other night before everything happened. I know… I mean, I was wanting it. You._

Mike blinked as he read the text, then read it again, little tingles of electricity shooting through his limbs. _Fuck. Jesus, when he says it, it’s not offensive. It’s kind of hot. No, not kind of. It’s hot. And yeah, I wanted it. Bad._ He shook his head, not sure what to say in return to that. He didn’t want to say the wrong thing.

**7:35 pm** _Yeah. Me too._ He held his breath and waited to see what response he’d get.

Chester’s eyes brightened a little at Mike’s response. It was no secret between them that they were both anxious to get their first time across the finish line, but they’d never _really_ talked about it. Not like this. Mike could be so prudent sometimes, so innocent in his thought process, that Chester had always kept a guard on the way he phrased things, but as the alcohol continued to kick in, and with Mike’s willingness to keep going, Chester’s filter dropped away. 

**7:37 pm** _You have no idea. I’ve got spots picked out for us to fuck all around the loft lol don’t think I’m crazy, but I have plans. If you’re up for them. By the windows, on the stairs, in the shower._

Mike giggled and clamped a hand over his mouth, dropping his phone and rolling onto his back. Vague thoughts of what all Chester had planned for him filled his head, and he smiled at the ceiling fan as his hand fell to his side. _The stairs? How would that even work?_ He flipped back over and grabbed his phone.

**7:40 pm** _The stairs? Ches, you’re crazy. I think you’ll need to break me in easier than that._ Before he could stop himself he pressed send, then waited with his heart racing to see what Chester would say. It was too fun, flirting over text this way.

**7:42 pm** _The stairs are the best. The angles are perfect. You’ll love it. But we can start on the bed._ Chester stopped typing, his eyes shifting slowly over his wording. He could already imagine them on the stairs in his apartment. He’d have Mike on his knees with his hands one step higher, his ass sticking out. Chester grinned with a little snort, his dick twitching at the thought and he dropped his hand down under the bar. He pet himself overtop his jeans. 

_Easy, buddy, he’s not actually here. Unfortunately. Beach sex. I’d get him underneath the moon if he was though._ He stroked himself as best he could, feeling bits of pressure in the right places for a minute, before he snapped out of it and looked down at his phone. He hadn’t sent the text yet. 

He ran his fingers over the keyboard as he added, _I hope you’re happy, I just lapsed into a mindless moment of feeling myself up thinking about you on the stairs, and us on the beach fucking underneath the moon to the sound of the beautiful fuckin’ water here. If I wasn’t in public I probably would have went further with myself._ He giggled at his own words before he hit send. 

**7:43 pm** _So. Get out of the public._ Mike bit his lip and pressed send before he could talk himself out it. 

**7:44 pm** _I wiiishh. No room, remember? I’m stuck here, nursing my hard on for you instead._ Chester re-read that sentence. He wasn’t sure if he was or he wasn’t nursing something, but he didn’t care. He was pretty sure Mike would get it. Mike always seemed to get it. He took the last sip of his martini before he added, _But as soon as I can, I’m outta here._

**7:47 pm** _lol. You’re terrible. I think you’ve had too much to drink. You can’t be doing that in public._

He sighed again, wishing Chester were next to him. He knew exactly how to take care of that hard on. It was something Mike knew Chester enjoyed, and he felt like he’d learned everything his boyfriend liked when he went down on him. The final threshold to cross would be when he suggested doing it without the condom they’d both become so accustomed to… Mike knew it wasn’t the best way to receive a blow job, at least not that he’d heard. He’d never experienced it himself, but they were in a stable relationship. Maybe it was time to let that last barrier go.

Just thinking about it made Mike hard too, and he was having a difficult time not stroking himself as they texted away. He knew they should stop before something bad happened on Chester’s end, so he pressed send even though he really wanted to tease him some more. 

Chester’s response came right back. 

**7:50 pm** _Miiiike, I have to go. My boss is dragging me away. He’s looking for Jason and can’t find him. It means trouble. I can’t type and walk. I’ll try to call later._

**7:51 pm** _Be careful. I know how clumsy you can be. Call me later._ Mike frowned at the phone, all the playfulness from earlier dissipating rapidly. _Fuck this Jason guy. He’s always interrupting things. I don’t know why Chester has to go help find him._

It was late. They had been texting almost an hour, and Mike was tired. It was already almost eleven in L.A., and as he slid the phone onto the bedside table, he knew Chester probably wouldn’t call back. His boyfriend had been very aware of the time change and trying not to interrupt Mike’s sleep. _Until tonight, but that was probably the alcohol. He didn’t know what he was doing._

As he pulled the blanket up over his naked chest, he closed his eyes and tried not to worry. _He’s fine. He can handle himself. Even if he’s a little drunk. I know he’ll be okay. I can trust him._

****

Chester followed his boss into the hotel room. His drunken, sleepy eyes looked around the much nicer space than what he was sharing with Ryan. Mark had a full blown suite. A spa like bathroom and a kitchenette were at the front, along with a couch and seating area, which included a flat screen television. An actual bedroom was separate, and as Chester stumbled around the room, touching this and tripping over that, Mark was fuming. 

“You know I don’t care where he goes,” he barked as he watched Chester look out the floor to ceiling windows at the million dollar ocean view, “but he needs to let me know.” He scrubbed his fingers through his dark sandy hair that was starting to show a touch of gray that the forty-year-old despised. “Has he called you?” 

Chester turned around, fumbling his phone from his jean’s pocket. “No,” he said. “Not a word to me.” 

Mark grumbled as he walked over and slumped down on the couch, his face twisted as he steamed. “I hate having to repeat myself. You know that,” he said, flipping a hand across the room as Chester stumbled his way. “And Jason damn well knows it, too. When we’re on business trips, if you go off, you let me know. Even if you’re Jason. It’s not that hard.” 

Chester smirked toward his boss before he yawned, his body feeling heavy. It had been a long day, and his freewheeling martini drinking had gotten the best of him. He thought he’d only had two. . .but maybe it had been three. He was feeling dizzy as he peered around the doorway at the proper bedroom - double dressers, a closet, twin nightstands, a desk, an armchair with a footrest, and a king sized bed. _Lay down. I need to lay down._

“You should probably sit down, Chester. I think you’re a little too wasted to go back downstairs. That’s the last thing I need is for someone to call the cops because you dropped your trousers to piss in some hotel potted plant.” 

Chester turned around, the room spinning slightly as he laughed. “When have I ever peeeeed on something I’m not supposed to?” 

Mark smiled in amusement. “Believe me, Bennington, you’ve gotten into a few nasty situations. You don’t always remember stuff after you’ve had a few, but I’ve had to bail your ass out of a few close calls. Not sure what you’d do without me.” He let out a sigh as he sat forward, his elbows on the knees of his tan dress pants, his fingers pressing to his left temple. “You can stay here until Ryan’s done with the room. I should charge him extra for that.” 

“Extra,” Chester repeated with a giggle before he turned back around and lurched toward the massive bed with silky golden sheets and bright red pillows. He sat down, and then he fell over, his head hitting the feather pillow that felt like Heaven. He rolled onto his back, his body loving the feel of the comfortable mattress, which was nothing like the bed of rocks he’d been sleeping on for the last few nights. His mind was already starting to drift, his thoughts turning back to Mike and their texting conversation from before. He could see his boyfriend in his mind, lying in their bed at home and a sudden loneliness sunk through Chester’s hazy inner thoughts. 

From the couch, Mark’s eyes zeroed in as he watched Chester on bed. The younger man’s flat stomach was on display, since his shirt had pulled up on him when he’d laid down. Mark stayed where he was for a few minutes, watching Chester breathe, and lay in complete silence. “So, Chester,” he finally said as he stood up and went into the bedroom. He looked down, his gaze running from Chester’s tennis shoes all the way up his jeans and the bright blue belt that was holding them up, and then to his blue t-shirt that had a black dragon on the front of it. “Who, ah, who have you been calling and texting with the last few days?” 

Chester rolled his head, his eyes easing open a little. “What?”

“You know what? I think we need to get these shoes off of you,” Mark said as he shifted to the end of the bed, undoing the laces. “You can’t wear shoes in bed.” He waited a minute, letting his fingers skillfully work before he pulled the first tennis shoe off, and to no surprise, Chester’s sock matched the rest of his outfit - black with blue over the toes. _And a million dollars says his underwear matches, too._ He licked his lips before he asked again, “You’ve been talking with someone. . .everything okay with your mom?”

Chester’s eyes opened a little more as he picked his head up. “My mom’s fine. I talk to her all the time. You know I do.” 

“Okay, okay,” Mark said very diplomatically as he moved onto Chester’s other shoe. “So, who’s been getting all your attention then?” 

Chester’s head dropped back onto the pillow, before it swayed to one side. “My boyfriend,” he admitted. “Mike.” 

Mark stopped his de-shoeing, his eyes bolting up. “Boyfriend? Hmmm...and how long has this been going on?”

“A couple of months,” Chester answered, his voice slurred. “He’s amazing. Mike Shinoda.” His lips pulled up into a smile as he laid with his eyes closed. “He’s a piano teacher. He’s sexy as hell. And so funny. And he cares about everything and everyone. Like, actually cares. People and animals and flowers, and the state of the world and all that shit. My Sexy Boy. I miss him.” 

“You sound kind of smitten. Shinoda, huh? Is that Japanese?” 

Chester nodded, his eyes still shut as his consciousness was starting to fade in and out. “He’s like Jason. . .Japanese American. He has blue hair,” he said before he cracked up into a giggle. “An he loves flannel shirts!”

“Really?” Mark asked as he climbed onto the bed next to Chester. His hand traced slowly up the young man’s leg. “I have to say, Jason and I have noticed a change in you the last few weeks. Guess I have to assume that’s Mike’s influence.”

Chester didn’t say anything, and Mark let his feathering fingers dance around and over to the other leg. “It’s been a little concerning. Like you’re not enjoying the work as much.”

No response. 

“Hmmm,” Mark murmured to himself before he sat up a little better, his hand going up to Chester’s belt, and then to the soft skin of his belly. He slid his fingers from one side of Chester’s stomach to the other, dipping them down to try and get under the waistband of the jeans, but Chester’s belt was in the way. “Let’s get these pants off of you,” Mark whispered as he threw his leg over Chester’s to straddle him. Both his hands went to work on the belt buckle, and it was in that moment that Chester’s head went from one side to the other. 

“Don’t,” he muttered, swatting his hand clumsily toward his boss. “Mark, don’t. I can’t.” 

Mark’s piercing gray eyes glared at Chester’s words. “Why? You’ve always been willing before,” he shot back. One more tug and he’d have the belt undone and then he’d get the jeans down and he could have some fun. _Fun I’m fucking entitled to._

But Chester’s hand slapped at him in another drunken protest, his body struggling as he tried to wiggle under Mark’s pinning weight. “Mark, please, don’t. Not anymore,” Chester mumbled, his words still a little slurred. “I love Mike.” His eyes opened just enough to see the blurry outline of his boss hovered over his bottom half. “I love him.”

The comment halted Mark for a moment as he focused on Chester’s face - his parted lips as he breathed deeply and the piercing that was a crowd pleaser. At his long eyelashes and the hue in his flushed cheeks. “Love is tricky in our business, you know that,” Mark stated before he went back to work on Chester’s belt. He got it undone quickly and popped the button on Chester’s jeans next. “And if Mike loves you back, then he knows you have to play by the rules at work. He wouldn’t want you to get into trouble, would he? I mean, he doesn’t sound like that kind of guy. Surely he wants the best for you.”

Chester shook his head slightly. “He wouldn’t want me to get in trouble. Mike’s, like, the opposite of trouble. He’s all the good things.” 

Mark rubbed his hand up and down Chester’s covered thigh. “So then if your boss wants something, you need to go along with it, just like always. Right? That’s what Mike would want you to do.”

Chester’s eyes slid closed as he nodded. “Okay,” he whispered, his thoughts fading in and out. He had to say yes, even though it didn’t feel right. He wanted to be home with Mike. He wanted Mark to walk him back to his own hotel room so he could pass out on his crappy bed so tomorrow would come, and he would be one more day closer to going home. He wanted to be able to push Mark away as the older man tugged his jeans down off his hips. He wanted to tell Mike he loved him. He wanted to tell him he was sorry. And as the world behind Chester’s eyes faded into the dark abyss of intoxicated helplessness, a tear dripped down the side of his cheek.


	11. Arrival and Departure

The bedsheets were in the dryer already as Mike scrubbed the bottom of the pan he’d used in his not-very-successful attempt at making himself a grilled cheese sandwich for lunch. Thankfully it hadn’t been a complete loss. It had been ugly, but edible, though somehow he’d managed to burn the buttered bread on the bottom of the skillet, and it was proving difficult to clean off. Now he was yelling responses to the song he was listening to as he worked.

_Now why is everybody so petrified?_

“What?!”

_Petrified?_

“What?!”

_Step aside! And just drop that!_

“Come on!”

_Drop that!_

“Come on!” 

_Drop - that!_

“Come on… yes!” he exclaimed as he wrestled the last bit of burned bread free. “Stupid sandwich,” he muttered, putting the skillet in the dishwasher before drying off his hands and hanging the dish towel over the sink faucet. While the music played in the background he stood with his hands on his hips and looked around. Other than his easel set up in the corner by the window, and the smell of burned bread he needed to somehow diffuse, the apartment was spotless and ready for Chester’s return. 

Mike smiled, thinking of the way his boyfriend’s hand would curl around his neck and bring him in for their first kiss after a week apart. They’d been able to at least text every night, but not talk as much as Mike wanted, and he missed Chester terribly. Every night that he’d climbed into their bed alone he felt the tug of loneliness at his heart, and he’d realized as the week wore on how hard it was not to tell Chester he loved him. That he was in love with him. He’d almost said it the morning Chester left for Hawaii, but he’d chickened out. It was a big step for him.

_Love. I’ve never been in love. But there’s never been anyone like Chester, either. So spontaneous and fun, and he always remembers things other people forget, like gummy bears, and thinks of special things like flannel sheets… and he’s so sweet with me. And so fuckin’ hot._ Mike grinned as he thought of his boyfriend’s toned stomach, the tattoos he loved, and the lip ring that felt so good when Chester-

_BZZZZZZZZZ!!!_

The buzzer on the dryer startled Mike from his daydreaming, signaling that it was time for him to grab the fresh sheets and go up to make the bed. Their bed. Mike didn’t even want to think about going home to sleep alone in his own bed after spending the week at Chester’s. In his mind there was something intimate about sharing the bed together, even if they hadn’t had sex yet. He couldn’t imagine Chester in his bed in his small bedroom in his small apartment, but it was so easy to picture Chester’s sleepy good morning eyes and smile when he was laying upstairs, wrapped in the red and black flannel sheets. It was easy to imagine waking up there every morning, the very first part of every day being the gentle, warm kisses they shared before getting out of bed. It was easy to imagine sliding between the sheets in just his boxer briefs, they way he had the entire time Chester was away... only with Chester there beside him. 

_God. I miss him so much. The next few hours can’t go by fast enough._

As he carefully smoothed and pulled the sheets over the mattress, Mike’s thoughts drifted around, thinking about everything they had done in this room and on this bed. Always one step short of actually having sex in the week since Mike had declared he was ready, the week before Chester left on his trip. Always something had stopped them. He really hoped there would be nothing standing in the way tonight, when Chester finally made his way back home. The text messages and the sexy talk on the phone had been clear - they were both more than ready. 

Satisfied that the bed looked neat and clean, Mike made his way back downstairs and started to pack up the art supplies he had brought along. His overnight bag was already downstairs, right outside the bathroom door where he’d left it all week. It was just more practical to have his things already downstairs in the morning when it was time to get dressed, so he’d never moved it upstairs. Once everything was put away in the small crate he’d transported his supplies in, he stood back and looked at his painting, consumed by the hope that Chester would like it.

It was abstract, a depiction of the ocean that could be also interpreted as the horizon falling through a cliff or even icebergs in a far away distance with muddied snow up close. He’d layered on the acrylic paint to create texture, the lines blending and blurring where the ocean met the sand in the foreground and the clouds met the water in the background. Shades of blue and turquoise and seafoam green, frothy ocean whites and tans, peachy sandy colors and grays all stretched across the giant sofa length canvas. It had taken Mike all week to paint, and he was pleased with the result, knowing it would look perfect on the blank wall of Chester’s loft. He was terrified that Chester wouldn’t like it. Sharing artwork was like standing in front of his boyfriend without an undershirt - his entire soul felt exposed. This would be another way of opening himself up, becoming vulnerable, trusting someone else. But it couldn’t be scary… it was only Chester. Chester who was sensitive to his feelings and always put him at ease. It would be fine. 

Carefully he touched a corner of the painting, and was satisfied that it was dry enough to move so he could collapse the easel and pack it up as well. Mike leaned the painting against the window and put away the rest of his supplies, then took the crate to wait by the front door to be taken down to his car later. _Or hopefully tomorrow morning._

He sighed as he sat down the crate. _I don’t want to go home. This feels like home. What if he’s tired and just wants me to go home?_ Mike frowned, wondering what the next step was. _If it were Chester getting the place ready, he’d make an awesome meal and have it ready when I walked in the door. There would be dessert and some treat I’d forgotten I mentioned I wanted._ His shoulders slumped as he thought about Chester’s favorite meal. _Popcorn shrimp. And homemade mac and cheese… extra cheesy and creamy. I can’t make that. There’s no way I can do that._

Walking over to the couch, he sat down and put his face in his hands. _What am I going to do?_ He was in complete despair for several minutes, turning over options in his head that mostly revolved around the frozen food aisle at the grocery store, or the cheap fried seafood place on the corner back in his neighborhood. _His_ neighborhood. With a flash of inspiration, he thought of Anna. Anna knew how to make mac and cheese from scratch. He wasn’t even going to attempt the popcorn shrimp, but he could get Anna to tell him what to do to make the mac and cheese. That would be better than nothing, and anything was better than frozen shrimp, he was almost positive.

Mike glanced at his watch quickly and stood up, grabbing his keys from the bar and turning the music off before heading back toward the door. He decided to go ahead and scoop up his art stuff and take it with him; he’d drop it off at his place while he got instructions from Anna. Maybe if he was lucky she’d have time to watch him make it and make sure he didn’t mess it up. With his excited mood restored, Mike locked the door to Chester’s loft and started down the hallway to his car.

****

Anna had been more than helpful with her list of ingredients and directions, and Mike was comfortably in the home stretch. He checked his watch again as he stirred the cheese sauce. Chester was due home any minute now - he’d texted when he left the airport - and all Mike had to do was drain the spiral noodles and stir it all together. He was ridiculously proud of himself for not burning himself or ruining the cheese sauce by melting it too quickly. _It’s just noodles and sauce, no big deal, but it is his favorite, after all… it’s not a steak dinner, but he knows my limitations. Maybe it will be good enough._

The loft no longer smelled like burnt bread, which was a good thing. It was warm and cheesy smelling, comforting, and Mike was excited to spoon his dinner offering into a bowl for his boyfriend. He knew it wasn’t much, but he’d really wanted to try to do something special, the way Chester always did for him. 

The hallway felt longer than Chester remembered as he fixed his eyes on his apartment door. His back ached as he carried his bag over his shoulder and dragged his wheeled suitcase behind him. The jet lag from the six hour flight was already kicking in. _I can’t wait to see Mike. I wish we could have talked more over the week. Oh well. I’m here now._ A tired smile passed Chester’s lips as he got to the door and he tried the knob, but it was locked. He pulled his keys out and quickly opened the door. 

The first thing he saw was Mike, standing in the kitchen dipping something that smelled like cheese into two bowls, and Chester’s heart soared. He dropped his bags by the door after closing it, and shot across the space. “Hey,” he said, going right up to Mike at the bar. “You look like my dreams,” he purred, pulling him into an embrace. 

The spoon Mike was using to scoop mac and cheese into the bowls was forgotten the second he felt Chester’s arms around him. He turned and slid his hands around his boyfriend’s waist and squeezed him tightly, a huge smile across his face. “Mmmm, I hope they were good dreams,” he giggled, and it felt like a missing piece clicked into place inside Mike’s heart. “God, I missed you so much!” 

Chester’s arms were around Mike’s next, their heads pressed close. “Mike, you have no idea,” Chester mumbled, his body resting a little more against his boyfriend then he intended. “And every dream about you is good. I swear, thoughts of you were my fuel while I was gone.” He held on a second longer, loving the feel of Mike’s body, and the safe, secure sensation that it brought with it. He moved his head, letting his lips kiss to the other man’s ear, and then he pulled back enough to let their lips touch, soft and gentle at first before Chester’s hand slid to cup Mike’s neck and everything went deep. 

Thoughts of work and the past week started to fade for a moment as Chester lapped up the attention and closeness. “I’m so glad to be home,” he breathed as they separated. 

Mike could feel the flush in his cheeks as he looked at Chester’s lips that just rendered him breathless. It was all he could do to not pull Chester back for more, and he struggled for a moment with himself before practicality won. Surely after all of that travel, Chester was hungry. And he probably wanted a shower. He slid his hands from where they were resting on Chester’s back to his hips and took a tiny step back, glancing at the stove. “Are you hungry? I made you something.” _It’s the right thing to do, food. Not jump his ass the moment he walks in the door._

Chester followed Mike’s eye line to the stove to see an empty, cheesy covered pot. His nose led him to look at the bar next, and there the real prize was - two massive bowls of macaroni and cheese. “You cooked?” he asked, a feeling of surprise sweeping him as he let go of Mike completely to take a step closer to the food. He picked up a spoon that was sticking out of one of the bowls, noodles and and melted cheese coming with it. He looked back at Mike. “You made this for me? I mean, it looks and smells amazing. It’s like liquid gold to my eyes and stomach.” 

Mike knew he was grinning like crazy watching Chester with the sad attempt at dinner he’d made. “I wanted to have shrimp, too, but… you know, I have no idea how to make that. And you are probably sick of seafood anyway, so I thought, what’s better than just a big bowl of mac and cheese?” _Shut up, Mike, you’re babbling. It’s not like you made a five course meal, stop talking._ “Anyway,” he took a deep breath and tried to lower the excitement in his voice, “you wanna go eat on the couch? It’s a lot comfier than the table.”

Chester let out a long sigh, his body feeling heavy as he sidestepped back to his boyfriend. He laced his arm around his waist and nuzzled his nose and lips to his jawline. “Thank you,” he whispered. “It’s exactly what I need.” He pet his lips against his warm skin before he let him go. He grabbed his bowl of food, and headed for the couch, his eyes flashing over his loft. “Did you stay here all week?” he asked, partly over his shoulder. “It looks so clean like no one has been here.” He slumped down on the couch, a groan escaping him as he sat back against the comfortable cushions. _I love this couch. I would fuck it if I could._

“Yeah, I stayed here,” Mike said as he followed Chester to the couch and watched him sink into the cushions. “I didn’t want you to come home to a mess. Not that I made a mess or anything.” He sat his bowl on the coffee table and looked down at Chester, who looked so comfortable that he and the couch had practically become one entity. “Did you want something to drink? I’ll get it for you.” Mike cocked his head to the side and waited, taking in the loud red and white Hawaiian shirt Chester was wearing.

“Water would be great,” Chester said, blowing on his first spoonful of noodles. He watched from the corner of his eye as Mike headed back to the kitchen. It felt good to be home, and as Chester slurped down two more gulps of noodles, a rather large art canvas sitting over by the windows caught his attention for the first time. He knew that Mike had been painting while he’d been gone, but he hadn’t figured on something so big. It was turned around backwards, and even as Chester sat a little forward to try and see something more than the wooden frame, he was at a loss over what it was. “Did you paint this beast over here?” he asked, turning in his seat to see Mike still getting cups of water. “It’s, like, bigger than the other ones I’ve seen of yours.” 

Ice water in both hands, Mike headed back toward the couch, shrugging his shoulders as he walked. “Yeah, but you can’t see it yet. Food first, then you can worry about whether or not it’s too big for your space. Or even if you like it,” he added, trying to keep his voice light. He didn’t want to think about Chester not liking what he’d painted. That would be enough to ruin the entire evening, and Mike wasn’t going to let anything ruin their reunion.

He put both glasses on the coffee table and picked up his bowl, sliding down next to Chester on the couch and taking a bite. “Hey, it’s better than I thought it would be. What do you think?” It wouldn’t take long for him to finish off the cheesy noodles, then it was painting time. 

Chester held up his half-empty bowl. “Perfect,” he said, as something bright crossed his face. “So that big thing is the one you were painting for me?” he asked, a slight warmth curling around his insides. “Mike, you didn’t have to do that. I mean, I want to see it,” he said sitting forward. He was tired, but the thought that his boyfriend had gone through so much trouble for him was sparking a new energy. “I’m pretty sure I’m faster than you,” he snickered, tossing Mike a sly grin. “And I’m sitting closer. . .bet I could beat you to it.” 

Before Mike could even react, Chester was off the couch and halfway to the painting. He barely had time to swallow the bite he was savoring as he set his bowl down again. “Damn it, Chester!” he exclaimed, running after him. The space wasn’t big enough to afford Mike the chance to catch up, though, and by the time he reached Chester, his hands were already on the canvas. “Okay, okay, fine. Step back. I’ll turn it around so you can see it.”

He didn’t really have time to be nervous about showing off his work, a week’s worth of collected hours here and there that combined to make his beach escape. Leaning it away from the window, he picked it up carefully and turned in a semi-circle until he was facing Chester, the painting between them. “Well… here it is. All done in acrylics,” he mumbled, feeling his cheeks turn red.

Chester had taken a few steps back, to give Mike room to turn the art piece around. Little jumps of excitement and anticipation cascaded through his belly as he watched. There were elements of the ocean and snow and things he wasn’t even sure of, but it had a beautiful kind of simplicity to it. He could feel the care and time that Mike had poured into the painting, and Chester couldn’t help himself. He stepped back up to the canvas, his hand cupping Mike’s. “I love it,” he said, a smile following his words. “I...I love it,” he repeated. “I think it’s gorgeous. Like you.” He leaned forward, letting his lips say everything else for him in his kiss. 

All of the nerves he’d felt over showing his painting to his boyfriend dissolved when their lips met, when Mike felt the love behind Chester’s tender kiss. His whole body relaxed in that brief moment before Chester leaned away from him and he remembered he was still holding the canvas. “I’m so glad you like it,” he said softly, happiness taking the place of his anxiety. “Maybe we can hang it later. Probably not tonight, I know you’ve got to be tired. Maybe tomorrow.” 

He turned back around, and Chester scooted out of the way to make room for him to return the painting to rest against the window, this time facing where it could be seen. “Are you finished eating? Did you need anything else?” 

“We can hang it tomorrow,” Chester said as he sat back on the couch. “And I need to go take a shower. The last eight hours have been a nightmare,” he said with a yawn. “Jason and Mark did nothing but fight the entire time. Six hours of them bickering, and all morning before that. I swear, Mike, I almost jumped off the plane just to get away from them.” 

“Well, I’m glad you didn’t,” Mike said, ready to finish off his dinner. “You want to go shower now? I can clean up and be ready to just chill once you’re done. What do you think?” He reached over and ran his hand down Chester arm, then tugged at the hem of his Hawaiian shirt. “I bet you’re ready to get this hideous thing off, aren’t you?” 

Chester rolled his eyes. “Mark made us all wear them to do a group photo before we left. I’ve never felt like such a tourist in my whole life. I’m thinking of burning it later for some sort of vindication.” He looked Mike’s way, cracking a smile. “It could be fun.” 

Mike shook his head and looked toward the balcony. “I don’t think you’re supposed to have open flames here, Ches.” 

Chester leaned over, bumping his shoulder into Mike’s. “You’re too good. Okay, Sexy Boy, I’m gonna go get clean and I’ll meet you back here.” He reached over and patted Mike on his leg, letting his fingers linger for a second. “I really do like the painting,” he said, his voice dropping to something lower. “I’ve never seen anything quite like it. Did you have fun looking at the ocean while you worked? Was it inspiring, or whatever?” 

“Oh, it was perfect.” Mike let his eyes drift back over to the windows yet again, and he thought about the hours he’d spend sitting there, painting. Waiting. “It made the time go by faster while I… while you were away. I could sit there and look outside and think of ways to make you smile later when we talked, and the painting part, it just happened. It was a good place for my mind to be.” He looked at Chester again, all of the loneliness and longing showing in his eyes. “I’m really happy you’re home.”

“Every time, Mike, you made smile every time.” Chester grabbed one last kiss from Mike’s soft lips before he excused himself to go upstairs. He let out a sigh of relief as he stepped into his bedroom. “Bed,” he said, opening his arms wide, “I’ve missed you so much!” He belly flopped onto the mattress, soaking up the clean sheets and the comfortable mattress he loved. He could smell Mike’s scent lingering...the faint hint of coconut. “I love you,” Chester told the bed, his hips bucking a little. “I’m never going to leave you again.” He raised his head to kiss the sheets. 

If circumstances would have been slightly different, that would have been it. Chester would have stayed there all night, humping the mattress and declaring his love for it until he passed out. But he didn’t have time for all that. Instead, he forced himself to stand back up. “Closet!” he yelled as he made his way over and flung both doors open his face beaming at his rows of clean clothes. “God, I love being home.” He quickly picked out a tan and black t-shirt before he went to get a pair of black pajama bottoms and black underwear to go with them. He snatched a pair tan and black socks, and then he was off, headed for the shower. 

“Mike!” he said, just as he stepped back into the living space. “Don’t let me forget, when I get out of the shower, I have a surprise for you.” 

Mike looked up from the kitchen, where he was rinsing the dishes before putting them in the dishwasher. “Oh, I love surprises. You better hurry your fine ass up in that shower. Don’t make me come in there and drag you out.”

“I don’t know,” Chester said as he headed for the front door to grab his bag of toiletries to take to the bathroom with him, “that almost sounds tempting. I might have to take extra long just so you’ll come get me.” He wiggled his eyebrows toward Mike as he headed back by him, and without another word from either of them, Chester shut the bathroom door behind him. 

The thought _was_ tempting, but Mike just shook his head and finished the dishes. It didn’t take long, and he was standing in the kitchen wondering what to do for the next eighteen or so minutes it would take Chester to wrap up his bathroom routine. Revealing his painting had gone well, so that bit of anxiety was passed, replaced with anticipation over whatever surprise Chester had for him, and thoughts of later. 

With nothing left to do, Mike grabbed his phone from the bar and went to stretch out on the couch, his head propped up on one arm as he flipped through his social media quickly. Nothing caught his eye and he dropped the phone to his side and closed his eyes, listening to the shower and thinking about Chester in the bathroom, naked and wet. He was lost in imagining the water falling over Chester’s face, his head leaned back and his neck exposed for Mike to suck on, when he heard the water stop. A slow smile drifted over his face as he reached down and shifted his partial erection to a more comfortable position. He was ready for Chester to get back to the couch.

In the steam-filled bathroom, Chester wiped his hand over the mirror, leaving a clear space so he could see himself. His eyes looked tired, and he felt it just as much. He let out a yawn as he grabbed a towel and fluffed his red-tipped mohawk, leaving it down and unstyled, other than running a quick comb through it. He brushed his teeth and quickly got dressed, before he stepped out into the much cooler loft, the change in temperature making him shiver for a second. 

He walked over to the couch, looking down at Mike. “You look awfully comfortable,” he said, smacking Mike’s naked foot playfully. 

“You wanna come down here?” Mike asked with a raised eyebrow. “That’s the only way i could be more comfortable right now.”

“Tempting,” Chester said, his fingers running over Mike’s foot and toes now, picking at each one. “But I want to give you your present,” he said with a final pat to the arch of Mike’s foot before he headed back toward the front door. He dug through his suitcase, and with the black box in his hand, he headed back to the couch. “So we had to go to this music store while we were down there,” he said as Mike sat up, and Chester sat down beside him, one leg tucked up under him as he sat sideways. “And don’t ask why, it was just stupid,” he had to add with an eye roll, “but while we were there, I saw this and had to get it for you.” He handed the box to Mike. 

Mike didn’t even hesitate. He loved presents and surprises, and the simple fact that Chester had seen something and was compelled to get it for him made it doubly exciting. He lifted the lid from the box, and nestled inside was a watch. Not a plain jane boring watch - he saw it had Chester’s personality all over it as he plucked it from its casing. It had a piano key pattern on the leather band, and the face had music notes where the 12, 3, 6, and 9 would usually be. “Ches, this is awesome! Wow, thank you! I love it!” 

Immediately he set the box aside to try it on, looping it over his wrist and adjusting it so he could hold out his arm and see how it looked. “What do you think?” he asked proudly.

Chester couldn’t have been happier as he watched Mike fall over the small gesture he’d brought all the way back from Hawaii. “I think it suits you really well,” he said, his eyes drifting from the watch, up Mike’s arm and to his face. “I knew the minute I saw it, that you’d love it. And I know your other watch is kinda older.” 

“You were right. I do love it, and it definitely is time for an upgrade.” Mike gazed down at the new watch again for a minute and then scooted closer to plant a wet kiss on Chester’s cheek. “It means even more to me that you brought it back from your trip. Maybe you missed me a little bit?”

Chester reached over, his hand getting lost in Mike’s blue hair, which was soft and clean and free of styling products. Chester glanced up just catching a faint reflection of him and Mike in the window and he smiled. Their combined purple hair was a mess. “Yes,” he said, dropping his gaze back to his boyfriend. “I’ve missed you. Like crazy.” He paused for a moment as another yawn hit him. “We should go upstairs,” he suggested. “Lay down on our comfy bed. I mean, I was humping it earlier out of sheer giddiness. You missed it,” he smirked. “Probably not my finest hour.” 

There it was, the invitation to stay another night, and Mike couldn’t stop himself from smiling as he shook his head and rolled his eyes in response to the rest of what Chester had said. “I’m actually kinda glad I missed that,” he teased. “Let me go brush my teeth, I’ll meet you up there.” 

He hopped off the couch and dug around in his packed bag for the smaller bag that had his bathroom stuff in it. Turning around, he coaxed, “seriously. Go on up, I’ll turn off the lights down here.” 

“I’m going. Slowly, but I’m going,” Chester said as he pulled his leg out from under him. It wasn’t super late yet, but he wasn’t going to make it much longer. The thought of curling up with Mike in their bed was such an intriguing thought as he stood up. _Well, maybe we can fool around a little first. Maybe just a little. Anything more than that and I don’t have it in me to bust out the conversation for it to happen. Not tonight._ He dragged his feet up the stairs, his mind running now with what Mike might be expecting. What they hadn’t gotten to do before he had left for Hawaii. Sex had become a weird unreachable thing between them as of late, and Chester knew that was more him than Mike at this point. Before they could actually go all the way, he was going to have to be totally honest, and the risk to that was too much to think about tonight, when he’d already been away from Mike for so long. 

He laid down on top of the flannel sheets, his back loving the familiar feeling of the bed he was so used to. He crossed his arms behind his head as he shut his eyes, waiting for his boyfriend to hurry and join him. 

Mike finished brushing, sliding his tongue over his top teeth and feeling the clean smoothness as he looked at himself in the mirror. His eyes were bright with anticipation. _I know he’s tired, but maybe he’s not that tired. I know he’s been waiting for this longer that I have. I wonder…_ He frowned for a second as he looked at himself, pondering what to do. _I want to tell him. I want to go up there and just be brave and tell him that I love him._

The anxious butterflies he’d managed to keep under control since Chester walked in the door earlier that evening were back in full force. Mike dried off his tooth brush and carefully set it on the counter, and took a deep breath, blowing it out slowly to try to get his nerves under control. _All of this build up and now I’m scared. I don’t know if I can just say it. I don’t know what this is going to be like, or how I’m going to feel afterwards. It’s like I’m going to be someone completely different._ He looked in the mirror again and rolled his eyes at himself. “Go, stop talking yourself up,” he whispered.

He flipped the lights off in the bathroom and was making his way across the loft to turn off the other light when his eyes landed on his phone. He picked it up from where he’d left it on the couch and opened his text messages.

**8:17 pm** _Not coming back tonight either. See you tomorrow sometime._

He pressed send to let Anna know he was staying the night again, turning the phone to silent and setting it on the bar with his keys. It was all the stalling he had left, and he turned off the lights and headed upstairs. 

With each step he felt his nervous energy rising, until he stepped into the loft and his eyes settled on Chester. He was stretched out on the bed, the side of his face illuminated by the soft glow of the lamp on the bedside table, a thin strip of skin about the waistband of his pajama pants showing. Mike stood at the top of the steps for a second, taking in the welcome sight of his boyfriend back where he belonged, back in their bed, waiting for him, and without realizing it the butterflies disappeared.

Making his way over to the bed, Mike crawled up to the center where Chester lay, bracing himself on both hands as he slid one leg over Chester’s and sunk his hips down, feeling all the warmth of his boyfriend’s body that he’d missed so much. He leaned forward and kissed Chester’s chin gently before he whispered, “hey… you aren’t asleep, are you?” 

Chester pulled his arms out from behind his head, wrapping them lazily around Mike’s neck. “No,” he answered, his voice soft. “Just waiting for you.” He tugged his arms, and Mike didn’t resist. Chester closed his eyes as he welcomed the affection, the body heat, the man he’d missed so much over the last the seven days. He ran one hand up the back of Mike’s head, letting his fingers massage their way into Mike’s hair as they kissed, and their tongues danced. 

Chester felt his dick start to come to life at Mike’s slight movements and as their kisses grew hotter. Tighter. There was a need rising up in Chester’s stomach, a need for more. He shoved his hands up under Mike’s shirt, his fingertips greedy for the skin he knew by heart. 

With all the energy flowing between them, Mike made a face as he pulled away from their heated kisses. It felt criminal to stop what was feeling so good, but he didn’t want to wait any longer to feel their skin pressed together, it had been a week and it felt like forever. Sitting up on his knees for a minute, he reached for the collar of his shirt, pulling it off and tossing it to the floor without another glance, then tugging at the hem of Chester’s t-shirt. “Let’s get rid of this one, too,” he said, surprised at the raspiness in his voice. 

Chester didn’t say anything as he sat up enough for Mike to help him off with his shirt, and then it was gone, onto to the floor with the other shirt. “Now, where were we?” Chester asked, as he laid back down and licked his tongue out to flip his lip ring from one side to the other. A second later, Mike’s lips were on his, with an animalistic type of flavor. Their bodies rocked together, the bed shaking slightly with the motion. 

Chester gasped for breath as their kiss broke. His face was hot, his cock screaming to be let out and allowed to do its work as Mike kissed down his jawline and onto his neck. “Fuck, Mike,” Chester moaned, his arms going around the younger man’s back. He stared up at ceiling fan for a half a second before he closed his eyes. 

The heat and the smell of Chester’s skin under his lips was exactly the way Mike remembered it as he’d indulged fantasies of his boyfriend for the past week. He dragged his lips across Chester’s collarbone as he pressed his hips down harder, groaning softly at the welcome pressure on his dick. He’d been thinking about this all week, what it would feel like to be together again, and it was better than the memories his mind could drag up. 

Leaning on one elbow, Mike slid a hand between Chester’s ass and the mattress, pulling the other man up just a little bit as he nipped a small bite where his neck and shoulder met. “You feel so good,” Mike mumbled into his skin, somehow managing to pull Chester over on his side with him, looping a leg over his waist to try to get a bit more friction going. He trailed his fingertips up Chester’s arm and then up his neck before cupping his head in his hand, stroking his thumb over the velvety soft short hair by his ear. It was easy to deepen their kiss this way, and Mike pulled him closer, toying with the lip ring before delving his tongue deep inside, seeking warmth and the taste of Chester. He felt the tingles of excitement move up his limbs as they kissed. _I wonder how this will go, if he wants me on my back while we fool around some more? We’ve only talked about this in general terms, I don’t really know what to do next._

Chester’s hand dropped to Mike’s covered ass. He pulled the other man tighter up against himself as they kissed and rubbed. They’d been here before. Over the weeks, they’d gone from making out, to blow jobs and hand jobs, to most recently involving some anal play. It had been a step toward their ultimate goal, a goal Chester could tell Mike was after tonight. 

Chester opened his eyes, his heart pounding hard with exhilaration as his mind snapped to reality. Going all the way wasn’t going to happen tonight, and letting Mike think it was, wasn’t right. It would just lead to frustration and blue balls, and that wasn’t fun for anyone. _Gotta be careful. Gotta say it just right. Fuck, I want him though. Maybe we go for it anyway and I tell him tomorrow._

This new thought shot through Chester’s mind as he trailed his hand up Mike’s naked side, lusting after his skin. He could feel his boyfriend’s muscles, the way they wrapped around his body, taut and delicious. Chester heard himself moan as he bucked his hips and something else flashed across his mind: _If I don’t tell him first, that might be the end. He’ll think I was using him. It will be worse if I wait. I can’t do that to him. I can’t. . .I can’t take away his choice. It’s his first time...his first time._

Chester pulled away from Mike’s aggressive lips. “Hey, Mike, stop,” he panted, letting go. 

Through a haze of hormones, Mike both felt and heard the sudden change in Chester’s response to his touches, his kisses, and he felt his stomach clench with anxiety. _Am I doing something wrong? I don’t want to stop, whatever’s wrong… I don’t want to stop._ “What’s wrong?” he asked, cracking his eyes open a bit and leaning his head back to look at Chester. 

“Nothing’s wrong,” Chester said, knowing that Mike needed to hear that. He gently put his hand back on Mike’s hip, massaging him with feather like movements. “But I’m running out of steam. It’s not that I don’t want to,” he was sure to add quickly when he saw the shift in Mike’s face. “But I’m exhausted. My body isn’t up for something full blown tonight. And call me a romantic,” he said with a half smile, “but I’m looking forward to giving you everything I got for our first time. For _your_ first time...and that wouldn’t be the case tonight.” 

It was all Mike could do not to protest, not to try to convince Chester that everything would be fine. The rational part of his brain knew that he didn’t know enough to guide them along, and that Chester had to be tired from traveling, but he still felt the sting of rejection for a moment. Just for a moment, before the shame of selfishness washed over him. He’d been so wrapped up in himself, how _he_ felt and what _he_ wanted that he hadn’t stopped to really consider how Chester might be feeling. He bit his bottom lip and took a deep breath, willing his body to calm down for just a minute so he could think. The stiffness of his cock pressed against Chester’s wasn’t helping him think rationally. He knew Chester wanted it as badly as he did, but it just wasn’t going to happen tonight. But _something_ had to happen to get rid of both their hard ons. Neither of them were going to sleep like that.

Mike struggled up on one elbow and touched the end of Chester’s nose with his finger. “Sorry. I got carried away, I wasn’t thinking. I know you’re tired. Here, why don’t you lay back, and let me take care of this,” he said softly, placing his palm flat against Chester’s erection.

“I’m always up for that,” Chester said, dropping his hand down to cup it over Mike’s. “I’m sorry,” he whispered. “I know this keeps getting interrupted, but tomorrow will be better. I’ll be rested and everything will be...it will just be better. We can always do after breakfast sex,” he suggested, squeezing Mike’s hand, before he let go and rolled onto his back. 

Hooking his fingers over the waistband of Chester’s pajama pants, Mike tickled his boyfriend’s skin lightly and watched the corners of his lips turn up in a smile. “After breakfast sex sounds… good…” Up on his knees again, he tugged at Chester’s bottoms until he lifted his ass a bit, allowing Mike to slide both the pajamas and his underwear down and toss them away. He ran both hands up Chester’s legs, gently spreading, then crawling in between them, placing tiny kisses up one thigh as he went. 

Mike felt the quiver in Chester’s legs, the same as always, as he settled in to take what was his. He’d grown to love getting his boyfriend off this way, and he liked to think he was fairly good at it. A few more teasing kisses all around his cock as Mike listened to his rapid breathing above, and he was ready for the condom and ready to feel Chester between his lips. He paused what he was doing and glanced up from under his eyelashes. “Wanna hand me a condom?”

Chester’s eyes opened, slowly. “Yeah,” he said, his breath a little labored. He reached over, smacking his hand toward the drawer of the nightstand, but it wasn’t happening. “Hang on,” he said, and he twisted and shifted enough to get it open and blindly fished one out. He got back into position quickly, handing the little packet to his boyfriend. _This is good. This is safe. We know this. I’ll take care of him next, and then we can get under the blankets and sleep forever._

The little packet put up more resistance than Mike was used to, and he frowned in annoyance. _The fuck. I never have trouble opening these._ He finally wrestled the packet open and the condom free, and he smiled sheepishly at Chester. “Sorry, it was being difficult.” He took the condom between his fingers and went to roll it down before he realized he had it going the wrong way. _Damn. You’d think I’ve never done this before. I don’t even know why we’re still using these._ He glanced up at Chester, who was watching him with his lips parted, breathing through his mouth and a borderline look of impatience on his face.

As he went to flip it over, he somehow managed to catch it on the finger of his other hand and instantly pulled a tear in the latex. “Fuck!” he breathed out in irritation. “Ches, I tore it.” He started to ask for another one, but then he looked at Chester, at his cock glistening with precum right in front of his face, and he just decided, _fuck it_ as he leaned over and stuck his tongue out, gently lapping at the head and getting his first real taste of Chester.

The moment Chester felt Mike’s soft, warm tongue touch his sensitive head, everything in Chester’s body stiffened. The feeling of his boyfriend licking the pure, naked skin of his shaft and the slit across the head of his dick was enough to make Chester grab the sheets with both hands. “Mike,” he breathed out, “stop.” He shut his eyes, his mind scrambling. “Stop,” he said again, just as a jolt of pleasure shot through his lower parts, and a moan followed. His head went back, his body surrendering to the sensation he’d been yearning for ever since the first time Mike had gone down on him. 

Mike flattened his tongue, pressing hard against the slit before he backed off, curling his tongue up underneath the head of Chester’s dick, licking all around before he rolled his lips over his teeth and slid down, taking just the tip into his mouth. From up above he heard another moan, the signal to keep going, and there was no reason in Mike’s head to stop. He’d heard Chester say it but he didn’t sound very convincing, and Mike knew he didn’t mean it. _It’s okay, we’ve been together, exclusively together for months now… and I love him. This is okay._

He breathed in through his nose as he started a bit more steady pace, bringing his hand into play at the base of Chester’s cock, stroking him lightly as he swirled his tongue and sucked lightly. He knew how much Chester liked a slow build, and he was going to do this right, this first time. It was so much easier without the condom, without the pull of the latex against his lips. It was warm and slick and Mike could taste Chester’s skin instead of the fake peach flavor he’d unfortunately grown used to. It was so much better this way.

One of Chester’s hands left the sheets to fumble around the top of Mike’s head. He still had his eyes closed as he let himself be taken. More than once the fleeting thought to say _stop_ again entered his mind, but he couldn’t bring himself to say it. It felt too good. And his orgasm was headed full steam ahead. _He can’t swallow it. He can’t swallow it until I tell him the truth._

A second later, Chester felt the pressure about to break inside of him. His legs tensed, his eyes shut as his back arched a little. Everything rushed forward, the stronghold he was trying so hard to keep was smashed open as his orgasm broke through. In one strong gush he felt it leave his body, and the sensation of it going into his boyfriend’s hot mouth instead of the tip of a condom brought on an extra punch. “Miiike!” he yelled, his fingers gripping into his boyfriend’s hair. An exaggerated moan came next as a second gush followed, and then his body hit the mattress flat again. Everything tingled in the absolute pleasure of the release, his mind cloudy. “Mike,” he whispered, his lips dry. 

The whole experience, start to finish, was new to Mike, and he squeezed his eyes shut as he tried to catch his breath, tried to gently lick away any last bits of cum before he sat back, his mind racing with what he’d just done. There wasn’t going to be any going back to condoms now, he was sure of it after the reaction he’d just gotten from his boyfriend. He dropped a few more gentle kisses around Chester’s fading cock as he let go and rubbed that hand gently over Chester’s stomach. “Hmmm?” he hummed, his face still buried in his boyfriend’s lap. He could feel the flush of arousal on his face and the tightness of his own pants, his body begging for Chester’s touch. 

Even though Chester still had his eyes closed, he covered his face with his arm anyway. It was too late. Mike had swallowed, and now there was no time left. He didn’t want to move. It had all felt so good, but it was wrong, and Chester took a deep breath before he said from behind his arm, “Mike, we...we need to talk.” 

Mike froze, his hand coming to a stop from the lazy circles he was petting over Chester’s stomach. _Wrong, I did something wrong. He’s mad, I should have stopped when he told me to. Why didn’t I stop when he told me to?_ He felt the panic rising in his chest but he tried to stay calm as he answered, “what’s wrong?”

Chester could hear the seconds ticking away on his watch, which was so close to his ear. “I need to tell you something. Something I’ve been wanting to tell you for a while. I...I’m sorry I waited so long.” He shivered before he finally moved his arm and opened his eyes. He shifted to sit up, and Mike moved to allow it. “There’s something you don’t know, and you n-need to know.” He paused, looking down at his naked body. _Fuck. I don’t need to be naked when I do this. That will make it worse._ He tossed Mike a short look, before he slid off the side of the bed and started to collect his clothes, pulling on his underwear and pajama pants as he spoke. 

“I know...I mean, the thing is, is I need to tell you about work.” He stood next to the bed, the corner of his eye catching sight of his tan and black t-shirt mixed together with Mike’s white t-shirt. He scooped them both up, and tossed the one to his boyfriend as he pulled his own t-shirt over his head and sat back down on the edge of the bed, keeping his feet on the floor. “The company I work for is called YRS,” he said, letting out a long breath. “That stands for Young Restless Sheets, but no one calls it that. It’s always just YRS. And we’re all pretty young, but I really wouldn’t call us restless. It’s a stupid name.” He stopped, twisting to look Mike’s way for some sort of something. 

Mike had watched Chester pulling on clothes and felt his anxiety over what was coming shoot through the roof. His hands were shaking as he twisted his shirt Chester had tossed back to him into tight knots one direction, then the other. His stomach felt sick as he tried to process that Chester was talking to him about work when they had just been in the middle of intimacy. It wasn’t making any sense. “You… you said…” Mike swallowed, his tongue feeling heavy in his mouth. “You said you worked in video production?” He hated the way his voice went up at the end, the way he sounded like he was begging for Chester to say he was right, and this YRS place didn’t have anything to do with that.

Chester nodded. He could feel his cheeks were still flushed from everything, and the bedroom felt hot, but Mike wasn’t completely freaking out yet, so Chester knew he had to keep going. “I do,” he said, a brief smile flipping across his face. “But, you see, Mike, I don’t work on the production side. I work on the other side of the camera. We make movies,” he admitted. He waited a minute, licking his lips and wishing he had a cup of water right about now as he tried to be careful about which words he picked. “We make...adult movies. For guys. Or, well, anyone, really. But we’re an all male cast.” 

Mike stared at Chester as though he were speaking a different language while his mind raced around, trying to make sense of what he was being told. _Movies. Adult movies? Like… is he talking about…_ “Porn?” he said softly, testing out the word like he was trying a new food the he wasn’t quite sure about, rolling it around in his mouth and thinking about it. “Is that what you’re talking about? You film porn movies?” 

“Gay porn,” Chester clarified. “Mike, believe me,” he said, his hand going to his chest. “I never meant for things to go like this between us. I mean, I never thought we’d...I just, I never.” He stopped and shook his head. That sentence, whatever it wanted to be, wasn’t happening. “I’m clean,” he said instead as he bent down and pulled a file folder from the bottom shelf of the nightstand. “We have to get tested every month. You can see my medical records right here, so you don’t have to worry about that.” He opened the file, showing it to Mike. His heart felt like it was about to explode as he kept waiting for Mike to say something. “I wanted to tell you before, but I kept thinking you wouldn’t understand that it’s just work, and it doesn’t matter. It has nothing to do with me and you.” 

Mike felt the nausea roll over him as he sat and listened, disbelieving, trying to shut out the reality of Chester pushing papers in front of him and telling him the reason he’d been putting off having sex with him was because he could just go and get it at work every day. He closed his eyes and turned away, fumbling with his t-shirt to try to pull it over his head with the taste of Chester still on his tongue. He felt exposed, used, and his heart ached. _But… I’m in love with you!_ he screamed in his head, unwilling to say anything yet, afraid of what might come out of his mouth. 

He finally got the shirt over his head and he tried to stand up, but his knees were shaking. It was too much, the reality of it all, and he just wanted to disappear, to go home, to crawl into his lonely bed and die right there. He’d trusted Chester, and he’d been lied to. “How could you not tell me?” he said slowly, staring at the floor, waiting until he could stand so he could get his things and go. It was over, it had to be. _Porn. I can’t stay here. I’m a teacher, for Christ’s sake. I have to go home._

Chester was breathing hard, his lips parted like it was hard to breathe. “I wanted to. But the closer we got, and the more I...the more I started to care about you and we started dating, I didn’t want you to leave. Mike, look at me. Please,” Chester begged as he stretched his hand out to try and reach his boyfriend’s arm. 

“I have to go,” Mike whispered, shaking his head. “I have to go, I can’t do this right now.” He knew if he stayed any longer he’d be throwing up in the bathroom, and his pride was already suffering enough. Somehow he managed to get to his feet, his head spinning as he walked toward the stairs. _I have to get out of here. I’m going to be sick._

Chester jumped to his feet. “Mike, wait,” he called, reaching out. “Don’t leave. Not like this. Let me explain.” It was dark in the room, and he couldn’t tell anything about the look on Mike’s face, other than it was seething of betrayal. Chester felt his heart pinch, as he took a step back. 

“No… no, I don’t want to hear it,” Mike said, even as he felt his heart shattering. He desperately wanted Chester to say something that would take it away, that would put things back the way they were ten minutes ago, when everything was perfect and he was happy. _Happy, I was happy. And I trusted you!_

He turned away and felt his way down the steps, blindly feeling along the wall at the bottom of the stairs until he hit the light switch and the room lit up. Blinking against the brightness of the lights, Mike moved across the room, grabbing his bag from next to the bathroom and his phone from the bar. When he turned around, Chester was between him and the door.

“Chester. Don’t,” he said, his voice breaking. He couldn’t do it right now. He was about to lose control, he could feel the tears coming. He just wanted out the door.

“It’s just work, Mike,” Chester tried again as he scooted to the right and then the left, mimicking every move Mike made. “I needed the money,” he blurted out, when he realized that Mike wasn’t going to give up on his pursuit to leave, and they were only a few steps away from the front door now. “I’m not in it because I’m a pervert or whatever else you’re thinking,” he stated, forcing himself not to let the tears stinging his eyes fall. 

Mike shook his head. “Just let me go. I just want to go home.” Without looking at Chester, he scooped his shoes up from beside the door as he said again, “just let me go.” He knew if he looked at his boyfriend he’d give in, and he had to leave. He had to. 

Chester opened his mouth to say something else - anything else - but the sound in Mike’s voice was final, and every bit of the will to fight was now gone. Chester dropped his head as he stepped to the side. “I’m sorry,” he said. “Mike, I’m so sorry.” His lips were trembling. _I love you. I love you. Don’t leave me._ He looked up, hoping to catch some sort of second thought in his boyfriend’s deep eyes, but it wasn’t there. 

With his hand on the door, Mike paused just a second, turning his face toward Chester but keeping his eyes on the ground. “Me, too,” he whispered, and then he was out the door, he heard it click shut behind him and he took a huge gulp of air as he took a couple of steps down the hallway. He wasn’t two doors down when he had to stop, his body slumping to the side of the hall, then sliding down the wall until he was sitting, his knees bent in front of his face. With his bag already on the floor next to him, he dropped his shoes and then dropped his head into his knees, both hands pressed over his mouth as he tried to hold back the sobs. 

_I thought he was the one, I thought we were going to be together. I trusted him, I trusted him. And I love him._ Hot tears slipped down his cheeks and he sat in a ball on the floor of the hallway that he’d come and gone in all week, waiting for Chester’s return. _And for what? I hate everything._

Inside the apartment, Chester sank to the floor. His whole body fell over as he curled up into the fetal position, his arm covering his face. He didn’t hold back the sobs. They ripped down his cheeks in hot streams. He was exhausted, and his heart had just been smashed to a million pieces, and all because of something that was out of his control. 

_He’s not coming back. He’s not coming back. I’m sorry, Mike….I’ll just stay right here. Right here until he comes back. If he comes back._

The floor was hard and unforgiving on his tired body, but somewhere in Chester’s brain, he decided that it was exactly what he deserved.


	12. Picking Up the Pieces

Everything felt numb. Mike didn’t know what time it was, but he knew it was afternoon, somewhere between lunch and dinner, and he was still laying in bed. Memories of last night, of sitting in the hallway of Chester’s apartment building with his life falling apart, were still fresh in his mind. Each breath felt like it was just too much effort, and the sunlight illuminating his room was too bright and too cheerful for the way he was feeling. It was all too much.

The lack of sleep was messing with his head, and he rubbed his face into his pillow, which only made his heart ache again. He missed his pillow at Chester’s. He missed the dim lighting, even at midday. He missed his cozy flannel sheets and the lingering scent of sand and peaches. _Peaches. I’ll never think of peaches without thinking of Chester again. I’ll never be able to eat another peach for the rest of my life._

He’d waited in his car last night until the light in Anna’s bedroom had been off for a while, until he knew she was asleep. The windows were rolled down and the breeze was flowing through the car, but it wasn’t the fresh sea breeze that came through the loft windows at Chester’s place. It was just air - plain, unexciting air - the air that existed before Chester and would be the only air that existed now that Mike had walked away from him. It was over. There was no way they could go on, not now.

When the apartment had been dark long enough, he crept inside as quietly as possible and went straight into his room, and there he’d been ever since. Even though it had never bothered him before, his mattress felt uncomfortable after spending the week at Chester’s. His arms felt emptier than they had while Chester had been away. Everything was wrong.

_Chester._ Mike squeezed his eyes shut again as another wave of despair washed over him. He couldn’t wrap his head around the confession his boyfriend had dumped on him last night, the unbelievable fact that he was working in the porn business. _Maybe I just heard him wrong. Maybe it’s not as bad as it seems._ He sighed and buried his face in his pillow as fresh tears threatened to fall. _No. There’s no way I heard him wrong. He had a file, damn it. A file._

He felt the pillow growing damp as he cried a little bit more, but his body was worn out. There weren’t any tears left to cry now and as he lay there, the sunlight bright through the window and his heart broken, he heard a soft knock at the door.

“Mike?” Anna called as she carefully opened the door just a crack, so as not to intrude on his privacy without permission. “Are you in here?”

Rubbing his hand over his eyes, Mike said weakly, “yeah. What’s up?”

She stepped in, waiting by the door as she looked at her roommate flung onto the bed, still in his clothes. “I heard you come in last night,” she said, twisting her fingers together in front of her. “Is everything okay? I thought you were staying over at Chester’s last night.” 

“I’m not feeling great,” Mike said, not bothering to turn and face her. He wanted her to go away but he also wanted her to stay, to pry a little bit more and let him cry about it all. _But I can’t tell her anyway, so what difference will it make? She’d be totally scandalized. I can’t tell her._

Anna walked over to the bed, her head tilted in concen. “I’m sorry, Mike,” she said before she let out a sigh. “I take it that ruined your night with Chester, huh?” 

His heart pinched when Anna said his boyfriend’s name. It felt like the air was sucked right out of his lungs as he thought about what last night was supposed to have been. It was supposed to be the best night, and it had ended up being the worst. “Yeah,” was all he managed to say, tears threatening his voice and closing off his throat.

“I wouldn’t worry about it,” she tried to encourage. “You can’t help it if you’re sick, and Chester’s proven to be very compassionate and understanding.” She smiled at her roommate, even though his back was to her. “And you two have plenty of time to make up for it.” She waited for a moment, but when Mike didn’t respond, her motherly brain kicked in. “Can I get you anything? Tylenol or some cold medicine? Are you running a fever?” she asked as she went to reach over and try and get a palm on Mike’s forehead. 

Mike felt the cool touch of Anna’s hand on his forehead before he turned his face into the pillow and mumbled, “no.” He shook his head. He just wanted to lay in bed forever. There was no reason to get up, he’d even called out of work for the day and cancelled all his lessons. Facing the world seemed impossible while his heart was shattered.

Anna pulled her hand back, her eyes concentrated. “You don’t feel warm, so that’s good.” She pursed her lips. It wasn’t like Mike to get sick, but she wasn’t going to doubt his story either. For him to not want to even get out of bed, that meant he must really not feel well. “Okay, I’ll let you rest,” she said as she turned to leave. “Just yell if you need anything. I’ll be here for the next few hours before I have a class to go to.” She waited, but when Mike didn’t say anything, she left the room, closing the door behind her. 

Shifting down into the bed a little more, Mike tried to breathe calmly, tried to relax enough to get a little bit of sleep. He’d hadn’t slept since he’d been home, and his body ached right along with his heart. He was working his way through calming mental images, trying to push thoughts of Chester away, when he felt his phone vibrate on the bed. He knew without even picking it up that it was Chester, and that was all it took for his heart to beat furiously again. 

**2:13 pm** _You’re probably not reading this, just like all the other texts, but I have to send it anyway. Mike, I don’t know how else to say I’m sorry. Just let me explain. I never meant to hurt you. I know I did, but I didn’t mean to._

Mike read the text with one eye open, the side of his face still stuffed into the pillow. _But you did,_ he thought, his stomach hurting again. _What can you say that’s going to make this better? Nothing. There’s nothing you can say._

He dropped the phone back onto the bed and lay there for a few minutes. He wanted to talk to Chester but he knew deep down there wasn’t anything he could say to make things right. _He should have told me sooner. He should have told me before I fell in love with him, when I could still walk away without it hurting so much._

But he hadn’t, and Mike lay in his bed, wishing he could go back and do last night over again. Maybe if he’d gotten that condom to cooperate he wouldn’t be at home right now. Maybe it was his fault. It was like him to over-analyze things, to make a big deal out of something that wasn’t. And even though he knew deep down that his feelings of betrayal were justified, there was a bit of hope that someone else might be able to find a loophole for him that would allow him to go back to Chester. 

Rolling over onto his back, Mike stared up at the ceiling. He needed advice. He needed to know if he’d screwed this thing up, if he was over-reacting. Picking up the phone again, he figured he’d give it a shot. If nothing else, Dave might have some perspective that could help him out. Maybe.

**2:20 pm** _Hey, man, you busy?_

**2:24 pm** _A little, what’s up?_

**2:25 pm** _Just looking for some advice. About Chester._ Mike closed his eyes as he typed Chester’s name and pressed send. There was a longer pause before the phone vibrated again.

**2:30 pm** _What’s wrong with Chester? Did you two have your first fight or something?_

Mike blew out a breath and stared over at the window. _A fight? Not really. Nobody yelled about anything. But he hurt me and I left. Is that a fight?_

**2:32 pm** _I guess so. I mean, you know I don’t really fight. But I’m not really happy with him right now. Just wanted another opinion._

**2:33 pm** _Whatever it is, you know that you’re probably in the right. You always are._

_Well, that’s not helpful. He doesn’t even know what this is about and he’s assuming already that it’s Chester’s fault._

**2:34 pm** _You think just because it’s about Chester that he’s automatically wrong?_

**2:35 pm** _Isn’t that what best friends are for, man? I’ve always got your back, Shinoda._

Mike threw the phone down and turned back over on his side, holding his pillow close. _I should have known he wouldn’t be able to help. There’s no way I can tell him what Chester told me, he already thinks Chester isn’t good enough for me. That’s not exactly an unbiased opinion._ Now he was just frustrated, and a little bit hungry. 

_I’ll just wait for Anna to go out and then I’ll make a sandwich so I don’t have to talk to anyone. Nobody can change things anyway._ He closed his eyes and let his annoyance fade back into longing for what he’d almost had, what he knew he could no longer have with Chester, before he fell into an uneasy sleep.

****

Joe sat at the Seaside Cafe, his Mocha in hand as he sat out on the patio, watching the ocean in the distance. He could smell the salt in the air and hear the crowd down at the beach - a mix of locals and tourists. There was a slight breeze, but the karate instructor welcomed it, even in his shorts and t-shirt. 

He looked over just in time to see Chester coming out on the patio, his arms full. Joe sat up a little straighter in his seat as he sat his coffee cup down on the small round table between him and the empty chair. “Hey,” he said, once his friend was to him. 

“Hey,” Chester greated back, letting his bounty of food spill onto the table - muffins, brownies, and cinnamon rolls, all individually wrapped.

Joe watched as Chester sat down, slowly, his coffee still in hand. “You look like shit,” Joe said, catching the red in Chester’s eyes, and the downturn of his lips. “My first guess is because you’ve been eating too much junk food,” he said, motioning over the small mountain of treats between them, “but something tells me that’s not it.” 

Chester plucked his sunglasses off the the collar of his black and tan t-shirt and slid them on his face. “I was hungry, and there’s, like, no food at my house. I mean, there is, but nothing I don’t have to cook. I’m out of everything...soup, cereals, Poptarts, chips. My cabinets are empty.”

“Sounds like you should just go to the store instead of doing your shopping here,” Joe said as he picked up a chocolate chip muffin. “Mind if I have this one?” 

Chester looked his way, and nodded. “Go ahead. And I can’t handle the fuckin’ grocery store right now.” 

Joe already had his muffin unwrapped as he shifted in his seat. “I take it that’s what you wanted to talk about?” 

Chester let out a sigh, his shoulders slumping as he stared at the dark wooden planks that made up the floor of the patio space. There were a dozen or so other tables out here, and about half of them were occupied, which meant he and Joe had a reasonable amount of privacy. “Mike and I aren’t getting along at the moment,” he admitted, not looking up. “It’s my fault. He won’t answer my texts and I just needed to talk to someone.” 

Joe’s chewing action shifted into slow motion as he studied the defeated look on Chester’s face. “Okay,” he said, swallowing down his bite of muffin. “I’m sorry to hear that. You two seemed to get along pretty well. At least from what you both have told me. What, ah, what happened?” 

Chester turned in his seat to face his friend properly, his elbows on the table as he pulled his sunglasses off and wiped his eyes. “If I tell you something, do you...I mean, there’s something I haven’t told you about me, and you kinda gotta know it to understand everything.”

Joe could hear the seriousness in his friend’s voice, and he nodded. “I’m listening.” 

Chester looked up, encouraged by the sympathetic expression in Joe’s wide, dark eyes. He cleared his throat and decided just to say it. “The short version is, is that I work in gay porn,” he said quickly, just trying to get it out. “And I didn’t tell Mike till last night, not really on purpose, but I never thought he’d be more than a casual friend and then he wasn’t and now he’s more and so I told him.” He stopped, his lips trembling as he cast his eyes down to the table. “And he’s pissed at me,” he added. Just to clarify. 

Joe’s jaw was hanging open as his brain fought to make sense of the last few seconds of his life. He’d known Chester Bennington for some years, and the idea that he wasn’t what he’d always announced himself to be was more than shocking. Joe shook his head. “Sorry, Chester, but did you just say you work in gay porn?” 

Chester felt his stomach turn. _That’s it. He’s going to get up and walk away from me, too. Dammit._ He nodded, slowly, his eyes ducked to stare at the table. “Yeah. Have been for the last two years. I got into it to pay some bills, my mom… you know,” he said as he looked up and saw Joe nod in recognition. The karate instructor wasn’t completely in the dark about Chester’s life situation, which was helpful as Chester swallowed hard and went on. “I just told Mike about it last night.” 

Joe sat forward, his head swimming as he tried to comprehend this new bit of information. There were a million and one questions he wanted to ask, a million thoughts he wanted to say about all of this, but as he watched Chester wipe his eyes and sniffle, he decided to let that go for now. That was a conversation for another day. He took a sip of his coffee and said, “Chester, you’ve been dating him for months now. Don’t you think you should have told him earlier?” 

“I tried, a few times,” he answered, looking off toward the ocean and the white frothy waves as they slid back and forth, on and off the beach. “The point is, is that now he’s not talking to me, and I guess I just, I’m not sure what to do.” He paused, his lips rubbing against his piercing. “I’m...I’m in love with him,” he admitted softly, looking back at his friend. “And this hurts like hell.” 

“Love? Oh, man,” Joe breathed, sitting back in his chair. He’d never known Chester to fall for anyone, and maybe now he knew a little bit of the reason why. “Did you tell him that?” 

Chester shook his head. “I wanted to, but after telling him I’m in porn, it seemed like it would make it worse.” 

“Yeah, that’s a tough pill to swallow,” Joe said, wrapping his muffin back up. He’d save the rest of it for later. He set it aside so he could put his elbows on the table, mimicking Chester’s position. “Mike’s pretty clean cut. He’s ah, he’s on the innocent side of the scale, which I’m sure you’ve figured out.” 

“I know,” Chester whispered. “I love that about him.” 

“Did he say anything when you told him?”

Chester shrugged, his hands wrapped around his warm coffee cup. “Not really. He stormed out. He didn’t want to listen, and I don’t blame him. He was probably pretty shocked.” 

Joe let out a sigh. He could already picture his blue-haired friend in his mind, and how upset he must be right now. “I’m sure that’s the understatement of the year,” he mumbled. 

Chester looked up, his mouth drooping. “Yeah. So, like, how do I fix it?” he asked. He knew Joe didn’t have a magic wand or even any dating tricks he could offer that would be helpful, but he was hoping to at least hear that all was not ruined. A sliver of something he could hold onto. 

“I don’t know, pal,” Joe said, scratching the side of his face for a moment. “That’s a tough one. Maybe give him a few days to cool down and process things? Maybe he’ll listen then. Or, why don’t you just quit? I know Mike. You offering to quit would probably be the only way he’d reconsider things.” 

Chester dropped his head. “I can’t quit,” he mumbled. “Not any time soon.” 

Joe let out a long, hard sigh. “It’s a pickle then, Chester. I’ve never known Mike to be much into porn. And I don’t -” 

“I don’t need him to be into it,” Chester interrupted quickly. “I’m not asking him to watch it or do it or anything like that. I would never...I just want him to realize that it’s work. I’m not there for fun. I’m there to make money to pay bills. It doesn’t mean anything to me other than a paycheck,” he stated, his finger pounding into the table for a second. “That’s all I need him to realize.” 

Joe offered him a soft smile, but it faded quickly. “That’s going to be a lot harder than it sounds. Mike’s a romantic. Sex equals love in his book, and I don’t think you’ll be able to change that.” 

Chester leaned forward, his head going into his hands, his fingers tangled in his unstyled mohawk. “I know,” he admitted. “I fuckin’ know it.” 

****

From inside the fog of a strained sleep, Mike could hear his phone vibrate on the bed next to him. He was going to ignore what was probably another text message from Chester, but it kept vibrating, so he stuck his hand out and felt around until he found it. Grabbing it, he brought it close to his face and looked at the screen with one eye.

_Joe. Why is he calling me?_

The thought to just ignore him too crossed Mike’s mind, but he always felt guilty if he let a call ring through when he was capable of answering it. With a sigh, he slid the bar across the screen to answer the call.

“Hello?”

“Hey, Mike, it’s Joe.” 

“Yeah,” Mike rolled his eyes. He wondered why everyone always introduced themselves this way when they knew their number was in the other person’s phone and their name would pop up when they called. “What’s up, man?” 

“Oh, not much. I was actually just calling to see how you’re doing. If, uh, you’re doing okay? I saw Chester earlier.” 

The brief escape he’d had from the pain while he was asleep was over the moment Joe uttered Chester’s name. “Ches? You saw him?” _I can’t even get out of bed and he’s been out in the world?_

“I did. He wanted to talk so we met for coffee a little while ago. He told me what happened.” 

Mike struggled to sit up, his head fuzzy. The room was darker than it had been earlier and he was a little disoriented. “What happened? With us? What do you mean?” Clearly Chester had been keeping his career a secret, so it didn’t make any sense to Mike that he’d just go off and tell Joe so quickly. 

“Yeah,” Joe answered with a long sigh. “He’s a mess, Mike. He just wanted to talk to someone. He wasn’t trying to talk behind your back or anything. He, uh, he told me about the fight you guys had, and I figured if he looks as rough as all that, you might be in even worse shape.” 

“Oh.” Mike didn’t know what to say. He wanted desperately to talk to someone, but what kind of response did he really think he’d get from trying to explain, ‘hey, I broke up with my boyfriend because he’s a porn star.’ “Yeah, today has really sucked,” he settled on as he flopped back down on the bed, feeling his throat constricting again.

“Chester said as much,” Joe confirmed before he waited to see if Mike would say more, but when the line stayed silent, he went on. “Anyway, I just wanted to call and check in, make sure you’re doing okay. Let you know if you want to talk, I’m here. I know it was probably a shock to hear him tell you everything, but...he’s a good guy, Mike. Despite the circumstances.” 

A few more seconds ticked by and then Mike asked in a rush, “Joe? Can I ask you something?”

“Sure. Ask away.” 

“Would you… if someone told you what Chester told me last night,” Mike couldn’t bring himself to say the words, “would you have heard them out? Did I do the wrong thing by leaving?”

Joe took a deep breath. He could hear the desperation in his friend’s voice, and as Chester’s sad face from earlier popped into his mind he said, “I think if you love someone, then they’re always worth the time to hear them out. Nothing’s worse than going through life wondering what could have been.” 

Mike closed his eyes and nodded, a picture in his mind of Chester’s smile, and he knew, as soon as Joe said ‘love’, that he owed Chester at least the ability to explain himself. It didn’t mean things were going to be okay, but maybe, just maybe he could listen, and maybe he could get Chester to see his side of things. _Maybe I can get him to just quit._ All of a sudden, Mike felt like he had a plan. “Joe, thanks for calling,” he said hurriedly. “I gotta go, man, thanks.” 

“Anytime, Mike. I’ll talk with ya’ later.” 

****

It was already dark by the time Mike worked up enough nerve to go back to Chester’s loft. After he’d hung up with Joe, he showered last night’s disappointment off, slid into his favorite flannel and ripped jeans, and made a quick sandwich. Anna was gone and he was grateful as he stood in the kitchen, stuffing the sandwich in his mouth and wondering what he was even going to say. He thought inspiration might come as he drove over to Chester’s place, but nothing came. His mind was totally blank as he sat in the car and stared at the sleek apartment building he’d come to think of as home. Chester was in there. He needed to talk to him, and he didn’t want to leave it until later. Mike needed to know if it was really, truly over, or if he stood any sort of chance at getting Chester out of the business. _Maybe if he knows I love him, if I tell him that I love him, he’ll choose me._

He wiped his palms on his jeans and got out of the car. He hadn’t bothered to fix his hair, and the ocean breeze was blowing through the blue strands as he made his way inside. It was a long walk down the hallway, past all of the welcoming doormats, until he got to number 602.

Mike looked down at his keyring, at the spare key he hadn’t given back yet, and tears pricked in his eyes again. _I don’t want to give this back. I don’t want this to be the end. Please, please don’t let this be the end._ With a deep breath, he knocked on the door. 

From inside the apartment, Chester sat at his kitchen table, his head resting on his arms. He heard the knock on the door, and for a brief moment he thought about getting up to answer it. _Fuck it._ He raised his head long enough to wipe his eyes and yell, “Come in!” before he hid his face back in his arms. _Whoever it is can fuck off if they want a proper greeting._

Mike shook his head, his eyebrows knitting together in concern. Chester never left the door unlocked. Why in the world was his door unlocked this late at night? He tried the door knob and when the door opened to the inside of the apartment, Mike stepped in and his heart sank as his eyes zeroed in on Chester, slumped over the table. He stood there for a minute, wondering what to do, or what to say, but his feet felt frozen to the floor. “Ches?” he called timidly, afraid to startle him.

The sound of Mike’s voice pulled Chester’s head up. He blinked for a second, cursing himself for seeing things, but when he blinked again, his boyfriend was still there. “Mike?” He croaked, before he cleared his throat and sat up in his seat. “Mike?” He stood up, but didn’t make it any further when he realized that the other man wasn’t coming to him. He was still by the door, his keys in his hands. _Why isn’t he coming over here? Can I go to him?_ Chester wasn’t sure, and he started to tug at his shirt tail and the back of his flat mohawk as he waited for something to happen. 

There was a lot of space between them, as Mike stood there staring at Chester, looking at his wrinkled clothes and unfixed hair, and he knew in that moment that his boyfriend had really taken it hard when he’d left the night before. Mike took a couple of steps forward, running his fingers through his windblown hair before he said, “I’m sorry. I’m sorry I left last night, and I’m sorry I haven’t answered your texts. I don’t really know what to say, Ches, but maybe I can just hear what you have to say. If you still want to tell me.” He still hung back, waiting to see if Chester was going to make any move toward him, or ask him to sit down, or throw him out. 

Chester’s heart instantly lifted as he heard Mike apologize, and offer to listen to the reasons why. It was all Chester had wanted, just an opportunity to explain, and then if Mike still wanted to break things off, then he’d have to accept that. 

He let out a long breath and nodded his head. He sidestepped his chair and walked around the edge of the table. “I don’t blame you for leaving last night, I really don’t. I’m an asshole for not telling you sooner. I just...you want to come sit down?” he offered, gesturing to the kitchen table and chairs. “Or we can go sit on the couch, I, I’m just glad you’re here. We can sit anywhere you want,” Chester rambled. “We can go upstairs and sit on the bed, or, I mean, wherever is fine.” He could feel his heart pounding. He never rambled, and he wasn’t sure how to handle it. 

Mike walked over to the table and stopped in front of Chester, an arms length of space between them. “Here’s fine,” he said, dropping his eyes to the table. Up close he could tell Chester had been crying, and it was almost too much for Mike to handle already. This was going to be hard, maybe even harder than leaving last night. “I’m going to get a glass of water, though, first, do you want one too?” he asked.

Chester’s lips were trembling as he nodded. Water would be good, and he felt paralyzed as he stood and watched his boyfriend go into the kitchen and take down two cups, just like everything was fine and they were about to sit down and discuss the weather or plans for the weekend. “Thank you,” Chester said, as he stood a little unsteady on his feet. He wiped his eyes and ordered himself to pull it all together. This was the moment he’d been waiting for, and he hated that he was already falling apart before anything had even happened. He took a few deep breaths, and sat down, ready to talk. Ready to explain. 

With the water in both glasses and nothing else to do to put off having this conversation, Mike set one down in front of Chester and then took a seat across from him, the same place he always sat when they shared meals. He blew out a deep breath and looked down at his hands. “Okay. Okay, Ches, I’m ready to listen.”

Chester wrang his hands together on the tabletop as he thought over everything he’d say, but the best place seemed to be at the beginning. “Remember when I told you my dad passed away a few years ago?” 

Mike thought back. It was late and he hadn’t had much sleep, but something about that sounded familiar. “Yeah?”

“Well, he didn’t just pass away,” Chester said with a swallow as he watched Mike not watching him. “He killed himself.” 

This was not the conversation Mike was expecting to have. He didn’t know exactly what he’d been expecting, but this wasn’t it, and in light of the recent events with his student, Drew, this admission hit a raw, painful place inside him. Mike’s head snapped up and he looked at Chester. “Oh… God, Chester, I’m sorry. That’s… so… awful.” Without even thinking about it he snaked his hand out and took one of Chester’s, squeezing it tightly. 

Chester’s eyes landed right on their joined hands, his spirits lifting a little at Mike’s welcomed touch. “It was awful,” he said as he took a moment before he went on. “I don’t tell people about it. There’s so much stigma around that kind of thing, well, as you know. And I… well, anyway, the point is that because he died by suicide, it voided his life insurance. My mom, she was left with everything on her. The mortgage and all the bills and _debt_ ,” he said with a snarl. “We found out my dad had a gambling problem. He owed people money on top of everything else we already knew about. I turned eighteen a few months later, and that’s when I met Mark.” 

Mike nodded, squeezing Chester’s hand again. “I can’t even imagine what that was like, finding that out after-” He stopped as he realized he’d definitely experienced a bit of shocking news in the last twenty-four hours. “So… you met Mark. And then what? You just… started?” Mike’s voice trailed off. He wasn’t sure what to say. After all, he was only supposed to be listening right now. 

“No, not like that,” Chester said, his thumb lightly petting over the back of Mike’s hand as he focused on the movement. “I don’t remember how we started talking, but I told him everything that was going on, and he told me about a business he owned. He wasn’t sneaky about it, really. He told me up front that YRS was gay porn. But, he offered me a chunk of money to be in one of his movies. I didn’t have to do anything. My job in the movie was to sit in a chair and pretend to film the other two guys. I even got to wear boxer shorts while I did it.” He paused for a minute, thinking back to that very first movie, where it had all started. “It was easy and all I did was sit in a chair holding a fake camera and make kissy faces now and again. We needed the money and it made sense to do it. That was my first time at YRS.” 

He looked up, hoping to get a read on Mike’s face, but couldn’t. “So then that movie did well, and he told me that he got good feedback about me. For my character...Charlie Bang. That’s me, Mike. That’s my name in the movies. We all have one. It’s part of keeping work and your personal life separate,” he said, letting his eyes fall back to the table. 

“Separate?” Mike looked like the word tasted bad. “How can a name help you keep work and your personal life separate? It’s _you,_ Chester, you’re the one… um…” Mike faltered a bit, knowing his tone was judgemental, and he was terrified that he was screwing everything up again. He took another deep breath and tried again. “I mean, I guess I just don’t understand what you mean by keeping it separate. It doesn’t work that way in my head. Sex is… well, to me, in my head, it’s not for cameras, Chester.”

It was starting to feel suffocating in the loft, as Chester pulled at the front of his t-shirt. He couldn’t bring himself to look up at Mike’s eyes - those beautifully deep eyes he was in love with. “I know you don’t understand,” he whispered. “And I’m sorry. But even though there’s sex involved, it’s not like the sex we have,” he said, finally looking up, and the moment he did he felt his face burn, Mike’s stare piercing him. “I mean, not like the sex we will have. I hope,” he added. “It’s work, Mike. There’s lights and cameras and people everywhere while we’re filming. There’s lines to remember and you have to memorize the order things go in, and where you’re supposed to stand. It’s the total opposite of sexy anything.” He stopped for a minute, his eyes going up to the ceiling as he bit his teeth over his lip ring in thought. “It’s like actors taking on different roles in movies, only at YRS you only get one character. I’m always Charlie Bang, no matter what movie I’m in.”

Chester took a deep breath, letting his mind regroup for a second. “Anyway, so Mark asked me to do another film after the first one did well. He offered me a little more money, and in return I had to participate. I didn’t have to actually have sex with anyone, I just had to be the hype man for the other guys in the scene. Touching and kissing them while they did things, and it doesn’t matter,” he insisted as he looked back at his boyfriend. “It was still easy money and I took it. It was four times what I’d make at some minimum wage job, which is all I was qualified for, and that wasn’t going to help my mom. That wasn’t going to help anyone.” He sniffed for a minute before he added, “After that, Mark asked me to sign a contract with YRS, and I did it.” 

“A contract?” Mike sat back, but he didn’t let go of Chester’s hand. He was still trying desperately to understand, to make sense of what he was hearing. It just didn’t work in his head, the idea of sex not being meaningful, and now there were contracts involved? “What kind of contract? You mean, you can’t just leave when you want to, that kind of contract?” There was no controlling his voice then, it had shot up an octave even as he tried to stay calm. 

Chester nodded. “We’re all under contract at YRS. We can’t work for anyone else while we’re with them...it makes us exclusive, and Mark says that’s the best way to build a following. People learn who we are and they come to the website and watch the movies just to see their favorite YRS actors. My contract has another two years on it. I… I can’t just quit,” he admitted, his voice shaking. “Mark’s very clear when you sign that there’s no breaking contracts or his lawyer will have you for lunch. I’ve heard stories. Plus, I’m still paying off my mom’s bills… my dad’s debt.” 

Mike looked around at the fancy loft. He thought about Chester’s expensive car in the parking lot, and he narrowed his eyes as he looked at his boyfriend. “If you’re so worried about the money part of it, why are you spending so much on this place? And your car? Chester, you can quit. You and I, we could find some place together, some place cheaper.” He sat up, his mind ticking through possibilities. “My car is older but it’s paid off, we’d have that one. We can live somewhere closer to my work, if we could afford it, and I could walk. Or you could walk. Ches,” he said, shaking his boyfriend’s hand, “it doesn’t have to be like this. You can walk away, there’s no way that contract could be that bad.”

Chester tilted his head, his mind lost in the light sparkling in Mike’s eyes. “That sounds wonderful,” he whispered, before he shut his eyes. “The loft isn’t mine, Mike. I’m not paying anything to live here. It’s Mark’s. He owns it, but rents it out because he lives at the YRS house where we shoot everything. This place,” he said as he opened his eyes and looked around at the space he’d grown so used to, “is a perk. It’s something he offered me when I wanted to move out of mom’s house. The car is my own fault, and I’m stupid for getting it, but after giving almost everything I make over to bills for the last two years, I just let go one day. Ryan talked me into it, but I take full blame. If it was a matter of just giving up my car, I would. But you and me scraping to get by somewhere isn’t going to help my mom. She doesn’t know what I do, and I’m never going to tell her. I just have to keep going till I can get her in the clear, and she can be okay financially, which should just about match up when my contract is done.” Chester stopped for a moment. He squeezed Mike’s hand. “It’s just work. There’s a difference between sex and love, and all those guys at YRS, they’re in the sex category. It’s not the same as making love to someone. The two are worlds apart,” he said, hoping that something, somewhere would make this all be okay for his boyfriend. 

“Ches… I don’t really understand, you’re right… I mean, I understand the why behind what you’re doing, but I don’t get how you can just flip a switch and sex means nothing. There’s a _reason_ I haven’t had sex with anyone before.” He looked down at their linked hands, and he thought about all the places Chester’s hands had been on him that he’d never allowed anyone else’s hands to go before. He thought about the places his lips had been, he thought about every shared moment in the bed upstairs, and he could physically feel his heart aching. “To me, it’s all about love, Ches. The whole idea of giving yourself completely to someone, trusting someone that much, it’s something you give in love, not something you just go through the motions of for someone else’s gain.” 

He looked up, catching Chester’s eyes that were watching him intently, and Mike felt the breath knocked out of his lungs. This was the moment, he had to tell him, and he had to know if he felt the same way. Because if they were in love, there was no way Chester could go back to work. He _had_ to choose Mike, he had to. But when Mike opened his mouth, “I love you” didn’t come out. Instead, he asked, “do you swear, Ches? Can you look at me and swear to me that it’s not about love for you? These guys at work, do you love any of them?”

Chester looked right into his boyfriend’s eyes, their hands still linked across the table. “I swear, Mike, I’m not in love with any of them. I care about them,” he admitted. “Some more than others, but that’s just because I’m around them so much; we’re friends. But love doesn’t have anything to do with it.” 

Mike pressed his lips together, nodding his head slowly before he closed his eyes. _I don’t know if this is going to work. I don’t know if I want to know the answer… I don’t know if I should ask him…_ “Do you love me?” he blurted out, his voice trembling slightly.

Chester reached across the table, cupping his other hand over Mike’s. “God, yes,” he said. “Mike, if I never saw any of those guys at YRS again, it wouldn’t phase me a bit. But you, I was away from you for a week and I felt like I was dying inside. Not to mention the last twenty-four hours. I love you, and I hope you love me back.” 

The little bit of hope Mike was still holding on to, that spark that was trying to break into a raging fire, flared inside his heart, and he nodded, his voice breaking as he said, “I do, Ches, I love you so much. And I want us to be together, I do! But how are we going to be able to do this? I’m a teacher, Chester, a _teacher._ People trust their kids with me. What would they think if they knew I was dating someone who worked in… the adult film industry?” Mike was trying to choose his words carefully. “I don’t get it, the sex not love part of it, but that’s only part of the problem. Well, a big part of the problem, and I want to trust you. I just… I don’t know.” He brought both of Chester’s hands up and dropped his face into them wearily. “If you love me Chester, please think about leaving.”

It was the worst possible scenario. Love. They had just declared their love for the first time, and instead of being thrilled, instead of melting into the intimacy Mike’s romantic imagination had created around the idea of love and sex, they were sitting here discussing the reasons they couldn’t be together. _This isn’t how it was supposed to happen. I wasn’t supposed to fall in love with someone I couldn’t have. I’ve been so careful…_

“I do love you,” Chester stated, and he made sure that Mike was looking him in the eyes when he said it. “You can trust me, Mike. And I want to make sure all the cards are on the table all the time. Maybe that will help you feel better about it… so if there’s ever anything you want to know or, have questions, I’ll answer them. I’m not hiding anything. Not anymore. I can’t quit,” he said, taking his hands back and dropping them into his lap. “But… can we give it a try this way? If everything is transparent, then there’s nothing to worry about, right? I mean, between us. You being a teacher,” he said, scratching the side of his head, “well, what the hell does it matter what I do? And even if it does, it’s not something I go around telling people.” 

Mike frowned as he answered Chester’s question. “It matters to me. It’s… well, it’s just that some people frown upon the industry, surely you know that. And anything that has to do with sex and minors in an capacity, even it it’s obliquely related, isn’t a good thing. Does that make any sense to you?” _It’s a morality issue, Ches. What’s moral and upstanding and right… it’s all the opposite of what I always imagined for myself. But I can’t leave. I don’t want to leave. I want you to quit. I’m going to find a way to get you to quit. I have to._

Chester picked up his glass of water for the first time. It wasn’t quite ice water anymore, but it was still cold. He took a long drink, and he longed for something stronger as he sat it down. “Yeah, I get it,” he said, with an acknowledging nod. “So, that’s it then? You can’t be with me because of what other people might say...I get it.” 

“That’s not what I said. I’m just trying to figure this all out. It’s a lot to process. Even if all that had happened tonight is we said ‘I love you’ for the first time, it would have been a lot to take in.” He ventured a small smile in Chester’s direction. “I’ve been wanting to tell you, you know. Almost every time we talked last week, I almost told you I loved you. You’ve just got to give me some time, I just need some time.” _Time to figure out how to get you to leave this life behind. Anything we build together will be better than this. Even if we’re sleeping together in my tiny room with Anna as a roommate, it will be fine because we’ll be together._

Chester’s downfallen expression lifted a little as he listened. “Really? I… I didn’t want to say it,” he said, before he shook his head and tried again. “I mean, I did, but it’s been so hard keeping all this from you,” he admitted, his hand going to his chest. “It’s been awful. And the closer we got and the more I knew I was in love, the more scared I got that the truth would be the end of us and…” He sucked in the air, and let his eyes fall on Mike’s sweet face. “But we’re here now, and you can have all the time you need.” 

Mike stood up and walked around the table. He reached for Chester’s hand as he did so, pulling the other man out of his seat and into his arms. They stood pressed together for a moment, Mike’s hands tracing soft circles into Chester’s back while he waited, eyes closed, and thought about what would happen next. He wasn’t sure how things were going to end up between them, but he knew it was worth it to try. _All I know is I can’t walk away. There’s no way I can walk away now, I love him too much._

He turned his head, letting his lips brush softly over Chester’s closely shaved hair before he whispered in his ear, “I love you, Chester.” It felt good to finally say it out loud, to acknowledge how he’d been feeling for some time now, and he felt Chester squeeze him back before he leaned back just enough to find Chester’s lips and bring them together in a soft kiss. It was a gentle, undemanding, unassuming kiss, and Mike felt his insides warming just from having Chester in his arms again.

Chester’s hands were on Mike’s hips, and as he felt Mike’s tongue tease his lips, Chester felt excitement swelling. He dropped both hands to Mike’s ass, squeezing him as he pulled them a little closer. He bent his head back, breaking their kiss, leaving them both panting for a moment. “So was that enough time to think things over?” Chester asked, a wyly grin crossing his face. 

“Mmmm, I don’t know,” Mike teased, his heart lifting a bit. “I might need you to convince me a little bit more.” He slid a hand around the back of Chester’s neck and pulled them back together, savoring the way Chester’s hands grabbed at him and the way he was returning the kiss passionately. That flame that simmered between them, always just underneath everything, was growing and Mike didn’t want to say no. He didn’t want to think about the impossibility of it all, he didn’t want to think about debt and contracts and porn, he just wanted to lose himself in the heat and desire he’d been feeling for weeks. Weeks of wanting more, of wanting to tell Chester he loved him, of wanting to go all the way… it all hit Mike full force. _He loves me. That’s all that matters. He loves me, and it’s going to be okay. It has to be, because we’re in love._ Mike’s tongue toyed with the lip ring again before he kissed down the side of Chester’s neck. “My brain is telling me I’m an idiot, to take his slow, but I still want you so much, that hasn’t changed, not even a little,” he whispered as Chester dropped his head to the side and let Mike run kisses back up his neck and over to his ear.

“Never overthink anything, Sexy Boy,” Chester husked, as he maneuvered Mike back a step or two, and with his hands still on Mike’s ass, he hoisted him up onto the table. He leaned forward, pressing his boyfriend back a little as he took his turn now, kissing Mike’s jawline, and down to his earlobe. He let his tongue come out, lapping at it, as he leaned in even more. “I’m all yours, Mike,” he whispered. “My love is just for you.” 

Chester got his knee up on the table, and a second later, he had Mike on his back, as he crawled on top of him. One of the glasses of water tipped over, and for a second there was an amused chuckle between them before Chester went back to his objective. He slowly licked his way up Mike’s neck, his warm tongue latching onto his boyfriend’s skin. He pressed his hips down, letting their hidden cocks touch in needed pressure. He heard Mike moan, and then Chester felt his boyfriend’s hands creep up his back, under his shirt. 

“Ches, wait,” Mike said, pulling his fingers across the warm skin right above Chester’s waistband. “I think we can do better than the kitchen table. I missed your bed last night,” he admitted. “Let’s take this up there where it’s softer… and drier.” His body was on fire, everything else from the past twenty-four hours forgotten. 

Chester was breathing hard, and his mind was a little rushed with the mass amount of emotions and hormones racing through him, but he managed to nod. “Okay. And it’s _our_ bed,” he corrected, with a smile. “I couldn’t even sleep up there last night without you.” He bent down to let his lips touch Mike’s one last time - a wet, warm embrace - before he carefully eased himself off the table. He stood for a moment, gathering himself before he offered a hand to help Mike from his somewhat awkward position. 

Mike placed his hand in Chester’s, his pulse coming fast and hard as he allowed himself to be pulled back up from the table. “Our bed, Ches, you’re right. Take me up to our bed.”


	13. The First Time

Chester led the way up the stairs, Mike’s hand nestled in his own. Already he could feel his stomach jumping with a mix of relief and excitement. There were no more secrets. Everything was out in the open, and Mike had come back to him. They were staying together, they were going to work things out, and now they were on their way to their bed to make love for the first time. 

Chester stepped into the lofted bedroom, and immediately he turned around, pulling Mike into his arms. He connected their lips quickly, hungrily as he tasted every bit of Mike’s mouth with his tongue. He heard himself moan. He felt the ache in his pants as his erection was already present and demanding to come out. Chester’s mind was in the fog of hormones and need, as he grabbed Mike’s neck, letting his teeth hang on a little tighter than he normally would. 

Mike felt the pull of Chester’s teeth on his skin and his dick leapt in response. This was it. No going back now, his hands flat on Chester’s back, pulling him in closer, feeling every inch of his hard body pressed against him. He slid one hand up and into the very top of Chester’s hair, holding his lips and teeth in place as he leaned his head back and sighed. Every part of his body wanted to be naked, every last shred of rational thought about the evening out the window as he whimpered, “you feel so good, Ches.”

Chester pulled back, releasing Mike’s neck, his eyes going to the red spot he’d left - it would quickly bruise and turn into a hickey, and a grin washed over Chester’s face. He leaned in and licked the spot before he kissed it, and then up under Mike’s jawline, and back to his ear. “I’ve missed you so much,” he mumbled, his hands on Mike’s hips. He had his eyes closed, his fingertips snaking up under his boyfriend’s double layer of shirts until he felt his skin, and everything inside of him shivered with lust. He could already see forward, ripping Mike’s shirts off - even the undershirt! - and then laying him down on the bed to get his jeans off next. 

When Chester pulled away, and Mike felt his hands playing across his skin, his desire to have his boyfriend shirtless was unstoppable. He reached for the hem of the black and tan t-shirt, ready to pull it off Chester’s body, when Chester slid his hands around between their bodies and placed them on Mike’s. With a growl of impatience, Mike asked, “what?” 

Chester’s mouth was hanging open as he breathed, his good sense of what was about to happen smacking him hard. “Don’t hate me,” he said, holding Mike’s hands. “But I stink. I haven’t showered. I’m still in the clothes I had on last night.” He paused for a moment. “I need to go shower quick - and I mean _quick_ ,” he emphasized when he saw Mike’s expression. “Trust me, the five minutes of waiting will be worth it. You don’t want to smell me,” he said, before he leaned in and kissed Mike’s cheek. 

A string of curse words was on the tip of Mike’s tongue when Chester backed away, but he dutifully dropped his hands, though he couldn’t help but stick his bottom lip out in a stubborn pout. “You better not keep me waiting too long. I might start without you,” he said, his voice low and needy, even to his own ears. “This better not be one of your twenty minute long spa retreats.” He looked at Chester and then deliberately moved his hand to press on his erection, keeping his eyes on his boyfriend. “I mean it. Hurry up.”

Chester’s eyebrow lifted. He’d never heard Mike sound like that. So demanding. “I’m going,” Chester said. “You stay here and get naked,” he suggested. “And I’m not even taking any clothes with me. Look, I’m going down the stairs with nothing!” he shouted from half down the staircase. “Be naked when I get back!” he hollered from downstairs, before he bolted to the bathroom, ready to blitz through the fastest shower of his life. He’d use just enough water and soap to get clean, and then he’d back upstairs in a flash. 

Mike watched Chester disappear and he bit his lip in frustration. He was tired of the stopping, the roadblocks, and he needed Chester to hurry before his self-doubt started creeping back in and threw his anxiety into the mix. He heard the shower already started downstairs as he moved to unbutton the cuffs of his worn out flannel shirt. The frayed edges made him smile briefly; he hadn’t given any consideration to what he was wearing when he’d gotten dressed that evening, but Chester didn’t care. _He’s just happy I’m back. That’s how it’s supposed to be. He said he loves me. That means flannel shirts and all._

Even though his fingers were shaking a little, he got the buttons undone and he dropped his shirt on the floor, then reconsidered and picked it up, folding it carefully and setting it on top of the dresser. Jeans were next, folded and slid underneath his shirt, and then Mike stood there, considering Chester’s instructions. _Naked. Completely naked when he comes back._ He brushed his hand over his undershirt and swallowed. _He loves me, and we’re going to finally do this, and it’s not just sex, not when he loves me too._ He closed his eyes and took his white t-shirt off, and before he could freak out, slid his boxer briefs off and added both to his pile of clothes. Now there was nothing left to do but wait. 

Chester jumped out of the shower, almost slipping as his wet feet hit the slick floor. _Wow, that could have been bad,_ he warned himself as he slowed down. He didn’t want to end up in the E.R. for stitches. Not tonight. Nothing was going to stop them this time, he decided as he quickly toweled off. He looked up, his eyes trying to see through the ceiling and into his bedroom where he knew Mike was waiting. _Naked and ready._ On instinct his hand dropped and felt over his own limp cock, tugging at it here and applying pressure there, bringing it quickly to life as he ran his comb through his damp mohawk. He grabbed his toothbrush and after barely getting the minty toothpaste on it, he ran it over his teeth twice, before he decided that was enough. 

Everything else was a blur as he rinsed and spit and wiped his mouth. He turned off the bathroom light, and headed back to the stairs - remembering not to run with his feet still being a little wet. “Mike, I’m coming!” he hollered as he took the stairs two at a time. His heart was already in fifth gear as he got the doorway, his trusty left hand stroking himself so he’d be ready. “Hey, Sexy Boy,” he called from the doorway as he stared at Mike, who had laid down on the bed, his full body on display. 

Chester’s eyes started at Mikes’ face, and they rolled down every inch of him, and that was it. He let himself go as he practically flew to the bed. He climbed on, and laid down beside his boyfriend, his hand going to Mike’s exposed stomach, where he drew soft circles with his fingers, his lips right to his boyfriend’s ear, then his face before he joined their lips. 

Desire sparked between them instantly and Mike turned on his side to slide his hand down his boyfriend’s chest as they kissed. Chester’s skin was flushed pink from the shower and he still felt a little damp, but Mike didn’t care. He’d been quick, like he promised, and Mike tilted his chin to let the kiss go wider and deeper, his tongue seeking out the taste of Chester. It was minty toothpaste that greeted him, and Mike couldn’t help but smile, pulling back for a moment and lifting his hand to stroke his thumb over Chester’s lip ring. “You managed to brush your teeth, too?” he barely chuckled with amusement.

“Oh, it was race against the clock,” Chester said through his smile. “Almost face planted on the floor trying to get out as quickly as I could. But I made it.” He shut his eyes, kissing Mike’s cheek for a moment, before he slid his hand down his side, and pushed on his hip, sending Mike onto his back. “Relax,” he said as he sat up. He looked down over Mike’s flat tummy - almost flat tummy - his eyes soaking up and loving the small belly his boyfriend’s healthy appetite had afforded him. He trickled his fingers there, loving how soft his skin was. He smoothed his hand over the area, and then down over Mike’s thigh. 

“You ready?” He asked, and before Mike could answer, he was on his knees, maneuvering around to get between Mike’s legs. His eyes were drunk with lust as he leaned down, lapping his tongue against the free, naked skin of Mike’s cock. The small amount of pre-cum that had been there was now in Chester’s mouth, and he took his time swallowing it. A sigh of relief swept him, as he leaned down and licked him again, before he brought his hand in and took the tip of Mike’s penis between his lips. 

It was the first time Mike had felt Chester’s lips and tongue, his hot mouth, around him condom free, and he gasped, the electricity of it shooting through his body. There weren’t even words in his mind, just sensations floating along behind his closed eyelids. He felt the smoothness of Chester’s lip ring and the bit of extra pressure from the ball on it, and he already wanted more; he _needed_ Chester’s mouth to go deeper as he was spending time teasing the sensitive head of his dick with his tongue. Mike lifted his hand from where he’d been gripping the sheets and slid it over Chester’s damp hair as he breathed out, “fuuuckkk, Ches…” 

It was music to Chester’s ears. He twisted his tongue around Mike’s head one more time before he pulled back, licking his lips, and getting his mouth ready to take more. He pressed his free hand to the inside of one of Mike’s thighs, spreading his legs a little further before he went down. He pulled his boyfriend’s cock into his mouth, letting it slide in, and then out as he sucked. As his let his tongue act as a conduit of pleasure. He felt Mike’s fingers latch harder into his hair, and it was like rocket fuel. 

Chester’s hand squeezed the base of Mike’s dick a little more, as he slipped his mouth up and down, again and again, he’d pull completely away, letting the air take its turn in smacking Mike’s wet, ready member. Chester smiled at his work - at the flushed flesh that was Mike’s dick. At the double drips of pre-cum that were falling from his needy slit. 

He looked up, his eyes searching for Mike’s face. “Ready for something else? Or should I keep going?” 

At first all Mike could do was nod his head, answering yes to both questions. _Keep going and something else. Fuck. Doesn’t matter to me._ He felt Chester’s hand curled around him, he felt the absence of his mouth, and he felt the trembling of his thighs as he opened his eyes and caught Chester’s lust-filled brown eyes. “Yeah,” he rasped out, holding his gaze, “something else.”

“Okay, something else it is,” Chester said, his face consumed with a blissful smile as he leaned down and butterfly kissed the head of Mike’s dick, then both his thighs. “Don’t move,” he said, before he twisted out from between his boyfriend’s legs and headed for the bedside table. He wrestled through the drawer until he found the bottle of lube. 

“You know what,” Chester said thoughtfully, “I changed my mind. You do need to move.” He spun himself back around on the bed, laying down on his side. He sent his fingers to reach across Mike’s stomach and grabbed his hip bone. “Come here,” he murmured. 

Mike turned on his side, lacing his legs through Chester’s for a moment, allowing Chester’s hand to guide their bodies into alignment. He dropped his head forward and kissed Chester’s chin. “Now what?” he whispered, waiting, his cock screaming with impatience at the interruption he’d allowed. 

Chester didn’t say anything. He bucked his hips, letting his erection push up against Mike’s, the pressure feeling heavenly. His boyfriend’s body was warm, and as Chester held onto Mike’s hip for leverage while he continued to rub their aroused parts together, he could tell that Mike was ready. He could hear it in his breathing, in the way he rasped his name, and how his fingernails were currently digging into Chester’s back. “Okay, okay, let’s try a test run,” Chester whispered before he pulled their bodies apart, despite how much that sucked. He could feel his own cock yelling at him, but he also knew something much better was coming. 

He fished for the bottle of lube from behind his back, and smeared the slicky substance all over his fingers. “You okay still?” he asked, his eyes lidded as he let his lips touch Mike’s bare shoulder. 

“Yeah,” Mike breathed, his voice barely above a whisper. He pressed his lips to Chester’s temple and he said, “I love you, Ches... I love you.” He swallowed and closed his eyes. “I’m ready.” 

Chester’s heart pumped a little faster. “I love you, too,” he whispered back, before he gently shoved Mike’s top leg up with his knuckles so he could get his lubed fingers between his legs and to his anal opening. He felt around blindly - first to the soft, plushy flesh of Mike’s butt cheeks, and then to the crack, where he ran his fingers down to find the spot. He kissed his boyfriend’s neck, leaving small, wet marks in his wake. He pressed one finger around the small opening, testing the waters and teasing the ultra sensitive skin that lived there before he pushed a little, sending the very tip of his finger inside. 

Mike caught his breath. This wasn’t new, but it was still _different_ , and he had to remind himself that the more relaxed he was, the easier this would be, that much he’d already learned. He also knew that it wouldn’t take much work for Chester’s fingers to feel _good_ , and he wanted to get to that place. He felt Chester’s gentle kisses on his neck, different from the passionate ones earlier, and he concentrated on the feel of his lips as he murmured, “keep going,” and felt his boyfriend push just a little bit more. After a few seconds he felt his knees begin to shake and he tried to relax, and tried to reassure Chester he was fine. They’d done more, and they’d have to do more, if they were really going to make love tonight.

Chester’s first finger was halfway in, and he carefully pushed it the rest of the way, letting Mike’s insides hug his skin and bone. He moved it around, carefully. A little side to side, but then then it was in and out, never completely allowing his digit freedom. He felt Mike’s body slowly start to relax as he went, as he stretched the area, and prepared it for something more. One step at a time, that’s how it had to be done. It was the only way to keep his boyfriend safe and eager for more this first time. 

Chester threw his leg over Mike’s straggling one, pressing his erection up against his thigh as he continued his finger work, the friction growing. He dared to pry for a second to go in as he nudged it up against Mike’s opening, everything running on Chester’s knowhow as his mind had fallen into a somewhat blank space. He was ready for more. Now. But he didn’t want to rush it. Didn’t want to ruin anything for their first time. He let his head fall forward, kissing every piece of Mike’s skin that he could find as he pressed finger number two inside, spreading the anal cavity a little further. 

It wasn’t sudden, and Mike was expecting it, but he was still a little surprised at the burn he felt, despite how gentle and careful Chester was being. _He’s taking care of me, I know he is… just breathe, Mike, breathe._ His hands were shaking as he brought one up to Chester’s neck, guiding his kisses a little more before coaxing his lips over so he could take them. He needed it, the smooth intimacy of kissing while he felt his body try to fight Chester’s fingers just a bit. Mike stroked his thumb over Chester’s cheek as he sucked on his bottom lip, breathing heavily through his nose, all of his senses consumed with the heat and smell of his boyfriend’s body. They were going slow, and it was good, and Mike could feel every movement Chester made with his fingers inside him. Just thinking about what was coming sent his stomach fluttering with nervous butterflies as it hit him all at once - this was really happening now.

Chester soaked in one more kiss from Mike’s loving lips before he pulled back, and very carefully, he slid his fingers out too. He felt Mike’s body jerk, the moment his anal cavity was emptied. “Want to get on your hands and knees?” he asked, his hot breath rushing from his mouth, and fanning over Mike’s face. Hands and knees wasn’t something they’d done yet, and even though they’d talked about positions before, actually doing it was something else. He let his unlubed fingers stroke over Mike’s naked side as he waited. 

“Is it going to be easier that way?” Mike asked, opening his eyes just a bit. He didn’t want to move, he didn’t want to give up the calming kisses, but he also knew what was coming wasn’t going to be easy. Not that he was looking for it to be easy, but he wanted to do everything right so that he would enjoy it once the first part was over. 

Chester nodded. “Yeah, it will be easier. I’m sure there’s some scientific, whatever reason for it, but yeah, it’s easier. And fun,” he added as he pecked Mike’s lips before he sat up. His hard dick squirmed a bit at the movement, and Chester took a few deep breaths. They were almost there, almost ready to take the plunge, and that meant one more conversation needed to be had first. He watched as Mike slowly sat up, his chest rising and falling quickly as he went to turn around to get into the stated position, but Chester reached for his arm first. “Mike, wait,” he said, “I need to tell you something first. Before...before we really do this.” 

“Wait?” Mike could feel little prickles of anxiety over his skin. “Chester. What is it?” 

“It’s nothing bad,” he answered quickly, seeing that look of panic in his boyfriend’s deep eyes. He reached out and stroked his fingers down Mike’s naked arm. “Just, something we haven’t really talked about, and we need to. So, when it comes to anal sex,” he said slowly, his breathing finally calming down enough to get a good sentence out, “if you don’t use a condom, it’s called going bareback. And, I’ve never done that before.” He shut his eyes and swallowed before he went on. “I’m not saying we have to. If you want me to wear one, I will. But I just wanted you to know that I never have. Not at work and not at any other time. I’ve never trusted anyone enough to do that… but we can, if you want to.” 

Mike felt his mouth drop open as he watched his boyfriend talk. It hadn’t occurred to him that they _wouldn’t_ be using a condom, and the thought had him stumped… and curious. He watched Chester watching him, and he knew he only had seconds to make a decision. A well thought out, rational decision, a safe decision, one that he could live with in the morning. Mike bit down on his bottom lip and he was about to say, “we should use the condom, Ches, you know that,” when he caught yesterday’s file folder in the corner of his eye. _He wanted me to look at that yesterday and I didn’t. But he swore he was clean and he’s got tests to prove it. And this is something he’s never done before. And I’ve never done before. It will be a first, really a first for him, too, and I want that. I want to be a first, like he’s my first. And he’s mine. Mine._

He flashed his eyes back to Chester, who was regarding him with a mixture of hope and fear, and he closed the space between them, scooting forward to rest his forehead against Chester’s. “Okay,” he answered, his voice shaking. “Let’s… let’s go without.” 

Something light and giddy shot through Chester’s entire being. He’d been thinking about asking Mike this ever since he realized he was in love, but he hadn’t been totally sure of what his boyfriend would say. But now, now it was a new bridge they were about to cross, new territory to explore together. “Yes,” Chester said, as he pulled his head back. “I want it to be with you,” he said, running a hand over Mike’s close by leg. “Just you.” 

Chester nudged Mike to move now, and he watched as he got on his hands and knees. Chester maneuvered behind him, taking the bottle of lube with him. He stared down at Mike’s ass for a moment, letting both hands caress the round cheeks, and the thighs they connected to. He took one finger, and teasingly ran it up Mike’s ass crack, and then all the way up onto his back. “How’s that working for you?” he asked, leaning a little to the left to try and get a glimpse of Mike’s face. “I mean, if you’re comfortable I could stay back here all night admiring your ass.” 

“Chesterrr,” Mike called, “stop teasing me.” He shifted, leaning on one arm as the other hand felt for his cock, which was hard and dripping and ready. He slid his hand over the head and hissed, feeling the slipperiness of the precum on his palm, and he wanted to get past the pain he knew was coming to get to the pleasure. “Come on, before I change my mind and just take care of this on my own.”

“Mhm,” Chester smirked, as he lined himself up, his hands on Mike’s hips. He let his hard on rub against Mike’s crack at first, his dripping fluids smearing all over every bit of skin within its range. Chester’s head was already back as he partially humped his boyfriend, not even trying to aim for anything yet. It was a good feeling, and as he got his bearings in line, he looked down, and assessed the situation. He moved his hands, letting each one take an ass cheek and he pulled, spreading them apart to reveal Mike’s opening. Chester licked his lips at the sight of it. His dick was already calling to be allowed in. “Spread your legs a little more,” he instructed, his voice soft and undemanding. 

With both hands back on the bed, Mike wiggled his knees apart a bit more, his stomach clenching with the anxiety of feeling so exposed. “Better?” he asked, dropping his head down to stare at the red and black flannel sheets.

“Yeah,” Chester mumbled as he took his dick in his hand and guided it to Mike’s hole. He rubbed the two together, the sensation of his head feeling the wrinkled skin around his boyfriend’s anal opening was something new, something that sent prickles of pleasures through his cock and into his legs. The instinct to push right in hit him, but he stopped himself. He looked over, catching sight of the bottle of lube. He quickly squeezed a large amount into his palm and lathered himself up, heavy. “If you need me to stop, just tell me,” he said as he stroked his slippery dick. 

Mike closed his eyes, chanting to himself to relax as he felt everything going on behind him, felt the tease of Chester’s cock, felt the coolness of the lube, and heard Chester’s heavy breathing. “Okay. I will, I promise.” He bit down on his lip and waited, feeling Chester’s hand grip his hip just a little bit more firmly as he steadied himself. _Here we go._

Chester held his breath as he pushed. He felt the hot, tight walls of Mike’s body open as he applied pressure. He felt them give way and suck the head of his cock inside, and there Chester stopped, his entire body shooting with spurts of pleasure just from being inside with nothing between him and his boyfriend’s precious body. Chester’s hands were shaking as he waited. He knew he had to hold on and not shove all the way in, even though he really wanted to. 

The teeth holding Mike’s bottom lip sunk down into his flesh just a little more as he felt the pressure of Chester’s push cause his body to give way and welcome him inside. It wasn’t anything like fingers, it was completely different, a different kind of heat, a different kind of firmness, and Mike felt all of the blood in his body ignite under his skin. He felt hot all over, his pulse pounding in his ears as he sucked a quick breath in through his nose. He didn’t have to tell Chester to wait, he’d stopped on his own, and Mike tried to tell his body to relax but he could feel just exactly how tightly he was latched around Chester’s cock. 

A few more breaths in, while Chester’s hand massaged lightly over his hip, and he felt ready to try for more. “Okay, okay,” he said, his voice a little strained. He felt the sweat on his forehead and he wanted to press a hand to his face, but he was afraid on his wobbly knees that he’d lose his balance. 

Chester nodded at Mike’s words. He let his fingers glide over Mike’s hip a second more, and then over the small of his back, lovingly, before he pulled it back to his hip. He let his weight move forward, his shaft making its entrance slowly. Every inch was being swallowed by heat and pressure, and Chester closed his eyes. He savored the feeling until he felt he’d gone as far as he was going to get on this first pass. His heart was beating quickly, his mouth open. He waited for a second, but when Mike didn’t tell him to stop, he took that as the green light that everything was okay. 

He pressed his fingers into Mike’s hips, clutching him a little tighter as he pulled back just an inch or two and then pushed back in. And inch or two out, and then back in. Over and over, his body working up to a steady rhythm of the short movements he would elongate later, but for now, it was doing the last bit of stretching that Mike’s body needed. 

Mike felt each movement, each push, get a little bit easier. The trembling in his arms and legs started to calm a little bit as his body gave way, and it felt less intrusive and more welcome. He held still, letting Chester set the pace, giving it all time to start to feel good. His bottom lip popped free of his teeth as he scrunched his eyes tightly and moaned. It was a cross between pain and pleasure; he wasn’t quite one hundred percent on the side of everything feeling good yet, but he was getting there. Slowly.

He finally gave up on holding himself up on his arms and let his elbows break, slowly lowering himself down to the bed and resting there for a minute, turning his face to tell Chester, “it’s good, I’m good, Ches.”

The change in Mike’s position was like night and day. As soon as his top half dropped down to the mattress, Chester felt a pull - a different angle - on his dick, and something rushed through him. He heard Mike’s voice, registered that it was positive, but he never actually heard what he said. Chester’s ears felt deaf as he pulled further out now, letting the underside of his mushroom head connect with the rounded tight seal of Mike’s opening, and then he slammed back inside. He knew it was a little hard, but they were at that point. They were at the point of getting down to what really felt good. 

He did it again, pulling almost totally out before he sank back in, and each time he felt like he was going in a smidge deeper. His knees pressed hard into the mattress as he swung his body, his practiced movements proving true as he squeezed his eyes shut. “Holy fuuuck,” he moaned, his body going on overdrive, as he leaned forward with his next thrust sending himself deeper than he thought he could go, his ball sack smacking up against Mike’s from between his legs. 

Every stroke felt better until Mike was consumed in the absolute pleasure of it all, and he let himself stop worrying about everything and just feel. Chester picking up the pace and inching his way further inside, the way he was going deeper each time, was starting to pull together a tight ball of pressure in Mike’s lower half. He felt each finger digging into his skin, felt Chester’s hips against his ass as he went deeper, and then he felt something else, something more powerful as his boyfriend thrust in and out of him. The next deep thrust touched a place inside Mike he didn’t really know existed, a place that instantly sent a new kind of energy through his body. It felt like a few more pumps against that spot and he would cum without even touching himself.

“Ches, that’s so good,” he slurred, trying to make his mouth work. His tongue felt heavy and he didn’t even know if Chester could understand what he was saying, but he’d tried. He was close. He could feel it. 

Chester’s needy erection was working away, going deeper with each smash into Mike’s ass, and as he went, he felt something new. Something that didn’t quite register. It was a softer spot inside Mike’s body. A spot that rubbed against the head of Chester’s dick with a sensation like he’d never felt before, and that’s when he heard Mike’s slurred words - _good_ being the only one Chester actually understood, but it was enough to click something in his brain. _His prostate. I’m hitting his prostate!_ It was a gleeful sort of revelation, and Chester knew exactly what to do next. 

Longer. 

Harder.

It was on now. 

He spread Mike’s ass cheeks a little further apart to allow himself the tiniest bit more room, to get just that little bit deeper. He shut his eyes, his mind drifting into a happy space of sexy images - Mike naked in the shower, which was a sight he’d never actually seen before, but he hoped that maybe one day soon he would. Mike sprawled across the bed, his legs wide open and showing off everything he owned. Mike touching himself and calling Chester’s name. Mike with his ass in the air downstairs on the couch. And then up against the windows as they both looked out at the ocean. Mike kissing him with his sexy lips and looking at him with those big brown puppy eyes that Chester found impossible to resist. Mike taking his hand and saying, “I love you.” 

And in the next moment, the well of building pressure inside Chester exploded. He felt it rush, and he had no control as he clenched his teeth and rammed himself as hard as he could once more as a shot of cum gushed from his body and into Mike’s. Chester’s legs and hips kept moving as a second round hit, a second gush. “Miiiike,” Chester moaned with a breathy release. His body fell forward a little as he groped at his boyfriend’s sweaty back, his movements finally starting to slow. 

Mike didn’t know it would, or even could, happen, that his own orgasm would fall on the heels of Chester’s, the last hard thrust his boyfriend made before he came triggering that spot deep inside his own body and pushing him over the edge. It was the most shocking release he’d ever felt, his body quick to explode, and he felt everything tense before he shot cum all over the sheets underneath him. He didn’t even care, lost in the intensity of the moment, the huge, forceful spurts moving through him like a freight train. He felt Chester on his back, he felt his face smashed into the pillow, and he felt his legs shaking uncontrollably as he tried to stay on his knees while the ripples cascading through his body subsided. Everything felt heavy, like a weight was being pressed on him from the inside. He couldn’t even find his voice.

Chester’s mouth was open as he breathed hard. He could feel Mike doing the same under him. “Are you okay?” He managed to ask, his voice horse as he lifted himself off of his boyfriend’s back, their skin stuck together with sweat peeling apart like Chester was the band-aid being removed. He winced a little as he steadied himself, his eyes half shut as he stared down at Mike’s bent body. 

Mike paused for a second, assessing himself and his racing heart, the thoroughly sated feeling that had spread across his entire body, and he knew he could answer truthfully. “I’m better than okay. Ches, I…” He felt the emotions of what had just happened between them come on quickly, strongly, and despite his still heavy breathing, his throat constricted just a little bit as he whispered, “I’m so good… thank you for this.”

Chester smiled, a bit of delirious euphoria crossing his face. “Keep those happy thoughts for another few seconds, Sexy Boy, because I’m about to pull out. Hang on,” he warned. He knew this wasn’t going to be fun, but it would be quick. He pulled back slowly, letting his deflated length hit the air little by little. He heard and felt Mike wince, but a few seconds later and it was done, and Chester scooted out from behind his boyfriend to crash onto the bed beside him. He stared up at the ceiling fan spinning lazily over their heads. “Damn, Mike,” he said, one arm across his stomach, the other at his side. “I’m absolutely spent.” 

Reaching over to find Chester’s hand, Mike slid his fingers down his boyfriend’s arm, over his flame tattoos, and linked their fingers together. “Me, too,” he whispered, then pulled a face. “It wasn’t as hard as I thought it would be,” he admitted, sighing in relief. “You made it easier than I thought.” He let his eyes drift closed for a minute, and then he sighed again, a different kind of sigh. “But now there’s a mess to clean up before we can go to sleep, and I don’t even want to move.” 

Chester rolled his head, his eyes falling onto Mike’s blissful face. “You don’t have to,” he said. “I have to go down and pee anyway. I’ll bring stuff back with me to clean it up.” He tilted to the side enough to get his lips to Mike’s face. “I love you,” he whispered. “Just you.” 

Mike looked into Chester’s eyes and he felt the sincerity of his words, his declaration, and his heart fluttered softly in contentment and happiness. “I love you, too, Ches,” he replied, and he savored the light he saw in his boyfriend’s eyes. _He was worth the wait._

****

Chester’s eyes slid open slowly, the fog of the early morning hour still on his brain. His focus landed on the bedroom doorway and the stairs that led down to the rest of his apartment. His body was tired, and as he laid on his side, staring, the thought that last night had all been a dream fluttered through his mind. Images of Mike and the incredible time they’d shared together popped up. The way Mike had moaned his name. The feeling of being naked and unsheathed inside his boyfriend as they had climaxed almost in unison. How they had both collapsed in exhaustion and had exchanged their feelings and words of love. Love. _He loves me. He really does._

Chester smiled, still looking at the stairs just as he felt something touch his leg. He picked his head up and twisted around to look behind him, coming face to face with the back of Mike’s head. Chester turned all the way over to lay on his opposite side. He glanced at the clock - it was almost seven in the morning. The sun was pouring in overtop the half walls of the lofted bedroom from the windows downstairs, leaving Chester with a full view of his boyfriend’s naked body. Or most of it. The bottom half of Mike Shinoda was still covered by the flannel sheet they’d both crawled under the night before, after they’d discarded the heavier blanket on top. 

Chester situated himself, one arm tucked under his pillow as his other went out. He let his hand rest on Mike’s hip as he scanned his exposed skin. His boyfriend’s blue hair was disheveled, but still looking cute. His back, arms, shoulders and neck were all clean - no scars. No tattoos. Nothing other than his slightly tan skin and two little freckles on his exposed shoulder blade. It was those freckles that brought Chester’s hand up as he lightly touched them, his fingertips making a memory. 

He slid them around, first over the freckles and then up and around the nape of Mike’s neck, and the soft hairline that was there. Next he took them down over his boyfriend’s shoulder, and circled back to his spine. He didn’t press hard, his fingers feathering over the warm skin in worship and awe as they drifted all the way down to the small of Mike’s back. He traced them back up to Mike’s hip, and then without hesitation he brushed the sheet that was covering their bottom halves away. His eyes soaked up the sight of Mike’s round butt cheeks, and his legs that were pressed together as he soundly slept.

_He’s so beautiful. And sweet. He gave me his virginity last night. He’s the first one to ever do that. My first one. That’s something special, for him and for me. We’re something special._ Chester’s fingers continued to drift and explore as he ran them over Mike’s ass, soaking up the feeling of the fine hairs that were there, and then down his thigh. _Everything’s going to be fine now. It’s all out in the open. No more secrets. And I only have to work for Mark for the next two years. Just two more years and I can go do something else. Not sure what...but something. Mom’s debt will be taken care of, so I won’t have to make as much. Jason’s been showing me some stuff about how to shoot the scenes and all the aspects of running the cameras. Maybe I could do that instead when my two years are up. Mike wouldn’t have any issues with that, if I was just a camera guy._

A different kind of smile crept over Chester’s face at the thought - at the plan - of what to do once his contract was over. He had no higher education, and no marketable skills, especially since he was pretty sure putting down that he’d been working in porn for the last few years would look bad on any job application he filled out. But staying with YRS was safe and secure and if he was on the other side of the camera, then that would solve every issue. 

Chester let his hand slide over Mike’s stomach as he leaned forward, inhaling his boyfriend’s natural musky scent and the faint hint of coconut as he kissed him on the neck, then the ear, letting his tongue roll out to tease the gold hoop earring that was there. In a perfect world, he would have happily let his boyfriend sleep the day away, but it was getting late, and Chester knew Mike needed to get up and head out to work soon. _And I want to make him breakfast before he goes._

“Hey, Sexy Boy,” he whispered, pulling himself up against Mike’s backside. “It’s time to get up.” 

Chester’s whisper broke through Mike’s sleep faintly, pulling him from the comfortable bliss of darkness. He felt the gentle touch of his boyfriend’s hand across his stomach and the small kisses on his neck, and he shivered a little bit, despite the warmth of the other man’s body pressed against his back. With a sigh, Mike moved to stretch slightly before he buried his face in his pillow and wiggled his ass up against Chester, tightening the space between them. He didn’t want to move. This was the only place he wanted to be, forever.

He felt Chester’s fingers lightly drawing circles on his stomach and despite himself, Mike smiled. It felt good to wake up in Chester’s arms, and as he thought about turning his face to say good morning, he was assaulted by memories of last night - of everything that had been said, everything that had happened between them, and the fact that he wasn’t a virgin anymore. He really didn’t feel all that different. 

Mike slid his hand down and laced his fingers through Chester’s, stilling them before he moved his face enough out of his pillow to mumble, “‘morning, Ches.”

Chester rubbed his lips against Mike’s neck, inhaling him like he was something illegal. “Morning,” he mumbled back. “You feeling okay after last night?” 

As Mike became more aware of his body, his mind waking up a bit more, he had to admit he felt a little sore, but he wasn’t hurting anywhere. On the contrary, he felt almost euphoric when he went back to last night and recreated their intimacy in his mind. Happy. He was happy. “I’m feeling good,” he said, rubbing his cheek into the pillow. “Maybe a little cold,” he added, snuggling tighter against Chester. “What about you?” 

Cold. Mike was cold. There was no thought past that as Chester intertwined their legs, and pulled on Mike’s middle, bringing his chest right up against Mike’s back, flat together like two pieces of paper. “I’m tired,” he admitted with a short yawn. “But I don’t have to be anywhere. No work for a few days. But I know you have to go in. Er, right?” he asked, lifting his head. Maybe he’d been wrong. Mike didn’t seem to be in a hurry to go anywhere. Maybe somewhere along the line of the last forty-eight hours of heaven and hell, he’d gotten things mixed up and Mike didn’t have to work today. 

“Um, yeah… I’m supposed to work,” Mike said, his eyes still closed as he relished the warmth of Chester’s body. “I’m very seriously considering not moving from this bed today, though.” The thought of staying with Chester was much more interesting than going to work, and Mike battled with himself. _Six hours, that’s all. It’s just six hours of lessons and then I can come back. I should go home for a little while anyway. He probably doesn’t want me hanging around all day. He probably has other things to do._ Mike sighed. “If I don’t go, I don’t get paid… and I already missed my lessons yesterday.” 

All fuzzy feelings of Mike possibly not having to go into work stopped. “You didn’t go to work yesterday?” Chester asked with a swallow. Mike always went to work. He lived for it. He loved his students and he loved everything that went with that. _Did he not go because of me? Because of us?_ It was a sobering thought for a moment. He knew he’d been an absolute wreck after they had their fight the other night, but when Mike had shown up to his apartment last night, he seemed like he had it all together. 

Mike moved to turn over, feeling a little bit of discomfort in his muscles as he wiggled his way onto his side to face his boyfriend. With sleepy eyes he gazed at Chester’s worried expression and he wished he hadn’t said anything about yesterday. “No. I called and told them I was sick. I didn’t even want to get out of bed, and not for the same reason as now,” he said, a light smile on his lips. “I wasn’t lying, not really. I _was_ sick. Everything hurt without you.” 

“Really?” Chester asked with a gulp. “I mean, I know what you mean.” He leaned forward, his lips taking Mike’s into a soft embrace for a moment. “I’m really happy we worked everything out,” he said, as he took his boyfriend’s hand, lazily playing with it, running his fingers over each one of Mike’s in order. “Are you hungry? We can go downstairs, and I can make you something before you have to go. _If_ you have to go,” he made sure to add, just in case. He really didn’t want to be the reason Mike missed work for a second day in a row, but thoughts of the two of them lazing around the apartment all day, eating and watching the ocean and having sex in the middle of everything was enticing. 

“I do, I have to go. I mean, I should go. I don’t want to go. And I am hungry. I’m always hungry,” Mike babbled, his thoughts running the same speed as his mouth. “I need to shower, I can’t go like this, what time is it?” All of the lazy romantic thoughts of spending the day in Chester’s bed vanished as Mike started to wonder if he’d even get to work on time. _At least Chester’s place is closer than mine. And my clothes are clean enough, I just need to get the sex off of me._ Mike smiled at the thought. He’d never worried about that particular problem before. 

“Whatever you want,” Chester said as he kissed Mike one last time and then he sat up. He looked at the clock as he yawned. “It’s just after seven.” 

“Oh, okay.” Mike relaxed for a minute, letting his mind slow down as he reached for and pulled Chester back down. “I have plenty of time. Don’t have to be there until nine. And I don’t take twenty minutes in the shower like you do.” He wrapped his arms around Chester and pulled him over on top of his body, running his hands down his boyfriend’s back. “Depending on how long it takes to make breakfast, we might not need to get up for another hour.” Mike kissed across Chester’s jaw and smiled, waiting for his reaction. 

The feeling of Mike’s body underneath him sent instant pleasure tingles through Chester’s body, all of them accumulating in his dick. He felt his cock come to life, popping up and rubbing right against Mike’s. He shut his eyes, his natural impulse telling him to screw the time, and get this going. Mike wanted it, and now they were free to do so, whenever and wherever they wanted. 

He bent his head down, kissing Mike’s face, then his lips, his mind shifting to how things were about to go, but then something stopped. Something in Chester’s mind clicked. _He’ll be late. He’ll be late for work and that will be my fault. I don’t want him to get fired. He’d never forgive himself and...I don’t want anything like that to happen. Not now. Not when everything is finally right._

He let out a long breath before he quickly nuzzled his nose to Mike’s cheek. “We really need to get up,” he said, his voice low and probably unconvincing, but he was trying, despite his cock being ready to go. “We have all the time in the world for this,” he assured his boyfriend. “Besides, it’s never a bad thing to leave each other wanting more.” He let his lips touch Mike’s one last time before he rolled himself off and sat up, taking a few large gulps of air to calm everything down as his eyes searched the floor. Usually his clothes would be strung everywhere, but at the moment he wasn’t seeing anything of his. He scratched his head as he tried to remember. 

Mike sat up, his eyes covering Chester’s backside with longing. He knew Chester was right, and that there was plenty of time for more, but now that he’d had a taste, he didn’t want to stop. He’d waited a long time to feel safe enough in a relationship to have more, and waiting until nine hours from now sounded like an awfully long time. He sighed and looked at his clothes folded on top of the dresser. He still wanted to shower before he got dressed, but the thought of walking across the loft naked seemed daunting. 

“What’s wrong?” he asked as he looked back at Chester, who even from behind seemed troubled by something. _He was the one who said it was time to get up. What’s he thinking about?_

Chester turned his head, just barely catching sight of Mike behind him. “Where are my clothes?” he asked, pointing to the floor. “They’re usually, like, everywhere and I don’t see anything. Just yours over on the dresser.” He shook his head a little. Yesterday had been such an emotional runaway train, and there were some parts that were blurry from that. 

With a smirk, Mike answered, “you don’t remember? You took a shower and ran through the place naked last night.” He giggled a bit as he thought of how ridiculous that sounded. “Your clothes are probably in a pile in the bathroom.” 

Chester rubbed his forehead for a second as something like a light popped on. “Oh,” he said, sitting up straighter and snapping his fingers. “That’s right. _You_ were being impatient,” he said as he twisted around again, pointing a finger at Mike’s naked chest. “So I didn’t take any clean clothes down with me.” He rolled his eyes at himself before he stood up, his full body on display in the morning sunlight, but he didn’t care. He sauntered over to his closet and pulled open both doors, considering his options for the day. “Just let me get dressed and I’ll be on breakfast duty. Tell me what you want, and I’ll make it,” he said, without even looking over his shoulder. 

Mike took the opportunity of Chester’s back being turned to slide out of bed - carefully - and grab his pile of clothes. “While you figure out your clothes I’m gonna shower really quickly,” he said, inching his way over to the stairs. “How are you at making omelettes?” he asked, pausing with his hand on the railing and one foot down a step.

“Omelettes,” Chester repeated to himself, his mind shifting through the ingredients in his refrigerator...or at least the ingredients he thought he had. He really needed to go to the grocery store. “Yeah, I can do that, what do you want in your -” he turned around, but Mike was already gone, down the stairs. 

****

TBC


	14. Hard Questions, Harder Answers

The water felt amazing as Mike lingered in Chester’s shower, the scent of peaches billowing in the steam around him. He’d already taken care of business, washing his hair and face, and soaping up every inch of his body, probing at his skin carefully with a few fingertips, testing for tender places. It was surprising that he didn’t feel last night more than he did, just some generalized soreness from muscles he didn’t know he owned, but everything was going to be okay. He’d finally given away that piece of him he’d held onto so tightly, and he’d given it to someone he was deeply in love with.

He let the hot water beat down on his shoulders as he thought about yesterday, and all that he and Chester talked about at the kitchen table. Chester’s parents, the money, the contracts, and his job. Mike knew if they were going to stand a chance at lasting, Chester’s job situation was going to have to change. He didn’t know the scope of the debts Chester was trying to repay, or anything about this YRS place, and the longer he stood in the water disconnected from his boyfriend’s loving touch, the more questions he thought he should have asked last night. _Too late now for should have, I’ll just have to figure this out as I go. But we’re going to be fine. He loves me, really loves me, and that’s the most important thing._ Years of being subjected to his mother’s sappy romance movies had taught him that love was all that mattered.

Mike pushed unwelcome thoughts of his own parents out of his mind as he turned the water off and grabbed his towel. Scrubbing it over his hair a few times, he dried off his face and his chest, then his arms and back, then down his legs, his ass was last. Same routine, every time. He slid into his underwear and opened the door to the bathroom to let some of the steam out. He really hated putting his clothes on when his skin was still damp.

The cooler air from the living area rushed into the bathroom, and with it came the smell of coffee brewing and ham being cooked on the stove. Mike’s stomach rumbled and he realized how hungry he really was, forgetting his aversion to putting his clothes on so soon after showering as he quickly stepped into his jeans and pulled his t-shirt on. He grabbed his flannel off the counter and stepped out of the bathroom, heading straight for the kitchen.

“I smell coffee,” he said, slipping the flannel shirt over his arms as he glanced around for his mug. 

Chester smiled, his eyes never leaving his task. “Yup, coffee’s ready and I’ve got ham and cheese for your omelet. Should be ready in just a few minutes.” He tapped his pink socks to the beat in his head as he flipped the ham steak over. It was more than a enough to chunk up and sprinkle into Mike’s eggs, and what was left over, Chester was already planning on smearing it in ketchup for his own breakfast. 

Mike walked around the bar and reached for a mug, stopping to kiss the back of Chester’s neck before he poured out some coffee. “Want me to pour yours, too?” he asked, looking over to check the progress of breakfast. He was starving. 

“Sure, if you would,” Chester said, as he pulled the meat off the heat. He already had his omelette mix ready, sitting in a bowl by the stove. He’d give the ham a minute or two to cool just a little before he sliced it up, and then Mike’s eggs would be ready in no time. He scooted away from the stove to grab two plates from the cupboards and some silverware as he watched Mike out of the corner of his eye, getting their coffees ready. _This is nice. Making breakfast. Sharing duties. This is our life now, right? Or at least it is when he sleeps over. I wonder if he makes breakfast like this in the mornings with Anna? Surely I’m better at this than her,_ he thought with a smirk, the brief image of Mike’s bookworm roommate popping into his mind. 

Mike opened the refrigerator and took out the cream, knowing exactly how much to pour into Chester’s cup. He’d seen him do this ritual enough to know just what color the coffee turned when he liked it best. Replacing the cream, he reached for the sugar and spooned it in, stirring it before he scooted the mug over within Chester’s reach. “There you go, babe,” he said, and then pressed his lips together. _Babe? Where the fuck did that come from? Oh my God, he’s going to make fun of me for sure._ Mike felt his cheeks turn pink and he hid behind his coffee mug, blowing across the top of the liquid before taking a quick sip.

Chester looked over, sharply. The pet name catching his ears like fire. _Did he just call me ‘babe’? He did. I think he did._ A flip of a smile crossed his lips. “Thanks,” he offered before he looked away, a full grin coating his face. 

Mike waited a second longer, to see if Chester was going to say anything, before he set his coffee mug down and slid into place behind him, placing both hands gently on his boyfriend’s hips. “I love that you always cook for me… _babe_ ,” he said again, teasingly this time before he rested his chin on Chester’s shoulder and watched him cook. “You make me not want to leave from here, ever.” 

Chester was already chuckling. He loved the feel of Mike pressed up against him. The closeness and intimacy, even in the kitchen, was welcomed. “Then my evil plan has worked,” he said, bumping his ass backwards a little. “You didn’t know it, but this has all been a show. I lure you in with food and then you’ll never want to leave me.” 

A seriousness fell over Mike as Chester spoke, and he tightened his grip as he mumbled, “you had me in that dressing room on our first date, Ches. The minute you kissed me, I knew you were the one. As crazy as that probably sounds, I didn’t want to leave you, even then.” He sighed and kissed the side of Chester’s neck before he stepped back, taking a deep breath as he picked up his coffee and went to sit at the table. 

He ran his fingers over the handle of the mug a few times, staring down at it, before he said, “you don’t have to do anything for me to stay, Ches. I’m here, and I’m all in. Even after that conversation last night.” Mike felt the atmosphere of the morning changing a little bit, but he knew he had some things on his mind he needed to talk about before he went to work, or they would nag at him all day. He looked over at Chester, who still had his back to him as he worked at the stove. Mike took another sip of his coffee, his eyes never leaving the back of Chester’s head. “I want you to know, I appreciate you being honest with me last night. I know that was hard for you… but it’s so important that we not keep secrets from each other. You know?” 

Chester had his head down. He could hear every word Mike was saying as he chopped up the ham slab and spilled it into the pan with Mike’s eggs. _He knew. He knew I was going to be the one on our first date, and all I wanted to do was fuck him. What’s wrong with me? At least it didn’t work out that way. We wouldn’t be here if I would have gotten what I wanted that night._

He reached over and took his cup of coffee, sipping it as he collected himself. That first date was a long time ago, and they’d come a long way since then, which is what Chester reminded himself of as he turned Mike’s omelette and a minute later he shoveled it onto a plate. He took it and his leftover ham and ketchup to the table to sit down, along with his coffee. 

“I agree,” he said, clearing his throat. “No secrets is good...so anything, Mike, anything you want to know, you just have to ask.” He looked up, meeting his boyfriend’s beautiful eyes, and he smiled. 

“This smells awesome,” Mike complimented as he picked up his fork. They each took a few bites in silence before Mike put his fork back down and gazed over at Chester. _I love how he drowns every bite of meat he eats in ketchup. I don’t think he can even taste the food underneath all that ketchup, but that’s okay. He looks like a little kid over there, happily covering everything in the stuff. I hate interrupting his condiment bliss._ He cleared his throat and looked down at his plate. Half his food was already gone.

“I do have a question… about work,” he said cautiously, looking up to watch Chester’s face for his reaction. All he saw was a slight pause in Chester’s chewing as he looked up, meeting Mike’s eyes. “I, um… well, I was thinking, do you… well, do you make movies with a… lot of different guys? Or is it like, I don’t know… a series or something where you’re always with the same person?” _Nothing like starting off with the hardest question you can think of, Mike, Jesus. At least you didn’t ask him what his number is._

It wasn’t a shocking question, but Chester knew he needed to be careful how he worded his answer. He wanted to be open and honest, but he also knew Mike wasn’t the most up to date person when it came to things like porn and multiple partners. He swallowed down his bite of ham and took a sip of coffee before he said, “Well, it depends. I’ve been doing this for two years, so there’s been a few guys. Mostly, we only work with each other,” he said, before he rolled his eyes at himself. “I mean, YRS has exclusive models...actors...whatever you want to call us. Now and again Mark will let someone from another company come in as like a guest role or whatever, but usually we stay within just our own group, which is nice. And, there are series, sometimes. Porn is all about numbers. More movies means more money, for them and for us. Here lately I’ve been mostly working with Ryan. Our movies get good ratings, and Mark’s been wanting to get the most out of that as he can.” 

“Ryan? The guy you shared a room with in Hawaii?” Mike tried to keep his voice under control but he felt it edging toward panic a little bit. “Isn’t that… awkward?” He looked down at his plate, picking up his fork and moving a bit of egg around just to have something to do. 

Chester shook his head. “No,” he answered honestly. “Ryan’s my friend. I’d rather share a room with him than most of the other guys.” 

It was a hard statement for Mike to hear, the idea of being ‘friends’ with someone who last night Chester had made seem like meant absolutely nothing. There were relationships there. Maybe not loving ones, but friendships, and Mike wasn’t sure how he felt about that. He poked at his eggs some more before he took another bite, reminding himself that Chester wasn’t up making breakfast for Ryan - he was with him. What they had meant something, and Mike had to figure out how to protect it. 

“And… one other question,” Mike said, finished with hearing about people at YRS for the time being. “You weren’t at all surprised, the first time we were… well, the first time I went down on you,” Mike felt his face flush a bit, “that I suggested a condom. I assume you use those at… work?”

Chester’s eyes darted to the side. He had actually kinda hoped that question wouldn’t come up. But here they were, and he knew he owed it to Mike to be honest. That was the deal, what they’d agreed to. He took a deep breath before he looked back at his boyfriend. “I was glad you suggested it,” he stated honestly. “If you wouldn’t have, I would of.” He stopped for a minute, trying to get his tongue to do what he wanted, his mind racing to find the right way to break this to the person he cared so much about. “We use them for anal sex, like I said last night. I’ve never done that with anyone without a condom. It’s actually YRS policy - no barebacking. But, that’s all we use them for. Everything else is condom free. For the cameras, of course, which means that everything has to be seen. There’s no swallowing, at least nothing significant,” he mumbled. “People like to see it. They like to see the end result, if that’s on someone’s face or on their back...wherever,” he said, closing his mouth. He’d said enough about that, he was pretty sure by the way Mike wasn’t looking at him anymore. 

“Oh.” Mike put his fork down again and rested his elbow on the table, his forehead meeting his hand as he dropped his head. _Why on earth did I ask that question? I didn’t need to know that, not even a little bit._ He sat there for a minute, his chest feeling a bit tight. It was all really confusing in his head as he pondered his intimate relationship with Chester, thought over how cautious he had been and how accepting his boyfriend had been throughout everything. _I have to get past it, I have to. He’s respected me at every turn. He’s been careful and he’s made sure everything moved at my pace. I’m the one that insisted on the condoms initially, and he went with it. That means something, I can’t let this freak me out._

Mike raised his head and looked at Chester, who had probably been staring at the top of his head the entire time he’d been thinking. “I don’t want to talk about any more right now,” he started, then rushed to continue when he saw Chester’s worried expression, “I’m not mad, Ches… it’s just a lot to process. It’s hard. I want you to be all mine. I’m not good at sharing.” He reached across the table for Chester’s hand.

There was no thought behind it. Chester took his boyfriend’s hand the moment it was offered. He squeezed it. “I am all yours,” he said with a soft smile. “Work is just work. Believe me, Mike, it’s the most unsexy thing in the world. If you ever meet Mark you’ll understand. Try doing anything with him standing ten feet away yelling orders,” he offered with a soft laugh in an attempt to lighten the mood. 

“Maybe I _do_ need to meet this guy,” Mike said immediately. “Maybe I need to march in there and tell him you quit. And don’t tell me you can’t quit. I’m sure there’s a loophole, somewhere.” 

Chester let out a sigh as he pulled his hand away. “Mike, you know I can’t quit. Not yet. And you don’t want to go to YRS,” he dismissed quickly as he stood up. He picked up his empty plate and coffee cup and headed back to the kitchen. “So later, right? You’re coming back?” 

Mike frowned at the abrupt change in Chester’s attitude. He’d clearly struck a nerve. He looked down at his plate, feeling overwhelmed suddenly by everything that had happened in the past two days. “If you want me, here, Ches, I’ll be here,” he said in a small voice. Mike picked up his fork and stabbed his eggs as he convinced himself, _don’t cry, that’s so ridiculous. He’s just upset because everything about work sucks, he’s not mad at you. Eat your eggs, Mike._

****

“Move your thumb over, Bri, you’re supposed to be on middle C,” Mike said patiently, watching the eight year-old’s hand position over the piano. The little girl slid her right hand over one key and looked at Mike for approval. “That’s it, now, go ahead and play the top line for me.”

Mike could close his eyes and still know if his student was using the correct fingerings, he’d heard line seventy-four from the piano book so many times. He was trying to pay attention but his mind kept coming back to Chester, to the way they had left things that morning. While Bri fumbled over the simple line, Mike thought about how he’d taken his plate to the sink where Chester was rinsing off the pan he’d used to make breakfast, and how he’d simply turned his cheek for Mike to kiss him goodbye. All of the comfortable feelings from the morning, the happiness he’d felt waking up, the teasing way he’d called Chester ‘babe’, it had all felt a million miles away when Mike had turned and left for work. The air had been tense between them, and Mike was sorry he’d even started asking questions that morning. 

“Okay, try that again, and this time, slow it down a little and keep a consistent tempo.” Mike nodded his approval at Bri, and she played the line again. 

_How does he expect me to act? I haven’t even known about his job for a whole day yet, and he thinks I should just be cool with it all? I’m trying, I thought I was pretty calm this morning. I have no idea why he got so upset when I mentioned going to YRS. I was only joking. Mostly._

Mike placed his left hand on the piano as Bri finished the line again. “That was so much better! Now, I’m going to play the bass line with you, so you can hear how it’s supposed to sound. Then I want you to play both lines, okay?” He glanced down at Bri, who nodded happily.

His hand was on autopilot as they played the four measure line together. _He asked if I was coming back, but when I said I would, he didn’t answer. I wonder if he really wants me to come back or not?_ Mike could feel the familiar self-doubt of past relationships starting to creep in, just as he felt his phone vibrate in his back pocket. _Damn. I always turn that off while I’m teaching._ He finished the line with Bri before he told her to do it again, herself, and reached for his phone. 

**10:45 am** _I’m in the cereal aisle. I’m looking for Lucky Charms, but did you know there’s such a thing as chocolate Lucky Charms???? Isn’t chocolate better than the plain ones? Which one do you want? There’s like no cereal left at my house._

Mike smiled briefly as he looked at Chester’s message. It was true. He’d eaten every bit of cereal while his boyfriend was in Hawaii. Cereal didn’t have to be cooked.

 **10:46 am** _Regular. Chocolate ones are gross._

He set his phone on top of the piano and praised Bri for hacking her way through the line. “I think that one needs a little more practice this week, I’m writing it in your journal,” he said, thinking more about Lucky Charms than piano. “Before we finish today, why don’t we play a little duet?” Mike reached to turn the page as his phone went off again. 

**10:49 am** _Fine. No chocolate Lucky Charms. I’m trusting you on this. What about chocolate milk? Or there’s banana milk or almond milk. No, never mind that. That sounds gross. How do you even get milk out of an almond?_

Mike rolled his eyes. He was trying to work.

 **10:51 am** _Just regular milk, Ches._

 **10:52 am** _Okay, be boring. Are you busy? You probably are. Okay, I won’t text again unless it’s life or death decisions here at the grocery store._

 _Sure_ , Mike thought, a bit of a smile on his lips. _Maybe I misjudged this morning. He doesn’t seem mad now._ He played a duet with Bri, and listened to her chatter about the gymnastics lesson she was going to next. “That’s right, last week you were telling me you were working on the balance beam. How’s that going?” Mike asked, writing a few practice notes in her journal. 

“I can do a cartwheel on it now!” she said, clapping her hands together. “I love gymnastics!”

“But not as much as you love piano, right?” Mike asked, looking at her as she stood up. He heard his phone vibrate again as the little girl threw her arms around his neck in a hug. _He’s got to stop texting me while I’m teaching. People are going to start asking questions, and I don’t want to get in trouble… or worse, have anyone find out that it’s Chester texting me… what if someone knows he’s a porn star!_

It didn’t occur to Mike that anyone who would know Chester was a porn star probably wouldn’t say anything about it, at least not in the moment. It would be the kind of thing someone would reveal anonymously. He hugged Bri back briefly and tried not to worry about his phone going off constantly in her lesson. It didn’t seem to phase his student, and her mother had been immersed in a book and hardly paying attention. 

“I love piano, too, Mike!” she said, picking up her practice journal and her book from the stand. 

“Same time next week,” he said, glancing at her mother as she rose from her spot in the corner of the practice room. He always thought it kind of silly that the studio policy was a parent had to be present during lessons for opposite sex students under twelve. _If only they all knew I was gay._

He held the door open for them to leave and welcomed his next student in. _Eleven o’clock. Only five more hours to go._ As Bryce settled in and got out his practice journal, Mike picked up his phone to see another message from Chester.

 **10:59 am** _What about dinner tonight? I’m thinking we can make a huge ass thing of spaghetti. With meatballs and garlic bread and salad and cheese all over fuckin’ everythng. Sounds good, doesn’t it??? Of course if you’re not into that we can have something else. But seriously, consider the spaghetti. We can eat it upstairs in bed. Naked. I’ll feed you saucy noodles :)_

Mike covered his screen with his free hand as he felt his face burn red. _He can’t be texting me this stuff while I’m teaching. Someone might see it by accident!_

 **11:02 am** _I’m teaching! It doesn’t matter, you know I’ll eat anything._

He ignored the rest of the text and set his phone on the piano, face down. “Okay, Bryce, let’s start with your scales. Start with C, please, and move up chromatically.” Bryce was an above average student, but he was no Drew. Mike let his thoughts drift away from naked noodles as he wondered how Drew was doing. It had been almost two weeks since the incident, and Mike had only talked to his mother once. He was due for a lesson tomorrow, and so far, they hadn’t canceled. 

Bryce was only halfway through the scales when the phone vibrated again. He knew he should just turn it off, but he didn’t want Chester to get mad. With a sideways glance at his student, Mike picked up the phone again.

 **11:06 am** _I’m sorry, Mike. You’re right, you’re working._

A little flicker of disappointment crossed Mike’s mind when it appeared that Chester was giving up so easily. _Oh well. I need to focus on this anyway._ The scales were completed and Mike was ready to move on to the piece he’d assigned last week when his phone vibrated again. Mike didn’t even hesitate to pick it up. 

**11:20 am** _Leaving the store now. Just wanted to let you know I bought everything without your input. So there. :) If you don’t like it, I’ll go back tomorrow. *smooches*_

Grinning like an idiot, Mike read over the text twice while Bryce started in on the solo piece.

 **11:22 am** _I’m sure it’s fine. Now, let me teach. ILY_

He opened his settings and toggled the vibrate on silent switch to off, placing the phone face down and turning his attention fully on Bryce. _We’re going to have to talk about not texting while I’m working when I get home._

The hours passed more quickly than Mike had anticipated, once he stopped being distracted by thoughts of Chester, and text messages. By the time four o’clock rolled around, he was anxious to get out of the studio and back to his boyfriend. He wanted to make up for the way they’d left things that morning.

Mike picked up his phone and saw two messages, one from Anna, and one from Chester. He clicked on Anna’s first, thinking it would be brief.

 **2:34 pm** _Hey, Mike, I’m sure you’re teaching. I tried calling, but it went to your voicemail. Just wanted to make sure you’re okay. I was surprised you weren’t here last night. Just concerned, I know you weren’t feeling well._

He picked up his backpack and slung it over his shoulder, his keys in one hand and his phone in the other. He clicked on Chester’s text instead of answering her immediately.

 **11:28 am** _I love you, too. See you tonight for spaghetti and naked eating in bed. You have no choice._

Mike smiled at his phone and clicked on Anna’s message again. He should have let her know he was okay last night, but it hadn’t even crossed his mind. He also knew if he was going back to Chester’s he needed clothes for tomorrow, and he wouldn’t be at the apartment long. 

**4:06 pm** _Anna, I’m swinging by the apartment in about thirty. Won’t be there long, I’ll explain then. I’m fine, though, don’t worry._

He fired off the message, then pulled up his favorites list and called Chester as he walked out to his car. 

“Sexy Boy,” Chester swooned as he answered the phone. He leaned back on the couch, staring up at the ceiling, a smile on his face. “You better be calling to say you missed me and not canceling out on spaghetti in bed. I’d be crushed.” 

Mike opened his passenger door and tossed his backpack inside. “Hey, I wouldn’t do that,” he said, crossing back behind his car again to slide in the driver’s seat. “I was just thinking, well, I didn’t want to _assume_ that you wanted me to stay over, but if you do, I need to go by my apartment first and pick up a few things. I don’t think I can wear the same shirt to work again tomorrow.” He started the car and waited to see if he was invited to spend the night again before he backed out of his parking space. 

Chester sat forward, the grin on his face gone. He reached for the remote to turn the television down. “Of course,” he said, his eyes drifting across the loft, all humor gone from his tone. “I guess I was just figuring you were figuring on staying. I mean, you don’t have to, of course. But once we get to spaghetti in bed, you leaving afterwards wouldn’t be any fun.” 

The seriousness in Chester’s answer made Mike giggle. “Okay, babe,” he said, backing out of his parking spot, “give me a bit. You know how much traffic sucks on the way to my place. I’ll be as fast as I can.” He looked both ways before turning out onto the main road. “I’ll even wait to shower ‘til I get to you, just to save time.” 

“Probably a good idea,” Chester answered, a bit of relief floating over him as he stood up. “Maybe we can share a shower later. Spaghetti in bed can get messy.” 

Mike felt the shiver of excitement make its way down his spine as he thought about his boyfriend, naked and wet in the shower. “Sounds like a plan, Ches. I’ll text you when I leave my place.” He smiled before he said, “I love you.”

“Love you, too. Hurry up. Or, don’t hurry because you need to drive safe and all that, but hurry,” Chester said, before he said goodbye and the call ended. 

****

Anna was trying to sort her books in the living room, but it wasn’t going so well. She knew she had too many, but really, was there a limit to great works of literature? _No. Definitely not. We’ll just have to reorganize in here._ She let out a sigh as she picked up one stack of five books and moved them about three feet before she sat them down. _Or maybe we’re just out of room._ She wiped her forehead, feeling the heat of the day just as she heard the door opening, and a second later Mike walked in, his backpack slung over his shoulder. 

“Mike,” she said, all thoughts of books forgotten as she bolted across the small space. “Are you really okay? I was worried when you were gone last night. You look pale, are you sure you’re feeling okay? You probably shouldn’t have gone to work so soon after being sick.” She reached to feel his forehead, before she added, “I almost started calling hospitals last night. I would have called Chester, but I don’t have his number.” 

“Whoa, wow, slow down,” Mike said, holding his hands up to ward off Anna’s prying touches and questions. “I’m sorry, I should have left a note, I wasn’t thinking.” _And I forgot that I was supposed to be sick. But oh well._ “I felt better, and I went to Chester’s,” he said, his gaze shifting away from Anna’s concerned look and around the room. “I’m sorry I worried you.”

Anna took a deep breath and took a step back. She knew it wasn’t her place to be so motherly with Mike, but she couldn’t help it sometimes. “Well, it’s okay,” she said, waving the issue away. “I’m just glad you’re feeling better. You should really sit down though, you look tired.” She took another step away, and after almost tripping over a pile of books, she made it to her favorite chair, motioning for Mike to sit on their small excuse for a couch. 

Mike shook his head. “I’m not staying, Anna, I just came by for some clean clothes. I’m going back to Chester’s for the night.” He smiled, thoughts of naked noodles crossing his mind. “I might even take two changes of clothes. It’s almost the weekend. I may not be back until Saturday. You know… if things go well.” 

Anna smiled. “Well? Mike, if you keep spending the night over there, you two are bound to take that step. I assume,” she said, her hand going to her purple blouse. She could see that Mike wasn’t wanting to stand around and talk, the way his eyes kept flashing toward the hallway, where the bedrooms were. But she really wanted him to stay and talk to her for at least a few more minutes. She wanted to hear all about his night with Chester and what plans they had for the next few days. “It’s too bad he has to work every single weekend. Seems odd hours to keep, doesn’t it?” she asked as an afterthought. 

The smile faded just a bit, just for a moment, when Anna mentioned work, but Mike forced himself to stay calm. _She doesn’t know. Don’t give her any reason to be suspicious._ “It’s just… the company he works for. I can’t complain,” Mike said hastily, his words tumbling over each other in his attempt to stay calm, “he makes good money, Anna, and he’s home all week, I mean, it’s fine, it won’t always have to be like that. He’ll move up in the company, or something, and he’ll get better hours,” he said, taking a few steps toward his bedroom. “We’ll talk this weekend, okay? I promised I wouldn’t be long, he’s got dinner waiting for me.” With that, Mike opened the door to his room and slunk inside, quickly closing the door and tossing his bag on the bed. 

_I’ve got to be quick, before she asks more questions._ He crossed the room with purpose, grabbing another bag and stuffing two pairs of jeans, socks, underwear, two undershirts, a flannel, and a hoodie inside. Other than a few things out of the bathroom, that was all he needed besides his work stuff. He paused, looking in the mirror at his hair - it was time for a touch up. Maybe he could appease Anna by suggesting they do that this weekend.

He opened the door and came face to face with his roommate. 

“Okay, Mike,” she said, her brows a little narrowed as she measured every move of his eyes and twitch in his lips. “What’s going on? I’m not trying to be nosy,” she insisted, “but you’re acting a little off.” 

“Nothing, I’m fine. I told you, he’s waiting on me for dinner, and you know how bad traffic is. I just don’t want to keep him waiting. Look, this weekend, you and me, we’ll do pancakes and you can dye my hair again.” He flashed her a winning smile as he scooted around her and slipped into the bathroom for his stuff. “I know how much you love doing that, it will be fun.” Mike scooped his toiletries into a small bag and turned around, sliding past Anna again.

She watched him as she admitted defeat. Like it or not, it was clear she was no match for Chester Bennington. “Okay,” she relented, even though she didn’t like it. “We can do that. I’ll pick up your color tomorrow so I’ll have it ready. But promise me that you’ll give me all the details this weekend. Alright?” 

Mike zipped up his bag and lifted it, slinging his backpack across the other shoulder. “You’re the best, Anna,” he said, giving her a quick peck on the cheek. “I promise, we’re on for this weekend. All the details, anything you want to know.” He patted his pockets, checking for his keys and phone. “Besides, he may get tired of me before then and I’ll be back sooner, you never know.” Stepping out of the bedroom, Mike pulled the door shut behind him and waited until Anna turned, following her down the hallway. 

“Tired of you? Mike,” she said as they got to the living room and she turned to face him one last time before he left for the night, “if there’s one thing I’m pretty sure of, it’s that he’s not going to get tired of you.” 

With his hand on the doorknob, Mike paused as they looked at each other. “I really, really hope not,” he said before he opened the door, and then he was gone. 

****

Chester stirred his spaghetti sauce, the smell of tomato, onion, and garlic filling his nostrils as he stood with his cell phone to his ear. “I don’t know what to tell you,” he said, his eyes lost in the red abyss of what he knew was going to taste amazing as it bubbled, “but I wouldn’t let him do that. That could really get awkward.” 

The timer on the oven dinged, and Chester grabbed his lobster mit to pull the garlic bread from the oven, just as the doorbell rang. He turned, his stomach fluttering a little. _Mike’s here. Need to end this conversation right now._ “Look I -” He tried to say as he headed for the door, but he couldn’t get a word in edgewise. He rolled his eyes as he mumbled an “Mhm,” instead before he unlocked the door and opened it to see his boyfriend standing there with a smile on his face and an overnight bag on his shoulder. “Hey,” Chester mouthed softly as he leaned in and quickly pecked Mike on the lips before he turned around and headed for the kitchen. “Mhm,” he mumbled into the phone again. 

Mike followed Chester inside, turning to close the front door and lock it behind him. _Wonder who he’s talking to. I guess I’ll take my stuff upstairs._ He made his way into the kitchen, dropping his backpack in one of the chairs they never sat in and trying to get Chester’s attention.

Chester was turning burners off on the stove. “I know, but you can’t do that,” he said, his attention hopping from spaghetti to the front door, which is when he spun around to see where Mike had gone. He smiled the instant he saw him standing by the kitchen table. “Well, yeah, I mean it would be a seriously asshole move if he did that, but you and I both know Jason can be like that.”

Mike’s ears perked up when he heard the name Jason. _Work. He’s talking to someone from work._ He didn’t want to hear anymore. The last time they’d talked work, that morning, it had ended with tension between them. Mike just wanted naked noodle time. Catching Chester’s eye, he lifted his bag and pointed to the loft. “I’m going to take this upstairs,” he whispered.

Chester nodded, his eyes going soft for a moment as he watched his boyfriend head for the stairs. “Look, Ryan, I really gotta go,” he said quickly, “I’ve, ah, I’ve got someone here. If you know what I mean.” 

_Someone? So now I’m just someone?_ Mike frowned as he heard the hesitation in Chester’s voice. _I don’t like that. God, I don’t want to talk about his work, but here I am, about to ask him why I’m just someone and not ‘my boyfriend,’ or at the very least, ‘Mike.’ Nah, I can’t do that. He’ll think I’m just grilling him. I can’t just outright ask. Ugh. This is going to bother me all night long._ The rest of the conversation was out of earshot as Mike ascended the stairs and went to set his bag down on his side of the bed.

 _My side of the bed. I like that,_ he thought, his thoughts softening for a moment. Everything looked clean and fresh upstairs, the bed neatly made, and Mike realized Chester had washed again. _At least we’re both clean people. It’s not like living with Anna._

By the time he made his way back downstairs, Chester had ended his call, and was draining spaghetti over the sink. Mike went over to the bar and rested his elbows on it, watching as Chester finished dinner. “Everything okay?” 

Chester glanced over his shoulder. “Oh, yeah, don’t worry about it,” he said as he dumped the drained noodles back into the hot pot so he could add the sauce and meatballs. “That was just Ryan,” he added. “He’s going through some stuff and just needed to talk.” 

“Mmm,” Mike said, frowning again already. Before he could help himself, he said, “do you guys talk often outside of work?”

Chester set the empty sauce pot in the sink, letting out a long breath before he looked over at Mike. “I don’t know,” he answered with a shrug. “What’s a lot?” He looked down for a second before he met Mike’s eyes. “He’s just needy sometimes. He’s our age,” he said, motioning between them. “And we have some things in common. It’s easier to talk about work stuff with work people, you know? That’s all it was.” 

Hearing that Ryan was their age felt like the wrong thing to say, and Mike felt the jealousy flare up inside him, swift and hot under his skin. “And I’m just _someone_?” he said quietly, holding Chester’s gaze. “I don’t work there, so I don’t matter when you’re talking to your ‘work friends’?” It was hard to keep his voice level but he was trying, hard.

Chester’s face skewed slightly. “‘Someone’? What are you talking about?” 

“When you were talking to Ryan, just now. You told him you had to go because you had ‘someone’ here. Why not, ‘my boyfriend,’ or ‘Mike’ even? Or is that more of your work and personal life separation?” It dawned on Mike in the middle of his question that the answer might really be that simple, and he felt like an ass.

Chester felt his mouth and throat instantly go dry. “Yeah,” he said with a nod. “Mike, that’s all it is.” He walked around to stand close to his boyfriend. “Don’t be mad and don’t read any more into that than there is. I have to do it this way. I’ve wanted to tell Ryan about you, I have. I’ve come really close a lot of times, but, then that just makes the lines blurry. When I’m there, I’m there and when I’m here with you, I really don’t want work to be a part of that. Yeah, Ryan and I talk some outside of work, but as friends. And, I guess, I guess I was waiting to tell him after I knew we were going to be okay.” He lifted his hand and slid his fingers down Mike’s arm. “I’m sorry. Of course you’re not just ‘someone’ but I didn’t mean anything bad by it.” 

Just the touch of Chester’s hand calmed the anxiety Mike had been feeling moments earlier. He blew out a long breath before he leaned forward and caught Chester’s lips in a slow, deep kiss, the kiss he’d wanted when he walked in but instead had found his boyfriend on the phone. “I’m sorry,” he said when they broke apart, his breathing already labored just from the one kiss. “I just… it’s so hard, I don’t want to think about it, not at all, and it seems like ever since you told me, it’s all I can think about. It’s in my head all the time. And I just wish it could go away. That you could leave so I wouldn’t _have_ to think about it.” 

Chester held back repeating that he couldn’t quit. It didn’t matter how many times Mike asked, he was stuck for the next two years, and if they were going to work as a couple, Mike was going to have to accept that. “Why don’t we not talk about work anymore tonight,” he suggested instead. “We’ve got better things planned. Come on, Sexy Boy,” he said jovially as he shook Mike’s arm, “we’ve got spaghetti in bed, and then a shower to look forward to.” He let his hands stay clasped around Mike’s arm as he leaned forward, sucking on Mike’s ear for a moment before he let him go and turned back toward the kitchen. “This is ready, and I know I’m starving,” he said, hoping this would be the end of work talk. 

For just a second, Mike thought about asking one more time for Chester to quit, but he knew that conversation was going nowhere tonight. He needed a plan before he asked again. So he nodded as he said instead, “yeah, I’m starving too. That omelette was a long time ago.” He made his way around the bar and inhaled deeply, and felt his stomach respond immediately. “Let’s eat so we can go get that shower,” he said, picking up a plate and clearing his mind of any last lingering work related thoughts. 

****

TBC


	15. The First Sunday

Chester checked his watch. He didn’t have too much longer and he’d really need to get his ass out the door. He swiveled on his heels, scanning the bedroom one last time. _Got all my clothes, and my journal, and my paperwork._ He let out a sigh, his eyes softening as he looked at the freshly made bed, and how the pillows on Mike’s side were fluffed and positioned a little differently from the ones on his side. _I’m going to miss him._

He pursed his lips and told himself to suck it up. It was time to go to work, and everything here in his own private paradise would just have to wait until he could come back to it. He clicked off the light, and trotted down the stairs. 

“Mike,” he called, checking the time again as he headed for the kitchen, where his boyfriend was planted at the table, swallowing down his breakfast, “I gotta get going. Are you sure you won’t change your mind and stay here while I’m gone?” Chester asked as he brushed off his black t-shirt, and fanned a hand over his red-tipped mohawk. Leaving for the weekend to go to YRS always left him anxious about his appearance. More so than usual. 

Mike looked up from his bowl of Lucky Charms and he felt the corners of his mouth turn down in a frown. The past several days had been perfect, the two of them holed up together in the loft as soon as Mike came home from work. There had been dinner every night, coffee every morning, and different intimacies every time they could squeeze them in. He didn’t want Chester to leave, because the minute he walked out the door, it meant he was no longer only Mike’s… and he was someone else, someone he didn’t even know, and Mike couldn’t bear to imagine the things he’d be doing. It had been easy to ignore it, to not talk about Chester’s job during their evenings together, but the fact that he was leaving this morning and Mike was going back to his place meant the whole situation was indeed real.

He tried to keep his voice steady as he answered, “I promised Anna some girl time this weekend. You know, catching up and hair dye and all that. I haven’t been home in almost a week.” There was a spoonful of marshmallows waiting to be scooped up and Mike was ready for the sugary goodness as he lifted his spoon again. “I’ll be here Sunday when you get back… if you want me to be.” He popped the marshmallows in his mouth and tried to let the sweetness improve his mood.

Chester smiled as he walked around to the back of Mike’s chair. He leaned forward, wrapping his arms around his boyfriend’s neck and kissing the side of his head. “I always want you here,” he whispered. “But do as you must. Girl time and hair dye. Sounds like fun. Tell her I said hi,” he stated before a large sigh escaped him. He let his head rest against Mike’s. “I’m gonna miss you, Sexy Boy.” 

There was just heartbeat’s pause before Mike said, “I’ll miss you too, Ches. Promise you’ll call?” He hated the desperation that had crept into his voice.

“You couldn’t stop me if you tried. Every night, okay?” Chester asked as he kissed Mike’s ear one more time before he stood himself up straight. “I think I’m going to take some coffee with me,” he mumbled before he walked into the kitchen, opening cabinet doors to find the silver and black travel thermos he knew was hiding somewhere. 

“Okay.” Mike pushed his chair back and took his empty bowl to the sink, rinsing it out before he moved to put it in the dishwasher. “Are you looking for your travel mug? I think I put it in the cabinet over there,” he said, nodding his head to the left. “Sorry, I wasn’t sure where it went.” 

Chester followed Mike’s nod, and sure enough, he found what he was looking for. He spun around, grabbing the half-empty coffee pot. He filled his thermos, and clipped the cap on before he looked back at Mike, who looked like he was suddenly the saddest person on the face of the earth. 

“Hey,” Chester said softly, leaving his coffee on the counter as he walked over and took his boyfriend gently by the waist. “You okay? I mean, this is nothing new. You know I have to go work.” 

Nodding slowly, Mike looked down at his socked feet, and Chester’s neatly laced black Adidas. _Nothing new… except now I know what you’re doing when you’re away._ He nudged his toe toward one shoe, bumping it softly as he settled his hands on his boyfriend’s chest, feeling his heartbeat under his palm. Steady, calm, so different from Mike’s racing pulse. “I know,” he said, not looking up. “It’s just different. Now that I know.”

They stood there for a second, and Mike hated himself for bringing it up, for sounding so needy, and for setting them up to leave on bad terms. He slid his hands down Chester’s shirt, then around his waist and pulled him in close, burying his face in Chester’s neck. “I’m sorry,” he breathed, “I’ll try not to think about it. I’ll try to pretend you’re doing something else. I don’t know what, but I’ll figure it out. I have to. I’ll keep myself busy.” Mike turned his lips into Chester’s neck and kissed him softly, and his heart ached. _Don’t go, don’t go, don’t go._

Chester tightened his hold on Mike’s waist, pulling him a smidge closer. “I love you,” he said, “and nothing’s going to change that. I hope you have fun over the weekend,” he offered, trying to keep everything light. He had to get out the door in a matter of minutes, and the last thing he wanted was for there to be tension between them or worse, to leave with Mike wiping tears from his eyes. “It’s only two days. It will be two days of not having you next to me, and that always sucks.” He smiled as he leaned back and kissed his boyfriend properly, letting their lips mold together in a damp cocoon for a moment. 

Their kiss broke, and Chester leaned back, his eyes locked with Mike’s large puppy dog orbs that he adored so much. “And if it starts to get to you,” he said, running his fingers playfully up the front of Mike’s shirt, “just remember that I’ve always got my phone. Text me,” he said with a little emphasis, fisting Mike’s shirt. “Okay?” 

“I will. But I’ll try not to text you a million times when you can’t answer, the way you do me at work.” Mike felt a little lift in his heart as he teased his boyfriend. They’d had to talk about that, texting while Mike was teaching, but sometimes Chester just couldn’t help himself from sending exactly what was on his mind at any given moment. Mike had learned to only check his phone between students. “I know you have to go… want me to lock up in a minute? I’m not quite ready yet.” He stepped back and touched his hair. “Gotta do something about this, and brush my teeth, and get the rest of my stuff in my bag.” He stopped short and took a breath. _Mike, you’re rambling again. Wrap it up._ With a sheepish smile, he finished with, “go ahead, I’ll take care of stuff here.” 

Chester nodded, even though he hated leaving. He pecked Mike on the lips one last time before he grabbed his coffee, keys, and bag and headed out the door. 

As soon as the door shut behind Chester, Mike felt his whole body slump in defeat. It was hard to pretend he was okay when he wasn’t. The entire apartment felt empty in a totally different way than it had when Chester had been in Hawaii. Mike had enjoyed that alone time, relaxing among Chester’s things, painting for him and thinking about him and missing him with his whole heart. Now, he was missing him with his whole heart but it made him anxious to be there alone, waiting, thinking. He wanted to be out the door and somewhere else, where everything he looked at didn’t make him imagine Chester there.

In a few minutes he’d taken care of his hair and teeth, and tossed the rest of his stuff in his bag. He grabbed both the overnight bag and his work backpack, and stopped to look around the apartment one more time, making sure the lights were turned off and nothing was amiss. Work today would be a welcome relief from the realities of Chester being away for the weekend. It would make the day go faster.

He made sure the door was locked behind him before he slowly made his way down the hall. 

****

As he’d expected, Mike’s day passed quickly. Fridays were always nice, his short day when lessons ended at three o’clock and he didn’t have to battle such horrific traffic on the way back to his place. _It’s been nice staying at Chester’s, it’s so much closer to work. I hate traffic. I’d give anything to never make this drive again._

He patted his phone in his pocket again and frowned. Chester hadn’t texted at all today, not even once. From his experience the past few months, Mike knew that was typical of the days he was at work - but it still stung a little bit after the past week, and all the random messages he’d grown accustomed to getting throughout his day. _I know it’s always like this, has been every weekend he’s gone to work. It shouldn’t bother me more now, just because I know he’s making porn. Right?_

By the time Mike pulled into his parking spot at his apartment, he’d almost worked himself into a full blown anxiety attack over the text messaging, or lack thereof. He sat in the car for a minute, taking a few deep breaths, before he pulled out his phone and opened a new message to Chester.

**4:02 pm** _Just wanted to let you know I’m home. Miss you. Lots._

That was going to have to do for now. Chester would text him back when he could. It was time to face Anna, and Mike knew he had to present a much cooler and relaxed attitude to her, or they would spend the rest of the night analyzing his bad mood, and how that related to Chester, and why he was anxious at all when he’d never let on that anything was amiss in their relationship. As far as Anna was concerned, everything with Chester was fine. Mike took another deep breath and grabbed his things, heading for the front door. 

Inside the apartment, Anna was already setting up everything for their hair dying session in the kitchen. Usually she liked to do such things in the bathroom, but the light in there was so bad, that it made more sense to move the operation underneath their bright kitchen lighting instead. She had a chair set up for Mike to sit in, and all her needed supplies and tools lined up on the yellow countertop like soldiers. 

She was just pulling on her latex gloves when she heard the front door open. She looked up to see Mike walking in, and her eyes zeroed in on him. _His hair does need this. It’s getting patchy and faded. I should have spotted this weeks ago. Of course he hasn’t really been here much. That must be why I’ve missed his hair care needs._ “Hey!” she hollered with a wave. “I’m just setting up for you. You’ve got perfect timing.” 

“That’s me, perfect timing,” Mike said, dropping his backpack and duffle bag inside the door. He spotted the set up in the kitchen and groaned. “Please tell me you’re going to let me eat first before you get started. It’s been a long time since breakfast.” The thought of breakfast pinched at his heart for a moment but he shoved away thoughts of Chester’s face earlier that morning, thoughts of his kisses and his warm embrace, thoughts of how he wouldn’t see him for two more days.

“I suppose,” she said, snapping off her glove. “There’s stuff for sandwiches in there,” she said, flipping her hand toward the refrigerator before she leaned against the counter, tucking her pink striped hair behind her ear. “Did Chester get off okay this morning?” 

Mike sighed, making his way into the kitchen. “Yeah. It was harder to see him go this morning than usual,” he admitted, then quickly recovered himself enough to say, “you know, after being at his place all week.” He bent behind the open door of the fridge for the grape jelly and loaf of bread that was pushed to the back, successfully hiding his face from Anna for a moment. “You want me to make you one?” Emerging from the refrigerator, he waved the jelly in Anna’s direction as he opened a cabinet for the peanut butter.

“No thanks,” she said easily as she scooted out of the way, leaving Mike plenty of counter space to work. “You can just shove any of that out of the way,” she said, motioning down to the combs and spray bottle that was sitting there. “So, you’ve been spending more and more nights over there. Have you two talked about, maybe...moving in together?” she asked a little cautiously. Truth be told, her apartment really wasn’t the ideal situation for them, space wise. But she also really needed his part of the rent and utilities every month. If he was going to be moving out anytime soon, she needed to know so she could find someone else to rent his room. 

With a jar of peanut butter in one hand and grape jelly in the other, Mike turned all the way around to face Anna, a slightly shocked look on his face. “Moving in? We’ve only been dating a little more than two months, Anna. I can’t imagine… I mean, no, we haven’t talked about that, not even once. I mean, I know I’ve been staying there a lot, but I’m going to be home all weekend, and, well, I figure at some point he might want some space to himself, he’s not going to just keep inviting me to stay every night.” He made a face, his eyebrows pulling together like he was trying to figure out a six step math problem. “Like… is that what people do? Stay over every night, and then, it’s just like, hey, since you never go home, why don’t you just move in here? Is that how this is going to go? Oh my God, I hadn’t even thought about that. What if he thinks I’m trying to just move in on him?” Mike set both jars down on the counter and unbuttoned the cuffs of his flannel shirt. It was hot in the apartment all of a sudden.

“Wow, Mike,” Anna said, putting her hands up. “Just take it down a level and breathe. I wasn’t saying anything like that. I was just curious if you two had talked about it.” She dropped her hands to her side. “And yeah, it kind of usually goes that way. My last two roommates moved out that way. They just kept staying over at their boyfriend’s and then without warning it was, ‘Sorry, Anna, but I’m not paying rent this month. I’m moving in with _him_.’” She rolled her eyes. “And I’m not saying you’d leave me high and dry like that, but, well, rent’s expensive,” she stated, feeling the fluster in her words. She didn’t want to make this all about money, even though it kind of was. “If you decide to move out, I’m happy for you, of course. Just, give me some warning, okay?” 

“Yeah, yeah, okay,” Mike said, pulling off his shirt, wadding it up in a ball and tossing it into the living room, where it landed exactly where he wanted it to on the couch. “But that hasn’t even come up, so don’t worry about it. And I’d never just walk out on you, you know that.” He took a deep breath and looked right into Anna’s concerned face. “I couldn’t do that to you, not after you were so good to me, to offer up your place the way you did when I needed something so badly. I won’t just leave you in a shitty position, I know what that’s like.” 

She nodded as she smiled. “Good,” she said, “and it’s been a pleasure to have you as a roommate. You’ve been so much better than Tiffany and Stacy ever were.” She waited for a moment, her former roommates’ faces making an appearance in her mind before she sent them away with a huff. “So,” she said, pasting a smile back on her face, “you’re supposed to be spilling your guts about how things have been going. And since you haven’t been here for days, I have to assume things are more than good over at Chester’s bachelor pad.” 

Mike turned back to the counter, pulling open a drawer and grabbing a butter knife. “Yeah, things are good. Man, I don’t even know where to start.” He tore off a paper towel and laid it on the counter, then placed two slices of bread on top of that as he smiled. “One thing that’s pretty awesome is he _always_ has dinner ready when I get home from work. And I don’t mean ramen and sandwiches. Like, real, actual food. He’s a pretty badass cook. Which is good, since I can’t cook anything.” He slathered a thick layer of peanut butter on one slice of bread, then an equally thick layer of jelly on the other before slapping them together and putting the knife over in the sink. “And staying there is so great, he’s got an awesome view, I’m always wanting to draw or paint while I’m there… I just haven’t had a lot of time for that.”

Mike felt the blush start to creep over his cheeks as the implication of what he’d been doing with his free time hung in the air. He stepped over to the refrigerator and grabbed the milk as he shoved the jelly inside. Cold milk and a pb&j… perfectly indicative of his culinary skills that matched that of a ten year-old. 

“Let me tell you something, Mike,” Anna said as she watched him pour his glass of milk, “you’ve found a gold mine of a man. He’s handsome and sweet. Well off, and he not only knows how to cook, but willingly does it for you every night. Lucky,” she said with a playful hiss. “That’s all I can say. And what do you mean you haven’t had time to paint? What else are you guys doing every single night...oh,” she said, her brown eyes doubling in size. “Mike,” she gasped, her hand going to her mouth for a moment. “Did you? I mean, are you two….?”

Mike shoved his sandwich in his mouth right as Anna made the connection between his lack of time and his nighttime - or really anytime - activities. Activities that Chester was always ready for, even if dinner was ready and there was a possibility it could get cold. Luckily that had only happened once this week. Chester understood the importance of hot meals. 

Mike swallowed his bite and looked anywhere but at Anna. “Maybe…” 

Anna’s hands were waving in front of her. “Oh, Mike!” she said before she bum rushed him into a hug. “I’m so happy for you!” She held onto him for a second before she let him go, realizing it was a little awkward, despite their close friendship. “Sorry,” she muttered as she brushed off his shirt and took another step back. She felt her heart pumping as her mind ran wild. “Well, how was it? Everything you expected it to be?” 

“It was… well, I…” Mike looked down at his sandwich that he’d managed to hold out of the way as Anna attacked him. He didn’t know how to explain what it felt like to finally cross that threshold, especially after all the emotional hours that had come before it. There wasn’t any way to accurately describe how he felt about everything, and he blushed even deeper as he thought about how Chester’s body felt pressed against him, how he moved inside him, and how he made Mike feel things he’d never imagined. So he simply said, “it was perfect. It was better than I thought it could ever be. Chester is… um… well, let’s just say he knew exactly what he was doing.” 

It was hard for Anna to hold back the smile on her face as she held one finger to her lips, nibbling on her nail as she listened. As she watched Mike’s eyes shine with love. Love. _He’s finally in love._ She reached over, running a hand down his arm. “I’m so happy for you,” she said. “Look at you. You’re in love!” 

Snapping out of his recollections of the past few days, Mike glanced at Anna’s excited face and couldn’t help but smile back. “Yeah, I am. And you know, the best part, Anna? He’s in love with me, too. Can you believe that? He told me he loves me.” Just remembering that what he was saying was true lifted Mike’s spirits a little bit more. _He does love me. He’s said it over and over, and that’s the most important thing right now, even if he’s at… work… for the weekend. He loves me, and he’s coming back to me. Me. He’s mine._ “It’s been the best week,” he said, taking another bite of sandwich. 

“You always sell yourself short,” she said as she turned around and started to rearrange her supplies on the counter. “You’re a gold mine, too. Sweet, handsome, passionate, and loyal. He’s lucky to have you.” 

_Maybe,_ Mike thought as he finished off his dinner. _I still wonder what it is he sees in me sometimes._ “You know… I think he really could be the one, Anna. I know that’s crazy, and we haven’t been together that long, but there’s just something between us…” Mike swallowed hard, thinking about how truly perfect everything would be, without that pesky problem of Chester’s job. “I can’t explain it, but I just know, it has to work out for us, because I already can’t remember what it was like without him. And I don’t want to go back to that, whatever it was.”

He watched Anna finish moving things around and caught her sharp glance at him, but he went on without letting her talk. “Ready to get this done?” he asked, motioning to his hair. 

Anna pointed to the chair she’d already set up right under the lights. “Have a seat,” she instructed as she picked up her gloves and started to detangle them. “You know,” she said, “if and when you ever do move out, I’ll still do your hair for you.” She glanced over her shoulder, hitting Mike with a warm smile. 

“You are the best, you know that?” Mike moved to sit down, right as his phone vibrated in his pocket. “Oh, hang on. That’s probably Ches.” With a big smile, he pulled his phone from his jeans and looked down at the screen. 

**4:45 pm** _Miss you, too. I’d much rather be at home with you snuggled on the couch and eating something other than this questionable stuff that I think might be some sort of cauliflower. Cauliflower, Mike._

**4:46 pm** _Oh no. I know how much you hate that. Just scoot it to the side._ Mike smiled at his phone, thinking of the vegetables Chester hated as he slid into the chair, setting his phone down in front of him where he could see it. 

**4:48 pm** _But they’ve covered it in cheese! Cheese, Mike! The bastards tried to hide it under cheese, and I can’t get it separated from everything else! *sigh* Sorry. Trying not to freak out. Hope you’re doing better than me atm :)_

**4:50 pm** _Anna’s about to do my hair, so it will look good for you when you get back ;) Maybe just try eating the cauliflower, it might be fine with enough cheese. I miss you, babe :P_

**4:52 pm** _I’d almost be offended by that suggestion if I didn’t fuckin love you so much. And new sexy blue hair. I can’t wait. I’ll call you later tonight and we’ll finish this cauliflower debate._

**4:53 pm** _Can’t wait. Love you._

Mike leaned his head back and looked up at Anna. “I think he’s done now. There’s cauliflower, and that’s never good.” He didn’t explain any further, and Anna didn’t ask any more questions as he looked back at the table and closed his eyes, letting his mind drift to happy Chester places as he felt Anna’s hands in his hair. Everything else could wait. It was hair time. 

****

The rest of the weekend was a mix of traditional Saturday morning pancakes with Anna, a little bit of tv, some painting, some laundry, and catching up on sleep. By lunchtime on Sunday, Mike was feeling bored with the domesticity of the weekend, and anxious to get back to the loft. _Home. I want to go home to Chester._ Time crawled by slowly in the afternoon, until it was finally time to pack up his things and head out. He almost felt guilty to leave Anna alone again, but she’d acquired several new books on a Saturday afternoon hunt, and he knew as soon as he left she’d be in sweatpants with a cup of tea, and wouldn’t come out of her books until the next morning. 

Mike’s footsteps were light as he made his way down the hall toward Chester’s front door, keys in hand. His boyfriend would be home in an hour. It was just enough time for Mike to get his bag inside and safely out of sight, since he’d preemptively stuffed it with five days worth of clothes - just in case. Thankfully, with his minimalistic clothing tendencies, he could still get that many flannels inside the bag, but it looked ready to burst, and he didn’t want Chester to see how presumptive he was being. 

Even though he knew Chester wasn’t on the other side of the door, Mike was smiling as he put his key in the lock. _My key. I guess it really is my key now, Chester hasn’t asked for it back, and it makes sense for me to have it if I’ll be coming back on Sundays when he’s not here. Ugh. There I go assuming he’ll want me to come back next Sunday. One day at a time, Mike, you can’t just decide you’re living here._ He froze for a moment, thoughts of his conversation with Anna on Friday flooding through his mind. _This is what she was talking about, the way that happens, the moving in together. I have to make sure I leave her in a position to be okay. I can’t just walk out. IF that time comes._

The air inside the loft seemed a little stale when Mike stepped inside, immediately making his way to the kitchen and leaving his backpack in the same chair he’d left it in all week last week. _I should light a candle or something. Or open a window. Yeah, I’ll open some windows._

He got two windows raised and was standing, looking out over the view, when his phone vibrated. Mike reached in his pocket, a full out grin covering his face instantly.

“Hey, Ches, are you on your way?” he said by way of greeting. He spun around and looked at the tiny digital clock on the microwave.

Chester cleared his throat from the other end of the line. “Well, not yet,” he answered, his voice a little shakier than he’d intended. He knew Mike was probably already at the loft. Probably already waiting for him, and this was the worst phone call he could make. “It actually doesn’t look like I’ll be home tonight.” 

All of the excitement and happiness from moments earlier was sucked out of Mike’s body as he listened to the unexpected words come down the line. “Wait, why not?”

Chester let out a flustered sigh. “Because we… we didn’t get some things right yesterday and we tried to fix them this morning, but Mark’s pissed and he says we have to stay till we get it just the way he wants.” He clenched his fist as he looked toward the closed bedroom door. “He’s being an ass. I’m sorry, Mike.” 

Mike turned and pulled out Chester’s chair at the table, and sat down. “I don’t understand why you can’t come home. You’ve been there since Friday.” He stopped, questions flashing through his mind at lightning speed. “Can’t you just, I don’t know, go back in tomorrow if they need you?” He propped his elbow up on the table and rested his forehead in his hand.

“I wish,” Chester replied almost instantly. “He’s letting us get some dinner and take a break and then he’s going to have us get back at it. It’s...I can’t leave. I would, if I could. I miss you,” he added, before he said, “don’t be mad. I wanted to come home on time.” 

The scowl on Mike’s face deepened as he listened to Chester talk. “Back at it? Chester, have you…” He wanted to say, “have you been working this whole time?” but he knew Chester would be offended by his tone of voice,and even though he felt his outrage was justified, Mike knew better than to attack him that way right now. So instead he said, “you sound tired, babe. Have you had any rest?” 

Chester shook his head, a yawn escaping him just as Mike mentioned the word ‘tired’. “I’ll probably catch a few winks after I get some food in me. Are you already at the loft? You can stay there tonight, you don’t have to go all the way back to your apartment. I hate that you came over just to turn around and go back. This day sucks.” He sat back in the chair he’d been perched on, his eyes closing as he thought of home and Mike and how much he just wanted Mark to walk in and announce that everything was fine and they could all leave as scheduled. 

“There’s laws about working, Chester. They can’t just… make you work all the time. You have to have time off. I don’t get why you guys have to stay there all weekend. Regular people get to come home every night, you know.” Mike cringed as soon as the phrase “regular people” came out of his mouth, and he tried to correct his mistake. “That’s not what I meant, ‘regular people’... I meant… people in other industries get to go home every night.” He traced a circle onto the table top with his finger as he stared down at it, hoping maybe Chester would tell this Mark that it was break time and he was going home.

“Well, this isn’t those other industries,” Chester shot back, but he cursed himself a moment later. “Sorry,” he apologized quickly, rubbing his temple with two fingers. “It’s been a long day and my nerves are a little shot. We stay overnight because it’s easier. Filming takes a long time. There’s costume changes and rewrites and lighting issues.” He let all the air out of his lungs in one big gush. “It’s just one more day. I’ll be home tomorrow.” 

_Lighting issues. Costumes. Rewrites._ Mike looked across the loft at the painting he’d made for Chester as he thought about everything his boyfriend was saying. It sounded just like making any other movie, he imagined, except those actors got to go home. And Chester didn’t. It wasn’t fair. And the worst part was, he didn’t seem to think it was strange. It was like being held captive, in Mike’s opinion. Non-negotiable, binding contracts and closed locations… it just didn’t settle well in his mind. “At least tell me that you don’t have to share a room when you’re away,” Mike begged quietly as soon as the thought occurred to him.

Chester’s face brightened. Finally, a question he could answer that would make Mike happy and put his mind at ease. “Absolutely not,” he said, a smile crossing his lips. “We all have our own rooms here at the house. Well, the newer guys usually end up bunking, but I have my own room at this point.” 

“Tell me about your room,” Mike said stubbornly. Despite spending the weekend doing everything he could not to think about Chester at YRS, he was suddenly consumed by wanting to know where his boyfriend would be sleeping that night, while he was upstairs in their bed, alone.

“Well,” Chester said, a little slowly. He really hadn’t expected Mike to ask, but it seemed like a harmless request. Chester sat up a little straighter in his chair and looked around. “There’s a window that overlooks the pool. And a nice bed. Not like ours, but it’s soft. And a chair that I’m sitting in right now. What do you call them? It’s one of those with a really tall back. Hmmm… can’t think of it.” He let his eyes drift up to the ceiling as he tried find the proper name for the piece of furniture, but gave up. “And that’s it really. There’s a closet, but it’s small and aggravating.” 

Mike smiled for the first time since Chester called. “You _would_ worry about a small closet in a room you aren’t meant to stay in for more than a few days,” he said, trying to imagine the space a little clearer. “I miss you so much, Ches,” he whispered, his voice a little broken suddenly. “I don’t want to go upstairs without you. I spent all morning thinking about being together again, and tomorrow morning I’ll have to go to work… it will be dinner time before I see you again.”

Chester dropped his head. “I know. I’m sorry. But I can’t help it.” 

“I know. I’m sorry I keep complaining about it. It just sucks,” Mike concluded. There was nothing left to add, nothing that would make things better. The whole situation sucked. “I guess you probably have to go eat, huh?”

“Yeah, here in a few minutes. Brad said I had some time before it would be ready.” He placed his hand on is flat stomach. “I’m starving. Thankfully there’s no cauliflower tonight. Brad’s making us chicken noodle soup.” Chester smiled at the thought of the yellowy soup that he knew would be filled with fresh cooked carrots, bits of white chicken meat and flat noodles. He’d slurp up at least two bowl fulls and not care. 

“That sounds good,” Mike agreed. He had no plan for dinner, now that Chester wasn’t coming back. “I’ll probably eat a sandwich or something,” he said, feeling sorry for himself. “Or maybe just a bowl of cereal. Or a few bowls of cereal. Well, I probably shouldn’t do that, I’ll eat the whole box.”

“Okay,” Chester said, because he wasn’t sure what else to say. He knew Mike was disappointed, but at least they weren’t arguing, and he took that as a good sign. “Cereal isn’t really dinner food, but you know I’d never stop you from eating whatever you want. Whatever you’re craving.” 

“I’ll be home around four-thirty tomorrow,” Mike said, trying to bring the subject back around to happy thoughts of them being together again. “Maybe we can cook something together tomorrow night… I don’t know what I can do to help, but I’ll try my best not to burn anything if you’ll let me in the kitchen with you.” A little bit of a smile crossed his lips and he thought of how sexy Chester always looked in the kitchen. “Whatever it is will be better than cereal, though.” 

“Oh, I don’t know,” Chester said, purposely making his voice seem worried. “Letting you in the kitchen to actually cook. I’m not sure we’re ready for that kind of step in our relationship. That’s, like, major.” He smiled, waiting to hear Mike’s comeback. 

Mike giggled just a bit, picturing the mock expression of fear on his boyfriend’s face. “Come on, now, it’s not like we’re moving in together or anything. I’m just asking if you’ll let me chop an onion or something,” he said playfully. 

“Mike, I love you, and because of that I’m not sure I feel comfortable with you using the knives,” Chester teased back. “Can’t have you losing a finger. It would ruin the entire meal!” 

“Yeah, I kinda need all my fingers to do my job.” Mike wiggled the fingers of his right hand out in front of him, and thought about his keyboard at his apartment. He wished he had it with him, that would pass some time this evening. “Man, I wish I had a piano over here, I could get some practice time in tonight for sure. I guess I’ll just have to watch some movies in bed or something.” 

“A piano?” Chester repeated as he stood up and walked over to the window, looking down at the pool area and the half a dozen people that were there - some in lounge chairs, some in the water. “Are those expensive? Do you think we have room for one? If we get one, you could play stuff for me,” Chester suggested as he imagined something small that could fit somewhere in the downstairs part of the loft. Maye up against a wall. He’d only heard Mike play once since they’d been dating, and he’d love to hear it more often. “You could play and I’d make you laugh by singing along. And just think of Christmas,” he added, something bright popping across his face as he turned away from the hot weather outside. “Christmas carols and all the holiday crap. It could be fun.” 

_Christmas. He’s already planning for Christmas._ Mike smiled. “Well, the keyboard I have wasn’t cheap, but it’s not as expensive as an upright,” he said, addressing Chester’s first question. “And an upright is not as expensive as a grand… not that there would be room for a grand, anyway.” He stood up and walked toward the living area, surveying the space. “I’d love to play for you, Ches, and Christmas carols are the best. And you know, if I’m ever going to go get my degree, I’ll need to be able to practice more. You’d probably get tired of hearing it.” He dropped his head for a moment, thinking. “I could always do all the tedious stuff on the weekends, when you aren’t here.” 

Mike hated admitting that this weekend separation was long term, that it could stretch into Christmas time and beyond, but he still couldn’t see a way out of Chester’s job in the foreseeable future. He also couldn’t imagine actually scraping enough money together to have a real upright piano either, though. It was all just a fantasy, a thought of what could be, someday.

Chester went to say something, to reassure Mike that he wouldn’t get tired of it, and if he ever did, he’d have no problem saying so, but he didn’t get to. There was a light knock on his bedroom door, and he looked over just in time to see Ryan poke his head in and mouth the word, ‘food’ as he waved. Chester nodded as he headed toward the door. “Hey, Sexy Boy, I gotta go,” he said, shooing Ryan away from the doorway. He didn’t want Mike to know that anyone had interrupted them, and he really wasn’t going to mention Ryan’s name, which seemed to be a trigger for Mike for some reason. “It’s time to eat,” he said, already licking his lips. “I’ll miss you tonight. I’ll call you in the morning before you go to work, if that’s okay?” 

Mike nodded as he said, “yeah, call me in the morning. And I’ll miss you too. I’ll have your pillow to keep me company, it’s almost as good as you, nice and soft but not as warm,” he said, looking upstairs. “I’ll talk to you in the morning… I love you.”

“I love you, too,” Chester assured him before he made a kissing sound into the phone. “I hope you sleep well. Goodnight, Mike.” 

“‘Night, Ches,” he said, pressing end on the call. He stood there in the middle of the living room for a few minutes, the playful ending of their conversation fading away, being replaced by loneliness. _This is why I went home Friday. It’s not the same here without him._

He walked over to the couch and sat down, then decided to stretch out and lay down for just a minute, planning out the rest of his now empty evening. There was plenty of time to just take it slow. Dinner, and a shower next. _I’ll use all of Chester’s stuff,_ he thought, smiling for a second. _I’ll smell like him, I’ll smell him when I go to bed._ He figured he’d sit at the table and draw for a bit, and try to relax. Then a movie, and then sleep. He tried to convince himself it wouldn’t be horrible, he’d go to bed early, get up and go teach, and then Chester would be home.

_Surely he’ll be home tomorrow. He has to come home. They can’t keep him there forever._

Mike looked down at his phone, and made a face at the blank screen before he slid it open and tapped his photo app. He turned the camera around and snapped a shot of his face, his freshly dyed blue hair, and placed a little heart emoji in the corner of the picture. Even though he knew his boyfriend was busy, he opened their message thread and attached the little selfie, and pressed send. It was as close as he was going to get to seeing Chester tonight, and it was going to have to be enough. Then he closed the phone and sat up, placing it on the coffee table before he got back up and went to the kitchen, where his cereal, his not-quite dinner food, was waiting. 

****

TBC


	16. More Than Colleagues

Sunday evenings had become sacred time to Mike, and he was already humming when he stepped into the bedroom, his blue hair damp from his shower and the towel slung low on his hips. Over the past few months he and Chester had slipped into a routine, a comfortable reacclimation into their private life together when Chester came home from work. Mike knew the first thing Chester would do is dump all of the contents of his bag into the hamper, then he’d take a shower. 

They would order takeout if Mike hadn’t already decided what he wanted for dinner, and they would carefully avoid the topic of how Chester’s weekend had been, because they had learned early on that one of two things would happen. Either Mike would clam up, unable to hear anymore about his boyfriend’s weekend shooting porn, or it would end in Mike begging Chester yet again to quit. It wasn’t a good way to ease back into each other.

Mike had also learned, early on, that Chester really meant it when he said work sex and their lovemaking were two completely different realms in his head, and after a good meal and a shower, he wanted nothing more than to get naked and reclaim their relationship. But for Mike, it just wasn’t that easy. It was one more thing they argued about.

So now, the routine was dinner, then a movie, some cuddling, and usually Chester would ask Mike about the weekend, how Anna was, and what he’d been doing. By the time they headed for bed, the ball of anxiety and tension in Mike’s stomach had loosened enough to allow a degree of intimacy, but never sex. Never on Sunday.

He sighed, dropping the towel on the floor and reaching for his underwear and pajama bottoms. He knew it made Chester insane, the waiting, his lack of ability to just let it all fade into the background. They had argued about it more than once, but Mike had a hard time making sense of his feelings about everything. Tugging on his white t-shirt, he sat down on the bed and ran his hands over their blanket.

_Six months. And everything would be perfect, if Chester didn’t have to leave every weekend. If I could just let it go. If I could pretend he was doing anything else while he was away from me. If I could just trust him completely, the way he’s been asking me to. I don’t know why I can’t just let go._ The blanket was soft, inviting, and Mike bit his lip as he sat there, thinking. Chester was due home any minute, and he wanted to try this time… try again, to surrender himself over to the Mike he knew he would be tomorrow morning, after they’d slept together in their bed, after there was a buffer of one night’s sleep between Chester’s work life and his personal life. _I’m really going to try not to let it come between us tonight. I don’t want to argue, and he’s right. We can’t go our whole lives never making love on Sunday._

Downstairs, Chester had just stepped in the door. He shut and locked it behind him. “Mike!” he called immediately when he didn’t see his boyfriend within eyeshot. They’d already been texting that morning, and the plan was just like always - to meet up here, at their homebase, for a relaxed evening to soak back into each other. 

Chester headed for the kitchen, his eyes ghosting over the stack of mail that was sitting on the bar. He wouldn’t touch it tonight. Bills and cards and junk mail could wait till tomorrow when Mike was gone to work and Chester was ambling around the loft reacquainting himself to his space. He let out a sigh as he glanced up at the bedroom. He had to figure Mike was up there, since the light was on. _I hope he’s in a good mood. He seemed to be earlier. I’m so hungry. We need to order pizza._

He headed for the bathroom, figuring Mike would be down any minute. He flipped on the light, and the leftover steam from Mike’s recent shower hit him. He smiled. Now he knew why Mike wasn’t downstairs just yet. Chester let out a yawn as he sat his bags down and rubbed his face. He needed to pee. He needed to go upstairs and get clean clothes and shower. Mike could order the pizza. _And then we can crash on the couch. He can tell me all about his day. His weekend._ The corners of Chester’s mouth pulled down. The last forty-eight hours at YRS had been dramatic. There had been arguments and one of his co-workers had slipped out by the pool and ended up in the emergency room to get twelve stitches in his head. Jason and Mark had been on edge all weekend for reasons Chester didn’t know, but it had left everyone frazzled. 

His shoulders slumped as he stared at the dark floor of the bathroom. _Mike won’t want to hear about any of that. He doesn’t care. It upsets him. I guess maybe it doesn’t matter._ He shook his head and the thoughts away as he turned around and shut the bathroom door. He and Mike were practically living together, but he still liked to pee in privacy. 

As soon as he heard the door, and Chester calling his name, Mike took a deep breath. _I’m fine. And I’m really, really going to try hard tonight. I love him so much._ He stood up and started for the stairs. _I have to keep that in front of everything else. I love him. And he loves me. And he won’t be doing this forever._ Mike shook his head. _Damn, even when I try, thoughts about it are still there._

He came down the stairs just in time to see Chester close the bathroom door. That was fine, it gave him another minute to replace whatever expression he had on his face that Chester was sure to hate with a smile. A genuine one. He _was_ happy that his boyfriend was home, where he belonged.

Chester finished washing his hands, his nostrils inhaling the scent of the peach soap he loved so much. He dried them off before he spun around and opened the door. His lips instantly pulled to a smile. “Hey, Sexy Boy,” he swooned as he floated across the floor, right up to Mike. “God, you’re a sight for sore eyes,” he purred as he wrapped his arms around his boyfriend’s neck, connecting their lips instantly. Mike. He always tasted so good. So pure and fully his. It was a feeling Chester knew he could never explain to anyone, but there was no one else like Mike Shinoda. 

The first kiss after a weekend apart always felt like the first kiss all over again to Mike. He couldn’t argue with the way his body responded to Chester’s soft lips and barely restrained passion. It always sent his mind to a peacefully blank place, where there was nothing to argue about, only the feel of Chester’s arms around him and the press of their bodies together. This Sunday, he didn’t back away first. This time, he chased Chester’s kiss with another, pulling him closer, trying to hold on to that perfect feeling. He let Chester pull away first this time before he fanned his fingers out over his boyfriend’s back and enjoyed the warmth of his body, mumbling into his neck, “I missed you, Ches.”

Everything from Chester’s toes to his head jumped with relief. “I missed you, too,” he responded almost on impulse. He kissed the side of Mike’s face before he took a proper step back. Mike was in his pajamas, and his blue hair was in that just-right stage of still a little damp and not at all styled. It was a signal that his boyfriend was comfortable, and that he wasn’t going anywhere. Mike would be here all night. “Love this,” Chester smirked as he reached to tossle Mike’s hair. “I think you should keep it like that all the time.” 

Mike soaked up the feel of Chester’s hand in his hair and smiled, watching the way Chester’s lips moved around his lip ring as he talked. It was something he missed a lot when they weren’t together. “You know I can’t go out like this, any more than you can go out without your hair done,” he said, turning to look at the kitchen. “You hungry, babe?” 

“Ugh, starving,” Chester said, his hand landing on his flat stomach. “We didn’t get breakfast this morning because Brad came down with something. The flu or a cold, I don’t know but he wouldn’t go near the kitchen and -” Chester stopped. He saw the look on Mike’s face as it was slowly shifting to something uneasy. Chester cleared his throat. “Anyway,” he said with a shrug. “How about pizza? I could go for something incredibly cheesy. And _saucy_ ,” he said, putting a little extra emphasis on his last word with a raise of his eyebrow. 

“One extra saucy, extra cheesy, no mushroom supreme pizza coming your way,” Mike said, trying to keep his voice light as he fumbled for his phone on the bar. _He saw you make a face, you are literally the worst, Mike. So much for trying tonight._ “Want some cheesy bread, too? I’ll get it all ordered while you go shower.” It almost sounded like an order - go shower, or else - but Mike hoped Chester wouldn’t hear it that way. It was part of the routine. Come home, go shower. He peeked at Chester from the corner of his eyes. 

“Yes,” Chester answered, his hand rubbing over his empty stomach. “And, they have the dessert pizzas, too, don’t they? Like with apples or cherries or something? Let’s get whatever that is, too. If they have them.” He scratched his head. He wasn’t sure. They ordered a lot of takeout and there was no lack of pizza places in their area, and it was easy to get them confused. He just wanted food. 

“Mmm, they have one with chocolate chips, too.” Mike was relieved Chester didn’t react to his shower order. “But, apples are good, too, they put that icing on there that you like.” He watched Chester nod his head for apples and icing, so dessert was determined. “Okay, I’ll make it happen.” Mike paused for a moment, then stepped back toward Chester, quickly kissing him on the cheek. “We could always have our dessert in bed… later…” He let the end of his sentence linger suggestively and he closed his eyes, his heart racing. _There. I said it. I put it out there, on a Sunday. I hope he understands how hard that was for me._

“Okay,” Chester agreed easily. “You know I’m always good to let you eat wherever you want. And, uh, it will save us some time,” he offered back as he ran a finger down Mike’s arm. “You’re the boss,” he whispered, “we can do whatever you want later.” He pecked his boyfriend on the cheek, before he added that he really needed a shower and that his stomach was literally eating itself. He trotted up the stairs, his bags in hand. _I wonder if he was suggesting sex later? But it’s Sunday. He never wants to do that on Sunday. I don’t know. Whatever he meant, I’ll let him make the moves. Last time I tried something on a Sunday it ended in a fight. I love him but I hate arguing with him. Damn his puppy dog eyes. He always makes me feel so fuckin’ guilty._ He let out a sigh as he moved his thoughts to something else. 

_It’s good to be home. I love being home. I love being here with Mike. We need to make a plan for the week. We should go bowling one day. He kicked my ass last time and I need to get him back for that._ Chester was already half dancing and half throwing himself a small fashion show as he searched through his closet, all thoughts of fights and arguments gone as he picked out what he was going to wear after his shower. 

He’d selected a simple black t-shirt and some red and black pajama bottoms with socks and underwear to match, which took longer than he figured. But now he was ready. He was ready to get clean and to eat and snuggle on the couch. He made his way downstairs, his clothes over his arm as he heard Mike on the phone, debating pizza toppings and dessert options with the pizza place. Chester smiled. It was going to be a good night. He could feel it. 

He slipped into the bathroom, shutting the door behind him. 

Mike heard the door close just as he finished the order. _Oh, well, it’s fine that way. He’s always so relaxed when he gets out of the shower. I can’t believe this pizza is going to take an hour to get here. That’s criminal._ He chewed on his bottom lip anxiously. _Maybe I should find us a snack. Or maybe I can just distract him… and myself in the process._

He looked at the couch, then back at the closed bathroom door, where he could already hear the shower running. Even if Chester took his standard twenty minutes in the bathroom, that still left forty until the pizza showed up. That was enough time to fool around a little bit, since Mike was determined he was going to get past that hurdle tonight. Chester was always willing, and had been vocal about his disappointments on Sunday nights past. All it would take to send a clear message was something simple. Something like…

He reached behind his neck and yanked on the collar of his shirt, pulling it off and dropping it on the coffee table. _If being shirtless in the living room isn’t a clear signal, I don’t know what else is._ Feeling a little naughty, Mike went into the kitchen and pulled out two glasses, filling them with ice and water and bringing them back to the coffee table to wait with him. His hand was a little bit damp from the condensation, and he pulled it down his chest and across his stomach, closing his eyes for a minute. _Hurry up, Ches, hurry before I get inside my own head and change my mind._

In the bathroom, Chester wiped his hand across the mirror, so he could see himself. He took his time, brushing his teeth and combing out his flat, damp mohawk. He made sure he slapped on some deodorant, just in case their snuggling on the couch did turn into a little bit more. He tugged his shirt on and adjusted his cotton pajama bottoms before he decided he was done. There was always a feeling of accomplishment after his shower routine, and he flashed himself a smile in the fogged over mirror before he opened the door, flipped the light off and stepped into the living room area. 

The cooler air of the apartment smacked his skin as he instinctively looked toward the kitchen - but it was empty. He swung around, ready to ask how long the pizza was going to be, but he stopped. His mouth was already open, and now his eyes were lost on the sight of his boyfriend sitting on the couch with his shirt off. Chester soaked up the image of Mike’s exposed tan skin, the shape of his neck and shoulders and the freckles that lived there. “Mike,” he said, his mouth finally working. “What, what are you doing?” He was already moving toward the couch before his lover could answer him. 

“Pizza’s gonna be awhile,” Mike answered, his voice soft as he held out a hand for Chester to take. “I thought of a way to pass the time, though. I mean, if you’re interested.” He looked up, trying to make his gaze seductive as he rolled his lips together and wet them with the tip of his tongue. 

Chester’s pulse was racing. Mike never came downstairs without his shirt on. Or if he did, it was only in the pitchblack, middle of the night when he had to pee. But this. This never happened. At least not unless some sort of sexual act was going on. Clothes naturally got shed as lips and limbs went wild with hormones, but this...this was a sober, pre-sex decision from his boyfriend, and Chester was on the edge of glee. “You act like you have to ask,” he said, before he pounced forward, tackling Mike onto the couch. His hands went everywhere, over every inch of skin he could get to as they kissed sparatically with passion and need. As Chester smothered Mike’s upper body with wet licks, nips, and kisses. It was Sunday and they were going to have sex. Chester had no desire to pick that apart and wonder why. He was just happy it was finally happening. 

Mike let himself get lost in the moment, clutching at Chester’s back and his ass as his boyfriend kissed every bit of naked skin he had on display. He turned off his thoughts and let his body have what it wanted, leaning his head back onto the arm of the couch as Chester pressed his hips down and slid his lips down Mike’s neck. He could feel the immediate arousal that came on strong between them as their hidden dicks bumped against each other. There was nothing to think about but how desperately he wanted Chester, wanted to put everything else aside and behind them and show him how much he loved him, try to make up for being such a disaster every Sunday night for so long. “Ches… fuck,” he moaned as he pulled Chester’s hips down into his again. “I want you so much.” 

He slid one hand around to go between them, to find and squeeze Chester’s dick in his hand for a moment. “I don’t want to wait until tomorrow.”

Chester’s brain was off. The feel of Mike’s body under him, the way they were dry humping each other like teenagers - it was glorious. It was raw. And as he felt Mike’s hand grope at the front of his pajama bottoms, Chester’s eyes shot open, his dick going a hundred times harder. “Fuuuck,” he hissed, right into Mike’s ear. “Yes,” he added as Mike’s hand had managed to get a fair hold on him, despite the clothing barrier. “Mikey,” he hummed as he bucked his hips, loving the pressure. Loving that Mike was the one running things. Loving that this wasn’t their typical Sunday routine. He wanted this to go further. He wanted to get his clothes off to make all this easier. He wanted them to shove the coffee table out of the way and get on the floor, with the plush white rug under them so they could have plenty of room to properly indulge in each other. 

Chester lifted his body up, steadying his weight on his arms as he looked into Mike’s eyes. “I have on way too many clothes. And you do, too,” he added before he let his tongue lick over Mike’s swollen lips. “I vote we take it all up a notch.” He went to climb off his boyfriend so they could really let things heat up, but his balance didn’t stay with him, and in one awkward movement, he tumbled off of Mike and off the couch. His bottom smacked the floor with a thud as he barely missed hitting his head against the coffee table. 

“Damn, babe, are you okay?” Mike leaned over the side of the couch breathlessly, his heart pounding. As soon as he saw the stunned, but quite okay, look on his boyfriend’s face, he grinned down at him. “Oh, I see. You just want me to come down there, don’t you?” 

Chester’s ass hurt as he sat there, trying to regain his pride. “Actually, yes,” he answered, letting himself smile and then laugh at the whole thing. “Not exactly the way I planned it, but it gets us to the same place. We need to move the stupid the coffee table though.” He glared at the piece of furniture for a second, like it had committed some sort of crime. 

As Mike was making a move to stand up, another witty comment about to follow, the doorbell rang. He paused, his eyebrows furrowing together. _It hasn’t been an hour yet. Has it?_ “Fuck. I think that’s the pizza. Why don’t you get busy moving that coffee table while I get the door? We can eat cold pizza later.” He winked down at his boyfriend as he stepped over him, reaching down to adjust his hard on as he made his way to the door. Good thing he’d already paid for the pizza when he called it in, he didn’t feel like wasting time with his wallet.

Without even looking through the peephole, Mike opened the door. And stood there, confused. The dark haired man on the other side of the door wasn’t holding two steaming pizza boxes and a smaller box of cheesy bread. He wasn’t holding anything except onto the door frame. Out of surprise, Mike took a small step back as he said, “oh, hey man, I think you’ve got the wrong apartment.” 

The man’s body swayed a little as his eyes narrowed. “No,” he said, looking past Mike’s shoulder to the kitchen area. “I’m here for Chester,” he stated, taking a step forward. “He’s here, right? He told me he was coming home.” 

Without thinking, Mike’s hand shot out to the door frame, blocking the man’s entrance. “Chester? Yeah, he’s here.” Mike barely turned his head to the side and called over his shoulder, “Chester? The door is for you.” He didn’t move, didn’t invite this man inside, and he felt the prickle of apprehension on the back of his neck, which suddenly called into focus the fact that he was standing in the doorway without his shirt on. The whole situation was tense and uncomfortable.

Chester was bent over the coffee table, getting ready to shove it off the rug and over by the windows, when he heard Mike calling him. He stood up straight as he turned around. “Who on earth would be here?” he asked as he took a few deep breaths before he headed to meet Mike by the door. The fall to the floor had helped deflate his arousal from earlier, so by the time he saw who was interrupting their private party, his logical, thinking brain was back in control. “Oh,” he said, “Ryan? What are you doing here? What’s wrong?” he asked as he stepped up beside Mike, the faint thought that Mike had no idea who Ryan was crossed his mind. 

The taller, lanky man again tried to step forward. “Let me in,” he begged, his eyes bouncing between lidded and wide opened. “Tell your gatekeeper to back off.” 

The instant Mike heard Chester say “Ryan” his heart sank. _What in the hell is this guy doing here, showing up at our door like this? Nothing about this says work and personal life separation._ Mike stood his ground, his hand firmly in place on the door frame, keeping Ryan on the other side. A touch of anger flared up in his chest. He was forbidden to even _think_ about asking to go to YRS, he and Chester had argued about it enough early on that they’d had to agree not to speak of it again. Yet here was one of Chester’s _partners_ \- Mike’s mind spit the word out in his head - standing at the door of their home asking to be let in. How dare he even think for a moment Chester would let him inside. “So you’re Ryan,” Mike said, not able to hide the acidity in his voice. “I think you’re in the wrong place, man.”

Ryan tilted his head, his focus going from Chester to the human blockade between him and his co-worker. “Yeah, I’m Ryan. Who the hell are you? Chaz, tell him to let me in,” he begged again. “I gotta pee, man, and you know how much I love your bathroom,” he slurred, his lips popping into a smile. 

Chester let out a sigh, his empty stomach feeling sick. “Mike,” he said, resting his hand on his boyfriend’s shoulder, “this is Ryan, from work.” He was pretty sure his introduction was way too late, but he felt it was needed. “Ry, this is Mike Shinoda. My boyfriend,” he added, knowing Mike would read all kinds of wrong things into it if he didn’t. It was in that moment, as Ryan tried to push forward again that Chester caught a whiff of his breath. “Are you drunk?” he asked, pulling at Mike’s arm to get him to let his guard down. “It’s okay,” he whispered back to Mike. “He can come in for a minute. I don’t want him in the hallway drunk.” 

Mike looked at Chester, feeling like he’d been slapped. _He’s just going to let him in here? And it’s not the first time! And he’s drunk!_ He almost argued and stood his ground, but the pleading look in Chester’s eyes made him drop his arm and take a step back. He knew Chester was probably right, that having him drunk in the hallway could end poorly. Without saying a word, Mike spun on his heel and walked over to the coffee table, picking up his t-shirt and pulling it over his head. Then he just stood there, waiting, watching.

Chester shut the door as Ryan took a few unsteady steps in, his eyes landing on Mike, and he smiled. “So that’s your man candy, huh, Chazzy?” he giggled, slapping Chester on the arm. “He’s cute! I like his hair,” he mumbled. 

“Yeah, he is cute,” Chester agreed. “Ryan, what are you doing here?” he asked, his eyes flipping nervously between his co-worker and his boyfriend. Of all nights that Ryan could show up drunk he’d have to pick tonight. Tonight when he and Mike were about to go crazy on each other on the floor and eat pizza and dessert pizza and all the cheese and in bed, and Chester’s mind was about to scream. “Ryan?” he asked again, his voice going a little deeper as he waited for an answer. 

Ryan shook his head. “I...I had some drinks after work,” he said, his hand going over his greasy black hair. “It’s hot in here,” he muttered as he peeled his black leather jacket off. He walked over to the kitchen table and slapped it over the back of one of the chairs. “Wait,” he said, holding one finger out toward Chester, who had followed and was only a step away. “I have to pee,” he stated, his voice comically awkward. “And then we can talk about it.” He turned around, and headed for the bathroom. 

Mike watched as Ryan moved around the loft as though he’d been there several times. He was comfortable, even though he was drunk, and Mike knew he was just standing in the middle of the living room with his mouth slightly open, watching all of this happen in total disbelief. “Chester,” he hissed, trying not to be overheard. “What is happening? What’s he doing here? How does he even know where you live?”

Chester was already headed Mike’s way. This was bad, and he knew it. “I’m sorry,” he said automatically. “I don’t know why he’s here.” He let out a flustered sigh. “He’s been here a few times,” he admitted, not looking Mike in the eye, as he kept his focus on the coffee table they probably wouldn’t be moving now. Damn Ryan. “Just for social stuff,” he added. “I told you he was my friend. But I had no idea he was coming over here tonight. I just saw him a few hours ago and he was fine, so I have no clue what brought all this on.” He swung his attention toward the closed bathroom door, mentally ordering his co-worker to hurry the hell up. 

Before Mike could launch into the litany of questions he had, the bathroom door opened and Ryan stepped out, a wide grin on his face as he caught Mike’s eyes. Mike scowled at him in return, ordering himself to keep his mouth shut and not start anything.

Ryan stood there for a moment, looking at Chester and Mike. He wasn’t sure, but he didn’t think Chester’s boyfriend liked him too much. “Chaz,” he said, as he walked over to them, and in one drunk movement, he slipped by them to slump onto the couch. “Sit with me,” he said, patting the cushion beside him. “Because, man, it happened again.” His expression changed, his intoxicated eyes softening. “He did it again.” 

“Damn,” Chester breathed, his impulse was to go sit with his friend, but he stopped. He looked to Mike, running his fingers lightly down his arm before he linked their hands. Chester waited a second, squeezing Mike’s hand before he let go with a sigh, and sat down on the couch next Ryan. “What happened this time?” 

Ryan sat back, his eyes staring up at the ceiling. “Same shit as always. Well, you know how it is,” he said, flipping his hand through the air, and when it came down, it landed on Chester’s leg, where it stayed. “He told me we were meeting up tonight and then, of course, Mark had to make some big plans or gave him some reason and he didn’t even bother to fuckin’ call.” Ryan’s hand clamped onto Chester’s leg as he closed his eyes. “So then I decided to get a fuckin’ drink.” 

Mike’s eyes zeroed in on the way Ryan’s hand was so casually draped on Chester’s thigh, and he felt his heart beating hard. He couldn’t tear his gaze away, his mind quickly conjuring up unwelcome thoughts of that same hand, touching _his_ boyfriend in other places. More intimate places. There were all kinds of thoughts popping through his head. Nicknames. They had nicknames for each other. Did they kiss? Was kissing part of what they had to do on camera? How had he never asked that question. _Because I don’t want to know! That’s why!_ Had they ever kissed off camera? How did he know Chester was telling him the truth, that Ryan had only been there for social reasons. His stomach turned suddenly as another thought flashed through his mind - _please, please tell me he’s never been in our bed._

It was too much. Mike picked up his untouched glass from the coffee table and took it to the kitchen table, sitting down in his chair. He could still hear their conversation, but it felt like it was happening in some other realm. Mike’s hands were sweaty and he felt sick. He needed Ryan to leave.

Chester watched as Mike left. He twisted his head around to follow every step his boyfriend took before he settled his attention back on Ryan. “Look, man, you know getting drunk isn’t going to help anything,” he said as he picked Ryan’s hand up off his leg and gave it back to him. “You know how he is...I don’t get why you waste your time, honestly.” 

Ryan rolled his head, his bloodshot eyes staring Chester in the face. “Maybe you’re right,” he said, his words and tone sounding off. “Guess I should find someone else.” His hand reached out, his fingers gracing over Chester’s face. 

“Ry, don’t,” Chester said immediately as he pulled back, his head instantly snapping toward the kitchen, his heart pounding. “Look, you need to go home and sleep this off. You don’t even know what you’re saying anymore.” He went to get up, and he had to smack Ryan’s hand away as his co-worker tried to grope at his front. “I’m going to call you a ride to take you home,” Chester insisted, and that was all it took. Ryan nodded, his eyes already shut as he let his head fall back onto the couch. 

Chester let out an aggravated humph as he headed for the kitchen, his phone already out as he scrolled through his contacts. He kept his favorite Uber service handy for occasions like this. He leaned against the counter, his back to the living room area as he quickly called in his address. 

The familiar touch of Ryan’s fingers to _his_ boyfriend’s face, the way _his_ lover, _his_ Chester, said “Ry”, shred Mike’s heart into pieces. He couldn’t unsee that touch, even though Chester had pulled away. Even though he’d said no. It didn’t matter. In that one touch was all the reasons Mike wanted so desperately for Chester to quit YRS. It didn’t matter that Chester was adamant that sex and love were two different things to him. That one soft touch said everything. No matter what they called it, Chester was still being intimate with someone else. Someone that wasn’t him. The reality of it slammed into Mike’s chest and left him unable to breathe. It hurt, more than he thought possible. Until that moment, everything had been imagined, but now… now Mike had a face, a voice, a hand to go with the person Chester was with when he was away. And Mike knew he wouldn’t stop seeing that touch replaying in his head. A stupid, simple, drunken caress.

Chester hung up his phone. He absently sat it on the counter as he looked across the loft. Ryan’s head was back, and even though Chester was far away, he was already guessing that his co-worker was passing in and out of consciousness. _He needs to stay awake long enough to get home._ He turned, looking over the kitchen. They didn’t have any coffee made, and there wouldn’t be time for that anyway. His shoulders slumped in defeat as his gaze settled on Mike, who had his back to him. “Hey,” he called softly as he walked over and stood next to his boyfriend. He put his hand on Mike’s shoulder, keeping his touch light. “I called a ride for him. I’m sorry. He’ll be out of here in just a few minutes.” 

Chester’s hand felt like a weight on his shoulder. Mike nodded, looking down into the top of his glass. He knew better than to trust his voice right then. He was scared of what he might say anyway. 

“Pizza should be here soon,” Chester offered next when Mike didn’t say anything. The silent treatment. God, how he hated that. “We can still eat and watch a movie. I know he ruined the evening, but he’s...all messed up. It’s stupid.” 

Mike felt his throat constrict as his eye watered a bit. _Ruined. Yeah, he ruined everything._ Closing his eyes, he pinched the bridge of his nose between his thumb and his pointer finger, and sucked in a slow breath. “I’m not sure I’m still hungry,” he said, his voice coming out hollow. 

Chester pulled his hand away from Mike’s shoulder as he wrapped his arms around himself. _Fuck. Since when is Mike Shinoda not hungry? Dammit. Dammit._ His nostrils flared as he headed for the couch. He picked up his untouched glass of water that Mike had poured him and held it out to his co-worker. “Ryan!” he barked, his voice stern. “Wake up and drink this,” he ordered as he watched his friend slowly open his eyes and start to sit up. “Your ride will be here any minute and I’m not fuckin’ carrrying you downstairs.” Chester felt his teeth clench as Ryan took the cup of water and started to sip it. He didn’t want to be mad, but all of this was beyond fucked up, and he hated it. He bolted his eyes back across the loft, catching Mike’s still uneasy expression. 

Another tense minute passed before the doorbell rang. Slowly Mike stood up and went to the door. He didn’t care about pizza anymore. He wanted Ryan out. He wanted to ask Chester all the questions in his head. He wanted to scream at him. He wanted to cry. He wanted to do anything but eat. The pizza was handed off in a nearly wordless exchange, and Mike took it back to the kitchen table, setting it down in the center and sitting back down in his chair to wait. He avoided looking at Chester. 

The food smelled incredible, and despite the evening’s turn of events, Chester was still starving. He’d barely eaten all day, and since he knew it would be another few minutes before Ryan’s ride showed up, he figured food could only help. “Ry,” he said, looking down at his co-worker, who was now sitting forward on the couch, nursing his cup of water, “you want a slice of pizza? Might sober you up a bit.” 

Ryan looked up, his brown eyes wet from where he’d just wiped them as he nodded. “I’m sorry, Chester,” he said, softly, his hand going out and reaching for contact. “I didn’t mean to spoil your night.” With Chester’s hand in his own, he glanced over his shoulder, catching a blurry vision of Mike. “He really is cute,” he said, a sappy grin crossing his drunken features. “I bet he loves you to pieces.” 

Chester smiled. “Yeah, he does,” he agreed. “And I love him.” He squeezed Ryan’s hand before he pulled away and headed for the pizza boxes. He’d grab Ryan a slice, and maybe by the time he got it down, his ride would be here and he’d be sober enough to get home safely. 

Mike watched Chester lift a slice of pizza from the box and take it to Ryan. _It’s not enough he’s here, ruining everything, he’s got to eat my dinner, too. Nice._ He sat back in his chair and crossed his arms, his mood going from heart broken back to angry in seconds. _This ride needs to hurry the fuck up._

Chester stood for a moment, watching his friend nibble at the hot piece of pizza before he checked his watch. _Now I could use a drink. Mike’s so pissed. I should have introduced them before this. I should have...but he never wanted to hear. How could I introduce them if he didn’t even want me to talk about anything at work?_ Chester’s head dropped, and for a moment he thought about sitting down next to Ryan. Sitting down next to someone who wasn’t hating him at the moment. 

But that would make it worse, and he knew it. Instead he took a deep breath and headed back to the kitchen. He got down a plate and got a new glass of water before he sat down at the table with Mike. He selected his piece of pizza and some cheesy bread, and he kept his eyes down as he ate. Filling his empty stomach was easier than anything else at the moment. 

He ate his food quickly, trying his hardest to make the minutes pass. By the time he was on his second slice, his phone jingled with a notification. He glanced at it before he stood up. “Ryan, your ride is here,” he announced as he wiped his hands off on his napkin, grabbed Ryan’s discarded leather jacket, and headed across the loft. “Come on,” he ordered, motioning for his co-worker to stand up. It took a try or two, but eventually, Ryan was on his feet. He wavered, and Chester was quick to put an arm around his waist as he walked him toward the door. 

“Chaz,” Ryan said, leaning on his friend, “I might throw up.” 

“Yeah, save that for your own house,” Chester muttered as they got to the front door. Chester’s first thought was to send Ryan on his way so he could get back to Mike, but as his friend stumbled, and as Chester had to catch him from falling, he knew that was out. “Mike!” he called over his shoulder, “I’m going to walk him down. I’ll be right back.” He didn’t wait for permission. He just wanted this part of the evening to be over. He opened the door, and out he went with Ryan stuck to his side. _Hopefully the walk down to the car will sober him up enough so he can get home. I’ll offer the driver an extra bit to make sure he gets home okay. They can charge whatever it costs to my card._

As soon as Chester left to walk Ryan down, Mike got up from his chair, and he couldn’t keep himself from pacing. The urge to follow them was strong, but Mike held back, waiting, counting his steps to keep his breathing under control. Ten steps one direction, ten steps back. Ten steps one direction, and ten more back. He was about to start making squares around the table when Chester came back inside. 

Mike stopped where he was, his eyes going immediately to Chester’s face, searching for clues. He couldn’t stop himself, even though he wanted to not make it a big deal, not tonight, not on another fucking Sunday. “Chester. I… this whole night, this is not okay!”

Chester took an instinctual step back. “What?” he asked, his eyes darting around the loft, but yes, they were alone again. “Look,” he said rethinking his words. “I’m sorry about that. He’s upset and he just wanted to talk and I didn’t know he was going to show up here,” he said, even though he was pretty sure he’d already said that tonight. 

“Showing up here, drunk, Chester! You told me, you _promised_ me, your work life was separate from this. From us. And now, here comes Ryan, dragging your work into our space. Our home, Ches, I can’t… I can’t stand it, seeing you with him!” Mike was pacing again, his emotions bouncing between terrified and angry. He was hurt and he was jealous, and neither emotion had won over the other yet.

Chester shook his head, his hands going out. “Okay, just hold on,” he said, something like anger starting to boil in his stomach. “First of all, Ryan’s my friend. Pretty sure I made that clear,” he snapped. “And second of all, this has nothing to do with work, Mike. He’s upset because he got stood up, and he’s hurt and he just wanted to talk. That’s all. I know it fucked up our evening, and I’m sorry, but it’s not like I planned for it to happen.” 

“Just wanted to talk?” Mike scoffed at the terminology. “And grope your leg, and touch your face, and call you ‘Chazzy’? I saw that, Chester, I heard it. Do you know how much that hurts me? Do you know how many hours I’ve sat here, while you were at work, trying my hardest not to picture you with someone else? And he just comes in here, and -” 

He stopped pacing for a minute, and fixed his eyes on Chester. The anger had fizzled out suddenly and was replaced with despair as Mike tried to get the image of Ryan touching Chester’s face out of his mind. “He just sat there, Ches, and the way he touched you, I, I couldn’t make myself stop thinking about how you must be together, and it makes me feel sick! Thinking about him touching you, and kissing you, and… I was wondering, do you fuck him, Ches? Does he fuck you? I hate myself for caring, but I saw the way he looked at you, and I don’t know how you can say there’s nothing there, that it’s just work.” Mike’s eyes were stinging as he tried to hold back the tears that were threatening. “You called him Ry. You have pet names for each other,” he finished brokenly.

Chester had watched as Mike had spilled his heart onto the floor - his fears, his anger, his need. Yelling and screaming back wasn’t going to do any good. If they were going to get past this night, it was time to talk about YRS. It was time for Mike to finally listen. “They’re not pet names,” he said first with a long swallow. “It’s just...we’ve known each other for a long time. It doesn’t mean anything.” He took a step forward and reached out his hand. “I know you don’t like to hear about work, but I think you need to. Come on,” he said, nodding toward the couch. “Mike, please, just let me explain.” 

Mike looked at Chester’s outstretched hand, at the shaking he could see even from where he was, just out of reach. His stomach hurt, and he thought he might be sick before they settled this. It seemed like it had come to the boiling point suddenly, that tonight was going to be pivotal. Make or break, in terms of where they were headed. _I don’t know if I can do this anymore. It’s too hard._

He looked up to see the hope in Chester’s eyes falter a bit as he waited, and the silence stretched between them. It was that look that went straight to Mike’s heart. _I love him. I don’t want this to be over._ Feeling foolish for giving in again, Mike reached for Chester’s hand and allowed himself to be led to the couch. He sat down, but he couldn’t look at Chester. He was staring at the white rug on the floor.

“First of all,” Chester started slowly, keeping his voice as even as possible, “Ryan and I have never, ever done anything sexual that wasn’t for work. I know how you think, Mike, and you don’t have to worry about that.” He waited for a second, hoping his boyfriend would look up at him, but when it didn’t happen, he went on. “He’s been over here a few times, but there’s nothing between us but friendship and what we have to do for work. Mike, Ryan’s not interested in me. Not like that.” 

“But how do you know?” Mike said, “how do you know his lines haven’t gotten blurred?”

“Because he’s in love with someone else,” Chester stated. “I know you’ve heard me talk about Jason...Jason is married to Mark, our boss. I know I’ve mentioned both of them, but there’s a lot I’ve never said. That’s one thing. They’ve been married for a long time. They co-own YRS.” 

“So, you’re saying Ryan’s in love with Jason? Who’s married to your boss?” Mike finally looked up. “Is that what he was talking about, being stood up? That’s why he got drunk and ended up here?”

“It’s complicated,” Chester said as he sat back on the couch, his entire body feeling heavy. “Jason and Mark are in an open marriage.” 

_Open marriage. Add that to the list of things I hate about that place._ “What? Chester, that’s crazy. Open marriage? People really do that?” 

Chester nodded. “Yeah, they really do. Their marriage has always been like that. And it’s always worked for them….but about a year ago, Ryan and Jason started seeing each other. Secretly.” He sat forward, his hand going out to take Mike’s, and to his relief, Mike let him. “Jason’s hard to read sometimes, but according to Ryan, they’re in love. Mark would totally freak out if he knew Jason was dating one of their employees. Fucking is one thing, but actually dating is another. Now that they’re serious, they’ve been hiding it from Mark. Tonight...like Ryan said, he was supposed to meet up with Jason for a date, and Jason stood him up. It’s not the first time it’s happened,” he said, his eyes on his fingers as he stroked Mike’s hand. 

“But… that’s not keeping work separate, having personal relationships at work. I’m so confused.” Mike shook his head, trying to sort through all the emotions, all of the information he was getting. “And being in a relationship, when you’re in a open marriage - not that I understand that concept at _all_ \- that doesn’t even work. And… dating your employees? I don’t care where you work, that’s frowned upon everywhere.” Mike looked at Chester, to see if he was understanding his perspective. 

“I don’t know what to tell you, Mike, love just happens sometimes.” He looked up, offering a sad smile to his boyfriend. “Usually, yeah, dating between people at YRS is frowned on. It causes drama, and especially if it involves Jason. But that’s what’s going on. Ryan has no interest in me,” he stated again. “And I have no interest in him. He’s so far into Jason, it’s almost bothersome. You’d understand if you ever met Jason.” He paused for a moment, a shiver running through him before he looked back up, meeting Mike’s eyes. “My heart’s not attracted to him, Mike. It only loves one person.” 

Mike nodded, wanting so badly to believe his boyfriend. “But what’s to stop someone else, Ches? What’s to stop someone else from falling for you? It happened with Jason and Ryan, and someone could come along and take you from me. Maybe not everyone can separate it the way you can.” Before he gave Chester time to answer, he realized he’d been given a route in to discuss going to YRS again, and Chester hadn’t even realized it when he said it. “Maybe I would understand things better, Chester, if you’d let me go meet everyone. I know, we’ve talked about it before,” he said in a rush as Chester started to speak,” but you just said yourself, I’d understand if I ever met Jason. Maybe I need to, Ches, maybe if I knew exactly what was happening, if I knew what I was up against…” _And if I can get in there maybe I can figure out how to get you out. I know you think these people are your friends, but you don’t need them. You have me. I want to get you out but I can’t do that if I can’t get in there._

He turned his best puppy dog eyes on his boyfriend, having learned just exactly the amount of pleading it took to get his way over the past six months. _He said it himself. I’d understand. C’mon, Ches, let me go visit._

Chester’s first thought was absolutely not. Just like it had been everytime this subject was brought up. Mike was his lover. His boyfriend. His stable relationship that kept him steady while work was hard and chaotic. He didn’t want Mike there. Mike couldn’t even handle hearing about YRS, how could he ever expect to go there and see it in person? “I don’t think that’s a good idea,” he said, even as he felt his walls crumbling under Mike’s big brown eyes. “I’m serious,” he tried to insist. “You’ll see things you don’t like. They’re great guys, but in the end we’re making porn. Porn, Mike.” 

Chester went to say more, to bring up his usual reasons as to why Mike going anywhere near Mark or Jason or anyone else was a bad idea, but he couldn’t. They were at a crossroads, and Chester knew it. He could feel it. Something had to change, or their relationship wasn’t going to make it, and that thought was far more painful than anything else that could possibly happen while Mike took a tour of the YRS house. _I can take him. If Mark will let me. He can walk around and shake hands. He’ll see we’re all friends. He’ll see there’s nothing to worry about. He’ll see the stages and the props and the cameras and he’ll see it’s work. Maybe it could be a good thing._

“Are you sure that’s what you want?” he asked, cocking his head toward Mike. 

_He’s actually considering it. He’s going to let me go._ The curiosity, now that it had been unleashed, was hard to ignore. He needed to go. He needed to see these people, to gauge his place in Chester’s life, to make it known that Chester was taken. He needed to find out what he could do to get Chester out of there. It would be better than doing nothing, which was what he’d been doing for months. Ignoring it, hoping it would all go away, that it wasn’t real if they didn’t speak of it. “Yeah, I want to go,” he said, squeezing Chester’s hand. 

Chester raised Mike’s hand to his lips, kissing it softly. “Okay,” he agreed, and he was shocked at the relief that came with his words. Mike was finally interested. He finally cared about that half of Chester’s life, and that meant something massive in their relationship had just shifted. Shifted to the good. “I’ll have to make sure Mark’s okay with it, of course, but if he says yes, then I’ll take you. You can go meet everyone and maybe it will help.” 

Mike nodded, watching as Chester’s face and posture relaxed a little. Surely it would be a good thing, meeting everyone. Something had to give, and this was it. He was finally going to be let inside the walls of YRS, and maybe he would be able to figure out what to do next to make things right.


	17. A Visit to YRS

Chester looked over, catching the sight of Mike in the passenger’s seat as they drove. _This is it. We’re almost there. Am I really going to take him to YRS? Maybe this is a bad idea. He’s going to freak. Or, maybe he won’t._ Chester’s eyes settled back on the twisting road as they climbed higher into the California hills. He adjusted his sunglasses as a blare from the lazy afternoon sun hit him right as they went around another curve. _The good points. That’s what I need to focus on. 1. He’ll see that it’s really work. He’ll see the cameras and the props and the stupid costumes. And the damn scripts. 2. He’ll get to meet everyone. . .which is a good thing because then when I talk about someone, he’ll know who I’m talking about. And when I say ‘in the living room’ he’ll know what that looks like. 3. He’ll see that I have no real interest in any of these guys. Even Ryan. He’ll see Ryan and Jason together, maybe. That should set his mind more at ease. I think. Yes, it will. It’s going to be okay. I’m just glad Mark agreed to this. I actually didn’t think he would._

“It’s a long drive, but it’s a pretty one,” Chester said, letting his attention drift from the road over to his boyfriend. He loved the way the light was hitting Mike’s blue hair. He looked good enough to jump on. 

“Yeah, it is pretty,” Mike agreed with a sigh. Even though he’d been the one to continually ask to go to YRS, now that they were on their way, he wasn’t so sure it was the best idea he’d ever had. Admittedly, he was curious about the house that Chester spent his weekends at, and he wanted to see the people his boyfriend… spent time with. Mike made a face as he looked out the window. It was probably time to dispense with the euphemisms and just call a spade a spade. _People his boyfriend had sex with. My Chester. I need to see these people. Even if it is going to freak me out. I’m sure these guys are ripped, and I’m over here with a squishy stomach… and now I’m back to wondering what he even sees in me, when he’s surrounded by hot guys every time he’s at work._ “How much further is it?” 

“Almost there,” Chester answered as they came to a break in the road. Chester stopped at the sign, even though there wasn’t another car in sight. He took them to the left, and within in seconds, houses were popping up. Smaller ones at first, or as small as a home in the hills could get. Each one had a well maintained yard. There were grand driveways, porches, and high-end landscaping. Trees lined the streets, along with ornate lamp posts and selected green spaces that served as miniature sitting areas or even parks. 

“We have to go through the gates up here,” Chester finally said as he pointed ahead at a black iron fence that separated the upcoming neighborhood from everything else. There was a single guard house, and Chester pulled the car up to a stop. He rolled down his window before he shifted in his seat enough to get his wallet out from his back pocket. He fumbled through it till he found the little I.D. card to let them in. He swiped it in front of the scanner, and a few seconds later the gates slowly started to swing open. 

It honestly wasn’t anything like Mike was expecting. The neighborhood was beautiful, the houses well-kept instead of the slummy, dark, run-down place Mike had conjured in his head. Nothing about the neighborhood they were entering screamed shady and concerning to Mike, and he automatically started to relax a little bit. “It’s really nice in here, Ches. Not anything like what I was imagining in my head. I mean… well, I just didn’t think we’d be in such a respectable location. The kind of people that live in these neighborhoods probably have no idea what’s happening at YRS. Actually, they probably don’t care.” He turned and caught the frown on Chester’s face as soon as the words ‘respectable location’ popped out of his mouth, and Mike felt his face burn in embarrassment. “Sorry, I didn’t mean for that to sound so harsh. I’m trying to be open-minded.”

Chester let out a sigh. He knew Mike was trying, and he kept that in the forefront of his thoughts. “Mark and Jason live at the house, but it’s also where we work. They have it figured out with the taxes or whatever to make all the numbers come out right. It’s how they can be up here instead of someplace seedier. It’s pretty smart, actually. Mark has real high-end taste. I can’t imagine him in some dive somewhere.” He looked Mike’s way before he added, “remember when I told you before that there are some really bad people out there who take advantage of people like me? People who are working because they have to? Well, trust me, Mike, I’ve seen some ‘studios’ that would make you cringe. At YRS, we have it really nice. You’ll see what I mean.” 

They turned down another street before Chester announced, “It’s just up here; it’s the one at the very end on the right.” 

Mike pressed his palms to his thighs as they made their way down the street and Chester pulled the car into the driveway, through an open gate and onto the YRS property. From the outside it was inconspicuous, a giant house nestled into the hills. Nothing to give away anything that went on inside. “It’s huge,” Mike commented as he looked out the window at the massive two story in front of them. “How many rooms are in this thing?”

Chester tapped his fingers over his lip ring as he thought. “Seven. I think.” He mentally recounted, tapping his lip for each one. “Yeah, think there’s seven. All the bedrooms are upstairs,” he said as he pointed to the second floor. He pulled his sunglasses off since he’d pulled the car off to the side, right under a large tree, its branches casting a massive shady area over the driveway. “And the downstairs has everything else. There’s a pool out back and a hot tub.” He wiggled his eyebrows Mike’s way. “And that’s about it. Oh, and the kitchen. I tell ya’, Sexy Boy, if you and I ever get rich, we need a kitchen like Brad has. The counter space and the appliances and it’s like eight times the size of our kitchen at home!” he shouted, his glee shooting out of him as he slapped Mike playfully on the leg. “And the stove...it’s like twelve burners! Well, okay, not twelve,” he corrected. “More like six. But still. Puts our stove to shame.” 

“If we ever get rich, the first thing we’ll need is a giant closet. Once that’s squared away, you can have your kitchen, but I don’t think that takes priority over me actually having a place to put my flannels and hoodies.” Mike smiled. It was nice to joke around a little, and the way Chester referred to their future together settled his anxiety a little bit. No matter how he felt about YRS, Chester was still looking forward, and that was important to Mike.

“I love that you’re putting a closet at the top of our priority list,” Chester chuckled. He slid his hand back across the car to lay it on Mike’s thigh. “And you’re absolutely right. With your flannel collection, we’ll need a badass closet.” He smiled before he leaned forward, catching Mike’s lips in a soft kiss as he gently squeezed his leg. “Well, you ready? Last chance to say no and we can go home and get naked instead.” 

One look into Chester’s bedroom eyes and Mike was ready to say fuck YRS and make the drive back home. Or around the corner to one of those parks where they could stop the car and make out. But this visit was important, and even though Mike’s half-hard cock was ready to come out and play after just one kiss, he shook his head no. “Ches, don’t,” he breathed, their faces still close. “You know how impossible it is to say no to you. Don’t make me say no.” He ran a single finger across Chester’s bottom lip, flipping his lip ring gently. “We’ll get naked later. Right now, you owe me a tour of your workplace.” 

It took all of Chester’s willpower to not grab Mike’s fingers with his lips and tongue. It took everything in him to not push forward and snag another kiss, to run his hand further up Mike’s leg. But making out in the car would just bring frustration in the end, because it really wasn’t a suitable place to get anything on. At least not comfortably. “You’re right,” he admitted, shutting his eyes for a moment and taking a deep breath before he pulled back. “Well, let’s go. We don’t have to stay long. And Mark knows we’re coming, so you’ll probably luck out and they won’t be filming anything.” _I hope._

Chester opened his door and stepped out, sucking in the warm air and the smell of the trees and freshly cut grass. The underground sprinkler heads were just popping up, and water sprayed everywhere as Chester rushed to get to the other side of the car, avoiding getting soaked. He straightened out his black and gray t-shirt, patting away a few wet spots. “Come on,” he said with a wave and a smile as Mike stayed put in the car. 

Mike hadn’t considered the possibility they could walk in on a scene being filmed, and the thought gave him pause for a moment. He’d never been big into porn. He’d seen some, like anyone else, but it was too superficial for him. The thought of walking into a scene sounded like exactly the way he did _not_ want to meet Chester’s coworkers. With a deep breath, he got out of the car, sliding his hand into Chester’s immediately and squeezing it tightly. “Okay, let’s go.” 

Chester led the way past the three car garage and along the red brick walkway that led to the front porch. He was starting to feel his stomach flip slightly as they took the front steps together, and crossed between the massive white pillars that made the YRS house look just that much more grand. They stopped in front of two large white doors, and Chester hesitated. _This is really it. Once we walk through these doors, he’s really here. He won’t be able to unsee any of this...but it’s what he wanted. What he wants._ He sucked in the air, and after glancing toward Mike one last time, he reached for the door handles, and a second later, they were stepping into the wide, air conditioned foyer of YRS. 

Chester’s slightly wet sneakers squeaked against the polished white marble tiling as he spun around to shut the door behind them. “That way leads to the dining room, and the kitchen,” Chester said as he pointed to the right. “And over here -”

“Chester,” a thirty-something man said as he strolled up to the couple. He had on dark pants and a dark blue shirt, his build on the broad side. “Didn’t know you were going to be here today.” He kept his hands on his belt, making himself look taller than he was as his eyes flipped back and forth between Chester and the blue haired kid he didn’t know. 

“Yeah, I’m not supposed to be,” Chester answered, his free hand rubbing over his neck for a moment. “I’m here just for a few hours to show Mike around.” He turned to point, “Adam, this is my boyfriend, Mike Shinoda. Mike, this is Adam. He keeps track of the front door for us.” 

Immediately Mike put his hand out to shake the other man’s. “Nice to meet you,” he said, looking Adam straight in the eyes. In his head he was already trying to take mental snapshots of everyone he would meet so he could learn their names quickly. Nothing was more awkward than immediately forgetting the name of someone you’d just met. Adam’s hand shake was firm, and brief, and Mike felt a little uneasy at the way his eyes were boring into him. Like he was also trying to memorize Mike’s face. _Of course, that makes sense, if he’s supposed to be watching the door. Calm down, Mike._

“It’s nice to meet you, too,” Adam stated before he pulled his hand back. He looked at the two of them and smiled. “It’s nice to finally see this ‘boyfriend’ Chester’s been talking about. I told him I thought he was making you up,” he jabbed with a good-hearted smile. 

“I’d never make up having a boyfriend,” Chester was quick to add with a roll of his eyes. 

There was a small bit of silence that passed over them before Adam stepped to the side. “Well, you two have fun. I’ll see you when you come back out, or are you staying? We close the gates at nine, Chester, don’t forget.” 

Mike’s ears picked up on the gate instructions as Chester nodded and reached for MIke’s hand to pull him away. They were just a few steps down the hallway when Mike whispered, “what’s he mean? Like, if we don’t leave by nine, we can’t leave at all?” 

Chester shrugged. “Kind of. Yeah,” he finally said nonchalantly. “It’s just the house rule. But we won’t be here that long.” 

“Okay,” Mike said slowly. Already there were rules to keep track of, and he hadn’t even met anyone Chester worked with yet. As he followed his boyfriend he couldn’t help but look over the various paintings he could see on the walls. There seemed to be quite an extensive collection, and Mike really wanted to check them out and see if he was looking at originals or reprints, and who the artists were, but Chester was on a mission, so he settled for asking another question, this one a bit louder than the last. “There’s a lot of artwork here, Ches. Who’s into art?” 

Chester stopped. They had just stepped into a larger room with two matching white sofas and a running fountain by a floor to ceiling window. Massive ceramic pots dotted the corners, holding green plants and mini garden gnomes. “I think Jason is the one who picks out the paintings,” he said as he looked at the three paneled painting that was hanging above the sofas - a smattering of reds, blacks, and a splash of yellow that bled through all three panels. “And Mark brings in all this other stuff,” he said, gesturing to the fountain and plants. “I think. You’d have to ask Ryan. He’d know.” 

“Ryan.” Mike couldn’t help the bitterness in his voice as Ryan’s name was brought into the mix. “Is he here today? Or is it his day off, too?” He looked around, really hoping not to have to see Chester’s partner today.

“I’m not totally sure,” Chester answered. “But sometimes he’s here even if he’s not technically working. You know because he likes to spend extra time -” Chester suddenly clapped his mouth shut as his eyes darted around the room and out the two arched doorways before he leaned a little closer to Mike, lowering his voice, “because he likes to spend extra time with Jason. But you can’t say anything about that to anyone here. Ryan knows you know, I told him, but that’s it.” He shook his head. “We’ll all get in trouble if Mark finds out, and it would crush Ryan, so just act like you don’t know.” 

Mike nodded obediently, his eyes following Chester’s around the room. _Trouble. He says that like they’re a bunch of kids going to be punished. That’s the second time he’s said it that way, he said something about trouble when they were in Hawaii. I’ll have to remember to ask about that later._ “So…” he started, not sure what to say next. “Where do you… film at?” 

“It depends,” Chester said, his voice returning to normal as he nodded for Mike to follow him. “In here,” he said, pointing to a stray tripod that was left by the doorway, “or anywhere. It depends on how the story goes. Usually Mark has a vision,” he said dramatically as he spread his hands out in front of him as they went, “and we film wherever that vision looks the best. Bedrooms or in the library, just wherever. Out by the pool sometimes. Or even in the woods behind the house. This one time we rolled into a batch of poison ivy. It was terrible,” he chuckled. “I know what that shit looks like now.” 

“That sounds totally awful,” Mike gasped, his eyes wide. “I can’t even imagine.” He kept looking around the house as they moved through rooms. Chester was right, it was posh. It was nothing like what Mike had been imagining, and he reluctantly agreed in his head that it wasn’t so bad. Poison ivy naked sounded bad, but this house was actually pretty awesome. They had just crossed into another room when Mike’s eyes landed on a grand piano in the center of the room. Instantly he felt his fingers twitch automatically, eager to play. “Chester! You didn’t tell me there was a piano! Does anyone actually play it?” 

They walked over to the grand, black instrument, which was set up right in front of a wall of windows that looked out over the furthest corner of the property, right at the woods Chester had just been speaking about. He leaned against it, shrugging his shoulders. “I’ve never heard anyone actually play music on it. I know they’ve shot some scenes with it, but I don’t know if any of us know how to play. Maybe Brad,” he amended with a second more of thought. 

Mike was dying to sit down and play it, but he didn’t ask. They weren’t there to play piano recitals. “That’s too bad, what a waste. It’s a beautiful instrument,” he murmured as he stroked his fingers over the keys lightly. “So,” he said, turning back to Chester, “where is everyone you’re supposed to be introducing me to? We haven’t seen anyone yet.”

“I don’t know. They’re around somewhere,” Chester answered, just as he caught the flash of something out of the corner of his eyes. “There,” he said, as he pointed back the way they’d come in. “Hey! Toby! Come here for a sec!” he waved his hand, and in walked a young guy, looking no older than nineteen. He had sandy blonde hair that fell over his eyes. He didn’t have on anything but a smile and a bright silky yellow robe.

“Chester!” he shouted, like they hadn’t seen each other in years. “What are you doing here? I thought you were off today?” His big blue eyes jumped right to Mike. “And who’s this? A new guy?” 

“No, no,” MIke rushed to say, feeling his ears turning pink. “I’m Mike. I’m Chester’s boyfriend.” He stuck his hand out and waited for Toby to shake it. 

“The boyfriend!” Toby shouted, his smile wider than a clown’s as he bypassed Mike’s hand and pulled him into a quick hug, squeezing him tightly for a second. “So Chester finally brought you to meet us? That’s awesome!” He took a step back, flipping his hair from his face. “You two have to come out to the pool,” he suggested, pointing at them both. “Seriously, Chester. The pool. It’s heaven out there today and Rob is here,” he added with a goofy twist of his body.

Chester was trying not to laugh, and even more, he was hoping Mike wasn’t freaking out over the Toby hug. “We will,” he promised, quickly. “I’m taking Mike around first though, to meet everyone and whatever.” 

“Okay, okay,” Toby agreed, putting his hands up like he was trying to declare peace. “Imma head back out there. See you guys later. Mike, it’s great to meet you. The boyfriend!” he shouted again before he happily knocked Mike on the arm, and then he was gone, out the doorway. 

With a half smile, Mike looked at Chester and blew out a breath. “Is everyone going to be that… enthusiastic?” He didn’t want to ask if everyone would also be in the same level of undress. 

Chester shook his head. “No, that’s just Toby. He’s a little crazy. We all love him though. Come on, let’s go see if Brad’s in the kitchen.” He took Mike’s hand and headed out the same way Toby had left. They went back down a hallway, and crossed through a dining room that held a massive oak table before they stepped into the gourmet kitchen Chester had been slobbering about earlier. 

The same marble tiled floors flowed into the kitchen. Bay windows stood at one end, letting in the sunlight and fresh air. White cabinets with silver pulls lined the walls, and open shelving filled in the few empty spaces that were there. The counters were endless - light colored granite that Chester tapped his knuckles on as he moved around and headed for the stove, where a curly haired man was standing, stirring something in a massive silver pot. The air was overloaded with what Chester knew right away was lobster bisque. His stomach rumbled.

“Hey, Brad,” Chester called as he stood close. “I hope that’s what I think it is.” 

The chef, with his pale skinny arms sticking out of his tan sleeveless shirt turned around. He adjusted his hair net, which was keeping his wild curls under control. “Chester, what are you doing here? You’re not on for today...or!” he said, snapping his fingers, “no, no, I knew this was going to happen. I had a vision earlier that we’d have two more people for dinner tonight but...oh. Well, damn. You’re only one more mouth to feed.” His shoulders slumped in disappointment. “You didn’t happen to bring twice your normal appetite with you, did you?” 

Chester shook his head. “No,” he said, “but I did bring my boyfriend with me.” He turned to see Mike still hanging back by the doorway, and he waved for him to come closer. “Brad, this is Mike Shinoda. Mike, this is Brad Delson, the most badass cook to ever live. He can also see the future,” he added with a broad smile. 

With a wave in Brad’s direction, Mike stepped into the kitchen. “Nice to meet you,” he said politely, inhaling the heavenly scent coming from the pot on the stove. Mike knew food, and he knew whatever was cooking smelled delicious. “That smells great, by the way.” He gestured to the pot with a smile and a hope that he might get to try it later. 

“It’s good to meet you, too,” Brad offered with a nod. “And thank you, Chester, for the compliment,” he said with another nod. “But trust me, I’m not as great as he says. He just likes to eat. And I can’t really tell the future,” he said, his voice dropping to an odd sort of whisper, his brown eyes and bushy eyebrows swirling, like he was half mad. “But I do get visions sometimes. I’m just a little psychic. But don’t say anything about it to Mark. He doesn’t like me to talk about it,” he whispered before he stood himself back up to his full stature and turned his attention back to the stove. 

It was the second warning bell to chime in Mike’s head about Mark. First Chester, now Brad. Mike shifted on his feet uneasily and glanced at his boyfriend, who was completely oblivious to anything being amiss. “I’ll keep it to myself,” he assured, watching Brad stir the pot intently. “Ches? Are we staying for dinner?” Mike wasn’t sure if he wanted him to say yes or no. Part of him was ready to meet the others and go, but his stomach really wanted dinner. He cocked his head in Chester’s direction. 

“Well, according to Brad’s vision, we are,” Chester said, nudging Mike playfully on his side, just as he heard voices coming down the hall. A minute later, two young men stepped in. They were soaking wet, and wearing nothing but matching red speedos as they laughed back and forth. 

“Brad, we’re starving!” the one said, just before his attention stopped. “Hey, Chester, what are you doing here?”

“Yeah, man, thought you were off today?” the other one said, his short black hair dripping water down his tanned face. 

Before Chester could say anything, Brad had his hands in the air. “Devon! Josh! You’re getting pool water all over the floor!” 

The two men cracked up laughing, before they obediently stepped back out into the hallway, and Chester and Mike followed after bidding Brad a farewell and see you later. 

“Mike, this is Devon and Josh,” Chester introduced quickly, motioning to each one in turn. “Guys, this is Mike Shinoda, my boyfriend.” 

“Hi,” Mike answered automatically, feeling his cheeks blush a bit. He’d never been around so many attractive and barely dressed men before. He was more than a little uncomfortable, and he was a little bit bothered that to Chester everything seemed normal.

Devon was first to offer a hand to shake, but he stopped. “Oh, sorry, man, I’m all wet. It’s nice to meet you though. Chester,” he said, turning his attention away. “Are you working?” 

“No, just brought Mike up to show him around and introduce him. Is Mark around?”

“He’s upstairs, I think,” Josh answered before he looked to Mike. “It’s nice to meet you. We gotta get going back out to the pool,” he said, taking Devon by the arm. “We’re on for a scene later and we’re running out of time. See you guys later,” he offered and then they were gone, headed down the hallway. 

“So… they’ve got a scene later.” Mike turned to Chester, still trying to keep things straight in his head about how all of this worked. “Are they, like, usually together? Does it get switched up? Have you? Ever?” Mike looked down at the floor. “Don’t answer that. I don’t want to know.” 

Chester scratched his head. “Good, because I wasn’t sure if there was a real question in there or not,” he said with an awkward squint of his eyes. “Um, but yeah, they are together a lot. They actually have a series they’re doing that’s really popular called Cum Boys To The Rescue,” he said with a little chuckle. “Come on, let’s go upstairs. I’ll show you my room.” 

They headed back toward the middle of the house to hit the staircase. They passed by a smaller room with a door that wasn’t all the way closed. “Here,” Chester said, grabbing Mike’s arm to stop him. “Look.” He pushed the door open and flipped on the light to reveal three rows of standing racks, each one crammed full of outfits. “These are the costumes,” Chester said with a point, though he stayed in the doorway. “Some of them are really terrible.” 

“Yeah, it looks like it,” Mike agreed, glancing inside the room over Chester’s shoulder. “You must really hate that. Not being able to choose your own clothes.”

Chester dropped his head for a moment. Mike knew him too well. “I do hate it. It’s one of the worst parts. Some of them are really uncomfortable and if you have to stay in them too long it’s torture. Well, not torture,” he said, knowing Mike wouldn’t like that word. “It just sucks some days. Anyway, let’s go upstairs and find Mark and Jason.” He quickly flipped off the lightswitch, leaving the costume room in the dark before they headed out.

They got to the central staircase, and Chester led the way. His hand glided along the polished dark wood banister before they got to the upper landing. The marble tiled floor continued here, running to the right and the left. “My room’s down there,” Chester said before he turned and pointed the other way. “But there’s Amir. Come on,” he said, reaching for Mike’s hand. 

“Hey, Chester,” Amir greeted quietly as he neared the pair. “What are you doing here today? And…” he looked over at Mike, flipping his long black bangs back from his eyes with a shake of his head, “who’s this tasty thing?” 

“This is Mike,” Chester said, matching Amir’s lower volume, though he wasn’t sure why they were whispering. “He’s my boyfriend. I just brought him to show him around and meet everyone.” 

“Well, stay away from back there,” he nodded over his shoulder toward the end of the hallway. “Ry and Jason are… in a meeting.” Amir looked at Mike curiously, his black eyes taking in the blush on Mike’s cheeks and the hesitancy in his stance. 

Mike didn’t say anything. It was clear that Amir didn’t know that he knew about Ryan and Jason’s relationship, and he was surprised to find that it seemed to not be that big of a secret, except from the mysterious Mark. For everyone to walk on eggshells around the boss but be okay with the illicit relationship between Mark’s husband and an employee was beyond Mike’s comprehension. 

“Okay,” Chester agreed with a nod. “Where’s Mark? Devon and Josh said he was up here.” He quickly turned, looking down the hallway before flipping back around to Amir. “Are you standing guard for them?” he asked, pointing toward the closed door at the end of the hall. 

Amir flicked his gaze over to Mike again, lifting his chin to peer at him closer. “I guess you know, then,” he nodded curtly. “Yeah, I’m keeping an eye on things. Ry said they’d be quick, whatever that means.” His thin lips finally broke into a bit of a smile, making his expression much more welcoming than it had been. “You know how they are. I have no idea where Mark is, and I hope I don’t find out.”

Chester shook his head as he whispered, “Me either.” 

A moment later they heard a door open, down at the other end of the hall. They turned just in time to see Mark stepping out of one of the bedrooms, a younger man with him. “There he is,” Chester whispered as he nodded toward his boss. “And that’s Caleb.” 

“He’s always with someone,” Amir whispered. “You go introduce him to Mike, get him downstairs, please,” he asked, hoping Chester would be enough of a distraction. He hated when Ryan and Jason couldn’t keep their hands to themselves at the house. It was a disaster waiting to happen. 

“Yeah, okay,” Chester agreed easily before he tugged on Mike’s hand. They were only a few steps down the hall when Mark’s face brightened. He raised his hand, the creases around his eyes showing. 

“Chester,” he said, and the moment he got close enough he pulled him into a hug, disheveling Chester’s hold on Mike’s hand. “I almost forgot you were coming up today.”

“Well, we’re here,” Chester said, pulling away. He cleared his throat and straightened out the front of his t-shirt before he gestured beside him. “Mark, this is Mike, my boyfriend. The one I’ve been telling you about. Mike, my boss,” he said, “and this is Caleb.”

Mark’s smile widened as he stuck out his hand. “Mike, it’s so nice to finally meet you,” he said as he slid his glance up and down Chester’s boyfriend, checking out his frame, the way he held himself. 

Mike hesitated just long enough that he knew Mark had noticed, and he bit his bottom lip as he forced his hand out. “It’s… nice to meet you… sir.” He felt hot under Mark’s gaze, and incredibly uncomfortable, even though there was nothing menacing in his expression at all. Something about the self-assured posture, the way Mark’s eyes raked over his body, made Mike feel exposed. 

“I hope Chester’s been showing you around our humble home properly,” Mark said, his eyes flipping back and forth between the couple. Mike nodded and Mark felt something settle on the back of his mind. “I have to say I love your hair. It’s fabulous and it goes perfectly with Chester’s.” He reached out, his wiry fingers fumbling to touch the blue spikes. 

Mike froze. “I… um… thanks. My roommate dyes it for me,” he forced out, feeling a little panicky but trying not to show it. He squeezed his lips together and tried to smile back at the older man. 

Mark barely got his fingers feathered through the very top of Mike’s hair before Chester pulled his boyfriend back and took a half step between them. “Yeah, his roommate is going to beauty school,” he stated. “So, Mark, Mike was asking about the piano downstairs and the artwork. Do you have time to tell him a little about those before we go?” 

Mark opened his mouth, ready to answer, just as he got a glimpse of Amir standing a few feet down the hallway. “What’s he doing?” he asked, pointing over Chester’s shoulder. “Amir!” he hollered, waving his hand. “Come here!” 

Chester looked between his boss and his co-worker, his pulse racing. He was supposed to get Mark to go downstairs, not drag Amir into the conversation. 

Reluctantly Amir made his way over to the group, frowning at the dynamic - wide-eyed, innocent Mike; the new kid, Caleb, who clearly had no idea what was going on; and Chester and Mark each in a state of irritation. He patted over the blonde streak in his hair, smoothing it down, and rested cool eyes on Mark. “What? I’m off the clock right now, you know.”

“I know,” Mark defended quickly. “But what are you doing?” He leaned a little to the left, trying to see around his employee. 

Amir rolled his eyes and studied his silver nail polish. “I came up with Chester and Mike, looking for you. Damn, I didn’t know I was going to be interrogated.” He feigned boredom as he stretched out his fingers. “Didn’t think I needed to be part of the introductions, either.”

Chester had to turn around, hiding his laugh. 

Mark looked Amir over before he rolled his eyes. “You and your mouth. You’re damn lucky you’re cute. Aggravating. But cute.” He flashed Amir a quick grin before he turned back to Chester and the others. “Sorry about that, Mike. You have to be careful around this one,” he said, hiking his thumb over his shoulder to Amir, “he’s strong-willed. Now, the art downstairs. Come on, and I’ll give you a proper tour of our collection.” He motioned for Caleb to go first as he muttered, “and Caleb, you can run along now with the others.” 

The blonde nodded quickly, tossing a soft, awkward smile to Chester and Amir before he scurried down the stairs in front of everyone. He was out of sight before Mark had even started to lead the way. 

As Mark turned to watch Caleb disappear, Amir mouthed a quick “one minute” to Chester. He needed to be the last one downstairs, to give Ryan and Jason a heads up that their time together was over. 

Mike reached for Chester’s hand silently, pulling him closer before they started down the stairs together, Mike first, and Chester behind him. The last thing Mike wanted was to be next to Mark. He needed Chester as a buffer, and he was relieved to keep his boyfriend close.

Mark led them through three rooms downstairs, prattling on about designers and the cost of certain art pieces - statues, Chinese vases, and paintings. It wasn’t until they landed in the workout room, that Chester pulled Mike to the front of their small caravan. “This is the room of blood, sweat, and tears,” he told his boyfriend as he took him over to a weight bench, and then a treadmill. Windows were on the far wall, and right outside was the pool, which Chester didn’t wait to point to. “Mark,” he said, spinning around to look at his boss, who was staring at his phone. “Thanks for the art education. I’m going to take Mike out to the pool.” 

“Okay, have fun,” the forty-year-old said, barely looking up. “Chester, you’re staying for dinner, aren’t you? It wouldn’t be a proper tour if Mike didn’t get to taste Brad’s fine cooking, now would it?” He was staring Chester in the eyes now, his concentration on ten. 

Chester nodded without even looking Mike’s way as he agreed for the both of them - they’d stay and eat. 

“Very good,” Mark announced. “I’ll see you two for lobster bisque later.” He turned around without saying more, his eyes back on his phone as he went. 

Mike glanced out at the pool, where he could see most of the guys he’d met fooling around and having a good time. The water was sparkling clear and looked so inviting, but the thought of going swimming with Mark around, being _shirtless_ with Mark lurking about, made his skin crawl. “Ches,” he said, his voice low, “I’m all for dinner, but… I don’t know if I’m feeling up to swimming. Isn’t it close to dinner time anyway? We can just eat and go home.” He slid a hand down the front of Chester’s shirt, then around to rest on his boyfriend’s hip. “Besides, didn’t we talk earlier about going home and getting naked?” Mike quirked an eyebrow at Chester and smiled. 

“Yes. We need to go home and get naked,” Chester replied without thought before he leaned in and grabbed a quick kiss from Mike’s ready lips. “And we don’t have to swim. Come on, we’ll just walk around the pool and say hi and then we can go forage for food while we wait on Brad to finish dinner.” 

Mike let out a sigh, but he followed anyway as Chester opened the door and they stepped out onto the covered patio. Wicker furniture dotted the area, along with beach towels and abandoned sandals, shirts, and sunglasses. Devon and Josh were in the water, Devon perched on Josh’s wider shoulders as they splashed and played chicken against Toby and Caleb. Their hoots and hollers were loud and unfiltered as they cussed one another and called each other names while water went everywhere. Joyful grins were on each of their youthful faces. 

As reluctant as he was, Mike couldn’t help but think that everyone looked like they were having a good time. Relaxed. The opposite of how he felt at the moment. _Everyone seems content here. It’s just me freaking out about every little thing. I’m the one with the problems. This is just normal to all of them. Why does it feel so weird to me?_

Chester held back, the two of them standing by the wicker furniture as he pointed to a taller man at the far side of the pool. He was bent forward, a long handled skimmer net in his hands as he scooped a few stray leaves from the top of the water. His dark hair was cut short and he sported a closely cropped goatee. The baggy pair of hunter green shorts and black tank top made it obvious that he spent time in the gym when he wasn’t cleaning pools. He was tall, taller than Mark, or any of the others around YRS, and somehow managed to look younger than everyone else there as well.

“That’s Rob,” Chester said. “He takes care of the pool for us. He’s actually kind of the neighborhood pool guy. He’s pretty cool.” Chester offered a shrug as he turned Mike’s way. “I mean, he puts up with us, so I gotta give him credit.” 

Rob looked over just in time to catch Mike giving him a once over. Knowing he’d been caught staring, Mike blushed as he awkwardly looked away, too far from Rob to say hello. He followed Chester around the pool, ignoring the stray comments coming from the jovial bunch in the water, which was splashing up onto the cement area. 

“Rob,” Chester called as he and Mike stepped up to be within speaking distance, “I wanted to introduce you to Mike.” 

“Hey, Mike,” Rob said, his tone friendly but cautious. He paused, holding the skimmer in one hand as he glanced over at Mike. “You guys don’t look dressed for the pool,” he commented, turning his eyes back to Chester.

“We’re not swimming,” Mike answered for his boyfriend, looking around the pool area. “Chester’s just showing me around.”

“Yeah, I’m just introducing him to everyone. We’re going to grab dinner and head home,” Chester added before he realized he hadn’t actually told Rob who Mike was. “He’s my boyfriend,” he stated, pointing between the two of them. “Forgot to mention that.” He tossed Rob a wide smile before he turned to Mike. “We’ve been together for awhile, so I figured I’d better let him meet all these crazies.” He nodded his head back toward the pool and the shouts that were slowly getting closer. 

Rob cracked a smile at Mike and looked out over the water. “They are pretty crazy, but pretty harmless too. Don’t let them get to you,” he offered with a roll of his dark eyes.

“I’ll try... good to meet you,” Mike added as an afterthought, watching as Rob dipped the skimmer back in the water. Chester had already stepped away so Mike followed hastily, stopping where his boyfriend had paused to make small talk with the guys in the water. His attention drifted away for a moment as he looked along the windows at the back of the house, wondering which one belonged to Chester’s bedroom. 

“I see why you’ve been hiding your boyfriend all this time, Chester,” Devon said his dark hair dripping wet as he sat on Josh’s shoulders. “He’s quite cute. Why don’t you two jump in and play chicken with us? No swimsuits necessary!” he cackled. “Just strip it off, Chester!” 

A round of cat calls sounded from the pool as Chester told them all to shut up. “We’re not getting in,” he insisted. “But you guys have fun.” He flashed the four boys his best smile, thinking nothing of it. This was normal. They all teased each other. It meant nothing. But it was in that moment that he jerked his attention around to Mike. _Ugh, he’ll probably read something into that._

“Come on, Chester!” Toby called next. He was on top of Caleb, and he reached to swat at Chester’s nearby foot. “You can’t give Mike a proper tour without showing him the pool!” 

“Yeah, no, we’re good,” Chester stated as he went to take a step back, but Toby’s hand reached just far enough to grab his sneaker. Chester leaned forward to swat him away, but Toby caught his hand, and a second later Chester went head first right into the water. He splashed around as the others laughed. Josh and Caleb submerged, forcing their riders off and now they were all in a circle with Chester in the middle. They splashed and shoved the water, making playful waves.

“Assholes!” Chester called, smacking the water as he headed to get out of the middle of them. He glanced over, watching as Mike just stood at the edge of the pool. _Fuck. Fuckin’ idiots,_ he cursed in his head as he made his way over to the ladder to get out. 

“Don’t be a pussy boy, Chester!” 

“Yeah, we love you! Come on!” 

“Not happening!” Chester called over his shoulder as he finally reached the three step ladder. He hoisted himself out, his clothes soaking wet and hanging off of him. He heard the guys call after him a few more times, but then they gave up as Chester stood wringing out his shirt and shaking the water from his ruined mohawk. 

Despite the fact that Chester was visibly annoyed, Mike couldn’t help but smile at him as he reached to smooth Chester’s wet hair back from his forehead. Without thinking about their audience, he said, “wow, babe, your hair is a mess. Looks like we’re going home for sure.” He was a little bit relieved, and definitely felt like he’d seen enough of YRS for the day. Mike caught Chester’s eyes and motioned toward the house. “Want me to go get you a towel?” 

Chester nodded. He hated this. Swimming was fun, but being soaking wet in your clothes was something else. “Please,” he said before he flung his co-workers a nasty look. “You losers are all going to die if my shoes are ruined!” he threatened, and even though he was upset, he couldn’t help the crack of a smile that followed his words. 

Mike disappeared into the house as Chester fussed at his friends, unsure where to get a towel from. He made his way down the hall and into the kitchen, where Brad was taking bread out of the oven. Brad had seemed nice enough earlier, and Mike cleared his throat to alert the other man to his presence. “Um, hey, Brad? I need to grab Chester a towel, can you point me in the right direction?” 

Brad pulled his red oven mitts off before he turned to see Mike standing in the doorway of his kitchen. “A towel?” he repeated. “There’s a closet down the hall,” he said as he crossed the room to meet Mike. “You actually passed it on your way here. It’s a thinner door, you’ll see it. There’s towels in there. Is everything okay?” he asked, his hands going out, like he was trying to feel something around Mike’s shape. “I’m getting a strange vibe from you all of the sudden.” 

“Oh, yeah, yeah… I’m fine, I just need a towel.” Mike looked back down the hallway, a bit distracted. “Man, dinner smells good,” he said, his eyes being pulled back to the stove as his stomach rumbled a bit. Brad’s hands all around his space felt less intrusive than Mark’s staring, even less intrusive than Mark touching his hair, and Mike smiled a bit. “Whatever you’re feeling, I’m sure it’s just me being freaked out over being here. I’m okay, though. We’re leaving after dinner. No way I was missing out on this lobster bisque. Chester says it’s amazing.”

Brad suddenly snapped his fingers, his brown eyes shining. “That’s it! That’s the strange vibe - you’re hungry!” His smile was wide. He loved hungry people. They made the best guests at his table. “Don’t you worry though, by the time I get done with you, you’ll be so stuffed you won’t want to move. Hungry,” he repeated with a nod, like he was agreeing with himself. “I knew it.” 

“Yeah,” Mike said, even though it seemed obvious that he’d be hungry. It _was_ dinner time, after all. Before Brad could say anything else to him, Mike scrambled back down the hallway, locating the closet and a towel, and taking it back out to the pool. 

Chester was still mouthing off to the guys in the pool when Mike got back to him. “Here, Ches,” he said, tossing the towel at his boyfriend’s head as soon as he turned toward him. 

Chester caught the towel and quickly dried off his face. He was already calming down as he wiped away the pool water. His hair was next. He didn’t have much, but he hated being in front of everyone looking like a drowned rat. “I guess you guys are forgiven,” he told his co-workers, all of them hanging around the edge of the pool just a few feet away. 

“Of course you’re forgiving us,” Toby was the first to say, his face shining with water and a glint of mischief in his eyes. “Come on, Mike,” he said, turning his attention away from Chester, “push him in again and we’ll hold him down.” 

Mike took one look at Chester’s face and his heart melted. There was no way he was pushing him back into the pool. He knew how much his boyfriend hated looking less than perfect in public. Besides, he didn’t know these guys, and he definitely wasn’t one of the gang. He didn’t have to fit in. “Nah,” he said with a smile, reaching out to grab Chester’s arm and pull him close, but not touching, “I think he’s had enough swimming for tonight. Let’s go get you dry, Ches.” 

He tugged on Chester’s arm and then looked down at the guys in the water. It was the perfect time to put his stamp on Chester, to show everyone there that they were together, so despite Chester’s wet clothes, Mike pulled him in for a kiss. He felt Chester’s surprise as he stepped closer and molded their lips together. Ignoring the taste and smell of chlorine, Mike let the kiss last just long enough for his boyfriend to be breathless when he pulled back. “C’mon,” he said, tilting his head toward the back door. 

The shiver running through Chester’s body was no longer from his wet clothes. His lips were barely parted as he breathed. His mind was clouded with a rush of a mix of hormones and the love connection he had with Mike. From somewhere behind him, he heard his co-workers mumbling, some of them letting out sappy “Awwwwws”, but Chester didn’t care. He let Mike pull him along, and then they were back inside. 

They didn’t say anything as they rushed to get through the house, Chester dripping water everywhere as they went. When they got to the top of the stairs, Amir was no longer standing guard, and Chester let out a long relieved sigh. “My room’s down here,” he said, as he headed down the hall. “I can’t believe they pulled me in. Well, yeah, I can believe it, but they picked the wrong day to be annoying,” he said as he opened one of the bedroom doors. “And this it.” He motioned around the room before he darted for the closet. “Whenever I call you, I’m in this room.” He turned away from Mike, and started to shift through the small collection of shirts and pants that he kept in his YRS closet long term. 

Mike sat down on the end of the bed, his eyes on Chester’s backside. He smiled as he realized he was going to get an unexpected strip show. “The bed feels as comfy as you said,” Mike commented, bouncing on it once. “But it’s not as good as ours. This blanket and these sheets are all wrong.”

Chester smiled as he pulled a plain white t-shirt from the closet and turned around. “Nothing compares to our bed at home. And I don’t get to pick the sheets and stuff,” he said, tossing his chosen shirt to the bed before he spun around to get a pair of pants. “Nothing in here is mine, other than the clothes I keep.” He plucked a pair of gray corduroy pants out and threw those to the bed next, and then he stopped. “So, uh, want to hear something weird?” 

“Weirder than the fact that I‘m sitting here right now? Sure. Hit me,” Mike said drily. There was no limit to things he thought were weird about YRS.

“You’re probably going to think I’m a freak or something, but I never thought you’d actually be here, but you are, so…” Chester turned around and reached back into the closet to pull out a red and black flannel shirt. He held it up. “I stole this from you one night. I keep it here so I can...you know, have something of you here with me.” He took a small breath, his eyes going up toward the ceiling. “Sometimes it goes to bed with me. I wouldn’t say I cuddle with it...but yeah, it’s kind of like that.” He dropped his gaze to look at his boyfriend, already cringing and hoping Mike wouldn’t think he was a complete psycho. 

Mike felt his whole body give in to a flood of warmth from Chester’s admission. All of the odd little worries about the people at YRS and just being on the property seemed very far away as he looked at the shirt he’d been missing and his boyfriend’s hopeful face. “Ches, I’ve been looking for that, you know,” Mike said, his mind instantly thinking naughty thoughts of telling Chester he’d been bad and needed to be punished. He smiled instead and teased, “I believe you don’t cuddle it… I think you sleep in it.” 

He reached out and ran his hand down the sleeve of the missing flannel shirt, and looked up at Chester. “Either way, I think it’s sweet. I miss you when you’re gone, too, you know.” He wanted Chester to get out of his wet clothes so he could pull him down on the bed and enjoy a private minute before they went to dinner. “You should wear it down to dinner.” He smiled devilishly at Chester, knowing there was no way he was putting on a flannel shirt. 

Chester gasped, his eyes popped. “I’m not even going to justify that comment with an answer.” He turned to put the shirt back and shut the closet door. “And I’m sorry I stole it, I know you’ve been looking for it. But you’re not getting it back.” He glanced Mike’s way, knowing his boyfriend was ready with something smart to say back, but he didn’t wait. Instead he pulled his wet shirt off, the material sticking to him as he did, and once it was gone, his skin felt even stickier. _Yuk. I need a shower._ He grumbled to himself as he walked over to the dresser. He left his shirt there, in a wet heap as he opened up one of the drawers and pulled out a pair of white socks that had gray tips across the toes, and a matching pair of smokey gray underwear. “Mike,” he said, turning back toward the bed, “I need to take a shower. I’m gross. Will you be okay in here for a few minutes? I’ll rush, I swear,” he said, as he headed to grab his shirt and pants. 

“Well, yeah, I guess,” Mike said, looking around the room in uncertainty. “Nobody would come in your room, right? This is your private space?” He kicked off his shoes. “I guess I’ll just chill here until you’re finished. Don’t be long,” he teased, “I might fall asleep if you take one of your epic showers.” 

“No one will bother you,” Chester assured him. He wanted to lean over and give Mike a kiss, but he could still taste chlorine on his lips, and it was a turn off. “I’ll be fast,” he stated again before he scooped up his clothes from the bed, and headed out the door. 

Mike wiggled up onto the bed,laying his head on Chester’s pillow and curling onto his side, his eyes resting on Chester’s closet door. _He’s so cute. Taking my shirt. That sounds like something I would do. Why don’t I have a shirt? I should take one of his shirts home with me._ He lay on the bed, one arm tucked up under Chester’s pillow, plotting which shirt of Chester’s he’d snag the next time he had an opportunity. _The black one with the blue butterfly. I love that shirt._

Down the hall, Mark was headed back to the room where he and Caleb had been earlier. He’d managed to lose one of his rings somewhere along the way, and if he didn’t search for it now, he’d forget. He grumbled to himself about it, just as he was passing Chester’s assigned room when he stopped. His cool gray eyes zeroed in on the door, which wasn’t quite closed all the way. 

He took a step closer, purposely slowing his breathing so he could listen. He stood there, still and concentrated before he put his hand on the doorknob. He licked his lips, thoughts of seeing something on the other side exciting him a little as he pushed on the door, and it swung open just enough for him to see Mike facing away from him on the bed. 

_The boyfriend._ He waited, his eyes trailing down Mike’s frame, from his head nestled on the pillow, down his arm, and his hip, which was showing rather nicely, and then down his legs and to his socked feet. _He’s got nice feet. He’s got a certain appeal to him. He’s shaped a little differently from the others. Chester’s really into him. Really into him. Maybe too much._ He stroked his fingers over his chin as he let himself take one more long look at Mike Shinoda, before he stepped away and headed back down the hall. 

****  
TBC


	18. House Rules

Chester half danced as he made his way down the upstairs hallway of YRS. He had gotten rid of his pool water soaked clothes so they could be cleaned and dried, and now he was feeling good. His socks slid across the white marble floor tiles without much effort and every now and again he’d throw in a snap of his fingers. 

He caught his reflection in a mirror that was hanging just a few feet from his assigned room and he smiled. He’d managed to style his mohawk back to the way he liked it - freshly spiked and all in place. He straightened out his plain white t-shirt and shimmied a little in his corduroy pants. He was comfortable, and he knew Mike was waiting just behind the next door for him. Thoughts of running into the room and tackling his lover to the bed crossed his mind as he stopped and considered his options. _Or I could seduce him properly. Kiss him over every part of his body. Take him on the bed. Then it will be our bed, just like at home._

That seemed like a good plan as Chester took a deep breath and opened the door. Mike was already on the bed, his back toward the door. Chester licked his lips as he hurried in and shut the door behind him. He crossed the room and got on the bed, snuggling himself right up against Mike’s backside before he finally said, “I’m back, did you miss me?”

Mike smiled as he felt Chester slide against him, his boyfriend’s clean from the shower scent drifting over them both. “Of course I did,” he murmured, reaching behind him to give Chester’s ass a little squeeze. “You always take forever in the shower.”

Chester pressed his lips and nose into the back of Mike’s neck, right under his hairline. He kissed him gently, his hand cupping Mike’s hip. “I like to be clean. And I had to do my hair. Can’t walk around this place with a flat mohawk like I do at home.” He shut his eyes and let his lips scrape over his boyfriend’s skin a little more, his piercing rolling and rubbing in a steady rhythm. 

“Mmmm…” Mike closed his eyes and enjoyed the way Chester’s lips and hand felt on his body. It had been a long day already, and he really wished Chester hadn’t committed them to dinner. He was ready to go home and get naked, the way they’d planned in the car earlier. He let Chester kiss on his neck some more before he said, “who cares what they think about your hair. I like it when I can touch it, when it’s all soft for me.” 

Chester’s hand clutched Mike’s hip a little tighter as he entangled their legs. “It just saves me from people’s comments. That’s all. I love that you like it like that,” he whispered as he picked his head up enough from the pillow to let his tongue come out and dab at the spot right behind Mike’s pierced ear. 

A shiver went down Mike’s spine as he felt Chester’s tongue on his favorite spot, the little place behind his ear that always unraveled any misgivings he had about locations or timing, or anything other than how quickly he could get Chester inside him. He knew this was all leading quickly somewhere it couldn’t, with a house full of people and dinner waiting. Still, it was impossible to silence the little moan that escaped as Chester teased him, “Ches… you know we can’t start this now,” he said breathlessly.

Chester maneuvered his fingers to snake up under the hem of Mike’s t-shirt, stroking over his belly. “Start what?” he asked, trying to keep the smile off his face as he petted kisses down the crook of his boyfriend’s neck and onto his shoulder. 

Mike covered Chester’s wandering hand with his own, most of his body working to convince him to push Chester’s hand lower instead of holding it captive where it was. “You know… _this_ ,” he said softly as he pushed his ass into Chester’s hips. “Unless you’re ready to go home, you’ve gotta stop teasing me. We can’t do this here.” 

“I don’t see why not,” Chester said as he pulled his hand free. He slid it up Mike’s side, taking his t-shirt along for the ride, and exposing Mike’s bare skin. Chester bucked his hips, his hidden partial erection on its way to being full on as he moved their bodies as one. “I love you,” he whispered close to Mike’s ear before he ducked his head enough to get a few quick licks of Mike’s newly uncovered skin. 

As much as his brain was telling him to resist, Mike couldn’t help but turn over on his back to give Chester better access for his wandering lips. _Okay, maybe just a little before dinner. It will make him want to get through the meal faster so we can go home. I’m ready to go home._ “I love you, too,” he said, closing his eyes as he reached down to feel along Chester’s back, pulling him closer.

Mike on his back was perfect as Chester shoved his hand the rest of the way up Mike’s shirt. He feathered his fingers over his collarbone, and then down to each nipple, one at a time. He made sure to squeeze them just the way Mike liked it - firm, but not rough. He made each one hard before he slid down Mike’s body to get to a better angle. “Why don’t you just take this off?” he asked, tugging at the shirt like it was a nuisance. 

“Because we have to go to dinner, you know that, Ches. You’re the one that said we were staying.” Mike wanted to run his hand over Chester’s hair but he knew his boyfriend wouldn’t approve. He could feel the temperature of the room rising as Chester played with him, knowing exactly what to do to get him to give in, all of the little touches and things that Mike liked best. “Can’t you get us out of it?” he whined, shifting his hips a little to try to create more contact between their bodies. 

Chester rocked Mike back so he was flat on the bed again before he sat up and swung his legs over, forcing Mike’s apart. Now he was perched between his boyfriend’s thighs. He smiled as he rolled his eyes. “We don’t have to go. They won’t even miss us,” he promised as he leaned forward, shoving Mike’s shirt up even more. He started at the base of his boyfriend’s neck, half kissing and half licking as he went down slowly, inch by inch. He lapped the salty taste from Mike’s skin, moaning as he went. One hand braced his weight, the other went to work on Mike’s lower half - rubbing over his leg, his hip, the belt on his jeans, every place that was close to the hard on Chester knew he was creating. 

It was over as soon as Mike felt Chester’s hand close to his belt. He reached down and made quick work of undoing his buckle and popping the button on his jeans, grabbing Chester’s hand as he silently gave in, placing his boyfriend’s fingers on his zipper. He could feel his heart beating rapidly. One part of him wanted to forget where they were and just go for it, and the other part of him was anxious over the fact that they were at YRS still. Mike looked down at the top of Chester’s head and then over at the closed door. “Ches… did you lock your door when you came in?”

Chester’s dark eyes looked up, but only for a second before he went back to work on sliding Mike’s zipper down. “There’s no locks on the doors. House rule,” he mumbled without care. He pulled back enough to slide both hands up around Mike’s hips so he could grab the waistband of his jeans and get them off. 

“Wait, no locks?” Mike focused his eyes on the door even as he lifted his hips to help Chester with his jeans. “How can that be a rule? Chester… maybe this should wait for later.” 

Chester already had Mike’s jeans off his hips and was working on getting them down his thighs. He had a spectacular view of Mike’s flannel patterned underwear, and he had to smile before he looked up to meet his boyfriend’s worried face. “It’s okay,” he said with a shrug. “It’s just the way it is. Our rooms aren’t allowed to have locks. But no one is coming in here,” he assured him before he tugged a little more, scooting back as he did. 

It wasn’t exactly the reassuring news Mike was hoping for, even as he let Chester pull his jeans off the rest of the way. There wasn’t any way for him to gauge how seriously anyone in this house took each other’s privacy, and the last thing Mike felt like doing was putting his body on display the way everyone else did so casually. Just as he was about to protest again, there was a light knock at the bedroom door. Mike froze where he was, waiting for Chester to say something.

Chester’s head dropped in frustration before he leaned over and kissed Mike’s naked knee. “Don’t worry, Sexy Boy,” he said with a grin, “I’m sure it’s nothing.” He waited a moment before he turned his head toward the door and shouted, “Yeah?!” 

“Can I come in?” Amir called through the door. He waited a moment, before he said slyly, “or are you _busy_ in there, Chester?”

“I’m busy!” Chester yelled back, before he let out a long breath. “Just hang on,” he told Mike before he eased himself off the bed. He shifted his pants, jiggling himself a little to a more comfortable position before he went and opened the door, just enough to peer out at Amir. “Yeah, we’re busy. What’s up?”

Amir caught the sight of Mike’s bare leg on Chester’s bed in the small crack in the door, and he smirked. “Dinner, you know, Mark’s rules. He sent me up here to get you.” He shifted his eyes to catch sight of Mike’s socked foot and glanced back at Chester. “Doesn’t look like you’re too busy to come eat. You know you better get your ass down there before he comes up here.” 

“Shit,” Chester whispered, his flushed cheeks fading. “You’re right, I don’t want him up here. Alright, we’re coming,” he assured his co-worker, before he waved Amir away and shut the door. He spun back around toward the bed. “Mike, come on, we need to go eat.” He put his hands on his hips, taking a few deep breaths, his body already calming down and landing back into its normal state of being. 

“Fuck,” Mike hissed as he reached for his jeans. “That’s what I get for giving in to you,” he fussed, “now I’m all horny and wanting your ass and I have to go sit through dinner with a bunch of people I don’t know.” He sighed, sliding into his clothes and getting himself presentable before he took a few steps toward Chester, grabbing him by the waist and planting a kiss right on his lips. “Don’t blame me if I’m moody at dinner. You started it.”

It was instinct. Chester didn’t think twice before he slung his arms around Mike’s neck in return. “Don’t hate me because you’re horny,” he chuckled as he kissed along Mike’s jawline. “We can pretend to eat and then get back at it,” he suggested, tickling his fingers over every piece of skin he could touch, even adding a slight tug to one of Mike’s gold hoop earrings. 

Mike mumbled something incoherent under his breath as sparks shot through his belly. Chester was just too good at turning him on. “C’mon, then, let’s go,” he said, taking a step back from Chester’s hands. “Let’s get this over with.”

Mike stepping away and the tone he’d just used meant he was serious. Chester sighed as he reached out his hand instead. “Okay,” he agreed, even though he would rather push Mike up against the wall and play a bit more. _But I really don’t want Mark showing up, so it’s better if we go anyway. That’s the smart thing to do._

Mike took his hand, and Chester led the way down the hall and then down the staircase. “We all eat together,” he explained as they went. “It’s house rules. If there’s a meal while you’re here, on the clock or not, you have to eat at the table with everyone.” 

Rules. House rules. So many rules. “How do you keep up with all these rules?” Mike wondered aloud, even though he didn’t mean to speak his thoughts. He frowned as they stepped into the dining room, which was alive with chatter from all the guys in the house. Mike wasn’t the least bit surprised to see Mark at the head of the table, and that the two empty remaining seats were to Mark’s right. He held back, waiting for Chester to make a move toward the table.

Mark was the first one to catch sight of Chester and his boyfriend lurking in the doorway. He raised his hand, waving it. “Chester, get your ass in here, we’re all waiting on you,” he half bellowed. Mark wasn’t a large guy, but his voice could boom like he was more gorilla than man. 

Chester nodded, and with Mike’s hand still cradled in his, he led the way to the table. “I think you’ve met everyone,” he said as he scanned the table - Amir and Ryan were sitting next to each other and then Devon, Josh, Caleb, and Toby. “Oh, except for Jason,” Chester realized when his eyes locked with his secondary boss. He stopped and cleared his throat, grabbing the attention of everyone at the table. The boisterous hoopla came to a halt as Chester said, “Jason, this is Mike Shinoda.” He waited a second before he added, “my boyfriend.” 

Mike nodded his head at Jason and said, “hi,” at the same time Jason smiled warmly at him and said, “nice to meet you, Mike.” For some reason, Jason didn’t creep him out the same way Mark did. _Maybe it’s because he’s so much younger… closer to our age than Mark’s, I think… or maybe it’s because we’ve got a little thing in common these other guys don’t have. I wonder if he’s Japanese? Korean? He’s Asian for sure, maybe Chester knows._ Mike glanced at Mark’s impatient stare and decided he’d ask later. All he wanted now was to make it through the meal as inconspicuously as possible.

“Alright, boys, come sit down,” Mark decided and with that, Chester didn’t hesitate. He took the seat next to his boss, and Mike sat down, Ryan on his other side. _He knows Ryan, so that’s good._

Before anything else could be said, Brad waltzed into the room, carrying an expensive bottle of white wine. “I knew it,” he said as he started to fill everyone’s glasses to the brim. “I had my head count right. Just hang in there, boys,” he said as he rounded the corner. “Lobster bisque will be out in just a minute.” He patted Toby on the shoulder as he passed him, and then Amir’s as well, before he disappeared into the kitchen. 

“He’s so funny,” Chester chuckled under his breath as he took a sip from his wine glass, letting the slightly bitter liquid run down his throat. His stomach rumbled and in that moment food was important. 

Mike quietly looked around the table, at what he assumed was mostly underage guys, all with wine glasses in hand as though it were completely normal. He shifted in his seat uneasily, unwillingly to lose his hold on the situation in front of him. He wasn’t like everyone else. He didn’t belong here, he didn’t have to follow what they were doing. He reached for his water glass and took as sip, catching Mark’s stare from the corner of his eyes.

“So, Mike,” Mark started, interlacing his fingers, “tell me, how do you like our home so far? Did Chester take you around to everything yet?” 

“I think so, sir. Everything is very nice.” Mike tried to keep his voice level, even though he found Mark intimidating. “Chester has been a good tour guide.” He reached under the table and squeezed Chester’s knee softly. 

Mark nodded, his cool gray eyes never leaving the couple. “Chester tends to be good at everything. That’s why we like him so much.” 

A second later Brad came back into the dining room, this time with a shiny silver cart that was carrying a massive serving bowl. The cook already had his ladle out as he went from person to person, filling their bowl with the steaming lobster bisque. With each dish served he was greeted with the sounds of hungry stomachs and appreciative thank yous and general satisfied noises. Each and every one of them made Brad smile as he kept himself from adjusting his hair net as he went around the table. 

“I’ve got cheddar and onion biscuits coming next,” he assured everyone as he watched them start to eat. 

Ryan watched as Brad served him, then Mike and then Chester. He waited for Brad to move on around to get to the other side of Mark before he leaned close to Mike. “Hey,” he whispered, “it’s cool you came up here with Chaz. I know it means a lot to him.” 

Mike looked up to catch Jason’s eyes, and he flushed under the other man’s gaze. _Everyone is watching me, that’s so weird. And now Jason’s probably wondering why Ryan’s over here whispering at me. Ugh._ He nodded as he looked down at the napkin in his lap. “I know,” was all he said, feeling uncomfortable.

Dinner smelled amazing and Mike picked up his spoon to give the bisque a try. Half of Chester’s bowl was already gone before Mike had even ventured a taste. He smiled and nudged Chester with his elbow. “Is it good, babe?” he asked in a low tone, trying to keep his conversation with his boyfriend somewhat private.

Chester nodded, another spoonful already in his mouth. It was hot and salty and fantastic. No words were needed. No words would do. He licked his lips before he turned to Mike and smiled. “Always good,” he replied, as Brad was coming around setting baskets of bread at either end of the table. Everyone grabbed for them, like they were the last bits of food left on the earth. 

“Don’t fight,” Brad stated. “I’ve got more. I’ve always got more. Anyone need more wine?” 

A ring of yes’s went around the table, and Brad fetched a new bottle before he started to refill everyone’s glasses, including Chester’s as he held it up. “Mike?” Brad asked, looking at his still-full glass, “are you not one for wine? I’ve got red, if you’d rather?” 

“No, no, that’s fine,” Mike said, wishing Brad hadn’t drawn attention to the fact that he wasn’t drinking. He could feel everyone’s eyes on him as he swallowed and tried to smile. “I’m just not much of a drinker,” he added casually.

“That’s not a problem,” the cook offered with a soft smile, his hand going out to rest on Mike’s shoulder. “If you’d like something else - orange juice, or I have a bunch of different soda options or milk or tea - the kitchen is full of pretty much everything.” 

Mike shook his head. “Water is perfect, Brad, thanks.” He waited for everyone to return to their own conversations again before he rested his hand on Chester’s forearm. “Ches, I don’t think you should have any more wine. You know… driving home and all… and…” he caught Chester’s eyes as he turned toward him. “You owe me something later, too.” He winked as he squeezed Chester’s arm. 

Mark set his wine glass down. “Home?” he questioned. “Chester, you and Mike should just stay here tonight. It’s already getting late. Drink as much as you want,” he stated, gesturing toward Chester’s half empty glass, “and don’t worry about going anywhere. I insist.” 

The alcohol was already sending little tingles through Chester’s legs and arms, his mind feeling a bit hazy. He looked over at Mike and then back at his boss. “Well, we were planning on going home,” he said before he took another drink, and then he sat it down. He reached his hand over to Mike’s leg under the table, ready to whisper something along the lines of _I’ll be fine for later, don’t worry_ but before he could, Mark was insisting for a second time that they stay. 

The table went a little quiet as everyone put their heads down, consuming their food in muffled slurps. 

Mike reached over and pushed Chester’s wine glass toward the center of the table, a bit further from his boyfriend’s reach. “That’s very nice of you to offer, sir, but Chester and I are going home after dinner. We’ve already made plans for the evening.” He met Mark’s eyes but immediately looked away, feeling as though he had crossed a dangerous line. 

Eyes popped up all around the table as Mark sat forward in his seat. He leaned his elbows on the table. “I see,” he grumbled. “Chester, is that what you want? It’s a long way back to the loft, I’m just thinking of _your_ best interest here.”

Chester felt his mind fumbling for an answer as he swayed slightly in his seat. It took a few seconds before he got his tongue to work and he looked away from everyone staring at him. “Yeah, we’re going to head out after this. Sorry, Mark, but Mike’s right. We’ve got plans for tonight. We’ll stay some other time.” 

Mark’s eyes narrowed before he sat back. He flashed Jason a quick glance before he said, “Okay, well, if that’s what you want, I’ll make a note of it.” He picked up his wine glass and took a long sip, before he went back to his food.

Chester watched him for a minute. _Dammit. He’s pissed at me now. Maybe we should just stay. I’d rather stay than be on Mark’s shit list._ He snuck a peek Mike’s way; his boyfriend was busy eating now, gobbling up his bisque. _I wonder if I can talk him into staying? It’s just one night. We’ve been here this long._

Brad was bringing in another round of biscuits. He was just about to comment on Chester’s healthy appetite when something in Mike’s bowl of lobster bisque caught his eye. He gasped, and instantly covered his mouth, but it was too late. Everyone was staring. 

“Brad? What’s wrong?” Devon asked, flipping his dark hair from his eyes as he stared up at the cook. 

“Nothing,” Brad dismissed quickly before he laid his hand on Mike’s shoulder and squeezed it. He leaned down. “Mike,” he tried to whisper, even though everyone could hear him, “would you step into the kitchen for a moment, please?” 

Mike looked around the table and then at Chester, who just shrugged at him. He felt his ears turning pink as his mouth for some reason agreed, “okay,” and he stood up, placing his napkin next to his bowl. Brad seemed fine, a little quirky, but fine, and Mike was genuinely curious about the chef’s reaction to whatever it was he’d seen. 

He followed Brad into the kitchen and stood there, watching as Brad paced a little bit. “What’s up?” 

Brad stopped himself. He smoothed his hands down the front of his white chef’s jacket. He leaned a little to the left, peering out the doorway to make sure no one was paying them any attention. “I had to bring you in here,” he whispered, slashing his hand through the air. “Mark doesn’t like me to talk about my gift.” He took a deep breath, and then he let it out slowly before he reached for both of Mike’s shoulders, holding him. “I saw something in your bisque. Mike, I saw your future.” 

For the first time since he’d stepped foot in YRS, Mike genuinely cracked a smile at someone other than Chester. “My future?” he gasped with a bit of a laugh. “Okay, sure. Tell me all about it.”

“It wasn’t an extremely clear picture of things. Lobster bisque is kind of a heavy soup,” Brad stated very seriously, his bushy eyebrows pressed together. “But what I do know is that in the very, very near future you are going to be making a life changing decision.” He let go of Mike’s shoulders to poke him right on the chest. “Lobster bisque doesn’t lie, Mike. When it speaks, you listen.” 

Mike raised an eyebrow as he listened to Brad. _He really believes what he’s saying. I should try to be serious back. No need to make the chef mad, not when I love to eat._ “Well, okay. A life-changing decision. Hmmm… I wonder what in the world that could be. That’s all you saw?” Mike put both hands on his hips as he thought it over. “That could be anything. But thanks for the warning. I’ll be on the lookout.” He turned to go back into the dining room, shaking his head a little. 

He’d only been gone a few minutes, but when he returned, Chester, Mark, and Chester’s wine glass were missing. Mike glanced around at the subdued chatter from the other guys as he took his seat, frustrated that his only option was to address Ryan. He leaned close to the other man, who was quietly talking with Amir. “Ryan? Where’d Chester go?”

Ryan looked over, meeting Mike’s concerned stare. “Mark took him. . .out,” he said, pointing toward the doorway, which led down the hallway. “He seemed a little pissed. He made Chester go. Look, Mike, I know this is your first time here.” He paused for a moment, looking across the table at Jason before he went on, “but the general rule is to not rock the boat. If Mark asks for something, you do it. It’s just easier that way. Chester’s been here long enough,” he said with a shrug. “He knows how it goes, which is probably what Mark’s reminding him of right now.” 

With that, he left his spoon in his bowl and shoved it away. He took a swallow from his wine glass before he said, “Come on, cheer up. You can manage a night here with all of us. We’ll play nice.” He offered a smile, but he dropped it and turned back to his wine when Mike didn’t smile back at him. 

Mike picked up his spoon, his stomach feeling the familiar anxiety he always felt when thinking of YRS. _I don’t want to stay here, I want to go home. I don’t understand everyone. They should all have the right to go home when they want to. I’ve never heard of working somewhere that you aren’t allowed to leave._ He frowned into his soup bowl as he waited for Chester to come back. 

He finished his dinner right as Chester came back into the dining room, with Mark right behind him. Mike glanced up in time to see the now empty wine glass being set on the table, and he made a face as he looked at his boyfriend.

“Hey,” Chester said, as he pulled his chair out. He sat down, but not directly at the table. “I told Mark we’d go ahead and stay.” He was doing his best to keep his voice low, to keep it just between him and Mike as he faced him, his back to his boss. “I know it’s not what we planned, but. . .” he ducked his eyes, his brain swimming. “We can have fun here. Let’s go get some trunks on and we can hit the hot tub.” He reached his hand out to rest it on Mike’s body - his side, his arm, his leg - anywhere would do. 

“But…” Mike blew out a frustrated breath, refusing to look over at Mark, feeling the boss’ eyes on the two of them. “Fine. Fine, Chester, we’ll stay. But we’re leaving first thing tomorrow morning. No arguments.” He took Chester’s roaming hand and held it tight. “Do you _really_ want to get in the hot tub? Or do you think that you _should_? Because we don’t have to do that, you know.” He tried to catch Chester’s eyes, but he was staring down at their linked hands.

Chester nodded before he looked up. He could feel his face was flushed from the alcohol. He tugged at his t-shirt. “I’m hot,” he said, “and so is the hot tub. It makes sense. I think.” He stopped for a minute before he shrugged his shoulders. “It’s good for stress relief,” he decided. “Come on, I’m ready to be away from everyone.” He tossed Mike an almost sexy look as he wiggled his eyebrows, but he was a little too intoxicated to pull it off flawlessly like he usually could. 

Frowning, Mike stood up and pulled Chester up with him. “I told you enough wine,” he reprimanded lightly, softly in Chester’s ear. “What am I going to do with you?” he asked as he turned to lead them upstairs. 

“I’ll sober up,” Chester half giggled as he let himself be led. He was feeling a little dizzy until they got to the bedroom, and then his senses started to sharpen slightly as he went to the dresser. “It will be okay. Look what I got, Sexy Boy.” He spun around, two pairs of swimming trunks in his hands - one black and one red. “Take your pick.” 

“Black,” Mike said, reaching for them both and tossing them on the bed. He stepped closer to Chester, both hands going for the waistband of his pants. “You seem like you could use some help with these,” he murmured, his frustration from downstairs dissolving as he looked at his boyfriend. _He really does look like he needs some help. Too much wine._

Chester’s arms stayed slack at his sides, his body swaying a little. “Okay,” he agreed easily. “You can take my clothes off any time you want.” He leaned forward, letting his lips press to Mike’s ear. “It’s not so bad, right? Staying.” 

Mike unbuttoned Chester’s pants and let them slide off his hips, reaching to push them down a bit as he backed Chester against the bed and made him sit down. “I guess I can do one night, Ches, but I’m not happy about it. You let Mark tell you what to do far too much.” He knelt down and pulled Chester’s pants off, tossing them on the floor. With both hands on Chester’s knees, he leaned forward and placed a couple of tiny kisses to the inside of his boyfriend’s thigh. “I really, really wanted to go home and get naked in our bed, you know.” Mike waited a second, then stood up to take Chester’s t-shirt off. “I thought you did, too.” 

Chester nodded as he allowed Mike to pull his shirt up and over his head. “I did. I do. It’s just. . .he’s my boss, Mike.” He shrugged his shoulders, looking down at his hairy legs. “It’s just the way it is. It’s easier to do what he asks then make a fuss about it. And we can get naked here,” he offered as he looked up. “We can shove a chair against the door, if that will make you feel better.” 

Rolling his eyes, Mike reached for the red swim trunks and handed them over. “Here, put these on,” he said as he unbuckled his own belt, turning away from Chester to change his own clothes. “We’ll see about getting naked here… it seems… creepy.” He considered taking his t-shirt off and decided he’d do that downstairs. No need to walk through the house without his shirt on. He’d been stared at enough for one evening.

“Why creepy?” Chester asked as he slipped his underwear off and pulled the trunks on, all while staying put on the edge of the bed. “I know it’s not home, but sex doesn’t always have to be at home. Hey, what did Brad want to tell you in the kitchen?” he asked before he let his body fall back onto the bed and he closed his eyes as he listened to Mike moving around a few feet away. 

“Oh, something about life experiences, or life altering changes, or something like that,” Mike answered dismissively. “I don’t believe in that kind of stuff, I was just humoring him. Come to think of it, it was all probably just a way to distract me to get you out of the room with Mark.” Mike turned and looked at Chester through narrowed eyes. “Would he do that? Brad?” 

Chester turned his head in Mike’s direction, his eyes easing open. “Brad can see the future,” he stated with certainty. “What life altering change did he see? And he’s Mark’s cousin. They don’t really get along though. Brad wants to go be a real chef somewhere, but he owes Mark. That’s why he’s cooking for us instead.” 

“God, everything here is about Mark,” Mike grumbled, yanking his swim trunks up. “I don’t know what he saw, he wasn’t specific. It’s easy to be right when you don’t really say anything,” Mike reasoned. “I’m not going to worry about it. Do you think you can go down, or do you need a few more minutes up here?” He sat down on the side of the bed next to Chester, wrapping an arm around his back and nuzzling his face into his boyfriend’s neck. “Sorry to be so cranky, I just really wish we were at home.” 

A splash of relief washed over Chester’s insides. “It’s my fault for ruining our evening,” he said, nuzzling Mike in return. “You’re probably right, I let Mark order me around too much, but it’s. . .I’m just trying to survive the next two years. I hope you understand.” He let out a long sigh and said, “I can go now. My head is clearing. The night air will help.” 

_Two years,_ Mike thought wearily. It was a long time to put up with Mark being in control. “C’mon, then, let’s go knock this out so we can go to bed. I hope it’s as relaxing as you say it’s going to be. I’m not in the mood for dunking games and playing around.” 

Chester sat up, his head rushing slightly. “Naw, not in the hot tub. I’m sorry about the guys earlier, too.” He rubbed the side of his face as he slowly got to his feet. “It’s usually just crazy around here, but the hot tub is more of a down area. Everyone knows it.” 

Mike nodded, standing and holding his hand out for Chester to take. 

**** 

TBC


	19. After Dark at YRS

The jets shot warm, bubbly water all around them as Mike and Chester sat side by side in the hot tub. It was separate from the pool area, but only by twenty feet or so. A partial wooden lattice barrier kept it hidden from view, even though from the hot tub you could spy on anyone getting into the pool. 

Chester was still feeling a little tipsy as he watched the bubbles. The sun was already going down, and the light outside had turned a dark shade of pink. He knew that once true darkness settled in, a soft light would automatically flip on just to the right of the hot tub, but it was still a little early for that. “So,” he said, his fingers playfully skipping across the foamy surface of the water till they landed right on Mike’s naked chest, “didn’t I tell you this was relaxing? And look, no one can really see us.” 

Mike was sitting right in front of one of the jets, letting the water pound into his back. He looked around before he answered, “yeah, it’s relaxing. But I’m sure we’re being watched, by someone. Your bedroom isn’t the only one that overlooks the pool.” He raised one hand out of the water and pointed toward the windows across the courtyard. “Don’t tell me you’ve never stood up there and watched what was going on out here.” 

Chester rolled his head, letting it rest on Mike’s shoulder. The water was warm, and the jets were pulverizing his legs and a small part of his back under the surface. He was almost on the edge of feeling weightless. “Of course I have,” he admitted with a sheepish grin, his hand still on Mike’s chest, but now he was tracing small circles around the dark nipple that was closest to him. “But I’m not a stalker or anything. It’s like...people watching. Like bird watching, only different. I don’t mean anything by it. Just passing time. Usually watching the guys shove each other under the water.” His face brightened a little. If there was one thing he liked about YRS, it was his room. He had one of the best views in the house. 

The way Chester was touching him, the attention he was giving his body while pretending to be otherwise occupied, was distracting. Mike let his head rest on the back of the hot tub as Chester’s fingers pinched at his nipple. “Ches, I don’t want to be watched. Just the thought freaks me out. Even though that feels really good,” he admitted, closing his eyes for a second. He couldn’t let Chester escalate things outside of the closed door of his bedroom, whether it felt good or not.

Chester waited a moment. He picked his head up off of Mike’s shoulder to watch as his boyfriend sat with his neck outstretched and his eyes closed. He looked like a plate of chocolate cake ready to be devoured. “Okay,” he offered, leaving Mike’s now-hard nipple alone. He slid his hand down his boyfriend’s side instead, letting it disappear under the chaotic bubbles. “No one can see this,” he whispered as he leaned close. 

He started at Mike’s thigh, but his hand quickly found its way up into the floppy opening of the swimming trunks that were being pushed around by the jets. Chester pressed his lips to Mike’s shoulder, while his hand under the water quickly came into contact with Mike’s limp penis. He handled it carefully, caressing it at first before he rubbed his thumb over the head. “Tell me to stop,” Chester whispered, kissing down Mike’s arm, his wet lips making little suction noises as he went. 

“Stop,” Mike said, but it was half-hearted at best. He knew there was no way anyone could see what Chester was doing under the water, but his face wasn’t underwater, and he wasn’t going to be watched. Just a few minutes, a little bit of stroking, couldn’t hurt, as long as he could control himself, get Chester to stop before it got too serious.

He slid down in the water a little bit, bringing his hand up behind Chester’s back and rubbing over his warm, wet skin underneath the bubbles. “Ches, just a few minutes, babe, we can’t do this in here.” Mike rolled his head to the side to see his boyfriend’s face.

Chester’s eyes were lidded as he nodded, his hand still working under the water. He let his fingers run up and down Mike’s shaft, generously stroking the underside of it, just the way his boyfriend loved. He sat forward a little, gaining better access and allowing for his kisses to go up Mike’s neck and to his jawline. “Don’t worry,” he mumbled between lip smacks, “I’ll stop whenever you tell me.” 

He could feel Mike shifting under the water, the jets playing a role as they gushed the soothing hot liquid everywhere around their bottom halves. “You know,” Chester said, a sly tone taking over his voice as he pulled back slightly, “I never thought about putting a hot tub on our list of places to have sex, but it could be interesting. Not right now,” he added, when he saw the look on Mike’s face. “But someday. If we ever have our own. That would be okay, right?”

“Everything is okay if it’s only between us… you know that,” Mike whispered, reaching to cup his hand around Chester’s chin. “I want everything you want. Maybe not exactly when you want it,” he smiled, thinking about how they would probably be having sex right now if he let Chester have what he wanted when he wanted it, “but I want you, always. And it does feel good in here, I admit it. You were right.” He leaned in, pressing his lips gently and quickly to Chester’s, his eyes flicking back over to the windows as he pulled back. 

“Chester’s always right.” Jason’s voice came from somewhere behind Mike, and he twisted around in surprise. “Glad to see you’re enjoying everything YRS has to offer, Mike,” he commented, tossing a towel onto a nearby chair.

Mike dropped his hand from Chester’s face, slipping it under the water and stilling Chester’s actions. He wasn’t even sure what to say as he was faced with the sight of Jason, completely naked, joining them in what was seconds ago a private moment in the hot tub. Mike looked at Chester, completely speechless.

“Hey, Jason,” Chester managed to say. His fingers were still curled around Mike’s dick, underwater and out of sight, even as his boyfriend had halted him from all his stroking. “What, ah, what are you doing?” 

“Exactly what you’re doing, Chazzy. Relaxing after a long day.” He flipped his hair away from his eyes, his gaze settling curiously on Mike. He hadn’t been able to talk to Chester’s boyfriend at all during dinner, and he wanted to know all about him. “Ryan should be down in a few,” he mentioned, settling down into the water across from them. “So, Mike. Shinoda? That’s what, Japanese?” Jason smiled charmingly at Mike, not missing the fact that he was holding Chester’s hand under the water.

Mike glanced at Chester. _His boss is sitting here in the hot tub with us, naked, and Chester hasn’t even blinked. What the fuck is going on here?_ “Um, yeah, actually. I’m half-Japanese. On my dad’s side.” He squeezed Chester’s arm under the water, trying to get his attention.

Chester smiled a little. He hadn’t really expected Jason to take an interest in Mike’s background, but as he thought about it, it made sense. On a lot of levels. He felt Mike squeeze his arm, and he looked his way. 

As soon as Mike caught Chester’s eyes, he looked pointedly over at the bedroom windows. _Surely he’ll get the point without me having to flat out say I’m ready to go upstairs._ Mike looked back at Chester and bit his lip, widening his eyes just a little. 

“I thought we might have that in common,” Jason said, pulling Mike’s attention back to him. “Believe it or not, I’m half-Japanese too, but on my mother’s side.” The conversation was meant to help make a connection between them, but Mike only looked at Jason like a caged animal. It was obvious he didn’t know what to say next. With a smile, Jason looked at Chester. “So, how did you guys meet?” 

Still nonchalantly holding Mike’s dick, Chester answered, “In karate class. My karate class, actually,” he clarified, his free hand pointing to himself. “Mike and I both know the owner of the karate club and he was trying to convince Mike to join, but it didn’t really take.” He tossed Mike a loving look and a partial smile. He hadn’t really had a chance to talk about his relationship much at work, since he’d always tried to keep the two very separate. This was a new feeling. 

Jason chuckled at the thought of Mike hating karate. It just seemed funny for some reason. As he was about to make a comment about it, he caught Ryan heading their direction from the corner of his eye. Any teasing he was about to unleash on the couple vanished as he watched his lover come closer. Being in the hot tub was the perfect excuse to spend time together, away from Mark’s prying eyes. “Hey, Ryan,” he said, careful not to shorten or sweeten his name in front of Mike. 

Mike took the opportunity of Jason’s distraction to remove Chester’s hand from his swim trunks and mouth in his boyfriend’s direction, “let’s go,” pointedly looking upstairs again.

They’d been sitting in that same position - side by side, dick in hand - for several minutes now and it was almost a surprise as Chester’s hand was pushed away and he let his boyfriend go. He lifted his hand out of the water and pressed it over the side of his head, his fingers wetting the short hairs. “Hey, Ryan,” he offered before he felt Mike elbow him under the water. This time he watched as Mike looked up toward the windows, and the message finally rang through. _Oh. He wants to go. But why?_ He looked across the small space at his boss and co-worker, who was just sliding into the water next to Jason. “I think we’re going to head out. Not that we don’t love spending time with you two,” Chester offered with a cheeky smirk toward Ryan. 

“Oh, I see how it is, Chaz,” Ryan shot right back. “I show up and you leave. I’m taking this personally.” 

“By all means, take it personally,” Chester teased back before he mustered his strength to stand up from the hot massage he’d really been enjoying. The night air pierced his skin and he shivered. 

Silently, Jason watched as Mike stood up and climbed out of the hot tub, instantly going for the towels they had brought out with them and slinging one over his shoulder before tossing one at Chester.

“Don’t forget to dry your trunks out good so you don’t drip on the floor and make a mess everywhere,” Mike said as he scrubbed the towel over himself.

“Ooh, Chazzy, do you always let him boss you around like this?” Jason asked, smirking as he watched the couple dry off together. 

If that comment would have come from Ryan, or any of the other guys, Chester would have went with his instinct and flipped him off. But it had come from Jason. His boss. So instead he forced a smile in their direction. “Usually. It’s sexy when Mike does it. Can’t say that for everyone.” 

It wasn’t the answer Jason expected, and he didn’t really have a comeback. He watched Chester for another moment as he carefully dried every part of his body, patting off his swim trunks, before he wrapped the towel around his waist. Something Jason had never seen him bother with before. His eyes slid back over to Mike, who was waiting impatiently, his towel over his shoulders and covering his chest. “Good thing you two decided to stay the night,” he finally said. “It’s past nine, Chester.”

If Chester would have had his watch on, he would have doubled checked the time. But he didn’t, and instead he found himself staring at his blue and red flame tattoo. “Is it?” he asked, looking up to meet Jason’s dark eyes. “I mean, I guess it doesn’t matter, right?” he spun around to look at Mike. They were spending the night, so who cared what time it was? 

Jason’s words had their intended effect on Mike, though, who stood worrying his bottom lip with his teeth. Even though he knew they were spending the night, knowing they were locked in to the grounds made Mike anxious. It was like being in prison, he imagined, his freedom to leave if he changed his mind taken away. 

“You’re right, it doesn’t really matter,” Jason said. “You two have a nice evening,” he said smoothly, watching as Mike stepped around the hot tub to follow Chester inside.

The air inside the house was even colder against their wet skin as they hurriedly made their way through the house and up the stairs. They passed Toby along the way, but he was on his phone, and had barely paid them attention. Once they were upstairs, and walking into Chester’s room, the mood shifted. Before they had been flirting. They had been kissing and touching and enjoying the hot tub. Even after Jason and Ryan had joined them, it had been a nice atmosphere, or at least Chester had thought so. He left his towel on, his mind working over if he and Mike should jump in the shower first before camping out in the bedroom for the rest of the night. _And snacks. We should raid the kitchen before we shut ourselves in._ “Well, that was Jason,” he said offhandedly, not meaning anything by it, but his boyfriend didn’t look impressed. 

“Yeah, _all_ of him,” Mike commented, his face furrowed in irritation. “I can’t believe your boss just walked out there and got in the hot tub naked. Naked, Chester, that’s not normal. Not to mention, he’d been standing there who knows how long listening to us.” Mike scrubbed his towel over his hair quickly, even though only the bottom by his neck had even touched the water. “I don’t get the constant state of undress around here.” 

Chester took a step back, shaking his head slightly. “You don’t have to get mad,” he said before he took a hard swallow. “And, I know that was probably a little shocking.” He pointed toward the window. “But that’s just Jason. He always does that. No big deal.” He shrugged, hoping they could move on from this and get to snacks and showers and nakedness. 

Mike sighed, tossing the towel to the floor before he looked at his boyfriend. “I’m not mad, Chester. I just… I mean, the lines just seem blurry to me, that’s all. If there’s supposed to be a separation between work and personal, why does it seem like it’s all one and the same to everyone else here except you? Do you act differently when I’m not here?” Mike cocked his head to the side, his eyes locked on Chester’s face to get his reaction to the question.

“I’m...I’m not sure what you mean,” Chester answered honestly. As far as he could tell, so far everything had gone well. Better than he’d expected. Other than they had to spend the night, that hadn’t been the plan, but that was minor. There were lots of times Chester had been ordered to stay over when he was supposed to go home. “I’m not doing anything wrong,” he defended as he searched Mike’s face for answers. “And it is separate. This is work. Home is home. I’m not seeing what you’re talking about.” 

With a shake of his head, Mike took a step forward, pulling Chester close to him by the waistband of his swim trunks. “I don’t know. The casual nudity, the underage drinking, the way you’re just… ordered around… it’s weird to me, babe, I’m just not comfortable with it. I just wish for a second you could see it from an outside perspective, see what I see. I want to get you out of this so badly. And I know,” he rushed on as he felt Chester tense up, ready to defend his contract yet again, “I know you can’t leave now. But I just feel like… sometimes… it’s okay to say no. You know? I’m just worried about you, that’s all.” He slipped his hands around Chester’s back and squeezed him lightly. “I love you, I want you all to myself. And sometimes… sometimes I just wonder how I fit into your life, really… if this your real life, or is your real life with me? I don’t know. I’m just being crazy, I guess.” 

Chester let his weight lean into his boyfriend’s arms. “I love you, too. And you don’t have to worry about me. I know it’s not a _normal_ work place. We’re not sitting at desks or answering phones. But it’s how YRS is.” He let out a sigh before he stepped back and out of Mike’s reach. “They’re good to us, Mike. Mark and Jason...they can be demanding,” he admitted, his eyes falling to the side, “but all in all, they’re good to us. And the guys, they’re nice enough. If we get someone in here who causes trouble, Mark’s usually quick to get rid of them. I…” He paused for a moment, Mike’s words flooding his thoughts. “I probably do act differently when you’re not here. I know you’re not into all this stuff, the swimming and the rough housing. I’m on my way to getting too old for it, but it still happens. And the drinking, that’s normal.” He looked up to catch Mike’s eyes, figuring he probably should have left that last part out. 

Even though it felt wrong, Mike nodded. “Promise me that you’ll tell me if anything gets out of hand, Chester. I know you say that they’re good to you - and maybe comparatively, they are - but I still worry about you when you’re here. I don’t know why, I just do.” He ventured a bit of a smile as he looked at Chester. “Maybe I’m just feeling overprotective or something. It’s probably because you’re so fuckin’ hot.” 

Chester’s face lit up. “Yeah?” he asked, the comment hitting him by surprise, even though he knew how Mike felt about him. He licked his lips, his tongue rolling over his lip ring. “I guess that makes us even, Sexy Boy.” He took a step forward, lacing his arms around Mike’s neck before he leaned in and kissed him. He could still taste the very un-sexy hot tub water that had managed to get all over both of them. Even on their parts that hadn’t been submerged. “Want to go take a shower with me?”

“Let’s make it quick,” Mike breathed, his body remembering the way Chester had been stroking him in the hot tub the moment their lips met. “No messing around in the shower. Just business.” 

“Well that’s no fun,” Chester smirked before he let his boyfriend go. “But okay. There’s no locks on the bathroom doors anyway, so it’s probably better if we keep it _just business_.” He turned around to head for the closet, figuring a new shower meant a new outfit for the night. 

“You better grab me something while you’re in there, Ches. I’ve got nothing. And do any rooms in this place have locks? Add that to the list of things that are weird - lack of privacy in places you should have it. Bedrooms, bathrooms…” Mike’s voice trailed off as he watched Chester’s back side, his eyes taking in the way the damp swim trunks were stuck to the curve under his boyfriend’s ass.

“Mark and Jason’s room has a lock,” Chester said as he shifted through the small closet, shoving hangers and his limited collection of shirts around. “And there’s a room downstairs with a lock, but we’re not allowed in there.” His eyes zeroed in on the flannel shirt he’d stolen from his boyfriend months ago. He took it off the hanger along with two black t-shirts. He shut the closet door. “You can wear this,” he said holding up the flannel and one of the t-shirts. “And if you dig through the dresser, there’s underwear, socks, and pajama pants. Just like at home,” he instructed as he pointed. 

Mike turned to the dresser, locating all of the requested items quickly. At least Chester was as organized here as he was at home. “Okay, I’ve got everything. You ready?” He didn’t even bother to grumble over how Mark got a lock when everyone else didn’t. It wasn’t worth it.

****

Mike stretched out over the bed, watching Chester move around the room, getting ready to call it a night. He watched as Chester plugged both their phones in, shutting off the ringers, then flicked off the overhead light. The soft glow of the lamp was the only light as Chester shut the closet door all the way and climbed into bed. Immediately Mike reached for his flat mohawk, running his hand over the damp hair and smiling.

“You’re so cute when your hair is like this,” he murmured, twisting the red strands between his fingers.

“Mmmmmm,” Chester moaned softly from behind his lips. “Don’t stop.” It was the first time they’d really laid down in this bed together, and even though Chester had worked hard to keep his professional and personal lives separate, he couldn’t deny that he loved the feel of Mike’s body beside him here. In this room. In this house. He could still smell the ocean breeze soap they’d used in the shower, and the green apple scented shampoo they’d hijacked from one of the cabinets. The window was open, and the night air was all around them, leaving the room feeling like a small slice of paradise. 

Mike shifted closer, running his lips down Chester’s neck softly, keeping one hand twirled in his hair. “You’re so bad, you’ve been tempting me all day, you know. I was really looking forward to going home.” He nipped his teeth on Chester’s ear lightly and tugged his hair gently. “What are we going to do about that?” 

Chester reached a hand over, stroking the hip of Mike’s pajama bottoms. “Sounds to me like you already know what we’re going to do about that.” He grinned before he turned onto his side. Their bodies lined up as they shifted them into place - crotches touching, bellies almost against each other and face to face. “You’re the boss, Sexy Boy,” Chester cooed, his voice light and willing. “Tell me what you want.” 

“I know it’s crazy, but I want you.” Mike flexed his fingers in Chester’s hair and looked at him. “You promise nobody is coming in here?”

Chester’s lust-struck eyes opened a little wider as his brain kicked in. “They shouldn’t,” he said almost immediately. “Usually people knock. Like I said before, I can move that chair over in front of the door.” He pointed across the room to the high end piece of furniture with the tall back and dark gray material, which was cast in more shadows than light, the place Mike had discarded his flannel shirt for the evening. 

“Don’t get up,” Mike said, finally letting go of Chester’s hair and latching that hand onto his hip, pulling them tight together. “If you say people will leave us alone, I’ve got to trust you on that, right?” He wiggled his hips just a little before he ducked his head and captured Chester’s lips in a slow, wet kiss. He wanted to stop thinking, stop worrying, forget his misgivings over everything at YRS, and just melt into Chester’s arms. He sucked on the lip ring for a moment before he pulled away and whispered, “make me forget where we are.”

Mike’s seductive tone sent tingles up and down Chester’s body. That was it. No more questions or permissions were needed. Chester’s hand slid up and under Mike’s t-shirt. At home, they wouldn’t have had nearly as many clothes on to start with, but they weren’t at home. Chester’s heart was already starting to beat a little faster as he kissed his boyfriend under his chin, and then down his neck. “I don’t like this shirt,” he mumbled before he sat up, his brown eyes already popped with arousal as he stared down at his lover. 

Without a word, Mike tugged his t-shirt off, wadded it up, and threw it in the direction of the chair. Then he reached for Chester’s, tugging at the hem. “No point in waiting, let’s just get this one off too,” he rasped, his voice thick with desire. It was never hard to convince Chester to lose an article of clothing, and Mike pulled it off quickly and tossed it away with the other shirt. “Better?”

Chester looked down at himself, at his exposed flat stomach and the cotton pajama bottoms that almost mirrored the ones Mike had on. “No,” he said before he looked up. “No, I don’t like this.” He turned away, and scooted off the bed. “I say if we’re going to be doing this, then we might as well lose everything now.” The room was pretty dark, but he flashed Mike a smile anyway, knowing the bedside lamp was enough. He quickly pulled his pajama pants down, along with his underwear. He stepped out of them, leaving them where they lay before he jumped back onto the bed, and crawled right on top of Mike.

He pushed his boyfriend back onto the bed. “Mind if I help you with these?” he asked, his fingers fluttering right over Mike’s hidden cock. 

“Go right ahead,” Mike said, watching as Chester pushed down his pajama bottoms and underwear all together, leaving them both completely naked, the way they had both been waiting for since before they’d ever stepped foot in the house. He smiled, his eyes drifting over Chester’s tattoos, and he reached for him, pulling him down and nestling his boyfriend between his legs. The sensation of their skin sliding together was perfect, and Mike feathered his fingers down Chester’s sides until his hands landed on his little round ass, pulling them together. “You feel so good,” he breathed, looking up at Chester’s smile.

Their bodies rocked together, their hardened cocks rubbing against each other, sharing fluids and sensations. “You do too,” Chester husked back as he lowered his head right to Mike’s ear. He kissed him gently at first, savoring the taste of his skin and the familiar way his earlobe held the hoop earring that Chester loved to tease with his tongue. 

He pressed his hips down a little more, and Mike’s legs spread a little wider as Chester kissed his way from Mike’s ear, to around his jawline, and then to his lips. His eyes were shut, his mind off as he enjoyed Mike’s hands on his ass. As he joined their mouths together in the rhythm they had created together over the months. There was no one he liked to kiss more. No one like Mike Shinoda. He was the only one that mattered. 

Mike was well on his way to forgetting everything around him but Chester. As they kissed he drew his hands up over his boyfriend’s back, feeling along his skin, listening to the little hitches in his breathing as he touched sensitive spots, or ticklish spots. He let Chester’s kisses consume him for a while, deep, long, loving kisses, before he turned his lips away, kissing up underneath Chester’s chin for a moment. Mike lavished some attention on both sides of his neck before he whispered, “I want you, Ches, I’m tired of waiting. Just like this, where I can see you, where I can kiss you. You have lube here, somewhere?”

Chester’s eyes opened as he tried to think. “Yeah,” he mumbled before he lifted himself off of Mike, their bodies damp with the small amount of sweat they’d already managed to work up. He sat back on his bottom, his hand instinctively going to his own cock as he rubbed himself. “I think it’s in the nightstand.” He didn’t wait for Mike to move or to make any sort of comment before he was twisting around and leaning over the side of the bed. He got the drawer open, and just like at home, there was his favorite brand of lube. “Yup, here it is,” he announced quietly. He sat himself back up and maneuvered around to get in between Mike’s legs. By the dim light of the lamp, he coated two of his fingers first before he set the bottle aside. “Relax,” he whispered as he gently pushed on one of Mike’s thighs, opening him up a little wider. He rubbed one finger around the target area, but his access wasn’t the best with Mike’s ball sack being in the way. “Sexy Boy,” he called as he looked up from his work to see Mike with his head back. “Lift your legs up.” 

Mike cracked an eye open, focusing on Chester’s face as he reached down and looped a hand under his knee, pulling his leg toward his chest. “Better?” He wasn’t sure he was making access any easier. “Maybe we should slide a pillow under my hips?” All he knew was he was anxious and ready, and if he had to turn over he’d do it, but he mostly wanted to kiss his boyfriend more than anything else. 

“Okay, go ahead,” Chester said with a nod and Mike was quick to take one from Chester’s abandoned side of the bed. With the pillow in place, and Mike’s one leg still raised, access was no longer an issue. Chester circled his lubed finger around Mike’s opening a few times before he pushed it in, being mindful of Mike’s breathing and each noise he made. They’d been doing this for months - fingers and dicks and penetration. Chester knew how to read his boyfriend, and he could hear the need in Mike’s gasps steadily building. 

There was no discussion. A second finger slid right inside Mike’s bottom, and Chester leaned forward, letting his lip ring tease the head of Mike’s dripping cock. He sucked on it here and there, taking each bit of pre-cum that came his way as he moved his fingers in and out, and scissored them a little. He wanted to stretch Mike just right, so their next transition would be blissful for them both. 

It was good, it was always good now, every movement that Chester made to prepare Mike for what was coming. He twisted his head side to side as he felt Chester’s fingers, then his mouth, bringing his hand back up to caress the top of his boyfriend’s head. Mike was barely holding on to the conscious thought that they were not at home, trying hard to stifle his louder moans as he grew more impatient. “Ches, that’s enough, I’m ready,” he moaned, pulling at Chester’s shoulder, his ear, stroking the side of his face. “Come here.” He was ready to feel Chester inside of him, ready to forget everything but the pleasure they always brought each other. He wanted to taste his kisses and breathe every bit of his scent into his lungs. It was time, and he wanted Chester to make love to him, right here in this bed that wasn’t their bed. He wanted him to think about this every night that Mike wasn’t with him. 

Chester carefully pulled his fingers out. He leaned back on his knees, stroking himself for a moment, tugging in all the right places as he drank in the sight of his boyfriend. Mike’s legs were open, his erection perfect. Chester groped for the bottle of lube, and after lathering himself heavily in it, he tossed it away again. 

He crawled forward, keeping his weight balanced with one arm. His other hand was around his dick, guiding himself toward the final destination. His eyes were shut with concentration as he tried to feel his way around, but it didn’t take long. They were old pros at this part. Chester petted his lips over Mike’s neck as he felt the tip of his cock slide in. Mike’s body tensed, and Chester stopped. Waiting. “Tell me when,” he breathed into Mike’s ear before he kissed him some more, letting his lips mold over every inch of earlobe and cartilage. 

Mike sucked in a breath, focusing on the feeling of Chester’s lips at his ear rather than the pressure below, pushing against Chester’s dick and trying to relax. He’d gotten better at this part, but it was always the hardest for him, the waiting as his body adjusted and opened up to his lover. He turned, catching Chester’s lips in a heated kiss, pressing his tongue forward and feeling over every part of his mouth, greedily sucking him in. This was what he wanted, the kissing, the connection, tonight. He cupped a hand around Chester’s cheek, breaking their kiss long enough to say, “I’m good, it’s good,” encouraging him to move as he brought their lips back together. 

Chester pressed himself further, and the sensation of Mike’s inner walls hugging his shaft as he eased in, was fantastic. It sent sparks through every sexual neuron Chester owned. He pushed until he knew he was all the way in, his eyes closed, his lips under Mike’s control. He stayed where he was, but not for long. He pulled back, and then pushed in. Back and then in, at the slow steady pace that felt good. The desire to go faster, to pound his lover as hard as he could was strong, but he willed his body into submission. He kept it slow, building the speed as Mike clutched at his back. As his nails dug into his skin. 

It wasn’t going to take long. Not like this. Not with Mike’s mouth sucking him in, and the feel of total surrender of his boyfriend’s body under him. Chester’s mind was already flashing through the familiar images that popped up right about this time, right about the time he pushed in a little further and he bumped against Mike’s prostate. Images of his boyfriend naked. In the bed. In the shower. In their apartment. Images of Mike sitting with him on the couch, the ocean air ruffling his blue hair as he whispered, “I love you, Ches.” 

“Ahhhh, right there, Ches, yessss,” Mike threw his head back as he felt Chester nearing his climax. He knew, when his arms started to shake, when his thrusts became longer and deeper, that he was almost finished. Mike dug his nails into Chester’s hip, meeting each thrust and pulling them together tightly. He felt Chester’s lips in the crook of his neck, his panting breaths warm against his skin. It was perfect. He was almost there, too. 

They rocked together, Mike’s heels digging into the bed as he held steady against Chester’s body, allowing every thrust to scoot him up the pillow a bit more. He felt each tickle, each bit of pressure on his prostate, each thrust sprinkling stars behind his eyelids. He stopped trying to hold back, to prolong the ecstasy any more, and with one more deep push against his insides, Mike felt the pressure that had built from his toes all the way through his body release in a swift gush, a huge wave that spread cum all between his body and Chester’s. It was a warm wave of pleasure through his body, each ripple slightly smaller than the one before it until he was wrung out, clinging to Chester as he felt his muscles clench around his boyfriend’s cock. 

The rush was coming. Chester could feel the walls holding it back crumbling the moment the warm gush of Mike’s semen smeared between them. Now, Chester had only seconds. He had less than seconds as the beautifully building pressure in his balls tightened and then released, shooting Chester’s orgasm into overdrive. He grabbed Mike’s head, his arm wrapping around his neck and pulling him up slightly. “Fuuuuck,” Chester moaned as his release spilled all over the inside of his lover’s body. He kept going, letting everything ride out, Mike’s face still tight against his chest.

Mike gasped for air against Chester’s skin, feeling the warmth between them and inside of him, feeling Chester’s heartbeat furiously against his cheek. He felt the pulse of their lower halves together, the sweat in his hair, Chester’s fingers curled in the blue strands. He didn’t want to move, didn’t want to disconnect from each other, not yet. He turned his lips into Chester’s sweaty skin and placed a gentle kiss next to his heart, tasting the salt there. “God, I love you,” he breathed, squeezing Chester close. 

The air was thick. It felt hot, and Chester was struggling to let Mike go. He could feel himself shaking. Trembling. His legs didn’t feel steady as his knees ached into the mattress. He wanted to say something back, but his throat hurt as he breathed with his mouth open. His body was taxed, and for whatever reasons, his emotions were too. It was different from when they did this at home, and trying to understand why wasn’t helping as he kept his fingers clutched in Mike’s damp hair. 

Mike felt the trembling, the shaking, in his boyfriend’s body, and he smoothed a few more kisses across his chest. Petted his hands down his back. Breathed out a long, calming breath. “It’s okay, Ches, I’ve got you,” was all he could think to say. They lay together silently for a few more moments, returning to reality.

Chester felt his breathing slow and fall in line with Mike’s. His fingers unclutched, as he lifted himself, being careful to pull out slowly, his wilted erection giving no resistance. He sat back, first on his knees, and then down on his bottom. “I’m sorry,” he said, taking a swallow that hurt. “I’m not sure...I just lost it there for a minute.” He looked away and across the room toward the door. “I think I freaked myself out. It’s different being here with you. Not...being in front of cameras while in this house. I don’t know. It was overwhelming. But, like, in a good way.” 

“It’s okay... it’s just me and you in here. Right? The way it’s supposed to be, just between us, Chester. I love you,” Mike stated again, his worried eyes on his boyfriend. “I’m not going anywhere.” He hoped reassurance was all Chester needed. 

Chester looked up, meeting Mike’s black eyes through the dark, and he smiled. “I love you too,” he said first. “I tell you, Sexy Boy, I’m worn out.” He leaned back, letting his body stretch, which was about the time he realized he had cum all over his stomach. “I need to go pee,” he announced as he slowly started to get up. He looked back at the bed, at Mike’s still concerned face. “I’m okay,” he assured him. “I just got into a weird emotional place for a few minutes, but I’m fine. I’ll bring something back to clean you off if you want to stay in here.” 

Mike nodded, stretching his hands over his head before he reached down and slid the pillow out from under his ass. “Don’t be long,” he said, his eyelids feeling heavy. “I’m ready to crash… as long as you promise you’re good. Go do your thing, I’ll lay here and try not to make a bigger mess.” He smiled sleepily at Chester, watching him move toward the door. 

Chester reached for the doorknob but stopped. He looked down at himself. _Shit. We’re not at home. I need clothes on._ He let out a frustrated tired sigh before he headed back toward the bed. He wasn’t going to be picky. The first thing he found, that was going to be his outfit to the bathroom. As luck would have it, he scooped up his pajama bottoms. He didn’t bother to find underwear as he pulled them on, hopping toward the door on one leg as he did. 

“I’ll just be a few minutes,” he managed to say before he got his pants on and he opened the door. The light in the hallway was almost blinding, and he squinted as he crept out and pulled the door partially closed. He didn’t even get the chance to turn to head for the stairs before he said, “Mark? What are you doing?” 

The YRS owner was in his robe, a red silky number that barely made it to his knees, leaving his skinny, hairy legs almost completely exposed. He had a pair of thick, black-rimmed glasses on as he looked his employee up and down. “I was just on my way to bed,” he said, his voice giving away nothing. “I see you just had yourself some fun.” An amused smile pressed his lips as he motioned up and down Chester’s naked front. 

“Yeah,” Chester said with a nod. “Well, goodnight. I’m going to the bathroom and then we’re crashing too.” He saw the look of acknowledgement from his boss, and then he spun around and headed for the closest bathroom. He didn’t want to think about Mark. He just wanted to go pee and get cleaned up and snuggle back in bed with his boyfriend.

Mark watched as Chester hurried down the hall, his eyes following the twenty-year-old’s ass until he was out of sight. He smiled to himself before he turned toward the bedroom door and his eyebrow raised. Chester hadn’t shut it all the way. He stepped up close, his hand on the doorknob as he leaned in and listened. He waited, his eyes shut as he tried to pick up on anything, but it was silent. The brief thought that maybe Mike Shinoda was already asleep crossed his mind, and he pushed the door the rest of the way open. 

He peered into the darkened room, the only light coming from the bedside lamp. His eyes went straight to the bed, where the naked form of his newest house guest was laying. Mark smiled as he looked at him from the doorway. He could see his profile, and his chest and stomach slowly rising and falling. He tried his best to catch a glimpse of Mike’s private area, but from where he was there were too many shadows. He pursed his lips in thought before he stepped completely into the room, and then another step, which was just enough to catch Mike’s attention. 

“What are you doing in here?” Mike asked as soon as he figured out the person coming into the room wasn’t Chester. He sat up, scrambling for the blankets to cover himself. _Where the fuck is Chester?_ Mike felt his pulse racing again. Just when he’d been so relaxed and ready for sleep, now he felt trapped. His hands were in fists in the blankets as he kept them over the bottom half of his body.

“I didn’t mean to startle you,” Mark said as he moved closer to the bed, his hands out in front of him. “I saw Chester in the hallway and he said you were about to go to bed. I just came in to say goodnight.” His eyes drifted from Mike’s face, down to his naked torso. 

Mike tried to keep the tremble from showing in his hands as he scooted backwards into the bed, away from Mark’s advance. “Yes.” He tried to sound assertive. “We’re going to bed.” He waited, and when Mark didn’t turn away, Mike tried to guess what he wanted to hear. “I think we’re both pretty tired, it’s been a long day. Thanks for letting us stay.” He shifted his eyes back to the door, hoping that Chester would walk through. “Goodnight, sir.”

Mark smiled, his eyes shining with pleasure. “You’re welcome,” he offered, his voice smooth. “And I could tell Chester was tired. Looks like you wore him completely out, which isn’t an easy task. I’ll give you kudos for that. Have a good night,” he offered, before he tilted his head and turned away. He was out the door, and back out into the hallway, hearing nothing more from his house guest. 

Mike sat, stunned, trying to work out the last few minutes in his head. Nothing Mark had done - other than walking in on him naked - was particularly _wrong_ , but Mike couldn’t shake the sick feeling in his stomach. _Who does he think he is that he can just walk into people’s bedrooms whenever he wants? I don’t care if he owns the place, that’s not right!_ He held the blankets closer to his chest, trying to keep them out of the mess on his stomach but keep himself covered at the same time.

Chester was headed back to the bedroom, his eyes half shut, his pace slow. He yawned as he went, a roll of paper towels under his arm. He wanted to get back to Mike and pass out. The hallway was empty, quiet, as he got to the door and pushed it open. He was expecting to see his boyfriend still flat as a pancake on the bed, resting in ecstasy, but instead all he got was a worried Mike. Chester flipped the light on, flooding the room. “What happened?” he asked, already making his way to the bed. 

“Mark. He came in here after you left,” Mike said flatly, still clutching the blankets. “Walked right in here while I was just lying on the bed.” He tried not to sound angry, but he was. “You said nobody would come in here, Chester! What if he’d walked in here five minutes earlier?”

Chester felt his face pale as he looked from the bed to the door and back again. “I, I don’t know,” he answered before he handed Mike the roll of paper towels so he could wipe his stomach off. “He wouldn’t have. I didn’t close the door all the way when I went to the bathroom. That’s probably...what did he say?” 

“Goodnight,” Mike answered tightly. He ripped a wad of paper towels off the roll with more force than necessary and took care of his mess before he sighed and looked up at Chester. “And something about you looking worn out. It was so fuckin’ creepy. He’s creepy, Ches. I don’t like him.” He looked around for a trash can as he tossed the roll of paper towels back to his boyfriend. 

“Oh, well...I’m sorry, Mike,” Chester apologized as he stood by the bed. His shoulders slumped. He was pretty sure Mike was going to stay upset no matter what he said. “He just wanted to say goodnight. And I saw him in the hall. I told him we were about to go to bed. I’m sure he didn’t mean anything by it.” He paused for a moment, looking away from the glare in Mike’s dark eyes before add, “I’m sorry. We’re all pretty relaxed around here, he probably just wasn’t thinking you’d mind.”

Mike stood up from the bed, shaking his head as he tossed the paper towels in the small trash can by the dresser. “I do mind. I’m not one of his puppets. There’s boundaries, he should respect that.” He snatched a pair of underwear from the floor, then the other pair. “I don’t even know which of these I was wearing,” he said to Chester, his anger dissolving just a little. “This is ridiculous. I don’t want him to ruin the entire night.” He sighed, holding both pairs of underwear out for Chester. “Which ones do you want, I know matching matters to you.”

Chester reached for the pair that had the faint blue lines running around the edges, which matched the blue lines of his pajama bottoms and the lines in his socks. “I had these on,” he mumbled. He watched as Mike pulled on the other pair before he walked over and turned the light off, leaving them in the darker space. “Let’s just go to bed,” Chester suggested with a yawn. “I’m ready to pass out and I don’t want to think about Mark and his weirdness. I’m not even on the clock.” He shuffled back to the bed, dropping his underwear on the nightstand. He was good in just his pajama bottoms for the night. 

Mike watched Chester as he pulled on his underwear and the t-shirt he’d been wearing. He didn’t want to fight, and Chester had closed the subject for the night. The slump in his boyfriend’s shoulders, the mere fact that his back was turned, pinched at his heart. _Everything went from so perfect to so screwed up in record time. I really wish we could go home. Being here feels like it’s poisoning us._

He climbed into bed, sliding over to reach out for Chester, who was still sitting on the edge of the bed. “Ches? You’re right, let’s talk about this tomorrow. I just want to back up to before, rewind fifteen minutes and fall asleep in your arms. Can we do that?” He knew he shouldn’t have gotten upset earlier, that Chester was sensitive about everything at YRS, but it was too late for that now. Now he had to sound contrite and convince his boyfriend to want to cuddle. Cuddling was always to best part of going to sleep.

Chester had his eyes closed, his mind tired. Not fighting - not discussing - sounded good. He stood up and pulled the blankets back. He laid down, his spent body heavy on the mattress as he rolled Mike’s way. “Come here,” he called, his arms open. 

With a sigh of relief, Mike scooted into his boyfriend’s arms, tangling their legs together as he burrowed his face in the warm spot between Chester’s neck and shoulder. “Love you,” he said, gently kissing the side of Chester’s neck, pushing any thoughts not about them out of his head. He was safe in Chester’s arms.

“Mhm,” Chester mumbled. His arm was around Mike’s familiar warm body. He could feel his boyfriend’s breath on his skin as he breathed in a steady, low rhythm. “Me too,” Chester managed to say, before his mind faded to black. Sleep was always quick and deep when he was wrapped around his lover.

****  
TBC


	20. A New Contract

The sun was just coming in the bedroom window as Mark sat at the two person table. His thick black framed glasses were perched on the end of his nose as he sipped his morning cup of coffee, his eyes staring down at the contract he’d been going over for the last twenty minutes. He usually didn’t like to deal with business stuff this early, but after the events of yesterday and Chester bringing _the love of his life_ to YRS, Mark was pretty sure there were going to be problems moving forward with one of their most beloved stars. 

He took another short sip of his dark roast treat before he set it down and looked over toward the king sized canopy bed. Jason was still asleep. He was on his stomach, the cream colored sheets and blankets only barely covering his naked bottom. His dark, disheveled hair swept across his face as he snored quietly.

Mark stared for a moment, drinking in the covered shape of his husband’s perfect apple bottom and the way his arm was shoved up under the white pillow that his head was peacefully resting on. Mark smiled before he pulled his glasses off, rubbed his eyes and said, “Jason,” in his normal tone of voice. He quickly cleaned his glasses on the hem of his red silk robe, which didn’t do a lot of good but it was habit. He plopped them back on his face before he hollered, “Jason! It’s time to get up!” 

With a start, Jason lifted his head from the pillow, his eyes only cracking open a little bit as he squinted sleepily. “What? Why are you yelling?” Waking up and hearing Mark gripe at him was just another in a long list of reasons why he was starting to really resent his husband. In the early days of their marriage things were simpler, and Mark would lovingly wake him with soft kisses and caresses, coffee waiting, and gentle words. Now it was quick and harsh if Jason slept past their alarm. Too much of their lives had become consumed in the business, and it all became less fulfilling by the day. 

“I’m not yelling,” Mark denied. “I just need you to get up, throw something on and come over here. We have something we need to discuss.” He pointed down to the pale file folder on the table and the contract he’d been studying. 

It wasn’t worth it to even try to argue. Jason sat up in the bed, rubbing his eyes as he tried to get his mind to focus. He heard Mark sigh, so he swung his legs over the side of the bed and stood up, taking an extra moment to stretch his arms over his head and yawn deeply. There was a time that the sight of his naked body in the morning would have had Mark dropping the papers and paying attention to him, but this morning, the only look his husband had for him was one of impatience. He walked over to their dresser and pulled out a pair of boxers and the first pair of pajama pants he came across, and threw them on before he went and sat in his place at the table, shirtless. At least there was a second cup of coffee waiting for him. He picked up the cup and took a sip. It was still mostly hot. “What are you looking at?” 

Mark looked at Jason over the top of his glasses before he poked his finger on the stack of papers. “It’s Chester’s contract.”

“What about it? He’s got, like, a few more years left, right? He trying to get out of it or something?” Jason set the cup down and tried to get a read on Mark’s irritation. It didn’t seem to all be about him sleeping in this morning, which actually made him feel a little bit better.

“Not yet. But he’s going to. I can feel it.” Mark sat forward, his arms crossing on the table. “He’s been acting off these past few months and after meeting Mike yesterday, I know why. I’m telling you, Jason, I give it three months or less and Mike will be demanding that Chester quit. If he hasn’t already tried something along those lines all ready,” he grumbled. “I’m going through the contract to make sure we have enough leverage against him.” 

Jason scratched down the side of his face, then over the top of his head. “Yeah, Mike doesn’t seem to approve of what we have going on here. I have no idea why you let Chester bring him here in the first place.” 

Mark let out an irritated sigh. “He begged me. Usually I’d say no, but, he told me in Hawaii that he’s in love with Mike. I actually thought that maybe if Mike saw everything he’d go one of two ways, he’d either chill and Chester could go back to normal or he’d be repulsed and they’d break up.” He shook his head, his gray eyes dropping to the legal document he’d been combing through. “But now I’m pretty sure he’s going to try and take Chester instead. And I’ll be damned if I let that little goody two-shoes take away such a valuable asset from me. _Us_ ,” he amended quickly before he picked his coffee cup back up. 

“Hawaii?” Jason tried to think over their Hawaii trip, and when Mark would have had the opportunity to have a conversation with Chester long enough that Mike would have come up. It dawned on him that he’d probably been otherwise occupied at the time, and his cheeks flushed a bit as he hastily tried to recover. “In love? That explains Chester being so indifferent to things lately. He’s been harder to shoot, and requiring too many retakes. But I can’t see any reason why you’d be worried about Chester just leaving. You know his situation. He can’t just go, there’s too much at stake for him. He’d never be able to crawl out of that debt or to ever repay you if you haul his ass to court for breach of contract or for back rent on the loft.” He stopped, rolling his head in a circle to loosen up his muscles that were already clenched from the conversation. “You didn’t find any loopholes, did you?” 

Mark’s eyes narrowed as he seethed a deep, “No.” He looked away from his husband and out the window at the trees in the distance, the sun kissing them. “Of course there’s no loopholes. What do you think I pay our lawyers so much for?” he asked, his tone hitting a snide note before he went on. “But love makes people do idiotic things. We’re going to have to play a move ahead of this contract, which got me thinking.” 

He closed Chester’s file and set it to the side. “What if we got Mike to join YRS?” Before Jason could say anything, Mark rushed ahead of him. “Think about it, he’s half Asian so right there we bring in a whole new demographic to our roster. And if he’s with Chester, then we can also hit the _mixed_ fetish lovers out there. Think of the numbers.” 

Jason could feel his mouth hanging open as he listened to Mark’s improbable solution to what he saw as only a theoretical problem. The chances of getting someone like Mike to join their world were so slim it was laughable. “Are you serious right now?” he asked, gathering his thoughts enough to produce actual words. “There’s no way that kid is going to go for that. Did you see him yesterday? Not only did he look completely disapproving of everything at dinner, he also managed to defy you - even if he looked completely terrified while he was doing it! Nobody else has the balls to try that, and you think that even if you could somehow get him to say yes, you think you’d be able to control him?” Jason shook his head and laughed. The entire proposition was absurd. 

Mark grit his teeth before he took a deep breath. Ripping Jason a new one right now for being a snotty brat wasn’t going to help him with his plan. “Yes, he was a little guarded at dinner,” he agreed. “But he’s untrained. Most of our boys come in here younger than Mike. . .maybe not much younger, but younger. And a lot of them are desperate for the money. Obviously we’re going to have to play a different angle this time.” He rubbed his chin, his fingers scratching over the short salt and pepper hairs that were there. “I can get Chester to do anything I want,” he stated emphatically. “And I think I can get Mike to that point too. It’s just going to take time. We need to figure out what his trigger is. What can we offer him to make him _want_ to sign on?”

Despite his misgivings about the whole idea, Jason couldn’t help but cast around for ideas. He really hadn’t been able to talk to Mike much the day before, and when he’d tried in the hot tub, Mike hadn’t been forthcoming. “I don’t know, Mark. I think he’s probably pretty headstrong, despite his inexperience. Maybe because of that inexperience. And Chester, he’s just easily led. You saw how Mike was at dinner with the wine… he was the same way telling Chester exactly how to dry off when they left the hot tub. I can’t see Mike being trained the way our boys are. I don’t know how you’d ever get him to sign on.” Jason stood up from the table and took a step toward the bathroom before Mark ordered him to sit back down.

“I think you’re on to something,” Mark offered as he watched his husband follow orders. “Mike seems very possessive of Chester. Even here, which is ridiculous. But, what if that’s his trigger?” He narrowed his eyes in thought. “What if we told him if he signs on, he’d only have to partner with Chester?” He stopped, sitting up in his chair a little straighter, his finger raising, “even better, what if we told him that he and Chester were going to be exclusive partners? Oh, he’d jump at that. He’d get Chester all to himself.” He cocked his head, waiting to get a response to his brilliant idea. 

“Exclusive? You’re willing to give up the cash cow that is Ryan and Chester?” Jason managed to keep the hitch from his voice when he said Ryan’s name, but his heart was beating faster now. “You must be really desperate, Mark. You’ve been beating that partnership into the ground.” 

Mark shook his head. “Exactly. We’ve gotten just about as much out of those two together as we can. And we can just partner Ryan with Amir. But!” he said, something devious sparkling in his eyes, “if we sell Mike and Chester as exclusive partners, not only are they a mixed couple, but we can make them do everything bareback. Yeah, I like that,” he agreed with himself. “They can be our exclusive bareback couple.” A wide smile spread across Mark’s features as he pressed both his palms on the edge of the table and leaned forward. “Think of the promotion! So many avenues and fetishes we could tap with simply bringing Mike in as an exclusive with Chester.” 

The moment Mark had zeroed in on exactly how much money he stood to make by getting Mike on board, Jason knew the conversation was over. His husband’s mind had been made up, and nothing he said would make any difference. He dropped his head and stared at his hands. At least Ryan wouldn’t be working as much now that Mark had moved on to something he thought would be more profitable. Despite how self-serving that realization was, Jason couldn’t help but find some comfort in the idea that Ryan would have a little more free time. 

He twisted his wedding band on his finger as he stared at it. It felt like a ten pound weight on his finger. He hated to trap another person in this house the way he was, the way Ryan was, the way all of the boys were. Mark was right when he said his lawyers were the best.

“Well, it sounds like your mind is made up,” he said, raising his eyes to look at Mark, who was practically beaming with excitement. “But I think you’re forgetting something kinda important.” Jason’s voice was dripping with bitterness. “You’re offering exclusivity. That makes Chester off limits to you, too.” 

Mark paused as Jason’s words tumbled through his mind. He sat back in his chair, his bright idea suddenly becoming a bit dim. _Dammit. He’s probably right._ He stroked his fingers over his chin as he thought, as he weighed out his options. Bringing Mike on board could potentially make them a hell of a lot of money, but he’d have to give up one of his favorite boy toys to do it. “I suppose that’s true,” he offered as he glanced Jason’s way. “But maybe it’s for the better. Chester’s been rather unwilling since he’s been dating this guy. He’s been more work than he’s worth. Fine,” he decided as he convinced himself. “He’ll be off limits to everyone. Even me.” 

It stunned Jason how fast his husband switched gears on the idea of leaving Chester alone. He narrowed his eyes and looked at Mark as he remarked drily, “really. You know, you really shouldn’t mess around with any of the boys.” He watched Mark shrug off his comment carelessly, and Jason knew he should just let it go. But he also knew Mark had an unhealthy attachment to Chester, and he would do what he wanted to do when he wanted to do it, regardless of promising that Chester would be off limits. 

He looked down at the folder that held Chester’s contract and closed his eyes for a moment. So much of what they did these days he didn’t agree with, but it wouldn’t be smart to defy Mark, not when he was trying to cover up his own transgressions. “At any rate, good luck getting Mike to say yes. The boy looks like he despises you.” The disdain in his own voice was audible, despite his attempt to keep his tone level, and he flinched, waiting to see what Mark would have to say about his comment. 

Mark nodded slowly. “You’re right. I’m not sure he’d accept it from me. But you,” he said, his eyes lighting up a little in thought, “I bet he’d say yes if you ask him. You’re younger and you both have that Japanese lineage. I like it,” he decided quickly before Jason could agree or protest. “I’ll get a contract together.” He glanced at his watch. It was getting late. “Hopefully we can get him to sign it before they leave. I know he was adamant about heading out early this morning, but I saw them both late last night. They looked pretty wiped. Especially Chester. They’ll be sleeping in.” 

There was no way out, and Jason knew it. Once Mark made up his mind, that was how things were going to be. He’d lost any voice he had in their partnership long ago. 

“I’m going to get dressed,” he said, standing up again. This time, Mark didn’t stop him. He was already shuffling through papers and setting up a new folder with Mike’s name on it. The thought of how cocky Mark was, and how that used to appeal to him, crossed his mind before he turned away, heading into the bathroom to his closet to get dressed, to get ready to suck another person into their screwed up existence. 

****

Twenty minutes later, Jason sat at the bar, thinking about Mark’s instructions, hoping that maybe there wouldn’t be an opportunity to speak to Mike alone. Maybe Chester would be with him the entire time, and he could avoid trying to get Mike to become part of the family. He was so green, Jason could tell from the way his cheeks flushed with embarrassment at things the other boys didn’t even notice anymore. The longer he’d been with Mark, the more he hated finding new talent. Especially in this type of situation. He knew Chester would immediately put an end to having Mike sign a contract.

He glanced down uneasily at the stack of photocopies Mark had shoved in his hands before he walked out. It was Chester’s contract, ready to use as leverage if he needed it, and a fresh contract, ready for Mike to sign. The whole affair was different than how they usually got new boys, and Jason really didn’t know if he’d be able to convince someone like Mike to start doing porn. Usually the boys came looking for him, not the other way around. He didn’t understand why Mark wanted Mike so much. His explanation about Chester wanting to leave seemed vague at best, a worry over something that hadn’t even happened yet. It didn’t make a whole lot of sense, other than the fact that now Mark was seeing dollar signs. 

Just as he was about to find something for a quick pre-breakfast snack, Mike padded softly into the kitchen, his bare feet hardly making a sound on the tile floor. It was early, and Brad hadn’t even started breakfast yet. Jason looked up, his heart sinking as he saw that Mike was alone. They were alone in the kitchen, and he was going to have to do this after all.

Before he could say anything, Mike caught his eyes and said softly, “um, I just wanted a glass of water?” 

Jason watched as Mike stood nervously in the space between the kitchen and dining area, one hand twisted in the hem of his black t-shirt, causing it to pull up on the side enough to show a strip of tanned skin above the waistband of a pair of Chester’s pajama pants. He was biting his lip and Jason could see the blush creeping up his cheeks already. _Fuck, this kid can’t even talk to me. How are we supposed to get him in front of a camera?_

“I can get you a glass,” Jason offered, sliding off the barstool and heading for a cabinet. “You sure you want water? There’s juice, too,” he said, pointing at the pitcher on the bar. “Well, mimosas, not juice. Made them myself.” He flashed a smile at Mike, noticing how his eyes zeroed in on the drinks for a moment before he looked back at Jason.

“Just water,” Mike said again. _I can’t seem to get away from the alcohol in this place. I don’t think I need to be drinking at seven am._ He watched Jason fill a glass with ice and water, then slide it across the bar. “Thanks,” he mumbled, taking the glass and turning to go back upstairs.

“Mike! Mike, wait, why don’t you sit down for a minute? I didn’t really get to talk to you much last night.” Jason motioned to a barstool, and sat back down. “Why don’t you let Chester get a little more rest, and we can talk about some stuff.”

“Stuff?” Mike repeated warily. He stood there for a couple of seconds, torn between going back upstairs and letting Chester sleep a little longer. He knew his boyfriend was tired, and despite the awkward encounter in the hot tub last night, Chester had insisted that Jason was nice enough. _Maybe it will help smooth things over from last night, mean something to Ches if I try to get along. If I try to at least be polite._ “Okay, I guess... for a minute.”

Jason nodded encouragingly, patting the barstool again, and smiled when Mike sat down. “When you guys left last night, Chester had just told me how you met. Such a sweet story. How long have you guys been dating?” he asked, hoping he was right that talking about Chester would give Mike something comfortable to talk about, something to ease him into the other inevitable conversation. 

Before he answered, Mike took a long drink, relishing the feel of the cold water sliding down his throat. “A couple of months,” he said before taking another, smaller sip. 

“Seems like you guys are really close,” Jason went on, keeping an easy smile and friendly expression on his face. “You guys were really cute together last night.” Mike’s face brightened a moment when Jason complimented the couple, but faded as quickly as it had come. “What’s wrong, Mike?” he asked, his brows dropping into a false look of concern, his voice syrupy and low. He hated every second of this conversation and how fake it was.

“I… um…” Mike looked around the kitchen, not really sure what to say. Everyone except Mark seemed nice enough, but the whole concept of his boyfriend working here, having meaningless sex on camera, was something he was still trying to wrap his head around. And Mark had just given him bad vibes all the way around. “Well… I guess I’m just not really sure about all of this.” He waved his hand around, indicating the entire building. “It was a surprise to find out what Chester did for a living, back when he told me… and being here, it’s nothing like I thought it would be.” He stopped and worried his bottom lip with his teeth again before he sighed and went on. “Even though it’s exactly like Chester said, I still hate it as much as I did when I first found out.” 

Jason’s concerned face melted into sympathy, and he reached his hand out to pat Mike’s knee gently. “That must have been really hard for you, having something as big as this dropped on you from out of nowhere,” he said, his voice soft and caring.

Mike nodded, his eyes on Jason’s hand. It felt weird for this man to be touching him. It wasn’t comforting, not the way he supposed Jason intended it.

Jason read Mike’s body language loud and clear, squeezing his knee quickly before withdrawing his hand. “I’m sure you’re wondering how you fit into all of this, Chester’s life here.” 

Mike’s eyes snapped up and he looked at Jason curiously. _How does he know that’s what I’m thinking? That’s almost exactly what I said to Chester last night. That’s so strange._

Picking up his tumbler, Jason took a drink of his mimosa and leaned back in his barstool, wondering if he should keep talking. When Mike didn’t say anything, he cleared his throat and cut to the chase. “Has he told you he loves you?” He knew he’d figured out the right tactic when Mike’s eyes widened, his dark irises suddenly bottomless.

“What?” Mike said, his voice barely above a whisper. “Why? Why would you need to know that?” His hand was shaking now, and he sat the glass down to try to hide it.

“Well, if he loves you, that certainly would separate you out from the… work… that he does here. And it would all just be easier for you to handle, right? I mean, what we do here, this isn’t about love.” Jason waited just a moment, then finished, “but I’m sure he told you that. What’s the saying? Sex, not love?”

Mike felt his stomach take a sickening turn as Jason repeated the words Chester had told him the night they’d first had sex, the night Mike gave himself wholly and completely over to his boyfriend, trusting every word he’d said about how he could compartmentalize work, how work didn’t mean anything. He’d told Mike, right before they made love, that what they had was different. “I don’t think what we talk about is any of your business,” he managed, unable to look away from Jason’s sympathetic eyes.

“Do you believe him?” Jason prodded. He knew he had Mike right where he needed him now. “Can _you_ separate sex from love?”

_It’s not about me. I’m not the one working here. Chester said. He said this didn’t mean anything, he said we were different._ “It doesn’t matter what I can or can’t do. Chester says it’s not the same thing for him. I believe him,” Mike said, his voice trembling. _I do believe him. I have to believe him if this is going to work. And I love him. So much._

WIth a glint in his eye, Jason leaned close, putting his lips right next to Mike’s ear. “What if you could let him have both? Sex _and_ love? What if you could make it easier on both of you? You love him? Become his partner. And I don’t mean just out in the real world. I mean here, with us. You could give Chester everything.” He waited for just a moment, letting his breaths linger over Mike’s earlobe, letting his whispers sink in, before he pulled back and caught Mike’s eyes.

It was hard not to laugh at how wide Mike’s eyes had become, and Jason had to remind himself there would be hell to pay later if he couldn’t pull this off. Schooling his face into seriousness, he waited, watching the conflicting emotions as they cascaded across Mike’s face. 

“Me? Here?” Mike’s eyes darted around the kitchen and he stood up, pushing the barstool back. “No. No! I couldn’t… I could never… no,” he said again, firmly the last time. “This is Chester’s business, not mine.”

Quickly, Jason stood up, reaching his hand out to grab Mike’s wrist. “Listen to me, Mike,” he ordered, his voice calm and controlled. “It’s obvious to me that you think this is all wrong.” He flipped his hand out, pointing upstairs. “But your boyfriend, he signed a contract. I’ve got it right here, was just thinking about it, in fact. I’m offering you a chance to let him finish out the terms of his contract and still be faithful to you. Isn’t that what you want? Because he can’t break this contract to be with you. The price is too high.” Jason pulled on Mike’s wrist, bringing their bodies closer together. “Is this what you want? Do you want to know that Chester leaves you every day to come here to have sex with people you don’t even know? How does it feel to have someone else’s body so close to you, to know he’s _even closer_ to people every day?”

Mike was breathing heavy, fear creeping over him as Jason held him tightly, nudging his knee between Mike’s legs and pressing in even closer as he sneered, “can you sit behind your little piano and teach your students, and think about Chester, here, without you, naked with someone else? I’m telling you right now, Mike, it will eat you up inside.”

Before Mike could think to ask how Jason knew about his job, his beloved students, he released Mike’s wrist and stepped back, a smile on his face. “But you can be in control of it all. You can be the only person Chester is with. It’s all up to you. Oh, and of course,” Jason looked toward the upper level of the big house again, “Chester. I mean, you probably want to make sure he’s okay with all this too, right?” He chuckled for a moment. “But why would he say no? If he loves you, there’s no reason he’d give up the opportunity to have you as his partner. Sure would make things easier for him.” Jason sat back down on the bar stool, leaving Mike frozen next to the bar.

Jason waited, watching as Mike tried to work out his options in his head. It was painful to see the struggle on the younger man’s face. He almost wanted to back down, let him say no, but the thought of Ryan’s time being freer, and Mark’s wrath if he didn’t pull this off, pushed him to keep filling Mike’s head with ideas. “You know, Mark and I were talking about how nice it would be to have a couple like you and Chester, two people in an actual relationship… that are in love with each other… it changes the dynamics of what we’re doing a little bit. Mark is very, very on board with the two of you being exclusive, to the point that he’s even willing to keep Chester off limits.”

Mike was teetering on the edge of saying yes, still needing to be convinced, and Jason pulled out the last card he could think of - Mark. “Last night I could tell, Mike, just from your body language that you don’t care for Mark. Did you even know that he thinks he can have sex with any of these boys any time he wants? Do you know what kind of disgusting person he is?” He stopped and let that sink in for a moment, and he knew from Mike’s expression that he had no idea that Mark used his employees whenever the mood hit him. Jason didn’t know if he’d have the stomach to tell him that Mark required Chester’s services more than any of the other boys. 

But he plunged ahead, spitting out the ugly words. “He expects the boys to just go along with it. And they do, because Mark is very convincing, and very capable of getting what he wants. _On and off camera._ ” 

Mike’s eyes snapped up. “What? What do you mean… off camera.”

“Come on, Mike.” Jason rolled his eyes at Mike naivety. “It’s exactly what it sounds like. Mark likes to have his fun with the boys. Sex. And he _really_ enjoys Chester’s company.”

Mike could feel the blood draining from his face, from his hands and arms, as his entire body went numb from the shock. _That’s not… that’s not work. That’s not having sex with someone else for the camera, that’s… that’s coercion. Chester, he’s mine. Mine. Mark can’t touch him, I don’t want him to touch him ever again!_ The panic was crawling over him, a suffocating feeling combined with a blinding fear for his boyfriend. “He can’t do that!” Mike blurted out, unable to control the fevered pitch of his exclamation.

“Keep your voice down,” Jason said through gritted teeth. “You’ll wake everyone up.” He glanced toward the living area. “He can, and he does. Nobody tells him no.” Despite his orders, and the fact that he was about to get Mike to agree to join YRS, Jason could hardly stomach the fear and repulsion in Mike’s eyes. A moment of compassion caused him to drop his voice to a whisper and lean back close to Mike’s ear. “Listen… I know you know about me and Ryan… even Ryan has to say yes, and… I’d give anything to make that stop. You say that you love Chester… don’t you want to protect him?” 

Jason pulled back and caught Mike’s panicked eyes. They stared at each other for a breathless second, a bond brought about by shared desperation beginning to form. “Think about what’s being given to you, Mike. If you do this, if you agree, and you and Chester get to be exclusive, it would solve all the problems for you both, wouldn’t it? There’s so many reasons to say yes to this, I can’t think of any reason to say no. If I were being offered a way to keep Ryan away from Mark, I’d take it in a heartbeat.” He swallowed hard and looked out into the living area again. “I can’t make you do it, but it’s a winning situation for everyone. You’ll have Chester all to yourself. And more importantly, you’ll be keeping Mark away from him.” Jason sat back, holding his breath as he waited to get a reaction. He’d tried every angle he could think of. He could only hope it would be enough. 

There were so many thoughts swirling through Mike’s head. Everything Jason said was a lot to take in, and as he tried to process through it all, he felt his face crumble in despair. _What if Chester says no? What if… what if he doesn’t want me here? What if Jason pitches this idea and he freaks out? What then? What would happen to us if he says no- would we be over? What if what happens with Mark doesn’t bother him? What if I give up everything to protect him and he doesn’t want to be protected?_ He could feel the beginnings of tears stinging in the corners of his eyes at the impossible situation he was suddenly in, and there was no way out that he could reason. Everything Jason was saying made sense in a weird, twisted way. He couldn’t get Chester out of the contract, but he could keep him away from the other guys. He could keep Mark away from him. Jason was offering him the opportunity to make that happen, to keep Chester his and only his. Forcing himself to hold it together, he finally said, “I… maybe I’ll talk to Chester about it,” dropping his head and staring at the floor.

Smoothly, Jason said, “oh, Mike, I can do it for you. I mean, you certainly wouldn’t be convincing with the state you’re in right now. Why don’t you go relax out on the patio? I’ll go make things right with Chester.” It had almost been too easy, and Jason felt like an asshole. He reached for the pitcher and poured a mimosa in a new tumbler, gently sliding it into Mike’s hand. _One more in the fold_ , he thought as Mike looked up at him gratefully.

Mike didn’t resist the drink, and he didn’t decline Jason’s offer. “Would you? I think… maybe you’d say it better than I can,” he said, biting down on his bottom lip. “I, I don’t want him to say no.”

“Oh, don’t worry, Mike,” Jason said reassuringly as he stood up to go upstairs and break the news to Chester, “there’s no way he’ll say no to me.”

****

It wasn’t even seven-thirty yet and Jason felt like he’d lived through an entire day. There were still at least two more conversations to be had this morning, and only one of those was going to be easy. He watched Mike make his way out to the patio before he poured another drink and headed up the stairs. Waking Chester up with the news his boyfriend wanted to get into the porn business would probably result in a confrontation that could wake the whole house if he wasn’t careful. He knew Mark would hate that.

The door to Chester’s room was cracked open, clearly indicating that Mike had expected to come right back from getting his water. With a deep breath, Jason pushed the door open and took a few steps inside.

Chester was curled around a pillow, his breathing calm as he slept facing the door. Jason paused and looked over his face, at the messy flat mohawk and then down at the tattooed arms holding the pillow to his chest. It was the combination of all those things, lip ring included, that made him so popular in their movies. He knew losing Chester would be a big hit to their profits. He wiped any second thoughts he had about his conversation with Mike out of his head and stepped right up to the side of the bed. “Hey, Chazzy, time to wake up. Brought you something.” 

Chester shifted in his sleep. He heard his name, and he twisted just enough to put his arm behind him, searching for Mike. But his hand landed on empty space, and his eyes popped open. The first thing he saw was Jason’s face, way too close. Chester gasped as he sat up, his eyes darting around the bed, and then around the room. “What. . .where’s Mike?” he asked, looking at his boss and the glass of what looked like orange juice in his hand. 

“Mike’s fine, he’s already downstairs. Waiting for breakfast. We had a nice chat this morning,” Jason said, holding out the glass. “I brought you a mimosa. Made them myself.” He winked, smiling as Chester reached for the glass.

“Mike wandered downstairs by himself?” Chester asked, doubtfully. The idea that Mike had left the bedroom without him at all was still an odd one as he took a sip from the glass, not even questioning alcohol so early. Jason was a fan of mimosas and he prided himself on making a good one. Chester let out a yawn as he situated himself a little bit better, dragging a pillow behind his back. “You guys really talked? And he was nice? I mean, not that he’d be mean,” Chester was quick to correct with a shake of his head, “but he’s not really into all this.” He dropped his eyes to his lap, and his plaid pajama bottoms where the blanket wasn’t covering. Yesterday had been rough. 

“Oh, we had a nice talk,” Jason assured him as he sat down on the end of the bed. “He was… fine, mostly. We did discuss your work here a little bit. You’re right about him not really being into what we do here, but I think I may have done you a favor.” He looked up to see Chester eyeing him with interest. “I might have gotten Mike to see things your way. You owe me, Chazzy.” 

Chester squint his eyes in thought as he tried to understand. “Owe you? And what do you mean you got him to see things my way?” He snorted a little, his eyes bouncing over to the open door. “Unless you have a magic wand and made it so Mike is suddenly pro-porn, I don’t see how he’s seeing anything my way. He’s not like me,” he mumbled, his voice dropping. “I can separate things. He can’t. I know it’s really hard for him to understand all this.” 

Jason nodded, watching Chester’s expressions carefully. He knew he had to tread lightly. “Yeah, I got that from our talk. He’s easier to read than I thought when it comes to you. I can tell he’s totally in love with you. And I can tell that he’s jealous, possessive even. He can’t stand to think of you with these other guys. Right? He didn’t say it, but I bet you guys have even argued about that, haven’t you?” 

Chester stared into his drink. “Yeah,” he whispered. “It’s been more than once. I keep trying to explain to him that it’s just work, and he can’t look at it that way. I know he gets a little jealous. Which is actually kind of nice.” He looked up to meet Jason’s eyes, a soft smile drifting across his lips for a moment. “To have someone jealous over me because they love me so much. I’ve never had that before.” 

“Love can make you do crazy things,” Jason said, re-wording what Mark had said earlier into something nicer, something that sounded a little more positive. “But jealousy, that can end up being a pretty big problem in a relationship. And Mark and I were thinking, we just want you to be happy here, you know? We love having you as part of the family. We can tell that jealousy has been putting a strain on you, you just haven’t been yourself the past few months.” He paused as Chester nodded, looking at him wide eyed. “We asked ourselves, what can we do to make that better for you? Better for Mike, even? Mike is part of the family by extension, because of you.” 

Jason smiled, hoping he’d gotten just the right amount of caring concern in his voice before he switched it over to excitement. “It was such a great conversation with him this morning, Chazzy. Mark just knows you’ll be excited to know we’ve offered Mike a chance to really be part of the family. To be your exclusive partner! Won’t that be great? It solves all of your problems here with Mike… and Mark. He was totally on board, just so you know. Both of them. Though that was two different conversations.” 

Chester choked on his drink. He went into a harsh coughing fit for a second, his eyes watering before he managed to say, “What? What do you mean?” He looked at Jason’s grin, and he felt something cold slink over his stomach. He narrowed his glare at his boss. “What did you do?” 

Jason smiled. “I told you, I fixed everything up nicely for you. Got Mike to see things our way. He practically jumped at the chance to be the only person you work with, and it makes perfect sense. What he really hates about what we do is the casual sex, but Mark’s taking that out of the equation for you. And when I reminded Mark that exclusivity meant that you were off limits to him, too, well… he seems to think that you and Mike together will bring him enough money that he’s willing to give you up.”

Chester’s lower jaw was shaking. “He, he said I wouldn’t have to, I mean, I don’t have to do what Mark wants anymore? Off camera?” 

Jason’s stomach twisted as he caught the glimmer of hope in Chester’s eyes. He wanted more than anything to be able to walk into Ryan’s room and tell him he’d managed to secure the same deal for him. It wouldn’t do any good to get caught up in that at the moment, he’d have to worry about how to get Ryan out later. Right now he was tasked with making this whole deal go down. “You wouldn’t have to go along with him anymore. You’d be off limits to everyone, including him. No more off camera sex.” 

Chester looked down. It wasn’t just his jaw, his whole body was trembling, trembling with joy. With relief. With the hope of freedom. “I almost can’t believe that,” he said, looking back up at Jason. “I’ve been trying not to, I mean, I haven’t wanted to since I’ve been with Mike, and now. . .” His happy thoughts stopped suddenly. It wasn’t a free offer. Getting out from under Mark meant Mike would have to join YRS. 

Chester’s stomach started to feel sick. What a cruel tradeoff. “Jay,” he said, looking his boss in the eyes, “did you, you didn’t tell Mike about Mark, did you? He doesn’t know.” He took a hard swallow as he looked toward the door. “He’d hate me if he found out. He’d say I was cheating, but I’m not. It’s not like that. You know it’s not like that.” His heart was beating fast as he shook his head and hoped that his secret shame at YRS was still just that. 

“I did, Chester, and I’m sorry. I just… you know how it is when Mark makes up his mind. He hatched this idea that you’d be happier with Mike here, and then it just took off, and when I was talking to Mike about signing on, I… well, it just came out.” Jason couldn’t admit how hard he’d had to sell the idea of coming to YRS to Mike. He really believed Mike would have said no without knowing what a sleaze Mark was, without Mike’s inherent possessiveness rising to the surface. “He wasn’t happy about it,” he said truthfully, “but he seemed to understand that it wasn’t exactly your choice, you know?”

Chester took a long drink from his glass before he shut his eyes. _Mike knows. He knows it’s been going on all this time. What’s he going to say? How’s he. . .how’s he going to look at me now? I’ve done nothing but defend this place. And now he knows._ Chester opened his eyes to see Jason waiting patiently. Or maybe not so patiently, Chester couldn’t tell. He couldn’t tell anything at the moment. “I know it’s not your fault,” he decided. “I know you get it from Mark just as bad as we do. I just didn’t want Mike to know.” 

With a raised eyebrow, Jason nodded. Apparently Ryan talked to Chester more than he realized. “I understand that, but let me tell you. If I had a way to get the same thing for Ryan, I’d do it. You know what a big deal this is, Chester, you can’t say no when Mark is offering you exclusivity. He’s so sure it will work out well that he’s willing to let you guys be together. And Mike could see the benefits of coming here and being with you.” He dropped his voice a little before he added, “it takes Mark completely out of the equation. That was _very_ appealing to your boyfriend. He really does love you a lot.” 

Chester nodded. “I love him, too.” He looked across the room as he tried to digest it all. Everything Jason was saying felt like it crashed onto Chester all at once. “And Mike said yes to this already? He wouldn’t do that. He’s way too level headed and he takes time to sort things out. And he wouldn’t do that without talking to me first.” The alcohol was starting to kick in, and Chester set his half empty glass down on the nightstand. It was already hard enough to sort this all out without being tipsy on top of it. Tipsy on an empty stomach didn’t go well together, Chester knew that from experience. He threw the blankets back and swung his legs off the side of the bed, ready to stand up. He wanted to go find Mike. He wanted to see if everything Jason was saying was true, and most of all, he needed to make sure that Mike didn’t hate him. 

“Stay there,” Jason ordered, “and finish that drink. We’re not done yet.” His tone left no room for argument. “Regardless of what you think Mike would typically do in a situation like this, I think he realized that nothing matters except what Mark wants. It doesn’t matter what you think about it, or what Mike thinks about it. You know you’ve got a contract and Mark isn’t going to let you walk away. You don’t have any options in this, and you know it, and Mike does too. Once Mark makes his mind up, that’s it. And I’ve already done the hard part, getting Mike to agree to do this. This only benefits you, Chester. And I admit, there’s a little something in it for me, too.” He cleared his throat, thinking about Ryan. “Mark’s been an intolerable asshole since you started drifting away from the work. Having Mike here will get you focused again, and it can only put Mark in a better mood. Hell, we all benefit from that. Don’t you see?”

Chester slowly reached over and took his drink. He wasn’t sure about any of this. He knew Mike. He knew him well, and the idea that Jason had managed to talk him into working at YRS was still unbelievable. _How could Mike agree to this? He’s always hated this place. Did he really say yes just to keep Mark away from me? All of them away from me. . ._ He took a sip, the splash of alcohol hitting his lips as he gave Jason a long stare. “Mike really said yes to this?” 

Jason nodded. “He really did. Of course, he was afraid of how you’d take the news, that’s why I’m here.” He pressed a hand to his chest, putting on his most compassionate face. “I told him I understood how he was feeling, and I knew how to talk to you about it, to get you to understand where he’s coming from. He can’t stand the thought of you having sex with anyone but him… he confessed to me how much that was killing him. Even to the point of wondering if you two would be able to make it together,” he lied smoothly. “Chester, he cried when he told me how much he loved you, and he wants to make this easier for you, and for him. He’s willing to do this to keep the two of you together. Isn’t that what you want?” 

“He. . . he cried?” Chester’s head dropped. He hated it when Mike cried. When Mike was upset at all. He could already see his lover’s big brown puppy eyes in his mind. He looked across the room. _He doesn’t think we’re strong enough to make it through the next two years. That’s why he signed. We’re not enough the way we are. But he didn’t even ask me._ Something bubbled in his stomach, the beginning of anger. He was bossed around enough by Jason and Mark, and now Mike was working with them to do it some more. Chester shut his eyes. The idea of only being with Mike was a nice one. More than that, it was a relief. But Chester knew it wouldn’t work. Mike wasn’t cut out for the business. Nothing about Mike Shinoda said porn. Nothing. _And what happens when he’s miserable here? And it will be because of me. He can’t do this._ “Where’s Mike now?” he asked, turning his focus back to his boss. 

The thin set of Chester’s lips wasn’t a good sign. Jason wasn’t working hard enough at this, and Chester was about to ruin it. Mike hadn’t actually signed the contract yet, and if he let Chester talk to him, it was all going to be finished before it started. “I told you he’s downstairs,” Jason said, standing up. “You’re not going down there, yet. Not until I know you understand what’s happening here, Chester. You aren’t getting a choice. This is how things are going to be. It’s a short term contract, Mark’s willing to have it end at the same time as yours. You need to listen to what he’s doing for you, and you damn well better thank him for it the next time you see him. This isn’t an offer he’s ever extended to anyone else, and frankly, he doesn’t have to do shit for you, Chester, he owns you. For the next two years, and you know it. Do you want two more years away from Mike on the weekends, and two more years of Mark hassling you for sex all the time?” 

He stood with his back as straight as he could make it, the friendliness gone from his eyes as he looked at his employee. It was Jason’s responsibility to make sure this all went off without a hitch, and he fixed his gaze on Chester, forcing him to keep eye contact. “Do you understand what’s happening here? You’re going to make sure Mike signs that contract.” 

The bubble of anger in Chester’s stomach was squashed. He felt the familiar feeling of helplessness float over him as Jason spoke. As Jason commanded. Chester’s shoulders slumped. He wanted Mike to be happy, but working at YRS wouldn’t do that for him. Whatever wasn’t working between him and Mike wasn’t going to be fixed by having cameras in front of them and Jason and Mark ordering them both around. _But I can’t leave either. If I don’t do this, Mark will keep after me, and Mike knows that now. He knows everything. What if he decides he doesn’t want to sign it? He’ll leave me. He won’t stay with me now, knowing how things are with Mark. And then Mark will blame me for it. He’ll do something to me. . .I’ve been living at the loft for free. He’s always threatened to take me to court for back rent if I go against him. Maybe he’d really do that. I wouldn’t be able to pay him back. And my mom. . .where would she be if I go to jail? Then I’d really never be able to fix things with Mike. He couldn’t be with someone who’s in jail._

Chester shut his eyes. His heart told him this was wrong. He didn’t want Mike to get involved in all of this. It would change him. He wouldn’t be the same person anymore, and Chester hated that thought. But there was no room for that here. Not with Jason giving an order straight from Mark. Not as Jason loomed over him, waiting for an answer. Chester nodded slowly as he opened his eyes. “Okay,” he agreed, “I’ll talk to him about it.” 

Jason stepped toward the door, giving Chester a brief smile. “I knew you’d see it our way. It’s really the best thing, you know that.” Ryan’s face flashed in his mind and he felt the pinch of jealousy on his heart as he thought about how lucky Mike was to be able to step in and take away the most intolerable part of the job for his boyfriend. No matter how many times he’d looked for ways, Jason had never been able to do the same for his. “Mike’s doing what he thinks is the best thing for both of you, and he’s doing it out of love. You have no idea how lucky you are to have that kind of burden lifted from your relationship. I know you don’t want Mike here, I totally get it. But the benefits will outweigh the rest,” he said before he disappeared into the hallway, leaving Chester alone with his thoughts. 

****  
TBC


	21. Bound By Love

Chester stood looking out over the pool area. His eyes had gone straight to his boyfriend, who was slouched on one of the deck chairs that had been left by the far end of the pool. Mike’s head was down, one hand lost in his blue hair, the other holding something that Chester couldn’t quite make out. _I don’t even know what to say to him. There’s no way he’d sign up to do this if it wasn’t for me and my problems. Now he’s going to be out there. People are going to see him, and I know he hates that._

He took a deep breath, his mind still fumbling between marching out there and telling Mike this whole thing is a bad idea and walking out calmly and championing the idea of Mike signing onto YRS as his exclusive partner. He lightly pushed the door open, immediately feeling the warm morning air as a sharp contrast to the cooler temperature that Mark kept the house at. 

_It would be nice for us to always be together, but that could be bad too. What if he gets tired of me? Couples who work together usually have a hard time. I see it with Jason and Mark sometimes, but then again. . .they’re both doing other people, so they don’t even count. No, it would be good to have him here, and everything with Mark would stop, and that would be amazing,_ he decided as he inched closer to the pool, his steps so slow he almost felt like he was standing still. _I’m not sure I believe it when Jason says we’ll be exclusive for the next two years. That’s a long time. What if they’re only saying that to get Mike in, then what? We’ll both be trapped._ Chester stopped for real, and his heart did too. _What if Mark tries to do something with Mike?_ He took a deep gulp of the morning air, hating the thought of something like that happening. Of Mike being pressured. . .forced to do things he didn’t want to do.

_No. No, it won’t go that way. Mike wouldn’t do it, even if Mark tried something. I can’t think like this. I can’t. I’m freaking myself out over something that hasn’t even happened yet._

A few steps later and he could see that Mike was nursing a glass of orange juice. _Just juice. He wouldn’t be drinking one of Jason’s mimosas. Not at this hour. Probably not at any hour._ He took a heavy breath as he stood just a few feet away. He studied the way Mike’s hand was lost in his hair, his fingers looking like they’d been half swallowed. His neck looked strained, his other hand clutching the tall glass like it was some sort of life raft. 

Chester could feel his heart pounding. He had no idea what he was going to say, or even if he could look his boyfriend in the eyes, as he cleared his throat and whispered, “Mike?” 

At the sound of Chester’s voice, Mike looked up, surprised to see his boyfriend just steps from him. He’d been so lost in thought that he hadn’t even heard him come outside. “Hey,” he said softly, his stomach lurching suddenly as he took in Chester’s face. _He looks upset. I did that, I upset him. And I don’t know what to say to explain myself. What a stupid decision to make, just to try to protect him. He has to understand my motivation. What’s happening with Mark has to end. But I should have talked to him first. I should have made sure everything Jason was saying is true. What if he was lying to me?_ A moment of relief coursed over his body, but it was quickly replaced by the growing fear that no matter what was true, Chester would be upset with him. Mike felt the warmth in his cheeks, unsure whether it was the alcohol or the anxiety over their impending conversation that was getting to him. “Did you sleep okay? I… I’m sorry about last night, about our argument. I didn’t sleep great and I got up to get some water, and Jason was awake, and we started talking, and -” he paused long enough to suck in a quick breath - “I think Jason probably talked to you, didn’t he? Ches, I don’t want you to be mad at me, I think, I think that I may have done something that you’re gonna hate! And I only did it because I’m worried about you, and about us!” Mike was already on the cusp of tears as he rambled out every thought in his head all at once. 

“Mad?” Chester repeated as he took the chance to look his lover in the eyes. “God, no, I’m not mad. Not at you.” He wrapped his arms around himself, rubbing his elbows. It wasn’t cold outside, but he didn’t feel warm. “If anything, I was worried you would be mad at me.” He looked away and out over the crisp blue water of the swimming pool. “I don’t really understand,” he stated before he looked back at his boyfriend. “Jason said a lot of things, but…” He stopped, his throat suddenly feeling dry. He knew joining YRS was the exact opposite of everything Mike Shinoda had ever stood for in the months that he’d known him, but he also knew he had to make this happen. He needed to encourage his boyfriend to follow through with it, or the universe would split open, and he’d have Mark coming down on him harder than he ever had before. 

“Mike,” Chester said, trying again as he rubbed the side of his head, and then up over his flat, unstyled mohawk. “I think, well, I’m not sure what I think,” he admitted. “I’m a little shocked, still. I don’t hate the idea of you being here, God, no,” he assured his boyfriend as he closed the gap between them, and with a slight hand gesture, he got Mike to scoot over. He sat down on the lounge chair next to him, their shoulders and legs touching. “I have to be honest. The idea of you being here with me is amazing, but I don’t want you to be miserable either.” He dropped his head. He needed Mike to say yes, but he’d never be able to live with himself if Mike did all of this for the wrong reasons. 

Leaning over, Mike set down the glass he’d been holding and then dropped his head into his hand, his elbow propped up on his knee. He reached for Chester’s leg and held on tightly to his thigh. “You know I hate the weekends, Ches, and being away from you. I hate you being here without me, and… everything that comes with that.” He stared at his hand on Chester’s leg. “Everything… especially Mark. Jason told me how... things go around here with Mark, and I… I mean, is that true? Does he force you, Chester?”

Chester shut his eyes. Hearing it out loud was worse than he ever thought it would be. He scooted away from Mike, pulling both his legs up on the chair, and hiding his face between his knees. “I’m sorry,” he said, his heart heavy with a cocktail of shame and guilt. “I didn’t want you to know. I don’t like doing it. I’ve told him no, and he makes it like I have to.” Chester’s hands went over his head, his fingers digging into his hair. 

They both sat for a moment, staring at the ground silently. _He pulled away from me. But it’s not his fault, it’s this place. It’s Mark. It’s not his fault._ Mike didn’t like the space between them. He slid right back over to Chester, and he wrapped one arm around his back and pulled his body close, even though Chester didn’t move. He didn’t lift his head, he didn’t say anything, and Mike’s heart ached. _It’s true, and it’s awful. And the only thing I can do is be here. The only way I can help him is to be here. I have to be here._

“Ches,” he whispered, brushing his lips over the back of Chester’s neck, “I’m not mad at you. You didn’t do anything wrong. I, I thought you’d be mad at me, for agreeing to all this, but when Jason told me we’d be exclusive, that Mark would leave you alone… I wanted that for you. I wanted that for us, I don’t want you to have to keep anything from me. This isn’t your fault,” he stated firmly. “I hate everything about this place, but I love you. You are not defined by this place.” He leaned his head against Chester’s and felt the tears he’d been holding back drip down his face. None of this was fair to them. “I don’t want you to be angry with me, but I said yes because I want to be the only person in your life. I don’t want you having sex with anyone else. It kills me inside.” 

Chester lifted his head, his eyes not missing the tears rolling down his lover’s face. “Don’t cry,” he whispered immediately as everything else drifted away for a moment. He laced his arm around Mike’s waist, his lips meeting the salty taste of his boyfriend’s cheek. “I love you too,” he assured him. “I just want it to be you, too. . .I just never really thought that was possible, but maybe this is the way to do that. I won’t have to break my contract and Mark will. . .” He stopped for a moment, the faces of his friends flashing through his mind. Would they get it that much more from Mark if he wasn’t in the rotation? Chester dropped his feet back to the ground as he took a deep breath. That was an endless road of thought, and he knew it would lead him to nothing but guilt. He leaned forward a little, trying to see Mike’s red teary eyes. _I love him, and he’s more important right now._ “If you do this,” he started slowly, “it will be in front of cameras, Mike. People will be watching. Not just when we film, but for forever. Do you think you’ll be okay with that? I got used to it, but I’m not you.” He pulled Mike a little closer, nuzzling his nose to his neck as he waited, as he relished in his warmth and closeness. In his dedication to their relationship, despite all the demons of YRS.

“I don’t know,” Mike answered simply, closing his eyes. “I don’t know how I feel about that part of it. I wish it was all easier. I wish there was a different solution, that I wasn’t so jealous of the people and your time here. Throw the stuff with Mark in the mix, and this feels like an opportunity to make all of that go away. And when it comes down to it, I know it’s in front of cameras, but I’ll be with you. _You._ If there’s anything I’m sure of, it’s that. Even if there’s other people watching… it’s just you and me when we’re together, I won’t even be thinking about that.” _I hope. I hope that I can just ignore everything else around me and just focus on Chester. Then it will be okay. And it’s not forever. Just for a little while. Filming can’t be that bad or he’d have never started this in the first place._

Chester let out a long breath, his gaze going out over the water in front of them. “I do that,” he said, his fingers rubbing Mike’s side. “I close my eyes and I think of you while it’s going on. I do that a lot. I didn’t want to fall in love,” he admitted a little softer. “I didn’t want to drag anyone into this, because I knew it would be hard on them. The jealousy, like you said. But you kind of came out of nowhere. I’m sorry, Mike. I’m sorry I can’t get out of this. And the stuff with Mark, I’ll be okay. If you don’t want to do this, I’ll be okay.” He shut his eyes, hiding from the world for a minute as he listened to the morning breeze rustle through the nearby trees, and his own steady breathing as he tried to keep it under control. He was pretty sure he wasn’t doing what Jason ordered him to do. He was supposed to convince Mike to join YRS, no questions. But instead, all Chester could think about was how much his boyfriend would hate it if he became one more of Mark’s porn boys. 

Mike took a deep breath in as he followed where Chester’s gaze had been, the water in front of them, thinking about what he’d just said. They were both apologizing for a situation neither of them had any control over. Chester was bound by contract, and Mike was bound to Chester by love. He wished he could change the trajectory of where they were headed, but it just wasn’t going to happen, not now. If Chester couldn’t leave, Mike was going to make damn sure that nobody else in YRS came near him. “Ches, don’t be sorry anymore. Let’s just change what we can about the situation we’re in. Let me be here with you, and we’ll make it okay.” He turned to kiss the side of Chester’s face. “We’ll be okay, we’ll be in this together now.”

Chester breathed in the closeness of his boyfriend before he twisted his neck, maneuvering himself to the perfect angle to turn Mike’s peck to his cheek into a real kiss. He joined their lips, letting the intimacy of their words and sacrifices pour out. He slid his hand from Mike’s side up his back, and to his neck, his fingers touseling the very bottom of his boyfriend’s hairline. The touch and familiarity of everything Mike Shinoda, was a safe space and Chester felt a form of peace settle over him. This was it. Mike was going to be here from now on. He’d never have to be with any other partners, and most of all, there would be no more late night visits from Mark. No more being dragged into a spare room the moment the mood hit his boss. It was just going to be him and Mike. It was what Jason had ordered him to do, but as their kiss went deeper, Chester decided it was what he wanted, too. 

The anxiety in Mike’s stomach began to melt away as they kissed. He loved the feel of Chester’s hands on his neck, teasing his hair and the tender place behind his ear, and despite the high emotions of the morning, he wanted more. He wanted to be more comfortable and he wanted it now, despite their very visible location by the pool. For a few more seconds he savored their closeness before he tugged gently on Chester’s lip ring and then let him go. “We should go back upstairs,” he decided, running his hand up Chester’s leg. “Just start the whole day over. The right way.” 

“I’m game for that,” Chester answered, his lips parted as he breathed. He wrapped his hand around the back of Mike’s neck, pulling him in close again. His eyes shut, his lips molding over Mike’s in a needy way he wasn’t used to. Upstairs felt like a long ways away. _And we have a perfectly good lounge chair right here. Just a few more minutes._ His mind flipped to autopilot as he leaned and nudged, trying to get Mike into a better position. It wouldn’t take too much to get his lover on his back. 

“Someone is going to see us,” Mike whispered in Chester’s ear. “How about we go upstairs now?” He had no idea what time breakfast was supposed to be and he didn’t care. It felt almost urgent for them to finish what they had started.

“Okay,” Chester agreed quickly. He stole a last kiss, running his hand up and down Mike’s back, before he stood up. He put his hands on his hips, taking in long, deep breaths. “You know, it’s really beautiful out here,” he commented, his concentration hitting the trees just on the outside of the fence lined property. Greens, yellows and oranges dotted their branches, each one swaying ever so slightly like they were dancing. “I’ve never really noticed it before. I mean, it’s always been pretty. . .but this is breathtaking.” 

Not in the mood for scenery, Mike stood up and stood behind Chester, putting his hands on his boyfriend’s hips as he kissed the back of his neck. Normally he was into that kind of stuff, and the artistry of nature, but not this morning. He wanted to make sure things were right between them. Nothing else was important. “C’mon,” he said, nudging Chester toward the door. “We can come back later and enjoy the view. Right now all I want to look at is you.” 

Chester grinned. He was ready to spin around and dance his boyfriend back towards the house, making sure to keep their bodies close together, but he didn’t get to because a second later he heard:

“Chester! Mike! Oh, there you two are!” 

Both men turned to see Brad frantically run out from the house. His curly hair was flapping around, his hairnet gone. He had a spatula in one hand and an oven mitt on his other as he got to them, out of breath. 

“Brad?” Chester asked, squinting a bit from the light, “you okay? What’s wrong?” 

The chef bent over, his hands on his knees as he gasped. “I’ve been looking for you two all morning. Never thought to look out here,” he said, rolling his eyes at himself. “And you know how the boys are, useless.” He gave a Chester a knowing look before he went on. “But, I have to tell you guys something.” 

Chester looked at Mike, his boyfriend only shrugging. “Okay, tell us what?” Chester invited. 

“I was spooning out your guys’ oatmeal, and I saw it. Plain as day, right there in both your bowls,” Brad said as he finally stood up a little straighter, catching his breath. “I saw your futures.” 

Chester’s eyes went wide. “Really? Well?” he asked, a different kind of excitement running through him. He loved it when Brad got a reading on him. 

“I saw it,” Brad said, pointing his spatula at Chester and then at Mike, “you were sitting together. And you were happy. Relaxed. And it was raining.” He stopped for a minute, scratching the side of his head with his oven mitt. “And you were both wearing flannel shirts, which seemed really weird. I’ve never seen you in a flannel, Chester, but you had one on.” 

Mike bumped his shoulder into Chester as he laughed. “Oh my god, you’re wearing one of my shirts! I knew it, I’ve finally convinced you that comfort is number one over fashion!” The thought of Chester in one of his shirts was too funny. He gasped for air and begged Brad, “what else? Please tell me you saw more, this is awesome!” 

The chef smiled. He loved it when he got a glimpse into people’s futures, and even more he loved to share it with them. When it was happy. “Sorry,” he said, giving Mike a sympathetic look. “There wasn’t much else. But you both had the glow around you. When I see the glow, it means you’re at peace.” He smiled wide at them. “I thought you guys would like to know. Oh, and breakfast is ready. Oatmeal and pancakes,” he told them before he turned around and headed for the house. 

“Oatmeal?” Mike wrinkled his nose. “I’m not eating oatmeal. I draw the line at oatmeal. I think you’re a much better cook than Brad,” he said, pulling Chester back to him for a quick kiss. “I guess we have to have breakfast here, now, huh? It’s meal time, so… we better go before there’s no more pancakes. I’m not eating oatmeal,” he said again seriously. 

“My skills are nothing compared to Brad’s,” Chester said as he took Mike’s hand and led the way. “And yes, we need to hurry. When we get pancakes for breakfast, YRS suddenly turns into The Hunger Games. It’s not pretty.” 

****

Jason stood outside Chester’s room for a minute, his heart racing. Even though telling Chester about Mike hadn’t turned into a screaming match, it hadn’t gone nearly as easily as he would have liked. He hated having to be a hardass. He hated that look of defeat all the boys got when he or Mark had to put them in their place. He hated having no say in every little thing that Mark ordered him to do. He hated telling Mike about Mark, and hated telling Chester that Mike knew even more.

He looked down the hallway toward his bedroom. Mark had probably already gone downstairs to make sure Brad was getting breakfast ready on time. That meant he wasn’t watching what his husband was doing, and it was the perfect opportunity for Jason to sneak away and tell Ryan the news. Glancing at his watch, he decided there was plenty of time before he had to be down at the breakfast table, so with a last look over his shoulder, he crept quietly down the hall to Ryan’s room.

Once he got to the door, he looked around one more time, then carefully turned the knob and stepped inside quickly, closing it without a sound. With a sigh of relief he turned and looked toward the bed, where his lover was stretched out across the mattress diagonally, the blankets pulled up tight under his chin. Jason smiled at the way Ryan slept like a child when he was alone, every inch of skin covered completely as though he were trying to keep monsters from touching him in the night. He loved the way his lips parted slightly and he breathed through his mouth softly, never snoring. It was so nice to sleep in his arms, so peaceful and quiet with Ryan’s body wrapped around him and keeping him safe. He wished that was his reality every day. 

Jason made his way to the side of the bed and considered for a moment stripping off his clothes and climbing under the blankets to wake Ryan up properly, but he knew what a foolish move that would be. Instead, he sat down as gingerly as possible, trying not to awaken Ryan by surprise. He leaned over and kissed his cheek before he whispered in his ear, “Ry… baby, wake up.” 

Ryan’s dark eyes fluttered open before he jerked awake. His hand went out immediately, touching Jason’s arm, like he was trying to figure out if he was really there. “Jay? Is everything okay?” He started to sit up, the heavy blankets falling back as he did. It was unusual for his lover to be in his room in the morning. Normally, it wasn’t until later in the day when opportune times would pop up and Mark would be busy with other things. 

“Yeah, everything is fine,” Jason whispered, even though he was sure he couldn’t be heard on the other side of the door. He let Ryan sit up before he scooted closer, sliding his hands around Ryan’s neck and into his messy hair as he brought their lips together for a good morning kiss. “I’ve been awake forever, Mark’s been an ass already this morning, but somehow his issues have ended up benefiting us a little for once.” He stroked his hand over Ryan’s cheek before he dropped his hands, seeking one of Ryan’s to hold. “He woke me up complaining about Chester’s contract, and Mike.” 

Ryan looked down at their hands, smoothing his thumb over Jason’s soft skin. “I can see why’d he be weirded out by Mike being here.” He laughed a little, shaking his head before a yawn hit him. “I know Chester loves him, but he’s a little high strung. What, a, what did he say about Chaz’s contract? He’s still on for another two years, I think. Isn’t he?” He cocked his head, searching his lover’s face for an answer. 

Jason snorted softly. “High strung, that’s an understatement.” He shook his head before he got serious again, dropping his eyes down to the blankets. “He was worrying about Chester leaving, quitting because Mike told him to. He was up checking to make sure the contract was binding, which of course it is. You and I have gone through yours a hundred times looking for a way out, it’s impossible. But Mark had cooked this idea up while I was sleeping that he could just get _Mike_ in here to work with Chester and make sure that Chester doesn’t quit. Isn’t that insane?” He rolled his eyes and looked up to see Ryan staring at him. 

“Seriously?” Ryan asked, his eyes a little wide. “You are talking about Mike. Mike Shinoda? Mike Shinoda here?” He pointed to the dark gray blanket still covering his legs as he chuckled. “It’s too early for these sorts of jokes, Jay. Like Mark would ever bring someone like Mike into this. Not that Mike would ever do it!” His face was fully alight, until he saw Jason scowling at him. 

“I’m not joking around. Mark’s got it in his head that having Mike here would make Chester more loyal. That he can market them together as a mixed ethnicity couple and make all this money. He even said that you and Chester had run your course in terms of making fresh movies, and he was ready for something else.” Jason sat back, and for the first time, grinned at his lover. “Are you listening to me, Ry? He’s gonna partner you with someone else, and Mike and Chester are his new super couple. You won’t have to work as much, and we’ll be able to spend more time together. That by itself was enough motivation for me to make it happen. I was able to talk Mike into it.”

Ryan didn’t realize he’d been staring. He could see Jason’s face, but his mind was trying to compute every bit of information that had just been dropped on him. “Yeah,” he said, before he let out a little noise of confusion. “I mean, yeah, more time together is good,” he said, picking Jason’s hand up and kissing the back of it before he nestled it back on top the blanket. “But, so I won’t be working with Chaz anymore?” His shoulders slumped a little. He enjoyed working with Chester. They knew each other well, and more importantly, the only chemistry between them was for work and friendship. Chester was safe. He was responsible. And for the most part, he was drama free. “And you actually got Mike to agree to this?” he asked, knowing he wasn’t sounding as excited about all this as Jason. 

“I didn’t know you’d take losing Chester so hard,” Jason said cautiously. “I know you guys have worked together for awhile, but… I didn’t think it would be a big deal. Are you upset, baby? I’ll find a way to undo it all if that’s what you want, I don’t care what Mark thinks. I don’t want you to have to do anything more that you don’t want to do.” 

“No, I’m not upset,” Ryan said, squeezing Jason’s hand. “It’s just all a shock.” He let out a sigh, shoving his free hand through his black hair, which he could tell just by the feel of it, it was a mess. “I’m just used to working with Chester is all. It will be a change. You know I’m not big on change. And Mark’s going to let them be exclusive? Like, with no one else? Even Chester?” He shook his head in disbelief. “If Mike hangs around here any length of time he’ll figure out how Mark is. Chester’s not going to be be able to hide that from him for long. Mike will see just how un-exclusive Chester really is.” 

Jason shrugged. He didn’t want to admit he’d been the reason Mark had agreed to leave Chester alone, but he hated keeping things from Ryan. He cleared his throat and said cautiously, “well, Mark says he’s not going to mess around with Chester anymore. That’s part of the deal to get Mike to agree to come on board.”

Ryan’s dark eyes tripled in size. “Fuck, what?” His jaw was hanging open before he tried again. “I mean, are you serious? Like, nothing at all? Mark’s not going to do anything with him anymore? At all?” His voice hit a high note as he searched his lover’s face for the truth. Mark took what he wanted, when he wanted, and no one was an exception. No one got a free pass from the behind closed doors activities at YRS. 

“That’s what he said, but you know Mark. At any moment he can change his mind and he doesn’t give a fuck what’s been agreed upon.” Jason didn’t want to talk about it anymore. He was helpless to save Ryan from the same fate as the other boys, and he didn’t want to dwell on his failures. “All I know is I got Mike to agree, and I got Chester to agree, and maybe it will be a good thing for all of us. You know Chester’s been, hmmm… _difficult_ since Mike came along. Mark will be in a better mood if he can get better results out of Chester now, even if Chester is off limits. And maybe that means he won’t be worrying about what _you’re_ doing, since you won’t be part of his go-to couple anymore.” He let Ryan’s hand go, tracing his fingertips up his lover’s arm and circling over the warm skin. “I thought you’d be happy, Ry.” 

“I’m always happy about us getting more time together, it’s just a little mind blowing. I never thought Mark would agree to something like that. Especially about Chester, he’s always been -” but he stopped. He took a deep breath and reminded himself that despite his relationship with Jason, they were in fact talking about Jason’s husband, and he knew certain things still stung. 

Ryan cleared his throat before he switched topics. “You’re right about Chester being difficult. It’s been taking us twice as long lately to get things the way Mark wants them because Chester’s all...difficult,” he said, knowing he was using the same word again, but he didn’t care. “And you’re right about Mark, too. If he’s happy, it’s better for all of us. I just hope for Chester’s sake Mark doesn’t screw him and Mike over with this. I still can’t believe you got that little cherry to sign a contract, even with him finding out about everything.” He tossed his lover an endearing smile. “But if anyone could do it, it’s you. You have a magic tongue… in more than one way.” He raised a sly eyebrow. 

It was the perfect invitation, and Jason turned, sliding one leg over Ryan’s and sitting on his lap as he leaned forward to give his lover a little bit of action from his magic tongue. He pulled Ryan into him, latching their lips together in a celebration of what Jason considered to be excellent news. He wanted to push him down and slide next to him and forget breakfast, forget everything but the hunger they always had for each other, but he knew this passionate kiss would be as far as they could get this morning. Jason slid his tongue across Ryan’s bottom lip before he pulled back, breathless. “I wish I could show you everything this magic tongue can do, right now,” he said, running his hands over Ryan’s bare chest.

Jason was fully dressed, and Ryan had on boxers. The blanket and sheet was crammed between them, but all the layers hadn’t stopped Ryan’s body from reacting to his lover’s kiss. He slid his hands up and down Jason’s arms. “And why can’t we do that right now?” he asked before he wrapped a hand around the back of Jason’s neck and pulled him down, embracing their lips for another wet kiss. 

A few moments passed as the kiss heated up, and Jason couldn’t help but rock his hips against Ryan’s before his good sense caught up with him and he pulled back, mesmerized by the way Ryan’s eyes were already clouded with desire. “You know we have to go to breakfast. We can’t give him any reason to suspect, to think anything is going on between us. We’ve just got to make it a little while longer, until you can leave, and then we won’t have to be so careful.” He traced a fingertip down the side of Ryan’s face. “You should get dressed for breakfast. At least throw on a shirt so I won’t be staring at you the whole time.” He made a move to slide off of Ryan and let him get up.

“But I like it when you stare,” Ryan jested before he grabbed Jason’s arm, keeping him on his lap, just long enough to cup him on both sides and push him back on the bed. It wasn’t the most graceful move, but it got Ryan partially on top of his lover. He kissed him on his ear, and face. “I wish _we_ could have an exclusive contract,” he mumbled between kisses. Jason always smelled clean. It could be six in the morning or eleven o’clock at night, and he’d still smell like the Zest soap he was so loyal to. “And I can’t wait till I’m done being under Mark’s rules,” he added, petting his lips down Jason’s neck, his eyes shut. “We can get a place that’s ours. A place he can’t come. Right?” 

Jason nodded, holding tightly to Ryan’s back as he focused on his loving kisses. Ryan really loved him, and it meant everything in the world to him. “Anywhere you want, Ry, I’ll be there with you. I can’t wait either.” He hoped they would really end up together when it was all said and done. He didn’t want to think about what would happen if they got caught before their dreams could come true. “C’mon, Ry, you know we need to get up, I need to get out of here before everyone starts waking up.” His protests were weak as he leaned his head to the side and let Ryan continue to kiss him.

Ryan knew his lover was right, but that didn’t make it any less frustrating. He couldn’t help himself as he pressed his hips down into Jason’s one good time, letting out a soft moan before he said, “I know. If we must.” He blew all the air out of his lungs dramatically, letting his lips vibrate before he sat up, and rolled away. He stretched his neck, and rubbed his legs, waiting a moment for his partial erection to retreat before he stood up and walked over to the dresser. 

“I want to stay here and watch you get dressed, but I’ve got to go. I’m sorry,” Jason said as he sat up, straightening his shirt and eyeing Ryan’s back. “I’ll see you downstairs, okay?” He sighed as he stood up and headed for the door. “I love you… I’ll be thinking about your kisses all day, baby.”

Ryan looked over, his whole body tingling with euphoria. “I love you too,” he said without hesitation. A smile cracked his face as Jason blew him a silly kiss, and then he was gone, out the door. Ryan looked back at the dark, oak dresser. “Less than a year. I’ve got less than a year.” He took out a pair of light colored jeans, and pulled them on before he stepped over to the window, taking in the morning light and the nice view of, “Chester?” He leaned a little closer, watching closely as Chester and Mike were sitting side by side on one of the lounge chairs, looking very much on the verge of making out by the pool. _Holy crap. Chazzy actually got his boy to do something out in the open. Never thought I’d actually see it. Of course doing it with no one around by the pool is one thing. In front of cameras is totally different. This is crazy. . .and Mark’s going to leave Chester alone. God, I hope so, for Chester’s sake. He deserves to be happy._ He pursed his lips for a moment, watching. _I wish he’d leave us all alone. I just want to be with Jason, why can’t I have that? I can’t we have that? We’ve gotta get out of here._

****   
TBC


	22. Moving Forward

It felt good to walk down the hallway to their apartment behind Chester, and Mike was ready to be home. The past twenty-four hours at YRS had been mentally exhausting, and the distance between him and the house helped him to breathe a little bit easier. _I really want a hot shower and something comforting to eat. I can’t believe we’re going back in two days. Together. I’ll be going to work with Chester on Friday._

Mike bit his lip as he watched Chester unlock the front door. _Work. I’ve already missed two days this week, and now I’ll miss Friday, too. I didn’t even think about that when I decided to sign that contract. There’s no way I can keep teaching my lessons now. It’s like… wrong. Even if I had enough time, I can’t be working with kids while I’m doing porn. What would people say if they found out?_ A sick feeling crept over Mike as they stepped inside the loft. _I’m going to have to quit. I don’t even think I could swing part time. I would just feel wrong sitting there after… doing what I’ll be doing on the weekends. Even if it is just me and Chester. Even if it’s not the same, because we’re in love. We’re in love, and we just have to do this on camera for a little while. It’s not the same._

He went straight for the couch and sat down as Chester dropped his keys and phone on the bar. Mike’s mind clouded a bit as he thought back to earlier that morning. Before they had left YRS, Mark had insisted they watch two of the others perform a scene. _It won’t be like watching Ryan and Amir. Which was awkward, kind of… I mean, I didn’t expect to like watching them, I don’t think either of them are my type, but maybe it was just the whole experience, how naughty it felt to be watching someone else giving a blow job… I don’t know. This is all so fucked up._ Mike closed his eyes and leaned his head back on the plush cushion of the couch. _I don’t even know what this weekend will be like. What Mark will want us to do. Chester will know, I think._

“Hey, Ches? What do you want to do for dinner?” Mike asked, his mind still turning over the events of the past two days. “I don’t feel like doing anything except taking a shower. You want to order something?”

Chester crossed the room to stand behind the couch. He leaned down, wrapping his arms around Mike’s neck and shoulders, placing their heads together. “No takeout. I’ll make us something. How about hamburgers? Big, juicy hamburgers,” he hummed, licking his lips. “With lots of ketchup. And I think I have onion rings or something in the freezer I can pop in the oven.” 

“You and your ketchup,” Mike said with amusement in his voice. “I’ll never understand how you can drown literally everything in ketchup. But I love it, and I love you.” He reached back and stroked his hand over the back of Chester’s head. “Hamburgers are great, and you know I love onion rings. You want some help?” 

Chester ran his nose over Mike’s blue hair before he kissed him, and stood up straight. “No, I can manage. Go take your shower, and when you get out, there’s, ah, something I need to ask you.” He didn’t wait for Mike to say anything before he spun around and headed for the kitchen, the need to get food sizzling and cooking and steaming and whatever else he was going to concoct was strong. He needed to get it all ready, and Mike was a quick shower-taker. 

“If you’re sure,” Mike said, standing up and looking toward the bedroom. “I can’t wait to shower, but I hate leaving you alone in the kitchen. You do look really sexy in the kitchen.” He smirked as Chester wiggled his hips at him. “I’ve been wanting your ass all day, you know.” It was easy to forget everything outside the walls of the loft when they were inside together. 

“I know,” Chester said with a cheeky smile. “But go shower, and we’ll eat and then I’ll shower and then we’ll go upstairs. Or maybe just to the couch,” he suggested with a wiggle of his eyebrows before he turned back to the cabinets to find his favorite skillet. He popped it onto the stove before he headed to the refrigerator. He scanned their food stock quickly before he pulled out a container of pre-chopped onions and hamburger meat and then he fished the bag of onion rings from the freezer. 

Mike grinned back at his boyfriend before he headed up the stairs to get fresh pajamas. His overnight bag was where he’d left it, next to the wall on his side of the bed, neatly zipped and stuffed full of clothes for the week. The bed looked so inviting as he knelt down and opened his bag, moving a flannel shirt to the side to dig out clean underwear, a white undershirt, and red plaid pajama bottoms. It was going to feel so good to get clean, and even better to crawl back into their bed later on. As he stood up, bracing himself on the bed, he thought about the bed in Chester’s room at YRS. _I guess that’s our bed now, too. Right? If the whole point of me being there is that we’re together, then for sure we’ll be sharing his room. I’m going to have to make them put a lock on our door. If Mark and Jason can have a lock, so should we._

Other unanswered questions filtered through his brain as he made his way back downstairs and into the bathroom. Most of Mike’s thoughts were centered around actually filming, and what that would be like, but as he shampooed his hair and scrubbed his body, other things like who all would be around while they filmed, or whether or not he could go into the kitchen for a snack whenever he wanted it crossed his mind. He wondered how much free time they would have while they were there, or if there was hardly any at all. He worried over whether they would be tired of each other by the end of the weekend, then dismissed that thought as he rinsed all the bubbles off his body. _Signing on with YRS is supposed to make things easier. Not harder. I’m worrying too much. As usual._

When he stepped out of the bathroom he could hear the sizzling meat in the kitchen, and instantly all thoughts of YRS were wiped clean in favor of dinner. Tugging his shirt over his head, Mike stepped into the kitchen and leaned against the countertop. “That’s already smelling good, babe. I’m starving!” He licked his lips and watched Chester flip a burger over. 

A blissful chuckle escaped Chester’s lips. He loved to cook, and he especially loved to cook for Mike. “I hope they’ll taste as good as they smell,” he said, glancing over his shoulder for a second. “I’d love something to drink. See what we have,” he suggested with a nod toward the refrigerator. The steam from the skillet and the heat coming from the oven was making the small space where Chester was planted warm. 

Mike pushed himself off the countertop and reached out to lightly smack Chester’s ass as he crossed behind him to open the refrigerator. “Vanilla Coke. Sprite. Orange juice. Milk. And water.” He paused, looking toward the back of the bottom shelf. “And two beers.” Mike reached for a Sprite and waited for Chester to decide what he wanted. 

“Hmmm...my instinct tells me orange juice,” Chester said, flashing Mike a quirky smile. “But then I think, orange juice and ketchup? Gross.” He scrunched his nose and lips together before adding, “So Vanilla Coke, Sexy Boy. It’s a solid choice for this situation.” 

“Ice?” Mike asked as he popped the tab for his boyfriend. 

“Nope, I’m good.” He reached for the can, and took a long drink before setting it aside so he could flip the burgers one last time. He checked his watch, the onion rings should be just about ready. “So, are you feeling okay about everything still?” 

It was a loaded question. Mike leaned back against the countertop and watched Chester move confidently around the kitchen. He didn’t know how he was feeling. One minute he was fine and barely thinking about what he’d done, the next he was worrying over all of the unknowns. Depending on when he was asked, his answer would be different. Three seconds ago he’d been feeling fine, and now that Chester had asked, he was plagued with questions again. 

“I think I’m okay. Trying to wrap my head around it all, I guess. There’s a lot of unknowns for me right now.” He was speaking slowly, measuring out his words carefully. The last thing he wanted to do was start an argument. “I really just want to be sure that _you’re_ okay… I know this was all a big surprise this morning.” 

Chester paused for a moment. The idea that Mike was worried about him was almost a shock. “Me?” he said as he turned away from the oven. He rolled his eyes up and down Mike’s frame, over his downtrodden expression, the lack of luster in his dark eyes. Chester took the few steps to stand right in front of his boyfriend, his hands going to the counter on either side of Mike’s body. “Out of everyone involved,” he said, leaning his forehead to Mike’s, “I think I’m the one getting the most. I get you. I get for us to be together and no more fights about YRS. It’s almost like. . .” he hesitated as the word _blessing_ floated over his mind, but he wasn’t sure how Mike would take that. Instead, Chester wet his lips and said, “It’s almost like it’s meant to be. You decided to join YRS and then Brad had that vision about us being happy in the future. About us being at peace. That’s gotta be a sign that what we’re doing is right. Don’t you think?” 

Mike closed his eyes and placed both hands on the front of Chester’s t-shirt. “You really believe in that stuff, huh?” He waited the space of a breath before he went on. “I did this because I want to be with you. All the time. I don’t want to be apart anymore. Even if it means giving up my piano lessons, or giving up some privacy. I know that you’ll be with me, and that calms me down when I start to freak out a little. It’s just all of the things I don’t know that have me worried, but I’ll learn fast. I’ve always been a fast learner.” He could feel Chester’s heart beating steadily under one of his hands, and Mike kept his eyes closed for another moment, focusing on the strength he was taking from his boyfriend being right there, with him. The entire reason he’d decided to do porn was right there under his hands. “I’ve got you. That’s all I need, Ches.”

It was instinct. Chester twisted his head, ready to swipe a kiss, but he stopped. His eyes opened suddenly as he cocked his head and took a small step back, sniffing the air. “Hamburgers are done,” he said, before he turned around pulled them off the heat. “Not to ruin the moment,” he said, stealing a quick look at Mike. “But you don’t want burnt food. _We_ don’t want burnt food. And porn, you’ll get used to it. You just have to zone out the cameras and get over your nerves. We’ll be fine. And we’ll be together. It might be fun. It might be kinky,” he added with a sly smile. 

“Kinky,” Mike repeated, a smile forming on his lips. “See? I’m already looking forward to it a little more than I was. You always know the right thing to say.” He stepped over to the refrigerator again to retrieve the ketchup. “What else do we need? Cheese? I love cheese,” Mike said, waving the ketchup bottle around the side of the open door. 

“Cheese and ketchup. Is there anything else needed?” Chester asked sheepishly. “Oh, well, buns. We need hamburger buns. They’re in the bread box. Which I’m sure you know.” He pulled on his lobster claw oven mitt to take the onion rings out, the heat from the open oven hitting him immediately before he set the pan on the stove top. “So, I had a thought earlier and I’m kind of curious to see what you think.” 

“Oh, yeah, you said you wanted to ask me something,” Mike responded, his head still inside the refrigerator. “There they are,” he said, pulling out a jar of pickle slices along with the cheese and ketchup and bumping the door closed with his hip. “I have to have pickles, too. So what’s on your mind?” He placed all of his hamburger components on the counter and reached for the buns.

Chester took two plates down and sat them on the counter, just as Mike got the buns out. “I know that today has already been a lot, so this is probably really crappy timing to ask you this,” he said, keeping his hands busy as he moved from the counter to the stove to dish out their hamburgers. “But what do you think, or, I mean, what would you say if I, you know, asked you to move in here with me?” He shut his eyes, a slight cringe shifting through him. They were already spending almost all of their free time together, and now they’d be working together, too. Moving in together might be smothering. _He’s going to say no. He’s going to say it’s too much. I should have waited. I shouldn’t have picked the day he signed up to do porn!_

“It’s been on my mind for awhile now,” Chester added when Mike didn’t say anything. He eased his eyes open, to see his boyfriend less than a foot away from him. 

All of the doubts Mike had about whether Chester really wanted him to be around all the time vanished when he’d swung around to see his boyfriend’s eyes tightly closed and heard the uncertainty in his voice. _He thinks I’m going to say no!_ He stepped forward as Chester opened his eyes and slid both hands around his waist. “Really? You want me, here, with you? All the time? Of course, you know there’s not anything I want more than to wake up next to you every day.” Mike leaned forward and gently sucked Chester’s bottom lip into his mouth, playing with that lip ring he loved so much for a few seconds before he pulled back and caught Chester’s eyes. “I want to. I can’t think of anything better.” 

Chester’s arms wrapped around Mike’s neck, pulling him in for another kiss, this one through the smile that he couldn’t hold back. “I’ve never lived with anyone before,” he confessed. “So I’ll be a terrible roommate. But I think it’s going to be awesome. We can lay in bed every morning and goof off all day and -”

Chester gasped as he stopped, his mind snapping back to reality. “Wait,” he said, his eyes thick with thought, “what about your job? The lessons? Are you, are you going to keep doing that?” 

Mike shook his head, the warm fuzzy feelings of moving in with Chester waning just a bit. “I don’t think I can. I’ve got a full day Monday through Friday, and we have to be at YRS on Friday… plus it seems strange to be teaching kids and… well, doing porn on the side. I wouldn’t feel right about it.” He swallowed before he went on, “it’s okay, babe. I’ll still play here, you’ll get to hear me practice now. When we’re finished at YRS maybe I’ll finally go get my performance degree or something.”

Chester’s eyes dropped to the floor. He didn’t like this. He knew how much Mike loved his job. How much he cared about his students and what being involved in their lives meant to him. _It’s my fault. He has to give all that up because of me._ He looked over at the opposite counter and grabbed his drink before he headed for the table. He sat down, his chin resting on his hand as he watched Mike in the kitchen. “I hate that you have to quit. I mean, what about part time lessons or something?” 

“I thought about that,” Mike said as he picked up his plate. “I don’t think I can do it. It just feels wrong to be working with kids and doing the other. I don’t know. I’ll miss those kids, but I’m trying to think about what I’m gaining. I’ll have so much more peace of mind knowing that I’m not sharing you with anyone, Chester. That’s so important to me.” He sat down and looked meaningfully at his boyfriend. “It’s the whole reason I decided to do this.”

Chester nodded before he looked down at his Coke can, his fingers playing over the top of it. “I’m sorry,” he said. “I hate that you have to choose. Maybe you could go to school now. I mean, why wait?” he looked up, meeting Mike’s eyes for a second. “Or at least take a couple classes or however that works. I never went, so I don’t really know.” 

The whole idea hit Mike out of nowhere. “I never thought about that. The thing that’s been keeping me from pursuing it was money. But it seems like that might not be as big of a problem now, though.” The thought put a smile back on Mike’s face. “Maybe I’ll look into that, Ches. That’s a good idea.” He nodded to himself as he picked up his hamburger. “I guess I need to talk to Anna about moving out, too.”

“You should definitely look into the classes,” Chester agreed, a faint smile crossing his lips. He hated that Mike was going to give up his career, but going back to school was an exciting new path, and something Chester knew his boyfriend had always wanted. “And yeah, better drop that one easy on her,” he stated as he stood up and headed for the kitchen. He quickly shoved onion rings onto his untouched plate before he took it and the ketchup bottle back to the table. “Hope she can find someone to replace you. Replace you,” he repeated with a laugh. “As if, right? You’re irreplaceable.” 

Mike looked at Chester, watched him cover everything on his plate with ketchup, and knew there was no place he’d rather be. Everything would work out. Anna would find another roommate, and he and Chester would be together. Starting his degree would be a bonus if he could figure it out. He set his food down on his plate and reached over to squeeze Chester’s forearm as he said, “as long as you don’t replace me, I’ll be the happiest guy on the planet. I’m so glad I don’t have to leave anymore. Everytime I walk in the door with you, I’ll be home for real.” He knew he sounded sappy, but he didn’t care. “I’m excited. And forget what you said about being a terrible roommate. I’ve been here enough to know that is certainly not true. It’s gonna be awesome.” 

“I’m excited, too,” Chester said, loving the feel of Mike’s warm hand. “I think it will be fun. And I’m sure we’ll figure out anything that comes along. Me and you, Sexy Boy, it’s us against the world now.” He leaned forward, rising out of his chair enough to meet Mike halfway across the table to share a quick kiss before Chester mumble, “Now hurry up and eat. I need a shower and then we need to go upstairs.” 

Mike rolled his eyes at his boyfriend’s impatience. “You’re terrible,” he teased. “Here I am feeling all romantic and you’re rushing me through dinner so you can tackle me in the bedroom.” He picked up an onion ring and slowly took a bite, seeing how long he could take to eat one before he pushed Chester over the edge. He licked a stray bit of ketchup off his lips before he reached for another one. “What?” he asked innocently as Chester watched him with narrowed eyes. “I’m just enjoying this lovely meal you made for me.”

Chester curled his lips together as he gave Mike a death stare. “You know,” he said, shaking his head slowly back and forth, “I’ve never liked you. I’ve always hated you,” he insisted as he started to laugh. “Come on!” he wined suddenly as Mike moved in ultra slow motion, dragging an onion ring through his ketchup. “I can eat my whole plate by the time you get done with just that one! You’re just being evil.” 

Mike considered eating another onion ring, but he couldn’t keep a straight face as he felt the annoyance coming off Chester in waves. “Fine, fine,” he chuckled, picking up his hamburger. “I’m too hungry to mess with you anyway. Now _you_ hurry up and eat and I’ll clean the kitchen while you shower. We’ll get to bed much faster that way,” he added with a wink.

Chester was already shoveling food into his mouth. “And I didn’t mean that thing about hating you. I actually love you almost as much as ketchup,” he said, between gulps of food and soda. The race was on now. He just needed a few minutes to swallow everything down. Then he could jump in the shower, and then he could jump Mike. His mind was already going to the happy place of lots of food and sex as he gobbled up his last bite of hamburger. 

In record time, Chester’s plate was empty, and Mike waved him off to the shower. “Go on, I’ve got this. And I’ll meet you upstairs.” He watched Chester scurry away, and then his eyes landed on the bottle of ketchup. _Almost as much as ketchup. You better watch out, ketchup bottle. There’s only enough room for one of us here._ Mike chuckled to himself as he thought about what a dork he was inside his own head. It was a good thing Chester couldn’t hear all the things that happened in his mind. He popped the last onion ring in his mouth as he stood up and took both plates into the kitchen to clean up so he could get upstairs before Chester was finished showering.

****

Leaving Red Pelican Music for the last time felt like a major turning point in Mike’s life, and he walked down the sidewalk with his hands stuffed in the pockets of his hoodie, his head bowed to the ground. The last piano lessons he was going to teach for at least the next two years were finished, and he hadn’t even gotten to say goodbye to all of his students. The astonished acceptance he received from the studio manager when he told her in the morning that he was leaving, effective this afternoon, made him feel horrible. He hadn’t even been able to give a two week notice, not with Mark expecting him at YRS with Chester in the morning. 

_The decision has been made. I’ll be working with Chester. It’s what I want… sort of. Well, not really. But it will keep him with me, and not with anyone else. And I need him. He’s the only thing I have._

Mike looked up, squinting against the sun as he assessed where he was. He was meeting up with Dave at their favorite burrito place while Chester was at karate. It had been weeks since he’d seen his best friend, and there was plenty to tell him. _Not about the porn. But I need to tell him I’m moving in with Chester. And then I have to tell Anna. I hope she’s not too upset._ He ran his hand over his hair as he caught sight of Dave waiting for him on an outside bench.

The redhead stood up with a smile as Mike came to a stop in front of him. “Hey, man! Surprised you’re on time, coming from work. You never leave the studio on time,” Dave said. “You must really be hungry.”

“Yeah, you know me. I’m always hungry,” Mike responded, trying to infuse some enthusiasm into his voice. “How’s it going?”

Dave made his way to the front door and pulled it open, motioning for Mike to lead the way. “Same stuff, different day. Loads of classwork and professors breathing down my neck. I need a break.” 

They walked up to the counter, both already knowing exactly how they wanted their burrito made. In a few minutes they were sitting across from each other making small talk, the foil wrapped concoctions in front of them. Mike had just started to peel the end of his foil down when Dave asked, “so how’s Chester?”

Mike had introduced the two several months ago, and they had hung out a few times, but there was always something uncomfortable between them. It felt a little like jealousy on both sides, and Mike hated being in the middle. Dave was his childhood best friend. Mike wanted the two most important people in his life to get along, but Dave was always asking probing questions that Mike didn’t have the answers to. Just like now. Mike knew the casual question would lead to others he didn’t want to answer. He didn’t like hiding the truth about some things from Dave, but he really had no choice.

“He’s good,” Mike said before he took a bite of his steak burrito. Inside the flour tortilla were black beans and rice, cheese and guacamole, lettuce and pico de gallo, all mixed together with his steak. “Damn, this is always so good.” He licked his lips and felt his mood lifting a little. “I hardly ever eat here anymore, Chester cooks almost every night.” Mike went for another bite as Dave raised an eyebrow.

“I wish I had someone cooking for me all the time,” he offered before he took a bite of his own dinner. They chewed in silence for a moment before Dave asked, “so you’re practically living there, huh? Dinner every night? I know you. Once you eat you’re comatose. I bet you aren’t driving home after all these fabulous meals.”

Mike nodded. “I told you that. I told you I was spending a lot of time there. But you’re right, we actually talked about that recently. I think I’m gonna make it official and move in with him.” He peeled the foil down to expose more of the steak burrito as he waited for Dave’s reaction.

There was a few seconds of silence before Dave cleared his throat and looked at Mike seriously. “Already? Mike. How long have you been dating?”

“Over six months. That doesn’t seem like “already” to me,” Mike said, making air quotations with his fingers. “Besides, you just said it yourself. I’m hardly going home anyway. What’s the use in continuing to pay rent for somewhere I’m not living?”

Dave narrowed his green eyes thoughtfully as he watched Mike with his food. He was worried about his friend. Chester was his first real relationship, and Mike was so attached to him, and had been from the very beginning. He didn’t want to think about what might happen if things went south with their relationship. “Well… what if things don’t work out? Anna will have already found a new roommate, and then where will you go? You had a hard enough time finding a place when your parents bailed.” He pointed his burrito at Mike as he spoke, little bits of rice falling into the paper lined red basket on the table.

“What makes you think it won’t work out?” Mike asked defensively. “And I don’t want to talk about _them_ ,” he continued, a little bit of venom in his voice. “They made selfish decisions. Chester is the opposite of selfish.”

With a sigh, Dave placed his burrito in the basket and crossed his hands on the table in front of him. “I’ve just had friends move in with girlfriends before, and when it all goes south, it’s a huge ordeal to try to get out. You know how terrible the housing market is here, Mike. Everything is so expensive!”

It was true. Money was the reason he lived in the tiny one room he had at Anna’s place. But that wasn’t going to be a problem anymore, not with YRS in the picture. Mike looked out the window and decided to just get it all out in the open. Most of it. “I’m not worried about the money so much, I’ll be saving money living with Chester. And I’ll be making more money, too. I’m going to start working at his company. He, um, got me a spot with them.” _There. That wasn’t so bad._

Dave raised his eyebrow in question. “You’re not teaching anymore? Since when?”

“Today, actually,” Mike said, reaching for his water and taking a sip before he went on. “I start the new job tomorrow.”

“Wow. I… don’t even know what to say. I never thought you’d give up teaching. I thought you were going to try to go to school for that eventually.” Dave’s eyes were incredulous. He didn’t even know where any of this was coming from. 

“Going to school takes money I don’t have,” Mike pointed out. “You know this. You’ve got parents who care, who are helping you out. Mine don’t give a damn about the arts and won’t finance a penny of my education unless it’s something they think is worthy enough for me.” Mike took an aggressive bite of his burrito and chewed angrily, the thought of his parents spoiling the taste. 

With a long sigh, Dave suggested, ”I don’t know, Mike. I just… maybe you should just hang on to the apartment a little while longer, just in case.”

“Just in case? Just in case what? I don’t need a backup plan,” Mike said stubbornly. “That just makes me look like I don’t trust Chester. That’s not the message I want to send in our relationship. We’ve worked hard on that trust.” _If he only knew how much I struggle with that already. If he only knew how that lack of trust has gotten me contracted into porn._ He looked down at the table. He couldn’t tell Dave any of that. 

“I think sometimes you’re _too_ trusting of him,” Dave shot back instantly. He wasn’t trying to be vicious, he just wanted to make sure Mike was thinking things through. “For someone who was so cautious getting into a relationship in the first place, you sure seem to have signed your life over to Chester already. I know you don’t want to hear this, but maybe it needs to be said.”

It was Mike’s turn to set down his dinner. He could see Dave’s perspective, and he didn’t even know all of the truth. There was no way he could tell him the real reason behind leaving his job, and it really didn’t matter anyway. He pushed his chair back and stood up. “You know, I’m really not so hungry right now. I think I’m going to get a bag and take this home.” 

Dave shook his head and watched Mike grab a to go bag from the counter, then carefully rewrap his burrito to take home. “Mike,” he started cautiously, “I didn’t mean-”

“It’s okay,” Mike interrupted. “I know you’re coming at this all from a good place, but I don’t need this right now. This is what I want, and I thought you could be supportive for once instead of questioning the hell out of everything I do. It’s fine,” he dismissed as Dave opened his mouth to object. “I’ve got to talk with Anna anyway. I’ll catch up with you later.”

Before Dave could say another word, Mike was out the door, leaving his childhood friend behind, staring after him. 

_I don’t need a backup plan. This is what I want. Right? It’s not all exactly the way I thought it was going to go, but it’s just a bit of a sacrifice for the the next two years. Two years and we’ll be away from YRS and together. I don’t need a backup plan. I don’t._ Mike swallowed hard against the lump in his throat as he made his way back to his car, doubts creeping their way back into his mind. 

****

Anna sat on the couch, her elbows on her knees as she leaned forward, thumbing through a magazine. She glanced at the clock. She still had a few minutes until she needed to check on the strawberry flavored cake she’d popped in the oven. Usually she wasn’t one for baking, or cooking for that matter, but she was having a friend over later. She’d already cleaned every inch of her apartment - other than Mike’s cave that he didn’t like her to be in - and now all that was left to do was finish the cake and make some tea. 

_Mike. I wonder if he’ll be home tonight? Not that I mind, he lives here too. But he’s been gone so much lately, it almost feels like I live alone. At least Talinda is coming over. I could use some company. And she loves strawberries._

She could already smell the sweet treat and was about to get up to go pace around the kitchen to wait the last few minutes, when the front door opened and Mike stepped in. Anna took a moment to look him up and down. He almost looked like a stranger. His hair and clothes looked normal - jeans and a flannel over a darker t-shirt, but his face seemed different. Like he was upset. Or concerned. Or worried. Or maybe all three. “Hey, roomy,” Anna called as she stood up from the couch. “Long time, no see.” 

The smell of strawberries hit Mike’s nose immediately. “Hey,” he said as he looked over their living room. “Looks good in here, Anna. What’s cooking?” Whatever it was, he knew it wasn’t for him, she wasn’t even expecting him home. 

“It’s cake,” she said, her lips parting to a smile as she sidestepped the coffee table and headed for the kitchen. “And do you really think it looks good in here? I moved some of my books and organized a bit,” she said, twirling her fingers toward the living room. “I’ve got a friend coming over and I don’t want her to think I’m a total slob.” 

“Oh, damn, I’m sorry,” Mike apologized, even though there really was no reason to. He didn’t want to be in the way, and he certainly didn’t want to have this conversation now, knowing Anna had company coming. He didn’t want to upset her. “It does look better in here,” he offered as he went into the kitchen. He didn’t know what to do now, his half eaten dinner in the bag he was holding, his plans for talking to Anna about moving out derailed. “What time is she coming?” 

“Not for another hour or so. We’re going to have cake and tea. . .maybe a little wine while we watch a movie.” Anna could hear the excitement in her own voice. It had been awhile since she’d had anyone over. Between studies and work, life had been busy. She went to say more, to tell her roommate about Talinda Bentley, the new cosmetology student in one of her classes, but she stopped. Mike was clutching a takeout bag in front of him, his entire being reminding her of a lost boy. “Are you okay?” she asked, leaving thoughts of cake and Talinda behind for a second. “I’m sorry, Mike, I didn’t really expect you to be here tonight. You spend every night with Chester. But you can stay. I’ve got cake,” she offered just as the timer on the stove went off and she rushed to pull her creation out of the heat. 

Mike didn’t want to intrude, but that cake smelled really good. He watched Anna set it on top of the stove and wondered what kind of frosting she was going to put on it. “I could go for cake,” he said, setting his bag down on the counter. Even if he didn’t tell Anna tonight he was going to move out, Mike knew he needed to tell Anna that he wasn’t coming home for the weekend, at least. “If you have time, you know… I kinda wanted to talk to you about something, but it can wait until later.” 

Anna pulled her oven mitts off and turned to face him. She knew something was going on, and it was almost a relief to hear him offer to tell her, rather than making her pull it out of him. “I’ve got time,” she said. “What’s up? Is everything okay?” 

“Yeah… yes! I mean, well… damn.” He took a deep breath and figured he’d just come out with it. “Chester asked me to move in with him.” Mike couldn’t help the smile that crossed his face as he thought about it again. “I know you and I talked about it a while back, and I’m not gonna stop paying rent until you find another roommate,” he rushed to say, hoping she wouldn’t be too upset with him. 

Anna’s mouth dropped open. She hadn’t been expecting good news to come out of Mike’s mouth. Not with the way he’d been looking. “Oh, Mike, that’s fantastic!” she squealed as she hopped across the room and pulled him into a quick hug. “I’m so happy for you!” She patted him on his back before she let him go. “I knew it was going to happen,” she said, her hand gesturing out in front of her. “Wow, this is such a big step. I know you two spend a lot of time together, but are you sure about this? Not that I’m trying to discourage you, just, you know, as your bestie over here.” She pointed to herself, her smile wide. “It’s important I ask these kinds of things.” 

Everyone wanted to second guess him. Mike bit his bottom lip for a moment as he tried to figure out why, but decided to just let it go. He was going to do what he wanted to do. “Yeah, I’m sure. I’m always there, anyway. You know? And… I’m ready for that kind of commitment. And Chester is, too. So, it’s happening. I just don’t want you to be upset. I don’t want to leave you in a hard place.”

“Mike, I’m not upset,” she assured him quickly. “I’m happy for you. And I’ll find another roommate. Just give me a few weeks, and I promise I’ll get someone in here,” she stated, her tone taking a serious twist for a second before she asked, “So, how did he ask you? Was it romantic? Or was it more like, you guys decided together kind of thing?” 

Mike leaned against the countertop, a smile breaking over his face as he thought about the previous evening. “He was making me dinner. I think he thought I was gonna say no when he asked. It was sweet. He just, asked, and I said yes. I guess that’s like deciding together.” He shut his eyes for a second and thought about the sweet kisses they’d shared in Chester’s kitchen. “It’s going to be so awesome, Anna. Thanks for being cool about this.” 

Anna waved her hand through the air. “I’ve been expecting this. I’ve actually already got some feelers out for a new roommate. What did your parents say when you told them you’re moving in with Chester?” she asked, just before her eyebrows pinched together. “Or, have you told them yet?” 

_My parents. They don’t even know I have a boyfriend. I don’t even think they would care that I’m moving in with Chester, they certainly didn’t give a fuck where I was going to end up when they left._ “Um… well, they don’t even know about Chester. I haven’t talked to them in months.” Mike ran his hand through his hair nervously. “I don’t know if I even need to tell them.”

Anna let out a sigh as she pushed a strand of hair from her face. “Mike, you really need to tell them. I mean, at least let them know you’re moving. A forwarding address sort of thing. But maybe they’d like to know that you’re in love and moving in with someone. That’s a big deal.” 

He scoffed at the idea that they’d want to know anything about his life. If they cared, they wouldn’t have left. “Maybe,” he mumbled, his eyes landing on the cake again. “I don’t want to even get into it with them. Nothing I do is ever good enough. I don’t want to hear their opinion about Chester, either. I don’t want to hear their opinion about any of it. Me being in love or us living together.” Mike shook his head, wanting to drop the subject completely. “Are you gonna frost that?” he asked, trying to change the subject. 

Anna knew her roommate well, and even though she had occasionally gotten him to open up about his parents, she knew on this day, the subject was closed. “Not yet,” she said, agreeing to the subject change. “It needs to cool. Then I’ll cover it with french vanilla icing and I have fresh strawberries in the fridge to put on top. I should get them cut up.” She turned and pulled down a small bowl from the cabinet before she went to the refrigerator. “So when are you moving out? That poor room of yours is stuffed full. Does Chester have enough space at his place?” she asked as she sat the clear plastic container of fruit on the counter to search for a knife. 

Relieved to be moving on from his parents, Mike shrugged his shoulders. “I’ll probably take some stuff with me tonight, but honestly? I’ll probably get rid of some of it. No need for two beds, and I’m not sure about my dresser… I don’t have a ton of clothes anyway. I’m sure we can make space, Chester has a giant closet.” He paused in doubt as he thought about all of the clothes his boyfriend owned. “Well, I might need my dresser. I need to talk with him about that. But, there’s space for my keyboard, and a perfect spot for my art stuff, and past that, I don’t really need anything else. Chester’s got everything.”

He glanced around the kitchen, and thought about whatever might be his in their shared space. He didn’t need any of it, and there was no sense giving it to someone else if Anna might want to keep it. “I’ll probably just take my clothes and my music and art stuff, actually. If there’s anything of mine that you want to keep, let me know, otherwise I’ll sell what I can and trash the rest.”

“That’s so nice of you, Mike,” she said as she stopped her strawberry slicing to offer him a thankful smile. “If you want to leave any of your furniture, that would be good. And kitchen stuff, if you don’t need it,” she said, her eyes darting over to the blender, the blender Mike had bought and she ended up using more than he had, “then I’d appreciate anything you want to leave.” 

Mike laughed, thinking of Chester’s arsenal in the kitchen. “You can have everything in the kitchen. Chester owns stuff I’ve never even heard of. I think he has every kitchen appliance and gadget ever made.” He stepped over and pulled Anna into a sideways, one armed hug. “Thanks again for making this easy. When Chester and I started dating it seemed like he was going to be like the others, but he’s not. I love him so much, and this is going to be a great next step for us.” He pushed the thought that surfaced of YRS out of his head. 

“I think so. You two are so good together. It gives me hope that maybe one day I’ll find someone too. Someone out of the blue, just like Chester was.” She looked down at her sliced strawberries and smiled. “I was serious about before. If you want to stay and have cake, you’re welcome to join us. Unless, Chester’s going to be waiting for you?” She turned her head, just enough to see Mike standing close by. 

“I don’t want to be in the way of your girl time,” he said regretfully, eyeing the cake. “Maybe while I take some stuff out to the car you could cut a piece for me to go? And Ches?” 

“You bet,” Anna agreed easily. She adored Mike, but she really was planning on it just being her and Talinda tonight. “Go get your stuff. I’ll frost you guys two big pieces to go.” 

“You’re seriously the best,” Mike gushed, excited to take cake home to Chester. “I’m going to go grab some clothes and my keyboard, and I’ll be back for the cake.” He started to make his way down the hall toward his room before he stopped and turned back to Anna. “Hey, did you mean it when you said you’d still dye my hair even if I moved out?” The thought of having to go back to his boring black hair was a little bit sad.

Anna took a few steps toward the hallway so she wouldn’t have to yell. “Sure,” she said, eyeing his blue head. “You’re my best customer, and I can always use the practice.” 

“Seriously. The best,” Mike said again, flashing her a smile. “Don’t go bringing home any more blue, though. I think next time I want to go red tips to match Chester’s hair.” Before Anna could say anything, he disappeared into his bedroom. 

****

Chester hummed along to the song in his head as he wiped down his kitchen table. He could already smell the coffee brewing in the kitchen, and according to his last text with Mike, his boyfriend should be walking through the door any minute. With cake. 

“Cake and coffee,” he mumbled to himself before he headed to the kitchen, tossing his wipe rag into the sink. He let out a small yawn as he pulled down two coffee cups. Karate class had been exhausting, and it had taken all of Chester’s energy to come home, shower, and get into a simple pair of pajama bottoms and matching yellow and black socks before he gave up. He looked down at his bare chest and stomach. He hadn’t even pulled on a shirt. _I need coffee. And the cake. Can’t believe Anna actually baked something. I hope it’s good. Even if it’s not, I’ll have to pretend. Eh, with enough coffee, I can drown out the taste if I need to._

He ran a hand over his flat mohawk, and then down his exposed arms before he headed for the couch. He’d wait to get his coffee until Mike got there. 

Outside, Mike sat in his car for a moment, taking stock of everything he had to carry inside. Ultimately, the cake and the keyboard were the most important, but he settled on the keyboard first. Nobody was likely to steal two pieces of strawberry cake from the front seat. He grabbed the stand and hooked the leg over one shoulder, then pulled the keyboard out with both hands. _Good thing there’s an elevator here. This thing is heavier than I remembered._

There was no mistaking the look of disappointment on Chester’s face when he entered the loft with a piano instead of the cake he’d promised. “Hey, babe,” he called cheerfully, laughing at his boyfriend’s expression as he walked over to the couch and set the keyboard down before he pecked him quickly on the lips. “I’ve got a few other things in the car. I was going to ask you to help me, but I see you’re ready for bed.” He gestured to Chester’s half dressed state. 

Chester sat forward on the couch. “Are two of those things pieces of cake? Because if they are, I can come down and carry those up for you.” He got to his feet, and patted Mike on the shoulder affectionately. “Or I can help with everything. Sorry, Sexy Boy, karate class kicked my ass.” 

“I’ll let you carry the cake, as long as you promise not to eat my piece before we get back up here.” Mike assessed his boyfriend’s bare chest and quirked an eyebrow. “Though I’m not sure I should let you out shirtless in the world. Someone might see you and try to steal you away, cake and all.”

Chester started to laugh as the thought that tons of people saw him with even less on, on a regular basis, shot through his mind, but he didn’t say it out loud. Instead he tossed Mike a wonky look. “I’ll just slip on some sandals and be right with you. And I know that cake is your real concern in all of this.” He scooted past Mike to head for the stairs. His legs were sore, and every muscle was screaming at him, but he knew he needed to help carry stuff up from the car. 

He got his sandals and was back downstairs, feeling a little refreshed. “Coffee is ready as soon as we’re done,” he said, heading for the door. 

Together they were able to bring everything up in one more trip, Chester carefully protecting the cake as he carried a bag with some of Mike’s clothes as well. Mike opened the door to the loft and dropped the two bags he was carrying inside. “We’re going to have to talk about where my stuff is gonna go,” he announced, taking the bag from Chester and heading for the stairs. “This one is just clothes, but those bags there are music and art stuff. And there’s more at my apartment. I just brought with me tonight what I felt like I couldn’t live without for now. We need to make a plan.” He knew the bag of clothes would join the other bag he had on the side of the bed for now. Chester was going to have to make some room for him in the closet or figure out where they could put his dresser. 

“I’m too tired for plans tonight!” Chester called as he watched his boyfriend disappear up the stairs. “We can do it next week!” His shoulders slumped as he yawned and focused on the two pieces of cake that were now sitting on their counter. He opened the container and took a long whiff. The frosting looked amazing with the red juicy drips from the fresh strawberries running down the side. Chester licked his lips before he poured their coffee. He fixed his own, and then Mike’s, just as his boyfriend came back downstairs. “So how was dinner?” he asked. 

_Dinner. Damn. I left the rest of my burrito at Anna’s._ Mike frowned for a second, remembering how he’d stormed away from Dave earlier. “It was… well, it wasn’t very good. I left before I finished eating. Dave was kind of being an ass.”

Chester froze. His eyes shooting across the loft to zero in on Mike, who was over by the couch. “ _You_ left before you were done eating? Holy hell, Mike, what did he say that was so bad?” He picked up their coffees and cakes and balanced them carefully as he headed across the room. 

“Well… it wasn’t what he said, exactly. More like the way he was saying it.” Mike stopped, and tried to restart. “That sounds like something Anna would say. I don’t know. He was just asking if I was sure we were ready for this kind of commitment, and what if things didn’t go well, where would I go, and I told him I quit teaching and he didn’t like that either, and _then_ he brought up my parents, and I just didn’t want to hear it anymore. I just wanted him to be supportive and instead he was filling my head with all these what-ifs. I couldn’t take it.” He needed a couple of breaths at the end of that long run-on sentence before he could take a sip from the coffee cup Chester had just offered him. 

“I agree, that is an asshole thing to say,” Chester said as he sat his cup and cake down on the coffee table and plopped next to Mike. “And what does he mean, in case we don’t work out? Why wouldn’t we?” His eyes narrowed for a moment. “He doesn’t like me. That’s all it is. He thinks I’m not good enough for you, or some silly shit.” 

Mike wasn’t going to agree with that out loud. It wouldn’t do any good, and he knew it. “He’s always like that, Ches. He’s always got a plan A, a plan B, and then a plan C, too. I think he was just trying to make sure I was thinking about every possibility. I don’t think he dislikes you.” 

Chester rolled his eyes as he took his piece of cake. _He doesn’t dislike me, he hates me._ He took a deep breath, and decided to forget about Dave. He knew that he was Mike’s plan A, and that was all that mattered. He sliced through his cake, popping the first bite into his mouth and he savored the moist strawberry taste. “Mmmm,” he mumbled. “This is actually really good.” He swallowed it down before he asked, “So what did he say about your parents? What do they have to do with anything?” 

This was the last conversation Mike wanted to get into when he had strawberry cake in front of him. _I just want to enjoy something I’m eating today, is that too much to ask?_ He rolled his eyes and stabbed the cake with his fork, taking a bite before he looked at Chester. They never really talked about his parents, and his boyfriend looked genuinely curious. “They _don’t_ have anything to do with any of this. It was just a comment about how hard it was for me to find a place to live after they decided to up and move to Colorado.” Mike sighed and put his plate on the coffee table, then turned toward Chester on the couch and tucked one foot up under his butt. He really didn’t want to talk about this.

Chester waited a few seconds, using the silence to gulp down his last bite of cake before he set his plate on the coffee table, and picked up his steaming cup of java instead. “Why did they move to Colorado?” he asked, blowing over his coffee cup before he took a quick sip. “Did you guys used to live there or something?” 

“Nope,” Mike said bitterly. “I graduated and they decided they were finished supporting me if I wasn’t going to do what they wanted me to do. Once I told them I wanted to major in music, once I told them I was gay, it was like they couldn’t wait for me to turn eighteen so they could wash their hands of me. They basically said if I wanted to make piano my career I was going to have to figure it out myself, they weren’t going to pay for it. So I graduated and they decided to follow the dreams they’d had before I came along.” Mike tried to keep the emotion out of his voice but heard it shake anyway with suppressed tears. He’d never done anything wrong growing up, but they’d essentially abandoned him for their own selfish desires. If he ever had children of his own, he knew nothing they could ever do would make him leave them behind. 

He took a deep breath and reached for his cake again. “They left and Anna offered me a room. It was the best I could do at the time, and it’s been fine, but Dave’s right about the housing situation in LA… it’s hard, even with a decent job. You’ve got a great set up here.” Mike waved a hand around the loft. “I’m lucky you want to share it with me. Forget Dave, forget my parents, I’ve got you. You’re all I need.” 

Chester offered his lover a sad smile as he shook his head. “Jesus, Mike, why didn’t you ever tell me any of this?” He shifted on the couch, so they were facing each other. “And of course I’ll share. It’s not really mine anyway.” He shrugged his shoulders, his eyes dropping to the white fluffy rug under their feet. “My parents were always supportive. My mom, she still is. I haven’t told her you’re moving in yet, but you know how much she adores you. I can’t imagine how it must feel to not have that.” He reached over, cupping Mike’s knee that was up on the couch. 

With a shrug, Mike took another bite of cake and blinked a few times, willing himself not to cry. He swallowed over the lump in his throat without really tasting what he was eating. “ I don’t know. What’s the point in talking about it? I can’t change the fact that they left me here, and I don’t want to think about it. Anna thinks I should tell them I’m moving, but I don’t see why it matters. It’s not like they’re mailing me weekly care packages or anything.”

Chester looked down at his coffee. He knew it was a sore subject for his boyfriend, but somehow it hurt that Mike had never told him any of this. Part of being close - part of being in love - meant sharing all parts of their lives. That included parents. _Maybe he doesn’t trust me enough. Or maybe he thinks they’d be ashamed of me, so why share anything about them? God, I’m being selfish about this. Look at him. He’s miserable just thinking about it._

“Hey,” Chester whispered, gaining Mike’s big brown puppy eyes looking his way. “It’s going to be okay. We’re together and we’re going to make a life and if they don’t want to be in it, then that’s not on us, right? And they’re crazy for leaving you like that. Mike, you’re so amazing in so many ways, I could make a list. And if they can’t see that, then screw them. I’m with you on that one. But you should tell them you’re moving,” he added, giving Mike’s knee a squeeze. “Things change, and maybe they’re assholes at the moment, but if something happens and they need to find you. . .it’s just better to pass that kind of information along. Nothing worse than ending up in a family crisis and not being able to locate everyone involved.” 

“Fine. I’ll mail them a postcard,” Mike said stubbornly, finishing his cake and picking up his coffee. “I’m not calling.” 

“Okay,” Chester said, sitting back in his seat. “Don’t call. But I don’t have any stamps. Just so you know.” 

Mike cracked a smile at this boyfriend, who was looking very serious about his lack of stamps. “Damn it, all I need is one stamp. You’re going to force me to make a phone call just because you don’t have stamps.” He leaned his head back on the couch, his coffee cup resting on his thigh. “Later. I’ll do it later. It’s been a crazy day, and tomorrow morning we’re up and out the door early, first weekend away together… I just want to forget everything else right now and get in our bed and watch some tv. Or whatever else we can think of in bed,” he amended, knowing that watching tv in bed usually led to other things. 

Chester yawned as he sat forward, abandoning his coffee cup on the table. “I think I can be talked into some tv before I pass out. Snuggling sounds nice right about now.” He slowly stood up, scratching his nails up and down his naked side, leaving slight red marks. “And I know we’ve never talked about it before, but I’ll _never_ have stamps in the house. They’re weird. I just can’t do it.” He shivered as the thought of the small, square sticker like things popped into his mind. “I know that’s going to be a bummer at Christmas time when it’s time to mail out cards, but I usually get someone at YRS to do it for me. Or my mom. She likes stamps, but. . .” he trailed off, a cringe crossing his face. 

“Don’t even worry about it,” Mike said, placing his cup next to Chester’s and reaching for his boyfriend. “You’ve got me. I’ll take care of all the stamps, and I’ll eat the cauliflower off your plate for you. Anything you need, I’ve got it,” he assured him, amusement coloring his tone. “No weird sticky squares or scary vegetables anymore.” 

Chester pulled Mike up on his feet, and wrapped his arms around his neck. He leaned in, letting their lips find each other as they kissed, the taste of strawberries and coffee passing between them. Chester broke away first, his brown eyes drifting slowly open. “I love you. Come on, let’s go to bed.” 

****  
TBC


	23. A Change of Plans

Chester opened his eyes, his attention focusing on the clock. It was Friday morning, but it was early. Earlier than their alarm. He still had a good hour to sleep. Another hour to snuggle with Mike and forget that they would be going to YRS to work together for the first time. _He’s not ready for this. Maybe I’m not ready for this. Me being in front of cameras is one thing. I’m used to it. But Mike?_ Chester let out a sigh as he rolled over. Mike’s back was to him, his partner sleeping soundly. A faint smile crossed Chester’s lips as he scooted over, snuggling himself up against Mike’s backside, sliding his arm around his stomach. He shut his eyes, intending to drift back to sleep, but his fingers were already playing to get up and under the hem of Mike’s t-shirt. He could feel his warm belly skin, and as he did, happy thoughts fluttered over Chester’s mind instead. The desire to slide his hand down and explore over Mike’s pajama bottoms was stronger than his desire to fall back to sleep. 

Mike was comfortable, his pillow soft under his head and the sheets snuggly around him. Somewhere in his consciousness he felt Chester’s hand on his stomach, but he thought maybe he was dreaming. He shifted his body just a little and became aware that the solid warmth behind him was his boyfriend, and he wiggled his ass right up next to Chester’s crotch without even opening his eyes. It felt early still, too early to do anything other than fit their bodies together tightly and sleep some more. 

Chester pressed his hips against Mike’s bottom as his hand made wide circles under the other man’s shirt. Starting at his lower stomach area, he pulled his hand around over his belly button and up toward his chest, before circling back down. Each pass, he let his hand go a little lower. His fingertips brushed the waistband of Mike’s pajama pants, and then over it. He nuzzled his nose into the back of Mike’s neck, relaxing in the familiar scent of his body as his hand went a little lower. He could feel the cotton fabric, and the seam that created the all-important flap. Chester’s inner orneriness doubled as he felt himself starting to get hard - an early morning erection that he didn’t want to dismiss. 

He licked his dry lips a few times, before he pressed a kiss to Mike’s skin. “Are you awake, Sexy Boy?” 

“Mmmm,” Mike hummed, slowly giving up sleep in favor of potential morning sex. _I love the way he wakes me up. Even when I think I don’t want to wake up, he changes my mind. Fast._ He tilted his head back a little on the pillow, trying to encourage Chester a little bit more. “I’m awake. Kinda.” He felt back behind him to squeeze Chester’s naked ass in one hand, pressing his hard on firmly against him as he thought about pretending to be too sleepy so Chester would try harder. 

“Only kinda?” Chester murmured as he bucked his hips a little more. He glided his fingers over Mike’s crotch, blindly searching for the dick he knew was there somewhere. _Curse all his clothes. I’ve got to get him on board with both of us sleeping naked. Or at least in underwear only._ “You know,” he said, “there are scientific benefits to sleeping without so many clothes on,” he said, before he shut his eyes. He pet Mike’s skin with another kiss. “We could go into it, or you could just ditch all this stuff and see for yourself.” He rubbed his flat hand up against Mike’s limp cock as he spoke, already starting to feel it reacting as he pressed it gently with back and forth motions through Mike’s pajamas. 

“Scientific? Sounds really un-sexy,” Mike teased, enjoying the way Chester was touching him, bringing him more awake than he’d been a few moments ago. “No science. But you can keep doing that with your hand,” he added, starting to plot out his next moves.

“Mhm,” Chester mumbled, grabbing a piece of Mike’s skin and sucking on it as he pressed his hand a little firmer against Mike’s steadily hardening cock. It was starting to take shape, and as it rose, Chester could get a partial hold on it, as he rubbed as best he could. “This just isn’t doing it for me,” he finally said, letting Mike’s neck out of his bite. 

“Oh, it’s not?” Mike asked as he turned over, surprising Chester as he pinned him back onto the mattress with a silly grin. “It seems to me like you’re ready to go already this morning. You know, if _this_ is any indication.” He slid his hand down Chester’s warm, naked body until he had his boyfriend’s dick in his hand. Mike leaned over and whispered in Chester’s ear, “I think you’re lying about me not doing it for you.”

“Lying’s the wrong word,” Chester said, before he turned his head, wanting to grab a kiss from Mike’s lips. He didn’t care what they were calling anything, he just wanted to be close, and having Mike’s hand on his dick so early in the morning was glorious. Despite sharing a bed, early morning sex wasn’t in their standard routine. Chester felt Mike’s hand squeeze him a bit harder, and his insides scrambled in excitement as he pushed his tongue inside of Mike’s mouth. 

Mike knew what Chester was after but he released his cock anyway, smiling at the whine that came from his throat even as they kissed. For some reason this morning he felt devious, almost like there was a nervous sort of energy in his body all of a sudden. He knew they were headed out for his first shoot at YRS that morning but it felt like before that happened, he needed the closeness, the privacy of their own bedroom. Something possessive was building inside of him as he tugged at Chester’s lip ring with his teeth, sliding one leg over Chester’s body and situating himself between his boyfriend’s legs.

Chester let his legs be spread as Mike got on top. He shoved his hands up under Mike’s t-shirt as their kisses turned to pecks, and then sloppy deposits over each other’s skin and lips. “Take this off,” Chester pleaded as he pushed the shirt up as far as he could get it. 

Mike leaned on one elbow and let Chester pull the shirt over his head and one arm, then shifted to the other elbow and helped tug it the rest of the way off. “Better?” he asked, not letting Chester answer before he caught his mouth again, sucking and biting playfully on his lips. There was already heat between their skin as he felt Chester greedily running his hands down his naked back. The morning had escalated quickly, and Mike pressed his hips forward, creating a bit of friction on their lower halves. 

Chester reached down as far as he could, trying to push at Mike’s pajama bottoms. Their rocking motion was making his urges go into overdrive. He was already breathing heavy, his mind tied to every move Mike was making. He wanted more. He wanted more of his boyfriend’s skin. He got his fingers just under the waistband, shoving them back an inch or two before he gave up. He redirected Mike’s kisses to the side so he could say, “Pull ‘em down,” between labored breaths. 

“So demanding,” Mike murmured. Part of him wanted to say no and see how long it would take Chester to beg him, but the other part - the desperately horny part - was ready to be naked. He ran his lips down Chester’s neck, placing small wet kisses and little nips of his teeth here and there, savoring the little moans he was getting from his boyfriend. 

With a flash of confidence, he lifted up a little and moved to slide a hand under Chester’s back. “I’m not ready. Not yet. Turn over.” His tone of voice left no room for negotiation as he tugged on Chester’s side a little, backing up onto his knees to give his boyfriend some room.

The unusual request gave Chester pause, but only for a moment. His cock was wet, his body needy, and if his boyfriend wanted to touch him all over his back, then that’s what they’d do. Without a word, Chester did as he was told. He rolled over on his stomach, his hard on pressing into the mattress. Instinctually, Chester grabbed their flannel sheets with both hands, curling his fingers into them as he spread his legs, and bucked his hips to give his dick what it wanted - or what it would take for the moment. It wanted Mike, but they weren’t working on Chester’s timeline this morning. 

Mike smiled. He loved Chester’s ass, the way each cheek fit into the palm of his hand, the way it swayed while his boyfriend cooked to music only he could hear in his head. He flattened his hands against Chester’s skin and squeezed for a moment before running his hands up the firm muscles in his back. The view of Chester’s body stretched out on the sheets with his legs spread open looked as good as he’d thought it would. Mike reached inside his pajama pants to adjust his now undeniably hard erection, giving himself a couple of quick strokes while he was at it. 

He bit down on his bottom lip as he braced his hands on both sides of Chester’s head and lowered himself down, fitting his dick snugly between his boyfriend’s ass cheeks. He let his weight rest a little more on Chester’s body as he began a series of licks and suckles to the back of Chester’s neck, which was screaming for his attention. The skin there was soft and clean, and he spent a minute worshipping this area he didn’t usually get to spend a lot of time on… but with Chester underneath him on his stomach, and Mike on top of him, there was no escape. Mike pressed a kiss behind his ear as he wiggled his hips and pressed Chester a little further down into the mattress. His heart was racing with adrenaline and the anticipation of what was to come. 

Chester’s grip on the sheets tightened, his eyes closed as he let out a soft moan. He could feel Mike’s erection stabbing his ass, a pleasure he’d yet to experience with his boyfriend before this unexpected twist so early in the morning. Chester spread his legs a little more, allowing the motion. The friction. The heat. Mike’s wet kisses to his neck continued, before they slowly made it to his shoulder - first his left and then the right. He could feel Mike’s tongue and his hot breath as he licked swirls around one piece of Chester’s shoulder blade. 

Something inaudible came out of Chester’s throat as he raised his hips slightly, allowing a little weight to rest on his knees as they braced against the mattress. Now his dick had a little breathing room, and he could feel Mike’s occasional thrusts twice as much. Chester’s mouth was open as he breathed, as his mind flashed forward to what he wanted. He could feel Mike’s hard on between his ass cheeks. It pushed, and slid and poked, but it was covered. His boyfriend had two layers of clothes - pajama bottoms and underwear - between his dick and where Chester wanted that dick to end up. 

Mike’s kisses were working their way down Chester’s spine, and the anticipation of where this was all headed was sending every beautiful jolt of arousal to the max. Chester lifted his ass a little more as Mike steadily lavished affection on his sides, and the small of his back - all places that his boyfriend had never made a lot of use of before, like they were forbidden, but now Chester was basking in it. 

“I love you,” Mike mumbled as he sat back on his knees again. “You’re so fuckin’ hot.” He feathered his fingers across Chester’s skin and then boldly slipped one hand between his legs. He held his breath as he reached to cup his hand around boyfriend’s ball sack, gently massaging the spheres inside. The way Chester squirmed under his touch, the way his mouth went slack as he rested on the pillow, made Mike want more. He knew Chester wanted more, but he wasn’t ready to let him roll over again yet. He wasn’t finished exploring. 

Mike’s eyes skimmed over Chester’s body, appreciating the beauty of his pale skin, his slim hips, the roundness of ass. He slid the hand that had been caressing his boyfriend underneath, finding and wrapping his fingers around around Chester’s cock after he so helpfully lifted his hips off the bed. Mike’s stomach clenched in anticipation as he tried to get some leverage in the position he was in, though Chester was ready to go. All Mike was doing was prolonging the inevitable by teasing him.

Chester let out a moan, his eyes closed. “Miiiiikkke,” he managed to get out, before he went back to quick pants. His boyfriend’s hand was sliding up and down his length, a steady rhythm that was making Chester’s toes start to curl. He pushed back a little, raising his hips more to give Mike as much free reign as he wanted. With his ass in the air, Chester’s eyes opened, his focus hitting the clock. They still had time, and with where this was headed, Chester was happy for it. 

“I want you,” Mike whispered, leaning over Chester’s back and kissing his left shoulder blade again. “Before we have to go, I _need_ you, just you and me, alone.” He needed the private moments alone before the craziness the weekend was sure to be. Mike dropped a few more kisses on his back before he pulled on Chester’s side, silently encouraging him to turn over so he could kiss those lips he loved.

Chester felt Mike’s nudge, his signal, and everything calmed for a moment. He shut his mouth, allowing himself to breathe through his nose as he opened his eyes, ready to turn over so things could continue. _Even though this would have been something. Maybe I should ask him about switching up our positions._ The thought had barely crossed his mind just as his cell phone started to ring. 

It was loud and abrupt, and Chester felt himself jump. “Fuck,” he swore as he let out a sigh and gave his cell phone over on the nightstand a death glare. “Who the hell is calling so early?” For a few seconds he debated leaving it. Whoever it was could call back. He was on a limited time schedule, and as he shifted around to see Mike’s big brown eyes staring his way, the last thing he wanted to do was talk on the phone.

With a groan, Mike looked over at the nightstand, at the phone that was interrupting his morning. “Leave it,” he said, “if it’s important they’ll call back.” The allure of the lip ring was too much, and Mike leaned in to catch Chester’s lips in a fierce kiss before he could say anything. The sound shrieking from Chester’s phone stopped after a few more rings, as Mike pressed his tongue forward and stole more kisses. He felt Chester’s arm wrap around his waist and pull their bodies together, each of them moving their hips in rhythm for a few moments before the voicemail on Chester’s phone chimed.

The sound registered somewhere in Chester’s mind as he sucked on Mike’s bottom lip. Whoever it was, he’d call back when they were done. He slid his hand up Mike’s naked side, before his fingers drifted down to tease and tug on one of his boyfriend’s dark nipples. Chester broke their kiss, his lips cascading down Mike’s jawline and then to his neck. His mind was off, his teeth wanting to sink into Mike’s warm skin just as his phone blared into life again. 

Chester let out an agonized sigh. “Shit,” he grumbled before he kissed Mike’s neck again, quick and wet. “Stay,” he ordered with a sly smile, before he groaned and grumbled to turn over and reach for his cell phone. “It’s work,” he muttered before he hit the call accept tab and offered a frustrated, “Yeah?” 

“Chester. It’s Jason.” There wasn’t any warmth in his voice, and he knew it. He was in a mood. “You guys don’t have to come into YRS today. Or at all this weekend. Mark and I will be away until late Sunday.” Jason grimaced as he spit out the words. He was bitter over the change of weekend plans. 

Chester’s hormone-driven, foggy mind suddenly snapped to attention. “What?” he asked as he sat himself up, swinging his legs off the side of the bed. His erection was still very present, and he resisted the urge to touch it while on the phone with Jason. That would just be wrong and creepy. “Why? Is everything okay?” 

Jason sighed. He really didn’t want to get into it, but just the fact that Chester asked made him suddenly want to cry. Everything was such a mess. “Everything is fine. Mark just wants to… get away, the two of us, this weekend. I kind of had other plans.” He stopped, considering how much he wanted to say. “Doesn’t matter. Bottom line is, you guys are off. Enjoy your time together.”

Something uneasy settled over Chester’s mind as the image of Ryan popped into his head. _Damn._ “Yeah, yeah, okay,” he said, knowing his tone was now down. “Hope you guys have a good time. I guess,” he said with a slight cringe. He knew Jason wasn’t going to have a good time wherever Mark was going to drag him off to. “I’ll talk with you later,” he offered before they both said goodbye. Chester sat, staring at his phone for a second. Mark whisking Jason away for an entire weekend was odd. Weekends were prime times for shooting, and everything else usually bowed to that. 

Mike scooted over to rest his chin on Chester’s shoulder. “What’s up? Everything okay?” He slid an arm around his boyfriend’s stomach and looked down at the dark phone in his hand. 

Chester nodded. “Yeah, I think. For us, anyway,” he said, his mood lifting as reality hit him. “That was Jason. We don’t have to go to work this weekend.” He reached an arm up and over his shoulder, grabbing loosely onto Mike’s head and hair. “You dodged the bullet for one more week, Sexy Boy.” 

The feel of Chester’s hand in his hair was always a turn on, and hearing that they didn’t have to leave the bed if they didn’t want to made everything a thousand times better. “Really? That’s not what I expected at all. You’ve never missed a weekend since we’ve been together. What happened?” 

Chester let his arm fall back to his lap before he leaned against Mike. “He said that he’s going away for the weekend. Him and Mark both. . .sounded like it was a last minute Mark plan. A last minute romantic getaway.” His shoulders slumped a bit. “It’s weird. Usually nothing interferes with weekend shooting. It doesn’t make any sense. And Jason doesn’t even want to go. You could hear it in his voice because -” he flipped his fingers out in front of him. “Well, you know why.”

He did. He knew exactly why Jason was upset, and despite Mike’s dislike of YRS and everyone in the business, he felt sympathy for the man. Even if he disagreed with the cheating that was going on behind Mark’s back, a little part of Mike understood why Jason didn’t want to go. It was hard to be in love. He couldn’t imagine what it must be like to be in love with someone that you couldn’t be with freely. But that wasn’t a concern of his at the moment. Right now all that mattered was that he and Chester didn’t have to go to work - and Mike wanted to take advantage of that.

“Well, let’s not worry about Mark and Jason,” Mike suggested, sliding his hands down to Chester’s hips. His stomach rumbled, drawing his attention to the fact that they had yet to eat, and he was hungry. “Why don’t we get something to eat? I can practically taste pancakes right now.” Mike kissed a few tiny pecks to Chester’s neck. “I can make pancakes, you know.”

Chester’s eyes dropped to his wilting cock. _The mood’s gone anyway._ He let out a sigh as he pushed his thoughts to something more positive. Breakfast would be good. He and Mike could fill their bellies with pancakes and coffee. The rush to have each other was gone, now that their weekend was so unexpectedly free. A small smile tugged at Chester’s lip. _We can eat and decide what to do with the next two days. Then we can get back to this. We can take our time. Maybe we can even talk about things we both want. Mike on top. I’d love for us to try that. He felt so good before._

Chester cleared his throat before he said, “Pancakes sound good. And coffee.” He went to erase Jason’s voicemail, figuring it would just be a reiteration of what he’d said on the phone, but Chester stopped the moment he tapped on the voicemail icon. “Fuck,” he whispered. “That first call wasn’t Jason. It was Ryan.” He didn’t wait. He hit the play button, and then the speaker tab so it would play loud enough for Mike to hear it too. 

“Chaz, Chaz, I know it’s early but Jay just called me. He said we’re not working this weekend. Mark’s making him go to Malibu or something like that. Some place romantic! And Jason doesn’t want to go, but Mark is inisisting. He’s insisting on a weekend, Chester, what does that even mean? And now I’m not going to get to see Jay at all, probably not till next week! Jay is miserable and I’m feeling like shit and I just wanted to talk.” 

There was a pause - a blip of dead air - before Chester and Mike heard Ryan sniffling on the other side before the message continued. “Just call me back if you can. I hate feeling like this and I know Jay does too, but we’re stuck. A weekend. He did this on a weekend, it’s like he did it on purpose. Do you think he knows about us? God help us if he does! Okay. I’m stopping. I’m going to drive myself insane if I start thinking that Mark knows more than he does. What if he takes Jason away for good? Fuck. No, I’m not even going there. Damn it. Call me, Chester, please! Tell Mike I said hi.”

The message ended, Chester’s lips parted as his heart had started to pump a little faster as Ryan’s rambles had gotten more and more desperate. 

Mike pulled away from Chester and scooted forward to sit next to him, hanging his legs off the bed and smoothing his bare feet over the floor. They were silent for a moment before Mike looked down at his hands and suggested, “you should call him back.” He felt Chester’s eyes on him but he didn’t look up. “He sounds really upset, and… I don’t know… I guess I kinda get where he’s coming from. I hated knowing you were with someone else. It drove me crazy. I wish I’d had someone to talk to about it.” 

It took Chester a moment to process what he’d just heard. “Re-really? I mean, he sounds more than upset, but I don’t want you to be upset too.” He hung his head for a moment before he added, “thanks, Mike. Ryan can get real worked up real easy, like you heard.” He lifted his phone for emphasis. “How about you go make us those pancakes, and I’ll call him back, but just until breakfast is ready, okay?” 

“Want anything in your pancakes? I think we have blueberries,” Mike said, standing up and stretching. He walked over to the dresser and dug around for a moment before he threw Chester’s favorite pair of pajama pants at him. “Here, you can’t talk to him naked. I draw the line there.” He tried to make his voice light, like he was just teasing, but he definitely meant what he said. Mike could be sympathetic to the situation, but being out of earshot and having Chester naked would be unacceptable.

“Don’t worry,” Chester said, holding back his eye roll. “I have no desire to pace our bedroom, naked, while I’m on the phone. Toss me some cute underwear too,” he suggested. “And blueberries would be great. In the pancakes, that is.” 

With a flip of his wrist, Mike provided the requested underwear, not really looking at what he’d picked out. He was sure it wouldn’t be the right pair for those pants anyway. In all the months he’d been dating Chester, he’d yet to figure out the algorithm used to determine what underwear and socks went with which outfit. Clothes were clothes.

He came back around the side of the bed and kissed Chester on the top of the head. “I’ll see you downstairs. I’ll make sure there’s coffee, too.”

Chester nodded as he slipped on the underwear, and then started with the pajama pants. “Coffee. I’ll probably sneak down to get a cup.” He stood up, his body screaming for a moment as he gained his balance and let out a yawn, just as their alarm clock went off. Chester spun around and smacked it. “Guess it’s time to get up,” he said with a smirk. They really had been up early, and they didn’t even have any early morning sex to show for it.

Mike was already halfway downstairs before he realized he’d left his shirt on the bed. He almost turned around to retrieve it, but decided not to. _I don’t think they’re going to let me wear my t-shirt while I’m shooting porn. Might as well walk around without it at home and try to get used to it. Chester does it all the time._ He walked straight over to the windows and opened the shades to let the morning light come in, and resisted the urge to move away from the window. Even though he knew nobody could see him up on the sixth floor, he felt his cheeks burn for just a moment. _I can do this, I have to do this. It’s just clothes. Just skin. My skin. For everyone to see._

He shook his head and turned into the kitchen, opening cabinets and assembling his line of ingredients for pancakes. One thing he’d done since he was small was help his mother make pancakes from scratch, and it was one of the few things he felt accomplished at making in the kitchen. He pulled the honey out of the upper cabinet and looked at everything for a moment, thinking his way through the process. Blueberries didn’t get added until the end, but he needed to rinse them now and lay them out on a paper towel to dry so they didn’t ruin his batter.

As he was shaking the water off the berries and setting them aside, he heard Chester’s voice floating down from the loft. He kept his mind on the measuring and mixing of ingredients and tried not to listen for words or overhear anything they were talking about. It really didn’t involve him, and it wasn’t about work, so it was easier to convince himself not to worry. If he asked Chester what they talked about, he had to trust that Chester would tell him. 

Mike set two skillets on the stove and turned them on low to heat up, then set about making coffee. It felt strange to be in the kitchen without Chester. Usually it was the two of them together, even if Mike spent more time admiring Chester than contributing to the meal preparation. When the coffee started to drip, he turned his attention back to his skillets, prepping them with a little oil. Despite his best efforts, he always managed to burn the first pancake he made on each pan. 

From upstairs, where Chester was pacing the room, his phone to his ear as he listened to Ryan bemoan his current situation, the smell of coffee drifted up over the half-wall. Chester stopped, his nose lifting as he took a whiff. _Coffee. Yes._ He headed for the stairs. “I know,” he told Ryan as he stepped into the living room and headed for the kitchen. His eyes zeroed in on Mike, who was standing in front of the stove. Chester stopped, his eyes widening as he looked his boyfriend up and down - his shirtless boyfriend. Chester looked down at himself. He didn’t have a shirt on either, but that was par for the course. But Mike going shirtless, that was really something. _In the middle of the day. Well, morning. While he’s cooking! He’s cooking._

Chester’s stomach grumbled as he headed for the kitchen, already licking his lips and thinking about coffee as his addiction overtook everything else. He scooted behind Mike, quickly kissing his naked shoulder before he pulled a coffee cup down from the cabinet and filled it with the beautifully dark liquid. 

“I know it sucks,” he told Ryan as he sat his coffee cup down on the opposite counter and went for the milk. “But you know how Mark is. Open marriage or not I don’t -” He stopped, his lips pursing as he mumbled, “Mhm,” and poured the milk into his cup. 

Keeping his eyes on the pancakes in front of him, Mike watched the little bubbles slowly pop, waiting for the time to flip them over. He wondered what the end of the ‘open marriage’ sentence was, but didn’t want to ask while Chester was on the phone. He picked up the spatula and lifted one side of the pancake to check it. It wasn’t quite ready, so he reached for the coffee pot instead and filled his cup now that Chester had filled his own. 

“It’s just one weekend,” Chester told Ryan, even though he knew very well it was a big deal. “I wouldn’t worry about it meaning anything other than. . .well. . .” He paused for a moment as he stirred sugar into his coffee. “Maybe Mark has noticed that Jason’s not, you know, happy and this trip is like a desperate move or something.” He spun around to drop his spoon in the sink, sliding one hand over Mike’s bare back as he did, before he took his cup and headed back across the room. 

Mike sprinkled some blueberries on to the top of the pancake before he turned it, hoping he’d waited long enough, and also that he didn’t have the heat too high. The bottom of the pancake was now the top, and it was darker than he liked his, but not burnt. He’d have to see if Chester would eat them this way. _I can’t believe in all this time I’ve never made him pancakes._ Pancakes were something he usually did with Anna on Saturday mornings. Having pancakes on a Friday was sure to throw off his entire weekend.

Chester was still talking on the phone, walking a large circle through the living area and sipping from his coffee cup occasionally. Mike kept making pancakes and stacking them on two plates until there were four on each plate. He turned off the stove and hunted down the syrup, carrying the bottle with him into the living room and then waving it in front of Chester’s face. “They’re ready,” he whispered. 

Chester nodded with a grin. “Hey, Ry, I gotta go. Mike just made pancakes.” He listened while Ryan let out a sigh and agreed that he would be okay. “You’ll be fine, and Jason will be fine, too. There’s no real reason to worry. The weekend will be over before you know it,” Chester encouraged before he said goodbye, and shoved his phone into the pocket of of his black and white pajama bottoms. “They smell amazing!” he hollered joyfully as he headed for the table, where Mike had set their plates. 

“I hope you like them… it’s one of the only things I know how to make,” Mike said regretfully, shrugging one shoulder as he sat down in his place. With a deep breath, he went on. “My mom and I used to make them on Saturday mornings.” The admission, plus his lack of t-shirt, made him feel a little uncomfortable, and he really had no idea why he’d even mentioned his mom. Chester’s conversation with Ryan was more important than the fact that making pancakes always made him miss his mother.

Chester watched as Mike went quiet. As he bowed his head and stared at his plate. “I think that’s nice, Mike,” Chester said softly. He wasn’t sure how much he should say. Conversations about Mike’s parents tended to be short and usually ended with his boyfriend being upset. Chester took the syrup, and after covering every inch of every single pancake, and leaving a healthy pool of the stuff all around the bottom of his stack, he said, “I never learned how to make pancakes. I usually buy the frozen ones. You’ll have to teach me.” 

Mike looked up, a smile returning to his face as he reached for the syrup. “I can’t believe there’s something you can’t make. You’re amazing in the kitchen.” He criss-crossed a light layer of syrup on his top pancake and set the bottle down. “Are you afraid you might taste them? You probably won’t taste anything but syrup,” he teased, pointing at the massive amount of syrup on Chester’s plate. “It’s as bad as you and ketchup.” 

Chester already had a chunk of drippy pancake on his fork. “Well, that’s the point, right? It’s just like ketchup. You eat french fries for the ketchup and you eat pancakes and waffles for the syrup.” He shoved the bite in his mouth, the warmth and sharp taste from the blueberries mixed with the sweet syrup made Chester pur. “They’re good,” he offered before cutting off another bite with the side of his fork. 

A little bit of pride bubbled up in Mike’s chest. “Thanks.” They chewed in silence for a few minutes before Mike put his fork down and reached for his coffee. He took a sip, now that it had cooled a bit, and looked at his boyfriend. Chester was in condiment heaven, scooping up copious amounts of syrup with each fluffy bite of pancake. It was almost a shame to interrupt the feast, but Mike couldn’t contain his curiosity any longer. “Ryan going to be okay?” he asked, quickly taking another sip of his coffee.

Chester licked syrup off the side of his mouth before he set his fork down. He could feel the sugar rushing through his system as he reached for his coffee. “I think so,” he said, before he took a long sip to wash the syrupy taste out of his mouth. “He’s just disappointed. I guess he and Jason had made some plans for the weekend. Stuff at the YRS house, of course.” He pushed his plate to the side so he could hold his warm coffee cup in front of him on the table with both hands. “I feel for him. His last boyfriend was seeing someone else, like, cheating on him and being with Jason is. . .” He stopped, letting out a sigh. “Obviously he knows Jason and Mark are still having sex, but there’s no love there. No feelings. I think he’s just worried, you know?” 

He did know. All too well. “Yeah… that sucks.” Mike turned his chin and looked out the windows, thinking about loveless, meaningless sex, and the relationship he had with Chester. His feelings ran deep for his boyfriend, and Mike knew exactly what it felt like to love someone so completely and not feel like they were truly yours. It was the whole entire reason he was now a YRS employee. He squinted against the outside light and asked, “why do Mark and Jason even bother? If they’re in an open marriage, and they’re both unhappy, why not just end it?”

Chester looked past Mike, and into the kitchen, his eyes not really focused. “That’s a question me and Ryan have debated a lot. We think it comes down to money. Money and secrets. Jason is part owner of YRS and he knows where all the bodies are buried, so to speak.” He looked back at Mike, a hint of a smile crossing his features. “They started the open marriage thing to try and help, or at least that’s how Jason tells it. It was like a last ditch effort before divorce, and it’s been working for them. Well, until Ryan came along. You never know who’s going to show up and turn your world upside down. I should know.” He wiggled his eyebrows at Mike as he reached across the table and lightly feathered a touch to his hand. 

Mike flipped his hand over and grabbed Chester’s tightly. “You know what scares me, Ches? That someone, anyone could show up, and change everything. Like we did for each other. But what’s to stop someone else from coming along? At one point they must have been happy, right? I… I don’t know what I’d do if you ever left me. I don’t think I could take it. So in a weird, twisted way, I can understand the desperation behind going for an open marriage.” He stopped and took a breath, feeling his heart racing. “I don’t ever want that. I don’t ever want to share you again.” 

Chester was frozen. Mike’s grip was tight, and getting tighter. “Where is this coming from?” Chester asked with a hard swallow. “Mike, I love you. I thought you, I mean, don’t you believe that? I’m not going anywhere,” he insisted as he shook his head. He reached over, cupping the top of Mike’s hand, stroking it gently. “And I would never want an open marriage. That’s not me, and I know it’s not you. We agree on that.” 

“I don’t know. And I’m sorry, you know how I get sometimes. It’s the pancakes. I shouldn’t have made pancakes on a Friday. Pancakes are for Saturday, and now all I can think about is people leaving and people being hurt, and I don’t even _like_ these people you work with - we work with! - but I feel bad for them! And I don’t ever want to feel like that, I don’t ever want to lose you. You’re everything to me, Chester. I know I sound a little bit crazy right now, but all this stuff is just in my head and making me worry. We need a change of subject! Something else! Something other than open marriages and pancakes!” He stood up, shivering a little as he reached for Chester’s plate. “Are you finished? I’ll do the dishes.”

Chester wasn’t sure what to say. He’d never seen Mike freak out like that. Not to that degree. He could feel his pulse going a little fast as he rubbed his hands together. “Yeah, I’m done,” he said, his eyes flipping from his mostly eaten stack of pancakes and then back up to Mike. “I’m sorry,” he apologized. “I didn’t mean to say anything to upset you and we can make pancakes again tomorrow….on Saturday.” 

“You’re not wrong, don’t apologize, it’s fine. I’m just… I don’t know.” Mike took the plates to the sink and rinsed them off, but instead of putting them in the dishwasher the way he normally would have, he set them in the bottom of the sink and wiped his hands off on the kitchen towel. He stood with his hands braced on the corner of the sink for a minute, looking down at the plates, breathing in through his nose. He had to calm down or Chester was going to think something was really wrong. He didn’t want to talk about how he figured at some point, Chester would leave him like his parents did. He saw it all the time - people who claimed to love each other and who treated each other poorly, leaving each other behind. The thoughts were always there, poking at him in the back of his mind, even though he’d gotten better at ignoring them since he’d let Chester into his heart.

Mike wasn’t moving. He was standing at the sink, his back to Chester. _What happened? Why is he so upset? It can’t really be about pancakes. . ._ He stood up, and made his way into the kitchen. He stopped behind Mike, hesitating for a moment, until he saw his boyfriend shaking. He took the steps to close the space between them, gently wrapping his arms around Mike’s middle. “Hey,” he whispered, letting his lips fall close to his boyfriend’s pierced ear. “I love you. You don’t have to worry. I promise.” He leaned back, kissing Mike’s exposed shoulder a few times before he rested his cheek against his skin. “We can talk about it, or we don’t have to right now. But it’s going to be okay. I. . .I asked you to move in with me. We share a bed, we’re going to work together. I’ve introduced you to my mom. I told you about my dad. I’d never do all that with someone I wasn’t totally into. Totally committed to.” 

All the things Chester said Mike _knew_ were true, but hearing it all said aloud was something he needed. He hated that the morning had taken such a drastic turn from the pleasure they’d created upstairs not too long ago. “I’m sorry,” he whispered, bringing his hands down to cover Chester’s. “I know none of that had anything to do with me at all. It’s all just crap that’s in my head from my parents, that’s all. I know we don’t talk about it much, and maybe someday I’ll want to talk about it more. Right now I just want to forget it.” He twisted around in Chester’s arms and snuggled his face between Chester’s shoulder and neck. “I love you, too. So much, babe. I’m sorry I freaked out.” 

Chester embraced him, holding him tightly. “We all freak out sometimes,” he offered kissing the side of Mike’s head, his lips getting lost in his blue hair. “And anytime you want to talk, I’m always ready to listen.” 

They stood for a moment, and Chester let his hands run up and down Mike’s back. “If it helps, I think you cooking pancakes while shirtless is one of the sexiest things ever.” 

Mike’s lips curled into a smile against Chester’s skin. “Yeah? Sexy? You’re right. Shirtless cooking _is_ sexy. I love watching you cook.” 

“And I love knowing you’re watching me,” Chester said with a grin. “You need to cook more often so I can use you as eye-candy. And maybe,” he added with a sly flip in his voice, “one day you’ll cook naked for me.” 

“Mmhm… naked, huh? Sounds like something you’ve given some thought to. A little fantasy?” Mike lifted his head and looked at his boyfriend. “Naked cooking sounds dangerous. The only thing I know how to make is pancakes. Not sure I want to have my naked parts around the stove.”

Chester dropped his eyes to the floor. “Actually, in my fantasy you’re making meatloaf. With lots of ketchup. Naked.” He looked up, holding back his smile. “You can’t judge,” he stated immediately. “It’s a fantasy, so no limits.” 

MIke laughed, unable to hold it in. “Your fantasy _would_ include ketchup, Ches,” he said, trying to imagine a world where his boyfriend didn’t smear ketchup on everything. “I guess I should be glad you aren’t putting the ketchup on me.”

Chester’s face twisted. “Oh, no. That would just be wrong,” he denied quickly. “I’m really not one for food getting involved with the love making. It’s just messy and a waste of good stuff!” He dropped his hands lower on Mike’s back, teasing over the top of his pajama bottoms. “I’ve, a, I’ve got one more I’ve been thinking about, if you want to hear it.” 

“Oh yeah?” Mike raised an eyebrow, his thoughts tumbling through his own stash of fantasies. “Maybe this is a conversation to take out of the kitchen.”

“Why? I like the kitchen.” 

Mike put his lips next to Chester’s ear and said, “because if it’s something I like, maybe I’ll do it. And I don’t think whatever is in that head of yours involves the kitchen sink.” He dragged his lips over Chester’s cheek and pulled back to look into his eyes. 

Chester was caught in Mike’s deep stare. “Okay,” he said, his mind racing. The idea that what they were talking about - fantasies that had always remained just that - might actually happen in real life, had Chester on stunned mode as Mike took him by the hand and led him across the loft to the couch. They sat down, both of them turned to face one another as Mike offered for Chester to continue. 

“Well,” Chester said, his fingers picking at the fabric of the couch, “I’m not sure how you’d feel about this, but after what happened this morning, I’m hoping maybe you’ll be into it. Or at least into trying.” He stopped for a moment, gathering some sort of word order in his mind. “We’ve always had a certain routine in the bedroom. I’ve always been on top,” he said, pressing his fingers to his chest. “But what would you think about us switching that around now and again and you could be on top?” It sounded awkward, and Chester was already cursing himself for even asking. If Mike had any desire to be a top, he would have said so long before now. Chester’s throat was dry, and he was getting ready to take it all back. To tell Mike not to worry about it, that he loved how they did things now and it was just silly ideas that meant nothing. 

Mike bit down on his bottom lip to keep himself from smiling. He’d be lying if he told Chester he hadn’t thought about it a time or two, but Mike was a creature of habit, and he was comfortable with the way things were between them and uncertain of what it would be like to top. Here was Chester, offering the opportunity up without him even having to say anything. “I’ve thought about it before,” he confessed, his concentration on Chester’s knees. “I just… I don’t know, I guess I just thought it would always be this way. I didn’t know that changing it up was even a thing.” He felt his cheeks flush in embarrassment. “You know you’re my only… I figured you knew what you wanted.” 

Chester reached over and put his hand on Mike’s knee, squeezing it. “We can do whatever we want, Mike. There’s no rules. Just the ones we set. And I love the way we do things, but sometimes it’s fun to change those things up, as long as we’re both comfortable with it. But, so you’ve really thought about it?” he asked, a faint heat drifting over his cheeks. “In a good way?” 

Mike nodded. “Yeah, I have. But… I don’t have the first fucking clue what I’m doing.” He laughed under his breath. “I don’t want to hurt you with my inexperience.” 

Chester shook his head as he waved his hand through the air. “Eh, there’s nothing to it,” he assured his lover. “It’s all about communication, and _we_ communicate really well in the bedroom. So if the mood ever hits you, just let me know.” He offered a quick smile before he said, “What about you? You got any fantasies. . .about us?” 

There were a few floating about in Mike’s head, and he thought it over for a moment. “Well, yeah, I’ve got one.” He reached over and took Chester’s hand and pulled his arm out straight between them. Mike watched Chester’s face as he circled his wrist with his thumb and fingers. “I, uh… think it would be fun to be tied up. Restrained a little,” he said breathlessly, waiting for Chester’s reaction. He squeezed his fingers around Chester’s wrist. 

“Sexy Boy,” Chester said, his mind already racing forward with a hint of excitement. “We can do that. They make these things called Fuzzy Cuffs. They’ve got padding around the wrist restraint part of the handcuff so they won’t hurt. They’re made for bedroom play. We can get a pair, if you want.” 

Mike caught Chester’s other wrist between his fingers, and then pulled his boyfriend’s arms out to the side and over his head a little. “Like this,” he said, demonstrating what he wanted. “We’d need two sets.”

Chester couldn’t stop staring into Mike’s face. The sudden show of force as he held Chester’s arms over his head was a turn on, and Chester felt his cock twitch. “Okay,” he said, his voice a little labored. “We’ll get two. We can go pick them out together. Any kind you want.” He went to lean forward, to grab a kiss from Mike’s lips, but his boyfriend kept him pinned where he was. 

“Nah, you don’t get to call the shots,” Mike teased, his voice a little husky. “Not if you’re the one tied up.” He slowly brought Chester’s arms down and slid his hands up his boyfriend’s arms, wrapping them both around his neck and then bringing their faces close together. “But I don’t want to restrain you first, that’s my fantasy. I want you to do it to me.” He closed the last inch between them and kissed Chester deeply, making his desire known - even though they didn’t have cuffs at the moment, Mike was ready. Now they had all weekend to make it happen.

****  
TBC


	24. Bottom to Top

Chester stepped in first, his arms aching a bit from the bags he was carrying. “Got the door?” he called over his shoulder as he headed right for the kitchen. After discussing their fantasies that morning, the couple had decided to make good on them. With only a few minutes worth of planning, they had headed out to the adult novelty and bookstore. It hadn’t taken long, and they’d found two pairs of zebra printed fuzzy cuffs, a blindfold that matched, and a black leather collar that had bulleted 3/4 inch spikes on it. It had caught Chester’s eye first, but it had been Mike who had insisted they add it to their bounty. 

The grocery store had been next, as Chester insisted that they were going to have meatloaf for dinner. Even though Mike wasn’t ready to cook naked in the kitchen yet, Chester was craving the ketchup covered dish, and he was happy to share it with his boyfriend before they headed to the bedroom to tackle other fantasies. 

“I hope you’re hungry,” Chester said as he started to unpack the grocery sacks. “Not to brag, but I make a killer meatloaf, even for lunch.” 

“That’s not surprising,” Mike answered, dropping his bag onto the table. “And I’m always hungry. Do you know me at all?” He tossed a smile at his boyfriend and poked around in the bag. It was true he was hungry, but the contents of the bag looked tempting. He hated waiting.

“You’re right. What was I thinking?” Chester said in jest as he started to hum and move around his kitchen as he unpacked what they’d bought. He turned on the oven before he spun around to see Mike looking through the bag at what they’d gotten from the _other_ store. “You still up for all that?” he asked, nodding his chin toward the dining table. 

Mike reached in the bag and ran his fingers across one of the fuzzy cuffs. “Yeah,” he said immediately, “I’m totally up for all this. All of it. Collar included. Of course, that’s for you.” He looked at Chester again with a smirk. “Not sure how that ties in to you restraining me, but I don’t care. This is gonna look so sexy on you.” He pulled the collar out of the bag and held it up. “I think I might just put this on you now.” 

Chester stopped what he was doing, his eyes zeroing in on the spiked collar he hadn’t looked at since they’d bought it. He raised his eyebrows at his boyfriend’s devious expression as he dangled it out in front of him. “Maybe you should,” Chester said, stepping away from the counter and rounding the peninsula. He waited a moment, locking eyes with Mike before he spun around. “Go ahead,” he offered, holding back his grin, “buckle it on.” 

He didn’t have to be asked twice. Mike unbuckled the collar and lifted it up and over Chester’s head, bringing it back down into place and fastening it quickly. He let his fingers run along the edge, feeling Chester’s warm skin before he leaned in and kissed his neck right above the collar and below the hairline. “Turn around and let me see,” he murmured, already forgetting about the meatloaf Chester was supposed to be making.

Chester’s fingers went to his throat as he felt over the leather and the spikes. It was a little snug, but not uncomfortable. He turned around. “Well? Does it look good or just weird?” 

“It looks fuckin’ good,” Mike said, reaching to hook a finger over it and gently tug Chester closer to him. “You can wear anything and make it look good. Or nothing. Either way, you always look delicious.” He could feel his body already reacting to the simple sight of the collar on Chester’s neck, and he stepped to put one foot between Chester’s feet, nudging his way close and aligning their bodies. With another soft tug, he brought their lips together in a sloppy, wet kiss. 

Mike sucked on Chester’s bottom lip and played his tongue over the lip ring there, feeling fired up and ready to go. They’d already had to stop once in the morning, and he didn’t want to stop again, even for meatloaf. He liked the way it felt to slide his finger along the inside of the collar, the smooth leather on one side and Chester’s warm skin on the other. His mind was already creating scenarios where it would be appropriate for his boyfriend to wear this collar in the outside world. With a soft pop he let go of their kiss and whispered, “this is fuckin’ sexy.”

Chester slid his hands around Mike’s waist, his face glowing. “Yeah?” he asked sheepishly before he pulled Mike a little more up against himself. He took his lips, smoothing his tongue over Mike’s and he heard his boyfriend moan, low and deep. Bursts of excited energy were already making their way through Chester’s legs and up to his cock. He shoved his hands up under Mike’s t-shirt, grabbing at his skin as he pushed their kiss a fierce step further. He knew meatloaf was waiting to be made, but right now ravishing Mike was more fun. Their morning had started off in a whirlwind of hormones and need, and they’d yet to get back to what they’d started. 

Neither of them wanted to let up on the kiss, and Mike was ready for more. Reluctantly he let go of the collar to grab Chester’s hips in both hands, turning him toward the table and backing him up slowly, one step at a time. He felt the moment Chester’s ass hit the furniture and he reached to lift his boyfriend up and deposit him on top, sliding Chester’s legs around his waist and pushing their cocks together. The friction was perfect, and after a moment Mike decided to just lean Chester back over the table, kissing down his neck until he could no longer reach him, guiding him down the rest of the way with his hands. He ran his hands down Chester’s sides, stopping at his belt and looking up. Mike was ready to undress him right there on the kitchen table. 

Chester could feel Mike’s hands playing around with his belt, but that’s all they were doing. Playing. He lifted his head to see his boyfriend’s big brown eyes staring at him in that way he always did when he silently asked permission for something. “You didn’t have to stop,” Chester said, a heavy pant at the end of his sentence. His jeans were feeling tight, and the idea of getting them off quickly was the main thing crossing his mind. He bucked his hips playfully, bumping Mike’s hand. 

“You sure?” Mike asked, his voice coming out a little rough. “I know we’re supposed to be cooking or something. Or you are.” He pressed his hand to Chester’s erection and watched his boyfriend’s eyes squeeze close, his lips part in a silent gasp of air. It looked like an invitation to continue, and Mike continued to rub his hand along Chester’s length while he pulled the end of his belt out of the buckle, ready to get rid of it altogether. 

Chester’s eyes were shut, his body loving the attention. He and Mike had been together long enough that the other man knew exactly what to do. He knew where and how to touch, suck, and thrust. Chester was already feeling a wet spot on the front of his underwear, his dick way past leaking as Mike tugged at his belt. And then a few seconds later, the oven timer buzzed - it was preheated. 

The sound jerked Chester back to reality as he opened his eyes and stared at the dangling industrial looking light fixture over his head. His back and right shoulder blade pinched a little as his thoughts left the high place they’d been and crashed back to meatloaf and what they were supposed to be doing later. “Wait,” he said suddenly, lifting his head, his hand going out to stop Mike from progressing even more. “Sexy Boy, wait,” he said again before he slowly sat up, putting his weight on his elbows. “If we do this now, I won’t have as much to give you later,” he said, hoping not to send the wrong message. “I mean, I’ll be up for _activities_ later, but if we wait, it will be better.” 

Mike sucked in a deep breath through his nose. He knew what Chester meant, no clarification needed, but it was thoughtful of him to make sure they were on the same page. “I know,” he groaned, fighting the urge to pick Chester up and take him straight upstairs. “I can’t help myself, you look so fuckin’ hot and I’m so horny,” he whined, reaching his hand to help pull Chester up from the table. “I don’t know if I’ll make it all the way through dinner.” Mike turned his very best pout, his very best puppy eyes onto his boyfriend. “It’s your fault, you know.” 

Chester reached out, sliding his hand down Mike’s face before he looped both his arms around his neck. “You’re so amazing,” he whispered, leaning their foreheads together. “You know what I love about you? I mean, the list is kinda endless, but one of those things is that you have these moments of openly saying exactly what you’re thinking. Or feeling,” he added with a shrug. “Whatever. It’s raw honesty, and it’s awesome.” He tilted his head so he could give his lover a soft kiss, his fingers running up the back of Mike’s neck and ruffling through his blue styled hair. “I’ll give you the choice, Sexy Boy,” he said as they pulled apart. “I can get off this table and make us some kickass meatloaf before we go upstairs or I can get off this table and go handcuff you to our bed right now.” 

It was that moment that Mike’s stomach decided to rumble, and he couldn’t help but laugh. “Doesn’t sound like it’s my choice,” he said, reaching out to touch the collar around Chester’s neck one more time. “My body says food first, for whatever reason. I guess I just want to torture myself a little longer, watching you make this meatloaf… I don’t know if I’ll be able to stay out of your way. Don’t be upset if I’m in there interrupting you.” He nodded toward the kitchen. “I’ll try my best not to get you naked in there.” 

Chester let out a little laugh. “That sounds like a challenge. Okay,” he said resolutely. “I’m going to go make us some kickass meatloaf. And potatoes. And corn on the cob. . .with lots of butter,” he hummed, licking his lips, his eyes drifting off into the world of food inside his head. He was already stepping it out in his mind, each thing he needed to do and in what order as he kissed Mike on his cheek, and slowly slid himself off the table, his sneakers hitting the polished cement floor. 

He headed for the kitchen. He grabbed a mixing bowl and two big pots from the lower cabinets. “Mike? Why don’t you take those other things upstairs,” he suggested as he pointed toward the black plastic bag that still contained the fuzzy cuffs and blindfold, which had been shoved off the table during their mini makeout session. 

“Anything to clear the way for food.” Mike scooped the bag off the floor and headed for the stairs. The bag was light, the cuffs and blindfold not weighing much. When he stepped into the loft, his eyes went straight to the bed, his sanctuary with Chester. They’d spent a lot of time in their bed together, and Mike was excited to see how his fantasy would play out later. _If Chester hadn’t admitted his to me, I don’t think I’d have ever brought this up. And now we’re going to try it out. I love that he didn’t even ask questions, he was just ready to go as soon as I mentioned it. I may have to mention other things someday._

He opened the bag and tossed the handcuffs on the bed, but kept the blindfold. With a quick look toward the stairs, he held it up over his eyes to see how dark it would be. A little sliver of light came in around his nose, but he couldn’t see much. It seemed like it would be fun. He balled up the plastic bag and left the blindfold on the bed before he went back downstairs. 

Chester’s kitchen was going. He had his potatoes on, his oven was ready to take the meatloaf he was just forming into the pan, the smell of garlic, onions, and breadcrumbs hitting is nose. His stomach rumbled, and he knew Mike had made the right decision. Nothing kills a good sexy moment like a loud stomach. He patted his meat mixture over the top, like it was modeling clay, until he was happy with the result. He spun around to wash his hands. “Probably going to be about an hour, maybe less,” Chester said, catching a glimpse of Mike out of the corner of his eye. “But the wait will be worth it.” 

“And _that’s_ the problem with meatloaf,” Mike grumbled as he made his way to the bar and leaned against it. “I need a snack.” He eyed the kitchen, wondering if he should go in there and find something or just stay out of the way. After a moment’s pause, he shrugged. “I guess I could go practice instead of ruining my appetite. Would it bother you if I played for a bit while you cook?”

Chester turned around as he dried off his hands with the dish towel. “By all means, go play. I love having music on while I’m cooking.” He stopped for a minute, a hint of excitement crossing his features. “And now I can have live music!” He tossed the dish towel onto the counter before he strolled over to Mike and slung an arm around around his middle, kissing his face. “Do you take requests?” 

“Well, you have to let me get my actual practice done first, the boring part. But then I’ll play anything you want, babe.” Mike closed his eyes and let Chester continue holding him, afraid to do anything or they’d end up on the kitchen table again. “What do you want to hear?”

“I don’t know,” Chester admitted before he let his boyfriend go and headed back to the kitchen. “I was just asking. Go ahead and do what you need to do. If I think of something, I’ll let you know.” He picked up his meatloaf pan and shoved it in the oven. He let out a long breath, feathering his fingers over his red-tipped mohawk as he thought before he headed back to the refrigerator. He gathered his next ingredients and set them off to the side before he started cleaning up the counter space from the meatloaf prep. 

Mike shook his head in amusement and walked over to the keyboard they had made space for underneath the painting he’d made. _Maybe one day we could get a real upright piano, like Chester said. It will be easier now that I’ll be making more money._ Mike sat down and almost absentmindedly played through all forty-eight major scales and minor equivalents, along with his chord progressions. He opened one of his books and worked through some technical studies, and then worked on a piece he’d been learning for the auditions he was hoping to take soon. 

Going to college was more of a reality now than it had ever been, and there was now an urgency to learn the pieces he wanted to use for his auditions where there had never been a particular goal in mind before. Lost in his own world, he was slowly figuring out the best fingering for a technical passage when the buzzer on the oven jarred him back into reality. “Ches? It’s already been an hour?” he called into the kitchen, his eyes on his sheet music.

Chester was pulling his steaming meatloaf from the oven. “Yes!” he hollered back, barely looking over his shoulder as his greedy eyes ate up the food in front of him instead. “But keep playing! It’s not done yet!” He grabbed the bottle of ketchup, and dumped as much of the red stuff as he could over the top, licking his lips. He took a butterknife and spread it around, making sure it was even over every inch and corner. He popped it back in the oven, and set a new timer. 

He looked across the loft; Mike was still sitting at the keyboard, staring at his music. “The ketchup has to get good and sticky,” he said, before he glanced over his shoulder, eyeing his corn that needed to come out of the water shortly. His potatoes were already done, whipped with butter, parsley, onions, and cream cheese. They were already off the stove and sitting in a covered bowl off to the side of the stove where they’d stay warm till they were ready to eat. 

Without further thought, he pulled his oven mitts off and headed across the apartment. Mike’s back was to him and the closer he got, the more the urge to be close hit him. He stepped up behind his boyfriend and leaned down, lacing his arms around Mike’s middle. “It sounds good,” he said, pressing the side of his face to Mike’s. “I can see why people brought their kids to you for lessons.” 

“Thanks… I still have a lot of work to do on this one, but I’ll get it. It’s the last movement of the sonata and then I’ll have all of my audition repertoire ready to go. Maybe I’ll go ahead and try to get some classes in, like we were talking about.” He turned to kiss Chester’s cheek, breathing in the scent of dinner at the same time. “Dinner smells amazing. Glad I had something to keep my mind off how hungry I am! I might eat the whole thing.” He tapped his hands over Chester’s, signaling for his boyfriend to let him go before he stood up, closing his sheet music and putting it back in a black folder.

“Hopefully it will taste amazing, too,” Chester said as he turned to head back to the kitchen. “And I’m excited for you. I think it’s great you’re going to try and get into college. Or, I mean, you do have to pass a test to get in, right?” he stopped, waiting to pull his corn off the stove until Mike had joined him in the kitchen so they could talk properly while he finished dinner. 

“Yeah. I have to audition. It’s like a test, on the piano. There’s a whole list of things I have to be able to play before they will even consider me. My grades were good in high school, and my ACT scores were high enough, but if I’m going to be a performance major, especially on piano, I have to meet all the skill requirements too.” Mike watched Chester finish their dinner, a warm feeling of contentment sliding over him. 

He felt so much better than he had earlier in the day, when he’d freaked out over a different meal. He knew Chester was right. They were both invested in the relationship, and in helping each other with their future goals. Chester would support his performance dreams and Mike would help Chester with paying off his mother’s debts until they could both be free of YRS and Chester could decide what he really wanted to do with his life. Even if it was hard, Mike knew he had to continue to trust his boyfriend and believe in their commitment to each other.

“Do you need me to help do anything?” he asked, watching Chester fuss with the corn. “Want me to get drinks?”

Chester nodded. “Drinks would be good. I’m going to make our plates in just a minute.” He was stacking corn onto a platter. He’d smother them in butter, salt and pepper before he’d dish out their portions. He opened the oven, and peeked at his meatloaf; it would be done in just another couple of minutes. 

He watched as Mike searched through the refrigerator. “Tea,” Chester said as he took plates down from the cabinets. “Do we have any raspberry tea left?” Mike nodded and Chester went back to plating their food. He wanted the meal to look nice. To look professional. He knew Mike didn’t expect so much, but it felt important to Chester. _It’s one thing I can do well. One thing that isn’t porn. That isn’t animalistic._ He let out a sigh, his mood suddenly dropping. _Mike’s so talented. His art, his music. He’s going to get into that college and then he’ll have that too. And he’ll deserve it. At least I get to feed him. At the table and in the bedroom._ The faint ghost of a smile tugged at Chester’s lips as he spooned potatoes onto their plates. _I’m so lucky to have him. Most people don’t give a damn after they get what they want. But he’s different._

For a moment Chester stopped, mid scoop with the spoon of potatoes in the air, right over Mike’s plate. “I know you’re going to do really well,” he said, before he plopped the potatoes into their place. “On that piano test. You’ll pass and then you’ll get that degree you want. I just know you will. It’s going to be great.” He left the potatoes, and pulled on his lobster oven mitts to give the meatloaf one last check before he pulled it out, the smell of hot ketchup tickling every neuron in his body. 

“God, that smells good,” Mike chirped, his mood lifted with thoughts of delicious food. He took another deep breath as he poured the raspberry tea Chester wanted and a glass of water for himself. “You’re my favorite chef,” he called over to Chester, walking to the table and putting their glasses down. “Maybe when I’m taking my classes you should go to culinary school.”

Chester stopped for a moment, his eyes flipping up from the plates to his boyfriend. “Yeah, right,” he dismissed. He turned around, double checking that he’d turned off the burners and the stove before he took their plates and met Mike at the table. “And I’m not as good as Brad. He actually went to culinary school. Not that it’s done him any good,” he muttered under his breath. “Don’t get me wrong, I love the man’s cooking, but I know he’s not happy. He went and spent all the money and did all the work and he’s still miserable.” He sat down with a bit of a huff before he whispered a quick ‘sorry’. “I don’t want to bring the mood down, let’s just eat.” 

MIke frowned for a second before he reached over and grabbed Chester’s hand. “I’m pretty sure you could do anything you set your mind to, Ches. I’m all about keeping the mood going, too, but… I don’t know, don’t you ever think about what you want to do when you’re finished at YRS? You have to have some dream, something that you want after- well, afterwards. I don’t think I’ll ever get to play professionally, either, but that’s my dream, you know?” He ducked his head to look into Chester’s eyes, eyes he was trying to shield from Mike’s stare. “I’m not saying that you love cooking the way I love piano, but you _are_ awesome at it. I was just thinking out loud.”

Chester kept his eyes down, focused on the steaming food on his plate. Cooking professionally was never something he’d ever really considered. That meant school, and he was lousy at school. “Thanks, Mike,” he said as he looked up. “I appreciate it, I really do. But it’s not for me. Besides, school costs money and my money is pretty tied up for the next few years. And, I don’t know,” he said with a shrug as he finally took his fork and sliced into his ketchup drowned meatloaf, “I was actually thinking of maybe staying with YRS. Not as a model,” he made sure to say right away, “but maybe working the cameras. Jason’s been showing me how. It’s interesting.” 

“Oh.” Mike squeezed Chester’s hand before he let go to pick up his fork and poke into his meatloaf. “I didn’t realize you were working that side of the camera. That’s nice,” he said, giving Chester a brief smile. “I just want you to be happy. There’s things about YRS that I’m not sure about long term, but maybe it’s different if you’re shooting. Either way, I didn’t mean to make the conversation so heavy.” 

Mike took a bite of meatloaf, keeping his eyes on Chester’s expression as he chewed. _I hope I haven’t ruined the mood. I don’t particularly like the idea of him staying at YRS, but I think I answered him okay. We can always talk about that later. He’s just so good about wanting me to do what makes me happy, I want the same thing for him._ He swallowed and immediately went for another bite. “This is so good, Ches. I’ll even admit you’re right about the ketchup, this time.” 

“Ketchup makes everything better,” Chester replied immediately before stuffing another forkfull in his mouth. He could tell Mike wasn’t thrilled about his idea of staying at YRS, but he also wasn’t surprised by it. He swallowed down his food and took a gulp of tea before he said, “But nothing’s set in stone. I mean, at YRS. Once my contract is up, who knows where I’ll go or what I’ll do. Mom’s debt will be paid and she’ll be all set up, so I don’t know.” He looked away from Mike, over his shoulder and into the kitchen. _The moment I quit YRS, we’ll have to move out of this place. I can’t quit til we get that part sorted._ The thought of moving out of the loft sent a sad wave over Chester’s mind, but he pushed it away. 

_Fuck it. Not today. All that stuff is two years away._ He smiled as he looked back at Mike. “So, Sexy Boy, tell me what you’re thinking. . .do you want to be handcuffed on your back or on your stomach?” 

There was a forkful of ketchupy meatloaf halfway to Mike’s mouth, but he didn’t even hesitate to answer, “stomach.” He quirked an eyebrow at Chester and his rapid subject change before he took the bite.

Chester tapped his fork against his lip ring, his eyes up to the ceiling and toward the bedroom. “Really?” he asked, his voice taking a devious twist. “I think _that_ would be fun.” He held back a little smirk before going back to his food, stabbing a few potatoes all at once and swallowing them down. The faster they ate, the sooner they could move on to other things. He took a chunk of meatloaf next, and mixed it with potato as he envisioned how their first steps into handcuffs and blindfolds would go. He laced a stray finger over the spiked collar he still had on. He tugged at it for a second before he pressed a fingertip to one of the spikes, his mind far off. 

Mike could tell Chester was thinking about other things as they continued to eat in silence. He wanted to nudge him and ask for his thoughts, but decided the rest of the day would be a lot more fun if he decided to just be patient and let his lover plot out what would be happening in their bedroom shortly. Just the thought of the fuzzy cuffs upstairs brought another smile to his face. He couldn’t finish his food fast enough. 

Between chewing and stray comments about their earlier trip out, the couple finished quickly. Chester was using his last couple of potatoes to scoop every little bit of leftover ketchup on his plate before he sat his fork down. “I’m stuffed,” he announced, rubbing his flat belly. “Just stick a fork in me.” 

“You’re like a turkey,” Mike teased, pushing his chair back and lifting his plate, then reaching for Chester’s. “I’m stuffed too. I don’t know if I can lay on my stomach right now. How did you let me eat so much?” 

“I was kinda busy,” Chester laughed as he stood up. “But you’ll be fine. And handcuffs will work just as well on your back. Give your tummy a break,” he teased as he headed into the kitchen where Mike was standing at the sink, rinsing their dishes. Chester slid behind him, putting his hands on his boyfriend’s hips. He lightly kissed the nape of his neck. “You smell like ketchup,” he said, before he licked his tongue from the base of Mike’s neck, all the way up to his hairline. 

Even though he was being compared to ketchup, Mike couldn’t help but lean his body back into Chester, closing his eyes as his wet tongue tasted his skin. “Do I taste like ketchup too?” he asked, mostly joking, but also somewhat curious. He loved everything Chester was doing so far, which was just that one lick, but he knew it would lead to more.

Chester’s tongue slid around the side of Mike’s neck before he tilted his head and teased one of Mike’s gold hoop earrings with it. “I’m not sure. Either you do, or my taste buds have officially overdosed on ketchup.” He smiled briefly before he swirled his tongue to the back of Mike’s earlobe, pressing it right to the spot he knew Mike’s body loved. 

Mike felt his knees go weak as Chester continued to tease him, and he cracked his eyes open, setting down the rinsed plate in his hand and reaching for a hand towel. “Mmmm, Ches, you’re gonna make me break a plate or something. Hang on,” he breathed, drying his hands off and tossing the towel away. He braced his hands on the edge of the counter and tilted his head back again, letting his boyfriend tease his favorite spot for a few more seconds. The feel of Chester’s tongue on that sensitive patch of skin had his dick reacting immediately. There had been a lot of teasing in the past few hours and Mike was ready to move the whole business upstairs- finally.

Turning around meant losing the contact of Chester’s lips and tongue, and Mike sighed with impatience as he grabbed onto his boyfriend and pulled him close. Chester was already smiling before he managed to say, “why don’t we go upstairs? I’m ready to get naked.” 

Chester leaned his head close, slapping a wet kiss to Mike’s cheek. “Perfect,” he stated, his eyes glistening under the lights. “Go on up, I gotta piss first and do a little clean up in here. Ten minutes, Sexy Boy. Ten minutes and I’ll be up the stairs and ready to go.” 

“Ten minutes?” Mike whined. “Ten? C’mon, babe, it’s been like… hours since we woke up.” He poked Chester in the stomach with one finger. “You’re doing this on purpose. Trying to make me crazy, aren’t you?” 

“Please,” Chester said with a short laugh. “This isn’t torture. Go upstairs,” he encouraged again, running his hand down Mike’s arm. “Get on the bed. Get comfortable, and I’ll be there before you know it. And don’t get too naked,” he instructed playfully, tugging on Mike’s shirt sleeve. “I want to strip you a little while you’ve got that blindfold on.” He squeezed Mike’s arm quickly before he announced he _really_ had to pee, cursing the raspberry tea, and then he was gone, into the bathroom. 

For a moment Mike stood in the kitchen, feeling a little frustrated. Then he just shrugged and started toward the stairs. It was clear that Chester had some sort of plan, and keeping him impatiently wanting more was probably part of it. He tugged his t-shirt off as he stepped into the loft, dropping it on the floor next to his side of the bed as he sat down, then rolled over onto his back. _Doesn’t make sense to have a shirt on before he handcuffs me, but I’ll leave the rest on. For whatever reason._ He turned his head and looked at the cuffs and the blindfold, waiting there on the bed for their moment. He could hear Chester come out of the bathroom downstairs, and the rustling of his movements, but no clues as to what he was doing. While he waited on his boyfriend, he stretched his arms over his head and thought about what it would feel like to stay that way while Chester did as he pleased to him. 

Downstairs, Chester was rinsing dishes - his pots and pans - before shoving as many that would fit into the dishwasher. He was way past ready to run upstairs and jump on his boyfriend, but crusty food stuck to his favorite cookware would bother him. _It’s better to take care of it now and then I won’t worry over it._

The last pot landed in the dishwasher, and after washing his hands, Chester practically bolted for the stairs. “On my way!” he hollered as he took them two at a time. He stopped right at the doorway of the open bedroom, staring at Mike’s naked chest, and how he already had his hand over his head. “Practicing?” he asked with a sly smirk. 

“Maybe,” Mike admitted, lowering his arms and feeling a faint flush come over his body. “I was just trying to follow directions while I waited for you. Ten minutes felt like forever!” He knew he was being dramatic, but it didn’t matter. Chester was used to his drama by now. 

“You should legally change your middle name to ‘impatient’,” Chester laughed as he rounded the bed, to stand at the end. He rubbed his chin, inspecting Mike’s blue jeans and belt and bare feet. “Before we start, this is _your_ fantasy. Got any special requests? Other than the handcuffs and the blindfold, of course.” 

Mike’s teeth came out to grab his bottom lip as he thought about what to say. True, it was his fantasy, but part of the whole appeal of being restrained was relinquishing all the control to his partner. He wasn’t sure how much he wanted to explore that whole side of things this first time, though, so he decided to just keep it light. “Um, well… I just was thinking about how I really wouldn’t be in any position to make decisions… I don’t want to think. I just want you to take charge. But not in an aggressive way, I don’t think… I think just more of the element of surprise, since I can’t see you.” Mike shook his head, his mind all a mess. “I don’t know how to explain what I want. I want to _want_ to touch you, but I can’t. I mean, I guess I’m trying to say, as much as I complain about it… I kind of like the teasing.” He rolled his eyes at himself and bit his lip again, waiting for Chester’s reaction.

“You got it,” Chester said, without any hesitation or follow up questions. He crawled onto the bottom of the bed, snatching the fuzzy cuffs as he did. “Lay back,” he said, as he crawled forward, straddling Mike’s lap. He looked down, catching the excited glint in his boyfriend’s dark eyes, but he refrained from kissing him. There was going to be lots of that very shortly. 

He took Mike’s wrist, and snapped one of the cuffs on. He tugged on it, lifting Mike’s arm. “That feel okay?” 

“Yeah, it’s not too tight,” Mike answered, twisting his wrist a little so that the cuff moved a bit. “It’s good.”

Chester kept his mouth shut as he took the other end of the cuff, and leaning forward he snapped it onto one of the horizontal iron rails, which made up his headboard, a feature that was typically hidden by all the pillows. He glanced down at Mike before he took his other wrist and did the same. “There,” he said, as he moved, leaving Mike on the bed alone. “What do you think?” 

There was something exciting and a little bit scary about being cuffed to the bed, even if it was Chester who had put him there. Mike tugged a bit of the cuffs, just to see how much he could move his arms. It wasn’t much. He felt the thrill of the unknown zip across his body. This was going to be fun. “I like it,” he answered softly, his breaths already a little bit heavier and faster than they were before Chester had gotten started. 

From the foot of the bed, Chester picked up the zebra printed blindfold. He held it up, watching as Mike’s dark eyes followed it. “I think this needs to wait,” he said, twirling it around his finger before he tossed it back on the bed. “First, I need to ditch some of these clothes. I feel a bit overdressed for this adventure.” 

He lightly swung his hips - right, then left - as he grabbed the hem of his t-shirt and slowly started to pull it up and over his head. Even now he could feel Mike’s eyes on him as he spun halfway around, and arched his back, his arms in the air as he stretched before he dropped his shirt to the floor. 

He fumbled with his mohawk for a moment, making sure it was still in place, still looking sexy, before both his hands went to the spiked collar around his neck. “You know I think I’ll keep this on,” he decided as he tugged at it, opening his mouth and letting out a dramatic breath as he did. He watched as Mike’s lips parted and his eyes glistened with lust. 

Chester tossed him a sensual smile before he dropped his hands to his waist. His fingers teased his own belt as he licked his lips, letting his tongue slide over his piercing. “But this belt is pretty tight. Should I take it off?” 

Mike bit down on his bottom lip as he watched, nodding his head. “Yeah. Yeah, Ches… take it off.” He couldn’t move his eyes away from his boyfriend, and he couldn’t move his hands to help. Not being able to participate made his mouth water in anticipation as he waited to see what Chester would do for him and to him. 

Without a word, Chester undid his buckle, and pulled his belt from the loops of his jeans. He folded it in half, his hands squeezing it before he walked it over to the dresser and set it down. “Now my pants just won’t stay up,” he said, turning back toward the bed and sticking his bottom lip out, his piercing looking dramatic. “I could probably dance my way right out of them.” He lifted his arms, his flame tattoos showing off brilliantly as he started to move them back and forth while he jiggled his hips, reminiscent of a hula dancer. He took little steps back toward the bottom of the bed, and by the time he got there, his jeans were sagging off his hips. The waistband of his underwear was showing. He turned around, his back to the bed. “Guess I have to help them,” he said, glancing over his shoulder at Mike’s open mouth before he bent over, purposely lifting his ass high in the air as he slid his denims down, and off. 

“You’re such a tease,” Mike said breathlessly, craning his neck to see what Chester was doing. “I wish… I wish I could grab that ass,” he thought aloud, startling himself when the words came out of his mouth. Words that were meant to exist in his thoughts. He could feel the twitch of his cock coming to life as he watched Chester shed his clothes, and he pulled his arms just a little against the cuffs. Just enough to remind him they were there. 

“I think you should do something about these,” he murmured, glancing down at his jeans and lifting his hips slightly. “I can’t help it, Ches, I’m so impatient. It’s been a long day.” Mike tried to look appealing as he practically begged Chester to hurry things along.

Chester stood himself up straight, and turned around to face his lover. He was only in his underwear now, and his hand was already on his front, enticing his dick to stiffen as he rubbed himself. “Impatient people shouldn’t ask to be handcuffed,” he said, a smirk on his face. “You’re not in charge.” He took a step closer to the bed, pulling at his cock over top his underwear. He could feel his body getting worked up; the tingles had already started in his thighs and moving toward his balls and shaft. He let out a closed mouth moan before he quickly shed his underwear. 

He licked his palm, making sure to leave enough spit on it to play as lubricant before he grabbed himself again, sliding his hand up and down his own length. He inched closer until his knees hit the bottom of the bed. “I’m feeling pretty good, Sexy Boy,” he said, his free hand reaching for one of Mike’s bare feet. He slid his fingers down the top of Mike’s foot, just barely grazing the leg hair by his ankle. “Now, you want out of these jeans, do you?” He cocked a sly smile at his boyfriend, knowing he was teasing the hell out of him, which felt like part of the point of the handcuffs. 

Mike couldn’t take his eyes off of Chester’s hand stroking over his own cock, the movements mesmerizing. It was _his_ job to touch Chester that way, to make his boyfriend wet with desire, and the blatant teasing was getting under his skin. He was practically panting as he watched, as he answered, “yes, I need you to take them off, Ches. _Please._ ”

Without skipping a beat, Chester crawled onto the bed, grabbing the blindfold as he went. He straddled his lover, but he didn’t stop at his hips. Before long, he’d shimmied his way clear to Mike’s head, his legs spread on either side of Mike’s chest. He looked down, his stiff dick mere inches from Mike’s mouth. “Want to taste a little first?” he asked bucking his hips and letting the tip of his cock barely brush against Mike’s lips. 

The moan that came from Mike’s throat was completely unintentional, and he opened his mouth immediately, no inhibitions stopping him from going for what he wanted. He felt the wetness from Chester’s cock on his lips and he stuck his tongue out, tasting the precum that had been left behind as his boyfriend teased him. Without a single word, he looked up, communicating with his eyes how much he wanted to wrap his lips around Chester right then. That little move was all it had taken for his erection to make itself known, straining against his jeans as he tried to get his lips around his boyfriend. 

Chester leaned forward, his hands wrapping around the top rail of his headboard. He kept a close eye on what was happening as he pushed slightly forward, as he allowed the tip of his cock to slide between Mike’s lips. A soft moan purred from behind his closed mouth as Mike’s wet, hot mouth encased his most sensitive area. He could feel Mike’s tongue tap against his slit, then it pushed, as Chester’s mouth fell open. He allowed himself to slide in a little more before he pulled out. “You’re so naughty,” he teased as he scooted himself back, his hands hitting the mattress on either side of Mike’s head. He bent down, his hot breath fanning over Mike’s ear, “You ready to let go of all control now?”

Mike felt the ripple of desire clashing with the wave of apprehension as he heard Chester’s words. Of course he wanted to give up his control. That was, after all, his fantasy. But the part of him that had never trusted anyone enough, had never even considered giving all of the control to someone else, was causing butterflies in his stomach. _I trust him. If I didn’t, I never would have even brought this up. I would have never told him I wanted to do this. It’s Chester. It’s only Chester._

For a second, he held his breath, afraid to let go, but then Mike got himself together, turning his face toward Chester’s, catching his cheek with his lips and whispering, “yeah. You’re in charge, Ches. Whatever you want, that’s what I want.” He closed his eyes and sucked in another deep breath, his heart racing.

Chester pressed his lips to Mike’s ear, then to his cheek, before he sat himself up properly. He took the blindfold, and after fumbling with the strap, he got it around Mike’s head. He adjusted it to sit straight, covering Mike’s eyes. “How’s that?” he asked, his voice back to normal, all sexiness and teasing gone. “Does it feel okay?” 

“It’s fine,” Mike answered, his body screaming over the loss of contact. He liked the blindfold, it made him concentrate a little bit more on how Chester sounded, and how everything was feeling. The anticipation of not knowing what Chester was going to do next was a whole different level of excitement. He could hear their breaths, both of them breathing heavier and sharper than normal, and he could smell Chester’s skin, but that was all. He couldn’t pull him down, pull him closer, press their bodies together to satisfy his needs. He was at Chester’s mercy.

“Good,” Chester answered simply. He got off the bed again, and now he was at the foot, naked and looking over his boyfriend, who was tossing his head, trying to see. Chester smiled. “Now, let me help you with these.” Chester crawled back on the bed, down by Mike’s feet. He slid his hand over each one, just for a few seconds, before he moved forward. He let his erection rub against Mike’s leg as he undid his boyfriend’s belt. He yanked it from the loops, and then he popped the button at the top of the zipper fly. “Lift,” he ordered, tugging on the top of Mike’s jeans.

With both hands, Chester pulled the denims down, his hands grazing over Mike’s very evident erection, which was threatening to burst from behind his underwear. The bulge was large, and already there was a wet spot on the front of his boxer briefs. Chester hurried, pulling each of Mike’s legs free of the jeans before he tossed them away. Now it was really time to have fun. 

He scanned his boyfriend’s leg, and he shoved them apart, spreading them wide enough for him to get between them. He put his hands on the bed, on either side of Mike’s hips before he bent his neck, slowly rolling his tongue up the front of Mike’s underwear and over where his cock was hidden. He stopped, opening his mouth wide and wrapping his lips around the formation of flesh and arousal. He could feel Mike twitch. He could taste the wet spot, which was growing as he sucked and nuzzled his boyfriend through the thin fabric. 

It was better than Mike thought it would be and they were just getting to the good stuff. His lack of ability to touch and guide his boyfriend was making him crazy as Chester worked his mouth all around his cock, and every time he hit a particularly sensitive area Mike jerked against the cuffs before he remembered they were there. He wanted to cup his hand around the back of Chester’s head and press him close. He wanted to see his chocolate brown eyes looking up at him. He wanted Chester to get rid of his underwear and take him into his mouth, or wrap a hand around him, or _something._ “Ches, come on,” he whimpered, pushing his hips forward a little bit. He half hoped Chester would hurry, and the other part of him wondered how long Chester could hold out on him. 

Chester pulled back just a little, watching and enjoying his boyfriend struggle. The way he kept moving his hips. The way his voice was wet with need and lust. Everytime he heard the cuffs pull against the metal bed frame, causing a soft clanking sound, the excitement shooting through Chester upped a notch. He knew what Mike wanted, and it was time to go a step further. He wrapped his fingers into the top of Mike’s underwear, and with a little wiggle and back and forth, he got them down and off. 

Now Mike’s very happy erection was out in the open and Chester took a moment to take it in - the glisten of precum on his tip, the full length that had just the slightest bend in it, the dark color of his shaft and the lighter color of his tip. His balls that were sitting snug between his legs, and the soft, dark hair that encompassed it all. “Mmmmm,” Chester said, letting his voice be heard. “I love your cock,” he stated as he sat to the side of Mike’s legs. He leaned forward, not waiting for any kind of response from his boyfriend. He propped himself over Mike’s middle, before he bent his head. He opened his mouth wide, and in one swallow, he had almost Mike’s complete length in his mouth. He slid his lips up and down, gathering as much spit and natural lubricant as he could as he paced himself, sucking, kissing and licking every inch of what his boyfriend had. 

“Ohh… fuckkkk,” Mike moaned, the feel of Chester’s mouth around him totally unexpected. He stretched his fingers out, wrapping them around the ties that rendered him immobile, pulling again on the cuffs as he tried to keep himself from shoving his cock down his lover’s throat. All he could feel was the heat and slickness of Chester’s mouth, his tongue sliding around him, and already there was a growing pressure in his balls, in his stomach, an ache waiting to be released. Chester was an expert at going down on him and Mike tried to stifle the subsequent moans rising out of his chest, though he wasn’t sure why. 

For a few more moments, Mike let the assault continue, until he felt the familiar tingle rising in his body. It was far too soon to come- he wasn’t ready for this to end. “Ches, Chester, stop,” he called breathlessly.

The sound of Mike’s voice - the sound of the word _stop_ \- rang in Chester’s ears. He immediately pulled back. He licked his lips, and wiped his mouth as he looked toward the head of the bed. “Stop? Are you okay?” he asked, trying to find some sort of answer in Mike’s face, but without being able to see his eyes, it was hard. Every moan and movement had yelled _yes_ in Chester’s book, in his experience. Being told to stop before he’d really done much was unexpected. 

“Fuck,” Mike said through gritted teeth as he squirmed a bit on the mattress. “I’m fine, no, you’re fucking amazing,” he said, taking a deep breath. “I don’t know what’s wrong with me. It’s like I feel everything you’re doing times a hundred right now.” He shook his head slightly and mumbled, “just give me a sec… I… you had me close already.” He could feel his cheeks flush a little as he admitted he was having trouble controlling himself.

“Hmmmmm,” Chester hummed, as he gently feathered his fingers up and down Mike’s leg. “It’s the restraints, especially the blindfold. That leaves you with two options, Sexy Boy. We can leave the blindfold on, and we can move this on to something more serious, or I can take the blindfold off of you, and we can do more foreplay. I’m up for either,” he said, letting his fingers drift over to Mike’s cock, where he rubbed his fingers lightly over the tip, feeling the dampness. 

Mike moved his hips to the side with a whine, trying to avoid the contact for just another second. He needed to calm down. This whole thing was his idea and he wasn’t about to ruin it by being unable to control his reactions. _I just didn’t think I’d like it this much. It’s because we’ve started this twice already today and couldn’t finish, it has nothing to do with me being impatient. I can be patient. I can make this last, I think._ Decision made, he said, “keep it on, Ches.” He’d calmed down a little, it would be fine. He wanted to let Chester continue what he’d started.

Chester nodded, before he rolled his eyes at himself. Mike couldn’t see him. But now the moment to say something was gone. He leaned forward, spreading Mike’s legs, and once again he got between them. He braced his knees on the mattress, his hands on either side of his lover as he kissed him on his naked chest, then each of his dark nipples. He sucked on the little nubs for only a few seconds each before he moved on. He pecked soft, wet kisses up to Mike’s collar bone, and there he went up and over to get to the right shoulder, since Mike’s arms were up behind his head. When he’d smothered that area with affection, he worked his way back, doing the same to the other side. 

He lined their lower halves up, rubbing his cock against Mike’s. The heat, the feel of flesh on flesh was immense. Chester closed his eyes as he kissed up his lover’s neck. “God, you feel so fucking good,” he said, nipping at Mike’s skin. He pressed his hips down, pushing his dick hard up against Mike’s. 

“I hate not being able to touch you,” Mike breathed, digging his heels into the mattress and pushing against Chester’s thrust. Every kiss felt like fire on his skin, every place that Chester touched him felt electrified in a different way than usual. He knew it was only because he couldn’t watch what was happening, but everything was just a little more intense than normal. He could feel the wetness between them as their bodies slid together, and he stretched his head back to give Chester more access to his neck. “Don’t stop, please,” he begged, a complete change from his instructions minutes ago. “I love it when you do that.” 

Chester smiled. If Mike wanted more kisses, then he’d give them. He pressed his lips to Mike’s warm skin, first around the base of his neck, then up one side. He stopped at Mike’s ear, briefly sucking on his earlobe - on the hoop earing that was there - before he pecked his way down, and back around the bottom of Mike’s throat. He went up the middle, giving an extra nuzzle and lip pleasure to his lover’s Adam’s apple before he got up under his chin, and Mike leaned his head back, letting it continue. Chester’s teeth came out, latching onto the bottom of Mike’s jaw for a second, and in that moment he realized he was in a new place. Out of all the places he’d kissed and licked his boyfriend, this wasn’t one of them. It was virgin territory. 

The thought made Chester thrust a little harder, his erection sidestepping Mike’s cock and rubbing up against the other parts of his lover’s underside. The warm squishy feeling of Mike’s balls against Chester’s hard dick made him shiver in pleasure, and he did it again, all while his teeth and tongue made use of the underside of Mike’s jaw. He could feel skin and hair and the shape of Mike’s face, and it lit something animalistic inside Chester. His eyes were closed, his body working on its own as his thoughts focused only on the task at hand. 

Mike wanted more, but he was in no position to make that happen unless he wanted to ask for it. He could feel Chester’s cock poking him like it was looking for an entrance, and Mike was past ready. The feel of teeth against his skin, the light bites and scrapes Chester was placing on his jaw, all of it was good. The air between them was humid and heavy as they shared kisses and fluids, as Chester’s hands and mouth roamed all over Mike’s skin. 

He knew that he wasn’t supposed to be calling the shots, and that they were there for his fantasy, but for some reason, he was ready to make good on Chester’s earlier request. He wanted to give Chester what he wanted, he wanted to know what it would be like to be in control of their lovemaking. He was finished being at Chester’s mercy for now. He wanted Chester, and he was tired of waiting. “Ches,” Mike gasped out as Chester’s teeth pulled at his neck, “I want to fuck you. Now.” 

The words rang through Chester’s ears and he stopped. For a second he thought he’d heard his boyfriend wrong, that the heat of passion and the sexual teasing going on had slurred something. “What was that?” he asked, pulling back just a little, his heart still beating a bit fast from all the excitement. 

“You heard me.” Mike’s voice was raspy and he heard the undertone of something domineering in his tone. There was no room for nerves now, he’d blurted it out, and he meant exactly what he said. “I. Want. To. Fuck. You.” His words were measured and slow, and he caught his breath as he waited for them to sink in properly. 

Chester was frozen, just mere inches from Mike’s face. He could hear his boyfriend breathing, and as the concept of what Mike was asking for - what he was demanding - finally pieced together in Chester’s mind, something like excitement followed. Chester sat himself up a little more. “Really?” he asked. “But you can’t do that with the cuffs on. You want to take them off already?” 

Mike twisted his wrists impatiently inside the cuffs, and they both heard the clank against the headboard as he commanded, “take them off. You’re making me crazy like this. I have to touch you… take them off.” 

Chester nodded before he maneuvered himself off of Mike. He was on his knees to the side as he scooted himself up to the headboard. “Okay, give me a second,” he said, looking down at Mike’s still blindfolded face, and smiled. He pushed his way past the pillows and after some fumbling, he found the push button on the first cuff. The restraint popped open, and Mike immediately jerked his wrist free. “Hang on and I’ll get the other one,” Chester assured him as he leaned over and wrestled with the second one. 

Before Chester managed to pop the second cuff open, Mike had the blindfold off and had his free hand on Chester’s side, touching any bit of skin he could reach. He wanted to feel every bit of skin he’d been denied while he’d been restrained, but he also wanted to pull Chester close to him by the hips and see what he’d been missing so far. Chester had planted the idea earlier and now Mike’s mind was racing with thoughts of what it would feel like to turn the tables, to be the one with his fingers and his dick inside his boyfriend. 

The cuff popped open and Mike grabbed at Chester, pulling their bodies together urgently as soon as he was free. Without another word he slammed his mouth into Chester’s carelessly, a little bit harder than he’d intended, and shoved his tongue forward in a demanding kiss. _I’ve got to do this before I let my nerves get in the way. I want to fuck him so much, and I don’t want to screw this up._ Everything was hot and close and wet, and Mike slid one hand down to cup under Chester’s ass and hold him tightly. _Lube. I need lube. And I need to calm down or I’m going to rush this, and I don’t want to hurt him._

Chester felt Mike’s hand on his ass, and he bucked his hips on instinct. He went to move, to raise himself up a little for leverage, but his boyfriend had him locked down. Mike’s kisses were needy, and as Chester allowed it, shoving his tongue back in return and trying hard to keep up with what Mike was trying to do, he had to figure the restraints had all been too much. _Or I was too much. Too much teasing. I teased the fuck out of him, and now he’s lost his mind. He’ll calm down in a minute. _The idea that Mike was actually going to dominate what was quickly coming almost didn’t seem real. Chester was already thinking ahead, already planning on breaking their kisses to grab the lube and move this forward.__

__Mike pushed against Chester’s body with his own, managing to flip them and get Chester on his back before he broke their kiss and looked down into his boyfriend’s eyes. He thought Chester looked a little bewildered at the sudden change in how this was all playing out, and he paused long enough to ask him, “is this okay?”_ _

__Mike was hovering above him, panting. “Yeah,” Chester answered, his own breath labored. “Fuck yeah, Sexy Boy.”_ _

__It was all the encouragement Mike needed, and he dropped a quick kiss on Chester’s lips before he rolled away to grab their lube from the nightstand. He was back at Chester’s side quickly, and as he dropped his hand down to Chester’s thigh, he was suddenly seized with a bit of insecurity. He’d never done any of this before, and he wanted to do it right. “Ches,” he asked, feathering his fingers over his boyfriend’s skin, “I… I don’t even know what you like, and, well… if it’s not what you want, you’ll stop me, okay? This was your fantasy, after all.” He waited for a moment, screwing up his courage._ _

__Chester could hear the concern in his lover’s voice. He reached his hand up, trying to touch Mike’s face. “Hey, we’ll go slow, okay? Start with one finger,” he instructed as he spread his legs open. “And if something doesn’t feel right, I’ll let you know.”_ _

__Mike dropped his eyes to Chester’s now familiar cock, and traced his hand over the length briefly before he looked back up at his boyfriend, at the excitement and encouragement in his eyes. He guided his hand down, seeking underneath his ball sack, probing his middle finger around gently until he felt his target, and heard the hitch in Chester’s breathing. _This is it, we’re going to do this._ He cautiously pressed his finger forward before he pulled his hand back, bringing his finger to his mouth and swirling his tongue around it for a little bit of lubrication. He half smiled at himself for not doing that first, then went right back again, this time locating his target and pressing his finger forward a bit more confidently. He felt Chester’s body give to him and the immediate warmth of his body hugging his finger, and Mike bit down on his lip as he watched Chester’s face and slowly slid his finger all the way in. _ _

__Chester’s eyes were closed. It wasn’t the first time he’d been penetrated, but it was the first time by Mike. Even if it was only a finger. The sensation ripped up his body, and as Mike slid his finger all the way in, Chester arched his back in pleasure. His mouth fell a little slack, a soft moan seeping out. He had one hand on the sheets, his fingers balled into them, but his other hand was on Mike, holding onto his leg._ _

__The pleasure on Chester’s face made Mike’s dick ache with need. He wanted to make them both feel good, and he concentrated on the little sounds Chester was making as he moved his finger in and out, and wiggled it a bit before he decided to go ahead and add another. He watched Chester’s eyes squeeze tighter as he played for a moment, trying to take care to stretch his lover the same way that Chester did for him. He was lost in the heat and the way Chester would tighten and then relax around his fingers, thinking about how that would feel around his dick. It was something he wanted badly._ _

__“Ches? You tell me when you’re ready… just tell me,” he breathed, leaning forward to drop kisses on his stomach, making a path toward his leaking cock._ _

__“I’m ready,’ Chester stated without thought. His dick was hard, and he’d been tingling with pleasure ever since Mike’s finger had entered him. “God, I’m ready,” he said, his hand traveling from Mike’s leg up to his side as he turned his head and opened his eyes. “Let me turn over, it’s easier that way.”_ _

__Without argument, Mike withdrew his fingers and watched his boyfriend, his love, turn over and prop himself up on his knees. He reached for the lube and his hands were shaking as he poured it out into his hand and then ran his hand up and down his length, coating himself well. “I love you,” he said as he reached for Chester, sliding his clean hand down his lover’s back as he got between his legs. “I love you so much.” Mike paused and closed his eyes for a second, trying to calm himself down. The lust from earlier had given way to something that was more like excitement mixed with tenderness, and he wanted Chester to know this was a big deal to him, just like the first time they’d been together. This was another first, and Mike was sharing it with him._ _

__Chester glanced over his shoulder, catching the sentiment in his boyfriend’s eyes. “I love you too,” he said, a faint smile spreading his lips as he spread his legs just a little further apart. “And I can’t wait for what we’re about to do.” He looked away, his eyes dropping back to the bed and their flannel sheets as he took deeper breaths, trying to keep his body calm. If he was too worked up, too excited, then everything would clench. He pulled the air in, and then let it back out in long exhales as he felt Mike moving around between his legs._ _

__“Okay… okay…” Mike reassured himself as he kept one hand on Chester’s ass, his thumb pulling a bit so he could see what he was doing, his other hand guiding his cock right to its destination. He felt the slipperiness of the lube as his head touched Chester’s opening, and he took a deep breath, making contact and pushing forward, and feeling the second that the head of his cock was swallowed by his boyfriend’s body. The surprise of it, the tightness, the warmth, stole his breath away and he was completely still, his own body adjusting to the new sensation._ _

__The first push was always the hardest. And the most exciting. Chester’s eyes were open, his concentration on the black and red pattern of their sheets. His body cringed a little as he felt Mike enter, his fingers curling into the sheets he’d been staring so hard at. He grit his teeth for a moment as his body adjusted, as it opened and latched around the thicker part of Mike’s head, and then onto the top of his shaft. “Fuuuck,” Chester hissed as he gulped the air. He waited, and a second later, the burning and stretching sensation calmed, and Chester knew that absolute pleasure was coming next. “I’m good Mike, keep going,” he said, as he dropped his upper half down, the side of his face on the bed. His eyes were closed now, his back curved almost into a C shape._ _

__Mike sucked in a breath through his nose and nodded, even though Chester couldn’t see him. “Okay,” he said again, sliding his hand to Chester’s hip as he pushed in a little further. And then a little bit more. It was so much to take in so quickly. “Damn. This… feels so good,” he managed to say as he slid all the way inside, his body pressed flush against Chester’s. His whole body was on fire with urgency, every bit of movement he made radiating through his shaft and then through his legs, the desire that had been building since they’d come upstairs building in the pit of his stomach. He bowed his head toward Chester’s back and pulled on his hips, connecting them as tightly as possible._ _

__Chester felt Mike move his body, pulling on his hips and arranging things. His bottom felt full, a feeling he loved - a feeling his cock loved even more. “Let me have it,” he said, keeping his eyes closed. “God, Mike, I’m ready. I want it.”_ _

__Mike pulled back, then pressed back in, his first strokes cautious as he felt things out. Chester was so tight around him, a sensation he’d never felt before, and it didn’t feel as though he’d make it very long. He scrunched his eyes closed and chanted to himself to calm down as he set up a steadier pace, as he allowed his cock to slide in and out of Chester’s body, as he gripped his hips tightly and didn’t bother to hold back the moans of pleasure while he fucked his boyfriend. It was such a painful sort of pleasure for him, trying to savor what he was doing but not come too soon, and then there was the matter of making sure Chester had an orgasm as well, and Mike’s head was spinning with everything that was happening._ _

___I must be doing something right for him to sound like that._ Chester’s small cries of pleasure were reaching Mike’s ears and giving him confidence, and he dared to let one hand move from its anchor on Chester’s hip and slide down his back. His eyes were on the black spiked collar that Chester still wore, and he wanted nothing more than to get his hand on that bit of leather and give it a good tug. It was just enough out of reach that Mike needed to lean forward, his body over Chester’s back, in order to hook two fingers underneath and pull back on it. _ _

__Chester’s mind was gone. His usual images of pleasure flipping through one by one, the way they always did as his orgasm was building. He could feel the tightness in his balls, the almost painful stiffness in his cock as Mike worked behind him. As his boyfriend slammed in and out of him at a pace that was sending shock after shock of pleasure through Chester’s lower parts. It was getting close, and just as Chester was about to reach under himself to grab his needy cock, to stroke it a few times to bring his orgasm out, he suddenly felt Mike’s hand on his back. It was a new sensation, and second later there was a tug on his neck._ _

__Chester’s eyes flew open, his rotating images gone from his mind as he suddenly became very aware of where he was, as Mike’s fingers pulled on the spiked collar. Chester’s head raised, his neck stretching as pressure was put on it as Mike held the position while he kept the steady in-and-out pace. Chester’s mouth dropped open. All he managed were quick, hot breaths as the pressure in his scrotum pushed up - an urgent wave that rushed forward, and with a jerk in his voice he let out a gaspy moan. The roll of build up bounded forward, and a second later he felt the release, like everything in his body was being pulled out by a rope and a whip. His hips bucked as his slit opened and his semen spilled onto the bed, once and then a second time, both in unison with Mike’s hard thrusts. His neck was still being restrained by the spiked collar, and his moan of satisfaction came out in a haughty, hitched breath._ _

__The feel of Chester’s orgasm, the way his body squeezed around Mike’s cock as he released, was another sensation that Mike wasn’t fully prepared for, and he moaned along with his boyfriend while it happened. He couldn’t stop, didn’t want to stop, his thrusts on automatic and his fingers tightening on Chester’s hip. Mike let go of the collar to gain better control over Chester’s spent body, holding him in place as he pushed forward, feeling his own orgasm coming, the way his legs shook and his balls tightened. He heard each moan from Chester, heard his heavy breathing, felt the constriction around him, and a few more thrusts was all it took for him to shoot cum all inside his boyfriend. It was the most intense orgasm Mike had ever felt, the moment of release like an explosion; not just one, but several, the first causing smaller shockwaves as he continued to pump his hips forward. As he rode the waves down his thrusts slowed, and Mike finally stopped moving, his heart racing and his breathing ragged, and bent to drop his forehead on Chester’s back. His body sagged into Chester’s and he lay against him for a moment before he croaked, “ _fuck._ You okay, babe?”_ _

__Every bit and piece of Chester was numb. He could hear himself breathing, and he could feel Mike’s hot body resting on his. He opened his eyes, his vision blurry for a second before it focused. “Yeah,” he said between pants. “More than okay. And you?” he asked more out of habit than real concern that Mike wouldn’t be right as rain about now._ _

__Mike felt the slow smile crawl over his lips as he considered exactly how he was feeling. “ _Fuck._ I’m fucking good. And… I think I’d be open to doing that again… you know, if you are.” He reached to tickle his fingers over Chester’s side, thinking that he needed to peel his body away from his lover’s skin, but feeling too satisfied to move._ _

__The teasing sensation hit Chester’s damp skin immediately, and he flinched, pulling his arm in so Mike’s fingers couldn’t get too close to his armpit. “God, Mike, don’t,” he giggled, trying to pull away, despite being very stuck exactly where he was. “I don’t have the energy to protect myself,” he added. His body was worn out, and the longer they stayed in the position they were in, the more obvious that became. “I need some water,” he mumbled._ _

__“I wasn’t trying to tickle you,” Mike apologized immediately. “Water? Okay… I guess I’ll move then.” He carefully lifted himself off Chester’s back and then pressed his lips together as he pulled out, slowly, hoping he wasn’t hurting his boyfriend. It was always the worst part for him._ _

__The moment Chester felt Mike’s cock exiting his bottom, he braced himself. He mouthed the word _slow_ but the sound wasn’t there. He grabbed onto the sheets, and a moment later, he was empty, his boyfriend off to his side, and Chester collapsed. He knew he was lying in his own cum, and that was a bothersome thought, but he really just needed a minute to regain his strength. To get up and clean up the bed, and himself and get some water. _ _

__Mike turned his head to look at his boyfriend, lying spent on the sheets, and satisfaction slid over his consciousness. _I did that. I made him look like that. Me._ “Babe?” he asked softly. “You want me to get you some water? No, don’t answer that. I’m gonna go get you some water.” He leaned over and traced a soft kiss down Chester’s shoulder before he swung his tired legs off the bed. “Don’t move. I’ll bring you a towel, too.” _ _

__Chester opened his eyes to see Mike standing up and heading for the stairs. It was nice. Since they’d been together, their roles had been reversed. Chester had always been the one to fetch the water and the towels and even to do the clean up, as Mike would lay in exhaustion._ _

__But not this time. _He’s amazing. Damn right we can do this again._ Chester went to sit up, to at least pull himself off the sweaty, cummy sheets, but he couldn’t. Not yet. Instead he let his eyes slide shut to enjoy the after sex euphoria. _ _

__****  
TBC_ _


	25. Control Issues

Mike hummed quietly as he moved around the kitchen stealthily, gathering his ingredients and supplies carefully so he wouldn’t wake Chester. He couldn’t quite put a finger on what it was that he was feeling this morning, but something was different. There was the post-sex euphoria from yesterday that he was still basking in, and something else. Some sort of shift in the universe, a change in how the same world looked through his eyes today. 

He flicked his gaze toward the loft as he set a mixing bowl down on top of a kitchen towel. Chester had opened his eyes to a completely different world, one where he felt less like an observer of what was happening. Less like a passive participant. He’d be lying if he said that he didn’t enjoy being in control yesterday afternoon, grabbing Chester by the hips, being inside his boyfriend… and that collar. That collar had really pushed him over the edge.

Mike felt a shiver of anticipation slide down his spine as he remembered the way Chester had reacted to him when he tugged on that collar, the way he trembled and fell apart underneath him. _I did that. I made him feel that way, me. I want to do it again. I won’t be so scared this time. I’ll take him a little harder, I’ll last longer. He felt so fucking good, I almost want to do it again before pancakes._

He paused and considered his plan, glancing around at the spread in front of him and the pans he’d placed on the stove. _No. Food first. I need to keep my energy up._ Mike rolled his eyes at himself and grinned. _You’re such a dork, Shinoda._ He measured everything out and mixed it up, keeping an ear open for any sound from upstairs. The goal was to not wake Chester up until the pancakes were ready.

As he watched his pancakes on the skillets, Mike’s thoughts drifted around the past week. The visit to YRS. Telling Anna he was moving out. Finding out about Mark. The conversation he’d had with Chester about his parents. Leaving his teaching position. So much had happened in such a short amount of time. He slid the edge of his spatula under the side of a pancake to check it, then flipped them both, the smell of cinnamon hitting his nose. 

There was a possessiveness building inside Mike even though he couldn’t quite put a name to it. Everything in his life was wrapped around Chester now, so entwined that it was hard to remember what his life had been before they met. All Mike knew, while he stood there making pancakes on a Saturday morning, was that he would do anything for his relationship with his boyfriend to survive. Chester was his love, his home, and now part of his job. Nothing seemed scarier than the idea that it could all come apart if things at YRS didn’t go well. The familiar fingers of anxiety gripped his stomach as he wondered if he’d really be able to perform in front of the cameras. The bottom line now was - he had to figure it out. He had to make it all work for Chester, not just for their relationship, but to protect him from Mark.

_Mark will never lay a finger on him again. Not while I’m around. Not ever._ The thought made his stomach hurt. To him, Chester was so worldly and so capable, and finding out how he’d been manipulated and taken advantage of at work was sickening. The idea that he’d been unable to stand up for himself physically hurt Mike. But now, now that was all over. He’d be at YRS, and they had a deal. A contract. Mark couldn’t touch him anymore.

With a stack of pancakes ready to go, Mike turned off the burners and made his way upstairs, anxious to wake his boyfriend. It was surprising he’d managed to sleep the entire time Mike was in his kitchen. _I must have really worn him out yesterday._ A smile crept over his face as he slid into the bed, wrapping his arms around Chester’s naked body and pulling him over close. He gently rubbed his lips, then his nose, across the back of Chester’s neck, alternating between dropping tiny wet kisses there and inhaling his boyfriend’s scent. He snuggled their hips together and leaned over, nibbling at the bottom of Chester’s earlobe before he breathed a whisper into his ear, “good morning, babe… wake up…”

Chester’s eyes eased open, the bright light of the morning hitting him a little hard and he squished them closed again immediately. Mike’s warm body behind him was a welcoming feeling, and he shifted his ass back just a little more. “We don’t have to get up,” he mumbled. “There’s no work.” 

Mike felt his way around Chester’s skin, pressing his palms down just firmly enough not to tickle. He hugged Chester close and smiled into the curve of his neck before he kissed the sweet spot there and answered, “nope. But there’s pancakes. Cinnamon pecan ones.”

Chester instantly opened his eyes and picked up his head. “Food?” he asked, almost in a trance as he took a long sniff of the air. “You cooked already?” He tried to twist around to see Mike’s face, but it didn’t really work. All he could see was the ceiling and the fan slowly spinning above their heads. “How long have you been up? Shit, how long have I been asleep?” He let out a yawn as he turned back toward the clock. It was definitely time to get up. 

“You must have been tired not to fuss at me for being in the kitchen without you,” Mike answered with a low laugh. He kissed the back of Chester’s shoulder and then rubbed his nose there, too. He loved the familiarity of the other man’s body and the comfortable ways they touched each other. “I haven’t been up too long, pancakes are quick. But they’ll get cold if we don’t move it. Unless…” Mike stopped, having just considered another option. He lifted his head a little more to try to see Chester’s face. “Unless you want to have pancakes in bed. I could just bring them up here and you wouldn’t have to move.” 

Chester let out a quick snort. “No, that’s okay,” he said as he reached behind him and patted Mike on the hip. “Syrup in bed is a no-go. It’s sticky and messy, and no.” He yawned again as he pulled himself out of Mike’s embrace and sat up. He slumped forward as he rubbed his eyes. “I guess it is Saturday, so the pancakes turned out okay?” He twisted to the left, finally able to see Mike’s shining face. For so early in the morning, his lover looked rested and awake with bright eyes and hair that wasn’t styled yet, but it wasn’t a wreck either. 

For a second Mike wanted to pout about the no pancakes in bed rule, which seemed ridiculous given the other messy things they’d eaten in bed, like spaghetti. But he didn’t. He just swung his legs back over the side of the bed and said, “yep. Pancakes are a Saturday morning thing. These turned out awesome.” 

“I can’t wait,” Chester said as he tossed back the blankets. He scratched his naked side, and then his legs before running a hand over his flattened mohawk. “I’ve got to pee,” he muttered to himself as he moved to get up. He slipped on his underwear and pajama bottoms, which were folded on top of the nightstand before he glanced over his shoulder. “I could get used to pancakes on Satur. . .” He stopped, his mind drifting over work. They would be at YRS from now on every Saturday. Mike pancakes wouldn’t be happening very often. He cleared his throat and rambled off that he’d meet Mike downstairs before he headed that way. 

Mike tilted his head to the side in thought as he watched Chester disappear suddenly. It took him a minute to realize what he’d been about to say. Their Saturdays weren’t their own anymore, not after this one. _Well, we’re going to have to make it the best damn Saturday ever then._ He followed Chester downstairs but his boyfriend was already in the bathroom. Mike went back to the kitchen, making sure he’d cleaned up after himself so that Chester wouldn’t freak out after breakfast. He took both their plates and the syrup to the table, and turned around to grab their coffee. It just wasn’t Saturday morning pancake time without coffee.

Knowing exactly how Chester liked his coffee, Mike stirred the cream and sugar in before he took it to the table, just as Chester came out of the bathroom. “I got your coffee, need anything else?” he asked, motioning at the table. 

Chester’s dark eyes went wide as he looked at the food bounty on the table, at the stacks of pancakes and steaming cups of coffee. “Damn,” he said with a grin. “You outdid yourself.” He took a step toward the table before he turned to look at the kitchen. From where he was standing, it looked like everything was okay. _Not that I don’t trust him or anything. . ._ He headed that way, scanning over the burners on the stove to make sure they were off, and that no crumbs were left on the counters. He let out a sigh of relief before he turned back to Mike, who was standing by the table, watching him. “Sorry,” Chester apologized quickly. “Just being neurotic.” He rubbed his bare arms before he met Mike at the table and took his seat, grabbing the syrup. 

“I know how you are,” Mike teased. “I was careful. And clean. One of these days you won’t worry so much, you’ll see I can be trusted with things like pancakes, and toast, and sandwich making.” He laughed at himself as Chester passed him the syrup. “I think I’ll buy a cookbook and figure out how to make something other than sandwiches. If you’ll let me, of course.” He criss-crossed diamonds of syrup across the top of his pancakes, a sharp a contrast to the ocean of syrup that was drowning Chester’s breakfast.

With a forkful of dripping pancake in his mouth, Chester nodded. He swallowed down what he’d taken and took a sip of coffee before he said, “You’re free to do what you want, but I like cooking for us. You don’t have to.” He sliced another massive junk of pancake and added, “but these are kick ass. Thank you.” He grinned at his lover before stuffing his face. 

Mike nodded before he looked down at his plate. “I’m glad you like them. It’s my one contribution apparently. I love you cooking for us, you know. Anytime you want me to help out, just let me know.” He ate a few bites, stealing glances at Chester and smiling at the joyful way he was inhaling the pancakes. He always ate fast when something was good. “What should we do today, with this whole entire day off? Got anything in mind?”

Chester’s mouth was tingling from all the sugary syrup - a feeling he loved. He could feel it moving through his arms and his hands were on the verge of shaking. It was the glory of a full-on sugar high. “Don’t we need to go get the rest of your stuff?” he asked, as he scooped up his last syrupy bite before he shoved his plate away and grabbed his coffee, licking his lips. 

“Oh, yeah. That’s probably a good idea.” Mike watched Chester take a sip of his coffee and hummed in satisfaction. It made him feel good every single time he prepared it the right way. “Hey! It’s the weekend, Anna might be able to help us out so that we don’t have to make so many trips. I figured we’d be doing it sometime next week, but if she’s free this afternoon, it could make everything easier. Want me to give her a call?” It wasn’t the way he thought he’d spend the afternoon, but it made sense to get the rest of his moving out of the way. Mike cringed at the thought of what they would do with his clothes and shoes. Not that he had much, but Chester’s closet was packed full. 

Chester glanced out the windows, the morning sunshine hitting his face. Mike had opened a few of them up, and the fresh ocean breeze was filling the loft. “Yeah, see if it’s okay to do today. I don’t think she’s been over here yet, has she?”

Mike shook his head. “Nah, I haven’t had her over without you… it’s not my place.” He flashed Chester a huge smile. “But now I can. Since it’s my place, too.” He felt the excitement leap over his heart again as he thought about it. “I can’t believe how much things have changed for us since the beginning. I never would have thought, I mean, well… I just didn’t know it was going to turn out like this, with you. But I’m so happy it has.” Mike reached over and rubbed his hand up Chester’s free arm and whispered, “I’m so fucking lucky.”

A smile cracked across Chester’s face as he took Mike’s hand and kissed it before he flung it away. “And so fuckin’ sappy,” he added with a laugh before he stood up. He grabbed his plate and scooted around the table to plant a kiss on top of Mike’s blue hair. “And I love fuckin’ sappy,” he whispred before he headed to the kitchen. He rinsed his dish and silverware and plopped them into the dishwasher before he turned around. He looked over the expanse of the loft - of the space - before his eyes traveled up to the half walls of the bedroom. “How much more stuff do you think you have?” he asked, his gaze dropping to Mike’s art supplies in the corner and his keyboard set up by the windows. 

“Um… well… there’s another crate of art stuff, and I’ve got more music. Some more clothes, but not much. Most of what I have is art stuff, it really seems to multiply. I’ve got a dresser, too, but I’m not sure we’ve got room for it. I told Anna she could keep the chair and I figured I’d sell my bed. Maybe I should just get rid of them both together.” Mike lifted a hand to his face and scratched over his chin as he considered what was left at his old apartment. “You now how it is when you move, it doesn’t seem like there’s much until you start moving it all. And between my little car and your sports car I didn’t figure we could get it all in one go.”

Chester rubbed his forehead. “God, it sounds like a lot. We need someone with a truck. Joe’s out of town,” he remembered, “so that scraps him. I think Ryan’s got a beat up old pick up. Maybe.” He let out a sigh. He hated to admit he really didn’t have a lot of friends. At least not good friends that he could ask to help move Mike’s things. Joe and Ryan were kind of it, and he could already see the disapproving look on his boyfriend’s face at the mention of Ryan’s name. “I don’t know,” he finally said, throwing his hands in the air. “I’m sure we’ll figure it out. If we have to make a million trips, then we’ll make a million trips.” 

He stopped for a moment, looking down at his bare chest and pajama pants. “I’m going to go get dressed. I’ll see if I can find space in the closet for you while I’m at it. We might even be able to squeeze your dresser in somewhere.” He headed across the room, stopping to squeeze Mike’s shoulder before he went on upstairs. 

“I’ll give Anna a call,” Mike called after him, watching Chester nod his head in response. _No fucking way we’re calling Ryan. I don’t care if I have to get rid of the dresser because we can’t get it over here. We’re not calling him._ Mike tapped the phone next to Anna’s name and waited for the call to go through. He’d figure it all out once he and Chester got over there. 

Upstairs, Chester was having a small breakdown. His hands were shaking as he looked over his closet. Both doors were open, and as he stood looking from one end of it to the other, it was very clear to him that there was no room for more. _I know he’s got, like, fifty flannel shirts. They’ll never fit in here!_ He scrubbed his fingers through his mohawk as he thought. He could feel his heart pounding, and even he had to admit that maybe he’d overdone it on the syrupy breakfast he’d gorged himself on. 

“Maybe I can weed some of this out,” he muttered to himself as he took out a few shirts - one after the other - but each time he put them back. “I really like that shirt. And my mom gave me this one,” he whispered as he tugged on the sleeve of a green shirt he hadn’t worn in over a year. _Maybe storage. Maybe I can pack some of them up. . .like winter and summer shirts? What if I get cold? Lord help me if I’m ever going to put on one of Mike’s flannels._

The thought of clearing out his clothes was overwhelming. Out of everything in the borrowed loft apartment, it was his wardrobe and his kitchen supplies that he loved the most. They were the only things that were truly his. 

_I think it’s all the sugar that’s getting to me,_ He decided as he grabbed a black t-shirt and a pair of darker jeans before he closed his closet. He was done looking at it for now. They’d have to figure it out eventually, but at the moment, it was too much. 

Mike stepped into the loft in time to see Chester turn from the closet, his eyes looking a little panicked. “Anna’s gonna help,” he started, then looked around the bedroom, trying to figure out what had changed Chester’s mood so drastically. “You okay, babe?” 

Chester had his chosen clothes in his hands, but he hadn’t moved away from the closet. “There’s no room,” he said, his whole body shaking, his voice trembling. “I looked, and the closet doesn’t have space for your flannels and I don’t know where to put your dresser, and we’re running out of space downstairs, too, and I don’t think I can pack up my stuff and send it away to some dark place where I’ll never see it.” 

Mike crossed the bedroom instantly and had his arms around Chester before he was even finished speaking. He could hear the panic in his boyfriend’s voice. “Hey, it’s gonna be okay. You don’t need to send any of your stuff away, Ches. I’d never ask you to do that. We’ll figure it out. Maybe it will be a little bit crowded, but that just means we’ll have to be closer to each other. And I don’t know about you, but that’s not a problem for me.” Mike smoothed his hands over Chester’s back and kissed the side of his face. “It’s gonna be okay.” 

Chester shut his eyes as he let his boyfriend hold him. He needed to calm down. He needed to pull himself together and stop losing it over some clothes. “I’m sorry,” he said, his voice muffled as he spoke into Mike’s shoulder. “I’m okay. I am. I just, I think I’m a little overwhelmed.” His heart was still beating twice what it should be as he wrapped one arm around Mike’s body. “I want you here, I want you here.” 

“I know,” Mike soothed, his voice low and his lips against Chester’s ear. “Why don’t you sit down for a minute? Come on, sit with me.” He let go, pulling his hand around Chester’s side and grabbing his hand. He moved them both over to the bed and sat down, reaching for the clothes in the Chester’s other hand and setting them on the nightstand. “We’ll figure it out,” he said again, his eyes on Chester’s face. He seemed to be calming down. 

“I know,” Chester admitted as he sat with his hands on his knees, taking deeper breaths. “I know we will. We’ve been through a hell of a lot and we always figure things out. I know my closet won’t be the death of us or anything, it just hit me all the sudden. It’s stupid,” he grumbled as he fanned his face with his hands. “I’m hot. Look at me, I’ve broken into a sweat.” He could feel his cheeks were flushed, and even his usually rather pale skin looked a shade warmer. 

Mike blew a cool stream of air over Chester’s face and smiled. “I’ve never known someone who loves clothes as much as you do. You’re so cute.” He waited patiently for Chester to relax before he reached over and squeezed his thigh. “I’m sure it’s probably inappropriate, but watching you panic over your clothes made me want to throw you down on this bed and distract you with something a little more exciting.” 

Chester stopped fanning himself as he looked over, his eyes meeting Mike’s. “What?” he asked, a boyish giggle escaping with his words. “Me having a nervous breakdown is turning you on?” He wasn’t sure how to take that, but Mike admitting to such a thing already had Chester’s troubled thoughts over closets and clothes and storage space on the back burner. His boyfriend was rubbing his thigh, and Chester could see the glint of lust in Mike’s dark eyes. _He’s not kidding._

“It’s not the nervous breakdown, it’s the thought of calming you down. Or maybe not calming you down, but redirecting you. Making you see that closet space is just not all that important.” He leaned over and pressed a kiss to Chester’s neck, then another, following the curve of his chin around until he couldn’t reach any further. “See? Are you still thinking about the closet?”

“Maybe,” Chester said, cocking his eyebrow. “But a few more kisses like that and I’ll probably let it go. For now.” 

It sounded like a challenge, and Mike was ready for it. He stood up and knelt down in front of Chester, between his knees, and looked up at him, enjoying the look of confusion on his face. “Why don’t you lay back? I think you might be a bit overdressed for what I have in mind.” He hooked his fingers over Chester’s pajama pants and waited for his lover to follow directions. 

Chester never needed much encouragement when it came to getting naked, and he looked at Mike for only a second before he lay back, allowing Mike to drag his pajama pants and underwear off in one motion. From his position on the floor, Mike had a great view of Chester’s strong thighs, his ball sack, his limp dick that wasn’t going to stay that way for long. He leaned forward and started at Chester’s knees, kissing and biting his way up one thigh and then the other, running his hands over the backs of his calves. Mike’s body was already feeling the heat of arousal, and he could feel the little trembles of anticipation from Chester’s. He could get used to this morning sex thing. 

Chester was shifting back and forth from looking up at the ceiling fan to closing his eyes. He spread his legs a little wider as Mike switched from one leg to the other, leaving a trail of wet kisses behind him. The moment he felt Mike’s nose touch the bottom of his ball sack, Chester’s dick woke up and started to jump with movement. “Fuuuck,” Chester whispered as he reached down to grab himself, sliding his hand over his head and shaft. It wasn’t going to take much more, and he’d be leaking. 

Watching Chester touching himself was an instant awakening for Mike’s own dick, and he reached down to shift things around before he decided to just get naked too. “Hang on,” he told Chester, standing up to shed his own pajamas quickly. He kept his eyes on Chester’s hand, moving slowly back and forth on his cock, and Mike matched the movements with his own hand on himself. Same pace, same strokes as he stood over his boyfriend, and he licked his lips as they watched each other. “Scoot up onto the bed, Ches.” 

Without a word, Chester did as he was told. He stretched himself out from one end to the other. He raised his head to see what Mike was doing. “Are you coming to join me?” 

Mike crawled up onto the bed and right between Chester’s legs, dropping his hands down on either side of Chester’s hips before he licked a line across his stomach. He felt Chester pull a breath in and his stomach pull back, and he smiled, knowing he’d hit a ticklish spot. “You still thinking about our closet?” he asked, dipping his tongue into Chester’s bellybutton and then giving the skin above it a little bite. 

The grin on Chester’s face - half from being tickled and half from being aroused - was wide. “A little,” he said, gripping at the flannel sheets under them. “You might have to do something drastic to get my mind totally off of it.” 

Mike didn’t lift his hands to help or give any further preamble before he opened his mouth and let his lips slide over Chester’s cock, and all in one motion he took him in as far as he could go. If that wasn’t drastic, Mike would have to admit defeat. He swirled his tongue over every inch of cock in his mouth before he pulled out a bit, sucking his cheeks in as he went. He wasn’t in the mood for gentle, not right now. He urgently wanted to get Chester back on his knees like the day before, but he wasn’t entirely sure that’s where they would end up. _What are the rules like now? Do I ask? It seems wrong to assume he wants me to just be on top, I should ask. But maybe it’s better if I just take control. I don’t know. Maybe I’ll just ask._

He struck a steady pace before he moved a hand down to play with Chester’s balls. He loved the way they felt in his hand, sliding them around gently as he considered his next move. He was pretty sure Chester wasn’t thinking about the damn closet anymore, and he smiled a little as he lifted off his cock and looked up. “I know you’re not thinking about it now,” Mike teased, curling his hand around Chester’s shaft, taking the precum and saliva there while he talked. “I bet I can make you forget about everything to the point you wouldn’t even care if we kept any of your clothes.”

Mike didn’t wait for a response before he took his hand away and took Chester back into his mouth, feeling satisfied that his boyfriend could only moan at his actions. With his lubed up hand he sought out Chester’s opening, moving his ball sack out of the way and pressing a finger inside as he continued the blow job he was giving.

Chester had a smart ass remark ready just as he felt Mike’s finger enter his anal cavity. It was a gut reaction. His body jerked as his heels dug into the mattress and his back arched a little. He hadn’t been expecting it, and the sudden penetration sent an extra wave of excitement through him. His mouth fell open as he moaned. Loud. His eyes were shut as he blindly reached for his lover. His fingers quickly found Mike’s soft hair as his other hand held onto the sheets for dear life. 

Using first one finger, then two, Mike had Chester squirming under his touch on the bed as he prepared the way as gently as he could manage. He wanted to be inside his boyfriend so badly he could hardly stand it, but he wasn’t quite finished with the feel and taste of Chester in his mouth. The precum was steadily flowing and Mike was taking it all in, exploring around with his fingers as he went, enjoying the way Chester was reacting to his touch. He knew he wouldn’t be able to tease him much longer. The tremble and quake of Chester’s thighs was a sure signal that he was about to come, and Mike wasn’t ready to let that happen.

He pulled back again, letting Chester’s dick pop from his mouth with a gentle slap to his stomach, and with his fingers still inside, said, “I want you to turn over. I’m going to get the lube, and you’re going to get on your knees for me - but no touching yourself, Chester. Hands off, okay?”

Chester opened his eyes and lifted his head. He was breathing hard, his whole body on ten as he looked at Mike. It was the first time he’d ever heard such authority in his boyfriend’s voice in the bedroom. “Okay,” he agreed, anticipation zipping through his mind. He squirmed as Mike pulled his fingers out, but Chester didn’t waste any time. He turned over, and got on his hands and knees. He dropped his head to look at himself. He could see his hard dick hanging between his legs, begging to be touched, and Chester had to dig his fingers into the bed to stop himself from obeying that impulse. 

Mike couldn’t help but smirk, spotting the way Chester’s hands were clawing into the bed. There was no way he was worrying about that closet now. As he reached for the lube, his hand brushed over the collar Chester had worn yesterday, and Mike’s dick jumped in response. _I’m gonna put this back on him. I’m not even gonna ask, I’m just gonna do it._

He grabbed both the collar and the lube and settled back behind Chester. Even though he knew Chester couldn’t see what he was doing, Mike still whispered, “close your eyes,” as he slipped the collar over Chester’s head and brought it up against his skin, quickly buckling it before he leaned forward and took a quick nip at Chester’s ear. “There. That’s better,” he whispered, his lips gracing over the outside of Chester’s earlobe as he tugged lightly on the collar. 

The moment Chester felt the leather around his neck, his eyes popped open, and his dick ached a little harder. He loved the damn thing, and having Mike take the initiative to put it on him without even asking, was a turn on. “Fuck, Sexy Boy,” Chester half hissed and half moaned, “hurry up.” A second later Mike tugged on the collar, and Chester’s hips bucked, his nails digging into the bed. 

“You’re so impatient all of a sudden,” Mike mumbled as he sat back, lube all in his hand as he watched Chester grab the sheets even harder. He stroked the slippery substance over himself and tossed the bottle aside, taking a deep breath. This would be better than yesterday, he wasn’t so afraid of hurting Chester this time. He ran a lubed finger down Chester’s ass crack and heard another whine come from his boyfriend. It was time.

Mike scooted back up and took Chester’s hips in both hands, his thumbs pulling on his butt cheeks enough to expose his opening, and Mike bit down on his lip. It took him a moment to line everything up properly, and he ended up holding his dick in one hand as he pressed forward, allowing the head of his shaft to find the inside of Chester’s body. He knew better what pressure to apply this time, and he popped right inside, holding still for a moment and waiting for a signal from his lover to keep going. 

Chester’s knees were braced into the mattress, and his head was down as he felt the tip of Mike’s dick slide inside. Everything clenched for a second and Chester opened his mouth, taking in the deep, long breaths to get everything to relax. He squeezed his eyes shut, the sharp pain in his ass drifting away slowly until it was gone all together. “Okay,” he said, and he dropped his front half down on the bed. “Go.” 

Go was the best word Mike had heard all day. He pushed the rest of the way in slowly, biting down hard on his bottom lip as he went, both hands gripping Chester’s hips again. “Fuck. _Fuck,_ ” he gasped when he was fully sheathed, Chester’s body hugging tight all around him. “You feel so fucking good.” He pulled back slowly, then forward again, a few slow strokes to get everything good and slick and ready for more. It was unbelievable that he’d gone without doing this for so long. If only he’d known how good it would feel.

“You ready, babe?” Mike didn’t wait for an answer before he pulled back again and thrust inside faster, going a little deeper, another moan coming from his own lips. He could hear Chester’s breathing and he could feel his own heart racing, and he was ready to go harder, he just needed to hear that it was okay to go for it.

“Uh-huh,” Chester managed to get out, his mind only half hearing what Mike had said. The feeling of having his lover inside of him was fantastic, and as Mike continued to work behind him, he couldn’t believe that they hadn’t done this sooner. His body was being pushed forward and pulled backward as Mike’s grip on his hips stayed strong, and Chester knew it was about to get twice as good. He briefly thought about reaching under himself to grab his leaking cock, but Mike had ordered him not to, and Chester was trying hard to stick with that plan. 

It was all Mike needed to hear, and he quickly set up a satisfying pace, keeping Chester right where he wanted him as he thrust deeply, faster than he’d done yesterday, enjoying the way Chester’s ass met his body with each stroke. He was so hard, and Chester felt so good, and he kept pushing, seeking, trying to get deeper with each thrust. He could feel the sweat trickling down the side of his face as he pumped, working hard to keep the rhythm going.

As his senses became more clouded, as his body was taken by the lust and the hormones, Mike let go of Chester’s hip, immediately reaching for and taking hold of the black leather collar he’d put on his boyfriend. Electricity zipped through his body as he gripped it, and he tugged on it a little bit harder than before, almost like a test. How far would Chester let him go before it was too much?

As Mike pounded into his backside, Chester’s mind was quickly becoming mush. His body was ready to release, and the deeper Mike went, the more intense the bolts of pleasure were. Pressure had been building, and Chester felt his testicles tighten just as Mike’s fingers slipped into the collar. Instantly Chester’s head came up off the mattress as his neck stretched. His mouth fell open as he gasped and moaned all at once. The pressure against his throat was restrictive, but with it came an extra dose of thrill and excitement. It wasn’t going to take long. He could already feel the rush that was coming. 

When Chester didn’t stop him, Mike leaned forward, keeping his grip the same but changing the angle of his thrusts slightly. He was ready, the thrill of the control he had over Chester at the moment urging him on. He slammed back into him again a few more times, listening to the gasps and moans under him, before he finally said, “touch yourself for me.” It was a command, not a suggestion. 

Without thought, Chester’s left hand went right under himself. He grabbed his shaft, pumping it only once or twice before his floodgates gave way. The pressure burst through, and Chester’s whole body jerked as his orgasm hit violently. Cum went all over his hand and the sheets under him as he cried out in ecstasy, while gasping from the pull of the collar - a glorious mix he’d never felt so hard before. 

Chester’s voice, the sound of his release, was colored with the tones of complete euphoria, and Mike felt the satisfaction of what he’d been able to do in his bones. He scrunched his eyes closed tightly, not allowing himself to let go until he knew that Chester was finished. He wanted to ride out his boyfriend’s pleasure before he took his own, and when he felt the slump of Chester’s body toward the mattress, he released his hold on the collar to allow him to relax even more. MIke gripped both hips in his hands again, and he tried to keep his fingers from digging into the soft skin too hard as he pulled Chester into him to meet his last couple of thrusts before he finally let it happen. His body was wound so tightly that his orgasm hit him hard, the waves crashing over him as he pushed forward and felt his cum cover the inside of Chester in one huge shot. The aftershots, the subsequent waves, were hardly even registering in Mike’s brain, the relief his system felt after that first release obliterating any other sensation. It was overwhelming. He held on to Chester as he came and then slumped over his back, his heart racing and his breathing erratic. 

“Mike,” Chester called, his voice slurred with exhaustion. “Mike, that was. . .holy fuck.” He knew he wasn’t making any sense, but he couldn’t think straight. His body was spent, and trying to say something intelligent at the moment wasn’t happening. He tried to reach behind him, but his effort was for not, his lover was out of reach. 

“Yeah… fuck. Now I have to, I have to, fuck.” Mike shifted a little, trying to get his balance. “Hang on, babe, I’m gonna pull out.” He inched his way out slowly and then flopped down on the bed, his heart still racing. “Fuck. I bet you don’t have any cares about your closet now.”

The second Mike was out, and that dreaded empty feeling shot through Chester’s bottom, he collapsed. His left arm was trapped under him, everything growing sticky with dried cum. His free hand could reach Mike now, and Chester grabbed onto his nearby arm as he asked, “What closet?” 

“Exactly.” Mike closed his eyes with a smile. “Exactly.” 

****

Chester dug through a crate filled with spray paint cans. Most of them had dried drips of paint down the sides, and he cringed as he moved the crate from the place in the corner of Mike’s small apartment bedroom where it had lived for who knew how long. “Do you want to keep these?” he asked turning around to see Mike standing at the closet, pulling flannels and other articles of clothing off of hangers to be packed.

Mike paused with a handful of shirts and looked at Chester like he’d just asked him if the sky was blue. “Yeah? They’re not even half empty. That stuff’s expensive.” He shook his head and turned back to his closet. _He’s really going to lose it when I dig the boxes of new paint out from under my bed._

“Expensive?” Chester muttered as he picked one of the cans up by two fingers, his face twisting. “For these?” He dropped the can back in the crate and let out a sigh before he tugged at the collar of his black t-shirt. They’d only been working in Mike’s old room for less than an hour and already Chester was hot and having trouble breathing. The air was stiff, and Mike’s one window had stuff cluttered in front of it, so they hadn’t been able to open it. “Guess I’ll take ‘em out to the car then. _Your_ car,” he added under his breath as the thought of having the filthy looking paint cans in his new car made his stomach turn. _And they smell. I’d never get that smell out of my car._

“Thanks,” Mike called to Chester’s retreating backside, his eyes crinkling into a smile as he caught a glimpse of the collar Chester still had on from earlier. He was surprised when he’d playfully suggested that Chester keep it on that his boyfriend had agreed immediately. _I think he likes it more than he wants to let on. I fucking love that thing._ He dumped a pile of clothes on the bed and turned to grab some more just as Anna poked her head into the bedroom. 

She waited a moment, watching as Mike sorted through his small closet. “Everything going okay?” she asked. “I just saw Chester walk out with some of your paints. He’s not much of an artsy person, is he?” 

Mike shrugged without turning around. “He appreciates it, but that’s about it. I think the thought of having all my paint and stuff at his place is stressing him out. I kinda don’t want him to see how much is under my bed. He might have a total meltdown.” When his arms were full again, Mike turned and met Anna’s eyes. “Maybe I can distract him somehow and you can smuggle it all out to your car.” 

Anna took a step further into the room. She looked around at the boxes and piles and everything that still wasn’t packed. “I don’t think so,” she said, adjusting the bracelet on her wrist before her hands went to her hips, her fingers latching onto the top of the pockets of her jeans. “He’s going to find out, might as well be up front about it. I, uh, saw the spiked collar around his neck. That’s an interesting style. Not sure I’ve ever seen something like that before.” 

A faint heat crept over Mike’s cheeks when Anna mentioned the collar. All that mattered was that _he_ liked it, but he wasn’t about to get into why. “Um, yeah… you know, it’s that whole “edgy” thing,” he said, using his fingers for the air quotations. “I think it goes with the mohawk and all. It’s, um, it’s kinda like wearing a necklace. Nothing wrong with that.” He ducked his head and concentrated on getting his shirts in the bags he had open.

“Oh, no, nothing wrong with it,” she assured him quickly. “I’ve just never seen one.” She stepped over to Mike’s dresser, tracing her hand over the stack of music books that were sitting there. “Is he going to have enough space over there for everything? I guess I never realized how much you’ve managed to pack into this room. I know you’ve told me his place is big, but it’s still only one bedroom, right?” 

“Yeah. One bedroom.” Mike stopped packing and looked around, his eyebrows knitting together in concern. “He was concerned about it earlier, but I think it will be okay. I might have to buy a bookshelf or some sort of cabinet or something for all this music, I don’t think he’ll want it in stacks downstairs. And I have no idea how this dresser is getting over there, but his closet is packed full.” Letting out a frustrated sigh, Mike ran a hand through his hair and shook his head. “I’m trying to stay calm about it, but there is a lot of stuff. I don’t want to mess up his space with all my junk.” 

Anna tilted her head, her lips pressing into a soft smile. “I’m sure you guys will figure it out.” Before she could say more, she heard Chester coming back in the front door. “I’ll get out of the way and let you guys work. There’s not room for all three of us in here. Let me know if you guys need anything,” she said, just in time to do a side-stepping dance with Chester as she tried to leave, and he tried to come in. 

“Sorry,” Chester apologized before he found himself back in the little room. Looking around at everything was exhausting. “Okay, what’s next? We’re going to run out of room fast, even with three cars.” 

“I know. It’s exactly like I said,” Mike started before his phone rang from on top of the dresser. He reached for it, rolling his eyes before he looked at Chester. “It’s Dave. I guess I should answer.” Chester nodded and looked away, surveying the mess in the room as Mike stepped out of the bedroom to take the call. 

“Hey,” Mike answered cautiously. They hadn’t talked since Mike stormed away from dinner a few nights ago. He wandered out onto the porch for some air and sat down, watching a trail of ants on the sidewalk.

“Hey, man, I wanted to call and see how you were… you know, after the other night. I thought maybe you’d call by now.” Dave’s voice was also cautious, testing out the atmosphere of the call as he spoke.

The ants were marching along, some of them carrying bits that Mike could see, and he smiled to himself. It was ant moving day too. “I’ve been busy,” he said. “There’s been a lot going on, and I’m moving today.”

There was a silence on the other side of the line, then Dave cleared his throat. “So… I guess you’re still mad at me for questioning your move, huh?” 

Mike shrugged and looked out at the parking lot, squinting his eyes at the sunlight. “You were kinda being a dick, so, yeah. All I wanted was for you to be supportive. Not question everything and then bring up my parents. You know how shitty that is.” He knew he sounded bitter but the truth was, he was still hurt by his friend’s reaction to what Mike had considered good news. 

Dave blew out a long breath before he offered quietly, “that’s why I called. I knew you were still mad at me and, well, I just wanted to tell you that I _was_ being a dick. I’m sorry. I just felt like maybe you hadn’t thought everything through, and as your friend, I felt obligated to say something.” 

Chester pushed the front door open, and as he stepped out, holding another one of Mike’s art supply crates way out in front of him, he almost tripped over his boyfriend sitting on the steps. “Fuck, Sexy Boy,” he mumbled as he stumbled down the steps. “Sorry,” he whispered the moment he saw Mike was still on the phone. He didn’t wait to get a reply, he wanted to get the smelly crate to Mike’s car before it infected him. He practically ran the last few steps to the open back hatch of his boyfriend’s almost completely full vehicle. 

A silence lapsed over Mike and Dave’s conversation as Mike watched his boyfriend deposit more art supplies in his car with amusement. As Chester came back up the sidewalk, Mike winked and swatted a hand on his boyfriend’s ass before he remembered to say something to Dave. He was so easily distracted when Chester was around. “I’ve thought it through, and it’s happening now. And I’m in the middle of trying to figure out how to get all my stuff from one place to the other, so if that’s all you needed, I’m gonna let you go.” 

“Wait,” Dave said, his voice a little panicky. “Mike, I’m sorry. I’m not trying to tell you how to live your life, I’m just trying to be a good friend. And apparently I suck at it. I don’t want you to be upset. Are we cool?” 

Mike stood up and turned back toward the apartment. “Yeah, we’re cool. I’ll call you later, after we get things sorted. Maybe tomorrow. It’s gonna be a couple of trips. Unless…” he stopped as he remembered Dave’s pickup. “Unless you’re really sorry and want to make it up to me. You could come over here and haul some of my stuff over to Chester’s so it won’t take all day. That sounds like something a friend would do.”

There was a light chuckle on the other end of the line before Dave said, “fine, fine. I can do that. If that’s what it’s gonna take for you to forgive me, I’ll be over in about half an hour. I didn’t have anything more important to do today.”

“That sounds about right. What ever girl you were planning to hook up with is gonna have to wait,” Mike teased, his good humor toward his friend returning. “Make sure you let her down easy. I’ll see you in a bit.” They hung up and Mike felt relief settle over him. Maybe it wouldn’t take all day to move his stuff after all. And now he had a plan to get his dresser over to Chester’s. 

“Hey, Ches!” he called into the apartment as he stepped back inside. “Anna! I got Dave to come and bring his truck, he’ll be here in about a half hour.” Mike waited for a response, as neither Chester nor Anna were visible from the living room. 

Chester walked out of the bedroom and down the short hallway. His boyfriend had a relieved look on his face. “Really?” He asked, before his eyes dropped to the cheap parquet flooring that really needed to be ripped out and replaced. “He doesn’t like me. I’m surprised he’s going to help.” 

“That’s not true,” Mike argued, stepping forward to cross the space between them. “He’s protective of me, but he doesn’t dislike you. Hey,” he said softly, reaching a finger toward Chester’s chin, tilting his face up, “stop that. He’s known me my whole life, he’s just looking out for me. He likes you just fine. And we might get this all done in one trip, thanks to him.” Mike kissed the end of Chester’s nose and smiled slyly at him. “Just think, the faster we get the moving part over with, the more time we’ll have... alone… later.” He ran the finger from Chester’s chin down his neck and pulled on the black studded collar briefly.

Chester looked into Mike’s eyes, and he knew he was right. He was just being dramatic, and he could only blame the small apartment that felt like a torture chamber. It was making him feel trapped and out of place, and clumsy as he tripped over everything and banged his knee twice now on their hideous coffee table. He was ready to agree, just as Mike tugged on the spiked collar and Chester’s mouth instantly dropped open, his dick twitching from inside his jeans. “Well, when you put it that way,” he said, his hand going out to the front of Mike’s shirt. He scratched his nails into it, but only for a second before he came to his sense and smiled instead. “We need to hurry.” 

“Okay,” Mike whispered, patting his hand over Chester’s. “Come on. I need to show you the stuff under my bed.” He didn’t wait for an answer, he just pulled Chester along behind him to the bedroom to finish digging out the rest of his things.

****

Despite Chester’s hesitation, Dave and his truck had been more than handy. They had managed to pack Mike’s entire bedroom up in one trip, and by the time they’d carried it all up to Chester’s sixth floor loft - and thank God for the elevator - the mood had lightened. Chester had even managed to get Dave to laugh a few times as he related silly Mike stories, and things really took a turn toward a more social feeling when Chester offered to order pizza for everyone - his treat. 

He stood in the kitchen, his cell phone still in hand as he looked out over his once very minimalist space. Now there were boxes and crates and bags and things he wasn’t even sure of cluttering the polished cement floors. They had lined most of it up along the windows, save the few things they’d taken upstairs already, including Mike’s dresser, which didn’t quite have a home yet, but there were plans being made. 

Chester let out a long sigh, his shoulders slumping a bit. His legs, arms and back were tired, and he was ready to sit down. _A drink would be nice though. A martini. Yes._ He looked toward the living room area where Mike was showing off the view to Anna and Dave, and his giant painting he’d done many months ago while Chester had been in Hawaii. “Mike, guys!” Chester hollered as he headed toward them, stopping at the couch. “Anyone want a drink while we wait for pizza? I got beer or I can make us some martinis.” 

Dave quirked an eyebrow at Mike, but Mike neatly ignored the questioning look from his friend. “Why don’t you make martinis? Show off your bartending skills?” Even if he wasn’t a big fan of drinking, they were at home, they were in a safe space, and Mike was proud of Chester’s abilities in the kitchen. One drink wouldn’t be a bad thing. “Just one, though, Ches. Dave and Anna will have to go home later, that could be bad.”

Chester waved his hand through the air. “I can always call in a ride for them. Martinis it is,” he said with a grin on his face before he headed back to the kitchen. He opened his cabinets, pulling down his stainless steel martini shaker set, along with the vodka and some apple schnapps. “Vodka apple martinis,” he half announced as he looked back toward the living room to see if anyone would object. 

When his guests all nodded, Chester set to work measuring each drink out, and filling the shaker with ice cubes. He took down four martini glasses, and one by one he filled them up. 

“Thanks, Chester,” Anna said as she was the first to take one. “It looks delicious.” She took a small sip, the alcohol and apple flavoring stinging her tongue and she smiled. “I haven’t had one of these in a long time.” 

“They’re fun to make. It’s kind of like cooking only not,” Chester answered. “I’ve got peach flavoring too, if you want one of those next.” 

Anna took another sip. “That’s tempting, but Mike’s right, I need to drive home later. I love your place by the way. It’s just as beautiful as Mike’s always said.” 

Chester thanked her as he agreed, and then he got to work on the next martini as Anna stepped away to take another long look out the wall of windows and the ocean view they offered. 

Mike handed off a drink to Dave and then took his, leaning over to kiss Chester on the cheek. “Thanks, babe,” he whispered, turning away and taking his drink over to stand by Anna. “I love it here. Thanks for being so cool about me moving out. I hope it won’t take long for you to find someone to replace me.” He took a sip of his drink and winced. Chester always made them strong.

“I’m happy for you, Mike,” she said, her eyes fixed on the blue expanse. “And it’s a lovely apartment. I can see why you’d want to be here, and well, with Chester of course. And I’ve already been talking with one of my girlfriends about moving in, so I think it’s going to work out really well. I’m glad you and Dave patched things up,” she added in a whisper, her eyes darting over to the redhead, who was standing with Chester in the kitchen, the two of them talking about layouts and what the countertops were made of as they sipped their drinks. 

“Yeah, we never stay mad at each other for long.” Mike followed Anna’s gaze over to his boyfriend and best friend, a smile tugging at his lips. “I’m glad they’re getting along. Good news about your friend, I hope that all works out.” He looked back at Anna. “I’ll miss you, though. Even though this is awesome, you’ve been a good roommate.” He gently nudged his hip into hers and smiled. 

“Oh, Mike, you act like you’re moving to Africa or something. We’ll still see each other.” She playfully slapped his arm with a giggle, her mood light from the alcohol that was already kicking in. “And who knows, maybe one of these days I’ll be ready to go out on a double date with you and Chester sometime.” 

“Now _that_ would be fun,” Mike said, turning toward the kitchen. “Ches? How long until pizza? I’m starving.” 

Chester checked his phone. “Anytime now according to -” but he stopped the moment he heard a knock on the front door. “Speak of the devil!” he laughed as he set his drink down and headed for the door. He’d already paid for it over the phone, so all he had to do was grab the boxes, thank the delivery person, and then it would be time to pig out. His stomach was already rumbling, and just before he got to the door, he felt a rush from the alcohol hit him. He stopped, gaining his balance for half a second. Drinking on an empty stomach was never good. 

He opened the door to see a young man about his age on the other side. “Hey,” Chester said, plastering on a smile. He could already smell the cheese, peppers, sausage and onions that were hiding inside the two large boxes the guy was holding. 

“Okay,” the guy said as he looked down at the white ticket on the top box, “I’ve got one large supreme - no mushrooms, and one plain cheese.” 

Chester nodded. “That’s right.” He went to take the boxes, and as he did the delivery boy smiled at him. 

“It’s a nice place you got here,” he commented before his blue eyes zeroed in on the spiked collar around Chester’s neck. “I like your collar. That’s really awesome,” he said, his voice dropping an octave. 

The tone of the pizza guy’s voice caught Mike’s ear and he took a step toward the front door, his body loose and warm from the alcohol. It sure did sound like this pizza guy was flirting with his boyfriend.

“Thanks,” Chester said, briefly smiling back, before the guy nodded at him. “Is there anything else?” Chester asked, since the guy hadn’t turned to leave. “I already paid for them.” 

“Oh, no, nothing else,” the guy said, his cheeks blushing slightly before he raised his hand and said goodbye, wishing Chester a good night and finally turning to go. 

Chester let out a little chuckle as he shut the door and headed back toward the kitchen. He was ready to rip open the boxes and eat everything. Or most of everything. He did have guests who were hungry too, he supposed. 

As Chester set the boxes down, Mike reached out and wrapped his fingers around Chester’s wrist, tugging him over. He met the question in Chester’s eye with a scowl. “What was all that about?” he asked, trying to keep his voice low and out of earshot of his friends. 

Dave leaned his back against the counter and watched Mike as he grabbed his boyfriend, thinking he looked a little aggressive. He looked over at Anna, who was also watching the couple. 

Chester shook his head, his eyes darting over to their guests for a second. “What are you talking about?” He went to pull away from Mike’s hold on him, but his boyfriend wasn’t letting go.

“The pizza guy. He was hitting on you.” Mike frowned, his eyes drifting down to the collar that had apparently started the whole conversation with the pizza guy. “It’s this. I can’t let you wear this out in public if it’s going to have people trying to take you away from me.” He pulled on the collar quickly and looked at Chester. “Turn around.” 

Chester was frozen, his dark eyes locked with Mike’s. His fists clenched for a second as he prepared to snap back at his lover, but before he could he saw something move in his preferrial vision. He looked away from Mike long enough to see Dave and Anna staring at them. Chester took a hard swallow before he said, “You’re getting worked up over nothing,” and turned around like he was told. His eyes dropped to the dark floors a second later. He didn’t want to see Mike’s friends looking at him like they were. 

Without another word, Mike took the collar off Chester’s neck and handed it to him. “Here, I think you should go put this away.” 

Chester hesitated for a moment before he let out a sigh and took the collar. He turned around and headed for the stairs in silence. 

Mike didn’t even register the way Anna and Dave were staring at him as he released a sigh of relief and opened the lid of one of the pizza boxes to check it out. “I’m starving,” he said, inhaling the scent of hot, delicious pizza. He dropped the lid back in place and started toward the cabinet to get plates, but stopped as soon as he met Anna’s eyes. “What?”

“What?” she hissed, her eyes darting up to the loft bedroom before she crossed her arms. “What was that, Mike? That whole, awful thing just now?” she asked, her voice never going above a whisper as she shook her head in disbelief. She’d never seen anything like that up close and in person, and she had never seen her friend act so controlling over anyone. 

Dave nodded, adding in his two cents. “What’s wrong with you, man? Chester has zero control over someone flirting with him. He didn’t do anything wrong, you’re way over reacting.” He glanced at Anna, who was still staring at their mutual friend.

Mike pressed his lips together and shook his head. “All I did was take that collar off of him, that’s what that pizza guy was looking at. So what? I don’t want anyone looking at him like that.” He honestly didn’t see what the big deal was.

Anna rubbed her forehead for a minute before she said, “Mike, you embarrassed him. The way you were talking to him. The way you -” She stopped herself for a second as she looked up toward the bedroom again, but there was no sign of Chester. She wasn’t sure if he could hear them over the half walls or not. “The way you sounded toward him just now. Mike, that’s not you,” she implored, her harsh whisper turning a little softer. 

Mike glanced up toward the bedroom. _Did I embarrass him? I didn’t even notice, he just did what I asked. Without question._ He looked back at Anna, then at Dave, spreading his hands wide in front of him. “I wasn’t trying to embarrass him. I just. I heard that guy at the door, and he was flirting, I know he was. I can’t let anyone flirt with Chester. He’s, he’s mine.” Mike tilted his head to the side and gave that some consideration. “Do you think that’s weird, that I feel that way?”

There was a split second of silence before Dave said, “whether you meant to or not, I think you did make him feel bad, and he didn’t do anything wrong. He didn’t flirt back.” He knew he was repeating himself, but Mike wasn’t getting it. “You can’t control everyone around Chester, and you have to trust him, you know? He was fine.”

Mike dropped his head and looked at the floor. He couldn’t change the way he felt. He was finished sharing Chester with anyone. Those days ended as soon as he decided he’d be his boyfriend’s porn partner. But he couldn’t tell Anna and Dave that. He couldn’t tell them about the porn, or Mark, or any of the stress and anxiety he’d been through the last several months when Chester left him to go to work. There was nothing he could say to his friends, and he didn’t want to look like an asshole. Anna was right. It wasn’t him at all. 

“Mike,” Anna called softly as she took a step closer to him and touched the sleeve of his shirt, “Chester loves you. There’s no reason to feel insecure. He’s a handsome guy. People are going to flirt with him.” She turned quickly to see Dave nodding. “I know you haven’t had a ton of experience in this realm,” she added gently, “just be careful not to smother him.” 

“I just want to protect him,” Mike said, then stopped. Without context what he’d said sounded ridiculous. “I guess I need to go say something to him. I wasn’t trying to be an asshole.” He looked at Anna and then up at the loft again. “You’re right. It’s all new to me. I love him, too. I don’t want him to be upset.” 

He stepped away from Anna and turned to the cabinet, reaching for plates. “Here. You guys eat, I’m gonna go upstairs for a minute.” 

Anna turned to Dave, and without actually saying anything, they decided they would eat, but they’d do it quickly so they could bid the couple goodnight. Dave stepped forward and took plates for both he and Anna, handing her one, as they watched Mike head across the loft and up the stairs. 

“Man,” Anna whispered, “talk about uncomfortable.” She rolled her lips together in thought. _I hope this works out. If Mike messes things up with Chester because of stuff like this, it would crush him._

Upstairs, Chester sat on the side of the bed, the spiked collar still in his hand as he sat slouched over, his head buried in his arms. He didn’t want to go back downstairs in front of Anna and Dave. His stomach hurt, and the idea of just lying down and going to sleep seemed better than faking a smile and going back down to their guests. 

Mike was quick to climb the stairs, his head still telling him that he hadn’t really done anything wrong. But the moment Chester came into view, he knew he was wrong. He paused at the top of the steps and looked at his boyfriend’s defeated posture, sitting on the edge of their bed, and he felt an immediate pang of regret. “Ches?” he said carefully, his eyes zeroing in on the collar in Chester’s hand. He stepped forward and knelt down in front of Chester, reaching for the collar. It came easily out of Chester’s lax grip. “Babe? I’m sorry. I’m so stupid, I’m sorry I hurt your feelings.” He hesitated when Chester didn’t react to his words. “Ches?” he tried again, placing his hand on Chester’s knee.

Chester looked up, and he could tell by the look on Mike’s face that he really was sorry. “I didn’t know that guy,” he said, his bottom lip trembling a little as he spoke. “He was just the pizza guy. I didn’t. . .I wouldn’t have done anything with him. Don’t you trust me?” 

The pain in Chester’s eyes was too much, and Mike knew he’d really screwed up. He closed his eyes and took in a deep breath, squeezing Chester’s knee. “I do. I do trust you, it’s me. Ever since you told me about your job, I imagine all these stupid things. I try not to, and it’s not you,” he emphasized again. “It’s my brain not being able to understand how you can compartmentalize. It’s why I’m going to be at YRS now, I can’t stand the thought of you with anyone else. I know you didn’t know that guy, I don’t know what happened. I just heard the way he was flirting with you, and all I could think was, no! Leave him alone, he’s _my_ boyfriend, _mine._ You didn’t do anything wrong, I’m just a mess. I’m sorry,” he said again, stopping for a breath. “I’m sorry.”

Chester knew what was coming next. If there wasn’t already, there would be tears flowing down Mike’s cheeks soon. Chester put his hand on top of Mike’s, cupping it. “I know it sucks,” he said. “I know everything about what I have to do right now sucks, but Mike you can’t flip out on me like that.” He paused, looking toward the stairs. “Not in front of people. They were looking at me funny. . .if you’re worried about something, we can talk in private, okay?” He took his other hand and stroked it through Mike’s blue hair. “I mean, I kinda like you being all possessive of me,” he added with a hint of slyness in his voice. “Usually people don’t care enough to be possessive. Usually I’m not worth that kind of time. But maybe bring it down a few notches when other people are around,” he suggested, letting his fingers fall down to one of Mike’s ears and tapping his earring affectionately.

“I’m sorry,” Mike said again, blinking hard. “I’m sorry if I embarrassed you, I just thought that getting you out of this -” he held up the collar, “would be the fastest way to solve the problem. I love it on you, and I thought I wanted you to wear it all the time, but I don’t. I only want this for me.” He reached over and placed the collar on the bed, then lay his head down on Chester’s thigh, reaching both arms around his boyfriend and looping them together in the back. “And don’t tell me you aren’t worth me worrying over or protecting. You’re my whole world, Ches. I love you so much.” He turned his face into Chester’s leg to hide his eyes. 

Chester ran his hand down Mike’s head, onto his neck, and then onto his back. “I love you, too, Sexy Boy,” he cooed before he bent down and kissed Mike on his head. “I think, I think I was really lonely before I met you, and I don’t feel that way anymore. I can’t imagine the future without you in it.” 

Just as Mike looked up, they heard Anna call from downstairs. “Mike! Chester! Dave and I are going to head out! It’s getting late and we both need to get home!” 

Reluctantly, Mike freed his arms from around Chester and stood up, pressing a quick kiss to his forehead. “Stay here,” he whispered, then made a face. “If you want,” he amended. “I can let them out.”

Chester smiled up at him. “I can stay,” he said, and as Mike headed down the steps, the pressure in the room seemed to lift. Chester took in a long breath, just the feeling of that alone felt good. He could hear Mike walking his friends out. He caught a few _thank yous_ and a _I’m sorry_ before the door opened and then shut. They were alone now, it was safe to go back downstairs where the food was. Then they could sit and talk this out a little more. Or maybe not. _Maybe I should just let it go. He won’t do it again. He just lost himself for a minute. It’s nothing to freak out over._

Mike made his way to the pizza boxes and grabbed himself and Chester a few slices, glancing around at the organized chaos that was their shared living space. _I can’t mess this up. I can’t lose him. I meant it when I said he’s my whole world. He’s everything._ He carried the plates and a couple of napkins and headed for the stairs. _Pizza in bed. That should help fix things. Ches loves to eat in bed. Just not pancakes._ Mike rolled his eyes and smiled to himself. One day... one day they would eat pancakes in bed.

****  
TBC


	26. A Friendly Favor

The moment Chester heard his phone ringing, his eyes shot open. His blurry vision quickly focused on his cell phone sitting on the nightstand. He reached for it, holding it over his head, looking at it with one eye open as his pupils adjusted to the bright morning sunlight. 

Ryan’s name was on the screen, and Chester quickly slid his finger across the accept button. “Hello,” he said quietly, his head still on the pillow as he laid on his side. Mike was behind him, his arm thrown over Chester’s side underneath the thin red and black flannel top sheet they’d been sleeping under. 

“Chaz, you're not sleeping are you? Shit, man, it’s early. I’m sorry.” 

Chester shut his eyes. “No, it’s okay,” he said, still keeping his voice low. “Everything okay?” 

“No,” Ryan stated immediately. “Jay just called me and he’s dying to get away from Mark.” 

Chester’s eyebrows furrowed together before he let out a sigh. “Ry, just hang on a minute, okay?” 

“Sure.” 

Chester pulled his phone away from his ear and hit the mute command. He set it on the nightstand before he laid back down. He let out another long breath as the silence surrounded him. It was Wednesday morning, and it was early. There was no need to be getting up, but he knew his friend needed to talk and vent. 

He twisted a little, trying to catch a glimpse of his boyfriend’s face; Mike was still fast asleep. His lips were parted just a little as he snored softly and Chester smiled. He gently picked Mike’s arm up and off his side, before he scooted away from him, swinging his legs off the side of the bed. He yawned and stretched his arms, scratching his nails over his side and then his shaved head before running them through his flat mohawk. His back ached a little as he twisted from one side to the other. 

He stole another glance at the clock, and the early morning hour before he took the red pair of underwear and matching red and white pajama bottoms from the nightstand, pulling them on one at a time as he stood up. He gave Mike one last look; he’d grabbed a pillow in Chester’s place and was snuggling with it like it was made of flesh and bone. _He’s so cute._

Despite the awkward event that had happened between Chester and his lover the night that Anna and Dave had helped them move the rest of Mike’s things into the loft, the couple had made their amends, and for the most part, Chester felt like things had gone back to normal. Mike had been more attentive over the last few days, but other than that, life had gone on as if nothing had happened. 

Chester grabbed his phone and headed down the stairs. He clicked the phone off mute and said, “Ry, I gotta pee and them I’m all yours. Just hang on.” He didn’t wait for his friend to agree before he muted the phone again. He left it on the kitchen bar and headed to the bathroom to take care of first-thing-in-the-morning business. 

Three minutes later and Chester felt like a new man. He’d managed to pee, wash his face and brush his teeth in record time, and now he was ready to make coffee while he listened to whatever Ryan was upset about. 

“Okay, go,” Chester said, when he took his phone off mute again. He balanced the phone between his shoulder and his ear, as he maneuvered around the kitchen, fixing the coffee pot up. 

“It’s Jason,” Ryan said, his voice not quite a whimper. Yet. “They got back from their romantic weekend.” Ryan’s snide tone didn’t take Chester by surprise. “And now Jason’s going crazy. He said Mark did nothing but pick on him the whole last day they were in Malibu or wherever it was they went. . .and he’s upset. He needs a break and we haven’t seen each other since last week. Mark’s such a dick. I hate him.” His last words came out in a huff. 

Chester turned the coffee maker on before he took a step back and leaned against the counter. “I second that. He’s a royal dick. We all hate him,” he muttered as the older man’s face popped into his mind, and Chester shuddered. The maniacal quality of Mark’s gray eyes, his honey sweet voice and the way he always seemed to word things just right to get anyone and everyone to do exactly what he wanted - it was too much. 

Chester shut his eyes and shook his head, trying to send away the image. “So why don’t you and Jason go out? Somewhere other than YRS.” 

“We’ve tried that before,” Ryan replied dryly. “Last time, Mark started asking questions. The wrong kind of questions,” he said, his tone dropping. “Chaz, if he ever finds out about us, like, if he finds out before we’re ready to get out of there, God, I don’t even want to think about it. But I hate not being able to spend real time with Jay. I’d love for us to actually be able to go out on a date. A real date. . .dinner and movie. You know, something cheesy. Something cliche. Is that so much to ask for?” 

Chester’s eyes drifted up toward the lofted bedroom as the coffee percolated behind him, sending the glorious aroma of the dark nectar through Chester’s senses. “No, I don’t think that’s too much to ask for. And it’s not cheesy. What if you guys go somewhere outside the city?” 

“Jay won’t,” Ryan answered immediately. “He’s scared to death that anywhere we go, somehow Mark will find out. He’s paranoid, and I can’t say I blame him. It just really sucks. There’s nowhere safe for us to go.”

“What about here?” Chester offered without too much thought. “You guys could come here and have like an at-home date. I’ll cook,” he decided quickly as his mind raced forward. He spun around, opening his cabinets and scanning the shelves. “I can make us a big meal and we’ll watch a movie. We can even go for a walk on the beach after it gets dark. Come on, Ry, you don’t get much more cliche than that.” 

“What, you mean like a double date? With you and Mike?” 

Mike. 

Crap. 

Chester looked up toward his bedroom again. He knew his boyfriend wasn’t the biggest fan of Ryan, but this was different. This would be Ryan and Jason both, and somewhere in Chester’s head he justified it. Not only was he helping out his friend, but Mike had brought his friends over to the loft - Anna and Dave - and that had been okay, so he figured this should be okay too. 

“Yeah,” he finally said. “It will be like a double date.”

“You sure Mike will be okay with that? He gives me the evil eye sometimes.” 

Chester waved his hand through the air. “He’ll be fine. Don’t even worry. I’ll talk him into being cool with it. How about tonight?” he offered next as the idea of throwing a little dinner party and hosting his friends - Jason wasn't really a friend, but he’d count for this - really started to excite him. He’d have to go shopping to get supplies, and then he and Mike could spend the day getting everything ready. 

He glanced over the loft. They had been steadily working on finding a place for all of Mike’s things, and Chester was rather proud of the progress they’d made. The dresser was upstairs, and was packed to the gills with Mike’s clothes, and everything that wouldn’t fit, they’d squeezed into the linen closet in the bathroom. They had rearranged the living room a little bit, and had made a space in the far corner for all of Mike’s art supplies - his crates full of paint cans, his extra canvases, his works in progress and they had even gone out and bought a sleek, modern looking desk so Mike could sit and draw, and have a place for his jars of paintbrushes and stash of markers, pencils, and pens to sit. His boyfriend loved the space, and Chester had even grown to enjoy watching him utilize it in his spare time. Even Mike’s piles of music books and compositions were tucked away inside the desk drawers, and so the loft was back to looking clean and organized. Breathable. 

“Thanks, Chaz,” Ryan said, his down voice picking up into something hopeful, even excited. “I’ll call Jay and see if he can get away tonight. I’ll text you if we can come. Thanks again,” he offered before they both said their goodbyes. 

Chester stared at his phone for a minute before he looked up. _Now I just gotta get Sexy Boy on board._

Upstairs, Mike was slowly becoming aware that his arms were not around his boyfriend. Without opening his eyes, he reached over, his hand fumbling across the sheets in search of Chester’s back, his arm, his side, anything. He cracked his eyes open to gauge just how far away Chester was so he could get a hand on him and bring them back together, but his blurry gaze landed on the empty bed. Mike shot upright, his hand groping at the night stand for his phone. “Ches?” he called out, his voice raspy from hours of non-use as he grabbed his phone. “Ches? Where are you?” 

He felt the start of a panic rising in his chest as he scanned the bedroom. _He didn’t wake me up. I knew he was still upset from the other night. I’m such an idiot, I screwed up and now he’s second guessing everything. He thinks this is too much, and I have too many clothes and paint in his space, and he’s wishing I’d never moved in here because I can’t control myself around a pizza guy._

Mike threw back the sheet and stood up, and the minute his feet hit the floor his brain registered the smell of coffee, the rich aroma of the dark roast Chester loved wafting over the half wall. He took a deep breath and called down into the living space, “Babe? You down there?” 

Chester was just pouring himself a cup of coffee when he heard his boyfriend calling down from the bedroom. “Yeah!” he hollered as he looked up. “Just getting coffee!” He waited a moment, and in that time he considered pouring Mike a cup as well, but he didn’t. If Mike wanted coffee, he’d come downstairs. _He might roll over and go back to sleep. It’s still fuckin’ early._

He walked over to the couch, and plopped himself down as he grabbed the remote. It had been awhile since he’d been up so early, and a quiet few minutes while he sipped coffee and caught the morning news, seemed like a good way to waste the time. _And if Mike gets up, we’ll talk about Ryan and Jason coming over._ He checked his phone, but his co-worker had yet to text him with a definite yes or no for dinner and a movie later. 

The sound of Chester’s voice was comforting, even if he was yelling upstairs. The fact that he was still there, still in the apartment, still making coffee like any normal day, calmed Mike’s racing nerves. He shoved a hand through his messy hair and started down the steps, his bare feet making a small slapping sound as he walked. A sleepy smile drifted over his face as he spotted Chester on the couch, coffee in hand. He glanced over the coffee table and didn’t see a cup for himself. “Morning, babe. Why are we up so early?” he asked, running a hand along the top of Chester’s head on his way to the kitchen. 

“My phone woke me up. I was hoping it didn’t wake you up,” he answered, twisting to watch as Mike took down a coffee cup from the cabinets. “It, uh, it was Ryan. I guess Jason and Mark are back from their romantic getaway, which didn’t turn out to be so romantic.” He waited a moment to see if Mike would say anything, and when he didn’t Chester cleared his throat and went on. “I guess they’ve been arguing and Jason is needing a break and he hasn’t seen Ryan all this time. I told them they should go out on a date. A real date. Not just sneaking around at YRS.” 

Mike didn’t even look in Chester’s direction as soon as he heard Ryan’s name. _It’s kinda early for him to be calling here. Too early. But if I say anything right now, Chester will get defensive about it. It’s not worth arguing over._ He poured himself a cup of coffee and headed back toward the couch, his teeth worrying over his bottom lip as he walked. “That… sounds like good advice,” he finally said, looking over the edge of his cup at his boyfriend as he took a sip. “Don’t they ever go out?”

Chester picked up his coffee, his leg folded on the couch as he sat looking at his lover. “Not really. They’ve tried a few times, but Mark usually stops them. He’ll start asking questions or Jason will get paranoid and call it off. It’s, it’s sad.” His eyes dropped to the white fabric of the couch, his free hand dragging across it. “I, invited them to come here,” he said, his eyes closing for a second before he looked up. “I told them I could cook a meal and we’d eat and watch a movie. Like a double date,” he said with a flip of a smile crossing his face. “I hope that’s okay. I kinda offered spur of the moment.” 

The cup of coffee was halfway to Mike’s lips again when Chester spoke the words “double date.” Mike froze and looked at his boyfriend. “Double date? With your boss? And your, your... “ He trailed off, not knowing how to describe Ryan. Friend seemed too innocuous. Ex-partner sounded like he wanted to start a fight, which he didn’t. 

Chester watched as his lover stumbled over his words. “Yeah,” he said, saving Mike from himself for the moment. “I know that’s weird. But, I feel for them. Even though Jason’s my boss, I know he takes a lot of crap from Mark. Like we all do.” He dropped his eyes to the side, looking at their coffee table and the three or four magazines that were sitting there along with a coffee table art book Mike had added to the bunch. “And he’s Ry’s boyfriend, so he’ll be here as a boyfriend, not a boss.” He looked back at his coffee, taking a seriously long sip. _He doesn’t like the idea. I shouldn’t have offered. I should have talked to him first._ “I’m sorry,” he said compulsively as his thoughts spiraled down. “I shouldn’t have offered before I talked to you about it, but Ryan sounded so upset and desperate and I just wanted to help.”

The coffee cup drifted down to Mike’s leg as though it were made of lead. He could see the concern in his boyfriend’s eyes, and he knew his response was critical. It didn’t matter if he liked Ryan or not, or if he wanted to be around Jason at all. What mattered was Chester’s big heart. What mattered was Jason and Ryan had already been invited over, and saying no now would make him look like an asshole. What mattered was the inevitable disappointment he’d see on Chester’s face, or the fight that would follow if he said no. He looked at the top of Chester’s bowed head, at the soft, red tipped hair he loved to touch, the tip of his nose and his ears that were showing, and he said, “no, don’t be sorry. It was a nice thing you offered, Ches. I’m just surprised. And honestly, a little uncomfortable. But… I guess I have to figure out how to be around your coworkers. They’re gonna be my coworkers too.” Mentally, Mike slapped himself. _That sounds stupid. I don’t have to work with them, not like Chester. He and I are only going to work with each other. Ryan won’t even matter, and Jason, how can anyone be friends with their boss?_

Chester looked up, meeting Mike’s eyes as he smiled. “It won’t be bad, you’ll see. And you’re right, you’re going to be around them a lot now. Well, maybe not so much Ryan, but you’ll be around Jason. He does most of the camera work, so maybe this will be a good thing,” he suggested with a shrug. “It will help you be a little more comfortable if you see him outside of work.” 

Before Mike could answer, Chester’s phone jingled with a text message. He read it quickly before he announced that it was Ryan, and that he and Jason would be over tonight for the double date. 

Chester took another sip from his coffee, his eyes darting back and forth in thought before he stood up and headed for the kitchen. “I’m going to go get dressed,” he stated, his free hand running over his naked stomach as he sat his coffee cup in the sink and headed back toward the living room area. “I want to get to the store. I’m going to make a glazed ham,” he said, spreading his hands out in front of him in excitement. “And some sort of potato and a vegetable. It’s going to be good.” He licked his lips just at the thought. “I haven’t figured out dessert yet, but I got time for that.” 

“Ham? That does sounds good,” Mike agreed, his stomach agreeing. He watched Chester as he climbed the stairs. “I want to tag along, but I’ve got to eat something first. Do you have time to wait for me, or do you need to get this magical ham going? How long does it take to make a ham?”

“You’ve got time!” Chester hollered from upstairs. “I haven’t eaten either. Oh! Oh! Sexy Boy, we should go out for breakfast!” Chester rushed back down the stairs, almost tripping on the last step as he hit the living room. “We should go out. We never go out for breakfast,” he said, half out of breath, his cheeks flushed a little. 

Mike was still sitting on the couch, finishing his coffee. “I love breakfast. And you’re right, we never go out for breakfast. I’m surprised we ever manage to even eat breakfast, since we’re always occupied in the mornings.” He flashed Chester a teasing smile. “Well, most mornings. Anyway, let’s do it. Did you have a place in mind? Because all I know is I want a waffle. A big fluffy Belgian waffle with powdered sugar and strawberries, and syrup and bacon.” The image of the breakfast he was describing caused Mike’s mouth to water in anticipation. 

Chester rubbed his flat stomach. All of that sounded good. “I don’t know,” he admitted before he ran a hand over his flat mohawk. “I gotta get ready. We can decide on the way or Google something,” he suggested before he turned and headed back up the stairs. “And then we’ll go to the store! For ham and lots of stuff! We’re hosting, so gotta stock up on everything!” 

“I guess I need to get dressed, too.” Mike looked down at his plaid pajama pants absently. _So much for staying in and laying around today. We went from no plans to breakfast and a dinner party, and I wasn’t even awake._ He sighed and stood up, walking his cup to the kitchen. “I’ll be up in a minute, I’m gonna brush my teeth and get out of your way. I know how long it takes you to fix your hair.” His eyes caught Chester’s from across the room. _He looks absolutely excited about all of this. I’m going to have to try hard when it comes to Jason and Ryan. I don’t want to ruin this for him._ “Give me five minutes, okay?” 

“Okay,” Chester agreed. “And I don’t take that long. I mean, only as long at it takes,” he said as he pulled at his mohawk. “Maybe I should just shave it off. That would cut down on my bathroom time.” 

“WHAT?” Mike said from across the room. “I take it back. Take all the time you want in the bathroom, Ches, I’ll never mention it again.” He fluttered a hand in the air and shook his head. “Don’t you dare.”

Chester grinned, scraping his top teeth over his lip ring for a second as he watched his boyfriend squirm. “But think of all the money we’d save on hair care products,” he said, adding an extra dose of excitement to his voice. “It could be fun!” 

Mike took a few steps toward Chester, narrowing his eyes as he went. “Okay, yeah, you’re right. You shave yours, I’ll shave mine.” He smirked as he watched his lover’s eyes widen. “Don’t test me. I’d do it.”

Chester tried to keep himself from gasping, but it didn’t work. “That’s not fair,” he said as he closed the space between them, his hand reaching for Mike’s blue hair. “I love this. It’s so, so, you!” He ran his hand down Mike’s head and onto his neck, stopping to tease his earring for a second. 

With a triumphant smile, Mike leaned forward and planted a kiss in the middle of Chester’s forehead before he skimmed a hand over his flat mohawk. “And this is so you. And I love it, so you do what you need to do in the bathroom, and I’ll shut up about it.” Before Chester could say anything else, Mike pulled away and started for the bathroom. “Like I said, I’ll be quick. Love you, babe.” 

“Mhm,” Chester said as he darted after his lover, and smacked him quickly on the ass before he bolted back toward the stairs. “And I love you!” he cheered with a giggle. It was going to be a good day, he could feel it. 

****

Jason closed his eyes and took a deep breath in, letting it out slowly. He could feel his heart racing, his stomach nervous with anticipation. It might not be the best circumstances he could think of, but he was going to spend the evening with Ryan tonight, and all he had to do was get out the door.

He felt his hands clench into fists involuntarily and he opened his eyes to catch his own gaze in the mirror. The sparkle of excitement was hard to mask, and he knew that he had to try harder. Mark would read him as easily as a children’s book, and like so many times before, he’d be held hostage at home with his husband. The last place he wanted to be.

It hadn’t always been that way. When he’d first come to YRS as an eighteen year old model, Mark was something mysterious. The man in charge, the boss calling the shots, the older man that doted on him and provided glitzy vacations, gave him a place to live, and gave him the attention he craved. Jason had fallen under Mark’s spell quickly; Mark had found in Jason someone he wanted, and he’d pulled the younger man away from being the subject of the filming and put him behind the camera to learn the business. Mark’s admiration for him had grown when he realized just how shrewd of a businessman Jason was as well. Add to that the favoritism he was showed by the boss, and it all felt an awful lot like love as he turned twenty and said yes to marriage. Committed his life to a man who would go on to tire of him in every aspect but the business. Even in the bedroom, where they had initially clicked, Mark had long since abandoned their vows in favor of the younger boys. He couldn’t pretend it didn’t hurt, even when he lied and claimed they were in an open marriage, that Mark could do as he pleased. Seeing him come out of bedrooms that were not theirs, knowing he’d been fucking someone else, still burned Jason even if he was now truly in love with someone else. It had been a long time since he’d considered himself in love with Mark.

Twenty. They’d been married five years now and Jason still couldn’t comprehend how it had gone sour so fast, or how he’d failed to see Mark’s true colors when they were just dating. Since they were married there had been an endless parade of boys he’d watched come and go when their contracts were up and they could finally run far from Mark’s reach. 

And then there was Ryan.

Somewhere in the midst of Mark’s continuous straying, he’d found himself drawn time and time again to the comfort of their blossoming friendship. It was a friendship he’d felt was borderline inappropriate as one of Ryan’s bosses, but they understood each other on a deeper level. Their conversations were meaningful and treasured, even though Jason was unwilling to go beyond their friendship for something more. But he remembered that one night while Mark was exerting his power over one of his employees in a bedroom down the hall - the night that Ryan had boldly stated that Mark was an asshole and Jason deserved better, the night he’d made the first move and taken Jason’s lips in a kiss that still set his blood on fire when he thought about it. The rest had fallen into place as though it had been destined that way, and Jason could never say no. 

_And it would be perfect, except for Mark. I can’t get away from him. And even if I could, I couldn’t leave Ryan here, with him. When we leave, we leave together._ They’d talked it over so many times, but leaving still seemed so far away. Just getting away for a date was nearly impossible. But not tonight. Tonight he was going to Chester’s, and there was no way Mark could tell him no. His excuse was ironclad.

He ran a hand over the front of his dark red dress shirt and down over his dark jeans. It would have to do. Anything more would have Mark questioning why he was dressed up just to go talk with Chester and Mike about the upcoming weekend. Mike’s first shoot. It was a perfect excuse to go over to the loft for a while. As he was rolling up his sleeves, he heard the bedroom door open, and Jason caught the panicked look on his face in the mirror. He had to calm down or he’d never get out the door. Mark would sniff out the truth if he wasn’t careful.

Mark stepped into the master bedroom, his white dress shirt unbuttoned, his belt already halfway off as he went. He pulled it completely free and lazily laced it around one hand as he stepped into the doorway of the master bathroom. He waited a moment, watching as his husband fussed with his dark hair in the mirror. “So tell me again what your plan is for the evening?” 

Jason kept his eyes on his hair and away from Mark’s reflection. “I’m heading over to Chester’s for a bit. Apparently Mike is having some second thoughts about coming back here, and Chester needs some help talking him down… and through what’s going to happen at their first shoot.” He reached for the tap and turned on the water, rinsing his hands off and then picking up the gray hand towel next to the sink. As he dried his hands, he turned toward Mark. “I figured it would be best for me to deal with it. You and I have already discussed how Mike doesn’t like you.”

Mark pursed his lips together, right into a thin line. “That won’t last,” he announced. “And if this is going to work, he’s going to have to come around and see the light and recognize what a great guy I actually am.” He took a step into the bathroom, and planted himself right behind Jason. He was taller than his husband, and could see over his head and into the bathroom mirror. “Maybe you shouldn’t go over there. It might be better for us to invite Mike and Chester out somewhere. We’ll take them out to a fine restaurant. Really turn their heads. Impress them.” He gingerly placed a hand on Jason’s shoulder. “What do you say to that?” 

Inside, Jason could feel the anxiety grip his stomach. It was always like this. No matter what plan he came up with to get away, Mark managed to outwit him. There was no way he was cancelling on Ryan this time. It had been far too long since they’d seen each other, thanks to the romantic getaway stunt Mark had pulled last weekend. “I say you’re reading Mike all wrong if you think a nice restaurant is going to win him over. He may be naive but he’s not stupid.” 

Mark squeezed Jason’s shoulder before he slid his thumb up his neck, just below his ear. “You’re probably right. Guess you caught me,” he said, bending down to whisper. “I just don’t want to be alone tonight. Thought we’d finish our little romance and stay in. All the boys are gone, it’s just us.” 

“All of them?” Jason asked, a little desperation creeping into his voice. He had to make that go away. “You sent everyone home? You never do that.”

“It wasn’t exactly on purpose,” Mark admitted with a shrug. “More like coincidence. But either way, we have the whole house to ourselves. How often does that happen?” He pressed his lips to Jason’s ear before wrapping an arm around his waist. “You’re starting to worry me. . .don’t you want to stay here and we can have a night alone?” 

Nothing Jason could think of to get out of staying home sounded compelling enough. As his mind cast around frantically for ideas, he closed his eyes and tried to breathe calmly. Short of having a huge fight, there was no way out. He was just desperate enough to allow that to happen, even if he was a little afraid of Mark. With nobody at the house to hear them, fighting could be a critical mistake, but he decided to go for it anyway. “It’s been years since you cared enough to want to spend a night alone with me.” The words came out as barely a whisper, and Jason was afraid maybe he hadn’t said them at all. 

Mark stood up straight, his gentle thumbing of Jason’s neck stopping immediately. He glared at his husband’s reflection in the mirror. “That seems dramatic, considering we just got back from a full-blown romantic weekend together just a few days ago.” 

“Yeah? And what prompted that anyway? The fact that I’ve stopped begging you to leave the boys alone and pay attention to me? You decided to get my attention?” Jason’s eyes popped open and he caught Mark’s furious expression in the mirror. His desperation to leave for the evening had loosened his mouth too much. 

Mark stood his ground, his words coming out more like a growl as he said, “Don’t be such a child. You know how our relationship works. I don’t know what’s gotten into you,” he said, his fist with the belt wrapped around it tightening, “but you can drop it right now. And take this shirt off,” he ordered as he pulled at one of Jason’s sleeves, tugging it hard to one side. “You’re not going anywhere.” Before his husband could say anything, Mark turned and headed back into the bedroom. That was it. Jason was staying home, and whatever issue Chester was having with getting his little boyfriend to join YRS, well, they’d figure that out later. 

Jason looked down at the floor, disappointment crashing over his head. He never knew the right thing to say, and he never won an argument with Mark. One hand reached to fumble over the sleeve of the other arm and he could still feel Mark’s sharp pull on the shirt. It wasn’t a conscious thought as he went to unroll the cuff and take the shirt off. There was still a part of him that was trained to follow Mark’s orders. But the image of Ryan’s face floated across his mind, and Jason couldn’t bear to text him again and call off their plans. He had to see his lover, he’d let him down too many times.

He lifted his head and watched Mark as he stomped angrily around the bedroom, and he knew what he was in for if he stayed. Gathering his strength, Jason walked out of the bathroom and headed for the door, keeping his eyes on Mark as he widened the space between them. “I’m not going to be gone long. You know as well as I do that there’s a lot on the line with Chester when it comes to Mike. I’m going to go deal with that and I’ll be back, and maybe you’ll miss me enough while I’m gone to treat me like your _husband_ when I get back and not one of your toys.” His words were harsh and bitter, but he’d been holding his unhappiness in for far too long. He shouldn’t have to be miserable and scared of the man he shared his bed with. 

Mark stopped. His head darted around as he stared at Jason. “What was that?” he asked, but he didn’t need his partner to repeat it. He crossed the room in giant steps until he was right in front of the smaller man. “Are you trying to say that I don’t treat you well?” he asked, his hands curled. “What kind of utter bullshit is that?” He wasn’t used to people talking back to him, and especially not Jason. It had been years since the last time Jason had stepped out of bounds, and it was both shocking and infuriating as he watched his husband stand in front of him with a different kind of look in his eyes. Not the usual look of obedience, but a look of defiance. 

Jason took another step toward the door but didn’t turn his back on Mark. “Bullshit? You know what’s bullshit? You sleeping with everyone here when I’m married to you. _Married._ You wanted that and I said yes, and here we are, Mark. I’m supposed to be your equal, not your servant. I’m supposed to have a say in what we do around here. And you tasked me to bring Mike on, and I did it. I did exactly what you wanted, and now I need to make sure it stays done. Like I said, I’m not going to be gone that long. You can go a couple of hours without sex, right?” 

For half a second, Mark didn’t know what to say. He’d never heard Jason sound like that. Ever. Even when he was eighteen and had an acid tongue, it didn’t sound like this. He watched as Jason turned away from him, and headed for the bedroom door. 

Something inside of Mark kicked in and he rushed forward, grabbing Jason by the arm. “Wait!” he ordered, “you’re not leaving. And what’s all this crap about me sleeping around? We’re in an open marriage,” he stated, his fingers digging harder into Jason’s arm. “I don’t know what bug you got up your ass, but you’re staying right here.” 

“No, _you’re_ in an open marriage. You do what you want and there’s hell to pay if I look at someone twice. Let me go.” Jason tried hard to keep the wince from his face as Mark’s grip tightened even more. “I don’t know why we have to fight every time I want to go outside of this house for more than five minutes. I told you where I’ll be and why. What else do you want? Let me go,” he said again, hating himself for the panic he could hear edging into his voice. 

Mark’s gray eyes narrowed. “Have you been looking at someone?” he asked, his grip never loosening. “You’d tell me if there was someone else, wouldn’t you?” He could feel his teeth grinding together. He knew his relationship with Jason had fallen over the last couple of years, but above everything else, they were business partners. They were co-owners of YRS, and Jason knew about all the skeletons in the closets. “Tell me!” Mark demanded, jerking on Jason’s arm, as a thin layer of sweat formed over his neck. 

Before either of them could say more, they heard a voice calling up from downstairs. 

“Mark! Jason! Are you two okay? I heard yelling!” 

It was Brad, and the sound of his voice suddenly broke Mark’s hold on his husband. He’d forgotten that the cook was still in the house, doing his mid-week ritual saging of the kitchen.

For just a second, Jason froze, watching the anger spread over Mark’s face. He’d said too much. “For fuck’s sake, Mark! There’s nobody else!” he hissed, lowering his voice. “How could I ever meet anyone when you keep me here all the fucking time!” He jerked his arm away and turned for the door. “I’ll text you when I’m on my way back,” he said angrily, the place where Mark had grabbed his arm throbbing. He didn’t look back as he practically ran down the hallway and down the stairs, calling into the kitchen, “everything’s fine, Brad, I’m headed out for a while. Mark’s staying here, let me know if you need anything!”

He grabbed his keys off the hook by the back door to the garage and slipped out the door before he even heard Brad’s response, his heart racing. He couldn’t believe what he’d just done, arguing with Mark like that and calling out all of his flaws. The evening with Ryan was definitely worth Mark’s wrath right now, but he wasn’t so sure if he’d be able to take it when he returned home later. 

Once he’d left the property the anxiety and the fear overwhelmed him. There was no way Mark would let him get away with talking to him that way. He’d pushed too far and said too much, and it was only a matter of time until Mark figured out that Jason was up to something behind his back. Even as he put miles between them, Jason couldn’t help but feel that he’d completely fucked everything up. 

****

Chester had just put the ham back in the oven, the smell of the sweet brown sugar glaze and onions still blasting over his face as he turned around and pulled his lobster claw oven mitts off. “It’s almost done,” he announced, glancing at the clock on the wall. “And just in time, too. They should be here any minute.” 

“It smells good,” Mike agreed from his desk in the living area. “I’m just about finished here. You still don’t need my help?” He looked down at the scene he was shading with his colored pencils and picked up a different green to finish his work. “I feel like I’ve been pretty useless this afternoon.” 

Chester glanced over his stove top. His pot of green beans were finished, and his sour cream and chive potatoes were fork tender and creamy. No, there really wasn’t anything his boyfriend could do to help. The table was already set, and the kitchen was as clean as it was going to be until everything involving food was done. But then he heard the downtrodden sound of his lover’s voice, and he turned around, looking across the loft. Mike had his head hung, his styled blue hair making him look more sad than cute at the moment. 

“You haven’t been useless,” Chester said as he put his hands on the countertop. “This place looks amazing, you did a great job getting everything cleaned, and you even made the cake!” he stated, his smile wide as he pointed to the refrigerator, where an iced carrot cake was stashed. Mike had followed the recipe and it was stuffed full of fresh bits of carrots, raisins, and a Cool-Whip icing that tasted heavenly. 

Mike eyed the picture as he replaced his pencils in the case and slipped the paper into a folder, switching off his little lamp as he stood up. “I hope that cake is edible. Thanks for helping me with the carrots. And the measuring. And flouring the pans.” He smiled. “For basically holding my hand through it.” He walked over to the kitchen and looked over the bar at his boyfriend, a teasing tone coming over his voice. “You’re so sexy in the kitchen. I can’t help it if sometimes I feel like you love your appliances more than me.”

Chester cocked his eyebrow. “Well, I do have a certain fondness for my mixer,” he said, trying to keep a straight face, even though, yeah, his mixer was kick ass. “But none of them compare to you.” He reached over, taking Mike’s hand. “And none of them can give me head quite like you either,” he added with a giggle. 

“I certainly hope not,” Mike said as a shudder moved through his body. Kitchen appliances and sensitive areas did not mix. “You’re a mess,” he added decisively, pulling on Chester’s hand. “You got time to come over here before they arrive?” 

Chester licked his lips, his tongue playing with his piercing as he flipped it from one side to the other. “I’m a mess? Oh, you don’t know the half of it,” he said, ready to let go of Mike’s hand and come around to the other side of the bar, but he didn’t get to. Someone knocked on the front door, leaving Chester with slumped shoulders and a little disappointment. “That’s them,” he said as he reached for his oven mitts instead of Mike’s body. “Sexy Boy, let them in, will you?” 

Mike sighed. It would be hours until he’d get the attention he was after. All afternoon they’d been wrapped up in cleaning and cooking, and even though he knew it was silly, he was missing Chester’s undivided attention. He’d only wanted a little kiss before dinner.

“Got it,” he said, moving toward the door. _Even though I don’t want to._ He tried to clear his mind and smile as he opened the door. He still wasn’t sure how this whole evening was going to go down.

Ryan was on the other side, alone, and Mike forced a smile as he opened the door wider. “Hey, Ryan, come on in.” 

Ryan nodded. “Thanks,” he said as he stepped in, and the first thing he noticed was the sweet smell of ham. “Holy crap it smells amazing in here,” he said as he beelined to the kitchen. He shoved a hand through his dark, slicked back hair before he pulled his black leather jacket off. He plopped it onto the back of one of the dining room chairs before he met Chester in the kitchen. “Ham, right?” 

“Glazed ham,” Chester corrected as he set the pan on a cooling pad. He pulled his oven mitts off and turned to face his friend. “Where’s Jason?” 

“He’s coming,” Ryan said as he pulled his phone from his pocket, checking the time and his last text message from his boyfriend. “He’s gotta come from all the way up in the hills, ya’ know.” 

“True,” Chester agreed as he turned back to the stove to pull the foil back from the ham, steaming coming out everywhere. 

Ryan stood back and watched as Chester maneuvered around the kitchen like a professional. He was neat and organized, and Ryan knew better than to get too close to the food before Chester was ready for it to be plated and consumed. He chuckled softly at the thought as he looked his friend up and down. Chester had on white socks with black polka-dots on them, but everything else was black - his jeans, his shirt, even his belt. Ryan looked down at himself. “Hey, Chaz, look,” he said in amusement as he tugged at the front of his shirt, “we have on the same outfit!” 

Chester turned away from the food, just long enough to look Ryan up and down before he smiled. “All black. Guess we’re both being original.” 

Mike had come back over to the bar, resting his elbows on the top as he watched Chester finish up in the kitchen. He glanced between Chester and Ryan and couldn’t help but roll his eyes at Ryan’s observation. _So what. All black, that’s not an outfit. They’re wearing the same color, but Chester looks ten times better in those pants than Ryan ever could._ He glanced down at his soft, comfortable jeans and his dark red and black flannel that was open over a gray t-shirt. It was standard Mike Shinoda attire, and it matched nobody else. 

The amusement in the kitchen died down as Chester went back to attending to the food. Ryan checked his phone again. _Late. He’s late._ He rubbed the back of his neck as he wandered away from the kitchen, aimlessly looking around the loft at the dark cement floors, the high overhead lights, at the couch and television and out the windows where the sun was on its way down. He checked his phone again. _What if he’s not coming? He promised me this time. Maybe something happened._

Chester surveyed his food, and he was happy with it. Now it was time to eat, just as soon as Jason would show up. He spun around, catching sight of Ryan over by the couch. “You did tell him seven, right?” he asked as he watched his friend check his phone. 

Ryan nodded. “I told him. I just sent him a text asking where he is.” He dropped his head as he walked around the couch and sat down, letting out a long sigh. If Jason stood him up again, it was going to be a horrible night. _Tonight was supposed to be ours. It was supposed to be romantic._

“It’s probably just traffic,” Mike offered, feeling a bit of compassion for Ryan as he’d watched him pace the room, then fidget with his phone. He could hear the concern in the man’s voice, and he wasn’t heartless, even if he didn’t care for Ryan. It was hard to not know where someone you love was, he knew all about that.

“Yeah, it’s probably traffic,” Chester seconded, and for a second he looked over at Mike, their eyes meeting. “How about something to drink, Ry?” he asked as he shifted to the refrigerator. “We got soda and tea and beer,” he announced, but the only response he got was a quick ‘I don’t care’. Chester let out a sigh as he grabbed a Sprite and headed toward the couch. He handed the drink over as he stood just in front of his friend. He’d seen this same scene happen way too many times. 

“He can’t stand me up again, Chaz,” Ryan said as he stared at the top of the unopened can. “And the part that really sucks is that I know it’s not his fault. I know he wants to be with me, he just. . .he can’t. I hate that asshole Mark,” he grumbled. 

“I know, but don’t give up hope yet,” Chester suggested, his eyes bouncing from Ryan’s defeated face to Mike, who was still over by the kitchen table. Chester took a deep breath, ready to hand out some more hopeful words, just as someone knocked on the door. Everyone turned to look and Ryan was on his feet immediately, a massive smile scrolled across his lips. 

“I’ll get it!” he offered as he left his Sprite on the coffee table and bounded across the loft as quickly as he could. He hadn’t seen Jason in days, and just the thought of seeing his face - of touching his warm skin and soft hair - was like a rope pulling him toward the door. 

He stopped just short, taking the moment to tug at his t-shirt and make sure his hair was in place before he opened the door, love busting off his face, until he saw Jason on the other side. His boyfriend wasn’t smiling back as he stood practically shaking, his arms crossed like he was hugging himself. “Jay?” Ryan asked, his arms already reaching for the other man. 

“Oh, fuck, I’m glad to see you,” Jason said as he stumbled forward into Ryan’s waiting arms. He slid both hands around his boyfriend’s waist and hugged him close, turning his face into the curve of Ryan’s neck and breathing him in. “I almost didn’t make it out of the house. Again. I’m so sorry I’m late.” He took a deep breath in and tried to calm himself down, but he could feel the nervous energy coursing through him and his knees felt a little weak. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry.”

Ryan had his arms around Jason’s back, their heads pressed together. “It’s okay,” he assured him. “There’s nothing to be sorry about. I know it’s hard.” He looked down the hallway as they stood there, and one of the neighbors was just coming out. “Come on,” he coaxed, “let’s go inside. Chester cooked. We can sit down and eat.”

Jason didn’t argue, and Ryan led the way, shutting the door behind them. He kept his arm around Jason’s waist as they walked. “He made ham and potatoes and beans,” he said, keeping his voice low. 

“Okay,” Jason agreed, not really looking around at the loft or at Mike and Chester. He was relieved to be away from YRS and Mark, and someplace safe enough to really be with his boyfriend and not worry too much about anyone finding out. He wanted to just melt into Ryan’s arms and sleep there in the warmth and comfort. He didn’t say anything else as they sat down on the couch and Ryan grabbed his hand. 

Mike watched Ryan lead Jason in and could tell immediately that something was wrong. The way Jason clung to Ryan’s side, the glazed look in his eyes, it was more than just being late. He didn’t know what to do or say, he barely knew either of them. He looked over at Chester, who was also watching them closely, and he shrugged one shoulder, communicating his reluctance to engage either man in conversation. 

Chester gave Mike one last look before he walked over to the couch. “Everything okay?” he asked, even though he wasn’t sure he wanted to hear the answer. He was pretty sure it had something to do with Mark, he just didn’t know to what extreme. 

“Mark.” Jason let the name sit in the silence between them all for a moment, everyone in the room thinking their own negative thoughts about the YRS owner. “He’s just… he won’t ever let me just leave. And it almost happened again tonight, and I just, I couldn’t, I didn’t want to have to text you, Ry, and tell you I wasn’t coming. So I did something really, really stupid.” He picked at imaginary lint on his jeans as he spoke, avoiding eye contact with everyone. 

Ryan still had Jason’s hand, and he squeezed it gently. “No, you didn’t do anything wrong,” he encouraged. He wanted to say more, but he wasn’t sure if he should. Not here. Not in front of Chester and Mike, even though he was pretty sure at least Chester knew most of what was going on. “He can’t. . .he can’t keep you prisoner there.” 

At the word prisoner, Mike’s attention zeroed in on Jason’s face. He thought about all the house rules and some of the things Jason had said to him when he convinced Mike to sign on at YRS. For the first time he was seeing Jason as someone not completely complicit in what went on at the house. He waited anxiously to hear what Jason had to say in response.

“He wasn’t going to let me go, Ry, he, he had me by the arm. I said some nasty things, he got angry… I should have just shut up, I let him push me too far. And he knows I’m here. I told him I had to come talk to Mike.” Jason lifted his head and looked across the room at Mike. “I’m sorry I dragged you into this, I couldn’t come up with another excuse of why I needed to leave.” He turned his attention back to Ryan. “And now Mark’s thinking there’s someone else because I picked a fight about him sleeping around, and it’s all so bad. So stupid.”

Ryan felt the color run from his face. “He knows about us?” he asked, his stomach twisting with sickness. If Mark found out about their relationship, it would be over before they’d have the chance to leave. He knew Mark would kick him out of YRS and he’d probably never see Jason again. 

“No, no, he doesn’t know. He just freaked when I told him I hated how he treated everyone, and wanted to throw this open marriage concept in my face, but you know that only applies to him. He asked if there was anyone else and I said no, but I feel like he’s going to be watching me now. I shouldn’t have said anything but I couldn’t think of any other way to get out of there. And I wanted to come. I’ve missed you so much.” Jason looked over at Chester. “You’re so good to offer to let us come here, and to cook, too. I didn’t want to ruin your night either.” 

Chester shook his head. “Jason, it’s fine. You guys stay there,” he said, as he reached for Mike’s arm. “We’ll make you guys some plates.” He tugged on his boyfriend’s arm as they moved toward the kitchen. This was bad. Whatever the details were about what had happened with Mark, Chester didn’t really want to hear them. Instead he figured Jason and Ryan might appreciate a few minutes alone, as they sat snuggled on the couch. 

Chester picked up two of the plates from the kitchen table, and Mike did the same. “I’ve never seen him like this,” Chester whispered. “I’m not totally sure what to do.” 

“Just do what you do, babe. Plate the hell out of this food and turn the mood around. I know I always feel better after you feed me, I’m sure it will be the same. It can’t be that bad. Jason said Mark doesn’t know anything for sure. It will be fine,” he whispered back, holding his plates and glancing into the living room.

Chester nodded before he turned his attention back to the food. He sliced up the ham, taking his time as he gave everyone equal slices. He spooned out the beans and the potatoes and made sure to fetch the ketchup from the refrigerator. He looked over all four plates, and smiled. Everything looked and smelled delicious, and the last thing he wanted was to serve cold food. He turned back to Mike. “I think we need beer for this,” he said as he gestured back to their fridge before looking across the loft. “Ry, you guys ready to eat?” he asked, as he carried two plates to the table. 

Ryan turned in his seat as he nodded. “Yeah, I think we’re ready.” He patted Jason’s leg. “Come on, some food will do you good. I know you’ve never had it, but Chester’s a hell of a cook.” 

Mike joined Chester at the table, two beers in each hand. “It’s true. He’s the best out there.” He flashed Chester a proud smile. “I think he’s better than Brad, but he definitely tries to argue me down.”

Jason managed a smile as he stood and followed Ryan to the table, their hands linked together. “Brad’s a tough one to beat,” he said, looking over the table. “I think you’ve definitely got him on presentation, though, Chester.”

The room was quiet as Chester looked at his boss and grinned. “Thanks,” he said before he went to get the last two plates. “Mike says I should go to school for it, but I don’t think I could do the school part. Tests and teachers and homework.” He shivered at the thought before he joined the others at the table. He sat down in his usual place, across from his boyfriend. He met his eyes before he lifted his foot, nudging Mike’s leg. “And I don’t get all the credit. Mike made the cake that’s waiting in the fridge for later.” 

“We’ll see how that turned out later, Ches,” Mike dismissed with a little hint of excitement in his voice. He looked at Ryan, who looked relieved to have Jason beside him, and Jason who still looked troubled, and he swallowed down his pride a little bit. “We’re happy you guys could come over tonight. Let’s eat before it gets cold.” 

 

****

Dinner had gone quickly, and after the kitchen had been cleaned, and more beer had been consumed, it had been decided that a romantic stroll on the beach under the moonlight was a nicer option than watching a movie. 

The moon wasn’t high in the sky yet, but its reflection was on the water, as Mike, Chester, Ryan and Jason walked side by side down the quiet beach. There were other people around, but they were few and far between, most of them night surfers or people on blankets enjoying the warm evening breeze as they star gazed. None of them were interested in the four men and their slow pace along the water’s edge. 

The waves were rolling onto the beach, slow and frothy, keeping the steady sound of the ocean and its salty inhale pleasant. Mike and Chester had both changed into sandals before leaving the loft, and they were walking the closest to the water. Now and again they could feel the splash of water on their feet, or a low spot in the beach would leave one of them with wet sand around their toes, but it was warm, and neither of them minded. 

Chester felt Mike squeeze his hand and he looked over to see his boyfriend’s blue hair reflecting the soft glow of the moon. “I love this,” Chester said, squeezing his hand back before he looked over at Jason and Ryan. The couple held hands while they carried their socks and shoes. “Didn’t I tell you this part of the beach was great?” 

Ryan was the first to answer, as he walked right next to Chester. “It’s amazing. Just beautiful.” 

Mike gazed out over the ocean and smiled slightly. So far the evening had gone well, after the initial tense moments when Jason arrived. He was even feeling a little better about Ryan now, having watched him interact with his boyfriend that evening. It was a huge contrast to the night he’d been drunk in their apartment. He heard Jason agree that the beach was beautiful, and he could hear the relaxation in his voice, and he knew it made Chester happy to be able to provide this time for his friends. 

He felt Chester tug on his hand and he turned to see that they were now walking alone, Ryan and Jason having stopped a few steps back. “Let’s keep going, I wanna get you out here under the stars and kiss you senseless.” 

Chester smiled at the invitation. “Okay,” he agreed as they kept going. “Thanks, Mike,” he offered when they were out of earshot of their companions. “For tonight, I mean. For being cool about everything.” 

“It hasn’t been bad at all,” he confessed, dropping his head to watch their feet. “I feel bad for them, Ches. It must be really hard for them to try to stay off Mark’s radar.” He shuddered at the thought of Mark. “I don’t like him, Chester. Despite everything, Jason seems like an okay guy.” 

“None of us actually like Mark,” Chester said. He glanced over his shoulder to see Ryan and Jason even further back. They weren’t even walking anymore, but standing side by side and looking up at the stars. “Mark is, he’s just part of the job. It’s something you accept and in return, everything else is pretty good.” He paused for a moment, remembering the last time Mark had pulled him aside. The last time he had pushed his boss away, saying he didn’t want to do anything that wasn’t actually YRS _work_. The last time it hadn’t done any good. He pulled Mike a little closer as he let go of his hand, and took him by the arm instead, sucking up his body heat. 

Mike stopped where they were and slid his hands around Chester’s waist, pulling them tightly against each other. He could see Chester’s dark eyes in the moonlight and he ran his lips across his cheek in a quick kiss. “You don’t have to deal with him anymore. I’m going to be there, and I’ll take care of that. You’re totally mine now, nobody else can touch you.” 

Chester nodded as he offered a sad smile. It sounded nice. Just being with Mike sounded wonderful, but something in Chester’s brain told him that would never happen. Mark would never let up, not until Chester’s contract was officially finished. “I hope so,” he said, wrapping his arms around Mike’s neck. “I have zero desire to be with anyone else.” He leaned forward, his lips meeting Mike’s in a soft peck before he pulled back. “It’s funny, you know you’ve only been to YRS once, and you’ve already stood up to Mark more than anyone I’ve ever seen.” 

“Really?” Mike slipped his hands down into the back pockets of Chester’s black jeans and rocked their hips together. “I just want to make sure that you don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do ever again. I love you so much, and I promise you I’m gonna be there until these contracts are up. And then past that. We’re not gonna end there.” He nuzzled his face against Chester’s hair for a second and then caught his earlobe between his teeth, taking a quick, playful nip at it. “I can’t wait for them to leave,” he breathed into Chester’s ear. “I’m glad they’re getting their time together, but I’m ready for it to be just us again.”

Chester’s grin went ear to ear. Everything Mike was saying was perfect, and as he felt his lover’s breath on his skin, a tingle shot through his body. “Mmmmm, Sexy Boy,” he replied, his voice hitting an excited note, “and what do you want to do after they leave?” His fingers were already playing up and down the back of Mike’s neck, knowing he liked it. 

“I want to taste every inch of your body,” Mike said, his tone hungry. “I just want to lay you down and have my way with you. Now that I’ve had a little taste I just want more.” He felt a shiver of arousal run down his spine as Chester’s fingers found his earring, the spot behind his ear that turned him on so much. He caught his boyfriend’s bottom lip and sucked it into his mouth, playing his tongue across the lip ring as he kept their hips aligned. He knew Chester could feel his erection coming to life and he could feel the other man’s as well. It was time for Jason and Ryan to go home. 

Chester moaned inside their kiss. It was all just too much. Between Mike’s encouraging words about the future, and their bodies being pressed together under the moonlight, and now his lover was sucking on his lip ring, and he was in ecstasy. Their lip lock broke, and Chester immediately went to sucking and kissing down Mike’s neck. “You can do anything you want to me,” he said, his whisper coming out husky as he dropped one of his hands to Mike’s hip, his fingers clawing through the belt loops that were there. “It’s been days, which feels like years,” he mumbled, which he hadn’t exactly planned on saying out loud. 

“Sorry… I’m sorry I was an ass the other night. I just can’t stand the thought of you being with anyone else. I’m sorry I get so jealous.” Mike loved the feel of Chester’s damp kisses on his neck. His eyes were closed as he turned his mouth back into his boyfriend’s. Their kiss went slow and deep for a few moments, the sound of the ocean and the wind in the background. It was almost like they were the only two people out on the beach, the feel of Chester’s body and his kiss making Mike forget everything else.

But further down the sand, Jason and Ryan were still there, also lost in their own world together. Whatever it was, the waves, the feel of the sand under his feet, the moonlight, the fact that he was finally alone with Ryan… Jason figured it was a combination of all those things that made him feel so light and happy. He felt free, standing there on the beach with Ryan’s fingers laced through his, right there in front of anyone who could pass them by. Nobody cared, nobody was looking, but it was exhilarating all the same.

“Ry?” he said after a few moments of silence between them. “This is amazing, being here right now. I wish we could do this more often.” 

Ryan turned just enough to plant a small kiss on the side of Jason’s head. “Me too,” he whispered. “You’ll probably think me cheesy, but this is the kind of stuff I daydream about. Just you and me out doing things like this. Or going to the movies, or to an art show. Or a play,” he added as he thought over all the scenarios he kept locked away in his mind. “One day, Jay, we’ll get to do all of it.” 

“I want that. So much. I’m so scared it’s never going to happen. I said a bunch of things tonight I shouldn’t have said. We’re going to have to be careful.” He shook his head, mentally chastising himself for being so careless. “I just wanted to see you so badly. I wanted to be alone with you. Being at Chester’s has been great, but I need you.” Jason looked at Ryan for a second and then down the beach, spotting Chester and Mike, too far away to hear what he was saying. “I’ve got some cash on me, Ry. Why don’t we tell them good night and go get a nice hotel room for the night? My treat. I’ll figure something to say to Mark tomorrow.” 

The thought of being alone with his lover in a nice hotel was something that Ryan had never really considered. The only place they ever got to be truly alone together was at YRS, and even that wasn’t alone. That was under racing heartbeats, and other people close by. That was with Amir or Chester standing guard so they could quickly have time together. On the few occasions they had been able to be out together, their time was always limited, under the fear of Mark finding out. It was the same reason they never went back to Ryan’s small apartment. He had a roommate who never seemed to leave, and the walls were thin, all of which equalled no privacy. 

Ryan pulled Jason around so they were face to face. “I love that idea,” he said before he leaned in, taking a preliminary kiss from Jason’s lips. The night was about to bring so much more, and Ryan didn’t want to waste anymore of it on the beach. He pulled back, his heart already beating a little faster with anticipation. “Let’s go tell them we’re leaving.” 

Jason nodded, a relieved smile crossing his lips. “This is beautiful, but it’s not going to compare to spending the night with you. God, I can’t wait.” He stepped out of Ryan’s arms with a happy sigh, grabbing his hand as he started walking to catch up with Chester and Mike. Once they were within a few steps he could see Mike’s hands possessively in the back pockets of Chester’s jeans as he ran kisses over Chester’s neck. He felt guilty interrupting them. “Chester?” he called, still a few steps away from the couple.

It took a few seconds for it to register in Chester’s mind that someone was calling him, and it didn’t help that Mike hadn’t let him go. He was still pulled tightly up against his boyfriend’s body as Mike’s lips and tongue continued their work. Chester managed to turn his head, just enough to see Jason and Ryan standing not too far away. “Sorry, guys,” he said, a playful giggle mixed with his words as he kept his arm laced around Mike’s neck. “I think we’re good here if you guys want to keep walking.” 

“We’re going to head back, actually,” Jason said, his eyes taking in the picture of Mike and Chester together in the moonlight. They really were going to look good on camera, the thought coming unbidden before guilt followed. It just seemed wrong to exploit what appeared to be a genuinely loving relationship, but he didn’t get to have a say in how that all went down. He dismissed the thought quickly as unpleasant business, and he didn’t want to think about business right now. “I hate to ask you this, as generous as you’ve been tonight,” he started, noting the frustrated look on Mike’s face as he finally stepped back a little bit. 

Mike was more than ready for Jason and Ryan to leave, and he didn’t think twice before he interrupted with, “do you need us to walk you back?” He didn’t know what else there was to talk about. If Jason wanted to leave, that was fine with him.

“No, no, you guys can stay here. We know the way. We just, well,” Jason looked at Chester. “We’re going to spend the night together, and Mark thinks I’m at your place. If he calls looking for me, can you let me know?” He was glad it was dark outside to conceal the shame on his face. Asking his employee to cover for him - again - was something he wished he didn’t have to do.

Chester’s eyes bounced from Jason over to Ryan, who looked like he was on cloud nine. “Sure,” he agreed, even though something nervous was already forming inside of him. If Mark called and got angry or suspicious, the thought of him coming to the loft to search for Jason wasn’t a good one. _If he knows I lied, he’d get pissed at me. He’d. . ._ he swallowed away the thought as he glanced at Mike. _Mike’s here though. We’re stronger when we’re together. Mark wouldn’t do anything._ He nodded slowly, knowing that he couldn’t say no. “Are you sure you don’t need us to walk you back? I locked up the loft, and your guys’ stuff is there. Ry, your jacket is still on the back of the chair,” he said, motioning to his friend. 

“Oh, that’s right,” Ryan realized his hands going to his chest and stomach, like he was making sure he wasn’t actually wearing his jacket already. “Sorry, Chaz, is that okay?” he asked, looking over at Mike for a moment. “We hate to pull you away from this so early.” His blue eyes shot out over the ocean and the breathtaking view of the waves and endlessness. 

Chester waved his hand through the air. “It’s not a problem. We, uh, we wanted to get back anyway.” He cocked a quick sly eyebrow Mike’s way before he offered for Jason and Ryan to lead the way.

The two couples headed back, all of them ready to leave the sandy beach and crashing waves for more carnal pleasures. Chester slid his arm around Mike’s waist as they went. “You know,” he said, leaning close so his lover could hear him, “as soon as they’re gone, I think we need to take a shower together. Wash all this sand off our feet, and we can make sure to clean every other part of each other too.” 

“Perfect,” Mike whispered back, his mind already thinking about running his hands over water and soap slickened skin in the shower. “Too bad I can’t race you back, I might win this time. I want to be home _now._ ”

****  
TBC


	27. Mike's First Shoot

Mark sat back in his desk chair, the slight squeak from his weight, or lack of fine craftsmanship, annoyed him as he laced his fingers together. It was early, but that didn’t stop the work train. There were things to be done, scenes to be shot and film to be edited. The morning sun poured through the far windows, lending an extra amount of light to the darker painted room. The plum color on the walls hadn’t been Mark’s first choice, but over the years he’d grown to appreciate the lack of white and beige in this room. 

He sat for a moment, looking across his desk at Chester Bennington and his newest employee, Mike Shinoda. Both had scripts for their first scene in hand. “As you can see, I kept it simple since this will be your first time, Mike. Very little dialogue to memorize. You seem like a smart boy, I figured you could handle that on the fly.” 

Mike cringed internally as Mark called him ‘boy’. It was demeaning, a way of keeping emotional control over his employees. He didn’t take his eyes off the script as he commented, “yeah. I can do it.”

He glanced over the scene for another second, his mind racing. He still wasn’t sure he wanted to do this, but the overriding emotion was concern for Chester. He couldn’t back out and just leave him alone. Not now. He bit his bottom lip as he read and waited, wondering what other unwritten instructions were coming.

“It’s a very basic scene, which I always think is best for new boys,” Mark said as he sat forward in his chair, his elbows on the desk. “Chester will be able to guide you through most of it.” He gave his senior employee a nod. 

“Sure, it will be fine,” Chester answered as he looked from his boss over to his boyfriend. “Don’t let all this freak you out, most of it is just for visual cues,” he stated as he motioned over his script. 

“That’s right,” Mark agreed. “It’s as much about your actions as it is about camera angles.” He paused for a moment, his gray eyes flashing across the room to the wing backed chair by the bookcase, where Jason was sitting. He had his legs and arms crossed as he sat silently. “Jason will be filming,” Mark continued as he turned his attention back to Mike and Chester, a smile parting his lips. “Along with the cues you give each other, you’ll need to be listening to both mine and Jason’s instructions as well. You’ll need to stay fully present,” he stated, his tone turning a bit more serious. 

Fully present. Mike looked at Chester, for the first time realizing that what they were about to do wasn’t what they did behind the closed doors of their own home. There wasn’t anything romantic or loving about being ordered around in front of cameras, and he felt a sudden wash of shame through his insides. This was what Chester had been trying to tell him since he’d discovered his boyfriend was in the porn business. It was just work. There was nothing else there. It would be different for them in some way, he had to assume, because they _were_ in a loving and committed relationship, but he just didn’t know what to expect all of a sudden. This wasn’t going to be like making love at home. Nothing about this would be like that, except that they would be together. 

He looked back at Mark. “What else do I need to know?” 

“The important thing is communication,” Mark said, folding his hands on top of the copy of the script on his desk. “You’re going to have to let Chester know certain things as you go along, and he’ll do the same. Jason and I can only tell so much from the sidelines, so it’s important the two of you are in sync when it comes to changing positions. This is a short scene, so we’ve only got half a dozen shifts for the two of you.” 

Mark flipped his copy of the script open, as he shoved his dark framed glasses up on his nose. “Opening with Chester on his knees, he’ll suck you first and then you’ll swap.” He stopped as he looking over the top of his glasses at Mike. He had to pull back his chuckle at the redness forming around Mike’s neck and ears. “Porn is all about going back and forth. Partners take turns, Mike. It’s all about sharing.” He looked back down and turned the page, and Mike and Chester turned with him. “Then we’ll move to the couch. We’ll start with Chester again. We’ll put you on the couch and let Mike fuss over you a bit - kisses and groping,” he said, unenthused, “but by that time you’ll both need to be fully stripped.” 

He turned the page and continued with a short clearing of his throat. “Then we’ll put Mike on the couch for fingering. We’ll need some close up shots of that, so be ready for lots of pausing as we get the angles right.” He glanced up at his employees - Chester looked unaffected as he followed along, but Mark could tell that Mike was already not handling this well. He was shifting in his chair, and Mark could see the nervous look on his face, even as he kept his eyes glued to the script. 

“And then we’ll move everything over to the bed. Beds are easier for the first time,” Mark added as he turned the page. “Later on we’ll back off on the amount of location changes, but this will be best for now. Mike, you’ll be on your hands and knees and we’ll get some great shots of Chester fucking you. This is another place we’ll need lots of close up shots, some slow and some fast. Pacing is important.” 

Mike could feel the sweat forming on his upper lip, and his palms were already sweaty. Listening to how the scene was envisioned, how Mark thought it would all play out, Mike realized something else important. Not only would this be nothing like being at home, there was no way he was okay being as exposed as Mark was describing. There was no way he was going to do anything but be in control of the scene, and that meant he had to be the one doing the fucking, not the other way around. Not the way Mark wanted it, but the way he was willing to do it.

He cleared his throat and stole a quick glance at Chester. They hadn’t discussed who would be on top or anything about actually making porn together, and he had no idea if he was about to cross a line with his lover. He didn’t have time to ask permission or see how Chester felt about things. If he was going to take control of the situation, it had to be now.

“Sir, you’re going to have to rethink this a little bit,” he said, pointing at the script. “I’ll be the one… on top.” He didn’t want to say “doing the fucking.” It seemed disrespectful of his boyfriend. 

Mark’s eyes widened as he stared at his newest employee. “I’m sorry, Mike, but I think you misunderstand how things work around here. I thought for sure Chester would have informed you that all scenes are dictated by _my_ vision.” He pressed his open palm to his chest. “Now, moving on, once we get the shots we need, we’ll need to -”

“I think you misunderstood _me_.” Mike pointed at his chest with one finger as he set the script down on the edge of the desk. “I’m going to be the one doing the fucking if I’m going to be doing this,” he said flatly, his annoyance rising a bit and causing his neck and cheeks to flush with suppressed anger. He didn’t look at Chester. He was afraid of his reaction to what he’d just said. 

Chester’s mouth had already dropped open. His heart had picked up a beat as he looked from Mike to Mark and back again. He’d never heard anyone talk to Mark like that, and instinctual fear coursed through him. “Mike,” he hissed, “don’t.” 

Jason had already uncrossed his ankles and arms and was sitting up, suddenly interested in the conversation that had turned confrontational in seconds. He watched the standoff between Mark and Mike, both of them glaring at each other, and poor Chester watching from Mike’s other side. He was genuinely curious to see if Mike could win this argument on his own. He’d never seen anyone try to take control of a shoot before. 

Mark’s hands were on the verge of shaking. His teeth grit as he stared Mike Shinoda down. “Look,” he said, trying to keep from yelling, “it’s not your choice. You work for me. If I want to put you on your knees and have you gang banged, I will.” 

Mike could feel his heart racing, a combination of anger and fear, and he forced himself not to stand up and walk out. He’d read that contract twice before he’d signed it, and he clearly and vividly knew that the exclusivity was written in, spelled out to the detail. He was going to call Mark’s bluff and hope his boss didn’t know a damn thing about his parents. “You won’t. I’ll have a lawyer getting me out of this contract so fast it will make your head spin. Unlike the rest of your employees, I have access if I need it. I’m here for Chester, and for no other reason. I don’t need this.” He stopped and looked at his boyfriend, whose eyes were wide as he watched. He kept eye contact with Chester as he finished, “so I’m going to say again, I’ll be the one on top. That’s how it’s going to be.”

Every curse word in the history of the world was armed and ready on Mark’s tongue as he went to stand up. He was ready to tear this snotty, know-it-all to pieces and he’d take Chester down too, just in case he got any bright ideas from his loud mouthed lover. He already had his finger pointed at Mike, just as Jason stood up from his chair. 

“Mark, wait,” Jason said, closing the distance between them in a few hurried steps. He would be lying if he said he wasn’t completely impressed with Mike’s ability to stand up for himself, but he knew Mark was about to lose it and ruin things with Chester in the process. Watching Mike throughout the conversation, he could tell that there was an underlying fear there that would not make for a good look on camera. He didn’t want to have to spend all day shooting to get something that should be simple. 

He ran his hand up Mark’s outstretched arm and squeezed his shoulder. “Hun, listen,” he started, the endearment feeling foreign on his tongue. “Does it matter? If that’s what they’re more comfortable with, then the scene will come off better. You know that.” He tried hard to put loving tones in his voice, to use his best convincing eyes. It had been a long time since he’d tried to woo Mark into anything, but he felt compelled to help Mike out. What he was feeling was little bit like admiration for what Mike was doing, giving up his life for this business to protect the man he loved. He wanted to be able to stand up to Mark for Ryan, but in the absence of that, maybe he could help Mike out. “We don’t have to re-write anything, just switch their roles. We’ve never done this with people in an actual relationship before. I think it will come off better if they have a little input. And besides, I’ve been watching them.” He looked meaningfully at Mark, who had just flicked angry eyes his way. “I think in terms of the camera, Mike will come off far better as the dominant partner. I mean, look at them.” 

Mark’s angered glare halted for a second as he flipped his attention back and forth between Mike and Chester. He knew that Chester could easily pull off the top position and do it looking damn good. But now, as he inspected Chester’s shocked and worried eyes, the way his hand was up covering almost half his face, his flame tattoos not showing the regular punch of authority and confidence they usually did, the idea of him being in control didn’t seem as appealing. Instead he looked small, dwarfed as he sat next to Mike, who was sitting straight up in his chair, his dark eyes zeroed in on his target. He practically stank of dominance, control, and possessiveness. 

But no one told Mark what to do. Not in his house and about his business, which was just what he was about to say as he refused to let his pride go, until he felt Jason squeeze his shoulder again. He turned his chin and looked up at his husband - at his pleading eyes and partial smile - and something softened inside of Mark. It had been a rough last few days between them, and Mark felt the need to try a little harder at listening to his partner’s advice. “You might be right about that,” he grumbled before he let out a long sigh and looked back at Mike and Chester. “Alright,” he said, “we’ll try it the way you suggest. But if it doesn’t come out looking right, if you can’t manage the top role the way it needs to be done,” he said, pointing a finger at Mike, “then we’ll have to switch it back. But for now,” he said, his tone coming down out of the rafters, “I’m going to trust Jason’s instincts on this.” 

Jason moved his hand up to Mark’s neck, forcing himself to run his thumb down the muscle there even though he just wanted to sit back down, didn’t want to force any degree of intimacy between them. He rubbed there for a moment, trying to release some of the tension, and he looked at Mike and Chester. Mike was still upset but keeping his emotions in check as he nodded curtly and simply said, “thank you, sir.” Chester, on the other hand, looked a hot mess. 

“Alright, well, time is money,” Mark insisted as he swatted a hand toward his employees. “Go get in costume, and go to the piano room for the first scene. The floors and light in there will be a good backdrop. Chester,” he said, catching him before he could fully get up from his chair, “I want you to make sure he’s got a handle on signals. And let’s keep the script as is for the first scene. Let’s start with you on your knees.” His eyes shot from Chester over to Mike, waiting to see if he’d get anymore kickback. 

Mike stood up and reached for Chester’s hand. “Let’s go,” he said, tugging his boyfriend’s arm. He saw Chester nod out of the corner of his eye, but he wasn’t sure it that was for his benefit or to answer Mark. He didn’t care. Now that the adrenaline of challenging Mark was wearing off, he was nervous to hear what Chester would have to say about the entire confrontation. 

They headed down the hallway toward the costume room. Chester’s hand was still in Mike’s as they went, but somehow that didn’t feel reassuring. “I can’t believe you did that,” Chester whispered after he’d already looked over his shoulder - Jason and Mark weren’t following them. Yet. “He’s so pissed,” he said, not being able to help the shake in his voice. “When Mark’s pissed, we all suffer for it. That’s why we all just do what he says.” He looked over at Mike before he dropped his eyes to the floor. It was going to be a long, hard day anyway, but now Chester feared it was going to be twice as bad if Mark stayed on the warpath all the way through the shoot. 

Mike stopped right where they were in the hallway, pulling Chester’s hand close and wrapping his other arm around his boyfriend’s waist. He dropped his face into Chester’s neck and whispered, “I know. I’m sorry. I was panicking about all of this and I shot my mouth off before I thought about it. And then I was committed, and I wasn’t going to back down. I think it will be better if, if I’m the one, if I have a little more control over the situation. I’m sorry. I should have asked you.” 

Chester returned the embrace, leaning his head close to Mike’s. “It’s not that. He’s mad. . .and bad things happen when he’s mad. If Jason wouldn’t have stepped in. . .” He stopped, not wanting to finish his thought out loud. Over the last three years he’d seen the outcome of Mark’s anger, of his need to make a point, and even though he’d agreed to let things go the way Mike wanted, Chester knew it wasn’t going to go smoothly. 

“I’m sorry,” Mike said again, leaving a small kiss next to Chester’s ear. “But nothing bad will happen to you, Ches. I’m here. And I’m not going to let it happen. I meant what I said, I don’t need this. I’m here for you. I’m not going to be ordered around and made to do things I don’t want to do. We should have a say in some of this. We aren’t like everyone else. We’re together, we love each other. That has to count for something.”

Chester nodded, even though he didn’t completely agree with what his boyfriend was saying. _I do need this. I can’t walk away. I’m stuck, even if he doesn’t want to admit it._ Chester let out a shiver before he pulled away. Standing here in the hallway wasn’t going to make the day go any faster. “Maybe it will be okay,” he offered, even though he knew he didn’t sound convincing. “Come on, let’s get in costume. That’s the easy part.” 

“Wait,” Mike said softly, pulling Chester’s hand back toward him again. “Are we okay? You’re upset, and I hate that. I can’t do this if you and I aren’t okay.”

Chester rubbed his forehead. This wasn’t the way he pictured this day going. “I’m not upset at you,” he said, squeezing Mike’s hand, “I’m just nervous. I wanted this to be easy for you this first time, and I don’t think it’s going to be. Mark can be a slave driver, especially if he’s holding something against you. All those times I had to stay an extra day, remember? Usually it was because we’d messed up somehow and made him mad. Or he was taking other shit out on us. I just didn’t want that for you.” 

Mike shook his head and ventured a smile in Chester’s direction. “It’s going to be fine. I’m not afraid of him. Maybe I should be,” he amended, “but I’m not going to let that dictate things. If I’m going to be here, I promise I’ll behave, as long as he’s not mistreating you. But I can’t promise I can control myself when it comes to you, if anything is wrong, if he’s an ass to you…” He let his voice drift off as he looked at Chester’s concerned expression. “I love you. It’s going to be fine. Let’s go change and get this over with.” 

****

Chester had taken his place on the piano room floor. He’d been instructed to put on a pair of skin tight red pants, with black boots, and so he did. His top remained shirtless as he kept his hands behind his back. He watched intently as Mike stood off camera, dressed in a white, v-neck shirt and jeans, only his were much looser. Neither of them had on underwear. 

Chester looked away from his boyfriend to see Jason standing close by with a camera as he checked lighting and angles. “Hey,” Chester said softly, his eyes darting over to see Mark standing with Mike in the wings, “thanks for what you did before. Saying something to Mark for us. I, I had no idea Mike was going to do that.” 

Jason glanced over at his husband before he answered, keeping his voice low as well. “I just thought I could help make it a little less awkward. Mike’s already struggling, I can tell.”

Chester nodded. “Doesn’t everyone struggle on their first day?” He flashed Jason a quick smile. “God, remember my first full shoot? It was awful,” he remember with a shiver. “I screwed up every single line I had and kept looking right at the camera,” he laughed. 

“Be ready to have to do things more than once today,” Jason said as he nodded, thinking about how everyone’s first shoot typically went. Lots of do-overs. “I know you and Ry had things down pretty well, but this will be different.” His eyes flashed back to Mark quickly, hoping he hadn’t heard him say ‘Ry’. It was a little too familiar for a boss employee relationship.

“I know,” Chester agreed as thoughts of his friend and ex-shooting partner crossed his mind. He and Ryan did have everything down pat. They could breeze through a scene in a matter of hours. Most of the time they didn’t even need to use verbal cues with each other anymore, they could tell by other means when it was time to stop, to move, to switch things up. _It won’t be like that with Mike. Not for awhile, and definitely not like at home._ The thought caused Chester’s head to drop. The last thing he wanted was for any of this to taint what they’d created together as lovers in their lives away from YRS. 

“You ready?” Jason asked, wary of the change in Chester’s body language as he’d finished getting his equipment set. He felt a wave of compassion for Chester, having a fairly good idea what he was thinking about at the moment. Porn and the person you love shouldn’t have to mix, he’d learned that while filming Ryan. “Hey, it’s going to be okay,” he said, trying to catch Chester’s eyes.

Chester brought his hand out from behind his back to wipe across his eyes and then over his red-tipped mohawk before he looked back over at his boss. “I know,” he agreed softly before his attention went across the room. “I hope Mark won’t be too hard on him. Mike can be stubborn, well, you saw,” he said without looking back at Jason. 

Jason just nodded before he called out, “I’m ready. Let’s get this going.” He looked at Mark and Mike. “I need you in the scene, Mike. I’ll be filming you coming in, though, so don’t look at the camera.”

Mike felt like his legs were made out of lead as he nodded, thinking about what he needed to do. He needed to cross the space, get right in front of Chester, and boss him around a bit. There wasn’t one thing sexy about the thought of commanding his lover around at the moment, not like it was at home. Right now all he felt was anxiety, and fear that no matter what Chester did, his own self-consciousness would get in the way of him even being able to get hard. He couldn’t help that his brain was screaming at him about how wrong all of this was, and he was frozen to the spot, looking at Chester already on his knees across the room.

Before he could convince his legs to work, he felt Mark’s hand on his back, roughly pushing him a step forward. “I’m going,” Mike snapped, jerking away from Mark’s touch.

He tried to look anything but terrified as he crossed the room, ignored the camera like he’d been instructed, and stopped in front of Chester. He wasn’t thinking as he raised his hand to Chester’s head, cupping the side of his face, and fumbling with the words, “suck me off.” They came out softly instead of aggressively the way they were intended, and Mike could see the concern in Chester’s eyes as he looked up at him. He’d already screwed up. 

“Cut!” Mark yelled as he stomped across the room. “Mike, you’ve got to say it louder and sound like you mean it,” he instructed. “Don’t touch his face,” he ordered, pointing down at Chester. “If you want to touch him, grab his hair.” He spun around, made a rolling motion with his hand toward Jason, and then headed off camera. “Let’s go again. Mike, take a few steps back and then walk up to Chester again and start over with your line.” 

Mike looked down at Chester, immediately fearful of how they were going to keep this all separate from their personal life. He didn’t want to manhandle him, to make it look like he was forcing him into anything, but there was no room in this for tenderness. It wasn’t going to work like that. A smaller, quieter part of him was scared that once he turned this aggressive persona on, he wouldn’t be able to come back from it. He liked the way it felt to be in control too much. He needed to figure out how to define the line between personal and porn - quickly. 

“Mike,” Chester whispered, catching his lover’s eyes, “just do it. It’s just work, remember? It doesn’t mean anything. I can take it,” he stated with a smile, his piercing pressing against his bottom lip. “It’s like at home with the collar. Let me have it.” 

Jason’s mouth dropped open as he overheard the last bit of Chester’s encouragement. _Collar? Fuck. I was right. Mike is definitely the dominant one. I hope Mark didn’t hear that, we’ll be changing costumes before I can blink._

With a nod, Mike turned away and drew in a deep breath, crossing back over to his starting place. _I can do this. I can walk over there and grab him and sound in control. I can do this. It’s not home. It’s work. It’s a role, it’s pretend. It’s role-play. That’s what it is, it’s like acting out a fantasy._ He looked at Jason, who gave him a single nod, and then crossed the room again, this time with more purpose in his step.

When he got in front of Chester, he lowered his hand to the spiky mohawk and grabbed at it, making sure not to pull too roughly. “Suck me off,” he commanded, his voice rougher this time. 

Chester’s eyes were up, looking right into Mike’s face. He licked his tongue over his lip ring as he let out a dramatic moan. Without saying anything he pressed his hands to Mike’s hips, rubbing them for a moment, spreading his fingers over the empty belt loops and then over to his crotch. He let one hand go around to Mike’s ass, and he squeezed it. “Are you sure?” he asked, looking back up as he waited for Mike’s next line. 

“Do it,” Mike said, tugging on Chester’s hair and leaning his head back with his eyes closed. “I want it.” In his head, he was the opposite of wanting Chester’s mouth around him, but that wasn’t the script. He’d have to forget his misgivings about the whole thing, because he was about to be exposed in front of the camera, and if he thought about it too much, they’d never get this scene finished. 

“Make sure he’s at least half hard before you pull those jeans down, Chester!” Mark shouted from the sidelines. 

_I know how to do my fucking job,_ Chester thought, saving the eye roll from the camera as he kept quiet. He kept one hand on Mike’s ass, his other running up and down between Mike’s thighs. He pressed on each leg, and then he cupped his hand up under his boyfriend’s crotch, being careful not to grab too hard, but enough so Mike could feel it. He stroked him a few times as best as he could before he leaned forward, pressing open mouth kisses to the front of the jeans, blowing out hot air to create a _warm blow_ to try and get his lover hard enough for them to move on. 

Mike kept his hand in Chester’s hair and tried to shut off his thoughts about what was coming next. He’d heard Mark’s harsh yell, which didn’t help anything Chester was trying to get going. After a few caresses, he dropped his head and let his eyes fall on his boyfriend, letting the focus of his world narrow to just Chester, Chester between his legs, Chester on his knees, touching and kissing him. It was a sight he loved, and even though there was a part of his anxious brain that still registered he was being watched, he felt his body responding to what was happening. Despite the circumstances, he felt his cock wake up and decide to play the game. 

Chester’s working hand felt the change as Mike’s cock started to stiffen, and relief swept over him. Getting hard and staying hard through all the scene changes, camera angles, ordered instructions, and the general stress of being filmed, was the most challenging part of porn. But Mike had made it, at least for now. 

With a smile on his face, Chester looked up, his fingers already undoing the button fly on Mike’s jeans as he said, “Mmmmm, Sexy Boy, you-” He stopped suddenly, his face paling as he let go of his lover and dropped his eyes for a second before looking over at Jason. “I’m sorry,” he apologized. “I didn’t mean that.” 

“No, no!” Mark called as he rushed across the room, getting right up on Mike and Chester. “I like, keep that in. Do it again,” he ordered before he turned and went back off camera. 

“No,” Mike said instantly. “We agreed on names. That’s not going in there.” _Damn it. I was just getting into a good mental space to make this happen. And there’s no way anything from our private life is going into this. Fuck._

Mark was already huffing across the room, ready to put Mike in his place. He was really getting tired of all this back talk, especially from a new guy who hadn’t worked a day in the business. 

“No, Mark,” Chester said, looking around Mike’s legs to see his boss. “That was my fuck up. It sounds stupid. Let me do it again. I’ll make it hella better, you’ll see.” He held his breath, hoping to save another argument from happening and he was relieved when he saw Mark roll his hand. 

“Alright, but do it right this time,” he grumbled before letting it go and ordering Jason to roll camera. 

Chester felt himself shake as he looked back up at Mike. “I’m sorry,” he whispered. He wanted to say more, to apologize properly, but he knew this wasn’t the time or the place for that. They had work to do, and he’d screwed up. He shut his eyes and started counting. _Ten, nine, eight, seven, six, five, four. . ._ He let one more breath out before he put his hands back on Mike’s jeans, and looked up. “Mmmmm, Kenji, I know you’re going to taste fucking good.” He stuck his tongue out, like he was panting as he went back to undoing Mike’s jeans. 

Jason kept the camera trained on what Chester was doing, but his mind was racing. There had been a lot of conflict already today, and now Chester was screwing up lines. He didn’t know if this was all going to work out after all. It was early, and they were in their first scene, but Mark was having far less patience with Mike than he usually did with new boys. It was making him feel anxious, and he’d gotten over that a long time ago.

Mike kept his eyes on Chester, his ears barely registering the porn name they’d come up with. In his mind he was still hearing ‘Sexy Boy’ and even if it wasn’t what he should have been thinking, it was helping. It was making it possible for him to look forward to Chester getting those jeans down and wrapping those gorgeous lips around his cock. In the back of his mind he knew they needed to get through this before Mark blew a fuse.

Chester undid the button on Mike’s jeans, and with one last look up to meet his boyfriend’s dark eyes, he yanked the jeans down, one inch at a time so the camera could capture it. He moved one hand over, crossing the crotch, and he felt that Mike was still hard enough for this to work. His fingers feathered back up, and pulled them the rest of the way down, Mike’s cock popping out into the open air. 

It took everything in Mike’s willpower not to shield his body from the camera that he could suddenly feel on him. He was not going to force this scene into another take, no matter how awful it felt to be exposed the way he was. He kept thinking about Chester, how good he was at going down on him, how much he loved the feel of the lip ring against him, trying to focus on what was coming instead of how uncomfortable he was. _Block it out. It’s just Chester. Just you and Ches, that’s all. Let it happen._

Chester’s eyes hadn’t left Mike’s cock. It was slowly falling and then raising, like it was pulsing, and Chester was ready to take it in his mouth. He licked his lips, and started to gather spit before he leaned in close, turning his head and blocking the camera’s view for a second, which he knew was a no-no. “Mike,” he whispered, “if you need me to stop for any reason, tug on my ear, okay? If you get too close or something goes wrong.” He didn’t wait for an answer or any sort of acknowledgement before he pulled back, licked his lips dramatically and then he was going for it. He took Mike’s head into his mouth, sucking and licking at his lover’s slit. He wrapped one hand around Mike’s shaft, and in one fluid motion, he started to slide it farther and farther into his mouth. 

From behind the camera, Jason took in a deep breath. This was nothing like watching Chester and Ryan. He could clearly see the difference in Mike’s face alone. There was a different look about them both as Chester did his work, and Jason felt guilty for watching. Even if they were trying to be in their roles, what was happening was a glimpse into the intimacy of their bedroom, something he’d never seen before when shooting scenes. For everyone else, there were no emotions involved in the actions, but for Mike and Chester, it was clear there was something else there.

He glanced at Mark, who was watching intently. Jason could practically see the dollar signs in his eyes as he watched Mike react to Chester’s mouth, the genuine moans of pleasure that were coming from his newest employee. If they could get Mike more comfortable in front of the camera, this partnership was going to work out just fine.

Mike couldn’t help but lose himself in the moment, and he heard himself moan as Chester took him in as far as he could, the warm, wet cavern of his mouth all around his cock. He wasn’t thinking about anything other than Chester, and they might as well have been at home alone for all his brain was helping. He rocked his hips forward just a little as he relaxed his hold on Chester’s hair, his hand slipping down his lover’s face. 

Mark took a step forward, his arm raised, his mouth opening just before Jason turned and shook his head at him and mouthed the words, “It’s good! Let them!”

Mark clamped his mouth shut and moved a little closer. This wasn’t supposed to be a romantic scene, and face touching was tender. It was familiar, and not meant for what they were going for. He found himself next to Jason, watching as his husband filmed. He watched as Mike’s fingers feathered around Chester’s face, and back up to his hair, only this time they petted over the mohawk, instead of grabbing it aggressively.

Mark waited, letting it happen for a few minutes before he shouted, “Tongue his balls, Chester, now!” 

With a shock, Mike jolted back into reality. He’d let himself get carried away, and there was no telling what his face had looked like. He colored with embarrassment as he looked down at Chester.

Without too much thought, Chester did as he was told. He pulled back, letting Mike’s cock go free from his mouth. He took a moment to lick his lips and take a few good breaths before he grabbed it again, lifting it up and exposing Mike’s scrotum. He leaned in and let his tongue do its work. He sucked in Mike’s natural scent, and he relished the fact that he was getting to do this with his lover instead of someone else. He ignored the pain going on in his knees as he slid his tongue around each hidden sphere, as he ran his other hand up Mike’s bare thigh. 

Mike let all the sensations take over and quickly the embarrassment faded again in favor of the pleasure. He was having a hard time keeping his thoughts straight with Chester’s tongue making his knees weak. It was all he could do to stay upright, and his hand landed on the top of Chester’s head for support.

Chester was measuring Mike’s moans and movements as he went, and without being told to, he knew it was time to go back to the star of the show - Mike’s cock. He gave one last teasing lick to Mike’s balls before he gave him a few good pumps and slid his mouth back over his boyfriend’s head and shaft. He pulled back, leaving his mouth hanging open, and all the spit that went with it, before taking it again. He made all the right noises, and made sure to pace out how many times he pulled completely off of Mike and how many times he just slid back to the head, teasing it with his tongue. 

“That’s good,” Mark mumbled before he shouted, “Touch yourself now, Chester!” 

Chester’s free hand left Mike’s leg as he fumbled over the front of the red pants he still had on. He knew what Mark wanted and he tried hard to keep his sucking and licking on par as he undid his pants with one hand. He got the button undone and the zipper halfway down before he shoved his hand in and grabbed himself. 

“The camera wants to see it!” Mark bellowed, and Chester followed orders, pulling his dick free, even as the zipper dragged on his tender skin and he winced. 

It was another harsh jolt of reality for Mike, hearing Mark yelling at his boyfriend even while he was still expertly blowing him. He felt a bubble of anger in his chest at the way Mark was ordering Chester around, but pushed it away quickly, knowing if he focused on that he’d lose his hard on despite Chester’s best efforts. It was confusing to be both turned on and annoyed. He had to stay focused on what was happening, he’d have to deal with the emotions later. 

Having already learned a little bit about Mike from the work they’d done so far, Jason knew better than to have the camera on Mike’s face while Mark barked orders from the sideline. He’d seen each flash of annoyance as irritation crossed Mike’s mind, and he didn’t want to have to reshoot a bunch of stuff later. Thankfully, Chester was a pro in front of the camera, taking instructions without flinching. The only thing Jason had caught by accident was the little wince when Chester had unzipped his pants too hastily.

Mark leaned close to Jason’s ear. “This is excellent. Let’s cut here. I think we’ll skip the second blow job. Let’s get Chester out of those pants and over on the couch. Mike can fondle him there.” 

Jason listened as Mark stopped the scene, watched Mike’s face drop into embarrassment again as he stood listening to instructions, his lower half exposed and his boyfriend in a compromising position at his feet. He turned away as they reorganized, for the first time in his career shooting porn, feeling sorry for the boys he was filming. 

****

“Cut!” had been yelled minutes ago, but Chester still hadn’t moved. His body was spent, and everything felt numb as he laid naked on his stomach. He was breathing hard, his eyes shut. He was pretty sure he was stuck to the designer, gold leaf sheets by a layer of sweat and the offering of cum he’d released as Mike had pounded into him for the camera. His mind was far off in the blank feeling of having been good and fucked, and moving was the furthest thing from his want-list. But he also knew this was work. He wasn’t at home where he could take his time recovering. Time was money, and he knew that any minute he’d be ordered to get up and move off set. 

Mike was breathing hard, and he could feel the sweat in his hair and the clamminess on his back. He felt sick. Taking orders while trying simultaneously not to hurt his boyfriend and keep things going was overwhelming. He didn’t feel the same post-sex euphoria he usually felt. Instead he was upset and concerned, and trying not to show it. He knew he wasn’t doing a very good job at the moment. All he wanted to do was pull Chester close and find comfort in his kisses, but there was no way he was going to do that in front of Mark and Jason. They’d already seen enough.

Mark patted Jason on the shoulder before he headed over to the bed. “Boys, that was fantastic,” he said, his grin wide as he soaked up the sight of their naked, used bodies. “We still have to go over the takes, make sure we got everything. If we need to reshoot anything, we’ll do it later.” He paused for a moment, his concentration falling over Chester’s naked shoulders, and the curve of his lower back that led to his ass. “Get some food, rest up,” he ordered, though his voice had dropped to something softer. 

Chester’s mind was off. He knew all this. It was the same speech after every shoot: Rest. Eat. Get something to drink. There’s alcohol if you want it. It was all part of how things went. The rest of the day would be free, until Mark would inevitably call them back to redo something. There was _always_ something that didn’t live up to his standards the first time around.

“I think Brad is barbequing out by the pool,” Mark said as he moved closer to the bed. “You boys deserve a good meal after that performance.” He reached down, his eyes greedily eating up every inch of Chester’s skin as he touched him on the shoulder - the sweaty warmth sending an extra dose of pleasure through Mark’s system. “And, Chaz,” he said, his voice dropping to a more intimate undertone, “you can take a dip after you eat, or soak in the hot tub, of course.” His hand slid from Chester’s shoulder, down onto his back. 

Chester’s eyes opened, the touch jerking him from his numb state. He sucked in his breath as he felt Mark’s hand headed right for his ass. 

“Don’t touch him!” Mike said immediately, sitting up with a scowl. He went to reach across Chester’s body to push Mark away, but his nudity caused him to pause, feeling vulnerable. “Chester, move,” he ordered instead, not looking at his boyfriend, but at Mark. He hated Mark and he hated anytime anyone called _his_ Chester _Chaz_.

Chester was frozen, Mark’s hand still on him. He turned his head to look at Mike, and the moment their eyes met, a small amount of courage soaked into Chester’s heart. He rolled away from his boss’ touch and sat up, peeling himself from the sheets. His head felt dizzy for a second as he fully regained his senses. 

Mike reached for Chester and pulled him over close, and he could feel the tremors coming off his body. He was fired up; Chester was upset, and Mike had promised he would keep Mark away from him. “Exclusivity extends to you, too,” Mike said boldly, tucking Chester a little behind him. “Don’t touch him again.” 

Mark was still partly bent over the bed, his hand still outstretched. As he locked eyes with Mike in a stand off, his fist clenched. He knew what he had agreed to, but he hadn’t counted on Mike being Chester’s little watchdog, either. “You’ve got a big mouth,” he said as he slowly stood himself up straight. “And you overreact. You’re going to have to chill out if you’re going to make it here. . .if Chester’s going to make it here.” 

Mike knew that Chester needed to get along at YRS. He’d been told so many times he could recite exactly how his boyfriend would sound as he listed off the reasons he couldn’t leave. It was important for Chester to keep his paycheck, but he wasn’t going to let it be at the expense of his safety. “My actions shouldn’t affect Chester or his work here. The only thing I’m doing is making sure you uphold your part of the contract. Our contracts.” He could hear his heartbeat pounding in his ears as he kept his eyes trained on Mark.

The air in the bedroom was thick with tension as Mark shoved a hand through his dark hair. “Get off set,” he ordered both of them before he spun around and headed for Jason. “Go get cleaned up and out of my sight!” he yelled over his shoulder as he went. Everything inside of him was storming. He’d gone from being rather turned on, to being pissed all in the matter of ninety seconds, and his mind and dick were now fighting. He was ready to grab someone and release it all on them. His eyes were set on his husband, who was surrounded by camera equipment at the moment. He’d take Jason down the hall to their bedroom, and he’d get it all out of his system. 

“It’s fucking hot in here,” Mark growled as he stopped to open the bedroom door, feeling like he was about to suffocate. His lungs felt tight and he was already unbuttoning his shirt as he stepped out into the hallway for much needed sweat-free air. He only made it through two large gasps before he spotted Ryan just coming up the stairs. 

Mark’s gray eyes popped with interest at Ryan’s tight, form fitting blue jeans and the black t-shirt that was short enough to show off a glimpse of his midriff. The sparkling, silver belt he had on just added an extra umph to what was growing in Mark’s pants. “Ryan!” he called, waving his arm, and catching his employee’s attention. 

His yell caught Jason’s attention too, and he stepped from the bedroom quickly, catching sight of his lover. He was right on time, and he looked amazing. If the shoot with Mike and Chester had gone smoother, Jason would have been able to meet him downstairs, and he would have never been on Mark’s radar. But he knew, as soon as Mark had called his name, what was coming. There was nothing he could do to stop it without giving Mark a clue to what was going on between him and Ryan.

Ryan had seen Mark in the hallway, but he had turned to go the opposite way. He didn’t want to see or talk to Mark. He wanted to find Jason. They’d been texting almost non-stop over the last day or so since their romantic night together, and he was dying to whisk him away into one of the bedrooms for the small amount of privacy he was hoping they could scavenge around Mark’s prying eyes. But his boss was calling for him, so he turned around and pushed a smile as he headed toward Mark’s beckoning arm.

Before Ryan could say anything, Mark had his arm around his shoulders, pulling him down the hallway, away from the set and away from Jason, who was standing in the doorway, watching. “Let’s go to my room,” Mark said, “it’s been awhile since we’ve really talked.” 

Jason could do nothing but watch as his husband pulled his lover into his bedroom and closed the door. He heard the lock engage and his heart sank as the bile rose in his throat. He thought he might be sick right there in the hallway outside the set bedroom, with Chester clinging to Mike behind him. Ryan had been in the wrong place at the wrong time, and it was his fault. No, it was Mike’s fault. Mike had caused this.

He turned toward the bedroom, ready to unleash his anger on Mike, but the sight of the couple on the bed hit him in the gut. Chester’s eyes were huge, and Mike’s assertiveness had dissolved into something that looked like fear. They were afraid of Mark, just like he was. They were all in this together. Mike was only trying to do for Chester what Jason wished he could do for Ryan. He couldn’t blame him for doing what he thought would keep Mark away. 

Without thinking it through, he sat down on the edge of the bed that Chester and Mike were still in the middle of, dropping his head into his hands. “Fuck,” he whispered, his profanity strangled with emotion. “Chaz, he’s got Ryan. Fuck.” 

Chester nodded. “I heard. I heard,” he whispered, his arm linked to Mike’s. “I’m sorry. Jay, I’m. . .maybe it won’t be so bad.” He took a hard swallow as he dropped his head. He knew that was a lie. It would be bad. Bad for Ryan. 

Mike was quiet for a moment as the reality of the situation sank in. Mark wasn’t just any boss. Mark was in complete control of everyone and everything at YRS. Even his own husband was afraid of him. Everything Jason had said to get Mike to come on board felt a thousand times worse as he watched things unfold the past few hours. This wasn’t going to be easy. Defending Chester wasn’t going to be easy, especially when it ended with someone else getting Mark’s wrath. “Jason, I’m sorry,” he said quietly, rubbing his hand over Chester’s side. “I didn’t know.” 

Jason didn’t lift his head, swiping his hand across his eyes. He couldn’t sit there and cry. He had to pull himself together. Wrap things up with the cameras and get away. His legs felt shaky as he stood up, checking things over with the equipment and saying, “you two need to get out of here. Go get clean and get out to the pool. You don’t want to be up here.” He turned and met Chester’s eyes.

There was no question what Jason meant as Chester nodded. He rubbed a hand over his sweaty hair and down his face. “Fuck,” he hissed before dropping his head and shaking it for a moment. “Come on,” he mumbled as he let go of Mike’s arm and scooted toward the edge of the bed. He glanced around for the red pants he’d had on originally, but they weren’t here. They hadn’t made it upstairs from the couch scene. He stood up, hating the sticky feeling that was all over him. Thankfully his bedroom was only a few doors away. 

Mike didn’t think twice as he followed his boyfriend, ready to disappear from everyone. “I’m right behind you, Ches,” he mumbled, not looking Jason’s direction as they left the room. He walked behind Chester in silence, his face burning with the shame of walking through the open space naked. Now that the scene was over, the reality of it all had sunk in, and he wanted nothing more than to be in one of his flannel shirts, concealed from the world. 

Chester kept quiet as he opened the bedroom door and headed right for his closet. The sad planet of regret sitting on his chest was heavy as he thought about Ryan and what was probably happening right now. He thought about Jason, and how much he knew the other man was hurting. He stared blankly at the row of hangers and shirts, and for the first time in a long while, he wasn’t sure what he wanted to wear. 

“Ches?” Mike asked quietly, watching his lover’s slumped shoulders as he stood still in front of the closet. “Are you okay, babe?”

Chester shook his head. He wasn’t sure how much he should say. He knew Mike wouldn’t understand. He hadn’t been around YRS long enough yet, and more than that, he’d never been under Mark’s greedy hands, and he never would be. “I told you bad things happen when he’s mad,” Chester said, holding back the raw emotion that wanted to pour from his eyes. “It’s not Ryan’s fault, but he’s going to get it.” 

Mike felt his blood boil again at Chester’s words. It had been a tiring day, cycling through the anger, the shame, the frustration, and the fear. “How many times have you been on the receiving end of Mark’s anger? Has he ever hit you, Chester? I won’t stand for that. It’s bad enough that he thinks he just has free access to everyone, but I can’t stand the thought of him hitting anyone. Is he violent?” Mike had stepped toward Chester and reached for him, unsettled when his boyfriend flinched slightly under his hands. 

“We’ve all been there,” Chester answered. He didn’t want to look at Mike right now, and he really didn’t want to talk about it. Not now. “I need a shower,” he said as he reached in the closet and grabbed the first thing he saw - a dark gray shirt and a pair of blue jeans. He spun away from the closet and scooted around Mike to get to the dresser. He quickly pulled out a pair of black underwear and white socks, not even noticing that nothing was matching. “I’ll be back,” he said before he headed out the door, his clothes over his arm. Walking down the hallways of YRS naked was nothing new to him. 

With a sigh, Mike sat down on the edge of the bed. Their bed. _He just walked away from me. I don’t think he’s ever done that. One day here, and look at where we are. I hate Mark. I hate this place! I hate everything that happens here and I hate knowing I can’t just take Chester and leave. He’s mad at me. I made things worse. I’ve screwed up._ He sat for a few more minutes before he got up and located some clothes to take to the bathroom. _I’m not going to let him walk away from me. That’s not how this is going to work. We’re not going to have space between us._

Mike held his clothes in front of him as he stalked back down the hallway. Even if Chester didn’t want him around, he wasn’t going to leave him alone in this house. He stopped outside the door of the bathroom, considering whether he should wait for Chester to be finished. With a sideways look down the hallway, he opened the door and stepped inside. 

It was already steamy from Chester’s shower, and the mirror was fogged. Mike set his clothes on the counter and called, “Ches? I’m in here, just waiting on you. I didn’t want to leave you alone, but I understand if you want some space. I’m just gonna sit out here while you shower.” 

Inside the shower stall, Chester was pretty sure he heard Mike’s voice. He looked, but the frosted glass of the shower wall only allowed him to see a blob of color on the other side. He turned the tap, shutting off the shower before he slid the door open and looked out. He still had shampoo in his hair, and water dripping down his face as he spotted Mike over by the door. “What did you say?” he asked, wiping a hand down his face and squinting his eyes.

A smile crossed Mike’s lips as he looked at Chester with his wet, bubbly hair. “You look adorable,” he couldn’t stop himself from saying. “I was just telling you that I was here. But I know you want some space. I’ll just sit here while you shower.” 

Chester let out a sigh. “It’s not that I want space, Mike, it’s just that. . .things are complicated here and I feel like shit for what happened.” He dropped his gaze to the expensive porcelain tiles on the floor before looking back up at his boyfriend. “I’d offer for you to join me,” he said, letting his lips press to a smile, “but we need to save that for home. It’s kinda cramped in here.” 

Mike felt the relief all the way down to his toes as Chester smiled at him. “I’m good here, babe. Maybe you’ll stand guard for me while I shower?” 

Chester twisted his fingers into his soapy mohawk. “Well, I do have to do my hair afterward, so as long as you can meet that timeframe,” he said, tossing Mike a boyish grin, before he leaned back and closed the shower door. “I love you!” he shouted before he turned on the water. 

Even though he knew Chester couldn’t hear him, he shouted back, “I love you, too!” Maybe the rest of the day wouldn’t be a complete loss. He settled back against the cabinets and closed his eyes to wait, just as his stomach rumbled. He hoped Chester would hurry, it was time for dinner. 

****

The afternoon sun was giving off just the right amount of heat and light to send shimmering sparkles through the tall pitcher of fresh lemonade Brad had mixed together for his gang of hungry troops. He sighed lovingly at it, before he turned away and back toward his open grill. He leaned forward a little, taking in the wafting smell of rich barbeque sauce soaked ribs, and chicken legs. “My darlings,” he said, eyeing the meat, “you’re about to feed a lot of hungry souls.” 

He shut the lid on the grill, and turned around, scanning the patio area. Most of the chairs were empty, but he knew it wouldn’t be long and the boys would be out here rummaging for food. He did a mental count. _I know Mike and Chester are here. Ryan should be here today, and Toby and Amir._ He let his eyes drift over to Jason, who was slumped onto the furthest deck chair. His dark hair was in his face as he sat looking like a crushed doll. _And Jason makes six. Mark won’t eat out here. He doesn’t like barbeque anyway. That must be what’s wrong with him._ He cracked a short smile before he said, “Jason? You are going to eat, aren’t you?” 

There was a long pause before Jason mustered enough strength to answer, “sure. I guess. I’m not really hungry.” His chest was tight with tears he couldn’t shed at the moment. He felt like a traitor, sitting outside where he could hear nothing, pretend everything was fine, while Ryan was upstairs. He closed his eyes and breathed in through his nose. _Mark won’t really hurt him. He’s got a shoot tomorrow. It’s just gonna be sex. Sex that Ryan doesn’t want, but that’s nothing new. I can’t wait to get out of here._

Brad snapped his fingers before he pointed at Jason. “You know, you look dehydrated. You need something to drink,” he decided as he stepped over to his gleaming pitcher of lemonade. He took a glass, and filled it to the brim before he walked over to Jason. He fussed with his white apron as he sat down on the edge of the deck chair next to his cousin in law. “Here, this will help you feel better.” He reached to hand the drink off, his other hand going to Jason’s shoulder, but just as the two made contact, a wave swept over Brad and he froze. His fingers dug into Jason’s shoulder for a few seconds before he let go. 

“Wow,” the cook said, his brown eyes twice their normal size as he breathed through his mouth and held his stomach. “I just had a vision. Oh, oh, Jason,” he half gasped as he looked up to meet the other man’s surprised face. “You, you’re in love. You’re in love but not here. I could see you, you were at a loft apartment, and there was an ocean view. . .but you weren’t with Mark.”

Jason struggled for air as he tightened his grip on the glass and took it from Brad’s hand. “You and your visions,” he scoffed. “Thanks for the drink.” He looked away and took a sip, trying to dismiss Brad without giving anything away. He couldn’t imagine how Brad would be able to know anything about his time at Chester’s, but then the thought occurred to him - Brad had heard his argument with Mark. He knew he was going to Chester’s, and he knew about the loft. His mind was just looping it all together for his bogus vision. 

Brad reached over, taking hold of Jason’s arm lightly. “You were at peace,” he said, quietly. “Not like you are now.” He stopped for a moment, glancing over his shoulder toward the door, but they were still alone. “There was another man there. A dark haired man with beautiful eyes.” 

“What?” Jason gasped as a vision of Ryan passed through his mind. “Brad, you’re crazy.” He shook his head as he stumbled over his words. “I don’t, Mark, he, you know, he doesn’t have beautiful eyes. You don’t know what you’re talking about.” He could feel a bit of panic rising to take the place of the heartbreak he’d been feeling seconds earlier. 

“I just tell it like I see it,” Brad said as he patted Jason’s leg and stood up. He fussed with his curly hair for a moment before he stopped and spun around. “My ribs are done!” he announced as he headed for the grill. 

About that time was when Amir made his appearance, coming out the back door and heading straight for the grill. “Did I get here in time to hear you say the food is ready?” He inhaled the smoky scent of the barbeque sauce and glanced around the pool. “We eating out here?” He looked up to see Mike and Chester had followed him outside. 

“Brad, you’ve outdone yourself and I haven’t even eaten anything!” Chester cheered as he joined the gang at the grill, slobber practically dripping down his chin. “I want to eat it all.” 

“You’re going to have to wait,” Brad instructed as he grabbed a pair of tongs and started to pull the ribs off the heat and onto a plate. “The chicken still has a few minutes. Why don’t you two make yourselves useful and pour everyone some lemonade.” He twisted around to point at the drink cart with his tongs.

Chester glanced at Amir, and between a few shrugs, they decided to do as they were told. They reluctantly left the grill to start pouring glasses of lemonade for everyone. Chester lined up the full glasses on the cart before he looked behind him to see Mike still standing close to the door. “Sexy Boy,” he called, “you want lemonade?” 

The endearment caught Jason’s ear, and he looked over at Mike and Chester. They looked better now, more relaxed, but he was still upset. He wouldn’t feel right until Ryan was back downstairs.

“Lemonade is good, Ches,” Mike called as he stepped across the patio and next to him, taking a glass. “Thanks, babe.” A shower had done them both well, and his spirits were lifted from earlier. Now it was just relaxation for the rest of the night, until they could collapse in bed together. It was going to be okay. 

Chester leaned over, giving Mike a kiss, a small smooch that slowly turned to more, as his lips parted, and his hand went to Mike’s side. His eyes fell shut, his mind blocking out what was around them. Despite everything they’d been through together so far that day, they hadn’t really gotten to kiss each other, and that hunger was rising in Chester’s stomach. 

There was a silence all around the couple for moment as Amir, Brad, and Jason watched their kiss go deep. It wasn’t something they saw outside of shooting scenes, and even then, it was nothing like that. Those kisses didn’t hold the same passion, the same familiarity, as the one they were witnessing. “Well, shit, Chaz, you guys didn’t get enough of each other on the set today?” 

Chester’s ears perked up at the sound of his name, and he pulled out of the kiss to see Amir looking at him with a smirk on his face. “Jealous much?” he asked, a sheepish grin on his face as he swatted a hand toward his co-worker. “And no, guess we didn’t.” He looked back at Mike, his eyes shining. “I never get enough.” 

Mike smiled back, then leaned in for another kiss, a quicker one. “It’s better now that we’re not being shouted at,” he said, reaching a fingertip up to flip Chester’s lip ring. “It’s better when it’s just us.” 

Amir rolled his eyes at the sappy love talk. It was going to take some getting used to, hearing that around YRS. Most of the chatter around the pool was drunken bravado, not declarations of feelings. It was weird, but Chester was right. He was a little bit jealous.

Brad was plating ribs as he asked everyone which they wanted, ribs now or chicken in a few minutes, as the door opened and Ryan stepped out. Everyone turned to look, and Chester was the first one to break away from the pack. He stepped up close to his friend, his hand going to his shoulder. “Hey,” he said, quietly just between them, “you okay?” 

Ryan nodded. He offered Chester a soft smile before he took a long swallow. “Yeah, I’m okay, Chaz. Sore,” he added with a short wince, “but okay.” 

The two nodded in understanding. There was nothing else to say. Chester stepped back, allowing Ryan to move across the patio. He carefully took a seat on the deck chair next to Jason, the same one Brad had been sitting on. He kept his legs on the opposite side, so as not to be sitting too close. He hated that he couldn’t say anything to Jason other than, “Hey,” which felt weak and so far from all the things he wanted to say to him. 

Jason stopped himself from reaching a hand toward his lover. “Ry,” he started, his voice barely above a whisper. “I’ve been sick sitting here.” He looked up and caught Ryan’s beautiful blue eyes full of sorrow. “I hate him,” he choked out.

Ryan felt his bottom lip tremble. “I know,” he whispered back. “We all do.” He dropped his head, resisting the urge to say more, to swing around and pull Jason into his arms. 

“You can’t stay over here, you need to go back with the others,” Jason mumbled, his heart aching. “We’ll have to try later to get away. I don’t want him to come out here and see you with me. Let’s not make it any worse.” He scanned his eyes over the pool, making sure Mark hadn’t made it outside to find him yet. He knew it was coming, especially after their argument the other night. Mark would come and pull him away and try to be contrite, and he’d have to swallow his disgust and look the other way, just to get Mark to leave him alone. 

The others weren’t looking their direction. _The boys all know. They all know about me and Ryan, and now Brad’s having visions. We’ve got to be more careful, or Mark will find out._ “Baby, go get something to eat. I’ll be over in a few minutes. Let me go get the shit with Mark over with.” He stood up and looked down at Ryan. 

There was no arguing with what had to be done. That was how life worked at YRS. You did what had to be done, and so Ryan nodded as he watched Jason walk away and disappear back into the house. He looked over at Mike and Chester, the way they were holding hands and licking barbeque sauce off of each other’s fingers, and Ryan’s chest tightened a little bit more. _I can’t wait until that can be us. Free to be together, even with everyone looking._

Brad grabbed a second plate and started to pull his chicken legs off the grill. “Mike, you said you wanted chicken, too, right?” he called over his shoulder. 

“Chicken is perfect for seconds,” Mike said joyfully, the prospect of more food coming his way causing him to giggle. “These ribs are amazing.” He leaned over and kissed the corner of Chester’s mouth, licking a little spot of sauce from his lips. “Just helping you out, you’re a messy rib eater,” he teased, winking at his boyfriend. 

“I won’t deny it,” Chester shot back, his mood light. 

“Alright you two,” Brad said as he turned around with a plate of chicken legs in his hand, “separate for a minute so Mike can try these out. If you think the ribs are good, these will change your life.” He went to hand the plate to Mike, and in the moment their eyes met, Brad suddenly felt something. It was strong, like a blast of cold air as he stood stunned for a second. 

“Oh my God, you just had a vision, didn’t you?” Chester asked, excitement seething from him as his eyes flipped from Brad to Mike. “Was it about Mike?” 

Brad nodded before he took a step back. “I’m so sorry,” he said, his tone dead serious. 

Mike took the plate and set it down, preparing to humor Brad. He knew Chester believed in the visions, but he couldn’t bring himself to take them seriously. With the chicken safely on the table, Mike squinted up at Brad. “Sorry? For what?”

Brad shook his head. “I don’t control the visions, Mike, I just tell people what I see. . .and I see horrible heartbreak in your future. The worst pain you’ve ever felt.” 

“That seems a little dramatic,” Mike said nervously, his eyes flipping to Chester. “Especially because everything is fine. We’re fine.” He looked at Chester for confirmation. 

Chester stood with his hand over his mouth. He couldn’t believe it. It was always terrible when Brad had bad visions, but he never imagined he would have one about Mike. About them. _It’s me. I break Mike’s heart. I’m going to break his heart._ He looked at his boyfriend, and he could tell that Mike was waiting on him to say something, to affirm that the vision meant nothing. “Yeah,” Chester said slowly with a nod. “We’re fine.” 

****  
TBC


	28. Washing It Away

It was late on Sunday evening when Mike unlocked the door to the loft and stepped inside, Chester following behind with his head down. They hadn’t spoken much on the way home, and Mike knew it was his fault. His mind was weighed down with the events of the weekend, and he’d spent the ride home staring blankly out the passenger window of Chester’s car in silence. He wasn’t deliberately being stand-offish. The truth was, he didn’t know what to say. Despite the care he’d taken to try to be respectful toward his boyfriend as they shot their first porn scenes together, Mark had been determined to demean them both.

Mark. Mike twisted his head around to watch Chester close the door behind them. He’d never hated someone as much as he hated the YRS boss. Nothing seemed to satisfy the man, and he and Chester had to redo scene after scene for him over the past two days. Mike hadn’t found an opportunity to question Chester about it yet, as they had both been exhausted at the end of the day and only wanting to collapse in bed together. He wasn’t sure he’d find the strength to bring it up tonight, either. All he wanted right now was a shower to rid himself of the invisible layer of filth he felt on his skin. No matter how hard he tried to compartmentalize what had happened over the weekend, he wasn’t there yet. He didn’t know if he ever _would_ be there. He felt dirty knowing that he’d used private, intimate memories of his life with Chester to get him through the scenes. It wasn’t how he thought it would go at all.

As Chester took a step toward the stairs to take his bag up to their hamper, Mike knew he had to say something to break the somber silence. If he let Chester disappear upstairs without a word, they might not recover the night, and that was the last thing he wanted to have happen. He needed the quiet time with his lover, the kisses and the emotional connection. He needed to set things right between them and not let YRS taint everything.

He was still holding his overnight bag in one hand, but he reached for Chester with the other, his hand glancing off Chester’s forearm as he moved just out of reach. “Hey, Ches?” 

The sound of Mike’s voice brought Chester’s head around. His eyes met those of his boyfriend as he kept quiet, not answering, but waiting to see what was coming. The weekend had been worse than he’d imagined, and he knew they were both tired. They both wanted showers and food, and he wasn’t sure if talking was going to help any of those things. 

Mike slid over and wrapped an arm around Chester’s waist, pulling him close. He felt a sudden wave of emotion grip him as he looked into Chester’s sorrowful eyes. He knew the next moments were critical to how the rest of their week would go, but the words were sticking in his throat. For a long second, he just flexed his fingers softly against Chester’s back while they looked at each other. There was a lot that was not being said on both sides, but he needed to change that. “Ches, I’m so glad we’re home. Let’s take it easy tonight, what do you think? Maybe take a shower together and have dinner in bed.” Usually showers and dinner in bed meant sex, but he was all tapped out at the moment, and figured Chester was too. “I just want to wrap my arms around you and feel you close. I know we’ve been together all weekend, but… I’ve missed you.” 

The slight tension in Chester’s shoulders dropped as Mike mentioned liking being home and food. Those were always Chester’s two biggest emotions whenever he’d come home from YRS. The sanctuary of home, and the comfort of his own kitchen and cooking or even take out. Something he got to pick, not just whatever was served to him from the YRS pre-planned menu. _And him. It was always such a relief, such a saving grace, to come home to him._ But now they were coming home together after they’d both been through the ringer at YRS, and somehow it felt different. 

“A shower sounds great,” Chester answered, a sigh following his words. “I’m hungry, but tired. It was a lot of redos this morning. Dinner in bed sounds about right.” 

Mike felt his cheeks coloring with embarrassment. “I’m sorry about the redos. I know that’s my fault. I, I’m just not… it will get better, I promise.” 

“It’s not your fault,” Chester assured him. “Mark’s always like that. It wasn’t that many more than normal, it just felt heavier this time.” He paused for a moment, rethinking his wording. He didn’t want to make Mike feel bad. “You know, for a newbie, you actually did pretty well. I’ve worked with a lot of -” He stopped, the sentence _I’ve worked with a lot of new guys before_ never leaving his mouth. He knew Mike didn’t want to hear that, even as a compliment. “I’ve just had to do more than today. But, I told you Mark’s a slave driver. Especially about cum shots. He always makes us redo them a dozen times to get the right lighting and angles and emotion.” He shrugged his shoulders. “That’s where the money is.” 

_I’ve worked with a lot of… that’s not a sentence I want to hear again. I don’t want to know. I don’t want to know anything about anyone else, or how many times he’s had to do anything. It’s enough to know how many times we had to redo things. I can’t think about the other. It doesn’t matter. It’s only me now._ Mike closed his eyes for a quick second, a hard swallow following. The thought of how many times they’d had to get each other off for the cameras made his stomach turn. Something about it didn’t seem right. Something was off, but he hadn’t quite put his finger on it yet. “I don’t know, babe. It doesn’t seem that hard to get the correct angles if you know what you’re doing behind the camera. For as many scenes as they shoot in a week, you’d think Jason would be better at…”

Mike trailed off as he suddenly realized what had been bothering him since yesterday morning. That one thing that just didn’t feel right about the re-takes, the scenes they’d been asked to redo. Jason wasn’t in there filming. Only Mark. It had just been them and Mark, and there had been far less instruction than had happened when Jason was filming. Mark had been quiet behind the camera, only calling out a few directions as they went.

He looked at Chester, who didn’t seem the least bit flustered about the scenes they’d redone. “It was just Mark,” he said, taking a step back so he could see Chester better. “When we re-did all those cum shots, Ches, it was just Mark in the room. Why?”

Chester shrugged again. “It’s always Mark filming the redos. It’s because he likes things a certain way, especially on the cum shots. Like I said, it’s where the money is. It usually takes him a few times to move us right into the positions he likes to make his vision work, or whatever,” he said, a casual eyeroll following his words. “He was actually a little less hands on this time,” he added as he thought back over their very long Saturday and even to the earlier hours of that very day. “Sometimes he’ll redo something three times and barely move us at all, but he says it makes a difference to the overall outcome. I don’t question it. He’s going to shoot it till he loves it anyway.” 

There was a prickle of apprehension on Mike’s skin, like the hairs on his skin were standing up, as he listened to Chester explain. It didn’t sound right, what he was saying, but Mike wasn’t sure how to get Chester to listen to his thoughts without getting defensive about it. Maybe it would be different now that they were in it together, and he wasn’t just being critical of Chester’s job. Maybe he’d really listen to what Mike had to say. 

“I don’t know, that feels off to me,” he said cautiously. “And what do you mean, less hands on?” Mike was having trouble wrapping his head around the idea of Chester thinking it was okay to have Mark touch him at all, ever. The thought of Mark running his hand down Chester’s sweaty, post-sex backside made him angry all over again. “Do you mean like how he was touching you after we finished the first shoot on Friday?” 

The question caught Chester by surprise, and he shook his head. “No, not like that,” he stated. “I mean like in the scene. He’ll physically move us around to get us exactly where we need to be.” He rolled his hand through the air for emphasis. “Like, if he wants our legs spread further apart, or more arch in our backs, or a different place on the floor, bed, whatever,” he explained. “It’s how redos are. It’s tedious.” 

Mike didn’t know what to say, but he knew for certain that if Mark touched him, or touched Chester again in front of him, it wouldn’t end well. He didn’t consider himself physically confrontational, but he could easily see it going that way with Mark - even though he would lose. He shook his head at Chester and asked, “why do you think ours were different? He didn’t touch either of us.” 

Chester smiled as he reached over and tapped Mike’s chin with his fist. “Maybe because you’re a born natural, Sexy Boy.” 

“I know it’s not that,” Mike said, a bit of a smile reaching his lips too. “I think it’s strange for him to be filming us alone. I think the next time he’s wanting redos, I’ll mention the filming might go smoother if Jason did it. He seems to know his way around the camera better.”

Chester let out a sigh, his smile vanishing as he dropped his bag from his shoulder to the floor with a _thud_. He walked over to the couch and collapsed before he sat forward, his elbows on his knees. “Don’t,” he said, his voice hitting a serious note. “Mike, don’t make trouble. You saw what happens when Mark gets mad.” He motioned out in front of them at nothing. “Mark does the redos, it’s just how it’s done. It’s normal YRS policy. We all do it, it’s fine.” 

This wasn’t how Mike wanted the conversation to go, but they were in the thick of it now, so he didn’t stop himself from saying, “yeah, I saw what happens when he gets mad. He grabs the first person that comes along, and then what? Everyone just acts like nothing is happening. Why? Chester, the thought of him doing that to you makes me want to kill him.” Mike took another step back as he listened to himself, as he noticed the hand not holding his bag balled into a fist. It wasn’t healthy, what he was thinking and saying. “I, I don’t mean that,” he said quietly, looking at the floor. “But I don’t like it, I don’t like anything about it. I don’t like how I feel right now, and all I can think is, was it better for you, Ches? Was the fact that it was me better? Because that’s the only reason I’m doing this and I don’t think I can go back if I made it worse. I’m not trying to make trouble.” 

He dropped his bag next to Chester’s and kneeled on the floor in front of him. Mike didn’t know if he should reach for his boyfriend or not, but the way Chester was slumped over cut straight to his heart. He tentatively reached both hands out to cup Chester’s knees, gently stroking his thumbs over his kneecaps. “I promise you, I’m just trying to make things better for you. I’m sorry if I’m not.” He ducked to try to catch Chester’s gaze but his boyfriend’s eyes were tightly closed.

Chester’s head dropped a little as he ran a hand over his fading mohawk. “We don’t talk about it, Mike,” he mumbled before he looked back up at his lover. “Things with Mark, we just don’t. We all go through it, and we all understand. You don’t, and you never will because you’ll never be in that position. Not like us.” He took a deep breath the moment he realized the sharp tone in his voice. He looked away for a second, letting his eyes go across the loft and out the windows at the sunset that was just starting. Soon the sky would be filled with soft pinks and oranges, and he didn’t want to be fighting with Mike when that happened. “I’m glad you’re there in one way,” he admitted honestly. “Even though there’s lots of people there all the time, it’s a really lonely place. Having you there makes me feel like I’m not in it alone. I guess that’s selfish.” He ducked his eyes for a second before adding, “I don’t blame you if you don’t go back.” 

“That’s just it, though, Ches. I have to go back. I have to be there with you, there’s no fucking way I’m letting you walk back in that place knowing what I know now.” He hated the rollercoaster of emotions he’d been on all weekend, and Mike could feel his eyes starting to tear up. “You’re mine, not anyone else’s, and if you have to do this, it’s going to be with me. I know I’m awful at it, and I can’t separate home and work the way you do, but I’m not going to let you go back there alone.” He was still lightly touching Chester’s knees, and he didn’t think he should press for more contact just yet. The dynamic between them was still off from the weekend, and he didn’t want to be overbearing.

“That’s the part I like,” Chester said, barely meeting Mike’s dark concerned eyes. “The way you are, the way the contracts are now, I don’t have to worry about who I’m going to be with or what whim will hit Mark.” He let out a hard breath before he licked his lips, his tongue going over his piercing. “Thank you,” he added as he cupped his hand over Mike’s, both their hands resting on Chester’s knee now. “No one’s ever. . .I, I just really appreciate how. . .” He rolled his lips together as he struggled to finish his thought. 

While Chester talked, Mike had been holding his breath without realizing it. His body language screamed ‘hug me’, and Mike wasn’t going to deny Chester anything he needed. With a sigh he stood up and held both arms out. “Come here.”

There was no thought or hesitation as Chester stood up, and went right into Mike’s open arms. He returned his lover’s embrace, his head collapsing into the crook of Mike’s neck. “I love you,” Chester manage to get out, his lips and face pressed to his boyfriend’s warm familiar skin. “Please don’t ever think that I don’t.” 

Mike closed his eyes and held on tightly. “I love you, too. Thinking about you and me, that was the only way I got through the weekend. Knowing we were coming back here, together.” He turned his chin, seeking Chester’s lips for a slow, warm kiss. It was what made him complete, the thing he’d been missing all weekend. There had been so little opportunity for kissing, and Mike wanted more. One of his hands slid up Chester’s back and found his neck, his fingers softly feathering over the skin there as he relished the closeness of their joined lips.

Chester’s eyes shut, his mind drifting off in peace as he let himself be taken in by Mike’s love. By his caress and warm parts. He wanted their kiss to last longer, and even when Mike seemed to be ready to pull back, Chester dropped his hand to Mike’s bottom, just to hold him in place for a few seconds more. Seconds that meant the world. 

When they did separate, Chester felt his whole body relaxing. They were home. It was just them. No Mark. No cameras. No demands. “I need to shower,” he said, a soft smile prying at his lips as he trailed a finger around Mike’s backside. “You said you were up for joining me, right?” 

“There is nothing I want to do more right now than run my hands all over your soapy body,” Mike confirmed. “Except maybe kiss you. I might want to do that more. Kiss you _while_ running my hands all over your soapy body.” He mirrored Chester’s smile as he bent over and picked up both their bags. “Come on, I’ll even let you pick out my pajamas and match them to my underwear, since I know how much you like that.” 

Chester’s eyes brightened as he followed Mike up the stairs. “Really? Because this could be a whole new world for you, Sexy Boy, the world of matching.” He was practically bouncing as he grabbed the back of Mike’s shirt, while they made it up the last few steps, like they were elephants in a herd, latched onto each other’s tails. 

Mike laughed as he felt Chester’s hand wrap into the back of his shirt. “I’ve matched before, I think. Way back, when we first started dating. I tried. But then I realized it just wasn’t me. And if you were gonna fall in love with me, I wanted it to really be me, not who I thought you wanted me to be.” He dropped the bags next to the bed and turned quickly to steal another quick kiss. “I guess maybe I made the right choice, huh?” 

Chester tilted his head, his eyebrow cocking. “You tried to match? I don’t remember that,” he said with a snicker. 

“But I did!” Mike protested. “I wore blue underwear with a blue shirt, or something like that. Maybe blue shoes? I don’t know,” he admitted. “It must not have been very good if you don’t remember. Whatever,” he shrugged, letting go and pushing his boyfriend gently toward the crammed closet. “You know I don’t care. But pick me out anything and I’ll wear it.” 

The thought of playing dress up with Mike was enticing, but Chester’s mind had already jumped two steps ahead as he spun around and took his boyfriend by both hands. “I’ll tell you what I _do_ remember thinking when we first started dating. I remember thinking that you were a wreck, fashion wise,” he said, a jovial grin stretching his features as he maneuvered Mike back a step or two, “and that despite that, you still turned me on like a beast.” He moved him back one more step, and Mike’s legs hit the bed, and they both fell forward, Chester falling on top of his lover. They laughed for a moment, before Chester nuzzled his nose into the side of Mike’s face. “And the best outfit to wear to bed is your birthday suit.” 

Mike slid both hands up the back of Chester’s shirt, loving the feel of his warm skin. “You’re always trying to get me to sleep naked.” He narrowed his eyes thoughtfully, trying not to laugh as Chester watched him with unmistakable excitement on his face. “I tell you what. I’ll give it a try tonight, but only if you’ll make me some bacon when we get out of the shower. I want mac and cheese and bacon in bed, and in exchange, I’ll sleep naked for you.” He smiled, proud of himself as he watched Chester lick his lips.

“Deal,” Chester agreed as he kissed Mike’s jawline quickly before he stood up and offered Mike a hand up. “I can go for mac and cheese and bacon.” He absently rubbed his stomach before he flipped his eyes sharply in Mike’s direction. “And I still get to pick out your pre-naked outfit, right?” 

“Of course,” Mike said as he let himself be pulled up. “I’d never deny you such a great pleasure.” He stood by and watched as Chester fussed over their clothes before they headed downstairs, two perfectly coordinated outfits in hand. 

****

It wasn’t the first time that Chester had shared his shower time with Mike, but today felt different. They had undressed together, their clothes from earlier in the hamper upstairs, and their clean clothes were stacked on the bathroom counter. Chester had turned on the shower, making sure the temperature was just right before he’d stepped in and waited. 

Mike had watched him for a few seconds, mumbling about making sure the water wasn’t too hot, and after Chester assured him it was fine, he stepped into the floor to ceiling structure, with the rain water shower head overtop them, and the river rock pebbled floor under their feet. 

“Turn around,” Chester had suggested first. He watched as Mike did so without arguing, and Chester found himself staring at Mike’s wet, clean back. His skin was a little paler there, a consequence from all his flannel wearing habits. His shoulder blades were defined, his lower back smooth with just the slightest curve at his tailbone, leading to his ass. Chester felt his insides stir a little as he soaked in the sight of his lover. Despite all their nakedness over the weekend, Mike’s back wasn’t something he’d gotten to see much of. His hand instinctively reached out, ready to touch the skin he loved, but he stopped himself. 

_If I touch him like that, it’s just going to lead to frustration. Usually showers together automatically mean more, but I know we’re both tired, and he already said he didn’t want to do that tonight. I shouldn’t be starting anything._ He took a deep breath, and instead of feeling up his boyfriend’s backside, he grabbed his favorite poofy, ball-shaped blue bath sponge and squirted a mound of peachy smelling body wash on it. A smile cracked his lips as he held it up to the back of Mike’s head. “Your hair almost matches my sponge,” he giggled. 

Mike shook his head, droplets of water flying from his soaked hair. “Only you would think of that.” He glanced over his shoulder, trying to see what Chester had in mind. “What are you up to back there?”

“I’m going to wash your back, and other such places,” Chester said, holding up his sponge. “We are in the shower.” 

“I know where we are,” Mike chuckled. “I just never know with you. You said turn around and I did, but how am I supposed to know that your intentions are innocent?” He leaned forward and put his hands on the smooth tile of the shower wall. “Think you can reach everything like this?” He smirked, even though Chester couldn’t see him. 

Chester’s hand tightened on his sponge as he watched Mike lean forward, his ass sticking out a little more. _Is he trying to torture me?_ He waited a moment, reminding himself that yes, this was all supposed to be innocent tonight. “Please,” he said, ignoring the slight crack in his voice. “You said we’re taking it easy, and that’s what we’re doing. And yeah, I think I can reach everything.” He lifted his head, letting the warm rain water fall on his face for a second before he wiped it away, and concentrated back on his task. 

He started at Mike’s shoulders, scrubbing the soapy sponge over each inch, first the left side and then the right before he pulled it down the center of Mike’s back. “How’s that feel? Let me know if I scrub too hard.”

Mike’s thoughts were calm for the first time since they’d left for YRS Friday. His eyes were closed as Chester’s bath puff roamed over his skin. The only thing that would feel better would be if his boyfriend’s hands were on him, rubbing away the tension from the weekend. But he’d said they were going to take it easy, and if they started rubbing all over each other, that would only lead one place. So he simply said, “feels good, Ches. I could stand here and let you do that all day.” As the bubbles spread in circles around his back, he added, “I won’t though. I’ll have to do it to you so you can feel good too. You know… when you’re done.” 

Chester only smiled. He loved that he was making his boyfriend feel better. He knew the weekend had been hard, hard on them both but he had to guess that it was worse for Mike. He made sure every piece of Mike’s back was touched by his sponge, that the soapy bubbles were spread wide and far before he dropped the activity down to Mike’s ass. 

“Wait,” Chester mumbled as he pulled away. “Gotta re-soap.” He grabbed his bottle of body wash and after squirting a bit more on his sponge, he went back to work. He slid it up, down, and around Mike’s right butt cheek, and then across the crack to get to the other one, all the while forcing himself to keep his other hand in check. _I know this is good for him. He was so stressed all weekend. Now he understands what it’s like to have Mark barking orders like a drill sergeant. But he’ll get used to it. We all get used to it. . .or maybe he won’t. He mentioned lawyers to Mark while we were in his office. What lawyers? Maybe he was just talking shit. Or maybe he knows some. Lawyers are expensive._

Chester let out a soft sigh as his thoughts felt heavy. He washed his lover’s body, pouring worship on it as he slid the sponge between Mike’s legs, and then down to one of his thighs. He’d have to squat to do the rest of the job properly, and even as he kept replaying the worst parts of the weekend over and over in his mind - Mark yelling, Mike worrying about their room at YRS not having a lock, or when Brad made that horrible prediction about his boyfriend going through a massive heartbreak sometime in the future, Chester wanted to make this moment stress free. He wanted to do his best, and wash Mike’s body clean from all things YRS. 

The sponge traveled down, and so did Chester. Mike’s eyes cracked open as the soapy puff hit his calf, and he bit his lip and looked down under his arm, sneaking a peek at what was going on behind him. It struck him in that moment that there was nothing sexual between them as Chester covered every inch of his body with bubbles. Every place he dragged the sponge felt relaxed, like the bubbles were magic, and Mike closed his eyes again and let the calming sensations cover him. It was so good to be home, to be alone in their space with no danger of anyone stumbling onto their intimate moments. _I hate being there. I want this, just me and Chester, all the time. I don’t want to look around and wonder where he’s been and who he’s been with. Everything is safe here. It’s our space, our memories, just us. This is what I want, more moments like this._

“I love you,” he said, and it didn’t feel like enough. There weren’t words to explain all the emotions he was feeling on this Sunday night, and it was useless to try. Instead, Mike turned around slowly and reached down to touch Chester’s shoulder. “Come here.” 

Chester looked up, his eyes partially closed as the water fell from above. He maneuvered himself back on his feet and stood up, his sponge still hand. “Want me to do your front too?” 

Mike slid his hand around Chester’s wet waist and pulled him close. “Not yet,” he said, sliding his fingers over the slippery skin of Chester’s back while he reached for the bath sponge with the other. He wanted to take his turn now. “I thought we could switch off. I want my turn.” Mike pecked a sweet kiss to the corner of Chester’s lips and let go, pushing on his side gently to make him turn around. “You don’t mind, right?” 

Chester let out a laugh. “Mind? Do I mind you washing me all over? Of course not, Sexy Boy.” He leaned forward, placing his hands on the shower wall, just like Mike had done. “Wash away,” he called over his shoulder. 

Mike started the whole thing with innocent intentions. He poured more body wash on the sponge, squishing it in his hand to work up a froth of bubbles before he started at one shoulder and gently scrubbed up the length of one arm. Reaching all the way to Chester’s wrist required him to move closer to his boyfriend’s wet, naked body than he really needed to be. There was an inch of space between them when Mike dragged the sponge back down, and he couldn’t help but reach to leave a quick kiss on the other, not soapy side of Chester’s neck before he ran the sponge up the other arm. He watched as the soap dripped in small rivers down Chester’s arms, leaving white trails across his tattoos. With his free hand he traced one of the rivers with his finger tip, all the way back to his boyfriend’s neck. He saw the shiver his touch caused and he took an immediate step back with a quiet “I’m sorry.” It was too hard, but so important, to keep everything simple tonight. _Look at me, not able to keep the line between sex and intimacy. I never thought that was a problem for me. It’s a total change from when we first started dating, like everything now always has to lead to sex. I don’t want it to be like that when we come back from YRS, from being instructed and watched all weekend. I don’t want him to think that’s all I want from him._

Chester’s fingers dug into the white subway tiles of the shower wall, his legs tense the moment Mike’s finger had trailed up to his neck. His eyes were closed as his boyfriend pressed behind him, but a moment later he felt Mike’s absence as he heard his lover apologize. Chester took a few deep breaths. _Is it wrong I wanted him to keep going? No, not wrong. But not tonight. He was right before. We need a break from it, or it might get weird. Maybe. I’ve never dated anyone I worked with. . .is there a line we need to keep? I guess this is the line right here. It’s good. Lines are good._

“Here,” Mike mumbled, grabbing Chester’s hand and pressing the sponge into it. He didn’t give Chester time to ask questions before he had both hands on his warm skin, smearing the leftover bubbles around with his fingers, pressing his thumbs into the muscles on his boyfriend’s back. The combination of the water and the soap made his grip slippery, and a smile stretched over Mike’s face as he tried to keep his hands in contact. He dug in a little bit harder with his thumbs between Chester’s shoulder blades, working out the tightness there. “How’s that feel?” 

Chester’s head had dropped as he enjoyed Mike’s massaging hands. “Don’t stop,” he said, unsure if his voice could even be heard over the running water. He didn’t know what his boyfriend was going for, and he didn’t care. It felt good, and unlike the last few days, they were alone and in a safe place. Mike could touch him wherever he wanted. 

Mike let his hands slide down both sides of Chester’s spine, pulling his thumbs along the outline of the bones there and feeling the muscle there give just a little under his touch. It felt so good just to touch, to enjoy the feel of each other without expectations. Without thinking he leaned in and planted a kiss on the back of his lover’s neck, then another, and as he massaged down Chester’s back, he had to remind himself that this wasn’t going to go anywhere. Not tonight. 

He took a step back and took Chester’s elbow in his hand, maneuvering him around so he could finally catch his lips for a slow kiss. As the space closed between them, he couldn’t help it when his hands slid down to cup Chester’s ass and pull them together. The water was relaxing and warm and everything about his boyfriend felt so right, alone there in the shower. He didn’t hold on too hard, making sure that Chester could pull out of his grip any time he wanted to. After all, this was supposed to just be a relaxing shower before dinner. 

Chester dropped his sponge, the small _plop_ it made as it hit the floor of the shower barely registering in his brain as he wrapped his arms around Mike’s neck. His eyes were shut as he kissed his boyfriend, as he let himself be swallowed by Mike’s love. The water was still decently warm, and Mike’s body was even warmer as they pressed together. Chester felt the slight tickle of arousal start in his lower half, which was his signal to smile, and pull back from the kiss. “I thought we were just trying to get clean,” he offered, his lovestruck grin remaining. 

“I missed kissing you,” Mike said simply, reaching to take Chester’s lips with his again, the water on their faces dripping down and getting in the way. He flipped Chester’s lip ring before he slid his tongue forward again, tasting water and Chester, and loving every second of their connection. He didn’t have to hide his emotions right here, right now, but he did want to hide in the shower forever and never stop what they were doing. 

Mike turned Chester’s back into the water and let his skin turn pink and warm before he broke the kiss and took a step back, running a hand through his wet hair. “I’m sorry, I just, I can’t explain it. I just _need_ you, but not in that, I feel like I need to fuck your brains out sort of way. I need you close. I need to touch you and know that we’re okay, even after this weekend. It sounds stupid, probably.” He trailed a finger down the center of Chester’s body and ended at his navel, never taking his eyes off the skin he was touching. “Do you understand what I mean at all?” 

“Yes,” Chester answered, keeping his word choice slim as he took the step forward, his arms going around Mike’s neck, and putting their lips together next. He shut his eyes as his fingers ran up the back of Mike’s wet hair, as his hips pressed against his lover’s wet body. If Mike needed kisses, he’d give kisses. Whatever needed to happen, Chester was up for it. He loved his boyfriend, and if he could say some sort of magic word to make all the bad feelings and uneasiness go away, he would. But until then, he’d give until Mike couldn’t take it anymore. 

He cupped his hand around the back of Mike’s head, pressing his kiss a little deeper, sending his tongue forward to play with Mike’s. He heard himself moan, which was unintentional, and along with it, his other hand dropped down Mike’s wet side. 

For a few more minutes, Mike let it go, losing himself in their intimacy, letting Chester’s hands move over his body and sending his own to do the same. As the kisses got longer and deeper, the thought crossed through his mind that he might not be able to stop soon if they kept this up, and besides that, the hot water was sure to run out before too much longer. He dropped his hands to cover Chester’s, gently stopping their exploration of his body as he pulled away from the kiss, coming back two more times for quick pecks to the corner of Chester’s mouth. “I love this, but we should get out. The water is going to turn cold, and I might not be able to stop myself from taking you right here.”

Chester’s lips were barely parted as he breathed. He could see the look of struggle on Mike’s face - the dual desires that were shifting back and forth, and his dark eyes that said more than his words. “Okay,” Chester agreed as Mike let his hands go free. “You can get out. I still have some washing to do first.” 

“You do not. You’re perfectly clean. I did an excellent job with your bath puff.” Mike pointed a finger at Chester’s body, a half smile on his lips. “C’mon, turn that water off and let’s go make some mac and cheese.” 

Chester glanced around the shower, until he spotted his discarded sponge. He quickly scooped it from the ground and hung in up on the hook connected to the wall before he turned the water off. The bathroom was suddenly much quieter, the only sound coming from the fan running overhead. “Oh, I see,” he said, a twitch of laughter in his voice as he ran a hand through his soaking wet hair, “you think you’re an expert at washing me now, don’t you?”

As his gaze traveled over Chester’s messy hair and smiling wet face, Mike felt his heart swelling with love. He adored everything about the man in front of him, giving him a hard time over nothing. “Of course I’m an expert now, in all things Chester Bennington,” he said with a cheesy grin. “Washings included.” 

“Mhm,” Chester agreed in his ornery way. “I’m glad to know I mean enough to you for you to take the time to learn all things Chester Bennington.” He reached out, and ran a single finger down Mike’s wet, naked chest. He could feel the dampness of his skin, and see the look in his boyfriend’s dark eyes. . .he was beautiful, even with soggy looking blue hair and the slump in his posture as the foggy bathroom was quickly turning cold from the lack of steam. “I’m starving,” Chester heard himself mumble. “We need to eat. . .mac and cheese and. . .bacon,” he remembered, the images of crispy, luscious oven cooked bacon stampeding into this thoughts and stomping out everything else. “I’m going to cook us extra bacon. And I’ve got some green onions in the fridge still to garnish everything with.” 

Before Mike could say anything to that, Chester added, “and Vanilla Coke. I want a Vanilla Coke and I think we have ice cream still for dessert.” He stopped a half a breath later when he realized Mike hadn’t moved. His boyfriend was by the shower entrance, but hadn’t taken the step out to lead the way. Chester cocked his head. “What?” 

“Just thinking about how much I love you. And bacon. And then I started thinking how we could put that ice cream _in_ the vanilla coke.” He grinned and stepped out, tossing a towel to Chester and grabbing one for himself. He scrubbed himself dry, watching Chester from the corner of his eye the whole time. He was so ready to eat and crash. 

“Ice cream in the Vanilla Coke?” Chester asked as he dried himself off. “I’m not sure how I feel about that.” He ran the towel a second time over his head, making sure to dry out his mohawk as much as possible before he grabbed his red underwear and matching gray pajama bottoms with the red stripe running up each leg. He scooted Mike out of the way as he grabbed his comb and stood in front of the mirror. It was fogged over still, and even though Mike opened the bathroom door, Chester had to grab his towel and wipe it off so he could see well enough to partially style his damp hair. 

“What do you mean?” Mike said, his expression clearly scandalized. “You’ve never had a Coke float? What’s wrong with you?” He reached over and mussed the hair Chester was trying to comb down. “Leave it. I like it all flat and messy. And you haven’t lived until you’ve put vanilla ice cream in a vanilla Coke. I’ll make them,” he offered decisively, sliding into the gray boxer briefs Chester had picked out to go with his black and gray plaid pajama pants. 

Chester shot him an unsure look before he looked back at his hair. It was out of place, and he knew it would look even wilder once it dried. He went to comb it some more, but stopped. “Fine,” he said, a hitch of playfulness in his voice as he sat his comb down. “My hair will be messy. And no, never heard of a Coke float.” He took another second, watching Mike get dressed in the mirror before he turned around, his ass resting against the countertop. “It will be like we’re having dessert and dinner all at the same time.” 

“Dessert with dinner. Almost as bad as dessert _before_ dinner. You have no food rules, do you?” Mike pulled his black t-shirt over his head and smoothed it down before he took the small step over to stand in front of Chester. He put both hands on the counter at Chester’s sides and leaned forward, tracing the tip of his nose over his boyfriend’s, gently kissing both his chin and then his forehead before he pulled back. “I love that you can be spontaneous, that everything doesn’t have to follow the same routine or schedule all the time. You’re so good for me, that way.”

Chester felt himself smile as he wrapped his bare arms around Mike’s neck. “It takes work to be reckless,” he teased before pressing his lips to his lover’s for a quick peck. “And I’m not totally without rules. But in the kitchen, as long as it tastes good, I’m in.” He thought for a minute, wanting to kiss Mike again, but he didn’t. He could already see that look in Mike’s dark eyes, that soft, silky flare they took on whenever Mike was feeling romantic. _And we’re supposed to be taking it easy._ Chester gave him a last nuzzle, cheek to cheek, before he let go. “Bacon takes time,” he said, his hand pressing on Mike’s chest to get him to back up. “And I’m starving.” 

“I know.” Mike reached for Chester’s hand as he stepped back, pulling him out of the bathroom and toward the kitchen. “Make lots of bacon. I think I want bacon more than the mac and cheese.” He squeezed Chester’s hand and reluctantly let go, turning his attention to the cabinets. There were some tall glasses somewhere that weren’t used very often, but that would be perfect for his Vanilla Coke concoction. _Never had a Coke float. What’s that about? I can’t do much in the kitchen, but I’m gonna make the best Coke floats ever._

He heard Chester rummaging through the refrigerator as he brought two glasses down from the cabinet. “Ches? Will you grab the ice cream while you’re over there?” 

With bacon in hand, Chester nodded. He opened up their freezer and after scooting around the frozen pizzas and the bag of chicken strips, he found the container of vanilla ice cream. He licked his lips, thoughts of chocolate sauce and cherries flooding his mind. “Or,” he said as he turned around, his bounty in hand, “we could -” but he stopped. The moment he saw Mike standing with the two tall glasses in his hands and the smile on his face, Chester couldn’t suggest anything else. “Never mind,” he said as he handed over the ice cream. 

He worked his way around the kitchen, turning on the oven and getting his pan prepared to lay out as many strips of bacon that his boyfriend wanted. “Mike?” he asked, keeping his eyes on what he was doing. 

“Hmm?” Mike hummed, his back to Chester as he dug through the utensil drawer for an ice cream scoop.

“What, a, what do you think about what Brad said? When he saw your future about you going through heartbreak.” Chester paused for a moment, glancing over his shoulder, but Mike looked extremely concentrated on their silverware collection. “You, you haven’t said anything about it.” 

With his hand finally on the ice cream scoop, Mike tapped the drawer shut with his hip and turned around to look at Chester. He shrugged, a mild look of annoyance on his face. “Chester? You believe that stuff? Why? Nobody can see the future. I haven’t said anything because there’s no sense in worrying about something like that. Besides, most of the time when people “see futures” or are “fortune tellers” or whatever, they’re just making vague predictions that you can read into later.” He almost dropped the ice cream scoop as he held it while trying to make air quotations with his fingers. “That’s probably all Brad does. Says some vague stuff that later you think happened. I don’t believe in all that stuff.” Mike tilted his head a little to the side and sized up his boyfriend’s reaction. “But you do, don’t you?” 

Chester pulled his bottom lip in, sucking on his own piercing for a second as he finished laying out the bacon. “I do,” he admitted before he turned to face Mike properly. “And Brad can see the future. He’s been right about a lot of things. He told you that you were going to make a life changing decision, remember?” he asked as he pointed at Mike’s chest. “And then the next morning you signed on with YRS. And he knew we were going to show up for dinner, remember? Even though I wasn’t even supposed to be there. And there’s been other things. He knew when Mark would wreck his Mercedes, and he knew that Phil would quit, which he did,” he told Mike, not really registering that Mike would have no idea who that was. “And, and there’s been tons of other things.” Chester stopped and took a deep breath before he added, “and he told me about you. Or, I’m guessing it’s you.” 

Mike glanced at the bacon, laid out neatly behind Chester, and thought about how this conversation was prolonging the amount of time it would take to make dinner. He sighed and gestured toward the bacon with the ice cream scoop. “You should really worry more about the bacon than Brad. I’m sure most, if not all, of that stuff was coincidental.” He frowned as he bit down on his bottom lip, pulling it back a forth for a moment of thought before he went ahead and asked, his curiosity getting the best of him, “what did he say about me? I mean, before. You said he told you about me?”

Chester picked up the pan of bacon and spun around. He opened the oven and shoved it in, setting the timer on the stove. One part of him didn’t want to tell Mike now. Not after that little speech. But his other part told him not to be childish, and so he rubbed the side of his face for a moment, and then down his still naked shoulder and his elbow. “He told me that the man I’m going to marry will be blue.” He shook his head with a laugh. “I didn’t understand it at the time, but. . .here you are, Mr. Blue Hair.” 

For a split second, Mike was sure his heart stopped beating. “What? He said… what?” He pressed his free hand against his chest, like he was trying to see if everything inside was still working properly. “Marry?” _I’ve never even considered saying those words out loud, and even though it’s just what Brad said, Ches wouldn’t have repeated it if there wasn’t a part of him that thought maybe that would be true, one day. Wow._ He fixed his eyes on Chester’s face, anxious to see what else he would say. If he would laugh off Brad’s prediction, though Mike had a feeling that Chester believed everything the cook had to say about the future. 

Chester nodded as he broke their eye contact. He fetched his favorite medium sized pot from the lower cabinets and found the box of macaroni noodles. “Yeah, marry. It was, uh, a week? Maybe two before we met in karate. We were having mashed potatoes and gravy that night at YRS. . .and meatloaf, I think.” He thought for a moment, all his actions coming to a halt as he stood by the stove with the box of noodles in hand. “Anyway, doesn’t matter. So Brad was making plates and when he poured the gravy over my potatoes, it hit him!” Chester said, raising his voice for emphasis. “And that’s when he told me. He said he saw it in my mashed potatoes and gravy. He said that the man I’m going to marry will be blue. I, I actually thought maybe he meant sad. . .but I don’t think that anymore. When you showed up, I even asked him about it and he said he saw blue the color, not depression. Which is good, right?” he asked as he turned to finally look Mike in the face again. 

_If I say yes, that’s like admitting that I think Brad can see the future. And then what does that mean about this heartbreak? Or maybe that’s a good thing? It means that heartbreak isn’t Chester. Since if his visions come true, I’ll be marrying Chester someday. Marriage. If I say yes, Chester will know I’m okay with thoughts of us getting married someday. And if I say no, he’ll think I don’t want to marry him! Maybe I should just say yes!_ Mike opened his mouth to respond, but his palms felt sweaty and he wasn’t sure his voice would work. “That’s… good?” he croaked out, then cleared his throat. “I mean, if he’s right about the… marriage thing, then he’d have to be wrong about the heartbreak, right?”

Chester dropped his eyes as he shook his head. “I don’t know. I don’t want to be the one who breaks your heart. If I do, I’m sorry. I’ll say it right now,” he said, looking up. “I don’t have a great track record for long lasting relationships, Mike, so it could happen. That’s why I wanted to know what you thought about it.” He turned away and filled the pot with water before he put it back on the stove and turned on the burner. “And, I don’t know. I don’t know how the future works. Maybe because his vision of your heartbreak came after the vision of the blue man, maybe something’s changed. Maybe the future changed,” Chester mumbled as he took a step back from the stove and watched as he waited for the water to boil. 

Mike looked at his boyfriend’s back for a moment, feeling a pinch at his heart when Chester mentioned the future could have changed. He didn’t want the future to change. He closed the space between them with a few steps and leaned his chin onto Chester’s shoulder, looking down into the pot of water with him. Wrapping the hand holding the ice cream scoop around his waist, Mike closed his eyes and said, “I don’t want you to think I’m saying we should do it any time soon or anything, but I can see us together, Ches. Don’t think I’m crazy when I say I’d marry you someday. Heartbreak can come in all kinds of forms, but I don’t think it’s going to happen to us.” He kissed the side of Chester’s neck tenderly, in the curve where his shoulder and neck met. “We’re stronger than that. I know it. And I don’t need a future seeing cook to tell me that.” 

Chester cupped his hand over Mike’s. “So you’re saying you do believe he can see the future then?” A partial smile was already crossing Chester’s face as he turned around. “I knew it. Just wait, Sexy Boy, you’ll eventually get a lot more predictions. Although, I’m still not sure about that one he gave us. . .about me being in a flannel shirt. I can’t see that _ever_ happening.” 

A small laugh bubbled out of Mike’s chest and he smiled as he turned his attention to the ice cream on the counter. “I better get on these Coke floats before the ice cream melts away. And you never know about flannels, you might discover how sensible and attractive they are.” He caught Chester’s sideways glance and winked at him before he grabbed the ice cream and pried the lid off the container. “Now, as far as believing, I guess we’ll have to wait and see what happens.” 

The water had started to boil, and after adding a pinch of salt, Chester dumped the noodles in and turned down the heat as he set a mental timer in his head. “Nope. Never wearing a flannel. It’s against my very being,” he said, playfully. “And marriage. . .” He shrugged as he watched Mike scoop ice cream into the tall glasses, “I never thought about it for myself. Well, until Brad told me what he did. But, I don’t know, I guess I haven’t seen too many examples of good marriages in my life. Mom and Dad seemed to be happy, until Dad was gone and we found out he’d been lying for years. And Mark and Jason,” he said with a hiss, “don’t even get me started on that mess. I don’t want to be in anything like that. In either case. Just think, if Mark and Jason weren’t married and didn’t own a business together, then Jason could just walk away. That’s a lot of freedom to give up for a piece of paper, don’t you think?” 

Mike kept his eyes on the ice cream. “Is that really what you think? That being married is giving up your freedom? It doesn’t have to be that way, not if you take the time to really know someone, to be certain and be willing to grow and change with someone before you commit to them. And as far as Mark and Jason go, if Jason really wanted out that badly, all he’d have to do is hire a lawyer and leave. I know you’ve said it before, but do you really think the business is what is keeping them married? People with more than they have get divorced all the time.” He paused, sizing up the ice cream in the glasses. It was enough, and he put the lid back on the carton and went to put it back in the freezer. “Not that I’m advocating divorce. I would like to think I’d be one hundred percent certain before I ever committed to marriage. I don’t want to go back on my promise to love and be with someone until the very end… but if Jason is that unhappy, and in love with Ryan, maybe he should really think about leaving.” 

He opened the refrigerator next and pulled out two Vanilla Cokes. “Are you ready for this magic?” he asked, pointing the cans at the glasses full of ice cream.

Chester rubbed his elbows as he nodded. _Jason can’t leave. I know Mike doesn’t understand. He hasn’t been there. He hasn’t been there with us. He doesn’t have any idea how things really get around there. How Mark gets. Lawyers. That seems to be Mike’s answer to everything. It doesn’t work that way. And Mark has his own lawyers that would rip us all apart, and Jason knows that better than anyone._ Chester rolled his lips together for a second before he mumbled, “Jason tried to leave once. Mark went and got him though, and brought him back. We didn’t see him for a few weeks after that. He hasn’t really been the same since.”

Mike cocked an eyebrow at Chester as he popped the tabs on both Coke cans. “What do you mean? You didn’t see him? Around the house, like, at all?” He set one can on the counter and picked up a glass with the free hand, tilting it on an angle to pour the liquid over the ice cream without excess fizz. 

Chester shrugged his shoulders as he watched the bubbles and the way the dark cola stained the white ice cream. “We knew Mark had brought him back, but we didn’t see him at all. And then when we did see him, he was,” he paused for a second letting out a sigh, “different.” 

Repeating the process with the second can and glass, Mike frowned as he thought things over. Being different could mean any number of things. Without meaning to, he started defending Jason’s absence. “Maybe he was embarrassed or something. Knowing you all knew what had happened. Or maybe he _did_ contact a lawyer and found out it wasn’t going to be as easy as he thought it would be, leaving. I don’t know. You make it sound like something sinister happened. I don’t know. What do you mean when you say different? Define different.” He stuck a straw in the glass and handed Chester both the tall glass and the leftover Vanilla Coke still in the can. “Try it,” he urged.

Chester glanced at his boiling noodles before he took the Coke float. He sucked on his straw, trying to gage how much he’d get in one shot since he’d never had one before. Spitting it out or even bearing it and swallowing it down would be easier with a smaller amount. The cold, sweet mixture hit his tongue, and instead of spitting, he smiled. “That is good,” he said, offering Mike a happy glance. “But really sweet.” He took another few swallows, loving the sheer cold factor of it, before he set it down and turned his attention back to the oven. He could smell the bacon, and by that alone he knew it was time to pull his noodles off and turn them into mac and cheese. 

He fetched the hand strainer from one of the cabinets as he said, “He was quieter. Jason, I mean. Before he was a lot more like Mark. Really bossy. Pushy. A slave driver all his own. Ryan says that he snapped. That he just broke and couldn’t take it anymore, and that’s why he left. That’s when Mark decided they should have an open marriage. I think maybe he thought it would make things easier somehow, even though Mark can’t stand it when Jason’s the one being open.” He rolled his eyes before he added, “The whole thing is seriously fucked up.” He let the hot steaming noodles sit in the strainer for a minute as he turned to face Mike. “It wasn’t until after that, when he was back and _different_ , that he hooked up with Ryan. We’re pretty sure he’s never going to try and leave again. At least not anytime soon. He’s like one of us now.” 

Mike leaned against the counter and sucked down a fair amount of his drink while he thought. He watched Chester with his noodles and tried to imagine what would lead someone to have an affair rather than leave. Leaving seemed so much easier. It was black and white. If you’re not happy, you leave. He turned everything over in his head a few times before he commented, “different. One of you. Do you mean he’s afraid of Mark? I can see that, I saw it when Mark took Ryan to his room after the shoot. He was too afraid to intervene, and I can tell you right now, Ches, if that had been you, nothing would have stopped me from getting you away from him. What’s he afraid of, Chester?” 

Mike stayed where he was, against the counter, but he eyed Chester intently. _We’ve talked about Mark and Jason before and none of this stuff has come up. He’s always blowing things off and downplaying what’s happening at work. He brushed me off when I asked about Mark a few days ago, and this all sounds a lot worse than he’s trying to make it seem. I wish he’d just tell me how things really are. I wish I didn’t have to drag it out of him._ Mike took a deep breath and decided to just get all the information he needed at once. He wasn’t playing games with the secrets of YRS anymore. “I asked you before, if Mark was violent. If he’d ever hit you, and you didn’t answer me. Not directly, anyway. So, I’m asking you again. Has he? Has he ever hit you?” 

Chester caught Mike’s dark eyes for a moment before he looked away and headed for the refrigerator. He needed the cheese and the milk and butter. He needed to get their food finished so they could eat, and they could leave this conversation behind. He stood staring at the food, at their clean refrigerator shelves and the stacks of lunch meats and cheeses. At the bottles of condiments and the gallon of milk. He could feel the cool air coming from it as the light made the entire area inside the fridge look like it was illuminated. 

But he knew he couldn’t stand there forever. So he grabbed what he needed, and shut the door. He knew Mike was still waiting for an answer, and he wouldn’t be able to shrug it off this time. “We don’t talk about it,” he said first as he sat everything down on the counter. “It’s not something that happens a lot. But yeah, sometimes.” He kept his head down and his voice soft as he said, “this will be ready in just a minute.” 

Mike really didn’t know what to say, now that it was out in the open. He closed his eyes for a minute, the taste of his Vanilla Coke float suddenly not so sweet anymore. Protecting Chester from this guy was going to be a lot harder than he’d initially thought, and the desire to protect his boyfriend, his lover, his best friend, was like a raging wildfire. The thought of anyone laying a hand on Chester was sickening, but it was far worse to know how trapped they were under layers of legalese in their lengthy contracts. 

“Ches, God, babe? Why didn’t you tell me? I don’t care that you don’t talk about it there, why didn’t you tell me? It’s just me.” He stole a glance at his boyfriend from under half closed eyes, taking in his defeated posture and the way his back was still to him. It wouldn’t take much to reach over and pull Chester into his arms, but he wasn’t sure that’s what he should do. Part of him felt like he should be outraged instead of offering comfort. 

Chester finished mixing in the butter and milk before he added the cheese, stirring the whole pot with a large wooden spoon. He knew if he turned around right now, Mike would be looking at him. He’d be looking at him with a _poor-Chester_ look, and that’s exactly what he didn’t want. Instead, he let out a long breath, and peered into the oven. A smile slid across his lips before he turned around and announced, “It’s done.” He grabbed his lobster claw oven mitt and took the pan of bacon out, setting it on the stove top. “And it’s not a big deal,” he said as he tossed his oven mitt to the side and went to get bowls for the two of them. “I said it doesn’t happen often. He just flies off the handle sometimes and if you happen to be the one that’s there, then, that’s just how it is.” He tossed Mike a quick look before adding, “I got two years left. _We_ have two years left. Two years isn’t so long,” he decided, even as his voice dropped off into nothing. 

Sitting his glass down with a sigh, Mike pushed off the countertop and turned to open the flatware drawer, taking out two spoons. “I meant it when I said I’d kill him if he touched you again. I mean, I wouldn’t _kill_ him, but something bad would happen, I know it. Jason isn’t my problem, and neither is anyone else at YRS. And two years is going to feel like forever, I can already tell.” He offered Chester the spoons and slid one arm around his back, pressing close to his boyfriend’s side and watching him dish out the mac and cheese. “I’m not going to lie and say that I like it there, but I’ll do whatever it takes to keep you mine. And I don’t want you to worry about Mark. I won’t let you out of my sight while we’re there.” 

The bowls were full, but Chester didn’t move. Instead he let himself lean against Mike’s body. “I hate that you’re there. But I love that you’re there, too. I don’t want you to go through any of the shit me the others have. I’m hoping. . .I’m hoping Mark will really do what he says. Speaking of that, what did you mean when you told him you’d hire lawyers? You don’t really know any lawyers, do you?” He turned his head and kissed Mike’s cheek before he pulled away, announcing he needed to crumble the bacon so they could finally eat. 

Chester’s question surprised Mike for a moment until he realized, they had never discussed his parents in any sort of detail. He snagged a piece of bacon from the pan and rolled his eyes. “My parents. My fantastic, homophobic, abandoning parents are both lawyers. Or were. They took off for Colorado and I’m not sure if either of them are still practicing anymore. Or if they would help me out even if I really needed it.” 

Chester stopped mid-crumble to look at his lover. “Really?” he asked, sliding the salty meat between his fingertips as he thought. He’d never imagined that Mike’s parents would be lawyers. _I always figured they’d be, like, office people. Or lab people. People who poke you with things._ “How come you never told me?” 

Mike picked up his Coke float and took a sip, the sweetness contrasting nicely with the salty bacon taste left on his tongue. “You know I hate talking about them. They might as well not even exist at this point. They haven’t even tried to stay in touch, you know? What kind of parents do that?” There were too many heavy emotions wrapped around everything they’d been through and talked about this weekend, and Mike could feel the fatigue starting to take over as he tried to explain about his parents. “I didn’t turn out to be what they expected, what they wanted a son to be… nothing but a disappointment they could leave behind without a second thought. I’m sure if I tried to get their help to get us out of _porn_ contracts they’d act like they didn’t even know me. I shouldn’t have said anything in front of Mark, it was a stupid thing to do.” He reached out for another piece of bacon but Chester playfully slapped his hand back.

“Don’t take anymore,” Chester ordered before his shoulders slumped a little. “Too bad about your parents not wanting to help. I mean. . .” he stopped for a minute, rolling options around in his mind. “I can’t quit until I pay off mom’s debt, but damn, I’d really like to think there was a way out if we needed it.” He glanced Mike’s way before he looked back at the bacon. He thought about his green onions in the fridge, and how he needed to chop them up to add a bit of color and garnish to their meal, until he heard his stomach rumble. Green onions would have to wait for another meal. It was time to eat. He took their bowls of mac and cheese and quickly sprinkled all the bacon pieces over them. “I’m so ready to go upstairs and get in bed,” he admitted as he handed Mike one of the bowls. 

“Me too.” Mike took the bowl in one hand and poured the rest of his coke into his glass. “Want me to top yours off before we go upstairs?” 

Chester nodded. “I’m sorry about your parents in general, Mike. How you guys don’t get along. If you ever want to, we could always go see them sometime,” he suggested gingerly as he sat the noodle pot in the sink and ran water in it. 

As he finished filling Chester’s glass with the rest of his Vanilla Coke, Mike nodded. “Maybe. Maybe if they see I’m making it on my own, if they see I’m happy and in a committed relationship, maybe they’ll find something to be proud of… even if I’m not the way they expected. Maybe I just need that degree, too. That would probably help.” He set the can down and picked up his glass, both hands full of deliciousness. “School is important to them. And even if it’s not ideal, that’s one thing YRS is going to provide for me, the ability to pursue that. So it’s not all bad. And we’re together,” he reminded Chester. “No matter what, we’ve got each other.” 

Chester smiled as he agreed. “And, you don’t need a degree to go see them. Just be you, _and_ you’ve got me now. I can turn on the charm,” he promised, wiggling his eyebrows as he took his drink and his bowl and led the way toward the stairs. “And YRS isn’t the hell my whining makes it out to be. Most weekends go on without incident,” he said as he glanced over his shoulder to see that Mike was following him. “You do your work and you leave, _and_ you get paid.” 

Mike couldn’t look away from the sway of Chester’s hips as he carefully took the stairs. _Hopefully it will be that easy. Do the work, leave, get paid. I’ve got to learn how to just do the work. I don’t want to think about any of this for the rest of the night. I just want to be with him, in our bed, in our space, alone._ “This is going to be the best Sunday night ever,” he declared, inhaling the scent of bacon topped mac and cheese. “Thanks for making dinner, Ches.”

“No problem,” he answered as he stepped into the bedroom. Just the sight of their bed, and the flannel sheets and blankets they both loved let something peaceful float over Chester’s mind. They were going to eat and watch a movie and snuggle and fall asleep. It would be a great evening. “I’m so ready for our bed,” he said as he set his bowl and drink on the nightstand so he could arrange his pillows against the headboard to sit up and eat in bed. “We need to go see my mom one day this week,” he mentioned. 

“I’d like that,” Mike said, setting down the items in his hands and looking over at Chester. “I promised you naked sleeping in exchange for mac and cheese.” A grin stretched over his face as he caught Chester’s eyes. “Am I getting naked now or after we eat?”

Chester let out a laugh as he sat down on the bed, his back against the pillows as he stretched his legs out in front of him. He rubbed a hand over one bare shoulder, and then across his stomach. He never did put a shirt on after their shower. “You do what you want, Sexy Boy. But, for me, the general rule is that if you’re eating something hot in bed, you don’t want to be totally naked. I’ve dropped things on myself before,” he added with a grimace. “Not fun.” 

“I’ll at least catch up,” Mike said, pulling off his t-shirt before settling in the bed next to his boyfriend. He reached to pick up his bowl but stopped and turned back to Chester, swiping a quick kiss across his cheek. “I love you. And we can go see your mom any day this week. I can’t think of any plans we have.” He grabbed his bowl and dug the spoon in, getting a huge bite of gooey mac and cheese before he sat back against the pillows. 

Chester already had a mouthful of noodles and bacon as he nodded. He looked over at his nightstand, staring at the remote, but somehow the rest of him didn’t want to move. Not even to turn the television on. At least not yet. He swallowed down his bite. “If we go see her tomorrow, then we’ll have the rest of the week free. We can go down to the beach or, I don’t know. . .what about going out of town for a night or two?” he asked, the idea rolling off his tongue before he’d really thought about it. 

“Like, a mini-vacation?” Mike asked, trying to think of where they could go. “That sounds fun. And something we haven’t done yet.” He smiled and nudged Chester’s leg with his knee. “Let’s go somewhere we can be outside for some of the time, you know, hiking and scenery and stuff. Nature. Something different from the beach.” 

Chester nodded. “Sure. Anywhere you want to go, Sexy Boy.” He smiled, watching Mike’s mind work. Wherever his boyfriend was going to pick, Chester knew they’d have fun. More than fun. It would be a break from work and from the reality they were currently pushing through. _We won’t talk about any of it while we’re away. It will be a rule. No talking about Mark or YRS. No talking about his parents or what he thinks he needs to be to impress them and make them happy. No talking about bills or the next two years. It will just be us. Together. We can do whatever we want, and not have to worry about anything._

****  
TBC


	29. Palm Springs

Chester stood in front of his closet, scanning over his racks of clothes. He and Mike had decided they’d only be gone one night, but it was still a big decision. In just half an hour, they’d be headed out the door and on their way to Palm Springs for a day of hiking, an evening of good food and then relaxing in the pool and hot tub of the nice hotel they’d already made a reservation for. _Now I just need to pick out something for tomorrow. Something that says I’m relaxed and just had an awesome time with my boyfriend._

He fingered over a few shirts, comparing them with his current dark purple v-neck, before he decided to go with classic white. _White with black jeans. You can’t get more relaxed than that. No, black shorts. Yes. Shorts._ He grabbed his outfit of choice, spun around and headed for the bed where his suitcase was sitting open. He carefully folded his clothes, fitting them in beside his extra pair of shoes, his toiletries from the bathroom, and the bottle of rum he’d taken from the kitchen earlier. He smiled at the bottle as he scooted it over to make room for underwear, pajama bottoms, and socks to match what he’d picked out. 

After everything was neatly organized, he zipped up his suitcase. He patted down his shirt front and over the pockets of his gray shorts. “Keys are still downstairs. And my wallet,” he muttered to himself before he turned toward the half-wall of the bedroom. “Mike!” he yelled as he pulled his suitcase off the bed and wheeled it toward the stairs. “I’m ready! You got everything you need?” 

Mike stepped out of the bathroom to holler up the stairs, “yeah, I’m all set!” before he said softly to himself, “I have been for a half hour.” He smiled and rolled his eyes. Choosing and packing clothing was easy for him. A standard t-shirt and shorts, a pair of jeans, and the blue button down Chester had bought for him months ago - just in case - were tucked inside his overnight bag with his necessities before his boyfriend had even chosen shoes for the afternoon. “You sure you’ve got everything? We are just going to be gone one night, you know.” He flashed a smile at Chester as he came off the last step and set his suitcase down. 

“Are you doubting my packing skills?” Chester asked, his smile bright before he motioned to his suitcase beside him. “I’m ready, and in record time. I think.” 

“No, just wanted to make sure you had everything you needed. I don’t want anything to disappoint you while we’re away.” Mike glanced down at his bag before he looked at Chester’s suitcase. “Looking at the size of your suitcase compared to my bag makes me feel like _I_ may have forgotten something.” 

“Well, you better check to make sure,” Chester insisted as he pointed to Mike’s bag. “Better to run back upstairs if you need to, then to get to the hotel tonight and realize you don’t have something. You got your cellphone charger?” 

Mike made a move to unzip his bag and follow directions before he remembered. Snug inside his bag was Chester’s black leather collar, hopefully out of sight between his shirts. He hesitated long enough to decide double checking his bag wasn’t worth the risk of ruining his surprise, and he nodded, bending to pick up the bag without looking inside. “Yeah, I got it. I was just teasing you, I checked twice already in the amount of time you were upstairs.” 

He tugged the bag over his shoulder and made his way to where Chester was still standing at the foot of the stairs. “I’m so ready to go. This is gonna be a great little trip. Fresh air, outdoors, nature and all that. I really love hiking, I’m glad you thought this was a good idea.” Mike reached to swipe a quick kiss across Chester’s cheek and then looked around the downstairs. “I think we’re good to go. I’ve turned off everything down here.” 

“Then let’s hit the road, Sexy Boy,” Chester suggested as he headed toward the door. “And I haven’t been hiking in forever, so I’m excited!” he announced with a fist pump before he stopped by the bar. He grabbed his sunglasses, sliding them onto his face, and then his keys and his wallet last as he shoved it into the back pocket of his shorts. “Next time, though, I want more notice so I can buy a kick ass pair of hiking boots.” He lifted his foot, briefly drawing Mike’s attention to his boot shoe, which would have to do for their mini-vacation. 

“Nah, a little bit of spontaneity is good,” Mike said, shaking his head with a grin. “Besides, we’re supposed to be trying to keep this trip from being expensive. You’ll be running up the bill buying new boots. What you have on your feet will work just fine.” The scandalized look on Chester’s face caused him to laugh out loud. “What? You know I’m right. But one day, someday, I’ll buy you all the shoes you want. And we’ll have a closet just for shoes. Racks and racks of shoes, every pair you want.” He reached out and took Chester’s hand, squeezing it tightly. “I’ll give you everything you want, Ches.”

“You know,” Chester said, squeezing Mike’s hand back, “when you say things like that. . .things about closets and shoes. . .it makes me think that maybe true love is real.” He grinned wide before he pulled on Mike’s arm, and brought him in close enough to peck his cheek with a soft kiss. “I know I don’t need the boots,” he whispered, “and that our money needs to go elsewhere. I just like to dream. And shop. And dream about shopping.” He pulled back enough to kiss Mike’s face again before he announced they needed to get going. 

“Let’s go then. If we aren’t careful, we won’t be going anywhere except back upstairs.” Mike winked at Chester before he grabbed the handle of the suitcase and started toward the door. “Don’t argue with me,” he called over his shoulder as Chester started to protest. “I’m taking your bag for you whether you like it or not.” The suitcase was heavier than he expected it to be, but that was so typical of his boyfriend to overpack. _Damn. What’s in here? It’s like he packed for a whole week!_

“Fine,” Chester said as he followed after his lover. “I don’t know how you got to be so stubborn, Mike Shinoda. But I love you anyway.” He flipped off the last lightswitch that was on in the kitchen before they headed out the front door. Chester glanced around his loft, his eyes bouncing from one space to another before he shut the door, and locked it. 

****

Hiking in the early afternoon sun had been a little piece of fun, and a bigger piece of exhausting. Mike had led the way, guiding them along a skinny trail that was affectionately known as The Devil’s Backbone. They had almost made it to the halfway point, before it was decided that they had both had enough of nature. 

After drinking gallons of water and doing a quick wash down and clean up in the recreation wash space just out front of the beginning of the hiking trails, it was decided that dinner was needed, and then they’d be off to check into their posh hotel room for the night. 

Chester sat across from Mike at the Mexican restaurant they’d chosen, his black painted nails tapping lightly on the colorful tiles that covered the tabletop. “It smells so good in here,” he commented as he hopefully looked over Mike’s shoulder and toward the set of double swinging doors where waitresses and waiters were entering and exiting like they were in a race. Already Chester had seen plates of enchiladas, tacos, and smothered burritos pass by their table. His stomach growled as he wrapped an arm around it. “They neeeeed to hurry,” he whined. 

“No joke. I might die before the food gets here,” Mike grumbled, scooping up more salsa on his tortilla chip. “All these chips are doing is making me hungrier. You must have ordered something that’s taking a long time.” He pointed his chip accusingly at Chester before scarfing it down.

Chester rolled his eyes as he took one of the chips, snapping it in half. “We ordered the same thing, Sexy Boy. So if mine’s taking a long time, so is yours.” He crunched down one half of the chip before he licked the salt from his lips and went for the tall glass of Coke he’d been given. “I don’t know how you’re eating that salsa, it’s way too spicy.” 

“That’s what makes it so good. The spicier the better,” Mike said. “The problem is you’re drinking a Coke. That doesn’t go with salsa. If you’re gonna eat salsa, you’ve gotta drink water. And I forgot we both ordered cheese enchiladas. I fuckin’ love cheese enchiladas. I think if you didn’t love cheese enchiladas it might have been a deal breaker.” He popped another salsa laden chip in his mouth before another thought hit him. “Chester. We should have gotten guacamole.”

“I drank my fill of water up on that mountain. I’m done for the day. I’m not a fish,” Chester shot back before he munched down the other half of his chip. “And I hope their cheese enchiladas are good here. Hopefully they remember my extra side of sour cream,” he mumbled just as a waitress appeared at their table with a large round serving tray. 

“I have two orders of cheese enchiladas with rice and beans?” she said, her Mexican accent strong as her dark eyes flipped between the two men in front of her. 

Chester nodded. “That’s right.” 

“Okay, these plates are hot,” she told them as she picked each one up with a red oven mitt. When she was done, she took a step back, the round tray at her side. “Is there anything else?” 

“My sour cream?” Chester asked, pointing to his plate, which had zero of his favorite Mexican condiment on it. 

The waitress nodded as she assured him she’d be right back with it. 

Mike looked down at his plate and back at Chester. “At least they got my extra onions. They usually forget those, too.” He picked up his fork, his mouth watering at the sight of the melted yellow cheese peeking out of the rolled up tortillas, the red sauce with the extra chopped onions on top, and the orange Mexican rice next to the refried beans. The steam was rising off the plate and he couldn’t wait to dig in, but Chester was stubbornly looking down at his plate, then back in the direction the waitress had disappeared moments ago. “You can’t even take the first bite without sour cream?” 

Chester’s eyes narrowed into a scowl. “No,” he stated before he turned in his seat again, praying she’d hurry up. “It’s like she vanished!”

With all the patience he could muster, Mike waited, eyeing the doorway to the kitchen with frustration until he saw the waitress headed their way with sour cream in a small dish. _Thank goodness. I really thought I’d pass out soon if he didn’t get his damn sour cream._ “Here she comes, Ches.” He pointed his fork in the general direction of the waitress.

Chester held himself back from jumping in his seat. She sat the sour cream down on their table, and after Chester had thanked her multiple times over, they were alone again. “Okay, _now_ I’m ready,” he told Mike, even though he was too late. His boyfriend already had a mouth full of cheese. “I would ask how it is, but it’s obviously fantastic,” Chester half giggled as he took his sour cream and began to meticulously spread it out over every single item on his plate. “Hmmm...I might need another one.” 

Mike’s eyes were closed in cheese enchilada bliss. “Hmm?” he managed before he swallowed. “More enchiladas?” He cracked an eye open and looked at Chester’s plate, covered in white sour cream, and he laughed. “Oh! No, you don’t need any more sour cream. I swear, babe, you cover all the good food in loads of condiments and sauces. How can you even taste the gloriousness of these enchiladas with sour cream all over them?” 

Chester sliced a piece of enchilada with the side of his fork. “Please, it’s the sour cream that makes it so good.” He popped the bite into his mouth, making sure his tongue nabbed all the stray bits of sour cream from his lips and piercing before he went for another. “So,” Chester said with a swallow, “now that we’ve got hiking out of our systems,” he stated with a soft groan, “are we headed to the hotel after this? I’d love to hit the hot tub.” He waited a second, getting an odd look from his boyfriend. “I know we have one at YRS, but this would be. . .different.” 

“The hot tub?” Mike asked, his gaze cutting away to the windows and the bright bit of cloudless sky he could see from his seat. “Okay, if that’s what you want, I’m there. But no getting crazy in the hot tub. You’ve gotta save that for the room.” He really wasn’t sure about the hot tub. Part of the reason for their mid-week getaway was to leave all the thoughts of YRS behind and focus on each other. He wasn’t sure if he’d be able to keep thoughts of the big house and what went on there out of his head while they were in the hot tub, but he wasn’t going to tell Chester no.

“Don’t worry,” Chester assured him as he scooped a massive blob of rice, beans, and sour cream onto his fork, “I can behave myself. The jets will feel awesome after that murder hike we just went through.” He cracked a smile before he shoved his forkful of food into his mouth, the mix of textures and hot and cool hitting all the right places. 

Without looking in Chester’s direction, Mike tapped his foot against his boyfriend’s under the table. “Well, I don’t want you to behave _all_ night,” he mumbled, his voice low enough not to be overheard by the tables close to them. “That’s no fun.” He licked a bit of cheese off his bottom lip before he reached for his water glass. 

Chester nudged Mike’s foot back, before he slid it up the front part of his boyfriend’s leg. “And, uh, what did you have in mind for later?” he asked, his tone coming out with his special brand of sexy slyness. “Got something specific you want to do?” 

“Maybe.” Mike flicked a quick glance in Chester’s direction before he directed the next carefully crafted bite of just the right amount of rice, beans, and enchilada to his mouth. He let the ambiguity hang in the air between them, unwilling to let on about his plans for the evening, the collar he’d smuggled on the trip. He was going to make Chester wait.

“Maybe what?” Chester asked, his boot shoe heading a little further up Mike’s leg before he pulled it back. “Don’t make me guess.” 

With a smirk, Mike said, “it’s fun if you guess. But it’s more fun if I get to surprise you instead.” His food was already halfway gone, and he paused for a moment, looking at Chester’s plate. “Is the sour cream really that good?” he asked, trying to change the subject before Chester could start guessing. “I’ve never tried it.” He reached his fork toward Chester’s plate with a raised eyebrow, silently asking permission to take a bite of the white stuff. 

Chester’s mouth dropped open. “You’ve _never_ had sour cream? How is that _even_ possible? Yes, yes, take some,” he insisted as he shoved his plate a little closer to Mike’s fork. “My God, Mike, you’ve been deprived!” 

Mike couldn’t hold back his laughter. “Of course I’ve had sour cream before! Just not on enchiladas!” He scooped a bit off Chester’s plate and then took a bite of enchilada from his own, sticking the concoction in his mouth before Chester could say anything else. It was good, but it wasn’t the most amazing thing he’d ever had in his mouth. The way Chester was breathlessly watching him taste the bite, he knew it would annoy him if he said as much. “I don’t know, Ches. It’s good, but… it’s not, like, _orgasmic_ or anything.” 

Chester shook his head. “You’re wrong,” he stated simply. “But that’s okay. You’re wrong about a lot of things,” he teased as he stuck his tongue out for just a second. “Now, let’s hurry up and finish. I want to get to the hotel so we can check out the hot tub, and then you can let me in on this idea of yours for the bedroom.” He sat forward, ready to inhale what was left of his food as he looked up, waiting to make sure Mike was going to agree. No sense in swallowing everything in one bite, if Mike was going to be another twenty minutes. 

“I’ll give you a hint,” Mike said quietly, watching Chester as he leaned in closer, his eyes betraying his eagerness to hear Mike’s idea. He paused just a moment before he grinned and said, “unlike this sour cream, it is _very_ orgasmic.” He reached over and slid a finger down Chester’s neck quickly, not lingering and not drawing any attention to them. “Now, I’m all for finishing, if it gets us up in the room quicker.” Mike sat back and stuck his fork in his rice, pleased with himself for teasing his boyfriend a little. 

Chester licked his lips before he sat back. It was definitely time to eat and get to the hotel. “That wasn’t much of a hint, Sexy Boy, but I’m really ready to find out what you’re hiding over there.” He shifted in his seat a little, his sleeping cock having twitched a little when Mike had ran his finger down his neck. If that was any kind of sign to how the rest of their night was going to be, Chester couldn’t wait. 

****

Chester tapped his fingers across the check-in counter at the hotel. Already he and Mike had been waiting for over fifteen minutes while the staff rushed around to try and figure out what had happened to their reservation. The manager had been called, the front desk clerk who had made the reservation had been questioned, and so far four different people had stared at the computer behind the counter, like somehow they were going to see something the first three people had missed. 

“I’m sorry, Sir,” the current hotel employee said, her eyes traveling up his face and landing on his red-tipped mohawk for a moment before she flipped her long blonde hair over her shoulder and concentrated on the computer screen, “we’re trying to find out what happened.” 

“It’s fine,” Chester answered, as he turned to hide his eye roll. He was tired of excuses. He just wanted the key to a room. _Any_ room would do at this point. He let out a sigh, his eyes drifting over the lobby and the row of empty leather padded chairs where his and Mike’s luggage was sitting. His boyfriend had excused himself just a minute ago to go to the restroom and maybe grab a Coke from the hotel lounge, the spicy food from their dinner coming back to haunt him. _If he’d more sour cream, he wouldn’t have that issue._ Chester’s playful smirk turned into a yawn as he listened to the hotel employees behind the counter dive into a fresh debate over which room Mr. Bennington was going to be given. 

The idea of telling them to forget it, that he and Mike would just leave and find a different hotel had crossed his mind more than once, but as he stood at the counter and watched the front doors open and close, as guests came and went, as the warm air from outside tried to barge into the resplendent feel of the lobby, Chester didn’t have it in him. This was the hotel he’d paid for, and this is the hotel where they were going to stay. He wanted to try their five star hot tubs and be in a room with a view of the city so he and Mike could look at the stars, and the city skyline under it. Their room was supposed to have a balcony, and he was hoping that wouldn’t get lost in all this reservation fiasco. 

All of the water from dinner was causing Mike to need to pee every fifteen minutes. _I’m like Chester right now. Always needing to pee._ He’d gone off in search of the restroom and left both the bags and Chester behind to sort out the room mess. It was an incredible hotel, one that he felt shouldn’t be messing up reservations. _Someone will probably get into a lot of trouble for that later._

He passed by the concierge desk on his way to the lobby bathroom, ignoring the younger man in a suit behind the desk and only briefly glancing at the artwork on the walls. There was light piano music drifting from the lounge and bar area, and he made a quick note to see if it was live music when he went in search of a beverage after the bathroom. Right now the focus was only on business.

After he’d washed his hands, feeling ten times lighter, he stepped out of the cleanest public bathroom he’d ever seen and walked back toward the lounge, this time at a more relaxed pace. _Look at all these paintings, and that sculpture over there… I’ve never stayed in a hotel this nice before. I bet that piano is live, a place like this probably has someone playing in the evening. That’s probably a cushy gig. But boring. And people talk over you while you play. If I’m playing, I want people to listen._

Mike pulled his phone from his back pocket and quickly shot a text to Chester, asking the status of the room, before he walked through the lounge area and up to the bar. He leaned against the counter and looked around, spotting a grand piano in the corner. _I knew it. That’s pretty cool._ From where he stood the lid of the piano blocked the view of the player, but he didn’t give it a second thought. _Probably some older retired person,_ he dismissed, smiling at the bartender as he came and stood in front of him.

Even though he’d come to the bar for a coke on Chester’s suggestion, he ordered a Sprite anyway, and without realizing it, he started to follow the song along with his fingers on the bar top as he waited. It was familiar, something he’d heard and worked on before, but he wasn’t paying enough attention to even know that he recognized the tune. His fingers moved on their own accord. 

“Want to charge this to your room, or you wanna pay for it now?” the bartender asked, setting the glass with a straw down in front of Mike on a small white square napkin. 

“Um, well…” Mike turned his head back toward the lobby, even though he couldn’t see Chester from where he was standing. “I don’t know the room number. I’ll just pay for it,” he said, reaching for his wallet just as his phone vibrated with a text.

**7:34 pm** _The room isn’t ready. They’re still trying to sort it out. Sounds like it’s going to be another few minutes. I’ll just meet you at the bar when they finally figure it out._

Mike rolled his eyes and pocketed his phone, opening his wallet and taking out cash to leave for the bartender. He grabbed the Sprite and turned away, looking for a place to sit and wait. _I should have gotten him a Coke. Well, he didn’t ask for one. But I should have anyway. Wait. Maybe the Coke he told me to get was really for him._ He scrunched his eyes in thought before he sat down in a corner where two overstuffed caramel colored leather chairs sat with a small brown table in between. It seemed like a good spot to wait. He could see everyone coming and going from the lounge, but he was quietly in the corner alone. 

As he sat down, he felt the fatigue in his legs from the hiking earlier, and he fussed at himself in his head for over-exerting himself. There were plans for the evening that didn’t include him having sore muscles. _Not those muscles, anyway._ Mike smirked at himself as he set his drink on the small table and ran a hand through his blue tipped hair before he leaned his head back and crossed his ankle over his knee. The ceiling was crisscrossed in small recessed light fixtures that glowed a warm amber light over the room, giving the lounge what he supposed was pretentiously referred to as ‘atmosphere.’ Chester had done a great job picking the place out, and he was anxious to see what their room looked like. His boyfriend had mentioned a balcony, and that sounded like way more fun than the hot tub, but none of it mattered at the moment. They didn’t have a room yet.

Mike was lost in naughty thoughts of Chester and the balcony when he heard someone call his name. A voice that was familiar, but just far enough out of grasp that he couldn’t immediately place it. He lifted his head and turned in the direction of the voice, his brown eyes locking instantly with clear baby blues that he hadn’t seen in a long time. More than a year. 

“Mike?” the voice attached to those eyes said again, a tentative smile crossing his face. 

“Oh, whoa. Chris? Wow, what, um, hey! Um… what are you doing here?” Mike cringed at the breathless sound of his own voice as he hastily uncrossed his legs and stood up, much less gracefully than he’d intended. Before he could say or do anything else, Chris had pulled him into a hug.

“Working! I can’t believe you’re in Palm Springs, I haven’t seen you since-” Chris dropped his arms from Mike’s shoulders and took a step back. “Well. You know.” He cleared his throat and glanced toward the entrance to the lounge and then back at Mike. “How have you been?”

While Chris was carefully choosing his words, Mike was staring at him like he had just magically materialized from a memory. He never thought he’d see this guy again, not after the way things had ended between them. There was no reason to ever speak to Chris Armstrong again, but here they were, in the lounge of an expensive hotel, and Chris had come to chat him up. He looked exactly the way Mike remembered - short, neatly trimmed dark hair, those piercing blue eyes, the fuller set of lips that Mike hadn’t given another thought to after he’d met Chester. The only thing that was different was the absence of the five o’clock shadow Chris had loved to sport on his All-American athlete face. Once he’d discovered he could grow facial hair, it had been on. Mike remembered the first time Chris had come to the studio unshaven, and they’d crossed paths after Mike’s piano lesson. The first time he’d felt that twinge of desire for the guy that ended up being one of many poor choices.

He realized he hadn’t spoken yet and forced a smile. “Me? Good, I’m good. You, you look good, too. I mean, relaxed. You said you work here? That’s cool.” _God, Mike, shut up. You’re rambling like an idiot. Just stop._ He took a deep breath and looked around the lounge. _Where is Chester? I need him to come rescue me._

Chris’ smile jumped off his face, revealing his straight white teeth and the one dimple Mike remembered now that they were face to face again. “You haven’t changed much,” he teased. “Still nervous around me, I see.” He looked around, trying to figure out what Mike was looking for. An escape route? That would be unfortunate. They hadn’t seen each other since the night before Mike’s eighteenth birthday, when he’d spent a lot of money on a nice dinner and night out, only to be rejected again when he pushed for more intimacy later that evening. Mike had finally broken up with him, ending their several month long relationship, but despite that, Chris had never really gotten Mike out of his mind. And now that he was there in the hotel he worked at, hours away from their hometown, it felt like maybe it was an opportunity to make up for that night. Maybe Mike had grown up a little bit. Maybe he wasn’t so uptight about the idea of sex anymore. 

Mike felt his cheeks flush a little. _Nervous? Not nervous. Surprised, but not nervous. I don’t think. Not the way he thinks I am._ He shook his head, averting his eyes again. “Still full of yourself, I see,” he said back, trying to keep his voice light but failing.

“Ouch,” Chris said, covering his heart with his hand and feigning unbearable pain. “You know how to get me where it hurts, Shinoda.” 

“Just calling it like I see it,” Mike shot back, the anxiety he was feeling coming through loud and clear in his tone. “Anyway, it was nice to run into you, glad to see you’re doing well.” He let another forced smile grace his lips as he turned to pick up his drink. _I’ll just go find Chester. I don’t want to stay here and talk to him. There’s nothing to say._

“Mike, wait,” Chris said, his hand reaching for Mike’s arm and connecting softly. “Don’t go yet,” he plead quietly, all the bravado dropped for the moment. “Sorry, I don’t mean to be an ass, you know how it is. I was playing and I saw you walk in, and I swear I did a double take. I didn’t think it was really you. But it is, and I would really like to catch up a bit. I’m sorry,” he said again, then gestured toward the chairs. “Let’s sit down, just for a minute. I only have about a fifteen minute break. I’d love to know how you are… you _look_ amazing.”

Mike cocked his head in thought, ignoring the compliment. He could think of a lot of reasons to walk out of the lounge and never look back at Chris, but he couldn’t deny that part of him was curious, too. A little slice of him wondered what he’d been doing, if he was happy, and if he was seeing anyone. _If we sit here I’ll have to introduce him to Chester, and I don’t know how that will go. He’s never met one of my exes. But what difference is it, really, from meeting Ryan or Amir or any of the guys at YRS? I don’t even know who he’s been with, and I have to work around those guys. Chris and I, we never had sex, we never went further than blow jobs. It’s not a big deal, right?_ Even though a little voice inside was telling him to walk away, Mike sighed and sat down, taking a sip of his Sprite before setting it back down on the small table. “Okay. We’ll catch up for a minute. But just so you know, my boyfriend will be strolling in here at any moment, and I’ll be going.”

Chris’ eyebrows shot up in mild surprise. “Oh! Oh, you’re here with your boyfriend? I thought, I figured you were here with your parents. This is a pretty ritzy place.” 

The implications were clear. This place was out of Mike’s budget, and given their history and Mike’s unwillingness to go all the way with Chris, it was surprising that he was entertaining a boyfriend overnight at a hotel. “Yeah. We came for a little mini-vacation, we’re just staying the night. His name is Chester.” Just saying his lover’s name brought a real smile to Mike’s face, and he didn’t give a second thought to Chris’ comment about his parents. There was no need to go into that detail with someone who had become so insignificant in his life. 

“That sounds nice.” Chris sounded sincere, and Mike felt himself relax just a little in the other man’s presence. “I’ve been here about six months now, I’m the live music here Monday through Friday from the cocktail hour to ten. The pay is pretty good, and I’ve got another day job right now, but I’m hoping I’ll get to do the weekend thing when Stefan leaves. It’s busier in here on the weekend and he actually makes extra money on tips, so that would be cool. What are you doing these days? Did you decide to go to school?” 

Mike shifted in his chair and started restlessly fingering through scales on the armrests, his fingers mindlessly working through the exercises he knew by memory. “I’ve been teaching lessons and saving up, practicing… hoping to audition next spring for admission in the fall.” He shrugged. “My parents didn’t support a performance degree so I’m figuring out how to do it on my own.”

“You can perform without a performance degree,” Chris said earnestly, leaning in his chair toward Mike and bumping their knees together. “Maybe you can come play here when the Monday through Friday gig opens up. Just sayin’.” He winked and then reached a hand toward Mike’s knee. “I know how much you love playing. It could be a good start you know.” He spread his fingers out like a starburst over Mike’s kneecap and looked at him through dark lashes.

For a moment, Mike found himself caught in Chris’ eyes, unable to look away. There had been a time when he’d been completely infatuated with this guy, and it was easy to see why. He was a smooth talker and always had been. He’d been the one to pursue Mike, and if there had been anything other than a physical connection between them, maybe it would have worked out. But Chris knew he was good looking, and he knew how to get people to do what he wanted, and when Mike was tentative and unwilling to go a step further, it became obvious that there wasn’t any emotional intimacy between them. Mike had been raised on the idea of emotional intimacy and love, and there was no crossing that physical boundary without those two things. It was the reason he’d been so willing to cross that line with Chester.

_Ches. Fuck, he can’t walk in here and see this._ Mike looked down at Chris’ hand, which was rubbing a lazy circle on his knee while his ex smiled at him, and he felt a bit of panic starting to build in his chest. “Chris,” he started softly. “What are you doing? I told you I was here with my boyfriend. Who will be here any minute now. You need to stop.”

“Yeah?” Chris looked around the mostly empty lounge, and flicked his tongue over his bottom lip, gratified to see Mike watching him. “I don’t know, it doesn’t seem like you really want me to. I know I don’t really want to.”

Instinct kicked in, and Mike reached to cover Chris’ hand with his, stopping the gentle stroking for a moment as he said, “no, really. I know you know what I mean when I say, you need to stop.”

Back at the front desk, Chester was finally being handed the double key cards to his and Mike’s hotel room. “Finally,” he mumbled under his breath. 

“Again, we’re so sorry for this mix up. We’d be happy to send you up room service in the morning, or even tonight. It’s on us,” the desk clerk told him, her hand on chest. 

“Okay, that would be good,” Chester said with a sigh. He really didn’t care. He wasn’t hungry, and after stuffing his face with Mexican less than an hour ago, he wasn’t going to be hungry anytime soon. He could really use a drink though. He swung around, his eyes landing on his and Mike’s bags. “Can you have someone take our bags up to our room? I have to go find my boyfriend.” He half-heartedly pointed toward the bar and lounge area. “He’s obviously given up and gone to sit down somewhere.” 

“Of course, Mr. Bennington,” she told him, offering him a smile before he turned and walked away. She watched him go, studying his wild hair and the very informal attire he was wearing before she called for one of the bellboys to take the luggage up to the room.

Chester headed for the bar first, figuring that’s where Mike would be. He had to figure he’d be perched on a stool, sipping a Coke and plotting out their nightly plans. Chester was already smiling when he finally got to the bar, but it only took a quick scan of the area to realize Mike wasn’t there. “Bartender!” he called, waving a hand, and the man behind the counter scooted over to stand in front of him. “Have you seen a guy in here? A really cute guy with a kind of baby face and stunning brown eyes?” 

The bartender gave Chester a sideways glance before he tossed his white wipe rag over his shoulder and leaned forward, his hands on the bar. “You’re going to have to be more specific.” 

“Oh,” Chester said, feeling a bit stumped. He thought he’d described Mike pretty spot on. “He’s about this tall,” he said, holding a hand out to his side. “Oh! And he’s got blue hair,” he added with a snap of his fingers. 

The bartender chuckled for a minute. “He was in here,” he assured Chester. “I think he went over to the lounge area where the live music is.” 

Chester cocked his head, trying to listen, but he didn’t hear anything other than light chatter going on at the scattered tables. _Maybe it will start again or something._ “Okay, thank you,” he told the bartender, ready to walk away to go collect his lover, but he stopped. “Um, you know what, give me a rum and Coke,” he suggested, his eyes scanning the lighted back wall, which was lined with bottles of all sizes and designs. 

The bartender stood himself up straight as he looked Chester up and down. “I’ll need to see your I.D.” 

“Sure.” Chester didn’t hesitate to pull his wallet from his back pocket and flash his fake I.D. in front of the man. _I’m almost twenty-one anyway. Another couple of months and I’m golden. Then I can get rid of this thing._

The bartender only briefly looked at it before he handed it back, and a minute later he handed Chester his rum and Coke, too. 

“Cheers,” Chester said as he raised his glass and took a quick drink, savoring the refreshing taste of the alcohol before he headed for the lounge. He’s grab Mike, and they could head upstairs, check out their room, and then head for the hot tub and the pool. 

He stepped into the lounge area, his eyes hitting the grand piano first, and he smiled. _No wonder Mike wandered in here._ He took a few steps to the left, trying to see if anyone was sitting at it, right before he spotted Mike out of the corner of his eye. 

He took a step forward, but stopped. Some guy was sitting with his boyfriend at the small round table. Sitting very close to him. Chester’s eyes narrowed as he looked the guy up and down - clean shaven, a head full of hair gel, and a tacky suit. _Pffft. Whatever._ Without another thought, Chester headed for the table. The moment he was in earshot, he called out, “There you are, Sexy Boy! Come on, they got our room ready.” He stepped right up to Mike’s side, looking down at the stranger, who seemed to have a hand on Mike’s leg. 

Mike jerked his hand back in surprise, the action looking guilty as he looked up at Chester. “Ches! Oh, good, I’m glad you got it sorted out!” He stood up quickly and went to peck his boyfriend on the cheek. “I, I, well, this is a friend of mine, from home. He, I, um, well, he works here, and we were just catching up for a minute.” Mike knew he was fumbling over every word he was saying and making the whole introduction more awful than it would have been if Chester just hadn’t walked in with Chris’ hand on his knee. 

Chris had on a full grin again, his dimple deep, as he stood up and confidently extended his hand to Chester. “Hi, I’m Chris.” 

Chester shook his hand without issue, looking him right in the eyes. “I’m Chester. So, you and Mike catching up? Sounds fun. Are you a childhood friend?”

Mike opened his mouth to respond but Chris was faster. “Something like that,” he said, a hint of suggestion in his voice. “We were piano students at the same studio.”

“Oh, okay, cool.” Chester offered the guy a smile. “I guess that explains the outfit,” he said, pointing at Chris’ very formal attire. “See, Mike, do you really want to have to wear something like this all your life?” he asked, swinging his attention to his boyfriend for a second before he looked back at Chris and said, “No offense, just making a point,” before he went on. “It’s like a trap of ties and pants that sound funny when you walk.” 

“I don’t think-” Mike started, but Chris interrupted smoothly.

“And what explains _your_ look?” he asked with overdone politeness, his hand waving up and down in front of Chester. “What is it that you do… Charlie? Was it?” Chris kept the smile on his face as he purposely forgot Chester’s name and insulted his mohawk, lip ring, and tattoos in one breath.

For half a second, Chester’s next words hitched in his throat. _Charlie Bang. No. Surely this guy has no idea who I am._ He glanced over at Mike, but it was clear his boyfriend wasn’t going to be any help as he stood pale-faced and practically sweating to death. 

Chester cleared his throat, and cocked an eyebrow. This wasn’t the first jerk he’d been privileged to share conversation with. “I work in movies,” Chester told him simply. “It pays well, and I can wear whatever the hell I want. Now, we have a room to get to and a bed to break in.” He wiggled his eyebrows before he grabbed Mike’s hand. “It was nice to meet you,” he offered to Chris before he tugged on Mike to follow him. “Come on, Sexy Boy, I’m ready to get out of here.” 

Mike didn’t even bother to say bye as Chester pulled him away. It was a relief to leave Chris behind, standing in the lounge open mouthed and staring after them. He’d left his Sprite behind but it didn’t matter. There was nothing that would make him go back for it now.

“Sorry, Ches, I knew he was an asshole, but…” Mike’s sentence trailed off as he realized that his boyfriend had handled Chris just fine. He didn’t even seem upset about the whole hand on the leg thing. “I didn’t think he’d be such a jerk to you, he doesn’t even know you.” 

Chester shrugged as they walked before he took a sip of his drink. “Believe me, I’ve run into bigger assholes than that. It’s part of the business,” he added before he glanced Mike’s way. “Can’t believe you’d be friends with someone like that.” 

Suddenly Mike wished he’d turned around and picked his Sprite up after all. His mouth felt dry as he swallowed and the seconds ticked by. Seconds he knew would become minutes that would be too long after Chester’s comment to confess the nature of his history with Chris if he waited. He bit down on his bottom lip and frowned, trying to come up with a gentle way to tell the truth, but ended up just blurting out, “oh, well, he’s kinda an ex.” 

Chester stopped, and Mike stopped right along with him, even though they were still a good twenty feet from the elevator. “An ex? Really?” Chester turned to look back the way they came, but Chris and the lounge was now a long ways off. “That guy?” He let go of Mike’s hand to point. “You were with that, that jerk-off?” 

“Yeah, I know. I was stupid. I told you I always dated jerks before, and now you’ve met one, so you’ve essentially met them all. Cookie cutter replicas of each other.” Mike reached for Chester’s hand again. “Don’t judge me. I didn’t know what I was doing.” 

“I’m not judging you, Mike,” Chester said softly. “I’m just surprised. I mean. . .” he pursed his lips for a moment, rolling his piercing back and forth with his tongue. “How do you, how do you go from guys like that to. . .” he dropped his head, looking over his more than casual outfit and his boot shoes that were now rather dirty from their hike, and for the first time since he’d met Mike Shinoda, Chester didn’t feel like he measured up to his boyfriend’s unknown past selection of partners. 

“Oh, babe, let me tell you, those guys were all wrong. All the same, none of them really wanting much more than sex that I wasn’t willing to give. When I met you, when I first talked to you, there was something else between us, I could feel it. Even if you did come on kinda strong at first.” Mike stopped and thought for a second before he smiled. “Okay, a lot strong. But there was something about you, I knew if I could get you past that initial thing you thought you wanted that we’d find something even better. And I was right. Trust me, I’ve never had a regret. If anything I’ve wondered what it was that made you want to wait for _me._ I know it must have made you crazy.” 

He squeezed Chester’s hand and reached with his other hand to stroke a finger softly down the side of his lover’s face. “If I could go back I’d do it all over again with you, though. Even if I made you crazy, I hope it’s been worth it for you. You’re the only person I’ve ever been in love with, Ches. Those jerks don’t mean a thing.” 

Chester felt the heaviness that had settled on his shoulders lift. “You _did_ drive me crazy,” he admitted as he nodded for Mike to go with him to the elevator. “I remember that you were like this puzzle I couldn’t figure out. You kept wanting to do all this weird stuff, and I couldn’t figure out why. Walks on the beach and feeding ducks and looking at clouds,” he recalled with a short giggle just as they stopped in front of the elevator. He let go of Mike’s hand to pull the little envelope that held their room cards out of his pocket to check which floor they were on, while they waited. “You were different,” he continued as he pressed the button to call the elevator. “Most guys just want to jump in bed, and I guess that’s what I was looking for too,” he admitted with a swallow. “I couldn’t understand why you didn’t want that, and by the time we had a few dates of doing all your oddball stuff, I, well, I really liked spending time with you.” 

“Oddball stuff,” Mike repeated with a chuckle. “You mean, actually dating?”

Chester turned, his eyes widening a little. He’d never really thought about it in those terms. He took another drink. “Um, yeah, dating. I guess that just really wasn’t part of my world at the time. I. . .I didn’t even recognize it when we were doing it.” 

“Well, thanks for letting me shake up your world a little bit,” Mike said softly right before the elevator doors opened. “There’s nobody else whose world I want to shake more than yours.” He stepped into the elevator, Chester right behind him. 

“Well thanks for shaking it up,” Chester half-laughed before he hit the button for the eighth floor. “Let’s stop talking about the past, it’s depressing,” he suggested as the doors closed and they both felt the elevator start upward. “I can’t wait to see our room. The view should be great.” He looked over at Mike, and playfully bumped his hip into him. “You know, I think this is our first time sharing a hotel room together. I vote we make it memorable.” 

****

Mike wrapped the thick white towel around his waist and reached for his t-shirt, anxious to get it over his head and get back upstairs to the room. He could admit the hot tub had been nice and relaxing - at first. Chester never missed an opportunity to tease him when he knew Mike either couldn’t or wouldn’t make good on his advances, and now he was impatient. They hadn’t really been intimate since before the weekend at YRS, even though there had been a lot of sex over the weekend. Having orders thrown at him and cameras watching was the very opposite of intimate.

“C’mon, Ches, let’s go,” he mumbled with an edge to his voice, mesmerized by the very slow drying routine his boyfriend was working his way through. “You’re doing that on purpose,” he whined, pointing an accusing finger at Chester, frustrated with the pace of the towel moving over his warmed skin. 

“I’m not doing anything on purpose,” Chester said, his lips lifting to a smile. “And look at this, all that steam has flattened my mohawk.” He patted his red-tipped hair, frowning as he felt how deflated it was. “Why are there no mirrors in here?” He rolled his eyes before he finished wiping his towel over his naked chest, his black swim trunks, and onto his legs. “Screw my shirt, I can’t get dry enough to put it back on. All this steam, it’s like we’re in a volcano.” 

“You don’t need a shirt,” Mike said breathlessly as he quickly flattened his own shirt over his stomach. “Or a mirror. I don’t give a damn what your hair looks like right now. You can’t expect me to care when you’re rubbing all over me under water. Upstairs. Now.” He looked pointedly at Chester and then took a step toward the door.

“So impatient,” Chester chuckled under his breath. “A little hot tub foreplay and you turn into an animal,” he teased as he followed after his lover. He put his hand on Mike’s back as he rubbed little circles while they headed out of the hot tub/pool area. 

A blast of cool air hit them the moment they opened the heavy door, and stepped out into the more formal area of the hotel. They passed a few other guests in swimwear with towels over their shoulders and flip-flops on their feet, but once they were down the hallway, they could see the bar and the lounge. Chester could hear the live piano music coming from the lounge and he tossed a glare that way before he pulled on the back of Mike’s shirt. “Wait, let’s go get a drink from the bar before we go upstairs. As in, we can take it upstairs with us,” he suggested as he twisted to point the opposite direction. 

Mike stopped abruptly and turned to Chester. “Really? You want me to go back in there? I’m not going back in there right now. And I can’t get a drink anyway. _And_ I just told you I’m ready to go upstairs, and it’s not to watch tv.” He was about to turn back toward the elevator, but he saw how quickly he’d squashed the anticipation in Chester’s eyes and he gave in immediately. “Fine,” he grumbled, “you go get a drink and I’ll wait here. I’m not going back in there.” He crossed his arms and looked at Chester with an expression that did not leave room for argument. 

“Okay, no, I don’t blame you,” Chester assured him, putting his hands up in surrender. “I’ll be quick. Want me to bring you back something?” 

It was a struggle to turn his mind from the thought of getting Chester upstairs and naked to drinks. “Sure, I guess. Whatever you’re having.”

Chester grinned as he said, “Perfect.” He pulled the towel from his shoulders and flipped at Mike. “Hang onto this. I’ll be right back, Sexy Boy.” He spun around and headed for the bar, making sure to sway his hips a little more than usual since he knew Mike was watching. 

He headed right for the bar, only having to sidestep a few people and dodge around one table where two girls gave him a double take worth of looks. He squeezed himself between two empty barstools before he flashed the bartender his full smile. “Remember me from before?” he asked. 

The man nodded. “Gotta tell ya’, that haircut is hard to forget.” 

“I know. It’s fabulous, isn’t it?” he asked, fanning his fingers over it with a silly laugh before he said, “Give me two rum and Cokes, please.” 

The bartender assured him they’d be right up. He turned and made quick work of the drinks, and after Chester told him his room number so he wouldn’t have to pay cash, he scooped both cups up and headed back to Mike, who he could see was standing with his arms crossed and his foot tapping. 

“Here,” Chester said, handing off one of the drinks before he took a long sip of his. “We can go now. See, didn’t take me that long.” 

Mike took a sip of the drink and made a quick face as they started toward the elevator again. “Damn, that’s strong.” He wasn’t much of a drinker, usually just the drinks Chester made at home, and those were typically fruity or sweet. This packed a different punch. _I probably won’t even finish this. I don’t know why I told him to get me one anyway. I’ve got different plans in mind for tonight. He never thinks so, but he looks so hot with his hair all messed up. I want to mess it up even more._

He smirked as he reached for the elevator call button, Chester’s towel still draped over his arm. _Look at him. He really doesn’t get it, I don’t think. Maybe I should make him put a shirt on. I don’t want anyone else to look at him._ “Hey, aren’t you cold without your shirt on? You want your towel back? You could put it over your shoulders,” he suggested, ready to cover up his boyfriend’s body.

Chester took a sip of his drink as he waved his hand. “Naw, I’m good,” he said before he turned around and wiggled his ass, his t-shirt hanging out of the back pocket of his swim trunks. “I’ll put it on if I get cold.” 

“Well, once we get to the room, you definitely won’t be putting on any more clothes,” Mike whispered close to Chester’s ear as the elevator door opened. “There won’t be any need for that.” He kissed the outside of his earlobe and stepped into the elevator.

Chester followed him and pushed the button for their floor before he turned and ran a finger down Mike’s shirt front. “See? Why put it on now when I’ll be taking it off in less than five minutes? That’s a waste of energy.” 

“I definitely don’t want you to waste energy,” Mike murmured, shifting his body closer to Chester’s and holding his drink out to the side. “I want you to have lots of energy.” He leaned forward and caught Chester’s bottom lip between his teeth, lightly giving him a bite around his lip ring. “You are so fuckin’ sexy, you know that?” 

He cut his eyes over to the elevator display. “This is the slowest elevator ever.” 

Chester’s fingers feathered up the side of Mike’s face, and around to his earring. He tugged on it lightly. “I think you have us confused,” he said before leaning in close and pressing his lips to Mike’s warm cheek. “You’re the sexy one here, Sexy Boy.” 

“Whatever,” Mike said as the elevator chimed and announced their arrival on the eighth floor. “Thank goodness. This whole day has been nothing but waiting for stuff.” He was out of the elevator and halfway down the hall in a heartbeat. He was ready to ditch the drink and throw Chester down on the bed - or up against the wall - or bend him over the bathroom sink where they could watch in the mirror. He didn’t know which, but it was going to be on as soon as they walked into the room. 

It took him two tries with the key card, Chester teasing him from close over his left shoulder before they stepped inside. Without another word he turned and took Chester’s drink right out of his hand, setting both glasses down on the small table inside the door before he dropped the towel on the floor. Before his boyfriend could even protest the loss of his drink, Mike had pulled Chester close, one hand cupped around his damp, swim trunk covered ass and the other on the back of his head. He was finished waiting for what he wanted. He wanted Chester right then, despite the taste of chlorine that was lingering on the soft skin Mike was dragging his lips over recklessly. The gasp of surprise from his lover was exactly what he wanted to hear. It was good to know that he wasn’t predictable, even if he was impatient. 

Chester had managed to slip an arm around his boyfriend’s waist. He tried to kiss back, tried to get his lips on Mike’s neck, or even his shoulder, but he was being overpowered. He could feel his dick starting to get hard as Mike squeezed his ass, as he spun him around and started to walk him toward the king sized bed that was still neatly made with dark green sheets and blankets. Chester shut his eyes, his head feeling a little light from the alcohol as he moaned with his mouth open. 

The second Mike felt the back of Chester’s legs hit the bed he stopped, the thought occurring to him that they both still had on wet clothes. “It’s time to get out of these,” he said, running his hand from Chester’s ass around to the front of his swim trunks. He wasted no time tugging them down, the progress hindered slightly by the dampness of the fabric. Mike dropped to his knees as he pulled them to Chester’s ankles, and felt his boyfriend steady himself with a hand on his shoulder as he shifted so he could step out of them one leg at a time. In front of him, directly in line with his mouth, was his boyfriend’s cock, and he didn’t need to think to run both palms up Chester’s thighs and around to his butt to hold him in place as he swallowed him down in one hot, slick movement. 

Chester’s hands were still on Mike’s shoulders, as he felt his boyfriend’s warm lips - then his mouth - pull him in. Chester’s head went back, his eyes closed. His fingers curled into the fabric of Mike’s shirt as his shaft stiffened even more. Chester’s mouth fell open as he breathed, as the tingles of pleasure and the pulling and sucking of Mike’s mouth and tongue made his legs quake. One hand left Mike’s shoulder to fondle around his ear - the back of his ear in that spot he knew his lover had a weakness for. Even though they had spent the weekend indulging in each other’s bodies, it hadn’t been this. It had been work, and even with Mike, Chester knew the difference. 

As much as he liked the taste and feel of Chester in his mouth, Mike was done the moment he felt the gentle caress around his ear. There had been enough foreplay, and his body felt tight with need that was no longer willing to wait. He slowly pulled off Chester’s wet cock, standing to shed his own clothes as quickly as possible while Chester found the edge of the bed and caught himself there, his breaths heavy as he watched Mike from lidded eyes. 

“I brought something for us,” Mike said as he kicked away his clothes and the towel that had been around his waist. “Give me a sec.” He dug around in his overnight bag quickly, then put his hand behind his back, keeping his prize hidden as he got back between Chester’s knees. “Close your eyes.”

Chester hesitated for a second, giving Mike a quick look up and down before he did what he was told. “Okay, they’re closed,” he said, trying to keep the grin off his face. “What are you up to?” 

Mike didn’t say anything as he slipped his new favorite piece of Chester’s wardrobe around his neck, buckling the black leather collar into place before hooking a finger under it and pulling on it enough to encourage his boyfriend to stand up. He knew he hadn’t pulled too hard but the blood rushed to Chester’s cheeks anyway, staining them a shade of pink that made Mike’s dick twitch in response. “Fuck, I love this on you so much,” he husked, pulling Chester into his body and crushing their lips together, his finger still tugging him close.

The moment Chester felt the familiar leather around his neck, and the pull Mike had given him, Chester’s eyes shot open, and his body felt a hard rush of arousal. “Me too,” he managed to get out, his hands and fingers gripping at Mike’s naked back. “You think of everything,” he half growled as he got his teeth into Mike’s shoulder. He latched on hard enough to suck the skin, intending to leave a nice mark, one that would last a few days and he could kiss it tomorrow and the next day as a reminder of their night in Palm Springs. 

Something inside Mike took over as he felt Chester’s teeth, an urge to push his body against the closest hard surface and pin him down, a hunger to dominate, to control. There was no thought as he grabbed Chester’s hips and pulled him around to back him into the wall next to the bed, pressing him tightly between the wall and his own body until he felt Chester’s teeth release his skin with a rush of air between them. “Biting, Ches? You’re so bad, you’re gonna leave marks you know.” 

Mike slid one hand up Chester’s side, over his shoulder and up his neck, skipping the collar to hold his chin steady between his fingers. “You’d better be careful, or I just might have to fuck you right here against this wall. Except that you’d probably like that.” He stared into Chester’s eyes, knowing his pupils were blown as wide in arousal as his boyfriend’s were, his stare deep and dark and enticing. 

Even though they hadn’t done much yet, Chester’s heart was pounding. He could feel his dick rubbing up against Mike’s, both of them already starting to drip with precum. He reached to get his hand between his chest and Mike’s, to tease his nipple or to touch the nice hickey he’d left on his lover’s shoulder, but Mike’s hold on his chin held firm, his elbows pulling in and keeping Chester from entering. “Anywhere,” Chester breathed. “Anywhere you want.” 

Pressing his hips forward, Mike pinned Chester to the wall before he smiled, moving the hand that had been holding his lover’s hip up, resting his palm flat against the wall beside Chester’s ear. “Anywhere. Perfect.” He released his grip on Chester’s chin and fluidly moved two fingers to tap against his lips. “Open up,” he whispered, watching Chester’s lips part under his touch so he could suck on Mike’s fingers. He couldn’t help the whimper that escaped him as he felt Chester’s tongue all around him, eagerly providing the saliva that was going to be their lubrication in the moment. Mike wasn’t about to step away to solve that problem, this solution would have to do.

He pulled his fingers away and connected their lips in a rushed kiss, sucking Chester’s bottom lip into his mouth and pulling at the lip ring with his teeth again before they broke apart. With his lips hovering close to his boyfriend’s, Mike barely mouthed “turn around.” He took a half step back to let Chester turn, and then he was back on him, pressing his dick into the soft spot between Chester’s butt cheeks. 

Mike leaned in close, his lips on the back of Chester’s neck. Trailing his hand down his lover’s back, he came to a stop under the curve of one ass cheek, his wet fingers probing, whispering, “spread your legs for me, babe.”

Chester’s hands were on the wall as he did as he was told, spreading his legs a good three feet apart. “Is that enough?” he asked, his head half turning, but he couldn’t really see his lover behind him, just the glimpse of his naked shoulder.

Mike didn’t answer, just hovered his mouth close to Chester’s skin and breathed out warm air, letting his lips barely skim his neck. He could feel the involuntary shiver he caused, and he smiled slightly as he shifted his hips back to make room for his hand between Chester’s ass cheeks. There were no words as he pushed his middle finger inside his boyfriend’s anal cavity, the instant warmth around his finger bringing the blood to his own face. He pulled his other hand down Chester’s shoulder blade and then grabbed onto his hip, holding him in place against the wall as he moved his finger around, still breathing close on Chester’s neck. 

The temperature in the room seemed to shoot up while they stood, pressed together and against the wall, while Mike added another finger and listened to his boyfriend’s whimpers. _I could. I could fuck him right here against this wall, if I wanted to._ The thought sent sparks through his stomach, and he moved his lips to Chester’s ear, declaring in a hot whisper, “I’m gonna fuck you right here.”

Chester’s head was back a little, his eyes closed as his bottom tingled with a mix of burn and pleasure. He wanted more. He wanted another finger, or better, he wanted Mike’s dick. He agreed to the wall plan without thought, a humming sounding escaping his throat as he bumped his ass back a little to give him some breathing room between his dick and the wall. He was pretty sure he’d already left a few wet marks on the fancy light green and gold wallpaper. He’d have to clean that up later, but right now he just needed to touch himself. He reached down, his fingers knowingly slipping over his leaking head and then his shaft, the rolls of pleasure doubling as he felt Mike’s fingers go a little deeper the more he pushed his ass out from the wall. 

“Fuck, Ches.” Mike knew his boyfriend was touching himself and the thought was driving him crazy. “You’re so fucking hot. And _mine._ ” He met Chester’s push and his fingers went as deep as he could get them, scissoring and spreading him open so that Mike could get inside, where he wanted to be. He kissed down the side of Chester’s neck, short, wet kisses with little nips of his teeth, until he got to the collar. Something animalistic was taking him over, and without a thought he latched his teeth around the collar and gave it a tight tug, pulling it back toward him as he held on to Chester’s hip. There was something like a moan or a growl that came from the back of his throat, and as he pulled harder, he withdrew his fingers, grabbing his cock and smearing the precum over his head. He was going to do it, right here. Chester hadn’t said no, and that was enough for Mike. 

The moment Chester felt the tug on the collar, his neck stretched as he was pulled, and a second later he felt the collar being tugged even harder. A gasp came out of Chester’s mouth as he let himself go, both his hands going back to the wall as his balance and stance were completely put under Mike’s control. His cock, stiff and dripping, jumped in excitement the harder his boyfriend pulled on his neck, and Chester could already feel the trembles of what was boiling just underneath the surface. If Mike could manage to get inside of him in this position, it would be short lived. Chester’s heart was already pounding. His orgasm would come quick, and he knew it would be glorious. 

With a shake of his head, Mike pulled one more time on the collar before he let go, his voice raspy with desire as he commanded, “yeah, hold on to that wall.” He used both hands to spread Chester’s ass cheeks further apart for him and he squatted down just enough to help him line things up. His knees were shaking with anticipation and excitement, and he felt the head of his dick lined up with Chester’s opening. He didn’t want to hurt his boyfriend, but it wasn’t the easiest position to manage. He dropped one hand to help guide himself, and used his legs to help him thrust upwards.

There was resistance, a lack of lubrication, and Mike hesitated for a second. He knew Chester would tell him to stop if it hurt, and he tried to go carefully, pushing until he felt his head pop through the ring of muscle and felt Chester’s body suck him inside. “Oh, fuck, Ches,” he breathed, his thighs burning as he used them for leverage. His teeth were right next to Chester’s shoulder and he didn’t miss the opportunity to bite down, claiming his territory as he continued to push inside.

Chester’s nails dug into the wall, his teeth clamped down on his bottom lip. It burned, and it hurt as Mike’s thick cock made its way inside of him, but he didn’t want it to stop. Years of experience told him that if he could just make it past this, the rest would be great. It was always uncomfortable, but the lack of lubricant was making it feel like his asshole was being washed with sandpaper. “Mike,” he panted, his eye squeezed shut. “God, Mike, you’re dry.” 

That was all it took for Mike’s teeth to let go, for the fantasy of sex against the wall to come to a screeching halt. “Damn it,” he mumbled, “I thought it would be enough. I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” he said breathlessly, trying carefully to withdraw. “I’m sorry,” he said again, letting Chester go and stepping back. “I got ahead of myself, I think.” 

Chester let his head drop against the wall as he breathed. He didn’t want to move. After a dry entry and then a dryer exit, his ass was sore. “It’s okay,” he managed to get out. He could feel his forehead sticking to the wallpaper from the ring of sweat he’d worked up. “We brought the lube, didn’t we? Tell me you remembered,” he said, with a slight part to his lips as he smiled. “If not, I know some quick I-forgot-the-lube fixes we can do.” He took another deep breath before he flipped himself around, his damp back resting against the wall now as he looked at his boyfriend, who had lost a bit of his commanding stance. “Sexy Boy,” Chester cooed as he left the wall to take the few steps to meet his lover, his hand going to his shoulder. “It’s okay,” he assured him. “We’ll get you slicked up, and then it will be back on.” 

Mike caught Chester’s hand and brought it to his lips for a kiss. “I’ve got the lube, but if I hurt you… we can always switch.” He looked at his lover’s beautiful eyes and wondered if he should apologize again, but Chester didn’t look upset. “Whatever you want. I don’t know what’s gotten into me, sometimes you make me feel a little bit crazy. Reckless, even. I don’t want to be that way.” He dropped Chester’s hand and made a move for his bag, knowing their lube was in the side pocket where he’d stashed it that morning.

He took a deep breath as he straightened up and turned back to face Chester, waving the lube in the air. “Don’t know why I didn’t get this when I got the collar. Too excited, I think. You do things to me, Ches. I can’t even think straight sometimes.”

Chester ran a hand over his face as he thought. He wasn’t sure why, but it seemed like this was one of those moments where he needed to make the right choice. “I like you being a little wild,” he admitted as he let his hand fall down his cheek, then onto his neck before he wrapped his fingers around the collar. He tugged on it, though that didn’t have the same effect as when his lover did it. “And I fucking love this.” His eyes were locked with Mike’s, both of them stuck with space between them before Chester said, “it hurt, Mike, but I’m okay. It temporarily hurt. No big deal. I’m okay. Now, how about we split the difference?” 

_I fucking hurt him. I don’t want to be like that. It’s not just about what I want, it should never be about that. And yet he’s still looking at me with love that I don’t feel like I deserve right now._ Mike quirked an eyebrow at Chester’s last words, trying to figure out what he was talking about when he said split the difference. “How do we do that? What do you mean?” His hand was still closed tightly around the lube and they were just steps from the bed. _Tell me what to do to make it better and I will. Anything._

Chester stuck his hand out, curling his fingers through the air. “Gimme the lube, and get on the bed on your back.” 

Mike dropped the lube in Chester’s hand, backing toward the bed until he felt it behind him, then scooting into the center. He didn’t know what Chester had in mind, but it didn’t matter. Anything would be okay with him right now. Anything Chester wanted to do to him would work. He ran a hand over his chest and down to his stomach, stopping short of grabbing his half-hard erection and helping himself out. He didn’t feel like he had the right to do anything at the moment. 

Chester stood at the edge of the bed, watching. “Mike, come on,” he said, his voice light. “I’m fine. Battle scars, Sexy Boy. A little dry run is nothing. Now, don’t touch,” he ordered with a smile on his lips as he crawled onto the bed, pushing Mike’s legs together before he straddled them. He squeezed a healthy amount of lube into his hand and leaned forward, wrapping his fingers around Mike’s dick. He slicked his hand up and down, making sure to coat every inch of his shaft and over his head. He tossed Mike a wyly look as he felt his boyfriend’s hard on grow stronger as he stroked him. “You’re only going to have two jobs, okay?” 

Mike bit down on his bottom lip as he watched Chester, enjoying the feel of his wet hand gliding over him. “What’s that?” he asked, his worries starting to melt away as his boyfriend coaxed his dick back to the party. Everything was better now, with Chester sitting on top of him, touching him that way.

Chester slowed his hand, letting his fingers run slowly up Mike’s shaft as he squeezed, putting the most pressure on Mike’s head and then to his slit before he’d slide his hand back down and do it all again. “Number one, I want at least one hand on this collar,” he said, his free hand reaching to tug on the leather. “And number two, and more importantly, I want you to enjoy the hell out of this.” He let Mike go, and after scooting forward and moving his ass around, he positioned himself to be penetrated. “I’m in control,” he said, flashing Mike a quick feisty look, which included his tongue swiping across his lips and toying with his piercing for a second before he lowered himself slowly onto Mike’s hard cock. He hesitated only once when he first felt the intrusion, but he pushed past it with ease as the lube did its work. “Fuuuuck” he moaned as he let Mike’s length go most of the way in, halting at about the three-fourths mark. He waited, letting his own body adjust before he leaned forward, his head going close to Mike’s ear. “I love you.” 

“God, I love you, too,” Mike managed to get out as he fumbled to get his fingers around the collar. He just wanted to savor the feel of his dick being engulfed in Chester’s warmth again, but he’d promised a hand on that collar, and he was going to deliver. He got two fingers underneath it and gave it a good tug, turning his lips into Chester’s cheek and kissing him there before he cautiously shifted his hips upward. He didn’t want to do too much when he’d been told not to, but lying still was driving him crazy. He’d been the one offering to switch things up, and this was what Chester wanted, but he didn’t know if that meant he could drop a hand to Chester’s hip and pull him down or not… but he did anyway.

The tug on the collar sent Chester’s thrusts into action. He started slowly, pulling his hips back and then pushing them forward, letting their bodies melt together. He felt Mike’s hand go to his hip, and he increased his speed, to meet the need he could feel coming off his lover. Chester raised himself up just a little for leverage, his head still down as Mike hung onto the collar. 

Everything felt tight, pleasure surging through Mike’s body as Chester moved, as he pulled his boyfriend by the hip and the collar. He could feel Chester’s erection pressed into his stomach, the wet, sticky precum he was dripping onto his skin. He wanted Chester’s lips, he wanted to taste him, and he kissed across his jaw until he could connect their lips, his hand tight around the leather as he claimed Chester’s mouth with his tongue. They were connected at every point, their bodies tight against each other as Chester kept a steady pace on top of him. He could feel the building sensation in his balls, and he knew it wouldn’t be long until he came, but he wasn’t sure about Chester, if needed to get a hand in between them and around his boyfriend’s cock. He wanted to be a considerate lover, but he didn’t want to stop guiding his boyfriend’s thrusts with the hand on his hip, everything was feeling too good. 

Chester could take the pace as he wanted, shoving Mike deeper inside of himself or less when he wanted to. He could control the sensation, and the speed, and as he did, his own cock was getting its own workout as it rubbed between their bodies. A layer of sweat was acting as a second lubricant all around Chester’s dick, and he could feel the amount of precum he was leaving on his lover. His legs were going stiff as he worked, his insides coiled as he shoved himself down a little harder on Mike’s length. “Fuck, Mike,” he moaned as he pulled out of their kiss. His orgasm was coming, and he wasn’t sure if he could hold it much longer. He spread his legs just a little further apart as he shoved his hips down, and he felt the head of Mike’s dick hit his prostate. He clawed his fingers into the bed on either side of Mike’s head, his thrusts hitting overdrive as something carnal took over. 

“Yes, yes,” Mike answered him, pulling tighter on the collar. He knew Chester liked it, and he was no longer worried about needing to help his boyfriend out. Mike could tell he was close from the sound of his voice. He curled his fingers into a fist around the leather and gave it one good yank as he growled, “come for me, babe.” 

Chester’s mouth was open as he breathed hard. He felt his balls tighten and then release, the roar of his orgasm blasting through his body like fire. His eyes shot open as he felt his dick jerk and shoot cum once and then again. His head dropped as Mike pulled on the collar. Chester’s teeth clenched as he rode his orgasm out, never letting up on Mike’s hard shaft that was deep inside of him and pressed into just the right space. 

Mike held on while he felt Chester’s orgasm, the squeeze of his ass around his dick, the warm stickiness that spread between them, the trembling of his boyfriend’s body and the moans that went with it all. He kept his grip firm on the collar until Chester was finished, watching the pleasure roll over him and then away. It was his most favorite thing to watch. “You’re fucking beautiful,” he whispered, letting go of the collar and planting a kiss on his lover’s cheek, then dropping his hand to take both Chester’s hips between them. He knew it would just be a few more strokes into Chester’s sated body before he would feel the same release, and he brought his hips up as he pulled Chester down. It was perfect. Even if it wasn’t sex against the wall, Chester had made it perfect. Mike pushed up a couple more thrusts and his chin came up, pressing the back of his head into the mattress as he felt the first wave of his orgasm flow over him, felt his cum coating the inside of his boyfriend’s body. It wasn’t rushed, and he pulled Chester down as he felt all the tension release in two more slow, warm, full body waves of pleasure. He never wanted it to end, his movements against his boyfriend slowing, trying to keep the sensations going as long as he could. 

As the tingles in his legs died out he gave up on prolonging it any more, running one hand up Chester’s sweaty back as he went still, letting them both rest together for a moment. He could feel Chester’s heart beating against his own chest, and he felt and heard both of their breaths as they started to slow from the quick, post-orgasm pants and gasps. He felt thoroughly worn out as he let both hands fall down to his sides on the bed. “Damn, Ches, that was, that was, something else.” 

“I’m glad you liked it,” Chester mumbled as his sweaty head clung to the pillow, his lips close enough to Mike’s face to taste his salty skin as he spoke. “Because I think I’m stuck,” he half laughed. “I think I’ve glued myself to you with cum.” 

“Not a problem,” Mike said tiredly. “We’ll just stay like this forever. I could never move again and that would be alright with me.” 

“Okay. Deal,” Chester said, his eyes closed as his mind slipped in and out of sleep. He was exhausted, and the very thought of moving was agonizing, even though he knew it needed to be done. _I need to clean myself off. I need to clean Mike off. I really need to the clean the wall off. And I’ve gotta pee._ He let out a tired breath before he opened his eyes, and slowly started to lift his body. His legs were stiff, and he knew climbing off of Mike’s dying erection was going to suck. “Don’t move,” he said in less than a commanding voice as he eased himself to a sitting position. He stopped, looking down at Mike’s lidded eyes, and the goofy grin that was across his face. “You look like you just won the lottery,” Chester giggled before he shifted his weight, and slowly pulled one leg back the other way, letting Mike’s cock slide a little roughly out and flop over to one side before Chester collapsed onto the bed. 

“I hate that part,” Mike mumbled, lifting a hand to drop on Chester’s back. “It’s like winning the lottery and then having someone take it away.” He wanted to melt into the bed. It had been a long day - up early to pack, the drive, the hiking, the Mexican food, everything. The idea of getting up and showering was an awful prospect. “It’s not our bed,” he half slurred, his body fighting sleep. “Let’s just go to sleep. Quick clean up and teeth brushing, and then sleep. We can shower in the morning.” 

“Okay,” Chester groaned. “I have to pee. I’m going first,” he decided, not caring what Mike had to say about it at the moment. He rolled over, and a second later he was on his feet, his body swaying. He felt like he was half drunk as he stumbled to the bathroom, ready to pee and wash himself off. _And the wall. Can’t forget about the wall._ He didn’t bother to shut the bathroom door as he stepped in and turned on the bright light that felt like daggers going into his eyes. 

Mike knew if he lay in the bed while Chester did his bathroom thing, he’d fall asleep. With a pained groan he sat up, running a hand through his hair as he tried to gather his thoughts. _Pajamas. I need pajamas. Underwear. Ugh._ He swung his legs over the side of the bed and slowly stood up, feeling the fatigue of the day’s events weighing heavily on him. He dug around in his bag for his things, then cocked his head to the side. Chester hadn’t gotten his clothes before he went into the bathroom. “Ches?” he called, “you want me to grab your pajamas?” 

“Yeah!” Chester called from the bathroom as he stood by the sink, looking at himself in the mirror and the disgraceful state his mohawk was in as he picked at it. “Just clean underwear and my pajama pants!” The idea of sleeping with clothes on wasn’t a fun one, but he wasn’t at home. He was in a borrowed bed, and that meant biting the bullet and wearing something other than his birthday suit to crash in.

Even though Chester couldn’t see him, Mike nodded as he turned to Chester’s suitcase on the floor next to his bag. He unzipped the main compartment and opened it, reaching in to move aside a pile of neatly folded clothes that he knew Chester wouldn’t have time to wear. He smiled at his boyfriend’s tendency to overpack and his love of clothes, spotting the requested pajama pants at the bottom of the pile. _Better just move the pile, if I wrinkle everything up he’ll be upset._ He slid the clothes over and pulled out the pajama pants, and his smile faded as he spotted a bottle of rum underneath the clothes. _What is that doing in here? Why in the world did he bring that? No wonder this suitcase was so heavy._

He sat back on his heels and looked down into the suitcase for a second, his mind suddenly a bit more alert. _It’s almost a full bottle. We’re only staying one night, did he think we were just going to stay in and drink all night? I mean, maybe he brought it because we’re not old enough to buy it. But he’s got a fake i.d., so that doesn’t make any sense. I wonder if he’d be mad if I asked about it. Is he trying to hide it? Or does it matter?_ Mike flicked his eyes toward the bathroom. He’d already screwed things up twice today, once with the whole Chris incident, and then again trying to assert his dominance against the wall. They were in a good place right now. 

He quickly decided it didn’t matter. They were about to go to sleep, and there wouldn’t be a reason to bring out the rum. He covered the bottle back over with the rest of Chester’s clothes and stood up, both their pajamas in his hands. _The rum doesn’t matter. I’m sure I’m just overthinking it._ “I’m coming,” he called, stepping toward the bathroom. 

Chester walked out into the room, leaving the bathroom light on. “Thanks,” he said, his fingernails lazily scratching over his naked belly as he yawned. He took his pajamas from Mike, as they passed each other before Chester spun around and headed toward the door. He scooped his abandoned rum and Coke up from the little table where Mike had left it. “I’m thirsting to death,” he muttered as he headed back toward the bed, gulping it down quickly. 

Mike brushed his teeth and cleaned himself off, slipping on his underwear and pajamas before he clicked off the bathroom light. The bed was calling his name, and he couldn’t wait to crawl in beside Chester and fall asleep. He smiled at the sight of his boyfriend, already covered to his chin in blankets, as he stepped toward the bed.

Just before he reached to turn off the lamp, his eyes stopped on the empty glass on Chester’s side of the bed. He frowned as he glanced back toward to door where he’d left their drinks when they came in. His glass was still there, but Chester had gone back and finished his, and Mike’s thoughts tumbled right back to the bottle of rum in Chester’s suitcase. He stood next to the bed for a second, struggling with the thought of saying something or letting it go. _Just because he finished that drink doesn’t mean he had any more. I wasn’t even in the bathroom that long. I’m sure he didn’t have more than that. He was just thirsty, there’s nothing else to drink. I’m thirsty. Water would be nice. But I can wait. He was just thirsty. I’m not going to bring it up, not tonight. Even if it does seem like he’s been drinking a little more lately. Here and there. But it’s not a lot. It’s fine. Everything is fine._

He slid his eyes over his boyfriend’s face one more time before he turned off the light and crawled into bed beside him. Mike snuggled up close behind Chester, an arm around his waist pulling him close as he dropped a few light kisses to his lover’s shoulder. _It’s not a big deal. You’re worrying yourself for no reason. It’s not like he’s drinking every night._ With a yawn, Mike settled his head down onto his pillow. “Good night, babe,” he whispered, letting his body drift away into troubled dreams. 

****  
TBC


	30. Promo Weekend

Chester inspected his collection of clothes that were carefully hung in order in his small closet. His YRS private space wasn’t much, but he’d grown used to it. Even now, with Mike’s clothes added into the mix, they’d managed to make it work. Chester ran a hand over his row of shirts, his fingers touching each one briefly before he shut the door and turned around. His boyfriend was just finishing putting away clean socks and underwear from his backpack, and Chester had to smile. They were more than a month in now with Mike working side by side with him, and things had more or less gone smoothly. 

_There was sort of a rocky start, but we got through it. It’s been okay and this weekend will be too. Two days and we can go home._ Chester walked over to the bed and sat down, absently brushing off the legs of his dark blue skinny jeans and then the front of his white v-neck t-shirt. “You about ready? Not sure where everyone is, but it’s already after nine.” He looked at his watch - it was fifteen minutes past nine, and they’d yet to hear Mark barking at them to hurry up, that time was money. In fact, they hadn’t heard anything from Mark since they’d stepped through the front doors of the Los Angeles Hills house. But it wasn’t just Mark, other than greeting Adam at the front door, Mike and Chester hadn’t seen or heard anyone yet. 

“Yeah,” Mike said, coming over to sit next to Çhester on the bed. “Maybe we can just stay here until someone comes to find us. Maybe they’ll forget we’re supposed to be here or something.” He reached for Chester’s hand as he looked out the window. “I mean, I know they won’t, but it’s nice to pretend.” 

“If we’re not working, I’d rather just go home,” Chester said, squeezing Mike’s hand before he stood up, and he pulled his boyfriend with him. He popped a quick kiss to his lips before he said, “Come on, let’s go find everyone.” He heard Mike mumble another offer to stay in their room instead, but Chester led the way to the door. “Believe me, Mike, hiding doesn’t work and it turns into more drama.” 

“This place is full of drama,” Mike agreed with a huff in his voice, following closely behind Chester. “It’s weirdly quiet,” he added, his tone lowering to something cautious. “I thought everyone was on this weekend. Right? Isn’t that this weekend?” He looked around the upstairs as they made their way down the hall. 

“Yeah, and usually when we’re all here this place is like a freakin’ monkey cage.” Chester glanced over to catch Mike’s smile before they got to the top of the stairs and headed down. “It’s almost scary how quiet it is.” 

_I don’t know if I will ever be as casual about all this as he is. I don’t know if I will ever be here and not be worrying. I don’t like the way Mark looks at us, especially Chester. And where is everyone?_ Mike reached out to tug on the back of Chester’s shirt. “There’s not a shoot on right now, right? Or we’re not supposed to be somewhere else, are we? You know I forget where we’re supposed to be half the time. I don’t want to give Mark any reason to flip out.” 

Chester scratched his head, his fingers flipping over his styled red-tipped mohawk as his eyes squinted in thought. “No. We’re supposed to be here. Adam would have said something. . .Mark would be blowing up my phone by now if we missed meeting up somewhere.” He looked over, catching the worry in Mike’s dark eyes. “We’ll find them,” he promised as he tugged on Mike’s hand and together they traversed back through the hallway. “See,” Chester announced as he pointed toward the large, open doorway of the grand piano room, “I hear ‘em now.” 

Down the hall he could already hear Jason’s distinct voice calling out commands, and the familiar chatter of Devon, Josh, Ryan, Amir, and Caleb - all of their voices ringing through Chester’s ears as they neared the room. 

They stepped in, but stopped in the doorway. The morning sunlight was flooding through the large windows, gleaming off of the white marble floors and the silk black piano. Just to the right of it, was Caleb, standing by himself as Jason stood a few feet in front of him with a camera, snapping pictures as he gave orders like, “raise your arm over your head” “open your mouth a little wider” and “stretch your back more”. 

Chester scanned the room. Mark was nowhere to be seen, but Devon and Josh were just to the left, watching Caleb do his solo work. Ryan and Amir were standing just on the other side of Jason, the two of them leaned close together as they whispered back and forth. “It’s a promo weekend,” Chester said, his voice hitting a pitch between surprised and relieved. “This is awesome,” he stated as he spun around and nudged Mike on his side. “Promo weekends are so much fun!” 

Mike scanned the room and took in the smiling faces and higher than normal level of enthusiasm with the other boys before he looked back at Chester. “Promo weekend? So, like… no scene work?” 

“Nope. No scenes this weekend. This means Jason will be updating the website with all new pics and videos of us. See,” Chester said as he pointed to Caleb, where Jason was instructing him to take his t-shirt off, leaving him in nothing but a pair of short - very short - jean shorts. “Jason will take individual pictures of everyone for our site profiles and then ones of all of us together or in couples or whatever he wants and then we’ll do, like, casual stuff with everyone and he’ll film it. He’ll film us all weekend.” 

“Casual stuff,” Mike mumbled, his mind jumping through ideas of everything that could mean. He was getting more used to appearing without his shirt on for the camera, but he still wasn’t comfortable being around the other guys like that. There was something about it that made him feel far too vulnerable, not withstanding the fact that he wasn’t exactly cut like the others. He sighed and looked down at his jeans and open flannel over his black t-shirt. Despite Chester’s objections, when Mike wasn’t being told what to wear by Mark or Jason, he still preferred what Chester called his body armor. “Sounds like fun,” he tried, looking at Ryan and wishing he could take his shirt off anywhere but in front of Chester’s former partner - even if they were sort of friends now. 

“It is fun,” Chester agreed quickly. “It’s kind of like being on one of those reality tv shows for the weekend. You’ll see.” He looked across the room, to see Ryan waving at him. “Come on,” Chester said, motioning for Mike to follow him. “What’s up, boys?” Chester said as they passed Josh and Devon, offering them a goofy smile.” 

“Chaz, ‘bout time you got here,” Devon said, jovially. “And hey, Mike,” he offered next. “It’s your first promo weekend, isn’t it?” he asked, his excitement practically bursting from his face as he waited. 

“Yeah,” Mike answered, and he couldn’t help but smile back at Devon’s enthusiasm. “Chester says it’s a fun weekend, he better be right!” He poked Chester in the side and smiled as if to say ‘I’m trying, see?’ 

“Oh, it’s a blast, man,” Josh offered, and he reached to tap Mike’s arm. “Even this part is fun. Different,” he offered with a slight pause of thoughtfulness. “Not sure where Toby’s at. He’s not answering his phone. He’s supposed to be here, too.” He pulled his cell phone from his pocket, and Devon did the same, like they were sharing thoughts. 

“Mark will be pissed at him if he blows this off,” Devon mumbled before he looked up, not wanting Jason to catch what they were saying. “We all have to take our turns first,” he said, looking between Chester and Mike, but then back to Chester. “Please, Chaz, okay? Ry and Amir already said they would. We need to buy Toby more time. . .wherever his lazy ass is.”

Chester nodded without a second thought. “Sure, not a problem. And he’ll show up. You know how he is, he has guy issues.” He let out a sigh as he crossed his arms. “He’s probably in the middle of some dramatic argument with his current stud.” 

“Who’s up next?” Jason called from across the room, looking at the group standing together quietly discussing Toby’s personal drama. “We’re about finished over here, I need another one of you ready to go!”

Mike’s attention moved from Chester to Jason, then to Caleb. “Oh my God, Chester. He’s, like, totally naked!” Mike hissed. “I have to do that too? No way.” His eyes darted to the hallway as he planned an escape route. It was true that he’d been behind the cameras six weekends now, but those shoots were closed set. The idea of taking his clothes - all of his clothes - off in front of everyone made his stomach roll sickeningly. 

“It’s nothing, Mike,” Chester quickly assured him. “It’s just pictures for the site, and Jason’s doing it, which means it’s quick and to the point.” He looked around again. “Mark’s not here?” 

Josh shook his head. “Haven’t seen him, but Jason was grumbling when he started with Caleb, so Mark’s here somewhere in the house.” 

“And Chaz is right,” Devon offered, looking at Mike with a bit of sympathy. “You’ve been here for weeks now. Trust me,” he said, motioning toward the photo area, “this will be a piece of cake compared to what you’ve been doing.” 

_At least Mark’s not around to bark orders at me. I fucking hate him._ Mike pushed his fingers through his blue tipped hair and scowled. “I don’t know why it has to be in front of everyone,” he grumbled, not missing the gentle eye rolling and indulgent looks from the others. He knew they thought he wasn’t cut out for this business, but none of them really understood his motivation either. Sometimes he didn’t even understand it, but he knew if he had to strip down in front of his coworkers to make Chester’s life easier, he’d suck it up, bite his tongue, and get to it.

“I’ll go,” Mike called to Jason. “Just to get it over with,” he added softer as he looked at Chester’s face that was a mix of stunned and amused. 

“Good for you,” Chester had to say, and Josh and Devon both offered their agreement before Chester took Mike by the elbow and headed him off toward where Ryan and Amir were standing. “It’s easy, Mike. Jason will tell you exactly what to do. Like, fifteen minutes flat. Then you can get dressed and I’ll go next and when I’m done we can go do whatever till the others are done and then we’ll do the group shots.” 

Mike slid his arm around Chester and squeezed his side. “Maybe you can distract them all from looking at me,” he whispered in his boyfriend’s ear. “That’s your official job now.” 

Chester leaned into Mike’s embrace. “I think you’ll be fine without me causing distractions. Besides, Jason likes a quiet set, even with promos.” They stopped beside Ryan and Amir as Jason was taking a few last shots of Caleb holding his cock and making a few erotic gestures. 

“Chazzy, Mike,” Ryan offered in a hushed voice. “I’m so glad this is a promo weekend. When Jay told me I almost jumped up and down.” He cocked a smile their way before he slicked his hand over his black hair, his eyes drifting back over to his boyfriend; Jason always looked so stunning with his camera. His dark hair was pushed behind his ears, and the tighter jeans he had on today really made his ass stand out. He had on a simple dark purple shirt, and Ryan let out a longing sigh. _At least we’ll get to spend more time together over the next few days._ “Promo weekends are my favorite,” he mumbled, forcing himself to look away from his lover. 

“You mean, you _don’t_ like the weekends where you get to fuck me?” Amir asked, cutting his eyes sideways at Ryan and clicking his tongue. “And here I thought we were really clicking these days, Ry-Ry.” He watched Caleb pull his clothes on with disinterest. “It could always be worse than me, you know.”

“You’re such a drama queen,” Ryan shot back at him. “And yeah, I know. Believe me, I know how lucky I am I got you.” He tossed Amir a soft smile and a playful bump of his hips. “But I get to spend more real time with Jay over these weekends,” he added, his blue eyes darting over toward the doorway, like he was worried Mark might be standing there. He took a long swallow before looking back at Amir. “Our fucking is good, but, you know,” he said, nodding toward his boyfriend. 

“Oh, I know,” Amir purred before he rolled his eyes, “but it’s not loooo-ve,” he said in a sing-song voice, enjoying the pink flush that spread over Ryan’s cheeks. “Maybe everyone will get their shit done fast and you guys can escape for a minute or two,” he went on, more serious than before. “Shit, I have no idea how you two manage. I know it sucks.” Even if it was fun to tease Ryan, Amir tried to be sensitive to the jumbled emotions his friend and partner dealt with every day.

“Mike! Let’s go!” Jason called, turning toward the group Chester and Mike had been standing with a few minutes ago, then making a wide circle looking for him. “Oh, there you are. Come on, you volunteered to go next.” He let his eyes linger on Ryan for an extra moment before he turned thoughtfully to the piano. “Come over here and play something. We’ll start there.”

Mike pressed a quick kiss to Chester’s cheek before he slipped away and over to the piano bench. Sometimes when the shoots were over for the day, he asked to play on the baby grand just to soothe his tired nerves. He wasn’t sure how he felt about something so personal to him being used in the promo shoot, but as he opened his mouth to object, Jason went on.

“Take your shirt off, this can’t look like an advertisement for the Berkeley College of Music or something.” Jason watched Mike’s expression change from mildly uncomfortable to something painfully sad, and for a second, he felt like an asshole for his choice of words. He knew Mike’s ultimate goals when it came to his playing, and he knew via Ryan the job MIke had given up to come to YRS in the first place. But it was too late to change his mind now, that would only signal to the others that they had some choice in their shoots.

“Okay,” Mike said softly, running his hand over the top of the piano before he looked over at Chester. _Just do it, Mike, whatever he asks, and get it done. Then you and Chester can go do something else while they finish in here. Just get it over with._

Chester watched as his boyfriend hesitated. “Let me help,” he offered quickly as he sprinted over to where Mike was sitting on the piano bench. “I’ll take this off for you,” he said, pressing himself up close to Mike’s back as he leaned down and kissed his neck. “Remember to smile,” he whispered as he pulled Mike’s flannel off his shoulders, and then dropped down to pull it from his arms. He could already hear Jason’s camera clicking as he stood back up. “And this one, too,” he said, nuzzling his lips to Mike’s ear. He felt his boyfriend shiver, but Chester knew it had to be done. He pulled on the hem of Mike’s black t-shirt, and a moment later, it was up, over, and off, leaving Mike bare chested in only his jeans. Chester kissed one of his naked shoulders on instinct. 

“That’s good, Chaz, step back. We’ll get the two of you later,” Jason said, snapping a few but knowing he had more interesting plans for them after he got their individual shots.

Mike put his head down as Jason made Chester back away. The only thing that he knew to do was to start playing. It was the only thing to take his mind off what he was doing, and it was something he could do without really thinking. He closed his eyes and let his hands move over the keys.

Chester stepped back to where Ryan and Amir still were. He had both of Mike’s shirts slung over his arm, holding them against his front as he watched his boyfriend start to play, and he smiled. 

“Wow, he’s good, Chaz,” Ryan offered. “Not that I thought he wasn’t, but it’s different actually hearing him play.” He reached over, patting Chester’s lower back. “He’s going to be alright,” he offered as he leaned close. “Jason will be easy on him.” 

Mike could hear Jason’s camera, and the low voices of the others around him, then Jason’s voice interrupting his sonata. 

“Turn around and lean back with your elbows on the keys,” Jason suggested.

Mike made a face and did as he was told, his hands feeling clammy as he exposed his chest to the room. _I hate this. This feels ridiculous._ He tried to smile genuinely as Jason gave a few more instructions, snapped a few more pictures, then suggested he lose the pants. _Okay. I can do this._ Mike looked down as he reached for the button on his jeans.

“Lean your head back. Yeah, like that. Now run your other hand down your chest,” Jason said, snapping each movement Mike made. “No, go back up. Pinch your nipple.”

From the back of the room Devon let out a whistle before he shouted, “Yeah!” 

“Take it off, Mike!” Josh offered next, the two of them clapping for a few seconds before they both let out unified “Whooohooos!” 

“Hey!” Chester hollered from the front of the room, pointing at his co-workers. “No catcalling my boyfriend!” he told them with a grin on his face. “I mean, you can catcall me all you want when I’m up there,” he made sure to tell them with a laugh, “but not my Sexy Boy.” 

Mike felt like he was in one of those dreams where he was giving a presentation in front of his high school English class and suddenly realized he was naked. He could feel his skin burn with embarrassment as he followed Jason’s directions, wishing a hole would open up in the floor and swallow him down to put him out of his misery. “Shut up, you two,” he called half-heartedly, trying to not sound completely mortified.

“Okay, that’s enough,” Jason said, motioning at Mike, “Get those pants off. And you two,” he said, fixing Devon and Josh with a stare. “You’re killing my vibe over here.”

“Oh, come on, Jason,” Devon whined. “It’s all in good fun.” 

“Yeah, we love you, Mike!” Josh offered next, but they both went quiet the moment Jason flashed them another glare. 

“Chaz, I want you in here with Mike in a minute. Actually, now, get your shirt off and get over here,” Jason called. “Mike, sit back on the bench, kick those jeans over here.” He waited for Mike to scoot his jeans over so he could take them out of the range of the camera. “Okay, you two. I want shots of Mike getting your clothes off, Chaz. Go stand between his legs.”

Chester pulled his t-shirt off and handed it, along with Mike’s shirts, over to Ryan. He let out a long breath and headed to the piano, a grin already on his face. Seeing Mike sitting naked on the piano bench was a new sight for him. He’d heard his boyfriend play on the keyboard at home, but it was always serious. It was always _work_ in its own way. But now Mike had his legs spread open, and his cock was on full display as Chester stepped right in between them. “This is hot,” he whispered just loud enough for his boyfriend to hear him. 

“It’s better with you,” Mike whispered back before he heard Jason holler, “take off his pants, Mike. Go slow. I want to get some good angles.” 

Chester knew the rules. He put his hands high on his sides, making sure not to block anything the camera would want to see. He lightly rubbed his fingers over his own skin as he kept his eyes down, letting them drift between Mike’s blue hair and his boyfriend’s skilled fingers slowly loosening his belt. Chester could already feel his cock waking up and starting to react to Mike’s naked appearance and close proximity, which was good. Promo pictures were always more fun with hard dicks. 

Chester resisted the urge to reach out and touch Mike’s head, and he looked away for a moment to try and make the thought disappear. The moment he did, he saw Mark standing by the open doorway, watching them intently. Chester looked back at Mike quickly, hoping their boss wouldn’t hang around long. 

Mike got the belt undone, then pulled at the button of Chester’s pants, unzipping them and slowly pushing them down his hips just enough to show a peek of the bright blue waistband of his white underwear. Without thinking, he leaned forward and kissed the spot between Chester’s belly button and the blue waistband. 

Chester’s eyes slid shut and his hand went right to Mike’s hair. Everything else melted away as habit came into play. He was already massaging Mike’s scalp, and then his hand was quickly on its way down to Mike’s ear, to play with the sensitive spot Chester loved to take advantage of. 

Jason frowned from behind his camera. This wasn’t going the way he intended. “That’s enough of that, Chaz, get your hands out of his hair,” he commanded, dropping the camera for a second. “We’re not shooting a scene, and damnit, these photos aren’t supposed to look romantic. I swear. The two of you make everything so hard. And Mark said having you here was going to make things easier,” Jason grumbled before he caught sight of Mark in the doorway.

Jason’s harsh tone pulled Chester right back to reality and he jerked his hand away. “Sorry,” he said, looking from Mike over to his boss. “Sorry, Jason.” He put his hand back on his side and stared straight ahead, concentrating on one of the potted plants across the room. _What the hell is wrong with me? I’m making this worse. I’m a professional. I can control myself. Even with Mike._ He pursed his lips and shut his mind off, sending it to the numb place he knew it needed to be for the next few minutes. 

“Just get his pants off, Mike,” Jason instructed. “And then I’ll snap a few of you jacking yourself, then I’ll get you by yourself, Chaz. Over here by the window so we can get some light on those tattoos.” He didn’t look over at Mark, knowing that he’d be irritated at the display of affection between his power couple. 

Mike finished undressing Chester as Jason snapped pictures, and it wasn’t all that much different from shooting a scene. He kept his eyes on Chester and tried to block everyone else out, telling himself that they weren’t really paying all that much attention to him. The truth was, none of the other guys had seen him completely naked in all the weeks he’d worked at YRS, and their curiosity was evident as they kept their conversations going and stole sneaky glances at Mike. 

“Okay, Chaz, out of the camera. Mike, stay there on the bench, but open your legs up more and get your hand around your dick. Yeah, like that,” Jason nodded, snapping the shot. “Look at me.”

Chester walked back over to stand with Ryan and Amir, his jeans and underwear over his arm as he watched his boyfriend. “He’s nervous,” he whispered to no one. 

“He’s not doing too bad. At least Jason is letting him sit down,” Ryan offered just as the familiar sound of the house chef caught his attention. He looked toward the doorway to see Brad coming in with a large basket over his arm. “Hey, snacks,” Ryan said, elbowing Chester gently before pointing. 

Chester pulled his eyes off of his lover to watch Brad make his rounds. The cook had his curly hair on full display as he went from person to person offering them something to keep their strength up. Already Chester could see bits of bread and what looked like lettuce and turkey and his smile popped onto his face as he watched Devon pull a little chocolate cake from the basket. 

“I’m starving,” Chester stated, rubbing his stomach. He looked back over at Mike. Jason was already getting him to do some dick stroking, which meant Mike’s time in front of the camera was just about over. _And then I’ll be up. How much can I eat in two minutes? Damn. Probably not enough. I’ll go for something small and I’ll eat later._

“Morning fellas,” Brad offered as he stepped up to the trio, keeping his voice down. “Would you boys like something? I’ve got sandwiches, cakes, raisins,” he told them as he showed off each item in his oversized woven basket. 

Ryan was quick to grab for half a turkey sandwich, and Chester watched in envy before his eyes lit up. “Blow pops,” he said, reaching for a cherry flavored one. “I’ll just take this one.” 

“Chaz, are you sure?” Brad asked, his eyes narrowing a little. “That’s not much. How about a sandwich or I have a pre-made salad in here somewhere,” he decided as he moved things around in the basket. 

“No, I’m good. This is perfect,” Chester assured him. “I’ll crunch it down and get to the gum,” he said with a grin as he unwrapped it and Brad was quick to collect the trash. Chester popped the sucker in his mouth, the sugary cherry taste hitting him immediately. “Fuck this is good. I haven’t had one in forever.”

“Would Mike want something?” Brad asked as he turned to see Chester’s boyfriend still being ordered into different poses. 

“Maybe,” Chester answered with a shrug. “He might be a little...jittery,” he said with a tilt of his hand, “when he gets done. From nerves.” 

“I’ll wait and see,” Brad decided as he hooked his other arm through the basket’s handle and stood back to watch. 

“That’s good, Mike,” Jason muttered, looking at the screen on his camera. He didn’t figure he’d get much more out of the blushing, uncomfortable star in front of him. He asked himself every day how they managed to get anything usable out of Mike at all, but one look at Chester reminded him of the magic those two were together. As Mike scooped up his jeans from the floor and made a beeline to Chester, Jason’s gaze settled on Ryan again, his dark hair reflecting light that was coming through the window he was standing near. Even stuffing a turkey sandwich in his mouth, Jason couldn’t help but think he was the hottest guy in the room. He smiled briefly before he called, “let’s go, Chaz.” 

Mike stepped into his boxers and jeans quickly and tugged them up as he made a silly face at Chester. “A sucker? Really?” 

Chester pulled it out of his mouth and grinned. “Don’t be a hater,” he teased before he handed his jeans and underwear off to Mike. “Be right back,” he stated cheekily before he walked over to get in front of Jason. “Okay, boss, where do you want me?” 

“Put your hands up over your head on the wall over there and turn your face to the side. I want to get a good shot of your arms,” Jason said, pointing to the wall opposite the windows the group was standing near. “The natural light from outside should do a good job of that.” 

Without a word, Chester walked over and leaned forward, pressing his hands to the wall above his head, sticking his ass out and letting the natural curve in his back show. This was nothing new, and he knew what Jason was going to call out for him to do almost before it happened. 

Jason nodded his head and clicked the camera, then moved closer. “Turn around. Back against the wall. Hands flat, close your eyes.” It was so much easier to shoot Chester than anyone else. He followed directions flawlessly and never seemed to take a bad picture. 

Chester did as he was told, making sure to give his sucker a few seductive licks for the camera before he pressed himself up against the wall. Photos were easy. They were fun. And Chester didn’t mind that he always had the rooms’ attention when he had his moment in front of the camera. Jason called for him to get down on his knees, and Chester dropped, not thinking a thing of it as he pulled the sucker from his mouth and got on his hands and knees, opening his mouth for the camera and showing off his lip ring. 

“You see that,” Ryan whispered to Mike as they watched. “He’s a natural for the camera. That’s what Jay says all the time. Not just with this stuff, but with everything.” 

Mike plucked his shirts from Ryan’s arm and pulled his t-shirt back over his head. “Of course he is. He’s like that with everything. It’s so easy for him.” It wasn’t jealousy or admiration, but something in between the two that Mike was feeling as he got dressed. _It’s not easy for me. None of this is. But nothing seems to phase Chester… and I don’t know if that’s a good thing or a bad thing._

“It’s more than easy,” Ryan said. “It’s, like, he’s made to do this. Like he was born to do it, and all of that comes across on the camera. Jay says that’s why, you know, why Mark is going so far to make Chaz happy.” He eyed Mike up and down for a moment, not missing the look on his face. “I didn’t mean that in a bad way,” he whispered quickly. “Just saying how it is. Mark’s done a lot for him. . .he lets him live in the loft for free, and even did the whole exclusive thing for you guys.” Ryan paused for a second, skimming his fingers over his chin as he thought. “Chaz told me you’re going to take college classes for your music, so in an essence, Mark is paying for that, too. He’d pay for Chaz to go to school. . .if he ever wanted to.” There was a sharper tone in his voice before he let out a sigh. “It’s not so bad. We get to go to really cool places to shoot sometimes and of course being here in this posh house in the hills is nice. We have our own personal chef,” he added, nodding toward Brad, who was still on the other side of the room. “Mark - YRS - invests a lot into us, but I think he’s invested twice as much into Chaz. Especially now that you’re here.” 

Mike let all of that sink in as he kept an eye on Chester. It wasn’t new information, but he’d never thought about Mark doing anything to make their lives easier. In his mind, everything Mark did came at a price, one that Mike didn’t want to continue to pay any longer than he had to. “If he thinks that anything he can do will make Chester stay when his contract is up, he’s mistaken,” Mike said slowly, watching his boyfriend as he turned his ass toward the camera. “I’ll be sure of that.” 

A second later Devon, Josh and Caleb all hollered from the back of the room. Their hoots and whistles coming out in a blast, interrupting the quiet. It was enough to turn Chester’s head. “I love you, too!” he shouted at them with a chuckle before he wiggled his ass. 

“I don’t know,” Ryan said with a shake of his head. “Chaz loves the attention. It might be harder for him to give up than he’s thinking.” 

Before Mike could say anything, Brad was at his side. “Are you hungry?” the cook asked, leaning in close as he whispered. “I have sandwiches and possibly a salad and. . .Mike, are you okay? You’re looking unwell. I have bottles of water,” he offered quickly as he dug through his basket. 

“Water is good,” Mike said quickly, thinking over Ryan’s last words. _I am feeling a little queasy. But that’s nothing new here. Maybe something to eat would help._ “I don’t know, Brad, neither of those things sound good. Did I see Devon with cake?” He tried to look hopefully into the basket but Brad’s giant hair blocked his view. 

“I do,” the cook tried to say quietly, even though his excitement was evident. He moved around a few things and pulled out a little pre-wrapped chocolate cupcake. “Here you go.” He handed it over to Mike before he dug back in the basket. “I’ve got apples and maybe an orange. I know it’s in here somewhere.” 

“Thanks,” Mike said as he took the cupcake. “This will work. A little sugar is always a good thing.” Brad moved away with a nod and Mike glanced back at Ryan, about to respond to his comment about Chester being fond of attention, when he caught Mark’s form from the corner of his eye. _How long has he been watching? He totally gives me the creeps._ Mike kept a wary watch on his boss as he came further into the room, headed straight for Chester. He could feel the hairs on the back of his neck prickle in anticipation. _He better not touch him. No touching. That’s the agreement._ He took a step toward Chester and paused, watching. 

Mark stepped up just a few feet behind his husband. “He’s looking good. That sucker is adding something kinky. Have him do a little more with it.” 

Jason shook his head. “I’ve already taken twice the pictures of Chaz as Mike or Caleb. I’ve got plenty to choose from. Chaz, you’re done,” he said, dismissing him from his knees immediately before turning to Mark. He didn’t say anything else, but waited to see if Mark would make a scene or just let it go.

Mark’s brows furrowed. More and more Jason was becoming difficult, and the last thing he needed was for his husband to start disobeying him in front of the boys. “I think you could have gotten a few more good ones,” he said, stepping up a little closer, his voice low and deep. “Next time, listen.” He held their eye contact for a moment before he turned around and headed for the doorway. He glanced at his watch. It was only ten in the morning, but he was ready for a drink. “Finish up, boys!” he hollered as he went to leave, “and then it’s open bar all day long!” 

Mike was grateful to Jason for not dragging Chester’s photos out any longer than necessary, but he didn’t get the opportunity to say anything as Chester bounced over to take his clothes back and Ryan went to take his place. He watched curiously around Chester’s flailing limbs as Ryan slowly dropped his clothes for Jason, looking straight into the camera and performing a strip tease like they were alone instead of in the piano room with all the guys. “Damn, Ches, they might should cool it a bit,” Mike whispered into his boyfriend’s ear as softly as he could. 

Chester had his jeans on, but had left them undone as he turned around to see Ryan half stripping and half dancing. “Yikes,” Chester agreed as he looked toward the doorway, but Mark was already gone. “Come on,” he said, tugging on his boyfriend’s arm. “We’ll go stand guard at the door for them. You hear that!?” he hollered, his attention going to Ryan. “We’re going to go stand by the door!” 

Ryan stopped, his hands frozen right where he’d been slipping out of his briefs. His heart hitched for a moment as he looked from the empty doorway, to Jason, to Mike and Chester rounding the room. He thought to say something to his lover, but he wasn’t sure what. He’d wanted to be sexy for Jason, but for Chester to say something out loud like that, it must have been over the top. 

Jason felt a little pinch of heat in his cheeks as he watched Ryan’s stunned face. They were getting careless, and Mark had just been in the room. “C’mon, Ryan, let’s finish up.” His voice was softer than it had been ordering the other boys around. “I just need a few more. Underwear off, and, um… hands on your hips.” 

Chester leaned against the doorway, not watching as Ryan finished his shoot. Instead he kept his eyes half on Mike and half on the empty hallway. “Well, how was it for your first time?” he asked. He already knew that his boyfriend had struggled, but he was hoping maybe it wasn’t as bad as it looked. That underneath Mike’s flushed cheeks and boyish ducked eyes, he’d enjoyed himself a little bit. 

“Fine,” Mike answered, reaching to run his fingers over Chester’s bare skin. “You know how I feel about having my clothes off around people. It’s awkward. I don’t know how you do it so easily.” His eyes followed his hand down to the top of Chester’s open jeans, and he stopped, running his index finger along the blue waistband of his underwear for a second before pulling his hand back. “I’ll never be used to it, but I didn’t feel like I was going to have a full out panic attack, either, so I’m thinking it’s a win.” 

Chester pulled the sucker from his mouth as he leaned forward and wrapped his arms around Mike’s neck. “Yeah, that’s a win,” he said, kissing his cheek. “And it takes time. You’ll get used to it, just like everything else.” He shut his eyes before he ghosted his lips over Mike’s for a second, keeping their kiss short before he pulled back and let him go. “Jason will have us do group shots when everyone’s done.” He nodded back into the room, where Ryan was already done and Amir was almost naked in front of the camera already. 

Mike sighed as he watched Amir narrow his eyes and pout his lips out in his signature smirk. “I know. I shouldn’t have put all these clothes back on. But I can’t stand around the way you do.” He unwrapped his little chocolate cupcake and broke off a piece. “Want a bite? I know blow pops and cake don’t exactly mix, but Brad makes the best cake.” He held the bite up in front of Chester with what felt like the first genuine smile since they’d come downstairs. 

Chester cocked an eyebrow as he looked from Mike’s dark eyes, down to the even darker cake. “You’re absolutely right about that.” He took the half step to close the space between them as he opened his mouth and licked the bite of cake from Mike’s fingers, letting his lips linger just a second longer as he sucked on them, before pulling all the way back. “Mmmmm,” he purred, licking his lips. “You’re right. I might have to go get my own now.” 

“You better wait until after this next set of shots. You don’t want to be in the middle of it when Jason’s ready and Brad’s not in here anymore anyway. So… Toby’s still not here. What’s up with that? You think we’ll still do group photos without him?” Mike looked around the piano room as though he had missed the other boy coming in at some point. 

“I, yeah, I don’t know,” Chester said just as Devon, Josh and Caleb showed up at his side. 

“Chaz,” Devon whined, grabbing Chester’s arm, “Toby is still a no-show. Josh is next and then me and then we’re out of people.” 

“Yeah,” Josh chimed in, the two of them nodding their heads and sharing worried looks. “What do we do?” 

“I don’t know,” Chester answered honestly. “He hasn’t texted or anything?” 

All three of them shook their heads just as Jason announced that he was ready for whoever was next. 

Josh looked at Devon and then to Chester before he turned and headed for his boss. He was already unbuttoning his shirt, and hoping their friend would show up before time was really out. 

“What if something bad happened to him?” Devon asked, still clinging to Chester’s arm as he looked around him and out into the hallway. 

“I’m sure he’s fine. There must have been some kind of emergency for him to not even check in,” Mike said, trying to be reassuring even though he knew Chester would have to be unconscious and alone somewhere to not even try to let Mark know if he had to miss work. Missing work was too much drama and hassle for anyone to even attempt it, yet Toby was nowhere to be seen. 

They all tried not to think the worst as Jason finished Josh, then Devon’s pictures, and looked at the group. “Well, any of you know where Toby is? He’s not even a little bit late at this point,” Jason said, pulling his phone out of his pocket to check the time. “I don’t have any missed messages or calls.” He looked pointedly at Caleb, since he was Toby’s current scene partner and asked, “you?” 

“No,” Caleb admitted, dropping his eyes and wringing his hands together. “We haven’t heard from him either.” 

“Hopefully nothing happened, like an accident or anything,” Chester offered. If Toby was in the E.R. getting stitches in his leg, Mark would probably let him off the hook. Anything less, and they all knew Toby would be in for a tongue lashing. Or worse. 

“Well…” Jason scratched his fingers through his hair as he tried to figure out what to do next. He knew Toby would get it from Mark later, there was no need for him to add anything to that. “Let’s go ahead and get some group shots, and if Toby shows up, we’ll get him in here.” He didn’t need to finish the thought with ‘if he still has a job’. Everyone heard the unspoken words as though he’d said them anyway. 

Jason didn’t waste any time arranging everyone for group shots, coupling up his stars even though these pictures were decidedly less sexy than the individual shots he’d been taking earlier. Even though he had to wait for Mike to take off his clothes - again - the rest of the photos went quickly and he was satisfied with how it was all turning out. “I think I want to just snap some pictures for the rest of the afternoon, just ignore me. I want the kind of candid shots that really don’t look planned, not the candid shots that everyone can look at and know I told you what to do,” he called out as the boys started to gather discarded clothing from around the room. “I’m thinking out at the pool, first, so let’s have everyone out there in ten minutes,” he ordered, flicking through the last several shots on his digital camera. 

****

Ryan opened the slider door to step out to the pool area. Already most of his co-workers were in the water, roughhousing and carrying on. It was typical, especially for promo weekends. They were under orders to _act normal_ but also ham it up for Jason’s camera. 

Ryan headed for one of the lounge chairs, his towel tossed over his bare shoulder as he sat down, his sunglasses on. He crossed his legs out in front of him as he sat back. He was in his trunks, and he knew he’d get in the water soon, but he wasn’t quite ready to join the pack yet. Jason still hadn’t come out, and he was hoping to maybe get at least a few private minutes with him before he had to get in the water and splash around with the others. 

Inside the house, Jason looked up from his camera as the last of the pictures transferred to his computer. He always liked to save his pictures before he went out to the pool, on the off chance that the camera somehow ended up in the bottom of the water. He didn’t want to have to restage the whole morning due to clumsiness. Surprisingly, Mike was in the pool with Chester, and Jason blinked a few times to be sure that he was seeing things right. It looked like there was a genuine smile on Mike’s face, something that he didn’t see at YRS very often, and he didn’t want it miss the opportunity to get that on film. He double checked that he had saved everything quickly, then grabbed both his cameras to head outside.

He’d intended to go right for some video of the guys in the pool, but the sight of Ryan on one of the lounge chairs caught his eye. It wasn’t even a calculated decision to go to his lover. These days Jason found that his world narrowed to only Ryan so much of the time, and if he wasn’t careful about it, Mark might start to notice. He flicked his eyes toward the windows and decided he could take a minute with Ryan before he started working again.

“Hey,” he said, sitting on the lounge chair next to Ryan’s, his focus on the camera as though he were doing something critically important. 

From behind his sunglasses, Ryan glanced around the patio, but there was no sign of Mark, or anyone else. The rest of the guys were fully involved with their goofing off, so things seemed safe. “Hey, Jay,” he said softly as he stayed right where he was, even though he wanted to sit forward to be closer to his boyfriend. “Did our pics turn out okay?” 

“Yours always look good,” Jason answered honestly, looking up from beneath his lashes to rest his eyes on Ryan’s face before he dropped his voice low. “You were making me so hot in there while I was taking yours… I was ready to toss this camera away and just jump you.” He smiled slightly and looked back down at the empty camera.

A satisfied grin crossed Ryan’s face, and for half a second he pulled his lip in under his top teeth before he said, “I’m only half sorry about that. I wanted you to enjoy what you were shooting.” He saw Jason give him a soft look, and Ryan couldn’t resist. He sat forward, and swung his legs off the chair, so his knees were touching Jason’s. “Maybe later?” he asked quietly, knowing his lover would know exactly what he was asking. 

“I hope so,” Jason breathed out with a sigh. “Maybe we can steal some time before dinner. I’ll take the video to Mark and that usually keeps his attention for a while. I just have to shoot enough of it to keep him busy.” He nudged Ryan’s knees with his own. “You ready to get in the water?”

“I’d rather just sit here with you,” Ryan said, before he looked away and over toward the water. He knew saying things like that didn’t help. “But yeah, I’ll get in and give Mark something he wants to watch. Maybe he’ll press rewind a few times.” He looked back at Jason and pulled his sunglasses off, his blue eyes shining. “I’d love to kiss you right now,” he said before he could stop himself. He glanced over at the door and windows, but with no sign of Mark, he dared to run a finger around the side of Jason’s knee, knowing no one could see it. 

“Ry,” Jason whispered, his voice needy even to him. “I’d love to let you.” He watched Ryan’s finger as it dropped away and he glanced up at him again. “I’d love to leave all this behind and take you away from here, but we’ve got work to do right now. Don’t make it harder than it already is.” He turned and looked out over the pool and sighed as he moved to stand up. “Come on, the faster we get this done the closer we are to dinner, and the closer we are to stealing some time together.” 

Ryan nodded as he stood up. He knew Jason was right, even though he hated it. He dropped his towel on the lounge chair, and without another look or word to his boyfriend, he headed to the water. _Time to work. Time to look good for the camera. Time to make it interesting for Mark. . .for the viewers. Wow, Mike’s in the water. With a t-shirt on._

Ryan smiled as he stepped over to the side of the pool where Mike and Chester were holding onto the edge, playfully splashing each other and giggling. “Hey, Mike, you got my vote for winning the wet t-shirt contest later.” 

Chester looked up, catching the grin on Ryan’s face. “Of course he’d win,” Chester was quick to say as he let go of the side and wrapped his arm around Mike’s neck to keep himself afloat instead. “Just look at these nipples. I love them,” he said, as he poked at one of Mike’s dark nipples showing through his wet, white t-shirt. 

“Chesss,” Mike hissed as he felt his cheeks turn pink, reaching to grab his boyfriend’s offending hand. “You’re making the guys look. Stop it.” He pulled on Chester’s hand, bringing it around his own body and shielding his front from sight. He was making an effort to have fun in the water but it wasn’t going to last if everyone was watching him. The point was for the guys to all have a good time, not gang up on him for wearing a shirt into the water. 

“Come on, Sexy Boy, no one cares,” Chester stated as he glanced over at the others, but he had to admit that for whatever reason, Ryan’s commit had caught their attention. He looked back at his boyfriend. “Take it off,” he suggested, tugging at the t-shirt under the water. “Then they won’t be interested. The rest of us aren’t wearing one.” Chester let go of Mike’s neck, and hung back onto the side of the pool to give him space. 

“I agree with Chaz,” Ryan said as he sat down, letting his feet and legs dangle in the water right next to them. “No need to be bashful. You _are_ a porn star now, you know.” 

_Don’t remind me,_ Mike thought as he glanced between Ryan and Chester. “Fine, I’ll take it off, but only if both of you swear not to make a big deal out of it. No cat calling and all that, alright?” He fixed them both with a serious stare as he reached for the hem of the t-shirt. 

“We promise,” Chester agreed for both he and Ryan. “You want some help?” He didn’t wait for Mike to answer. He let go of the side of the pool and wrapped his legs around Mike’s waist under the water to steady himself as he reached for the shirt. Mike didn’t resist, and a second later, Chester pulled it up and over his head, before he tossed it over toward one of the chairs. “There,” he whispered, one hand going to Mike’s hidden side, and the other to his shoulder before he tilted his head and grabbed a wet kiss. 

“Yeaaahhhh!” Devon hooted from the other side of the pool. 

“Get him, Chaz!” Josh was next to say, both of them on their way across the water, with Caleb tagging along behind them. 

Mike pulled away from the kiss, his whole body feeling as though it were blushing under the watchful eyes of their coworkers. “I swear, babe, you know how to get everyone all riled up around here, don’t you?” 

Chester quickly fanned one wet hand over his mohawk. “It’s a talent of mine,” he said cheekily before he dropped his hand to Mike’s cheek, and then his jawline to bring his lips in closer. He shut his eyes, ignoring all the noise and splashing. He was enjoying kissing Mike in the pool - something they’d yet to do together - and he didn’t mind the audience. He knew it wouldn’t take long for the others to get distracted and move onto something else. 

From the video camera screen, Jason watched Mike and Chester for a few moments before zooming out to include what the other boys were doing in the pool. That didn’t last long before he was zeroed in on Mark’s stars again, knowing that he was capturing real intimate moments between them and not just a charade put on for the camera. As he usually did when filming Chester, now that Mike was signed on, he felt a twinge of guilt for exploiting their relationship the way YRS clearly was, but the visual was too good to pass up. The only thing that took his attention from the couple kissing in the water was when Ryan slid in behind them and swam to the opposite end of the pool. Jason found the camera following Ryan even though he wasn’t doing anything particularly interesting at the moment. 

“Hey!” he called out, “you guys need to get a game going or something. Give me something else to film besides Chaz and Mike making out over here! This is supposed to be a group activity!” 

“I’ll get the balls!” Devon offered, as he swam toward the ladder, and Josh followed him. They quickly got out of the water and headed for the plastic bin by the lounge chairs, which housed all the pool toys - balls and hoops and floats. They rummaged through the stockpile before they pulled out the two soccer ball sized pool floats and tossed them both in the water before they jumped back in, splashing everyone. 

Chester let go of Mike and headed across the pool to join the others. It was time to have _fun_ for the camera, to make it look like they were having the time of their lives, tossing balls back and forth. “Give me that,” he said, as he got up next to Ryan, tugging on the red ball, as Ryan tugged back. 

“Forget it, Chazzy, you’ll have to wrestle it from me!” Ryan laughed, knowing he could easily manhandle Chester if he wanted to.

“Alright, you asked for it,” Chester teased as he pulled on it again, the two of them splashing around as they laughed and grappled over the pool float. This end of the pool was a foot or so shallower than the other, so they could stand instead of trying to keep afloat. Chester shoved his body into Ryan’s, trying to knock off his balance. 

“You’ll never push me over!” Ryan cackled as he pushed back, holding the ball with one hand, his other arm wrapping around Chester’s side as they moved together. “You know I can out muscle you,” he said, his voice dropping to something more intimate, even with everyone around them yelling and cheering them on. 

“That’s enough of that,” Mike said firmly as he went to pull Chester back from Ryan’s grip. “Let go of him,” he ordered, looking Ryan square in the eyes. “Come on, Ches, this is ridiculous.” 

All the cheering stopped, like a blanket of silence was suddenly dropped over the pool. “Mike, what are you doing?” Chester asked as he jerked away from his boyfriend. “We’re just playing,” he stated as he wiped one hand over his face to get rid of the water dripping from his hair and into his eyes. 

Even though everyone was staring at him, Mike didn’t back down. “I don’t like it. I don’t want you to get hurt.” He was annoyed that Chester had moved away from him and he flashed a glare at Ryan. “Come on, you’re making it a bigger deal than it has to be.” 

Chester’s mouth fell open. “I’m making a bigger deal than it has to be?” he asked, disgust shining through as he pointed at his chest. “Mike, you have to calm down. Ry would never hurt me, and I’m a grown fuckin’ man,” he said, his eyes narrowing a bit. Mike being possessive at home was one thing or even in front of Mark, but their boss was nowhere to be seen. They were working, and for once they were having fun at it, or they were _supposed_ to be having fun. 

“Come on, Mike,” Ryan said next as he reached over and slid his hand around Chester’s wet naked shoulders, “I would never hurt him. We were just goofing around, you know, for the camera.” 

The sight of Ryan’s arm over Chester’s shoulder infuriated Mike, but he was done making a scene. He blew out a frustrated breath and turned his best pleading eyes to his boyfriend. “Ches,” he said quietly, “just come over here for a second,” he asked, hoping to get him away from Ryan.

Chester recognized the tone in his boyfriend’s voice. He was upset, and the last thing Chester wanted was anymore attention on what was happening. They were supposed to be working, not sorting through personal problems. “Alright, there’s nothing to see here,” he announced as he pulled away from Ryan and splashed some water toward the others. “Go on and get your own lives,” he teased, sticking his tongue out for good measure. “And that ball _will_ be mine later,” he made sure to add as he winked at Ryan before he turned back to Mike, and followed him toward the edge of the pool, away from the others. 

Before Chester could say anything, Mike put a hand out to silence him. “I know. I’m probably overreacting. I’m sorry. I don’t want you to get hurt. It’s this place. I don’t trust anyone here.” He glanced over at the group that Jason was filming, everyone engrossed in their own thing now, but he still felt as though he was being watched. 

Chester shook his head. “Why would you think I’d get hurt? We’re in the pool playing around,” he stressed again. He pressed his fingers to his forehead. “Ryan would never hurt me, Mike. None of them would. We’re all friends. It’s all in good fun. . .and work,” he said, before he twisted around and pointed at Jason. “It’s all for the website, like I told you. We’re supposed to be having a good time. If we’re not having a good time, who’s going to watch it? No one.” 

Mike sighed and hung his head, staring at the rippling surface of the water. “I know,” he said softly. “I just want to keep you for myself. Being here was supposed to make things easier, and in some ways it has, but… I just… I don’t know how to explain it. I’m sorry.” He sighed again and looked over toward the group. “I’ll control myself. Just. Will you try to stay close to me? I hate being around the others like this, and having you next to me makes me less anxious. For so many reasons.” He reached to run his fingers down Chester’s wet arm, stopping to link his fingers around his wrist. “Please?” 

“That’s not how this works,” Chester told him gently before he leaned in and nuzzled his lips to Mike’s ear, the taste of pool water keeping him from turning it into a kiss. “I can try, but you’ve really got to let it go, Mike.” He pulled back and offered his lover a soft smile. “It’s acting, okay? Just remember that. When we do scenes, we act like it’s the best sex ever, right? Well, on promo days, we act like this is the best time of our lives and that those,” he said, pointing to the others, “are our best friends ever. Period. So don’t freak out, okay?” 

“I’ll try,” Mike promised, following behind as Chester swam back to the group. He felt the camera on him as Jason turned their way, and tried to ignore it as he offered Ryan a quick apology.

Jason kept one eye on the camera and the other on Mike and Ryan. If Mike didn’t calm down he was going to have to pull him aside and reprimand him, and he wasn’t feeling it today. He wanted everything to go smoothly so they could stop filming and he and Ryan could sneak away. After a few exchanges, Jason was relieved to see Mike smile back at Ryan, and things seemed to be okay as Mike swam back over to Chester. He caught Ryan looking his direction, and swung the camera back on him just as Ryan threw him a wink and blew a kiss at what they both knew was really Jason, but would come across as being directed toward the camera. 

Standing just inside the house and looking out the patio doors, Mark watched. He hadn’t missed the heated exchange between Mike and Chester, and he knew that was going to be a problem. _More of a problem than it already is. That kid is more trouble than he’s worth. Chaz will get tired of it, eventually. Sooner than later if he keeps that kind of shit up._ He pulled his attention back to his husband as he opened the screen door and stepped out, being careful to hang back and not disturb the playful atmosphere. Viewers loved to see the boys being themselves, and they especially loved to see them all in the water, acting like twelve year olds while they showed off their tight asses and lean muscles. 

He took a step closer. “Hmmm,” he hummed to himself as he watched Jason follow the boys around the pool with his camera. Mark stroked his fingers over his chin, feeling the stubble of his facial hair as he watched Jason turn the camera on Ryan again. 

Late to the party as usual, Amir strolled to the side of the pool with a glass of lemonade in his hand and no cares about not following directions. He watched the rest of his coworkers in the water for a minute and rolled his eyes. It was so much effort to put on a smile and pretend to have fun with them when he had no emotional attachment to any of them and just wanted to pull in his paycheck. He glanced sideways at Mark, and decided that since he looked annoyed, he’d probably better get his ass in the water.

He set his glass down on a small table and dropped his towel, taking a few steps toward the pool and psyching himself up to _have fun_ before Mark put his hand out and stopped him. “Yeah?” he asked, annoyed arrogance in his voice. He was certain he was about to get his ass chewed for being late, which was typical of the boss. 

“You’re an honest guy,” Mark said, his fingers latched onto Amir’s bare shoulder as he stood just behind him. “You’d tell me the truth if I asked you something, wouldn’t you?” 

“Sure,” Amir shrugged, thinking that there was a long list of things he’d never be willing to discuss with Mark. 

“I see a lot more than what you might think, and it seems like Jason is shooting a lot more footage of Ryan than is necessary. Do you have any idea of why that might be?” 

“Because Ryan’s fucking hot?” Amir said, shrugging his shoulders again, trying to shake Mark off. “Because you fucked Ryan over when you took Chaz away from him, and Jason’s trying to give him some more screen time? I dunno, I haven’t been out here.” He stepped away from Mark and looked over to see Ryan wiggling his fingers at the camera and smiling. He’d have to find a way to tell Ryan to knock it off without alerting Mark that’s what he was doing. _They’re so fucking stupid,_ he thought angrily as he got into the water and plastered a fake smile on his face. _If they get caught, this whole place will go down in flames. I’ve gotta talk some sense into Ryan before he ruins this for all of us._

****

The welcome relief of Sunday night had finally come, and Mike stepped out of the shower back at the loft, the air thick with steam and the scent of peaches. He could hear Chester rattling around in the kitchen and his stomach rumbled in anticipation. _I know he doesn’t believe it, but his cooking is so much better than Brad’s. I can’t believe Brad tried to make sushi this weekend. What the fuck was that?_

He wiped the mirror with his towel and pulled his pajamas on, running a comb through his hair before he opened the door. _I need to go see Anna, my hair is looking like it needs a touch up._ The rush of cooler air from the loft hit him in the face as he flipped the light switch and stepped out of the bathroom toward the kitchen. Mike leaned over the bar for a second, looking at Chester’s ass as he bent to reach something in a lower cabinet. “Hey, babe, whatcha making?”

“Lasagna,” Chester answered as he turned around, his favorite casserole dish in hand. “Just had to find this. I’ll throw it all together, and we’ll be eating in an hour,” he promised with a wink. He already had his fillings and noodles ready to go, now he just needed to layer everything together and get it in the hot oven. He sat his dish on the counter before he headed for the refrigerator. “I’m so glad to be home,” he stated for what was probably the fifth time since they’d walked through the doors of their loft apartment. “Promo weekend or not, I’m exhausted.” He grabbed the bag of shredded cheese before he headed back to the counter. 

Mike watched, keeping his distance as Chester moved around the kitchen with purpose. “Me, too. I’m glad it’s over. I never thought I’d say this, but I think I prefer shooting weekends over promo weekends. When we’re shooting it’s just us. I mean, yeah, there’s a camera, but there’s no immediate audience. No sharing.” He picked at his fingernails as he talked, hoping there wouldn’t be another promo weekend for a long, long time. He didn’t want to bring it up yet, but he was also glad to be home where Chester didn’t constantly have a drink in his hand. The whole weekend Brad had somehow managed to replace each glass before Chester could put the empty one down, and Mike hadn’t been able to say anything about it after his blow up in the pool. He’d tread lightly the rest of their time at YRS, concerned about Chester’s ongoing state of inebriation but unable to do anything about it. 

“You’re so funny,” Chester chuckled as he spread steaming meat sauce all over the bottom of his casserole dish. “You’d rather fuck in front of the camera instead of just hanging out with everyone.” He looked up, just in time to see the disapproving look on Mike’s face. “I’m just saying it’s ironic. For you.” 

“Is that really how you think of it? Just fucking?” Mike asked, feeling stupid as he said the words aloud. “I mean, I get it when you were working with other people, but it’s me. I don’t know. I can’t think of it that way. It might be in front of the camera, but it’s still you. And I love you. And no matter what they ask us to do, I try to be respectful of you.” He shook his head. “I’m not being critical, I’m sorry. It just sounded weird to me.” 

Chester watched as his lover looked away from him before he went back to building his layers of noodles, sauce and cheese. “It’s still work, Mike. I love you, too, you know that. But I can separate it. What we do in front of Mark and Jason and the cameras isn’t making love. It’s fucking. And I don’t mean any disrespect to you by that, it just is,” he said with a shrug. He hated where this was headed. Any conversation with Mike that took a turn down the road of how they weren’t on the same page with their outlooks or feelings, usually ended badly. 

Chester rolled his tongue over his lip ring for a moment as he figured changing the subject before this could go any further would probably save them both from unnecessary drama. “I still can’t believe Toby never showed up. I hope he’s okay,” he offered, hoping Mike would cross over into the new topic with him. 

With one last look at his boyfriend, Mike crossed the room to sit behind his keyboard. “Can’t say I blame him, but yeah, I hope he’s okay. He’s actually a pretty cool guy.” He opened his folder and stared down at his music for a minute, but he didn’t really feel like practicing anything that he needed to work on. Instead he closed his eyes and started the slow movement of a concerto he’d learned a long time ago as a kid, letting his fingers move automatically without thinking as he tried to clear his head. It always felt like there was drama and issues to work through on Sunday nights before it was just him and Chester again, without all the trappings of work around them. 

Chester flipped his attention between the lasagna and Mike, who had clearly left the conversation. _He’s pouting. He uses that keyboard to ignore. Fine. He needs to chill out anyway._ He finished putting their dinner together before he popped it into the oven and set the timer. He found himself humming along to the slow melody Mike was sending through the loft as he took a beer from the fridge and debated bread options. _Garlic or garlic and cheese? Or maybe no garlic? Maybe onion and tomato bread instead. That could be good._ He was about to walk across the room to see if Mike had a preference, just before his phone rang. 

He pulled it from the pocket of his pajama pants, and his eyes rolled the moment he saw Jason’s name flash across the screen. “Shit,” he hissed under his breath just as Mike stopped playing. Chester tapped the screen to answer the call with a, “Hello?” 

Jason had his best professional voice on as he said, “Chester. You have a minute? I’m sorry to bother you at home, but this can’t wait.”

Chester let out a sigh as he set his beer on the table, and scrubbed his fingers through his still slightly damp mohawk. “Sure. What’s up?” 

“I need you and Mike to go get your monthly STD tests early. Toby’s fired. He came in after everyone left with his paperwork. He’s got herpes.” Jason didn’t even stumble over the words he was delivering so matter of factly, as though he were discussing the weather. “Production is off indefinitely until everyone’s results come back clean. Do you have any questions?” 

“Oh my God,” Chester mumbled, his mouth hanging open as he pulled out one of the kitchen chairs and sat down. “Is he okay? I mean, fuck. How, how could that happen?” 

Mike looked over to see Chester’s pale face and got up immediately from the piano bench to sit in his chair next to Chester, reaching out to take his hand. Whatever news he was getting from the phone call he’d taken, it wasn’t good.

“We don’t ask questions, Chester, you know that. It’s immediate termination, no questions asked. I need you both to get in first thing tomorrow and take care of this. Do you understand? And can you tell Mike or do you need me to make a formal phone call?” Jason waited, listening to Chester’s breaths over the line. 

“No, no, I can tell him,” Chester answered with a hard swallow as he glanced Mike’s way. “And we’ll go tomorrow. First thing. I’ll let you know when we’re done.” 

“I’m sorry, Chaz, I know that’s not news you wanted to hear,” Jason said in a softer tone before he brought his lips close to the phone and said, “we _all_ have to go. Just… keep me updated, okay?”

Chester nodded without thought. “Will do,” he assured his boss. “I’ll talk to you tomorrow.” He said a quick goodbye before he dropped his phone to the table. He could see Toby’s smiling face in his mind, and he shut his eyes, trying to send it away. STD scares were a real thing in the business - in life - but YRS was so good about being safe. In three years, this was the first time someone’s test had come up positive. 

“Ches? What’s wrong?” Mike asked as soon as his boyfriend ended the call. “You look like you’re about to be sick.” He wasn’t entirely sure he wanted to know the answer, but he squeezed Chester’s hand tightly as he encouraged, “you can tell me.” 

“That was Jason,” Chester said, letting out a shiver of a breath. “Toby’s fired. He. . .he failed his STD test.” He looked over to see Mike’s dark eyes pop open wide. “He has herpes.” 

“What? Oh my God!” Mike exclaimed as he sat back in his chair. “How the fuck did that happen?”

Chester shrugged as he stared at the woodgrain of the table. “I don’t know. Jason said he didn’t ask. . .that’s YRS policy. You don’t ask, but coming up positive for anything means your ass is out the door.” 

“I don’t… I can’t…” Mike let out a long breath, trying to collect himself as he ran his free hand through his hair. “I mean, that sucks for him, but it doesn’t have anything to do with us. Thankfully. I can’t imagine how Caleb is feeling right now. That’s awful. And so irresponsible of Toby.” His eyebrows drew down into an intense frown as he looked at Chester. “I really feel bad for Caleb.” 

Chester nodded before he pulled his elbow up on the table and ran his hand over his face for a moment. “Me too,” he agreed first, even as he cursed himself. Telling Mike what was coming next wasn’t going to go well, but he knew it needed to be done. He took a deep breath before he explained, “but, it’s not just Caleb. We all need to go get tested now to make sure we’re clean. Jason said production is on hold till everyone is cleared.” He dropped his eyes as he motioned toward his cell phone lying on the table. “I told him we’d go first thing in the morning.” 

“Us? Why?” Mike’s expression changed instantly from concern for Caleb to utter surprise. “We’re exclusive. I’ve never even been with anyone else. _Everyone_ has to go?” A sudden thought occurred to him and he narrowed his eyes as he looked at Chester carefully avoiding eye contact. “Everyone, Ches, or, or just people that could have been exposed? Or is that really everyone? I’m confused. I’ve only been with you. Have you been with Toby? I thought Ryan was your regular partner before I came on.” 

“Everyone is getting tested,” Chester answered as he dared to meet Mike’s eyes for just a second. “I’m sorry, Mike. It’s not fair to you, I know. But that’s how it is. I’ve. . .I’ve been with him. Ryan was my partner, but we’ve all. . .” he cut his words short as he rolled his hand through the air. “Ryan and I were doing a series, but there was other stuff. I’m sorry,” he said again, shaking his head. “This kind of stuff, you never expect it.” 

Mike pulled his hand away, turning to look out the window. “I didn’t realize. We never talked about it, I just _assumed_ that what you had going on there was just with Ryan. I didn’t realize Mark just shopped you around to everyone.” He drew in a shaky breath and closed his eyes to fight back the frustrated tears he could feel threatening. “This is so fucked up, Chester. Everything about this is fucked up, and just when I think I’m kind of handling things okay, when I feel like I’ve finally got my feet under me on solid ground, something like this gets thrown at me. I fucking hate this!”

He stood up, the chair scraping the floor as he pushed it away and brought his hand up to scrub at his eyes. “You’ve been tested since I’ve been there, and you haven’t been with anyone but me since then - right?” Suddenly he wasn’t so sure that Mark had been keeping his word about their exclusivity, and even though he knew there hadn’t been any time that Chester had been out of his sight, he couldn’t help but spit out the nasty accusation. 

Chester looked up, and he inwardly flinched at the sight of Mike’s scowl. “Of course not,” he defended right away. “Mike, you know I haven’t. But, but tests don’t always, I mean, sometimes things don’t show up right away.” He dropped his head. He knew Mike had every right to be upset, even though he found it a little hard to believe that his boyfriend would actually think that Ryan was the only person he’d ever been with at YRS. 

“I can’t believe this,” Mike said, his voice softer this time as he looked at his boyfriend. “I don’t even know what to say to you right now.” He was conflicted, part of him so angry that he wanted to storm out of the loft and just be alone, the other part of him so sick with worry that everything could be falling apart that he felt paralyzed. “You should have told me. You should have been clearer about how things were. God, I can’t believe you, the way we were when we first started dating, and you knew! You knew I hadn’t been with anyone and you still didn’t tell me right away. Do you know how risky it is to have more than one partner? There’s no way you knew for sure you were clean.” His hands were shaking as he thought through all of the implications of the information he’d just received. “And it could be months before we know for sure, right? That’s what you’re saying? Even though it’s just me and you now, we still may not know for sure after tomorrow?”

Chester kept his head down. “I don’t know,” he answered honestly, his chest shaking. “I’m sorry, Mike. I can’t change it now.” He looked up, hoping to see some sort of recognition in his lover’s eyes, but it wasn’t there, and Chester shrank back into his chair. “We can ask when we go tomorrow. They know all that stuff better than I do.” 

“I just… I need a minute,” Mike finally said, grabbing his cell phone from the bar and shoving it in his pocket. “I’m just going to go outside and walk around the building, clear my head for a second. I’ll be back in a half hour or less,” he promised, trying to ignore the stunned look on Chester’s face as he walked toward the door to their loft. 

“Well. . .okay,” Chester mumbled, as he watched his boyfriend walk away from him. He shut his eyes and listened as the door opened, and then slammed shut. “Fuck,” Chester swore out loud as he covered his face. _He hates me. Or worse. . .he thinks I’m dirty. Maybe I am._

Chester waited at the table, his head down and his eyes closed. He could smell the lasagna in the oven as he looked at his phone to check the time again. Mike had already been gone ten minutes, and that felt like a lifetime. _I don’t know what else to say to him. I can’t make this better. And how could he not know I was with all the guys? It’s like he doesn’t know how porn works._ His mind paused for a moment as he sat up and looked out the windows at the ever darkening sky. _He’ll come back. He’ll come back and we’ll talk about it and we’ll eat and tomorrow will make this better. I hope._

He stood up and walked into the kitchen, determined to finish dinner and to make the best bread ever to go with it. Thoughts of Mike coming back and packing up his stuff and leaving crossed his mind with every minute his boyfriend was gone, but Chester kept them at bay. Worrying over that wasn’t going to help, and he knew it. 

_I just have to wait till he gets back. Dinner will be ready and everything will be okay. It has to be._

****  
TBC


	31. Reality Check

Mike tilted his chin up to look at the sky when he finally stopped pacing circles around the apartment building. _I wish I could see the stars. There’s so many lights in the city. Nothing feels real. The sky isn’t real. This day isn’t real. None of this is happening to me._ He squinted at the darkness overhead, trying to make out a speck of light to call a star, then gave up, dropping his head to stare at the sidewalk. _Why did I have to fall in love with him?_

He could feel the tears ready to start again, when he’d just gotten himself together. A half hour he’d spent outside until he’d cried out all of his anger and fear, and just when he was feeling ready to face Chester again, thoughts of how unfair everything was, and how much he really, truly loved his boyfriend, were threatening to keep him outside a little while longer. _I’ve got to get myself together. I promised him less than a half hour, he’s probably worried. He should be! I didn’t ask for any of this._

Shoving a hand through his hair, Mike thought about the last time he’d left Chester crying. When he’d first found out that Chester worked in porn. _I should have left then. But my gut told me it would be okay. I always follow my gut._

But what had gut feelings gotten him? He was staring down the barrel of a gun now - an incurable STD, when he’d only been with one person. Only trusted one person, had done everything right when it came to sex and love. Of course, he’d also left his job and somehow managed to be coerced into working in porn himself, and for what? For love? Mike kicked the toe of his shoe against the sidewalk and folded his lips together, pulling his bottom lip into his mouth to worry it with his teeth. _How much longer can we both just rely on love before something really awful happens. There’s so much time left on our contracts, and so many things could go wrong. I want out already. I don’t want to go back._

The seasick feeling of fear returned swiftly, as soon as Mike thought about not going back. _I can’t protect Chester if I’m not there. And I love him. I do. I can’t let him go back there alone, not after all of this. If our tests turn up clean, I have to be there to keep it that way… and if they don’t..._ Mike’s chin lifted defiantly. _If they don’t, then there’s nothing we can do about it. But we’ll be in it together. Forever. Is that what I want?_

He pushed off the wall and started another circle around the building. There had been talk about the future, mostly abstract ideas of what it might look like to leave YRS together, and once they’d even talked briefly about marriage. _I’m not even twenty yet! That’s too young to be discussing marriage, and what if… what if Chester gets tired of me? Of being with only me? He’s been with so many other guys…_ Mike shook his head, an unwanted vision of his YRS co-workers floating around in his head. _Am I just that dumb? To not realize they all worked together? I really never thought… I don’t want to think about that. I can’t think about that. But what if, what if he decides he’s bored of me? Then what? No job, no degree, no place to live, and herpes. Maybe Dave was right. Maybe I didn’t think this through._

Mike froze on the sidewalk as his friend’s concerns echoed through his head. _He doesn’t even know the half of it. And Anna, what would she say? I wish I had someone to talk to. But I don’t. I only have Chester. By choice. He’s my choice. And he’s upstairs, alone, when we should be talking this through together. I’m the worst boyfriend ever._

With a sense of purpose, Mike turned back to the front of the building, ready to go back to Chester. _Neither one of us should be worrying about this alone. And if I’m being fair about it all, this isn’t Chester’s fault. I knew before we ever had sex what he did for a living, and I chose him anyway. Punishing him for that now isn’t fair._ He waited impatiently for the elevator, shifting his weight back and forth on his feet. 

Inside the loft, the lasagna was already out of the oven. Chester had fixed two plates, loading them both with large pieces of the gooey, steamy pasta and two slices each of the onion, cheese, and herb bread he’d managed to put together. Now those plates were sitting on the bar, but Mike still wasn’t back. 

Chester sat at the table, his head resting on his folded arms as he blankly stared out the windows at the evening sky. His phone was nearby, but he’d stopped checking the time fifteen minutes ago. He shut his eyes and tried to think of anything other than the worst case scenario. He didn’t feel sick, and neither him nor Mike had shown any symptoms of being infected, but he also knew that didn’t mean anything. _If he’s got it, it’s because of me. It would be my fault. I’m the only person in the world he’s had sex with, and if I gave him something. . ._ Chester wiped his eyes and pushed that line of thinking away. Instead he decided to try and be positive. He’d been getting tested for STDs for years now, and he always came up clean, and he was sure he’d come up clean tomorrow, too. _And Sexy Boy will be clean with me, and after this test we should really be safe, since it’s just us now._

He rolled his lips together, feeling the metal of his piercing, just as his phone rang. He jumped in his seat before he grabbed it, knowing it would be Mike, but it was Ryan’s name flashing across the screen instead. Chester hesitated. He looked from his phone to the front door and back again. He knew if Mike walked in and was still upset, seeing him on the phone with Ryan wasn’t going to help. Then again, Ryan was Toby’s friend, too. 

He tapped the accept button and answered. 

“Chaz,” Ryan said immediately, “did Jay already call you?” 

Chester sat back in his chair as he let out a long sigh. “Yeah.” 

“This is so crazy. Jay said this is the first STD scare they’ve had for four years.” 

Chester nodded. “It’s definitely the first one since we’ve been there.” 

“He said Caleb was in tears.” 

Chester looked up from the table and across the loft at the sofa and television, and the giant painting Mike had done for him so long ago. He could see Caleb in his mind. He was the youngest out of all of them, and the newest, not counting Mike. “I’m sure,” he responded as he sat forward and put his elbows on the table. “It’s still hard to believe. Do you think. . .do you think it’s because Toby was out there not using protection?” 

“Obviously,” Ryan answered. “Chaz, of course that’s what happened. He got careless or drunk,” he amended. “That happens. You have too much to drink and if you’re with someone you know or trust. . .or if you’re really horny and ready to go, it could happen.”

That was true, and Chester felt it in the depths of his soul. He shut his eyes as his memory traced back over the last few years, and all the times he’d come so close to making that same mistake. 

“What did Mike say?” Ryan asked after the line stayed silent for a minute. 

Chester’s jaw was shaking. “He, he didn’t take it well. He, he left.” 

“Left? Left like how?” 

Chester could hear the concern - or maybe it was shock - in Ryan’s voice as he pressed his free hand to the side of his head. “He said he needed to get some air and think, but that’s been over an hour ago. He was mad at me, Ry.” 

“Mad? Why would he be mad at you?” 

“Because this is my fault.” 

“What’s your fault? Chaz, this thing with Toby has nothing to do with you.” 

Chester waited. He cupped his hand over his mouth for a moment as he pushed back the stinging in his eyes. “It’s my fault to him. Mike’s never been with anyone else. Just me. He didn’t. . .he didn’t realize that I was with other people at work, not just with you. I told him I’d been with Toby. . .with everyone, and he flipped.” 

“It’s like he knows nothing about porn,” Ryan mumbled before he went on. “Chaz, that’s not your fault. All of that - being with Toby - that was for work. Come on, Mike’s gotta realize that. You and him are exclusive at work, but he knows that you weren’t before. Jesus, Chazzy, you’ve been doing this for years.” 

“I know it seems obvious to us, but he really didn’t know. I think, I think he hates me now, Ry. He was looking at me and talking to me like I’m. . .like I’m bad.” Chester dropped his head. He didn’t want to talk about this anymore. He just wanted Mike to come home so they could discuss everything and get it worked out between them. He wanted them to go upstairs and snuggle in bed and be okay. 

“He’s probably just scared, Chester,” Ryan offered. “And, you know, if it’s more than that, if he comes back and bitches you out for this then fuck him. Right? You don’t deserve that. None of us do. It’s not our fault. And you know, the way he treats you sometimes is jacked anyway, so maybe this is just the out you need.” 

Chester sat up, his flushed face suddenly feeling cold. “What?” He took a hard swallow as his mind tumbled over Ryan’s words, just as he heard the front door. He spun around in his seat in time to see Mike coming in. “I gotta go,” he told Ryan quickly. “Mike just walked in. We’re getting tested in the morning, I’ll let you know how it goes.” 

“Hey,” Mike called tentatively across the living space. “Sorry I was gone longer than I thought. Who was that?” he asked, gesturing at the cell phone Chester had just put down on the table.

Chester looked from his boyfriend to his phone and back before he admitted, “That was Ryan. He just wanted to know if we’d heard about Toby.” 

“He’s always got bad timing,” Mike said, his voice hitting a frustrated tone. “I don’t want to think about anyone at work right now, I don’t want to talk about any of them. I just want to talk to you. About us. And what all of this could potentially mean. I don’t want to _think_ about Ryan right now.”

Chester ran his hand over the back of his neck as he watched Mike come a few steps closer to him. “Okay,” he agreed easily. He could already see that his lover had been crying, and his stomach twisted with guilt. “I won’t bring him up,” he promised. 

Mike’s eyes ran over the plates of food on the bar, and despite his mood, he felt his stomach rumble in anticipation. “Why don’t we eat first. Hopefully I didn’t make it get cold. I just… I just needed some space for a minute, to think, and try to make sense of everything…” Even though he’d suggested eating first, Mike couldn’t stop rambling out his thoughts. “It’s a lot to take in all at once. Knowing that we’re at risk, knowing that you’ve worked with everyone in the house, it’s just a lot, babe. I still don’t know how I feel. It’s not fair. None of this is fair.” He looked around the loft, at the space that they shared but that wasn’t really theirs, and then back at Chester. “I don’t want it to be like this,” he said softly. “ _I_ don’t want to be like this. I don’t want to belittle you and I don’t want to live in fear of Mark or disease or anything. This whole situation just fucking sucks.” 

“I know,” Chester whispered. He wanted to get up and take Mike in his arms, but he wasn’t sure how that would go. His boyfriend had already left once, and Chester didn’t want to do anything to tip the fragile scales of Mike’s emotions. “You know I wish it was different, too. And with what’s going on now, I’m, I’m sorry, Mike. But I’m hoping tomorrow will be okay, and we’re okay, right?” 

Looking down at his shoes, Mike drew in a ragged breath. “I think so.” He reached up to mess with one of his earrings, flipping it back and forth before he cupped his hand around the back of his neck and looked up. “I _want_ us to be okay. I want this to just be over. I want to go tomorrow and have everything be fine. But I don’t want to have to go at all. I just want us to be okay,” he said again. 

Chester nodded, even though he wasn’t quite sure he understood. “You mean, okay like not sick or okay like. . .like you and me being together okay?” he asked, bringing his arms in around himself. His skin felt cold, just like his insides. 

“Both,” Mike answered simply. “I want the tests to be clean and I want us to be okay. Things feel so confusing when we’re away from here. I wish we could stay here and away from YRS and just in our safe space together. I just want it to be me and you.” He took a step toward Chester and then another, and before his boyfriend had a chance to say anything, Mike had pulled him into his arms. “I don’t want to share you. I don’t want to think about you ever being with anyone else. I want to erase all of those people in your past.” Mike felt Chester’s cheek next to his and closed his eyes.

Chester had wrapped his arms around Mike’s middle, pulling him as close as he could get him. He was relieved that Mike wasn’t stomping upstairs and packing bags to leave, but it was clear that things weren’t okay either. “I can’t change the past, Mike. It is what it is, and even though I’m not proud of all of it, it’s still mine.” He pulled back, his gaze briefly meeting with his lover’s bloodshot eyes. “That’s part of who I am, and if you can’t accept that, then I don’t know.” He stopped as his mind went into panic mode. He didn’t want to sound like he was giving Mike an ultimatum, but it seemed like they were constantly having this same discussion. “I love you,” he said, reaching to take Mike’s hand. “But I come with a lot of people in my past, people I still have to be around sometimes, like at work. It doesn’t mean I don’t love you.” 

“I love you, too,” Mike said without hesitation. “That’s not in question, Ches. But you know how hard it is on me to be there, and when I think I’m starting to be okay, something like this comes up and I feel like I’m all the way back at square one. I know it might not seem like it, but I’ve tried so hard to push all of this to the back of my mind and not let it bother me. Maybe that’s the problem. Maybe I need to just confront it and deal with it instead of trying to ignore it. Maybe I should have asked more questions along the way instead of trying to pretend your job and YRS didn’t exist.”

Chester felt a lump in his throat as he moved backwards and sat down at the table. “Confront what? You mean Mark? About, about what?” 

Mike shook his head. “No, not an actual confrontation. I’m not that insane, I’ve seen how he is, how Mark was after our first shoot and all… I mean, I need to stop acting like everything is fine while we’re home and YRS isn’t part of who we are. I need to stop pretending it’s not there. I need to confront my issues with it instead of hoping it will just disappear. It’s not going to disappear. We’re stuck there and I need to stop blaming you for that. I made that choice.” He stopped suddenly, aware that he’d admitted he’d been harboring ill feelings toward Chester about the whole thing. _Maybe this is where all the craziness is coming from. The jealousy and the anger. I’ve been blaming Chester for my choices._

“You did,” Chester agreed. “I told you not to do it. And, Mike, you can still get out of it. All of it,” he insisted as he sat back in his chair. “Mark will let you out of your contract. I know it’s hard for you, and I appreciate why you’re trying to do it, I really do, but. . .” He paused as he let a breath out, his eyes zeroing in on the table top. “Maybe something will happen and it will just go away,” he mumbled. 

“No. No, it’s not going to go away. That’s what I’ve been hiding behind, and it’s not helping us. I only want to be in this for _us_ , for _you_ , because I love you, and I’m not going to let you be treated the way you were being treated. It’s like… it’s just wrong. You deserve love, Ches, you deserve to be taken care of. I want to be that person for you, that’s what I’ve been trying to do, that’s why I made the decision - me, I did it - to be there with you. And I need to figure out how to cope with the parts I don’t like before it hurts us.” Mike reached to pull his chair out and sit next to Chester at the table. “Does that make any sense to you? Am I explaining myself? I didn’t walk out earlier because I was mad at you, I was mad at the situation. I wish we didn’t have to be this way.” 

“I thought you hated me,” Chester admitted as he stared at the soft fabric of Mike’s pajama shirt. “And I think I understand what you’re saying. You go too far sometimes. Like over the weekend,” he explained as gently as he could. “When we’re there, we’re working. I know things between us are a little fucked up, but, Sexy Boy, you have to play along. And I know you hate that, but I don’t want to get in trouble. I don’t want you to get in trouble. I know you’re sick of me saying it, but we just have to get through the next two years. It’s not that long.” He looked up, hoping to meet an understanding in Mike’s eyes, but he wasn’t sure it was there. He felt his heart thump just a little harder at the sight of his lover’s dark eyes and thoughtful eyebrows, and he hoped that common ground was close. 

“I try, I swear I do,” Mike said before he rolled his eyes. “I mean, I could try harder, probably. Not probably. I could. Okay, I don’t try very hard.” His voice had lowered to a whisper and he had both hands on the table, silently fingering through a soundless melody on an invisible piano without noticing. “I’m sorry I embarrassed you. And I don’t want to get in trouble either. I just can’t help it sometimes. I don’t want anyone to hurt you, and I overreact when we’re there. I know there’s a lot you don’t say about Mark, and I know it hasn’t all been easy for you. Even though you’ve tried to play it off. When I kind of lose it like that, I’m not thinking straight.” 

“There’s nothing to say about Mark,” Chester was quick to say before he looked away and across the apartment. “And the others, they wouldn’t hurt me. But I’m going to try harder,” he decided as he looked back at Mike and offered a soft smile. “I know now that you worry about that, so I’ll try and keep that in mind. I know things get wild there sometimes. Well, you’ve seen,” he said with a slight gesture. “It’s part of trying to keep us all loosened up to act more natural. Jason says you can see it on film when someone is really enjoying something and when they’re not, you know, like it shows. Like, you can’t hide it.”

Mike looked up sharply and his hands froze on the table top. “That’s why they like us so much, isn’t it? That’s why they wanted me and that’s why they agreed to let us be exclusive. Because it shows on camera. They can tell we’re in love.” He waited a second while his realization sunk in. “I hate that. I hate that they’re stealing that from us.”

Chester went to defend his boss, but instead he just shook his head and whispered, “Yeah. I know you don’t watch our stuff or look at what the fans are saying, but they see it. Every scene we’ve done, that’s what comes up. People saying how they can tell there’s something more between us and Mark is making it public that we are. It’s making our numbers really good.” 

“Numbers,” Mike repeated tonelessly. “Because that’s what it’s all about, right? Having good numbers so they can take just a little bit more from us.” He stood up suddenly, pushing back his chair and heading for the bar, where he poked a finger into his lasagna. “We should eat, Ches. It’s not very hot anymore,” he added with regret in his voice. 

“It’s always about numbers, Mike,” Chester stated as he stood up. “It’s business. And I’m not hungry anyway. My head hurts.” He rubbed his forehead as he turned toward the bathroom. “I’m going to get some aspirin and go lay down.” 

“Okay.” Mike looked at the untouched plates of food and frowned. _He always puts so much effort into this, and I ruined it all by stomping out of here._ “How about I put all of this away in the fridge and I’ll meet you up there? Maybe you’ll let me rub your head a little bit the way you like it when you have a headache.” He picked up both plates and walked around the bar, ready to find something to cover them with quickly so he could join Chester upstairs.

A minute later Chester walked out of the bathroom with two little white pills cupped in his hand. “You can eat,” he offered as he walked into the kitchen and took down a glass to get some water. “I mean, I’ll always let you rub my head,” he added with a weak smile as he scooted around his boyfriend to get to the refrigerator, “but I know you’re hungry. You should eat and you can let me know if it turned out okay.” He looked away to quickly fill his glass halfway with the water from the door of the fridge before he headed for the stairs. 

As much as he wanted to follow Chester, his stomach wouldn’t allow it. “Well, okay. I’ll be quick,” Mike promised, watching Chester’s ass as he took the stairs up to their bedroom. “I’m right behind you!” he hollered, shoveling a few bites in his mouth and chewing while he put the rest of Chester’s hard work in the refrigerator. _It is good. And it will be here tomorrow. We can eat it when we get home, and everything will be fine._ A few more bites and a glass of water later, Mike headed for the bathroom to brush his teeth, then head upstairs to see if he could make his boyfriend feel any better.

****

Chester had his cell phone tucked between his shoulder and chin as he slid his arms around Mike’s waist from behind. He knew he only had a few seconds while he waited for Jason to pick up on the other end, and he didn’t want to waste them. Their tests had come back clean, and that had meant lots of kisses to make up for the lack of kisses yesterday. 

He petted his lips over the back of his boyfriend’s neck before he peered over his shoulder. Mike had set up a new canvas earlier that morning to start a painting, but Chester wanted his attention one last time before he made his round of phone calls to assure everyone they were okay, and currently clean from all STDs. “When you get done, we need to go upstairs,” Chester whispered before he grabbed Mike’s earlobe and sucked on it for a second as he listened to his phone call out. 

“Mmm,” Mike mumbled, leaning his head in Chester’s direction. “Keep doing that and I won’t get done.” It was a relief to have the morning over with, to have the air clear, and to put all the worries about their health behind them. For now. He was close enough to Chester’s phone to hear Jason’s hello and felt Chester quickly pull away from him. 

“Jason, it’s Chester.” 

“I know.” 

Chester stopped, his eyebrows furrowing for a second. “Right. Well, just wanted to let you know we got our tests, and we’re clean and good to go. The clinic is going to send you the copies.” There was silence, and it paused Chester from the pacing he’d started around the loft, but a second later he heard Jason let out a sigh of relief. 

“Good. I mean, I had no reason to think you both wouldn’t be, given your new circumstances, but you just never know. There’s still a few results I’m waiting on before I’ll have a shooting schedule.” There was a pause, then he said softer, “Ry’s fine, too, Chaz. Just so you know.” 

Chester’s gaze went up to the ceiling as he felt a weight lift off his stomach. “I’m so glad to hear that,” he admitted. “So now we just wait to hear from you, right? We can be in holding mode for a bit?” He turned, looking in Mike’s direction, but his lover was already dabbing what looked like meaningless blobs of paint all over the rather large canvas. 

“Yeah. I’m hoping to have an all clear by the end of the day.” 

Chester’s question cut through Mike’s concentration, his ears picking up on the thought that they might get a bit of extra time away from YRS. _We probably won’t get that lucky. Everything will come back fine and then work will continue as normal._ He pressed his paintbrush down onto the canvas with a little more force than necessary. _But we’re safe. That’s enough for now._

“Okay, well we’re here all week,” Chester assured him. “The last twenty-four hours has been exhausting. We’re going to be total couch potatoes for the next few days. You won’t have any trouble reaching us,” he stated with a quirky smile. 

“I’ll be in touch,” Jason promised, before he said goodbye and ended the call.

Mike glanced over at his boyfriend, his lips twisting into a half smile. “Couch potatoes? You didn’t seem very couch potato-ish a few minutes ago. More like… sexy bed hog-ish.” He chuckled a bit under his breath, his whole body feeling lighter now that the worst seemed to have passed. 

“I meant couch potatoes in the more universal, general kind of way,” Chester said, rolling his hand through the air as he spoke. “Oh, I’m going to call Ry real quick and let him know all is well.” He went to pull up his friend’s name in his contacts, but stopped. “That’s okay, right?” he asked, even though that felt a little weird. He knew Mike wasn’t Ryan’s biggest fan and after the drama over the weekend and the day before, Chester was still trying to be cautious. 

“You could just text him,” Mike said first, then shrugged. “Or call, whatever.” He tried to sound as though Chester calling Ryan didn’t bother him, but it did for some reason. _I guess the topic of STD tests is something they’ve discussed many times, before I came along. It won’t be a long conversation. And it doesn’t matter, ultimately, if Chester wants to tell him himself. It’s a thirty second conversation. Hi, I’m clean, oh you are too? Great. Doesn’t matter, I’m never having sex with you again. Ever._ Mike smirked to himself as he pushed his paintbrush into the canvas again. 

“I’m going to call,” Chester said absently as he walked away and headed toward the kitchen. He heard Ryan pick up, and before he could say anything, he was already being grilled. 

“Chaz, are you clean? How about Mike? I haven’t heard anything yet from anyone. Well, I heard from Jay, but he hadn’t heard from you yet.” 

Chester smiled as he leaned against the counter by the sink, keeping his voice low as he watched Mike from across the room. “I’m fine. _We’re_ fine. We both got a green light. I just got off the phone with Jason.”

“Oh, thank God,” Ryan said in one big gulp of air. “I mean, if anyone was going to be safe, it would have been you two, but, I know things happen and it could be anyone. Jay’s clean, too,” he added, even though he figured Jason probably already relayed that information himself. 

_Okay, you’ve said what needs to be said. Wrap it up, babe._ Mike was straining to listen to the conversation, annoyed that Chester had walked into the other room and dropped his voice as well. _There’s no reason to go in there to talk._ He sized up the blotches on paint on the canvas and added a few more spots, not entirely sure what the outcome was supposed to be. _It’s all crazy and chaotic, like my head the past two days. Maybe it’s just going to be abstract. I probably should have had a plan before I started._

Chester changed counters, leaning over the one now, his elbows resting on the surface as he continued to watch Mike punish the canvas in front of him. “So did Jason say that Mark was pissed? Man, I’m glad we weren’t there when Toby showed up. Fucked up as that is.” 

“Yeah, Jay said he went nuts. Broke some shit and yelled a lot. I. . .I wish I would have been there. You know, just so Jay wasn’t there alone to sit through Mark’s destructive bullshit.” 

Mike could feel the undertone of something dangerous in Chester’s low voice when he asked about Mark, and he felt a chill slide down his spine. _For once I wish I could hear what Ryan has to say. Chester probably won’t even tell me. He never gives up any information about Mark. It’s like, it’s like he protects that asshole without realizing that he does it. But I know, I can tell, there’s more there than he says. Something darker than just being an asshole to his employees._ He frowned and looked at the acrylic on his palette. He needed red. Red felt right. 

“I don’t even want to think about going back on Friday, if we get to go back by then,” Chester deadpanned, his eyes hitting the dark floors that ran the length of the loft. “Mark is going to lecture all of us. Or worse.” 

“That’s still a few days away,” Ryan offered. “He’ll probably calm down a bit by then. Maybe they won’t get it sorted and we’ll get an extra weekend off. Jay said they have to file paperwork and stuff when something like this happens.” 

Mike leaned over and opened two different drawers, looking for the shade of red he wanted before he called into the kitchen, “babe? Did you move any of my paint? I can’t find a red I want.”

Chester’s eyes pulled up from the floor to see his boyfriend staring at him. He never touched Mike’s art stuff. Ever. And he knew Mike knew that, too. “Ry, I gotta go,” he said into his phone as he stood himself up straight. “Let me know if you hear anything from Devon and the others.” 

“Yeah, absolutely,” Ryan was quick to agree before they hung up. Chester walked around the bar and headed for the living room. “You know I don’t touch your stuff, Sexy Boy,” he said, flashing a quick smile. 

With a heavy sigh, Mike nodded. “I know. I just can’t find it.” He poked around a little more and mumbled, “maybe I used it all. I can’t remember.” His eyes flicked over to Chester, taking in his smile, and he couldn’t help himself from asking, “did Ryan say anything interesting?”

“He’s clean,” popped out of Chester’s mouth immediately before he sat down on the couch sideways so he could face Mike. “And Jason is, too. Other than that, not really. Jason said we have to wait, so guess we’ll see how long that takes. I’ve never been through this before,” he added, his fingers scratching at the material of the couch. 

Mike sat back, slamming the drawer shut with a huff. “I guess I used it all. Anyway, I’m not anxious to go back or anything, so I hope it takes a while.” He picked up the paintbrush again but didn’t turn back to his work. He was eyeing Chester instead. “You haven’t said much about everything since we got home. What are you thinking now? Knowing we’re okay?” 

“I’m feeling relieved,” Chester said with a shrug. “Really fucking relieved. And a little worried about the others, I guess. Who knows how long Toby had that, and Caleb. . .he’s so young. I mean, I guess we’re all young.” 

“You don’t feel that way, though, do you?” Mike said, the realization suddenly clicking for him. “Ches, you’re only a year older than me. Just because you’ve been doing this for a while, doesn’t mean this is all you’re ever going to know. You know that, right? We’ve got so much more to look forward to than YRS.” He glanced at the wet canvas and his open paint, but set it aside anyway to stand up and go sit down on the couch next to his boyfriend. “You know what we should do?”

“No,” Chester answered honestly. “What do you have in mind?” 

“Let’s make hot chocolate. With marshmallows. And go upstairs and crawl in bed, and drink hot chocolate and talk about all the things we want to do. Even the stuff that sounds like it’s dreaming too big. Let’s just spend the rest of the afternoon thinking about all the things we could do, or the things we can help each other do. Just escape this crappy last twenty-four hours and not think about real life.” Mike smiled and covered Chester’s hand that was picking at the couch with his own. “Doesn’t that sound nice? Just dreaming a little bit together?” 

The feel of Mike’s hand on his was nice and Chester nodded, even though he was a little lost on what his boyfriend was going for. “Sure,” he said, his lips rolling together as he tried to think of what he would be able to add to the deep, meaningful conversation he knew Mike wanted to have. _I kind of figured after my contract was up I’d learn the behind the scenes stuff. . .but he won’t want to hear that. He wants me to go to school, but I don’t want that. So what the hell am I going to say? Maybe I won’t have to, I’ll let him do most of the talking._ “And I can always go for hot chocolate,” he said with a soft smile before he stood up. “I think we still have some in the cabinet.” 

“I know how to make good hot chocolate,” Mike said seriously, standing up too but reaching to pull Chester into his arms. “It’s just a comfort thing, Ches. Something I’ve always done when I was upset, or bothered by something. Hot chocolate, it makes things better.” He kissed the outside of Chester’s ear and whispered, “I just wanted to share that with you. And stop thinking about work.”

“I’ll let you lead the way then,” Chester said, stepping back and motioning toward the kitchen. “I’ll watch you and maybe I’ll learn something new.” 

Mike rolled his eyes, grabbing Chester’s hand to drag him along. “I doubt it. But come on. Painting can wait, everything can wait. I just want to be alone with you.” He smiled, thinking of questions he could ask to get Chester to talk about the future, making a list in his head. “I always make my hot chocolate with milk, even though some people do it with water.” Mike paused as they rounded the bar. “Have we really never had hot chocolate together? After all this time? I just realized I don’t know how you like yours.” 

“Guess there’s a lot you don’t know about me,” Chester said, meaning for it to be cute, but the snap in Mike’s eyes made him look away. “However you make them is fine. I usually have coffee, you know? But hot chocolate is a nice change. My mom usually makes it around the holidays.” 

“We should go see her,” Mike said easily, dropping Chester’s hand and opening the refrigerator for the milk. “It’s been a while.” He busied himself with the relatively simple task of making their drinks, avoiding the topic of things he still didn’t know about his boyfriend. 

“She loves it when we come over. We could go over there everyday and she’d never get tired of us.” He watched Mike move around the kitchen, and the thought to grab the whiskey from the cabinet popped through his mind. He was pretty sure you could spike hot chocolate just as easily as you could spike anything else. He went to open his mouth to suggest it, but stopped when he noticed the clock on the wall. It wasn’t even lunch time yet. Mike would never go for alcohol this early in the day. 

“Lots of marshmallows or a few?” Mike asked, his back still to Chester. “I’m loading mine up. It’s like, half marshmallow and half milk.” He looked down at his cup and then over his shoulder. “It’s the best way.”

“However you want to make them, Sexy Boy,” Chester answered. “In fact, I trust you so much I’ll let you finish those and bring them upstairs. I’m going to go up now and get naked to wait for you.” He tossed Mike a quick wink before he spun around and headed for the stairs, not bothering to wait for his lover to agree. _Naked in bed. We won’t be talking about the future for long._ Chester chuckled to himself as he went, and before he’d even made it up to their bedroom, he’d already decided that when Mike saw him next, he’d be in his birthday suit with the spiked collar around his neck. 

****  
TBC


	32. Upstairs Ultimatum

The sun was just far enough over the horizon that Mike didn’t have to squint into it as Chester drove them back to YRS on Friday morning. _It’s too early for this. I don’t know why we have to be earlier than usual today, just because Toby and Josh both got fired. That’s got nothing to do with us. Thank God._

Mike cast a long sideways glance at his boyfriend, who was driving along with no troubles showing on his face. _Nothing seems to phase him at all. And I can’t figure out for the life of me how Josh ends up with herpes and Caleb is fine. None of this makes any sense. And when we talked about it he just shrugged. Shrugged!_ He looked back out at the road ahead of them and scowled. _He gets upset with me when I don’t understand but then he doesn’t tell me stuff. And I’m not holding any of this against him or anything, but it can still bother me. That’s not holding it against him, right? I guess Mark will partner Devon with Caleb. Is that how that works? They just move on to the next person?_

He shifted in his seat as he flipped through the roster of boys in his mind, thinking about the potential partners Chester had in his past that he hadn’t spoken about. None of which mattered, because deep down, despite his general lack of understanding about how things at YRS worked, Mike knew that Chester loved him. It showed in the little things Chester did to make him happy... the way he made his favorite things for dinner, or rubbed his socked feet on the couch at night, or gazed at him through sleepy eyes in the morning. He knew what they had was more meaningful than any relationship either of them had been in previously, and he had been trusting of Chester when he said, even before they were together, that work didn’t mean anything. Still, it was going to be hard to walk back into the big house knowing what he knew now. Knowing that Chester had been with everyone there, one way or another. 

Chester looked over, catching the scowl on his boyfriend’s face. “You okay?” he asked, his sincerity showing. They had already talked about how returning to YRS might be a little awkward the first day, but Mike didn’t look anxious. He looked pissed. 

“I just… I’m not ready to go back,” Mike grumbled, keeping his eyes away from Chester. “A lot has happened. I guess I still haven’t processed it all. And I don’t know why we have to be there two hours earlier than normal. Our last few hours on Friday mornings… those are important to me, Ches.” He sighed, the anger fading a little as he looked down at his open flannel shirt, picking at the buttons with his right hand. “I feel like something’s been taken from me. Everything was rushed this morning.” 

Chester rolled his lips together, squishing his piercing as he thought. “Well,” he started before he let out a sigh and took a right at the stop sign. “Ryan said that Jason said that Mark wants us all there early to, you know, talk about things.” He glanced over, hoping not to get Mike’s usual glare whenever he mentioned Ryan’s name. 

“Talk about things. Like… why do we need to be there? It’s just you and me, Ches. We’re not partnering with anyone else. We’re fine. Safe. The tests were clean.” Mike looked over at Chester, his eyebrows furrowed in thought. “We could have stayed in bed together this morning.” 

Chester shrugged. There was no use in trying to argue with Mike when he was in a mood like this. Nothing would get through. “That would have been nice, but we have to work.” He kept his eyes on the road, and it was almost a sigh of relief to see the YRS property in the distance. _Now we can get this over with. Get through today and things should get back to normal. It’s going to be kinda weird without Toby being around. . .or Josh. Damn. I know Devon’s pissed._

Mike didn’t know what else to say, so he didn’t say anything. He looked out the side window and wished for the millionth time he could get Chester away from YRS. He could feel his teeth clench as Chester parked the car and they both moved to get out. Despite his mood, he reached for Chester’s hand and held it possessively. It was important to present a united front when it came to Mark, at least in Mike’s mind. 

Chester pulled his sunglasses off and sat them snuggly on his head, right on top of his backwards baseball cap as they headed up the walk. The morning air was warm, but because it was so early there was still a small nip in it, and Chester shivered just as they got to the front doors. He looked over at Mike, but didn’t say anything as he opened them. 

Adam was quick to meet them, giving them both handshakes and welcoming them back to work. “I was hoping we’d get an extra week off,” Chester joked, though he realized that might have been in poor taste from the frown that sketched across the guard’s face. Chester dropped his eyes to his sneakers and the way his socks stuck out of them, his shorts hiding nothing as he cursed himself. He went to apologize just as he heard Jason’s voice. He and Mike both turned to see their boss heading toward them, waving his arm at them to come along. 

“We’re meeting in the dining room, Brad’s got muffins,” Jason said hastily. “Mark’s got stuff he wants to talk about. You two get in there and I’ll go find Ryan. I’m not sure where he’s gotten off to,” he added, and then he was down the hallway.

Mike turned and tugged on Chester’s hand. “Muffins? I hope they’re still warm.” 

“Don’t know,” Chester said, as he nodded a goodbye to Adam and then he led the way down the hallway. The closer to the dining room they got, the more said muffins were becoming a reality. Blueberry and apple were the two Chester’s nose picked up on, though he would have sworn there was banana nut in there, too. “See, meetings aren’t too terrible,” he whispered just as they stepped in the dining room to see Amir, Devon, and Caleb all seated at the table. Mark was over by the window, checking his watch with one hand square on the hip of his black Dockers. 

With a quick look over at Mark, Mike pulled Chester’s usual chair out for him before he took his own seat at his side. He wanted to reach for a muffin but he knew better than to help himself. They would be told when they could eat. Another frown crossed his lips as he looked across the table to see Amir’s cool eyes assessing him. _It’s too fucking early for Amir’s sass. I hope whatever Mark has to say, Amir just lets him say it so we can eat. Brad makes the best muffins. Well, pretty awesome muffins. Obviously Chester’s are better._ He looked sideways at Chester and then back at the muffins, folding his hands in his lap and waiting impatiently.

A moment later and Brad was in the room, pushing his silver cart that was lined with champagne flutes full of freshly made screwdrivers. “Morning, boys,” he greeted everyone as he started to sit the drinks down in front of each person and empty chair, knowing that all but two would be full. One of the wheels on his cart squeaked as he turned it, and he was quick to apologize the moment he heard Mark’s grumble. “Guess it’s time for a new serving cart,” the chef announced as he pushed the sleeves of his light colored shirt up, like he was preparing to do something spectacular. “Or maybe I can wish this one to fix itself!” He waved his hands around, earning him a grin from Chester and Devon both, before he threw his hands up in the air and declared defeat. 

“Alright, alright,” Mark barked as he walked over to the serving cart and picked up a champagne flute. “If you need a new one, we’ll get a new one,” he said, his voice lowered. “But not this week. Way too much fucking shit going on this week.” 

Brad agreed, before he pushed the cart from the room, reminding everyone that the muffins were homemade as he went. “I’ve been up since four o’clock this morning, washing and peeling and chopping for you boys,” he made sure to add over his shoulder, just before his wild curly hair disappeared from view. 

Mike watched with dismay as Chester picked up his drink, but before he could say anything about drinking before eight am, or any time before noon, for that matter, Jason and Ryan appeared. He thought Jason looked a little flustered as he took his seat, and Ryan sat several seats away on the other side of Chester, the way he always did. _They look guilty every time I see them now. Maybe it’s just because I’ve seen them together, it’s obvious. I don’t know how they have the guts to mess around right under Mark’s nose._

“Hey,” Ryan whispered to Chester, “you guys okay this morning?” 

Chester leaned a little close. “Yeah. Mike’s a little on edge, but we’re good. Any word from Toby or Josh?” 

Before Ryan could say anything, Mark had the room’s attention, tapping the side of his champagne flute, like he was about to give a toast at a wedding. His screwdriver was almost half gone. “Listen up, boys,” he said. “I wanted you all here early this morning so we could go over some refresher dos and don’ts. And you all know what I’m talking about,” he said, his gray eyes scanning from face to face all around the table, like every person in front of him was guilty of some unspoken crime. “I know that by now you’re all aware that Toby has been let go, and, unfortunately, so has Josh.” He paused for a moment, his gaze dropping onto Devon, who was staring at the drink in front of him like it was special. “When people aren’t safe, it hurts us all in this business. Jason and I have done everything we need to do to continue running the business side of things, but I don’t have to remind you all what something like this can do to the reputation of our company.” 

Jason’s eyes flicked unwillingly to Ryan before he remembered himself. “Thank you guys for getting in to get tested so quickly, so we could make sure the issue was contained and that you all are safe. It’s important that we keep it that way.” 

Mike thought Jason’s voice was a little more compassionate than Mark’s, but it made sense to him. _He’s got more to lose than almost anyone here. If Ryan came up with something. Or Mark even. What a screwed up situation._ He reached under the table and squeezed Chester’s thigh gently. _I’m so, so glad we don’t have to worry about this._

“That’s right,” Mark agreed, lifting his flute toward his husband. “You all did an excellent job when it came to getting tested. For the next three months or so, we’re going to have you all get tested twice a month, just to make absolutely sure everyone is okay.” He stopped as gasps went around the table. “It’s not that bad,” he told them all. “Even Jason and I are going to do it, so just remember it’s for your good. And along with that,” he said, taking in a deep breath and straightening out his off-white shirt front, “everyone here needs to remember that you work in porn and have sex with people for a living.” He flung his gaze around the confused faces at the table. “When you’re out there getting it on with non-porn workers - and I know you all are - just remember to keep yourselves safe,” he told them, his finger pointing right at Devon and then to Amir before it slowly made its way to Mike and Chester. “No one is an exception. I know what goes on outside of these walls, and while you’re all Tom catting around, fucking everyone you get the opportunity with, remember your coworkers and be safe every single time.” 

“Hmmpf.” Amir crossed his arms and looked up at Mark, a scowl on his face. “You act like we’re all out fucking whoever we can get our hands on, like we’re complete idiots or something. Bottom line is we all have to trust each other. I know Ryan’s not out fucking every guy on the block without a condom, it’s not like we don’t _talk_ you know.” He flipped his bangs out of his face and ignored the way Ryan was staring at him with a shut-the-fuck-up look on his face. “Seems like if you’re that worried about what we’re all doing, you could make everyone exclusive the way you’ve done Mike and Chester.” 

Mark sat his empty champagne flute down on the table with a _thump_. “I know you’re not idiots,” he said, both his hands on the table as he leaned forward to address Amir. “And I know you all talk and some of you are even. . .close.” His eyes flipped from Ryan back to Amir as he let the air out through his nostrils. “But tell me, did any of you know Toby was going to turn up positive? As I recall, every single one of you were shocked when you found out,” he reminded them as he stood up straight and raised his voice. “And don’t even give me more bullshit about them being exclusive, it means nothing,” he hissed as he pointed toward Mike and Chester for half a second. “They got tested just the same as everyone else here, and I hope they were smart enough to tell anyone else they’ve been screwing around with about this scare so they could go get tested too, because STDs spread like wildfire, boys.” He took a step back, his lips going to a thin line as he stared Amir down, ready for him to say more. He’d already fired two boys this week, one more wouldn’t hurt. 

Mike felt his fingers dig into Chester’s legs little harder as he struggled to keep himself from standing up and giving Mark a piece of his mind. He met Amir’s eyes for a moment before he looked defiantly at Mark and said, “yeah, we got tested, but only because you forced us to. We’re _together_ , and not just for the sake of your business. There’s no reason to be concerned about us - Chester and I are only with each other. Here and away from here.” He glared at Mark for a moment, pissed off that he was implying that either of them were less than completely faithful.

Mark rolled his eyes. “You can believe anything you want, Mike, but I know that man sitting next to you a lot better than you do. And even if he has been faithful in private, for work he’s been in plenty of beds.” He went to say more, but tossed his hand through the air instead. He didn’t feel like arguing - again - with Mike Shinoda. He knew he couldn’t fire him, at least not yet. As far as he could tell, Mike still had his possessive claws pretty deep in Chester, and until he could change that, he had to put up with Mike’s mouth. 

Mark cleared his throat to refocus as he looked away from his prize couple. “Now, moving forward, everyone drink up and eat some muffins. Jason and will be rearranging a few things. . .Devon, you and Caleb will need to finish up the series you and Josh started,” he said, and he felt his shoulders slump with his words. It was just a damn shame to be in the middle of a fan favorite series and then have something like this happen. “We’ll go over details after breakfast,” he added bitterly. He spun away from his employees, grabbed Jason’s untouched drink from the table, and took it with him out the doorway. 

Jason’s eyes followed Mark, his lips pressed into a thin line. It didn’t escape any of the boy’s notice that the boss had walked out with Jason’s drink, and everyone at the table knew if Mark kept drinking at this rate the day could only go one of two ways. He’d either drag someone off in private or they’d all end up with Mark breathing down their necks in some intense shoots later in the day. Jason looked down at his plate, avoiding the way the boys were sharing knowing glances around the table. There was nothing he could do when Mark was in a mood, and knowing their employees knew it too was embarrassing. Clearing his throat, he looked up, his eyes locking with Ryan’s.

“Go ahead,” he said, working to keep his voice authoritative as he motioned to the muffins in the center of the table. “You know Brad will be back soon and if these muffins aren’t gone, we’ll never hear the end of it.” He saw Ryan’s reassuring wink before he reached for a banana nut muffin, and Jason slowly blew out a breath he hadn’t realized he was holding. 

Chester’s appetite had vanished as he watched everyone at the table reach for their muffin of choice. He wrapped his arm around his stomach instead and sipped from his champagne flute as his mind tossed over names. _I don’t have anyone I need to warn about the STD scare. I haven’t been with anyone other than Mike since we’ve been together. Well, no one outside of work, and I know Jason has told everyone. . .past and present, so I should be good. Even if there would be a reason to tell the people before Mike, I, I have no idea how to find any of them._ His shoulders slumped a little before he glanced over at Mike. _I hope he doesn’t believe what Mark said. . .I’ve been faithful. Surely Mike knows that. Of course he does. Mark’s just pissed and paranoid. This day needs to be over already._

“Ches?” Mike whispered as he leaned and nudged his boyfriend with his shoulder. “You gonna eat?” He already had two muffins on his plate, a blueberry and a banana nut, and he pointed at Chester’s empty plate. “You need something in your stomach other than that drink.” _He looks upset now. Over what? What Mark said? Fuck Mark. It’s just me and Chester. We’re fine. It’s stupid we have to get tested twice a month, but whatever. It’s just wasting Mark’s money._ “Come on, babe,” he whispered with his lips close to Chester’s ear, “you know how I feel about vodka at eight am.” Mike kissed the bottom of Chester’s earlobe gently and took the almost empty champagne flute from his hand, placing it on the table next to his completely full one. 

“I’m not hungry anymore,” Chester whispered back before he pushed his chair out. “I’ll be right back. Gotta hit the restroom before the madness starts.” He smiled weakly at his boyfriend before he glanced around the table and the sets of eyes that were now on him before he pushed his chair in and left the room. 

Mike started to push his chair back, to follow after Chester, but he knew his boyfriend would protest. There was no reason to get up when he hadn’t eaten breakfast yet, and Chester wouldn’t be long. He looked around the table and his eyes caught Amir’s again, who was looking at him with interest. “What?” he asked as he peeled the wrapper off his muffin.

With a point of his muffin in Mike’s direction, Amir said, “you. You’ve got some big balls to talk at Mark that way.”

“It’s no different than how you talk to him,” Mike defended, taking a huge bite out of his blueberry muffin after he spoke.

“I’ve been here a lot longer than you have,” Amir stated flatly. “And I’ve made him a ton of money. Eventually this thing with you and Chester will wear thin, and then what? He can’t partner either of you up with anyone to make it fresh, and correct me if I’m wrong,” he said, sliding his gaze over to Jason, “Mark doesn’t seem to be too fond of you, Mikey. I think he merely tolerates you.”

Mike felt his face flush with shame and anger as Jason stepped in. “That’s enough of that. We all know Mark doesn’t keep around anyone that he doesn’t have a use for, whether he likes them or not. I could say the same thing about how Mark feels about _your_ mouth, Amir. Who cares?” His voice dropped low and he looked around the table. “We’re all playing a dangerous game here. There’s no need to turn on each other. Everyone needs to be safe and stay clean and stay off Mark’s radar. Exclusivity or not,” he added, looking at Mike. “Things can change around here fast, as you’ve seen.”

Mike finished one muffin and unwrapped the second, looking down into his plate and away from everyone else. _I can’t help it. I hate him so much, I can’t stop myself sometimes. And what he said about Ches, I just… it’s not true. I know him. He’d never cheat on me._ He picked at the top of the muffin for a second and then looked back at Amir. “I know I’m the new guy. But you all know why I’m here. It’s for Chester and no other reason. And as soon as we’re able, we’re both out of here. I’ve made no secret of the fact that I don’t want to be here, but it’s _worth it_ to me to keep Chester safe. You understand, don’t you, Jason?” His voice was softer than it had been earlier, a little bit pleading as he looked at his other boss. 

Their eyes met before Jason looked at Ryan, his gaze softening as he wished he could do for him what Mike did for Chester. He wanted to protect him, keep him away from Mark, take him away from YRS altogether. He _did_ understand, and that made everything about his position and his secret affair that much more painful. “I know what it’s like to want to protect the person you love, Mike… but you have to be careful. You haven’t been here long enough to know what Mark is truly capable of… just… be careful.”

Everyone ate in silence then, thinking over Jason’s last words and all that had happened. Mike glanced toward the living room, but Chester was nowhere to be seen. He looked around the table, at Ryan and Jason watching each other, at Devon and Caleb eating, and reached for one more muffin. _If he’s not back by the time I finish this muffin, I’m following him,_ he promised himself, _no matter how paranoid or possessive it makes me look._

Upstairs, Chester walked into his assigned bedroom, cursing his luck. “If there was an award for clumsy, I’d fucking get it,” he swore under his breath as he tugged at the front of his now torn t-shirt. He quickly pulled it off and over his head, his hand going to the red scrape on his side where he’d gotten snagged on the sharp jagged edge of the oddly shaped art deco shelving in the downstairs bathroom. 

Chester tossed the ripped shirt onto the bed before he pulled his baseball cap off, too. He scrubbed his fingers through his flat mohawk, knowing he needed to grab his hair care caddy to take back to the bathroom. It was time to work, which meant it was time to look the part. It was time to be Charlie Bang, and that meant spiking his bright red mohawk up as far as it would go. 

He looked toward the closet, debating over his shirt collection in his mind, just as the bedroom door opened. Chester turned, expecting to see Mike, but it was his boss who stepped in. Mark’s gray eyes landed on him immediately, and Chester took a step back.

“Where’s Mike?” Mark asked as he glanced around the room - the bed, the chair, the dresser, the open window and the morning light pouring through it - it all seemed empty other than Chester standing half naked at the end of the bed. 

“He’s still eating,” Chester answered with a swallow. “I just came up to get ready.” 

Mark nodded before he turned around and shut the door. “Have a seat first, Chaz,” he stated as he officially walked into the room, his hands going to the hips of his dark Dockers.

Chester let out a breath before he moved around to sit on the edge of the bed, wishing he had a shirt on. He wrapped his arms around his bare stomach. “Okay, what’s up?” he asked as he watched Mark pace back and forth in front of him. 

“You know how much you mean to me,” Mark said, rolling one hand out in front of him as he spoke, “to YRS, I mean. But, Chaz, you’ve got to do something about Mike.” He stopped and whirled around, facing his employee as he looked down on him. “That shit he pulled downstairs, I’m getting sick of it, Chester.” 

“Well. . .” Chester started to say, but Mark was already swinging his hands around as he continued to rant. 

“I let him come here for you, but I’m only going to let him push me so far. And I certainly can’t have him mouthing off in front of the other boys!” He stopped, his chest heaving slightly as he looked Chester up and down. For as long as he’d known him, he’d always been able to get the younger man to do anything he wanted, he just had to word it right. Mark took a calming breath, knowing that with Chester, it was easier to use guilt than threats. Threats were only needed when the guilt wasn’t enough, or when Mike was feeding too much into his head about what was and wasn’t _right_. “Chaz,” Mark said, taking his voice down into something calmer. Smoother. “I need you to remember just how much I’ve done for you.” 

Chester looked up as he gripped his fingers into the blanket he was sitting on. Mark was looking right at him now, and walking over to stand directly in front of him. “I know,” he answered. “I’m sorry he said anything earlier in front of everyone, it’s just, you know he speaks his mind and we’re all upset about Toby and Josh.” 

“Chaz, believe me, I’m upset, too,” Mark insisted as he took a final step closer, pushing Chester’s closed legs apart so he could stand between them. He ran his hand down the side of Chester’s face, sliding one long finger to his jawline. “Look at me,” he whispered, and he smiled as Chester looked up. “Now, I want you to be happy. You know that, don’t you, Chaz?”

Chester found himself locked with Mark’s cloudy gray eyes and his parted lips that he knew were about to say more. “Yes,” Chester answered. Years of hearing this same question had taught him what the right answer was. 

“That’s right. I’ve done so much for you,” Mark said, keeping his finger on Chester’s face. “I let you keep your hair the way you like it,” he stated as he swiped his finger back up Chester’s face, and over the flat mohawk. “I let you live at my expensive loft for free. I even gave you permission to let Mike live there with you, and despite my better judgement, I allowed him to work here to be with you.” He feathered all five fingers down Chester’s neck before bringing them back to stroke over his earlobe. “And what have I gotten out of it? Mike yells at me in front of the boys. You need to talk to him, Chaz. You need to make him understand how things are.” 

Chester’s throat was dry as he rolled his top lip over his piercing. He wanted to defend Mike, but mostly he just wanted Mark to stop touching him. “I’ll try,” he managed to say, just as he felt Mark’s large hand drop to his neck and squeeze just a little. 

“You better,” Mark, said, his voice coming out in more of a growl. “If you don’t, then I think back rent on the loft is going to come due real quick. How’s your mother going to get along if you don’t have a paycheck coming in?” 

“No,” Chester said quickly, and he felt Mark’s grip tighten. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry. I’ll talk to Mike,” he promised, with his heart pounding in his ears. He shut his eyes, ready to feel Mark’s hand grab him even harder, but he didn’t. To his surprise, he felt Mark let go before he stepped back. Chester opened his eyes just in time to see the older man smiling at him. 

“Good. I’m glad we still understand each other, Chazzy. You know, ever since Mike’s been here, you and I just don’t seem to have the same connection anymore,” he said, flashing his employee a dramatic sad face. “I have to say it seems really selfish of Mike to try and stop what we had going.” He motioned between himself and Chester, and a second later he couldn’t help himself. Watching Chester cringe under his grip and agree so easily to do his wishes was a turn on. Already Mark could feel the ache inside his briefs as his gaze drifted over Chester’s pale skin and colorful tattoos. “Come here,” he called, as he took a half step forward and opened his arms. 

Chester’s jaw was shaking as he looked at his boss. It had been months now since he’d been in Mark’s arms, and the idea shivered through him as he pressed his feet into the floor and stood up from the bed. Before he knew it, Mark had him in a hug, and Chester could smell the alcohol on his boss’s breath. 

“We’ve always been good together, Chaz,” Mark whispered as he pressed his lips close to Chester’s ear, and then around the side of his face. “I’ve missed you. . .have you missed me?” 

Chester’s eyes were closed as he fought with himself. He knew what Mark wanted to hear, which wasn’t what he wanted to say. 

“It’s okay,” Mark assured him, his hands sliding up and down Chester’s naked back. “No one has to know. Mike doesn’t have to know.” He pressed his lips to Chester’s cheek, and then to his lips in a quick _pop!_ before he pulled back just enough to see a different look in his employee’s eyes. 

“Don’t,” Chester finally said, as he shifted away from Mark’s touch. “Mark, I can’t do that with you anymore, you know that,” he said, his voice coming out in a loud whisper. His eyes shot toward the still closed door. “I’m going to go back downstairs with the others. With Mike.” He got two steps toward the door, before he felt Mark’s hand wrap around his arm. 

“You’re not going anywhere!” the older man snarled, yanking Chester back in front of him. “I’m _not_ done with you. Now, you might have a boyfriend, and you might have even taken advantage of _my_ kindness by getting a contract for him, but you’re still _mine_.” Mark’s grip on Chester’s arm tightened as he held him around the waist with his other arm. “I’m going to take what I want. What belongs to me. I agreed to Mike’s no sex rule, but you can get on your knees and do what I say and that’s not against the contract.” 

Chester knew he was shaking, and he hated himself for it. There was no question what Mark wanted, and his stomach turned. “No,” he dared to whisper as he tried to gather his courage and pull away. If he could just get to the door - get to the hallway - Mark would back off. “I can’t, Mike -”

Mark shoved Chester forward, just to bring him right back up against himself. “Fuck your little boyfriend,” he seethed, his breath heavy and right in Chester’s face. “Now you listen to me, I’ve given you a good life - I’ve given Mike a good life - but I can take that away. I can make this place a living hell for you, Chaz. For you. . .for Mike. . .for your mother. Now get on your knees and open that pretty mouth of yours.” 

Chester shut his eyes and ordered his mind to shut off, to go to that blank place he sent it during scenes he didn’t want to do, as he sunk to his knees. He felt the hardwood floor under him, and Mark’s hands sliding all over his face. 

“Look at me,” Mark whispered, the hard-on in his pants about to burst as he started to fumble to undo his belt with one hand. “You’re a good boy, Chazzy. You’re special, you know that, don’t you?” He waited, but there was no response, and the longer he looked down at Chester’s eyes that were squeezed so tightly shut, he felt his fist clench. “Look at me!” he barked.

Chester flinched as he opened his eyes, just in time to see Mark’s hand fly, and a second later he felt the hot sting on his cheek. Chester yelped as he held his face and cowered back.

“You’re going to suck me off,” Mark ordered, before he grabbed Chester’s chin and forced him to look up. “And if you scrape me, or get any bright ideas like biting me, I’ll make sure your ass pays for it later. And then Mike’s ass will pay for it. Do you understand?”

Chester nodded as best he could. His cheek felt like it was on fire, and his ear was ringing as he shut his eyes and tried to forget where he was. He put his hands behind his back, because he knew Mark liked it that way. He could hear his boss’s voice overhead, and he knew there was no getting out of what was about to happen. He licked his lips and opened his mouth, knowing it was easier if he went along with things. 

“You know I hate getting rough with you, Chazzy, but you brought that on yourself. Mike’s a bad influence on you. You’re going to enjoy this as much as I am. . .” 

“Ches? Are you in here?” Mike called, opening the door to their room and stopping short in disbelief as his eyes came to rest on his boyfriend, submissively on his knees in front of Mark, who looked enraged. It took a second to register what he was seeing, when he’d only been expecting Chester in the room, maybe laying down, maybe not feeling well. Not on the floor, not preparing to do what it looked like he was about to do, his hands clasped tightly behind his back, making it clear Mark’s belt hanging open in front of his face wasn’t his doing. “No! Get away from him!” Mike yelled as he rushed inside and pushed Mark away from Chester with both hands as hard as he could. “Chester, fucking get up!” He didn’t look down to see what his boyfriend was doing as he stepped between him and Mark. 

The abrupt interruption and physical push knocked Mark off his balance. He stumbled a few feet before he realized what had happened. “You!” he growled as he stood himself up straight. “Don’t you fucking push me.” He pointed at Mike with both his finger and his scowl before his eyes traveled down to see Chester still on the floor, huddled into a ball. “Why don’t you just get the hell out of here, Michael,” he hissed as he took a step forward. “Chazzy and I were about to have some fun.” Mark’s lips cracked into a smile as he breathed heavily, his fist balling up. “He likes it, you know. If you think you can trust him to not whore himself out, you’ve made a big mistake.” A low chuckle erupted from Mark’s throat as he went to shove Mike out of the way and grab at Chester’s naked back and shoulders. 

“You’re lying!” Mike screamed in Mark’s face as he pushed him again. “I know he wouldn’t do do that, and especially not with you!” He couldn’t look at Chester, but he knew it couldn’t be true. He hated Mark as much as everyone else did. Mike dared to take another step in Mark’s direction, trying to put more space between him and Chester in the small bedroom. 

Mark shoved the sleeves of his dress shirt up. There was no going back now. He’d already put Chester in his place, and now it was time to put Mike in his. “He’s done everything with me,” Mark stated with his teeth showing and his eyes narrowed. “And you will not shove me in my own home!” He lunged forward, grabbing onto Mike’s shirt and spinning him around to slam him into the nearby wall before he let him go and took a step back. 

Mike stumbled away from the wall, trying to catch his breath. Mark was bigger than he was, and he’d knocked the breath out of him when he slammed him into the wall. He pressed a hand to his chest and looked down at his boyfriend, fear flooding his system and replacing the anger he’d been feeling just moments ago. He’d told Chester he’d protect him at all costs, but he never really believed he’d end up in a physical fight with their boss. “Leave him alone,” Mike demanded, trying to not let his voice shake. “I don’t care what you say, nothing he’s ever done with you has been by choice.”

Mark’s gray eyes were locked on Mike as he said, “Get up and get on the bed, Chester. Now!” 

From the floor, Chester curled himself up a little more. He could hear Mike’s voice, but Mark’s was louder. Stronger. And instinct told him to stay down, to hide his face and wait for it to be over. 

Mark looked away for just a second - long enough to see that Chester hadn’t obeyed - and his stomach boiled. “It’s your fault!” he screamed as he bolted toward Mike, ready to sock him in his gut and send him crashing to the floor as well. 

“Mark!” Jason hollered from the doorway. “What’s going on in here?” He rushed inside, Ryan right behind him, in time to see his husband grab Mike by the arm. “What are you doing?” 

“Get the fuck out of here, Jason!” Mark yelled as he whirled around, Mike still in his clutch. “He’s had this coming for a long time!” 

“Stop it! Just stop!” Jason had his hands out as he stepped in front of Mark, and he looked over at Mike’s wide eyes. “We can talk through whatever it is, okay? Let him go, and let’s just talk.” His voice was calm but he had no idea how far things had gone before he and Ryan ran upstairs. All he’d heard was shouting and something - someone - hitting the wall. It was enough for him to know he had to intervene. It had already been a tough week, he couldn’t let Mark push things any further into the ground. 

“I’m not talking to this little cuss,” Mark spit, and he was ready to do more than throw names around. He wanted to punch Mike in the face. He wanted to kick him off of YRS property and never see him again. But as the seconds ticked by and Jason’s calm voice and reason sank in a little, he let his youngest employee go. He could still feel his heart pounding, and he couldn’t unball his fist as he looked from Jason’s pleading eyes to Chester and Ryan on the floor and back to Mike, who he hated with every fiber of his being. 

Mike couldn’t even react to Ryan on the floor, his arm looped around Chester’s back. _He’s between Mark and Ches, that’s good enough._ He looked over at Jason and then back at Mark, completely unsure what to do. He didn’t know if he should say anything or just wait to see what happened. The only thing he knew was that he wasn’t going to leave Chester behind to have any conversations anywhere. He wasn’t going to leave Chester alone again, ever.

He took a step back, his hand going behind him to steady himself against the wall as he took a few deep breaths, and watched as Jason reached out to tug at the sleeve of Mark’s shirt.

“Come on, you’ve had a little bit to drink already this morning. We’ll talk this through later, why don’t you come back to our room with me?” Jason coaxed, despite not wanting to be anywhere around Mark when he’d been drinking. It took everything in him not to make eye contact with Ryan as he tried to get Mark out of the room. With all the changes with the weekend shoots, the last thing any of them needed was Mark screwing up Mike and Chester’s by giving Mike a black eye or split lip. 

Ryan looked up just in time to see Jason leading Mark out of the room, and he let out a sigh of relief. “Chaz,” he whispered as he leaned his head back down to be close to his friend’s face. “He’s gone. Are you okay? He’s gone.” 

Chester dropped his arms away from his face enough to look over and see Ryan right next to him. His head hurt, and his cheek was still stinging a little as he went to sit up. “Where did he go?” he asked, even though he wasn’t exactly sure why as he groped at Ryan’s shirt front. 

Watching Chester paw at Ryan’s shirt mobilized Mike from his place on the wall. He dropped to the floor next to Ryan and put his arms out. “Ches, babe, come here,” he whispered, watching his boyfriend’s face. “Jason took him out. He’s gone, please… come here.” 

Chester slowly looked over, and the moment he saw Mike’s eyes, he was in his arms. He pulled Mike close, and buried his nose and mouth into his neck. “I’m sorry,” he mumbled. “I’m sorry.” He had his arms around Mike’s back, clinging onto him like he was the safety net. 

“Sorry? For what?” Mike pulled back a little, confusion all over his face. “You didn’t do anything wrong… right?” He hated himself the second that last word slipped out his mouth, hated the tiny seed of doubt Mark had planted in the back of his head. 

Chester looked away, his gaze hitting the wall and then the dresser. He wasn’t sure. Everything had escalated so quickly. One minute Mark was asking him to talk to Mike, and the next he was on his knees in front of his boss. “I don’t know,” he answered with his words shaking along with his hand as he cupped his sore cheek. 

Mike reached and pulled Chester’s hand gently away from his face, scanning his skin for any sign that Mark had hit him. “Ches? What do you mean you don’t know? What happened?” He looked over at Ryan for help. He knew if anyone could get Chester to talk about Mark, it would be Ryan. They seemed to share an understanding about things at YRS. 

Ryan reached over, cupping his hand on Chester’s arm. “Chaz, he’s not here,” he assured him. “Jason took him away. Did he smack you?” he asked. It wasn’t the first time he’d seen his friend with a red cheek. Mark’s hand could fly without warning. They’d all been there. 

Chester nodded slowly before he sat back on his bottom, his quivering finally slowing down. “He said a lot of things, I don’t know. He was being nice, you know like he does,” he said as he looked up to meet Ryan’s eyes. “And then. . .it went from talking about work to him wanting me to suck him off. And I told him no.” He paused, looking over at Mike. “I swear I said no.” 

“I’m going to fucking kill him,” Mike said without thought, his eyes darting to the door. “You’re off limits. It’s in the contract, he can’t touch you. Nobody can. You’re only for me.” He started to get up from the floor when they all heard the chime from Ryan’s cell phone in his pocket. 

“That’s Jason,” Ryan announced before he’d even pulled his phone out. He’d given his lover his own special ring and jingle a long time ago. He took a breath before he let go of Chester’s arm to focus on the message. 

**8:27 am** _Lay low. I’m gonna stay with him until the buzz wears off. Take Mike and Chaz and go back down._

Ryan looked up from his phone. “Jay says we should go downstairs and lay low.” He shook his head as he looked over at Chester. “God, Chaz, I’m so sorry. That bastard.” He patted Chester on the shoulder before he stood up. “I’ll get you a shirt,” he offered as he scooted around Mike to get to the closet. 

“No, that’s okay,” Mike said instantly, standing up and turning to face Ryan. “You can go now, we’ll meet you downstairs.” There was only so much caretaking of his boyfriend he was going to allow from Ryan. “I’ve got this,” he insisted, waving his hand toward the door. 

Ryan looked around Mike to try and get eye contact with Chester one last time. He didn’t want to leave him. Not while he was still on the floor. “I can help,” he whispered as he looked back at Mike. “I’ve been through this with him before,” he added, hating that he had to say that out loud. 

Mike looked from Ryan down to Chester, then back at Ryan. “Fine,” he hissed through gritted teeth. He still wasn’t on great terms with Ryan, but he knew that he and Chester had only had each other at YRS before he came along, and maybe Ryan would be useful at getting Chester up off the floor and talking again. “Ches? What shirt do you want, babe?” He held a hand out to his boyfriend, hoping he’d reach out and take it. 

“I don’t care,” Chester answered. His voice was low and broken as he took Mike’s hand, and allowed himself to be pulled to his feet. His head rushed for a second and he felt unstable as he stumbled forward a half a step. 

Ryan was quick to go to Chester’s side. He slid his arm around his back. “Easy,” he said. “Your equilibrium is probably off. That bastard.” He looked over at Mike, hoping he hadn’t crossed some line, even though he was only trying to help. 

“I’ve got him,” Mike said tightly, working hard to hold on to his self control. “You get the shirt.” He dismissed Ryan with his eyes and backed Chester to the bed. “Sit down, okay? Give yourself a second. Do you need me to get anything? Do you want some water or something?” Mike didn’t know what to do but he sure as hell wasn’t going to let Ryan do it all for him. 

“I’m okay,” Chester insisted as his senses started to flood back. He licked his dry lips and rubbed his arms. His skin felt cold, and even though he’d spent a lot of days and hours at YRS in much less than what he had on, he didn’t want any part of himself uncovered. “Ry, something long sleeved,” he asked, as he looked over toward the closet. 

Ryan nodded as he let go of the t-shirt he was about to pull out and changed tactics. “Hmmmm. . .” he scanned the row of shirts until his eyes fell on the lone flannel shirt toward the end of the line. _Must be one of Mike’s._ He grabbed it from the hanger and walked back to the bed, holding the red and black flannel out. 

Mike felt his heart soften as Chester took his flannel shirt without looking up and slowly slid his arms inside. It was strange to see his shirt on his boyfriend when he’d teased him relentlessly since they’d met about his poor fashion taste. No matter how many times Mike had told him flannel was supposed to be comforting, not fashionable, Chester had never changed his mind about Mike’s shirt material of choice. Now he was wearing Mike’s shirt like a hug, and Mike looked over at Ryan and smiled. 

“Is that better, babe?” he asked softly, his fingers going out to smooth the front of the shirt against Chester’s skin. 

Chester nodded as he took Mike’s hand, squeezing it. “It’s warm, like you.” He smiled up at his boyfriend before he stood up. “I’m alright,” he assured them both, even as he kept Mike’s hand in his own. “Let’s just get out of here, like Jason said to.” 

Ryan nodded as he spun around toward the door. “You guys stay here for a sec, let me check the hallway out first.” He glanced over his shoulder at the couple before he opened the door and looked out. It was quiet as he stood perfectly still, his eyes darting down and then back up the hallway. He could see Mark and Jason’s room at the end, and he glared at it as the thought that his lover was trapped with Mark behind that door hit him. _He knows what he’s doing. He’s okay. He texted me. I’ll text him when we get downstairs. Something lame, but with secret meaning, just in case Mark sees it._

He turned back into the room. “It’s okay,” he told them as he opened the door fully and stepped out of the room. 

“Come on,” Mike said softly, tugging at Chester’s hand. “I’ve got an idea, we’ll go sit at the dining table, okay? You can have a muffin, and we’ll stay close to where Brad is. Mark won’t do anything with Brad around, right?” He hoped his voice was smooth despite the turmoil he was feeling inside. He had no idea what to expect from Mark for the rest of the day, or what he should be ready for. All he knew is they couldn’t leave, it was a contracted weekend. _Fuck these contracts. Surely Chester can walk away without being in breach of contract if Mark is pushing him around. Or worse. I wish I could talk to my dad about it._ He quickly shoved away that thought, that longing for his dad’s guidance, away. It wouldn’t do any good to think about that now. 

Chester wasn’t sure if he’d agreed to Mike’s plan or not, but they were going. They headed down the hallway and then they were back in the dining room. Chester put his elbows on the table, the long sleeves of the flannel falling away from his flame tattoos as he held his head. “I don’t know how he does it,” he mumbled as Mike sat next to him, and Ryan across the table. “He makes it, like, I have to and I know I don’t. I just freeze when I get in front of him. I’m worthless.” 

Ryan went to say something, to boost Chester back up to where he needed to be, but he stopped when he saw Mike flash him a look. Instead he crossed his arms on the table, and waited. He knew it wasn’t his place to put Chester back together anymore, but it was hard to stay completely out of it after all these years. 

“You’re not worthless,” Mike defended immediately, his arm going over Chester’s shoulders. “Mark is fucking crazy, he’s the one that’s worthless.” His eyes flashed toward the living room quickly, making sure he wasn’t going to be overheard by their boss. “Don’t listen to anything he says, Ches. You’re amazing. You’re everything to me. Don’t let him in your head like that.” He dropped a kiss on the top of Chester’s head as he squeezed his shoulder. “It doesn’t matter what he says, he’s wrong. I don’t believe any of it and neither should you.” 

Ryan watched as Chester agreed, even though he knew this wouldn’t be the last time something would happen. Mike was right about Mark being crazy, and Jason’s face popped into Ryan’s mind immediately. He pulled his phone back out and pulled up Jason’s last text. 

**9:01 am** _Did what you said. Are we still working today?_

Ryan paused, reading over his words. Texting with Jason was hard, especially when he knew there was a possibility that Mark would see it. He reread his message one more time before he hit send and leaned forward, cupping his phone in both his hands. “Chaz, you want some water or juice? Mike? I’ll get us all something,” he offered as he stood up. 

Mike didn’t look up, his cheek resting on the top of Chester’s head as he said, “I’ll take some water. And if you’re going in the kitchen, can you ask Brad if he knows where any markers are? Or colored pencils, or something? And paper. I want some paper.” He knew he was taking advantage of Ryan’s offer but he wanted more than the few seconds alone that fetching water would provide.

“Yeah, sure,” Ryan agreed easily before he straightened up with thought. “Actually, I think we have all that stuff in the costume and prop room, for when we do classroom scenes,” he said, pointing at Chester for a second. “I’ll go look.” He turned and headed down the hallway first, figuring he’d go look for the art supplies and then he’d get their drinks. He glanced at his phone just as it lit up in his hand. 

**9:05 am** _So far work is still on. Mark’s sleeping again. I’ll be down in a bit._

Ryan had stopped in the middle of the hallway, one hand on his chest as he read Jason’s text, and he let out a sigh of relief. _He’s okay. He’s texting me. He’s okay._ He wanted to write him back and say something cheesy like ‘I can’t wait’ but he knew he couldn’t. Instead he pocketed his phone and headed for the closed door of the costume and prop room up ahead.

Mike had looked up to see Ryan disappear, then turned his face back into Chester’s hair. “Ches… I’m sorry I left you alone. I didn’t realize how long you’d been gone, I was sitting here eating muffins and just wasn’t thinking. It’s my fault. But it won’t happen again. You’re not going anywhere in this house without me,” he said, his voice strong with resolve. “I love you. And I don’t believe any of what he says, Ches, none of it.” 

Chester leaned against his boyfriend’s side, sucking in his warmth. “It’s not your fault, Sexy Boy. I should be able to stand up for myself, I just. . .anyone else I’d knee in the nuts for trying to. . .I don’t know,” he mumbled in frustration before he took a deep breath. “I love you, too.” 

“It’s going to be okay,” Mike whispered, even though he was less sure of that than he’d been before the morning’s incident. _Mark could have easily taken me out if he wanted to. And then what? Who would be there for Chester then? I’ve got to be more careful. Smarter. I’ve got to control my mouth around him._ Mike leaned back to look at Chester’s profile, his drooping lips and downcast eyes. “I promise I’ll do everything I can,” he said, not wanting to admit how his promises had changed from knowing he could protect his boyfriend to hoping he could. 

“Before it happened, he said he wanted me to talk to you,” Chester admitted before he dared to look over at his lover, catching sight of his dark eyes for a moment. “He said. . .he said you can’t talk back to him like that in front of everyone, and, Mike, he’s right about that.” 

It was Mike’s turn to sigh in frustration. “Is that what started all this? My mouth? Amir talks to him the same way,” he whined, looking at the seat Amir had been sitting in earlier. “Mark just fucking hates me. Just like Amir said.” 

Chester sat back in his seat as he shook his head. “Amir talks like that to everyone, though. That’s, like, his thing. Mike, Amir starred in an entire series about slutty guys who like to talk sass,” he explained, pointing to the empty seat where Amir had been. “It actually did really well,” he added before he dismissed himself. “And, he, Mark, I mean, he doesn’t hate you. Hate’s a strong word. He just needs you to be less confrontational.” 

“I’m not confrontational,” Mike argued, looking at Chester with feigned innocence. “I wasn’t going to just sit here and let him imply that you were cheating on me, Chester. That’s not fair. Everyone here knows that’s not true, Mark was just saying it out of spite. Just to piss me off.” Mike sat back in his chair, too, and crossed his arms over his chest. “I think he deliberately tries to get to me to argue with him. I think he thinks it will give him an excuse to just do whatever he wants with us,” he said, lowering his voice. “It’s like he’s waiting for me to screw up.” 

“Well, I don’t know about all that,” Chester remarked. “He needs us to do well and to get along he just, he’s not used to people who talk back. And Amir doesn’t really count. Mark doesn’t take him serious,” he stated with a shrug before he leaned his head close to Mike’s ear. “We just gotta make it through the next two years. You know? The less trouble we make, then. . . the easier it’s going to be.” 

“I’m not trying to make trouble,” Mike said tiredly. It seemed impossible that it was only nine in the morning. “I’ll do better,” he added, knowing it was what Chester needed to hear. “Here,” he whispered, hooking a finger around Chester’s chin and turning his lips closer, sinking his own down over them. The comforting moment didn’t last long, as Ryan came back in the dining room, paper in one hand and a box full of markers in the other, and Mike pulled away from the kiss, touching his nose to Chester’s quickly before he looked at the other man.

“Hey, you found some. Thanks.” 

“Yeah, this is all we had in the prop room. I think Brad might have more somewhere if you want something different,” he offered before he swung toward the kitchen. “You guys want coffee? Chaz? Coffee?” 

Chester nodded and so did Mike, and Ryan headed through the doorway. He knew from Jason’s text that there would be no filming for at least the morning, which meant there was plenty of time for coffee. Besides, they’d all been called into YRS early, and it was way past time for the caffeinated brew. 

Mike dug through the box of markers and pulled out a black sharpie. He looked at Chester, who had crossed his arms on the table and had laid his head on them, watching, and smiled softly at him. “This is for you,” he whispered as he started drawing an outline on the paper in front of him. _He’s okay. We’re okay. I walked in before anything happened. But what if I’d had another muffin?_ Mike scrunched his nose in thought as he drew bubbles and seaweed. _What if I’d walked in and… what if I couldn’t get Mark away from him? It winded me when he threw me into the wall. I can’t tell Ches I’m scared of what might happen… but I am. We can’t be alone in this house, ever. No matter what we have to stay together. But that might not even be enough to protect us._ Mike kept his attention on his outline, biting down on his bottom lip as he thought over the last hour and Mark.

_I started it. If I hadn’t pushed him, maybe he wouldn’t have pushed me back. Except that he’d already hit Chester, I just didn’t know it._ Mike slid his eyes over to Chester, who was still watching him, eyes on Mike’s face instead of the paper. He felt his skin flush slightly under his boyfriend’s stare and looked back at his drawing. It looked good. And it was exactly what Chester needed. He slid the paper over and touched his fingertip gently to Chester’s nose. “Ches? Here. Color.” He pushed the markers over so that they were between the two of them, then started to draw another outline on the next sheet of paper. 

Chester looked down at the outline of an octopus surrounded by seaweed and bubbles, and he slowly sat up. He pulled the cuffs of his flannel shirt over his hands as he looked from the octopus over to the chicken that Mike was drawing next. “We’re coloring?” he asked, not bothering to fake excitement. He hadn’t colored anything since he was kid, and he hadn’t been much into it then either. 

“Yeah,” Mike answered, a lightness in his voice. “Just go with it.” He nudged Chester with his elbow. “C’mon. Color it for me. How about… pink? With purple spots?” He didn’t look up from putting claws on his chicken to see Chester’s face, and if he was going to play along. 

Silence sat between them for a minute as Chester watched Mike draw before he reluctantly dug through the box of markers to find a pink one. “Fine,” he muttered as he pulled the cap off and slowly started to add color to the simple drawing. What he really wanted was to go home. He wanted to take a shower and crawl into bed and sleep, but he knew that wasn’t possible. For now he was at work, and that meant being ready and available. He pressed his marker down a little harder here and there to make lighter and dark shades of pink as he went, which was somewhat amusing as he stayed close to the thick black line Mike had set for him. 

Mike slid the finished chicken across the table and started the outline of a turtle with a patchwork shell, cutting his eyes over every once in a while to see Chester’s progress. _I know he thinks this is stupid, but it’s good. Mind clearing. It always works for me. Maybe it will work for him too._ He looked down and assessed the scale of the drawing for a minute before he added feet. _I wish we could just go home. And never come back. I wish I could take him away and keep him somewhere, away from Mark, and draw pictures and paint and make bacon and never look back at this place._

He frowned and twirled his marker between his fingers. Drawing wasn’t clearing his mind the way he was accustomed to, not this time. Every thought came back to how he could get Chester away from YRS, and nothing seemed to be promising. _Even if we left from here, Mark owns our place. We’d never be safe there._

Ryan pushed Brad’s silver serving cart with the squeaky wheel into the dining room. It was harder to push than he thought it would be, and he made a mental note to say something to Brad about how he supported the idea of a new one. “I brought the pot,” he announced as he looked over at the table while he waved his hand over the tall carafe before he stopped. “What are you guys doing?” He stepped over and picked up the picture of the chicken Mike had drawn. 

“Coloring,” Mike said simply, sliding his turtle outline to the center of the table and selecting another sheet of paper to draw on. “It’s calming. You should try it.” He waved his hand toward the markers in the box before he stuck the tip of his tongue between his teeth and started work on a seahorse.

Ryan’s deep blue eyes bounced from Mike’s black marker over to where Chester was working on his pink octopus. “Well, is that one a seahorse?” he asked, pointing at Mike’s work in progress. “Can I color that one?” 

“Sure,” Mike answered without really looking at either Chester or Ryan. “If you want something different, I can draw that too.” But nobody said anything else as Ryan poured coffee and Chester colored, and Mike finished the seahorse. _We couldn’t just go home. We’d have to leave, somewhere that Mark couldn’t find us. But where could we go that he won’t follow?_

Mike looked up to see Ryan slide a coffee cup in front of him. “Thanks.” He put down his marker and looked at Chester. “Babe? You need cream and sugar. You want me to put it in for you?” 

Chester looked up and his focus went right to Mike’s concerned face. “Okay,” he answered, before he shook his head. “I mean, yes, please.” He let his marker fall to the table as he put his head in his hands for a second, rubbing his temples. He never wanted Mike to know so much about YRS. He never wanted him to see what he’d seen. _The longer Mike’s here, the worse it’s going to get with Mark. I just know it. What’s Mark going to do next? Mike’s going to get hurt trying to protect me, and it will be my fault._ He looked up just in time to see Ryan sitting down next to him with the picture of the seahorse. 

“Bet I can color better than you,” Ryan teased lightly as he reached for a blue marker. “This is cool, Mike,” he said, leaning forward to look around Chester. “Reminds me of the ocean.” 

Mike watched the coffee in Chester’s cup turn a carmelish color as he stirred in the sugar and cream, and slid it next to Chester’s octopus. “I’ll draw a whole ocean full of things if it will make you smile,” he said, poking Chester’s forearm. “What do you want next, Ches? Anything you want, tell me.” He wanted his boyfriend to smile more than anything in the world at the moment, and the coffee hadn’t seemed to do the trick, and neither had the octopus with its sassy eyes. 

Chester shook his head as he took a sip of coffee and slowly picked his pink marker back up. “This is fine, Mike. It will take me all morning to finish just this one.” He glanced over at Ryan’s seahorse, and then at the turtle and chicken Mike had left on the table just as Amir walked in the room. 

_Amir will for sure think this is stupid._ Mike let out a frustrated sigh as he realized Chester wasn’t going to say anything else. _We have to get out of here. Maybe… maybe I can call Dad. If nothing else, we can hide behind just the idea of my parents for a while. Maybe it would be enough to stop Mark. Maybe if we just left for Colorado, I wouldn’t have to do anything but threaten Mark with my dad. Maybe he’d leave us alone then._ He watched Amir take the seat across from Ryan and look over at Mike’s drawings with cool detachment.

“What’s this? Flashback to kindergarten class today instead of porn? Reminding us all of simpler times, Mikey?” Amir flipped his bangs back as he reached for the coffee pot to pour himself a cup. “Ry? What’s Jay said? We working today or not?” 

Ryan was putting a blue pattern on his seahorse as he glanced up at Amir before he put his head back down. “He said Mark’s asleep, so if we do, it won’t be till later.” He stopped and picked up his coffee cup. “What? You too good to color with us?” he asked, flashing his partner a funky smile before he sipped his coffee. 

Amir shrugged, obviously trying to look disinterested in what was happening at the table. “I don’t see anything I want to color,” he said. “Chicken and turtles don’t do it for me.” He pointed at Ryan’s seahorse and smirked. “That seahorse, though, he’s kinda sexy.” 

Mike looked up, ready to protest, but bit his tongue instead. _Sexy. He’s so fucking weird. Seahorses aren’t sexy._ “Well, what other creatures do you find sexy, Amir? I’ll draw you whatever you want.” 

“A viper,” Amir said, his lips twisted into a bit of a smile as he looked at Mike. “Something that _bites._ ” 

“Vipers don’t live in the ocean,” Mike grumbled, but he started to draw the snake anyway. _Everyone here is fucked up._

“A viper,” Ryan said with a hard eye roll. “What a surprise. You just like vipers because they’re as slimy as you,” he smirked before he nudged Chester’s arm. “Right, Chaz? He kind of embodies the qualities of a snake.” 

Chester looked up just in time to see Amir looking offended. “I agree,” he chuckled, his lips parting to a smile. “I think Mike’s drawings are bringing out your true nature.” 

“His nature is on his belly!” Ryan hooted, slapping the table, and Chester rolled with laughter right beside him. 

“Whatever,” Amir said cooly, watching Mike shade the space under the snake with cross-hatching. “Just give me the damn snake,” he said, holding his hand out impatiently. “At least my snake isn’t floating around with a shit ton of baby seahorses wanting its attention. My viper is independent as fuck.” He dug around in the box of markers, looking for purple. 

“Mhm,” Ryan said between a laugh. “My seahorse is a good dad. Nothing wrong with kids depending on their dad,” he stated just as Devon poked his head around the corner. 

He looked from Mike, to the others sitting around coloring, and having what seemed to be a rather lighthearted conversation. “What are you guys up to?” he asked as he stepped in, and a second later, Caleb was right behind him. Devon picked up the picture of the chicken. “My dad used to raise chickens. Show chickens,” he clarified as he looked around the table, and how everyone seemed to be in heavy coloring mode. “You know, they’re fancy or whatever. He used to take them to shows. Like, dog shows only for chickens.” He pulled the chair out and sat down, and Caleb followed, sitting between him and Amir. 

“Join in,” Ryan offered without looking up. “None of us are working till at least this afternoon, so Mike’s drawing, and we’re coloring and mine is going to look the best,” he decided as he looked up and around the table to see where everyone else’s progress was. 

Mike kept his head down, working his way quickly through several more outlines. _If this was all we did, sit around and color, these guys really wouldn’t be so bad. If every one of them hadn’t been with my boyfriend, I might be able to tolerate them. Maybe._ He shook his head and tried to make his darker thoughts go away. _It doesn’t matter. It doesn’t matter if they’re nice guys. I still want to take Chester away from here. I have to figure it out. I have to. There’s no way to know how bad it could get next time. I don’t want there to be a next time._

“Ches?” Mike leaned over and whispered in his boyfriend’s ear. “I love you. I just want you to be okay.”

Chester turned his head just enough to see the side of his lover’s face. “Mike, I’m fine,” he whispered. “I’m a professional. I can handle what I need to.” He put his head back down as he colored the pink down into one of the octopus’ tentacles. _I don’t want to worry him. I’m fine. I’ve always been fine, and I’ll keep being fine._

Before Mike could really protest, insist that he knew Chester wasn’t okay, he caught sight of Jason crossing the living space and heading toward the dining room. He sat back, sliding his arm over the back of Chester’s chair quietly as Jason entered the room.

There was no need to pull Chester close, to try to protect him, though. Jason’s shoulders were slumped forward as he stopped and looked around the table at everyone. _I just want to fall into Ry’s arms and never get up. I just want a hug and I can’t even get that. I just want to disappear from here forever._ His eyes met Ryan’s as his lover looked up, and he caught the reassuring smile on his face before he looked back down at whatever he was coloring. _Coloring. Like a bunch of kids. I guess maybe sometimes they still act like kids._

Jason cleared his throat, and felt everyone’s eyes on him instantly. “Chaz? Mike? I need to see you for a minute,” he said, motioning out toward the living room. He saw Ryan move to stand up too, and he nodded his head. “You, too.” He motioned at Ryan with his hand before he turned around. 

Chester dropped his marker and stood up. He shoved his chair in before he followed Ryan out the door. Meetings with Jason after an incident were normal. He figured it would be the usual damage control, which he knew was for Mike’s sake more than for him and Ryan. Unlike Mike, he and Ryan had been around long enough to know the drill. Jason would apologize, then make some excuse for Mark’s behavior, then he’d be all business again, laying out the plan for the rest of the day. None of it meant anything.

Mike capped his marker and followed closely behind his boyfriend, his hand on Chester’s back. Even though he’d been around Jason away from YRS, he knew better than to open his mouth right now to ask what was going on. Whatever was happening, Jason would be the one to open the conversation, not him. He looked toward the stairs but there was still no sign of Mark. _Ryan said he was sleeping. I guess that’s a good thing._

“You okay, Chaz?” Jason asked, his voice low, taking in his employees downturned face and distant expression. _Fucking Mark. He doesn’t even know what he’s doing when he’s drinking._

Chester’s hand went to his cheek as he looked up, but he dropped it away a second later. “I’m fine,” he answered. “Nothing major.” He looked away from his boss and toward the stairs, his eyes traveling upwards for a second as a chill shot through him. He really didn’t want to see Mark later, even though he knew that was coming. 

Jason followed Chester’s gaze before he looked back over at Mike and then at Ryan. “Good. Well, Mark’s… you know… he’ll be out for a while. Probably until the afternoon.” He swallowed before he went on. “Mike, I… well, all I can say is, Mark had too much to drink this morning, as you know. And, well, once he wakes up, he won’t remember much. It’s in your best interest… Chaz’s best interest… if you just act like nothing happened. Just do your shoot and do what he wants.” Jason blew out a breath as he ran a hand over the top of his hair. He just needed Mike to agree so he could pull Ryan off alone for a few minutes. It was the perfect opportunity with Mark passed out upstairs.

Mike looked at Jason and he could feel the frustration building all over again as nobody said anything else. They were all understanding something that he didn’t, he could feel it in the air between them. “What do you mean, he won’t remember. He won’t remember how he tried to invalidate his contract with Chester, or that he shoved me into the wall? I saw him, he didn’t have that much to drink. Two screwdrivers isn’t all it takes for memory loss.” Mike looked at Chester, who was avoiding his eyes, and then at Ryan. He could tell there was something not being said. 

The silence between the four of them lasted just long enough for Jason to make up his mind, and he looked Mike straight in the eyes as he said flatly, “it’s not the alcohol. It’s the fucking pills he takes. He won’t remember anything when he wakes up. That’s always his excuse. Do something unforgivable and then pop a few, pass out for a while, and wake up contrite. It’s how it goes. And there’s hell to pay if I’m not there when he wakes up.” He looked over at Ryan and wished he could say more, but the look in Ryan’s blue eyes stopped him. 

“It’s just the way it is,” Chester said, turning to face his boyfriend for the first time. “It makes it easier. . .for all of us. Then we don’t have to deal with it.” He feathered his hand down Mike’s arm, mentally pleading with him to understand and not make a big deal about it. 

Against his better judgement, Mike pressed his lips together and said nothing. He knew anything he said would just make things worse at this point, and all he wanted to do was make Chester feel better. He covered Chester’s wandering hand with his free one and squeezed his fingers tightly.

“You two should go back, finish your coffee, find something to do for a few hours,” Jason suggested. “I’m going to go pull some footage in the workroom, try to get a little bit done before I have to go back upstairs.” He looked meaningfully at Ryan and then down the hallway before he looked back at Mike. “Chaz is right. It’s just easier if you go with it. I’ll let you know if it’s going to be you two first this afternoon, or Ryan and Amir. We might only have time for one today, so everyone needs to be prepared to stay late - or an extra night - tomorrow.” He turned on his heel and left them all standing in the middle of the living room, Ryan looking after him and Chester and Mike at each other. 

“What do you want to do now, Ches?” Mike asked, his hand still over Chester’s. _Coloring didn’t work. Maybe there’s something else. Maybe we can go outside. Or go lay down. Something that’s just the two of us._

Chester stared at the polished white marble floors before he mumbled. “I want to go to sleep. You can finish drawing, if you want,” he offered, as he looked up to meet Mike’s eyes. “I know you like it.” 

“If you’re going to sleep, I’m going with you,” Mike said firmly, leaving no room for argument. “I don’t need to draw anymore. Come on, I’m right behind you.” He turned to head for the stairs, and looked at Ryan. “Be careful,” he said, his voice low. “I saw that look he gave you.” Despite everything, he didn’t want Jason and Ryan to get caught. Not today. 

Ryan nodded before he gave Mike a half smile. “We’re always careful. Take care of him,” he whispered as he leaned a little closer. “Mark really got to him this time.” He patted Mike on the shoulder quickly before he spun around and headed in the direction Jason had gone, ready to catch up with his lover and take full advantage of the few moments of privacy they would have together. Simple kisses and pulling Jason into his arms was top of his list as his walk turned into a sprint. 

“Come on, babe.” Mike whispered this time, gently pulling Chester close. “I’ve got you. I’m with you. I’m not going to leave you alone.” Chester didn’t say anything as Mike steered him toward the stairs and toward their bedroom. _We’ll get a nap, and things will be better when we wake up. Maybe I’ll figure out what to do about all this mess, too. Maybe I’ll figure out how to get us out of here._

****  
TBC


	33. Given Up

Mike leaned his forehead against the window as he fretted. Two weekends had passed since the incident at YRS, since Mark had cornered Chester alone in their room and forced him to his knees, and Mike felt the change in his boyfriend. Chester wasn’t as talkative at work. He kept his eyes down and his body close to Mike’s side, and in their shoots he was overly subservient and distant. _I’ve tried, and he doesn’t want to talk about it. And he’s fine here, until we have to go back. And then he’s quiet again. And nothing I do or say is helping. He told me I was hovering. I’m not hovering. I’m just worried._

The sound of Chester’s key turning in the lock was final, and Mike didn’t move from the window where he was staring out at the early morning haze blankly. _It’s good. We should spend time apart, right? He’s right, I know he’s right. But why does everything feel so wrong?_

He blew out a breath that fogged the window with his frustration, and dropped his eyes to the sidewalk below. Any minute now he would see Chester’s carefully spiked mohawk as he walked out to the car, on his way to his mother’s and leaving Mike behind. _Maybe I am hovering. I need to practice. I should take advantage of him being gone most of the day. He’ll be at his mom’s and then karate this afternoon. Karate is good for him. He needs that, that confidence that he really could protect himself if he needed to. If he just didn’t freeze around Mark. Fuck Mark. I hate that guy._

The options were painting or practicing, and neither sounded particularly appealing at the moment. Mike looked over at the spotless kitchen, then turned to look over the loft. Everything was neat and orderly, controlled. Chester was almost militant when it came to their home. Everything had a space and everything needed to be clean, and Mike had learned early on when Chester was cleaning to stay out of the way, especially in the kitchen. There was a load of bath towels he could wash, but that was really it in terms of chores that needed to be done. Together they managed to keep things pretty tight at home.

Mike flipped on the lights in the bathroom and went for the hamper, gathering up the towels to take to the washer. Chester’s gel was sitting on the vanity, and he frowned as he popped open a drawer and put it away. _He must have really been in a hurry to get out of here this morning. He never leaves things out._

Once the towels were in the wash and he’d made another restless pass through the downstairs, Mike wandered back into the kitchen to put the kettle on for coffee before he settled down at the piano. He was only part of the way through his warmup routine when there was a light knock at the front door. 

_I’m not expecting anyone. I’m meeting Anna later, but she wouldn’t come here now._ Mike heard the water boiling in the kettle as he made his way to the door, ready to turn away whoever wanted to bother his alone time. He wasn’t expecting to see Jason on the other side of the door.

“Hey, Mike.” Jason stood in front of him, both hands stuffed into the lightweight black jacket he was wearing. “I… well, I was out and thought I’d stop by and make sure everything is okay here.” He peeked around Mike uncertainly, looking over the spotless loft he and Mark owned. “You know… anything needing repair or anything? One of us usually comes by every quarter or so, just to check on things.”

Mike looked at his boss and cocked his head to the side. “Um… yeah, I think everything is fine. We had an issue with the hot water a few weeks ago but apparently it was the whole building, and it got fixed the same day. Chester said we didn’t even need to tell you.” His expression dropped into a worried frown and he said, “I figured he knew if we needed to, I’m sorry that we didn’t.”

“No, no, it’s fine,” Jason rushed to say, pulling one of his hands out of his pocket to wave off Mike’s concern. Neither of them said anything for a minute, and Jason was about to turn to go. He wasn’t exactly sure why he’d come here, and Mike was looking at him with a mixture of confusion and concern.

_He looks rough,_ Mike thought as he looked at Jason’s tired face. _He… he looks the same way Chester’s been looking. Tired. Defeated._ Without much more thought, Mike stepped to the side, making a wider space between him and the door frame. “You, uh, you wanna come in? I was just making coffee… you look like you could use a cup.”

Jason hesitated before he caught Mike’s dark eyes. Something about the earnestness, the innocence in Mike’s offer, melted away his reservations, and he realized the invitation was exactly what he’d been seeking. He just wanted to be somewhere that wasn’t YRS. Somewhere that Mark wasn’t, that he could hide away for a little while, but with a good excuse if Mark came looking for him. The loft fit that criteria perfectly. “Sure, Mike. That actually sounds really good. I heard you practicing though, you sure I’m not interrupting?”

It was Mike’s turn to wave off the question. “I wasn’t really feeling it anyway. Ches went to his mom’s and I was just trying to find something to fill the time.” He let Jason step inside and closed the door behind him. “It’s kinda weird to be without him. Ever since we started working together, it’s like we don’t ever spend any time apart. He said it would be good to have some space today, but it just feels lonely. I don’t know.” Mike pressed his lips together to shut himself up. _God, Mike, he doesn’t need to know every thought in your head._

Mike’s babbling didn’t even seem to register as Jason tossed his jacket onto the couch. “Of all the boys Mark could let live here, I’m glad it’s you two. You keep the space so clean.” He looked up and assessed the artwork on the wall. “Wow, Mike, did you paint that?” 

Jason was pointing at the painting Mike had made while Chester was in Hawaii. “Oh! Yeah, that was… before... “ He stopped to look at the abstract beach he’d created for Chester, a little pang of longing for the simpler state of their relationship at that time hitting him. “It was before I knew what he did for a living,” Mike finished quietly, then turned toward the kitchen for the coffee.

The blues and browns, the cream colors Mike had painted worked perfectly together in the painting, and Jason stepped closer to admire it. “It’s really beautiful work,” he said, a little awed. _There’s no fucking reason for this kid to be at YRS. None of the other boys have a tenth of the talent he has, and he’s thrown it all away for Chester. Their relationship must really be something._ He knew better than to reach out and touch the painting, but he wanted to.

“Thanks,” Mike called with his back to Jason. “Do you take cream? Sugar?” He busied himself pouring the water over the coffee grounds, preparing the coffee the way Chester liked it. The way they had time for during the week but never on the weekends, when they had to settle for Brad’s giant pot of coffee or picking it up from the coffee shop on the way to work.

“Just black,” Jason answered, turning toward the kitchen and scanning over Mike’s workspace and keyboard before looking at the back of Mike’s head. His hair was flat and soft, free from product, the blue tint fading out of the black strands like it had been a while since he’d had it dyed. 

“I’ll bring it in there,” Mike said before Jason could suggest anything else. He turned around to see Jason nodding, and taking a seat on the couch. _He’s sitting in my spot. I guess I’ll sit in Chester’s._ He tried to smooth the annoyance off his face as he carried both cups into the living space. “I like mine black, too. Chester… well, you know him. It’s mostly cream and sugar, with a little coffee flavoring.” Mike chuckled softly as he sat down, moving the throw pillow Chester usually sat on behind his back after he handed Jason his cup.

They didn’t say anything else for a few minutes, both of them gently blowing over the tops of their cups, until Jason finally quirked an eyebrow Mike’s way. “Not only do we both drink it black, neither of us can apparently drink it right after it’s made.”

“Too hot,” Mike agreed before he tested his coffee. “It always takes a few minutes to cool to just the right temperature.” He wasn’t sure what was up, but Jason almost looked like he wanted to talk. _I don’t know if I should say something or not. I mean, is this like work? Or is this like… just hanging out? Can I just hang out with Jason? That’s weird. I should wait for him to say something._ Mike took another long sip of his coffee, his eyes fixed on the coffee table. It was almost awkward between them, but not quite. 

“How’s he doing?” Jason asked finally, his gaze on the top of his coffee cup. “At home, I mean. I can tell he’s off at work…” He didn’t want to say more, knowing Mike’s penchant for privacy. He and Ryan talked about it frequently though, in stolen moments when they weren’t pressed against a bedroom door or hidden away in the workroom. Ryan was worried, and deep down, Jason was, too. Whatever had happened between Mark, Chester, and Mike before they’d interrupted a few weeks ago had messed with Chester’s head, that much was obvious.

Mike’s eyes flicked up toward the lofted bedroom as though Chester were up there merely sleeping, and he shrugged his shoulders. “I think he’s okay. At least he is here. He’s always quiet when we get home Sunday, but by Monday it’s better, and he’s himself until it’s time to go back.” Mike looked at Jason, who was still staring down at his drink. “He tells me he’s okay, but it’s not like it used to be. I know he’s just telling me that so that I don’t worry. But I do.” 

Without really thinking about it, Jason blurted out, “Ry says the same thing.” 

They both sat frozen then, Jason wondering if he really wanted to open up that topic of conversation, Mike wondering if he should say anything at all. He still wasn’t sure what had dragged Jason to his door, and his gut reaction was to play it safe. He held his tongue and looked over at his painting, waiting, occasionally sipping at his coffee.

There was another minute or two of silence and then Jason mumbled, “coffee is good. Thanks. I… I just needed to get out of that house for a little while. And there’s not a whole lot of places I can go. Places that Mark wouldn’t question.” He looked up and caught Mike’s wide eyes staring at him, and he couldn’t help the small laugh that escaped. “What? Are you really surprised that I hate him as much as all the rest of you?” 

“No,” Mike answered honestly, his tone unapologetic. “I’ve been trying to figure out why you stay. Ever since I found out about you and Ryan. I asked Chester and he said something about lawyers and such, but… I don’t know. I don’t know how you can stand to be in the same room with Mark when he’s-” Mike stopped suddenly, his cheeks flushing in embarrassment. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t-”

“No, no, it’s okay,” Jason interrupted. “He’s an asshole, Mike, and yeah, he tries to act like what he does with the boys he does with my approval, but I, I never agreed to an open marriage. He says that around the house like we have an understanding, but that’s never how it was. It’s not how I imagined things would be between us.” 

He sat his cup on the coffee table and turned toward Mike, words falling from his lips when he realized he had Mike’s full attention. “I hate what he does. I hate standing by and watching it happen and turning my head the other way like it’s not demoralizing and degrading. I used to just not think about it, and then, when Ry and I… God, I don’t know why I’m talking to you about this.” Jason stood up suddenly, his eyes showing a bit of panic as he reached for his jacket. “I shouldn’t. I should go, I’m sorry Mike, I-”

“It’s okay.” Mike looked up at his boss, at the frantic look on his face. “You don’t have to go.” His face was twisted into an uncertain frown, and he glanced at Jason’s coffee cup. “At least finish your coffee. You’ll feel better. Whatever is on your mind, it’s easier to sort once you’ve had a cup. It’s fine,” he said again, though he wasn’t sure if he was trying to convince Jason or himself more.

_I should leave. But there’s nowhere else to go. And certainly nobody else to talk to. And Ryan says all Chaz does is talk about how caring and kind Mike is… maybe it won’t hurt to talk to him._ Jason slowly sat back down and picked his cup up again. It was still warm around his fingers. “I’m sorry, Mike. I’ve been wanting to say that to you for a while now, but there’s not been a good opportunity.” 

“Sorry? For what?” Mike’s eyebrows drew together in thought as he tried to figure out why Jason was apologizing. 

“The contract. For what I said to get you to sign on. I know you hate what we do. I hate it too, now, actually. And I’m sorry that I dragged you in. I knew once I told you about Mark, you’d be in, and he wanted you.” Jason hung his head in shame as he confessed. “Ryan told me that Chaz hadn’t told you about Mark, the things he did, and he told me how you… well, how your relationship was with Chaz and I knew, I knew that if you were in love, you’d want Mark out of the picture. You’re so right, I understand you. I’d do anything to keep Ryan out of Mark’s hands. But I can’t do anything. And I dragged you into it and I’m sorry. We would have all suffered that weekend if I’d let you walk out the door without signing. Mark wanted you because he knew he’d lose Chaz if he didn’t get you in there.” 

Mike didn’t know what to say. He sat dumbfounded for a moment as Jason’s words sunk in. _It was that obvious I wanted Chester to quit? We’re both trapped in this hell because I’m that transparent? I could have gotten him out. We could have walked away but I let Jason manipulate me._ He huffed out an angry breath and looked Jason square in the eyes. “I can see it in your eyes when you look at me and Ches. The guilt. And you should feel guilty. You know what it’s like to love someone and want to keep them safe, don’t you. You know exactly why I signed that contract and you used that knowledge to your advantage.”

“And I’m trying to tell you now, I’m sorry. I knew it was wrong but… do you see it at all, Mike? I’m just like you. Like everyone there. Trapped by Mark with no way out. He told me to get you to sign, and nobody goes against Mark. Except you,” he amended, looking at Mike with a hint of admiration. “I’ve never seen anyone stand up to him the way you do.”

“Yeah, and what has it gotten me?” Mike said bitterly. “All I can think about is what happens next time? What happens if I get there too late? Or if things get physical again? I’ll lose,” he whispered, looking away from Jason. “And then what? Then does he just carry Ches off to your room the way he did Ryan? Do I just sit there and wait while he, he, _rapes_ my boyfriend?”

Jason looked down at the floor. He’d never heard anyone at YRS call what Mark did rape. It was coerced, yes, but he’d spent years trying to justify Mark’s actions. The boys were porn stars. They all had sex with each other. Having sex with the boss - that was just part of the scene. But when Mike whispered rape Jason’s blood went cold. Mike was the only one to call it like it was. Mike wasn’t making excuses for Mark, and neither should he.

“I can’t stop him either,” Jason said quietly. “Not with Ryan, any of the boys, not with me…” He kept his eyes on the white shag rug under his feet. “He thinks he’s entitled. That he pays them enough, takes them on vacations and provides for them… he thinks he’s earned their bodies.” He slid his finger around the top of the coffee mug and peeked at Mike. “I was just like you when I came to YRS. Green. I had no idea what I was in for. And Mark, he was charming. Sweet, even. He made me his pet and I was young and dumb about relationships, and I really thought that we were in love. Once he decided he wanted me for himself, it was like a badge of honor. I’d _won_ him. I didn’t have to work in front of the camera anymore, the boss wanted me… we were married and I was miserable before I figured out it was all business driven. I was good with the camera and I made good financial decisions, and it was all just another manipulation to get what he wanted. We weren’t even married two months before he started up with the boys again.”

Mike felt all of the anger sink down to his toes, out of his body, as he looked at Jason. He was hunched over, his hands cupping his elbows, the same way he saw Chester when Mark had been on him about something. In a flash of clarity he realized that Chester had been Mark’s pet before they started dating - and that falling in love with Mike had ended what was happening between the boss and his employee. Because Chester was in love with Mike. 

“I’ve never touched any of them Mike, I’m not like him. Ryan, he pursued me.” Jason ran a hand over his head, but kept his eyes on the floor. “I know that sounds like a cop out, an excuse, but it’s true. And I love him so much it hurts. Not being able to do anything but watch... these _fucking_ contracts he threatens you all with… Ry’s got one more year, and then he’ll be free, and all I can think is, how am I going to get out of there, too? Mark is never going to let me leave. Not without a fight.” He tried to wipe the tears from the corners of his eyes without Mike seeing them, but he clumsily hit the side of his coffee cup, sloshing the liquid around, and Mike didn’t miss anything.

“It sucks,” Mike said softly, fascinated with the emotion he could see on Jason’s face. He’d known that Jason and Ryan were in love, but he hadn’t understood just how closely their situation mirrored his and Chester’s until Jason started talking. _And honestly, he’s got it ten times worse. Married to that monster and totally helpless. Me and Ches are just… me and Ches. Jay’s got to deal with Amir, and Mark, too. And whoever else Mark wants to throw in the mix._ He set his empty cup on the coffee table and scooted over closer to Jason, tentatively putting a hand on his shoulder. “I’m grateful you told me what you did. It sounds stupid to say I’m grateful you got me into YRS, but now… knowing what I know, at least I can be there for Chester. I’m doing everything I can to make it better until I can get us out. And I’m sorry you can’t do the same.” 

Jason felt the gentle pressure of Mike’s hand and he squeezed his eyes tightly. _I’m not going to cry sitting here on their couch. I’m not._ He took a deep breath and started to reach out and pat Mike’s leg, but changed his mind. “I didn’t mean to come over here and dump all this on you, Mike. I don’t even know why I decided to come in the first place. But… maybe we understand each other a little better now. I know you hate all of us, but we’re not all like Mark.”

“I don’t hate all of you,” Mike immediately objected, then closed his mouth. Jason was kind of right. He did hate everyone and everything at YRS, but after this, he could feel his perspective starting to shift a little bit.

Jason looked up, catching Mike’s eyes. “It’s okay. I get it. And I know how much it must have bothered you to have me and Ry here that night. You have no idea, though, what that meant to both of us. Ryan’s always on me about how you and Chaz get to be together in public, and how much he wants that for us… and we got a little bit of that here at your place. My place. Whatever. I’d like to do it again sometime, if you think you can tolerate us.” He shifted a little and felt Mike squeeze his shoulder before his arm dropped away.

“Yeah,” Mike agreed absently. “I know Ches enjoyed it.” He looked down at the floor and then over at the windows. “He’s always trying to get me to see that he and Ryan are just really good friends, and I couldn’t understand it. I couldn’t understand how you could have sex with someone and that be all it was. Nothing emotional. But having you guys over, watching you two together and watching Ches and Ryan together, I kind of understand. I think. It’s still hard for me. Ches is my, he…” Mike trailed off and thought for a moment, before he turned and looked back at Jason. “Doesn’t matter. I’m sure he’d love to cook again. We’ll do it again soon.”

Jason nodded, and Mike watched his features lift a little, like a weight had been taken off his shoulders. “Thanks, Mike.” He reached in his pocket for his phone and was surprised to see a message from Ryan. “Hmm. I didn’t hear this chime, did you?” he asked, inspecting the phone. “Oh. It’s on silent.” Jason rolled his eyes as he read Ryan’s message. His roommate had left for work and that was Jason’s signal to get going. Waving the phone at Mike, he stood up and grabbed his jacket. “Ry’s got a few minutes, I’m going to head out and go see him before I have to get back to YRS.”

“Sure, yeah,” Mike said, standing up from the couch and grabbing both coffee cups to take to the kitchen. He slid them on to the bar top and turned to see Jason pulling on his jacket. “I… well, I feel like I should say, you can trust me. With everything you said. We’re kinda in this together.” He waited, watching Jason carefully.

Without a thought, Jason stepped toward Mike, and before Mike could stop him, gave him a quick hug. “Yeah. We are in this together. I hope we can all get out of it together, too,” he said, heading for the front door. “Let me know if you need anything, Mike. Anything here, or at work. I’ll do what I can.” He paused, his hand on the door handle. “Thanks for the coffee.”

Their eyes met across the room, silently acknowledging that things between them were different now. There was an actual friendship where before, it had only been a boss/employee relationship. Jason let himself out, and Mike stood next to the bar, looking at the closed front door, still wondering how he was going to get Chester out of YRS - especially if his only allies would be gone in just a year. 

****

Chester took in a deep breath, and then let it out slowly, according to Joe’s directions as he stood in line at karate class. He was dressed out, with his black gi tied closely around his body, and his bare feet steady on the mats. His eyes were fixed on the back of the student in front of him as Joe called out the next command, and in unison everyone in the class punched the air as they yelled “Yah!” And then again. “Yah!” And again. “Yah!” 

“Everyone turn!” Joe shouted from the front of the room where he stood with his Master’s belt around his waist and his long black hair pulled back in a tight ponytail. He watched as his students did a 180 degree turn to face the back wall, where his underling instructor took over for a moment. Joe paced up and down the width of the room, watching as his students did roundhouse kicks and yelled their hearts out. A smile settled over him. This was his top class, and they’d come so far. They were disciplined in their moves and behavior and each one of them had the fire, will, and drive to compete, to do the work and show the results. He was proud of them, and he couldn’t wait to take the dozen or so who had risen above the rest to the state competitions in just under a month. 

The co-instructor shouted for the group to turn back to the front, and Chester, along with everyone in the room, did just that. Now he was back to punching. He stared at the karate club’s logo on the back of the gi of the person in front of him as he tried to imagine Mark’s face. _Joe always says to picture someone you can really imagine punching. Mark’s the only one I want to punch. I want to punch his fucking lights out._

His teeth grit as he yelled his “Yah!” louder than before. _I want to punch him every time he looks at me. Every time he touches me. I want to punch him in his ugly ass face every time he orders me to do something. Every time he orders Mike to do something. Every time he looks at Mike!_ “Yah!!” He roared with his last punch just before a wave of uncertainty swept over him.

It was like being tackled by a tidal wave. In the space of three seconds, Chester’s drive and will to keep going went from being on ten, to zero as Mark’s face - the sound of his smooth voice and ghostly, always hungry, gray eyes - flashed into his mind, and Chester dropped his head. _Who am I kidding? I can’t do any of that. It doesn’t matter how many punches or kicks or moves I learn, I crumble in front of him every single time. Every fucking time._

Chester’s hands went to his face as he closed his eyes, as he stood motionless while he listened to his classmates all continue without him. He could hear their screams, and their feet stomping against the mats, and then he heard Joe calling his name. 

He looked up just in time to see the karate Master coming his way. _I can’t._ Chester spun around and quickly dodged around the other students as he headed for the benches at the back of the room. He sat down right next to his duffel bag and started to pull the gloves off his hands, the velcro ripping like a cry of pain. 

“Chester, what happened?” Joe asked as soon as he got to him. The room of students didn’t stop, and their yells were loud, but he was close enough to hear anything Chester needed to say. “Are you okay?” 

“I’m fine,” Chester mumbled as he pulled his bag closer and unzipped it. “I just, I’m not going to do this anymore. I, I’m sorry, Joe.” His eyes flicked up just long enough to see the concern on his friend’s face before he went back to pulling off his gloves. 

“But why? Did something happen?” Joe asked as he turned quickly to see his co-instructor walking his way. He waved his hand at him, and then pointed toward the front, signalling for him to take over before he turned back to his student. “Chester, talk to me. . .is it the class? Someone in the class?” 

Chester shook his head as he dropped both his gloves into his duffel bag. “The class is fine, I just don’t think it’s doing me any good.” 

Joe took a minute as he watched one of his best students sit with his head down and his hands shaking as he dug for his socks in his duffel bag. “Chester. . .” He whispered before he crouched down in front of him. “Talk to me, buddy. . .quitting isn’t like you.”

“There’s nothing to talk about,” Chester said as he looked up, trying his best to hide the emotions zipping through him. “It’s just not for me anymore. I’m sorry, Joe. I hope this doesn’t mess anything up.” He held their eye contact for a second longer before he leaned forward, pulling on his gray sock that had the white toes. “It’s been fun and all, and I appreciate everything I’ve learned,” he added, “but I’ve gotten all I can out of it.” 

Joe watched as Chester moved onto his next sock, and he knew he was running out of time. A few more seconds and Chester would be up and out the door, and he’d probably never see him again. “Is everything okay at home?” he asked gently. Chester wasn’t the first student he’d had in his class that suffered through an emotional breakdown, and Joe recognized what was happening now as exactly that. 

Chester’s eyes shot up, his hands frozen with his sock only half on his foot. “At home? With Mike?” He paused for a second before he nodded quickly. “Of course. Don’t be silly, Joe.” 

“Okay. What about at. . .work? Ches, I know, I know you’ve had trouble with guys getting a little rough in the past,” he stated as gently as he could. Before Mike had come along, Chester had mentioned more than once that not every guy liked to take ‘no’ for an answer. Those comments had disappeared since Mike had moved in and taken over Chester’s love life. But maybe it had never been about guys Chester was going out with. Maybe it was guys from work. 

“I know you’ve never said,” Joe pressed on as he watched Chester go very still, “but if someone at work is pushing boundaries then -”

“It’s not work,” Chester suddenly snapped as he looked up, his piercing quivering right along with his bottom lip. “I’m just done with karate. Don’t worry about me, Joe. I’m fine. I’m always fine,” he insisted as he quickly pulled his sock the rest of the way on and stood up. “Thank you for caring,” he stated like it was a routine response - a rehearsed go-to statement. “I’ll give you a call some time. Good luck with going to the championships.” He grabbed his duffel bag, and with just his socks on his feet he headed for the exit. 

Joe stood up and took a few steps to follow him, but stopped. His shoulders slumped a little as he watched Chester walk out. _He didn’t even look back. Something’s wrong. He’s not one to quit. Not like this. Not in the middle of class. He didn’t even put his shoes on he wanted out of here so fast. I hope he’s okay. . .maybe I’ll check in with Mike. It wouldn’t hurt._

He waited a minute longer, keeping his eyes trained on the exit, but it was clear Chester wasn’t coming back. 

**** 

A hot shower and a cold beer had been the answer to Chester’s nerves after he’d left karate class. He stepped into the empty loft, knowing that Mike would still be out with Anna at least for a little while longer. He hadn’t wasted anytime. He’d tossed his karate stuff into the very back of his closet, making the decision then and there to never take it out again. He grabbed a white t-shirt and a pair of blue jeans that had patches on the knees and hustled down to the shower. He was sweaty from where he’d participated in over half the class, and he knew he smelled. His skin was starting to feel sticky and there was no way he could even think about relaxing until he was clean. 

The beer had happened without much thought afterward and as he sat on the couch in the quiet loft apartment, he sipped his drink and stared blankly at the television where cartoons were playing. His phone dinged, and he looked down to see the next message in his running conversation with Ryan.

**3:22 pm** _Are you going to tell Mike?_

Chester cocked his eyebrow before he took another sip of his beer, tossing the question around in his mind. He squeezed the beer bottle between his legs so he could have both hands to text back. 

**3:25 pm** _Probably. I need to. He’ll be worried, but I don’t want to lie to him. He’s going to read a lot into it._

It was only a second before his phone dinged again and Chester was quick to read Ryan’s reply. 

**3:26 pm** _Yeah, Mike tends to worry. I guess the better question is, are you going to tell him the real reason you quit._

Chester read the message over and over before he sat his phone down for a minute and took another drink. He let his eyes focus on the soundless silly _Tom and Jerry_ cartoon rolling across the tv. He pressed his lips together. _The real reason. Telling him anything else would be a lie. Maybe he’ll understand. He saw how things are._

He picked up his phone to type. 

**3:29 pm** _Yeah, I’m going to tell him. Hopefully he won’t freak. I hate him worrying about me. You know? It’s just pointless, Ry. I mean, what the hell is wrong with me? I used to be able to hold my own with Mark. I used to be able to, like, I. Fuck. I don’t even know._

Chester dropped his head, his fingers still on the digital keys as he thought about how much things had changed. How much _he’d_ changed. Or at least that’s how it felt. He opened his eyes and stared at his text before he hit send. He knew he could say it to Ryan. If there was anyone else in the world who understood, it was him. 

Chester tossed his phone to the cushion beside him as he leaned back, letting his body sink into the soft fabric of the couch. He put his head back, and stared up at the ceiling - at the exposed ductwork and the industrial looking light fixture that was just a few feet above him. The windows were open, and he could hear the faint sound of the ocean in the distance, and as he closed his eyes and took a long intake of air into his nose, he could smell the salty sea air, too. This was where he loved to be. Home. He loved the bright windows and the nearby ocean. He loved his kitchen and the spa-like bathroom, even if it was on the smaller side. He loved his bedroom. _Mine and Mike’s bedroom,_ he mentally corrected himself as he picked his head up and looked back at the television. _I wish we had normal jobs. I wish he was still teaching piano and I. . .I wish I had a job I could talk about. I wish I could just go to work everyday and come home and have weekends off and me and Mike could live here and. . .wishing is for suckers. It doesn’t do any good._

A scowl crossed his face as he gripped his beer bottle a little tighter. He heard his phone ding and he took a long drink before he picked it up to see Ryan’s reply. 

**3:35 pm** _Yeah,I know, Chaz. If you ask me, everything at YRS has been going downhill. Mark’s really starting to cut corners and his dickhead level has gone way up. He used to be tolerable, now he’s just a terror to be around. Even Jay is getting to his breaking point. I swear, the day I quit, I’m going to slug Mark so hard. I’ll slug him for you and me both. And for Jay._

Chester felt himself smile a little as he read Ryan’s words. 

**3:37 pm** _I want to slug him too. And I want another beer. This one is gone._

He shoved his phone into the pocket of his jeans before he stood up, and his head and limbs rushed a little as he did. He took a second, feeling light from the alcohol, before he headed toward the kitchen. He tossed the empty beer bottle into the trash before he opened the refrigerator and grabbed another, along with the package of sliced cheese. He heard his phone ding from his pocket, but he left it until he was sitting back down, his socked feet up on the coffee table, the opened package of sliced cheese in his lap. He took a swallow of beer, letting the ice cold liquid slide down his throat before he leaned forward and sat it on the coffee table. He giggled at the cartoon on the tv as he unwrapped a piece of cheese and bit it in half before he dug his phone out. 

**3:39 pm** _By all means, have another. You deserve it. It’s been a bad few fucking weeks. I’m on my second one already. Jay was here earlier. God, I miss him. I hate only getting to see him on the weekends usually. It’s not fair. I wish we could have our own place like you and Mike._

Chester smiled for a moment as he looked around, but his eyebrows furrowed as he smashed the second half of the piece of cheese in his mouth. He reached for his drink before he texted back. 

**3:42 pm** _Technically, this is Jay’s place. You guys could live here._

He hit send before he unwrapped another piece of cheese and nibbled on the edge of it. _They could kick us out. If Jason ever gets away from Mark, I bet he’d get this place. Mark would keep the house in the hills, and Jason would end up here. That would be it for me and Mike. We’d be out. Homeless. Or at least broke. We’d end up in a tiny apartment like Anna’s. And we’d have no room. Mike’s paints and music stuff would take over. I’d suffocate. Or die from the paint fumes, because we probably wouldn’t have any windows and no ocean air and. . ._

He stopped himself as he took a huge bite of cheese and looked at his phone just as it notified him. 

**3:45 pm** _I don’t know about that. That’s never going to happen until Mark is out of the picture. It’s a cool place. You and Mike would be okay. Nothing to worry over, Chazzy. We’re talking years from now. If Jay can get away from that bastard. I hate thinking like that, but what if he never can?_

Chester let out a sigh as he read his friend’s words. He could see Ryan’s face in his mind, the way his mouth would be curled down and his usually bright blue eyes would be dim with concern. Hopelessness. _It’s not fair for them. They deserve to live here, not me and Mike._ He balanced his phone on his knee as he unwrapped another piece of cheese, and with it sticking in his mouth, he texted back. 

**3:48 pm** _I know that feeling, but it doesn’t help. Jason is real smart, and he’ll figure it out when the time comes. You’ll see._

He hit send just as he heard the front door open and then close. He half turned in his seat, his piece of cheese still hanging out of his mouth as he looked to see Mike coming in. He raised his arm, offering his lover a silly wave. 

The first thing Mike saw was the cheese, and the second thing he saw was the beer in Chester’s hand. He dropped his keys on the coffee table and grabbed Chester’s waving hand, bringing it up to his lips for a kiss before he leaned over and smacked one on his cheek. “Hey, Ches. Beer already?” He dropped down on the couch next to Chester and tapped the bottle with his fingernail, a disapproving look on his face.

Chester shrugged. “Well, we didn’t have any wine. You know, to go with the cheese,” he giggled as he held up the rest of cheese slices, still somewhat in the package. 

“That’s not the kind of cheese you eat with wine… is it?” Mike asked, a little unsure. He wasn’t exactly schooled in the art of wine and cheese pairings. “That’s like… the cheese you use for grilled cheese sandwiches. At any rate, you can’t have been home too long. Karate goes until 3:30. I’m sorry I’m late. Anna and I got caught up in her latest hair cutting issue. I think she should stick with coloring. She does a whole lot better at that.” He reached for the beer bottle, suddenly thinking how many times lately he’d taken alcohol out of his boyfriend’s hand. 

Chester pulled back, keeping his drink and eyeing Mike. “What are you doing? Sorry, Sexy Boy, but this one’s mine. There’s more if you want one. And there’s plenty of cheese,” he added as he held the package up. “Anna. I need her to cut my hair. Or dye it. I should dye it black,” he decided with a snicker, thinking how much Mark would hate that. _He says he lets me keep my hair the way I want, but that’s a load of shit. He likes it this way._ “Or blonde,” he muttered as he pressed his fingers over his still damp mohawk. “That would be something.” 

Mike tried to see how far into the bottle Chester was since he hadn’t been able to take it and look. “I don’t want a beer. And if you want to dye your hair, I’m sure she’d do it for you.” He reached over and ruffled the hair on Chester’s head with a smile. “I bet you’d be a sexy blonde, Ches. I’d totally go for that.” He dropped his hand to the package of cheese and took a slice when Chester didn’t move it away from him like he’d moved the beer. “How many of these have you had?” he asked as he unwrapped a piece and folded it into quarters. 

Chester took a drink before his head went back against the couch and he rolled his neck so he could look at Mike. “Four. I think. No. . .three,” he decided with a squint of his eyes. “Or maybe four. I’m not sure. We’ll just say it’s five,” he laughed as he slapped his hand toward the package that had fallen to the seat cushion between them before he took another piece. He almost had it unwrapped, his beer between his legs, when his phone dinged. “That’s Ry,” he mumbled, fishing for his phone beside him. 

**3:59** _You’re right. It’s just frustrating, and easy to lose hope sometimes._

Chester frowned at his phone before he abandoned his piece of cheese on his chest, and started to type back. 

Mike narrowed his eyes as he looked Chester over again. Based off the way his boyfriend was acting, he wasn’t sure that the beer between his legs was the first one. _He’s only been home a half hour. Surely he’s not had more than this one already. But he can’t remember how much cheese he’s had, and now there’s an unwrapped piece on his chest. Who does that?_ “Chester,” he said, his voice coming out a little stern. “Are you okay? You’re acting kinda… drunk.” 

Chester hit send on his text and dropped his phone back to the couch. “I’m fine,” he answered as he looked down and patted his hand around his shirt. “Where’s my cheese?” he asked faintly, just as his fingers skimmed over it. He smiled as he picked it up and shoved it in his mouth. “And I’m not drunk. You’re worrying too much.” 

Mike studied the grin on Chester’s face for a second before he looked down at the phone on the couch, then over to the beer bottle again. “No, no I’m not. You’ve only been home a few minutes, how have you already had more than one?” He reached over for the bottle again and this time snagged it. It was almost empty when he held it up. “Ches? Damn! What happened today?” 

Chester’s eyes narrowed. His reflexes were impaired, but he tried to reach for the bottle anyway. “Mike, don’t be an ass,” he growled as his boyfriend held it out of his reach. He took one last attempt at lunging to try and get it, but his head spun on him, and he had to stop, holding onto the couch. Chester shut his eyes and swore under his breath before he sat back, his gaze focused on the ceiling. “Nothing happened,” he denied before he shut his eyes and covered his face for a second with both hands. “I dropped out of karate,” he admitted as he slowly lowered his hands to his lap. “So I’ve been here for awhile. It kinda sucked, Mike, so I had a drink.” 

“Oh. Oh, babe.” Mike set the bottle on the table next to his keys and turned to loop an arm over Chester’s hunched shoulders. “Why? Did something happen at class? You love karate, Ches.” _That explains the fact that he’s had more than one drink already. And five slices of cheese. And he’s texting Ryan. Ryan. He always talks to Ryan about the bad stuff first._ Mike tried to push down the jealous feeling rising in his stomach, especially since Chester was sitting next to him, looking so broken. “What happened?” he asked again, his voice softer as he pulled Chester close to him. 

“Nothing happened,” Chester said before he let out a huff and sat forward, his elbows on his knees. He rubbed the side of his head, his focus on the beer bottle just inches from him now. “I just realized that it’s not doing any fucking good. And then it was like, why am I here? I’m just wasting my time and my money and Joe’s time and he can give my spot to someone who will actually be able to use it and get something from it.” He could feel his heart pounding as his face burned. 

“But… you’re good at it, Ches, I’ve seen you.” Mike was struggling to understand the train of thought as Chester tried to explain. “Joe’s never said anything that even hinted that you were wasting his time. I guess I don’t know what you mean, about not using it. He was probably looking at taking you to the championships, you know?” He tried to duck and catch Chester’s eyes, but his boyfriend wasn’t cooperating. 

Chester shook his head. “I don’t care about the championships,” he hissed as he stood up, side stepped Mike and the coffee table, grabbed his beer and headed for the kitchen. “It doesn’t matter because none of it helps with Mark,” he admitted before he stopped and took a drink. “I can’t. . .it doesn’t help, so why bother? I can learn how to punch and kick and do all the moves,” he said, flailing his arm through the air, “but I get in front of Mark and my mind goes blank. I’m a, I’m a. . .” he paused, holding his beer out as he tried to come up with the right word. “I’m the deer in the headlights, and karate isn’t going to help.” 

Mike froze where he was on the couch as Chester poured out his thoughts. _That’s why he was in karate? Because of Mark? I’m so stupid sometimes._ All of his own fears about not being adequate enough to protect them both at work came crowding back, and he couldn’t think of anything to say that would help Chester feel any better. They were both in over their heads, more than he’d initially realized when he signed his contract. 

He listened to the sound of Chester’s breathing from across the room and tried to pull his mind back into focus before he stood up and turned to face his boyfriend. They looked at each other as Mike started toward him, scooping up the package of cheese that had been abandoned on the couch. “Ches. You’ve got to stop this. You’ve been a mess ever since… well, a few weekends ago. I told you, I promised you that you wouldn’t be alone in the house anymore. If we just stick together, we should be fine. You’re letting it affect you at home. He’s not here, babe. It’s just us.” He returned the cheese to the refrigerator and then stepped close to Chester, carefully sliding his arms around his waist. “I hate to see you stop doing something you enjoy just because of him.” 

Chester let himself be held, even though he didn’t really feel like it. He didn’t want to be touched at all. “I’m not trying to be messed up,” he said as a sigh escaped him, and Mike’s warm body drew him in a little more. “I’m sorry,” he mumbled as he let his face fall into the crook of Mike’s neck. “And he is here, Mike. I see him at night. . .in my dreams sometimes or when I shut my eyes.” 

This was all new information, and Mike was stunned silent again for a moment. He could feel Chester’s resistance - even though he buried his face in Mike’s neck, he didn’t reach his arms out in reciprocation. _Why hasn’t he ever told me this before? He’s never, ever hinted at anything being wrong at work, and now this? Now that I’ve seen it with my own eyes he thinks he can tell me?_

Mike ran his hand lightly over the small of Chester’s back and pressed his lips against the side of his head. “Chester. I didn’t say _you_ were messed up,” he said carefully. “I said that you’ve kinda been a mess the past few weeks. And you’ve never said anything like this before. Of course I’m worried about you when I come home and you’re drunk in the middle of the afternoon, when you’re dropping out of karate and you won’t even look at me. Ches, please. I… I don’t know what to do anymore, but if this is how it is, if it’s so bad you can’t get away from him even at home, then, _please_ , let’s just leave. I’ve been thinking about it,” he said quickly as he felt Chester stiffen in his arms. “It’s not a perfect plan, but we could go to Colorado. I don’t know if my parents would help, but we could try. And maybe being there would keep Mark away long enough for us to figure something out.” He stopped, and waited, wondering if Chester was even listening to him. He’d gone completely still in Mike’s arms.

“You’re right,” Chester said with a sniff before he straightened himself up and took a step back. “Here,” he whispered, shoving the beer bottle into Mike’s hand. “I _shouldn’t_ be drinking in the middle of the day. And I can be fine,” he promised as he wiped his eyes and let out a breath. “Don’t worry about it. I’m good,” he offered with a smile. “We can’t run away. That will never work, so no need to even plan that,” he stated before he turned and headed for the stairs. “My head hurts. I’m going to go lay down,” he called over his shoulder. He kept his eyes straight ahead until he got to the stairs, and then he looked back. Mike hadn’t moved, and Chester could tell that he was stunned. “You really don’t think he’d do something to my mom if I left?” he asked before he looked away and headed up the stairs. 

Mike looked down at the bottle in his hands. _He’s not acting like himself at all. And I don’t know what Mark would do if we left! I don’t know, but I know this isn’t going to work!_ The world felt like it was moving in slow motion as Mike set the bottle on the counter, and went to sit down at the table, dropping his head into his hands. _He actually just walked away from me. All because of fucking Mark. It’s always because of Mark. Everything that’s wrong is because of him._ Mike didn’t know if he could hate another human being more than he hated the YRS boss. _I’ll give him a minute, and then I’ll go up there. No, he told me I was hovering this morning. Maybe I should stay here. But he needs me. But he’ll take it the wrong way._

He dropped his forehead to the table and took a deep breath. _I don’t know what to do. I don’t know how to make it better. All I want to do is make it better, I have to figure this out. Before something happens, or before… before he decides he’s done with me, too._

****  
TBC


	34. Alone in the Piano Room

Thursday night showed up like a lion. The week had already been filled with awkward moments and an unspoken distance as Mike and Chester had tried to get back into their weekly routine. But something was still off, and Chester wasn’t sure how to change that. Mike was still the warm, cuddly person he’d fallen in love with, but at the moment, Chester was fighting just to let his boyfriend touch him. It was an alien feeling, and Chester was struggling to understand where it had come from. Physical contact was something he’d always enjoyed - relished in - but that had all but disappeared over the last few days. The feeling had settled in, and he couldn’t shake it, like a winter flu that was lingering well past its welcome. Things in the bedroom had gone even colder, and now their private time was just about up. In less than twenty-four hours, they would be on their way back to YRS for another contracted weekend. For another round of sex for the sake of the camera and Mark’s appetite as he would inevitably be barking commands and be right in their faces. 

Chester stared blankly at the wall as he sat next to Mike on the couch. They’d already had dinner, and Chester had spent an hour cleaning up after, washing dishes by hand and wiping down counters. He had mopped the floor and scrubbed down their kitchen table. He knew it had been in excess, but he hadn’t been able to stop himself. His hands were a bit raw now, red from all the hot soapy water, but he didn’t care. He just wanted to go upstairs and lay down and try to sleep. _And a drink. I’d love to have a drink. Sleep comes easier after a drink. Easier and deeper. . .the dreams usually don’t show up after a drink. Mike won’t like it. I know he worries. I know he’s right. I’m just so fucking tired._ Chester let out a sigh. “I think I’m going to go up to bed,” he mumbled, barely looking Mike’s way. 

A soft sigh escaped before Mike could contain it. _Again? Every night this week it’s been the same thing._ He looked at Chester’s back as he stood up and bit his lip. _If I follow him, he’s going to push me away. But if I don’t follow him…_ “Okay,” he decided, standing up. “I’m tired too. I’ll put on a movie and we can just chill.” 

Chester glanced over his shoulder. “If you want to,” he said before he headed for the stairs. _He can put on whatever he wants. I just want to sleep._ His feet felt heavy as he made it up to the loft, and the sight of their perfectly made bed brought a slight smile to his lips. The red and black flannel sheets and blankets were tucked and straight, and for a second Chester debated over how much of a crime it was to mess them up. 

Mike sat down on the end of the bed and started to unbutton his flannel, looking around as he pulled at the cuffs. _He’s really been in a cleaning mood this week. Everything is super clean. Like, obsessively. There’s not a single thing out of place or a speck of dust to be seen. He’s been busy… avoiding me._ “The place looks amazing, Ches,” he said softly, trying to get some conversation going. He pulled off his shirt and set it on the bed next to him, peering up at Chester as he went to peel off his socks.

“Thanks,” Chester answered before he yawned and stretched his arms for a minute. Mike was already sitting on the bed, and that had created a rumpled look to form over the once straight blanket. _Oh well. It can’t stay perfect forever. Nothing can._ He leaned over and pulled back the blanket and the sheet before he slid under them. He tugged at his gray t-shirt and shifted his pajama pants a little before he rolled onto his side and shut his eyes. He’d stopped sleeping naked over two weeks ago. He wasn’t a fan of trying to get comfortable while fighting with fabric and underwear and shifting things in the middle of the night, but there was also something comforting about being covered. And besides, he didn’t want to send Mike the wrong signals while he was still trying to get comfortable in his own skin again since the last incident with Mark. 

Mike felt a little pinch at his heart as Chester got into bed. _He’s not going to let me be close - again. I miss him._ The frustration he felt was trying to make its way out in the form of tears and he blinked a few times, turning his head away from Chester as he stood up to get out of his jeans. _I don’t think it’s me. Maybe it’s me? Wouldn’t he just… wouldn’t he just break up with me if it was something I did? It’s got to be about work. About what happened. But I wish he wouldn’t shut me out._ He gathered up his clothes and tossed them in the hamper, coming back to the bed and sliding in next to Chester in his white t-shirt and blue boxers. The way he always slept.

 _I just want to hold him. Why won’t he let me do that?_ Mike looked at the back of his boyfriend’s neck for a moment, then closed his eyes as he carefully scooted close and put his arm around Chester’s waist. _Please don’t push me away._ He took a deep breath, inhaling the familiar peachy scent of his body wash, and his stomach squeezed in longing. 

Chester’s body tensed as Mike’s arm slid over his waist. He could feel his boyfriend’s warmth behind him, as their legs and middles touched. Chester’s eyes opened and fixated on the top of the open staircase. He could feel Mike’s breath on the back of his neck, and a shiver ran down him. “Mike, I’m tired,” he mumbled, trying not to sound harsh as he wiggled to break the close hold. 

“I know,” Mike whispered, shifting his arm a little to let Chester get comfortable. “I just… please, Ches, I miss you. I just want to hold you, I promise.” He knew he sounded pathetic but he was in serious withdrawal. Ever since they’d started sharing a bed they’d fallen asleep wrapped in each other’s arms, and the past week had been hell. It wasn’t flat out rejection, but it felt that way to Mike. He wanted to kiss the back of Chester’s neck but he knew that would send him to the other side of the bed, and Mike wanted nothing more than to fall asleep with Chester close just once before they went back to work. 

Chester could hear the pain in his boyfriend’s voice, and he knew that was his fault. It wasn’t fair to push Mike away, to keep him at bay the way he had been. But something was off, and Chester felt helpless against it. He covered his face with his arm before he nodded. “We can stay like this,” he said, his eyes closed as he tried to send his mind away. He didn’t want to think about any of it, especially not about what was coming tomorrow. 

Mike closed his eyes and said a silent thank you to whatever higher power kept Chester in his arms for the first time all week. Even though things weren’t okay. Even though he wanted to pull him closer, tighter, kiss away whatever was bothering him. _I don’t know what to do, Ches. I don’t know how to make things better, and I’m scared I can’t fix this. And I need you. I need you._ He lay carefully still, afraid that any movement he made would send Chester away, his thoughts consumed with questions and desperate, silent pleas for everything to work itself out. The minutes dragged slowly as he waited for Chester to drop off into sleep, then cautiously feathered his lips over the back of his neck in a barely there kiss. “Love you,” he whispered, even though he knew Chester couldn’t hear him. “Good night, babe.” 

****

The next morning had arrived with cloudy skies and a chill in the air, and Chester took that as a bad omen. He’d kept his words to a minimum as he and Mike had gotten ready to go to work, his mind tumbling over how things would be. He knew he and Mike had a scene to do, and he knew Ryan would be there and so would Amir, but that was all he knew. He hadn’t heard anything about Caleb or Devon and so far Mark and Jason hadn’t brought anyone new onto the YRS roster. 

“I hope the weekend goes fast,” Chester commented partially under his breath and partially to Mike as he pulled their car to a stop in the driveway of the massive house he’d grown to hate. Work used to not be so bad. It used to even be fun on some level. It was good money, and the atmosphere was often carefree - a place to goof around with guys his own age when they weren’t under the camera. He used to look forward to Brad’s cooking and shooting shit with Ryan. But none of that was present now. It had all been sucked into some black hole that Chester felt, even though he couldn’t see it. Everything just looked like ghosts now - the house, the guys, Brad’s food, the luxury of being in the hills - it was nothing but phantoms that Chester could no longer enjoy. 

“Me, too,” Mike mumbled. There was no part of him that was looking forward to the weekend. It was hard enough to get into the right headspace to get through his shoots with Chester, even after all these months, and he wasn’t sure he’d be able to keep himself together emotionally after being shut out all week. He’d really tried to draw a line between what they did for work and what they did in private, but there was a reason Mike could never watch any of their videos. No matter how hard he tried, there were obvious slips in his porn persona that showed Charlie Bang was more than a casual fuck buddy for Kenji Kobayashi. There were always moments of tenderness between them, and Mike had no idea - didn’t want to know - if Jason bothered to edit them out, or if that was part of what made them popular. As he shut the car door and looked up at the big house, all Mike felt was dread. _If he can’t stand me touching him at home, how are we going to get through this weekend?_

Chester glanced up at the sky, peering at the heavy clouds and he would have sworn he heard a rumble in the distance. He rubbed the arms of his long sleeved black shirt before he looked over at Mike. His boyfriend was about three feet away, but it felt like there was three miles worth of space between them. _He looks so sad. I’m making him sad. Maybe this is what Brad saw in his vision. . .this is the heartbreak. I knew it would be me. I knew it._ He curled his hands into the too-long sleeves of his shirt and wiped both his eyes before he shook it away. _It doesn’t matter. Not right now. Right now we have to work. Right now I’m not Chester and he’s not Mike. I’m Charlie Bang. . .and Charlie Bang always has a good time fucking for fun._

He tried to force a smile, but it just wouldn’t come as he started up the walk. He heard Mike move behind him, and for half a second he thought of waiting so they could hold hands like they normally did when walking into YRS. Chester stopped, and swung back to look at his boyfriend, just as he heard a commotion coming from the front of the house. 

Immediately he whirled back around, just in time to see Ryan and Amir rushing out the front door with Brad in between them. The chef looked pale - like he was ready to faint - as his two escorts practically carried him down the steps and onto the pathway leading to the driveway. “What happened?” Chester asked, as he stepped out of the way. He quickly looked over and Mike was right beside him. 

“Is he okay?” Mike asked, his eyes on Brad’s stricken face.

“He cut his finger!” Ryan hollered as he and Amir rushed the chef past Chester and Mike. “We’re taking him to the E.R.! He’s going to need stitches!” He spun his head back around to look at Chester before he pulled the other two to a quick stop. “Jay took Caleb and Devon off site, with Mark, I think, to go shoot down at the beach or something. Not sure when they’ll be back.” 

“The beach?” Chester questioned, just as he felt a raindrop hit his nose and he looked up again before he said, “but it’s raining.” 

“That never stops Jason,” Amir tossed over his shoulder as they continued down the path to Ryan’s car. “Text him, Chaz! Tell him where we are!” 

Chester nodded as he watched Ryan open up the driver’s side door of his silver Lotus and get in as Brad clung to Amir, begging him to sit in the backseat with him. “Wow,” Chester mumbled. “I mean, damn. I hope he’s going to be okay.” He looked over to see Mike watching the trio as well, and Chester pulled his phone out, just as he felt more rain falling onto his head and face. He quickly pulled up Jason’s name in his text messages and started typing. “Come on, Sexy Boy, it’s raining,” he said, as he turned toward the house while his fingers zipped across his keyboard. 

Mike followed, his heart pumping with adrenaline. It was the most emotion he’d heard from Chester all week. “I’m sure he’ll be fine, Ches.” He stopped to open the front door for Chester, who stepped in without looking up from his phone. Mike looked around the foyer, but Adam was nowhere to be seen. The house seemed eerily quiet. “It doesn’t look like anyone else is around. I guess they’re all at the beach.”

Chester looked up, scanning the empty space. “Adam should be here somewhere. He doesn’t go to shoots or anything like -”

“Mike! Chaz!” Adam called as he appeared from the hallway, holding his stomach and walking slowly. “Good, you guys made it in safe.” He wiped the back of his hand over his sweaty forehead. “I’ve got some kind of stomach bug. I’ve got to go home,” the guard informed them. His mouth was hanging open as he breathed, as he tried to guess how many minutes he had before his next round of emergency bathroom needs would come along. “Tell Jason, would you, Chaz?” he begged. 

“Oh, of course,” Chester answered immediately as he took a step out of the way so Adam could get to the door. “Are you sure you’re okay to drive? We could take you,” he offered as he motioned between him and Mike. 

“Yeah,” Mike jumped in, though he was keeping his distance from Adam. The last thing he wanted was whatever stomach virus he had. He could already feel his skin crawling with the thought of airborne germs.

Adam waved his hand back and forth. “No, that’s okay, boys. I don’t want to get either of you sick. I just need to go home. Chaz, tell Jason,” he begged again, and he waited till he saw Chester nod in agreement before he was out the door, rushing for his car. 

“Man,” Chester said with half a breath. “What a crazy day. . .and it hasn’t even started yet.” He heard his phone jingle in his pocket and he pulled it out to see a text from Jason. 

**9:07 am** _Ok. You both stay there. You’re on for the afternoon, but we’ll probably be late. It’s raining so we’ve got to wait it out._

 **9:09 am** _Will do. Adam just left, he’s sick. We’ll just hang around till you guys get back._

He didn’t even bother to reread his text before he hit send and stuck his phone back in his front jean pocket. “Jason says they’re waiting out the rain, so they won’t be back for awhile. We have to stay though, it will be our turn later.” 

Mike nodded, watching Chester’s face carefully. _So here we are. Alone. Still. And without the comfort of even being at home._ When Chester didn’t offer anything else, Mike took a deep breath and walked toward the living room. “Well, what do you want to do? Or… do you just want to go upstairs and lay down?” He tried not to sound bitter, but he was almost sure that’s what his boyfriend would want to do. _Anything to not have to talk to me. But he knows, I’m not letting him out of my sight. Even if we are alone._

Chester shrugged just as a clap of thunder boomed overhead and he jumped, right toward Mike. Without thought he’d latched his hands around Mike’s arm as he looked up, even though they were inside. “That was loud,” he whispered, staring at the lights that he swore he saw flickering. “I hope the electricity doesn’t go out.” 

It was the first time in a week Chester had touched him voluntarily, and Mike couldn’t help the smile that spread over his face. “It’s okay, babe… even if it does, there’s lots of natural light in the piano room. Come on, let’s go sit in there. Maybe I can play for you a bit.” He petted his hand over Chester’s lightly, still cautious even though his boyfriend had been the one to touch him first this time.

Chester nodded as he slid his hand down Mike’s arm till he had their fingers entwined. He let his lover lead the way. In between booms of thunder, Chester could hear their footsteps. “It’s so quiet. Like, spooky quiet. Well, that’s probably just me being paranoid about the storm. Thunder kind of freaks me out. And lightning. Have you ever seen a storm on the ocean?” he asked, knowing that he and Mike hadn’t been together long enough to go through the stormy season in California yet. Ocean storms were something he’d seen plenty of from his loft viewpoint. 

“Yeah,” Mike said softly, his heart beating in his ears. _My hand. He’s holding my hand._ He squeezed Chester’s fingers, wanting to pull him closer, protect him from the storm. “I love the way it looks at night. The lightning over the ocean. It’s beautiful. I should try to paint that someday.” They stepped into the piano room and Mike stopped, then looked at Chester. “I’m kinda glad we’re alone for a bit, you know? So it’s not just jumping back in so fast. I mean, I hope Brad’s gonna be okay… and Adam… but… well, it’s just been a long week. I’m not really ready for this yet.” 

“Yeah,” Chester agreed softly. “I know it’s been hard. I’m sorry,” he apologized with a sigh. He went to say more, but stopped. He wasn’t sure how much Mike would understand. The days had felt heavy, and Chester wasn’t even sure if he wanted to talk, at least not about that. “You know,” he said, letting Mike’s hand go and moving closer to the windows, where the rain was tapping against them, “I’ve never been here alone before. I mean, without Mark and Jason, at least. It’s like, we broke into their house,” he suggested as he half turned around and smiled toward Mike. 

“It’s kinda fun,” Mike said, a devilish smile crossing his face. “This house is huge. We should go exploring.” He stopped when he saw the look that came over Chester’s face. “Well, maybe not. You’ve probably seen most of it anyway.” He felt his smile fade and he looked out the window where Chester had returned his attention. _You’ve got to go slower, you can’t assume it’s all okay all of a sudden. Let him decide what he wants to do._

He stepped behind the piano and lifted the cover from the keys. It had been awhile since he’d been able to play on a real piano… the last time he’d played had been during the last promo weekend, and it hadn’t been for long. Jason had taken that away when he’d started issuing orders to get naked in front of everyone. He frowned as he sat down on the bench and hovered his hands over the keys, trying to decide if he should play or not. 

Lightning flashed outside, brightening the entire piano room for a second before thunder followed it, and Chester jumped back from the window. He felt his heart pound a little harder as he turned around. He narrowed his eyes for a minute as he watched Mike stare at the keys, his hands just above them, like he wasn’t sure if he was allowed to play or not. _I know he misses his old job. I wish we had the space at the loft to get him a nice piano like this one. I’ve really been unfair to him this week. I love him so much. It’s not his fault._

Chester rubbed the back of his neck for a minute before he glanced toward the open doorway. He hesitated as he listened, searching for the sounds of people - of talking or laughter or of Mark’s barking voice - but there was nothing. Just the rain and the thunder, and his sad looking boyfriend. 

Chester crossed the room and stood behind Mike. His eyes focused on a spot on the back of his lover’s neck, and he lifted his hand to feather his fingers over the soft skin. “Play something for me?” he asked. 

A shiver ran down Mike’s spine as Chester touched him, and he dropped his chin, closing his eyes to enjoy the moment. He’d been starved for Chester’s attention all week. He cracked his eyes open and looked at the keys, his heart aching for a moment, feeling undecided as to whether to play or turn around and smash his face into Chester’s stomach. But Chester had asked him to play, so he started slow, an intricate and elaborate piano sonata that he’d known for years. It sounded he way he imagined his heart would sound if Chester could hear it. Lonely. _Maybe he’ll get it, maybe this will explain how I’m feeling without me having to say it._

The tune was slow, and kind of sad sounding to Chester’s ears, but he felt like it fit perfectly with the falling rain outside. He let his fingers slide all around Mike’s neck, and then down the back of his flannel, drawing circles and lines. “I love listening to you play,” he said, speaking loud enough to be heard over the music and the rain. “Maybe one day we can get you one of these. . .when we move to a different place.” He swallowed as the words _a different place_ repeated in his head. The future had become so dim over the last few weeks, and he hated himself for saying something that sounded like a promise he might not be able to keep. 

“Some day,” Mike agreed vaguely, his concentration split between Chester’s hands and his music. He could play this piece without really thinking about it, and he was trying hard not to wonder what Chester’s touches and his words meant. If playing piano made Chester want to be close to him, he’d play for the rest of the day. He’d play until his back ached and his fingers cramped. He’d never stop if it would keep his boyfriend close. 

As Mike continued to play, Chester let his hand roam. He pressed a little harder up Mike’s spine, and a little lighter around his neck. He did a little drumming motion on Mike’s shoulder blades, just the way he knew he liked it. There had been no lack of naked massages going on over the months of their relationship, and Chester knew Mike’s body like his own. 

He heard a moan from Mike’s lips when he pressed his thumb into deep circles on the nape of his neck, and for the first time in a week, Chester felt his cock stir. It was a shock even to himself, and he gasped as he pulled his hand away. He twisted his head to look toward the open doorway again. _We’re alone. I know we’re alone. If I start something. . .I can’t start something and not follow through. Especially not after this past week. I want him. . .I miss him._ He licked his lips and shut his eyes as he decided to let himself feel it. Whatever or wherever his impromptu piano massage was going, he was going to let himself enjoy it. He was going to let Mike enjoy it. “Is this okay?” he whispered as he gently rubbed his fingers back over Mike’s open skin. 

“Mmhmm,” Mike hummed as he nodded his head, trying not to anticipate much even though Chester’s hands were stirring desire as he stroked over his back. He could feel the need spreading over his body and tried to keep focus on the music he was playing. _I’m not going to push him. And it’s not like he’d really be trying to start anything here anyway. Not out here in the open. Maybe he’ll want to go upstairs. But probably not. I can’t think like that._ Still, he shifted back a little, hoping maybe Chester’s hands would roam to his front.

Chester smiled as he added his second hand, one tracing around Mike’s neck, the other over his shoulder and then down his side. He leaned down pressing his lips into Mike’s blue hair before he moved his arm around to brush his fingers over his boyfriend’s belly. “I love you,” he said, before he kissed the side of his head, and then his ear. 

Mike gave up on the piano as soon as he felt Chester’s lips on his ear, sliding a hand up to cup the back of his boyfriend’s head, tracing over the back of his hair. “I love you, too.” He turned a little to get his lips next to Chester’s, but he stopped, still afraid of his reaction. It had been a long week of rejection. “I… I want to kiss you, Ches... can I?” He felt silly, stupid for asking, but it felt important to let there be an option to say no. 

Chester dropped his hands away and stood up straight. He watched as Mike’s hopeful look turned to a panic. “No,” he said, as he took a step back. “Not like this. Is. . .is there room for both of us on that bench?” he asked, pointing. 

“Of course.” Mike scooted over, the hopeful smile back on his lips. “There’s always room for you, Ches. Always.”

Chester’s grin hit the ceiling as he stepped closer. The idea of sitting side-by-side with Mike vanished, and he straddled the bench instead, facing his boyfriend. “How about I sit like this,” he said, his eyebrow cocking. He scooted himself as close as he could, pulling Mike between his spread legs before he leaned in. His lips parted, and he felt his breath leave his body as he closed his eyes. One hand was wrapped around Mike’s bicep, his other was still on his own leg as he let his lips touch Mike’s in a slow, re-introductory kiss. 

Even with Chester taking the lead, Mike was cautious. He braced one hand on the edge of the piano bench and dropped the other to Chester’s knee, lightly stroking his fingers as he allowed his boyfriend to set the tone. He relished the light suckle of his bottom lip as Chester kissed him, and he didn’t press their lips closer, though he wanted to. He waited, until Chester leaned closer, until he felt the warm tip of his lover’s tongue glide across his own lips to taste him. It felt like it had been forever since they kissed. Mike tilted his head to the side to let Chester have what he wanted. 

Mike’s mouth was warm, and Chester felt the tingles of passion rushing through him. He pressed his tongue forward, and Mike allowed it. His mind fluttered into the happy place it went when he was alone with Mike, into thoughts of naked skin and getting Mike to laugh. Into running his hands over every bit of his lover, and letting his lips follow. He moved his free hand to Mike’s stomach, gripping at his flannel shirt as need kicked in. He pulled out of the kiss, just to sink his lips back in. He knew it had been too long, for both of them. 

The instant Chester’s hand pulled on his shirt, Mike couldn’t keep his hands away anymore. He let go of the bench and slid his hand around the side of Chester’s neck, his thumb tracing his lover’s jawline as their kiss went deeper. He could feel the week’s built up desire surfacing. He could feel all the lost, helpless feelings fading as Chester’s need became apparent. It was a blast of relief through his system as he realized that they were going to be okay. Chester was kissing him, touching him, wanted to be close to him. He broke their kiss and leaned their foreheads together, his eyes closed as he caught his breath. “God, Ches… I’ve missed this.” 

“Me too, Sexy Boy,” Chester said, his voice hitching between words as he breathed. He tugged on Mike’s shirt front before he let go and shoved his hand up under it instead, his fingers touching Mike’s warm skin with greed. “We’re alone,” he said, knowing that at least some hesitation about their surroundings would probably be going through Mike’s mind. “It’s just us.” 

“Yeah?” Mike whispered. “I think you’re right. What do you want to do about that?” He dragged his thumb over Chester’s lips, flipping his lip ring gently. “You got something in mind?” He was miles away from suggesting that they go upstairs. He wasn’t one hundred percent sure he was reading the signals correctly, but he was hoping that maybe he was. 

“Hmmmm,” Chester hummed out loud before he let go of Mike’s stomach and sat back a little. “Stand up,” he said, with a flick of his hand. “And let’s scoot this bench back a little.” Before Mike could say yes, Chester was easing himself off the bench, trying his hardest not to trip himself as he lifted his leg up and over. 

Mike almost knocked the bench over in his haste to follow directions, standing up next to Chester and pushing it back with his leg. “You look like you’ve got a good idea,” he said, his smile so wide it was hurting his face as he reached to grab Chester’s hand. Every second Chester didn’t push him away was a second that Mike’s confidence was returning.

“Maybe,” Chester teased with a smile as he stepped in between Mike and the piano. He wrapped his arm around Mike’s neck, and pressed their bodies together as he brought them into a kiss before he nudged his way from his boyfriend’s lips, to his jawline, and then to his ear. He petted his lips and tongue all over the shell of Mike’s ear, and then down to his earring. He inhaled the scent of peaches coming off his boyfriend’s skin - the familiar smell they both shared these days. 

Chester moaned into his smile as pushed his nose up against the bottom of Mike’s ear, and then he kissed him down his neck. His hand dropped down Mike’s back, to his ass, and there he latched his hand on firmly. He pulled Mike tighter up against himself, pushing his half hard cock into Mike’s front, the friction and contact sending tickles up his legs. 

Excitement and relief flooded Mike’s brain, the feel of Chester’s body against him so welcome after the past week. He wrapped his arms around his boyfriend tightly, trying not to come across desperate for the kisses and touches he was getting. It hadn’t taken much for his desire to make itself known, his cock definitely ready for more as he felt Chester against him. “I love you,” he said again as Chester continued the kisses around the back of his ear and landed on that soft spot that drove him insane. “I do. And I want you so much. You feel so good.” He dug his hand up under Chester’s shirt and slid his hand under the waistband of his jeans, grabbing at the skin right above his tiny ass.

Chester’s hips bucked, and his head dropped. He kissed along Mike’s shoulder, and decided quickly that his lover had way too many clothes on. “Can we take this off?” he asked, pulling back just enough to catch Mike’s dark eyes. He tugged at the buttons of the flannel. “I’ll do it for you. . .if that’s okay.” 

Mike bit his lip and looked around the space. He wanted to say yes but they were right there in the middle of the piano room. Anyone could walk in and see them, but Chester was looking at him with his sexy bedroom eyes, and he was sure they were alone. _Everyone is gone. And should be for a while. Right? It will be okay. And he wants me. Right here, right now. After this week, I couldn’t say no if I wanted to. Which I don’t._ “Yeah,” he agreed, looking back into Chester’s eyes. “Yeah, take it off, babe.”

“Sucker,” Chester snickered with a grin before he leaned in and gave Mike’s lips a quick peck and then he got to work. He unbuttoned the flannel at lightning speed, popping each button and then pushing the shirt off his lover’s shoulders. He mumbled something to himself about Mike’s skin before he let the shirt drop to the floor. He wrapped his arms around his boyfriend’s waist and pressed his lips to his neck, and then down the crook of his neck and onto his shoulder, leaving a damp trail of lip footprints behind him. “I love the way you taste,” he managed to say between kisses. He feathered his fingers up Mike’s back, as he dropped his kisses lower, hitting his lover’s chest, and then his nipple, teasing it with his tongue with soft swirls. 

“Ahhh, God, Ches,” Mike whined, his head falling back as Chester lavished attention on him. A little voice popped up in his head, mocking him for needing the physical closeness so desperately, but he pushed it away. The distance between them that had been present all week seemed to have dissolved, and Mike wasn’t going to fight it. He tugged at the collar of Chester’s shirt, and managed to get out, “you too. Take yours off too so I can touch you.” 

Chester pulled back, his cheeks flushed from the heavy breathing and kissing. He tugged at the arms of the long sleeves, and a few seconds later he had it off, tossing it to the floor. He stayed where he was, and ran a hand down Mike’s front. He followed his own movements before he looked into Mike’s deep eyes. “It was never because I didn’t want to,” he said, catching himself off guard. He wet his dry lips. “Mike, I’ll always want you, just. . .it gets complicated sometimes.” 

Mike ran his fingers over Chester’s tattoos, treasuring the warmth of the inked skin he loved. “You’ve always said you can keep things separate, though,” he said quietly, afraid to ruin the moment. “Is it because I’m part of this now? Am I part of the bad stuff now too?” He couldn’t help himself; he’d struggled so much the past week, trying to understand what he’d done wrong, and now it finally felt like Chester wanted to say something about it all. He needed to know before things went any further. 

“You’ll never be part of the bad stuff, Mike,” Chester whispered before he dropped his eyes to the floor, staring at the marble flooring, which looked dull at the moment. “It used to be easy. I think it was easy because I didn’t care. About me, I didn’t care about me,” he clarified as he looked up for a second and took a quiet moment. “I was here making money and paying off debt and it didn’t matter. Mark could pair me with whoever, or do whatever to me and it didn’t matter because I was working toward my goal and then, then you came along and,” he paused as he pulled his bottom lip in for a second, sucking on his piercing before he met Mike’s gaze. “Now it matters. It’s been slow, like, it hasn’t happened all at once. The longer we’re together, the more I care and then, the other week, he. . .he didn’t just threaten me, Mike. He threatened you if I didn’t do it.” Chester let out a shiver as he took an unsteady step back, his hands touching the piano behind him. 

“Me?” Mike asked, his voice barely above a whisper. “But, I… Ches, you know I can’t… I can’t just… That’s not me. I’d never do anything with anyone else. I’ve never _been_ with anyone else and I don’t want to _be_ with anyone else. Just you. I’m only doing this for you. There’s no sex without love for me. I wouldn’t just do what he says.” He pressed a hand over his heart as he looked at Chester, at his boyfriend’s expression that screamed ‘it doesn’t matter.’ “If that’s what you’re worried about, don’t. I’m here for you, that’s it.” 

Chester shook his head. “It doesn’t work that way,” he whispered. “He could do it. I didn’t, I couldn’t let you take the punishment because I wasn’t doing what he wanted.” His hand went to his chest as he tried to help Mike understand. “And then you showed up and he attacked you and I couldn’t do anything about it and it’s just like karate. I can’t fight him and I know that now and it’s messing with me.” He lowered his head as he covered his face. “Maybe I’ve never been able to fight him, I just thought I could. But it has nothing to do with you,” he made sure to say. “I’m trying. . .just trying to hold it all together. Guess I’ve been failing the last few weeks.” 

Mike stepped forward and wrapped his fingers around Chester’s wrists, lightly tugging them away from his face. “Look at me. And listen,” he said softly. “You’re not going to have to fight him alone. I’m here, Chester, and I’m not going anywhere. And maybe I’m not the biggest guy here, but nobody loves you like I do, and I swear to you, I’d find a way.” He waited for Chester to look up, to lock his eyes on Mike’s before he went on. “I promise you, if it came down to it, there would be enough evidence, enough people on our side, to claim self-defense. And I’d do it, if I had to.” He took a deep breath, hardly believing the words coming out of his own mouth. 

“Mike, no,” Chester said, his mouth hanging open slightly in shock. “That’s crazy talk. Mark is awful, but that’s. . .look, Sexy Boy, we just have to go with things until the contracts are up or until Mark gets tired of us and fires us. And it can happen, I’ve seen it,” he said with a motion of his hand through the air. “He’s just, I think he’s mad at me. Or you. Us, I guess at this point. I was letting him get away with a lot of stuff before and now,” he stopped and shook it off. “I don’t want to talk about it. Besides,” he said, reaching out and sliding a hand down Mike’s bare arm, “I think we should take advantage of this huge empty house.” 

They were quiet for a moment, before Mike looked out the window at the rain and said, “sorry. I know you think I’m crazy for saying that. Let’s hope we never even get close to that point.” He reached out and covered Chester’s heart with his palm. “Whatever you want right now, that’s what I want. I want you to feel better, I want you to know how much I love you. I _need_ you to know that. I don’t want to think about Mark or any of this anymore. Let’s forget all of it.” 

Chester smiled before he stole a quick kiss from Mike’s serious face. “Good, because I’m ready to throw you down and have my way with you,” he laughed. “And for the record, I know how much you love me.” He took Mike’s hand and squeezed it before he pulled him toward the doorway. “Come on,” he said, his voice hitting a high pitched giggle, “I got something to show you.” 

Mike let himself be led this time, away from the piano that he’d forgotten to close, back into the quiet house. “I knew it,” he said with a lilt in his voice. “I knew we didn’t need to go exploring. You already know everything about this house.” Chester didn’t go far, and Mike found himself standing in the kitchen, which looked abandoned in the middle of some sort of meal preparation. _Brad was probably chopping something when he cut himself. It must really be bad, he’d never leave the kitchen like this._ “What are we doing in here, Ches?”

“I do know everything about this house. Well, almost. There’s one or two rooms I’ve never been in, but for the most part, I’m a YRS veteran. I could walk these floors blindfolded and tell you where everything is. In fact, I have been blindfolded a few times,” he said, his eyes squinting in memory before he dismissed himself. “Anyway, doesn’t matter. I want to show you this,” he said, as he tugged on Mike’s hand, leading him to the far side of the kitchen where there was a long bench seat. “This is Brad’s secret stash,” he announced before he lifted the wooden seat to reveal an ample storage area, all of which was taken up by an assortment of blankets and pillows, all in different shapes, designs, and colors. 

Mike ran his hand over a particularly soft looking light blue blanket and chuckled. “Why secret? What does he need all of this for? Does he make blanket forts in the kitchen at night after everyone goes to bed?” He tugged on the corner of the blanket and looked at Chester. 

“Please, Mike, don’t be silly,” Chester said as he picked up a pink and yellow pillow. “These are in here because they’re cursed.” He waited for a second as he watched Mike cock a suspicious eyebrow at him. “I’m serious! Brad can see the future,” he stated with certainty, “and that includes knowing when objects have, like, curses on them. Sometimes Jason or Mark will bring new blankets and pillows and salt shakers,” he said as he reached in and pulled out a rather expensive looking silver salt shaker, “that Brad gets a bad reading on and all of that stuff comes in here. It’s mostly pillows and blankets,” he stated, scratching his head. “I’m not sure why.” 

“You really believe in this stuff, don’t you?” Mike asked for at least the twentieth time since he’d been at YRS. “How can pillows and blankets be cursed? They’re inanimate objects. It doesn’t make any sense. Besides,” he said reasonably, pulling out the blanket he already felt attached to, “this one is super cuddly. I like it.”

“I believe it because it’s true,” Chester insisted before he tossed the salt shaker back in with the other stuff. “But I wanted to show them to you because these have never been used.” He waved his hand over the lot. “And I know, well I know how you feel about things in this place. But all this stuff is untouched. I figured we could grab some and go back to the piano room. Lay down and watch the rain. . .and fool around. Brad won’t mind. He won’t let this stuff leave the house. He says that once they’re here, it’s even more dangerous to send them away because fate brought them here in the first place. Something like that. But I figure they won’t hurt us, we have no bad intentions for them.” He popped a smile across his lips, hoping Mike would agree, even though they’d be lying on cursed blankets and pillows. 

“You want to take pillows and blankets - that you believe are cursed - and go make out on them just to spite the spirits? Or whatever?” Mike looked at his boyfriend seriously for a moment, then rolled his eyes. “I’m game. You know I don’t believe any of that stuff anyway. I want this blue one,” he said, cuddling it close. 

“We’re not spiteing any spirits, Mike,” Chester said as he reached in and took a black blanket and the pink and yellow pillow he had grabbed originally. “Brad says that these things are cursed, so he won’t let them be used in the shoots. He says it’s like, if you have two bad energies and you put them together then something awful will happen. But you and me, we’re not a bad energy. You see?” 

“Sure,” Mike said, shrugging his shoulders. “You and me could reverse whatever bad energy these things have.” He wrinkled his nose at the pile in Chester’s hands. “Those don’t even match, Ches, I’m shocked at you.” 

Chester looked down at the two items he’d chosen. “Well, I like this pink one,” he said, “and black goes with everything. That’s the golden rule, Sexy Boy. Black is your friend.” He flashed Mike a goofy smile. “Let’s take a couple more blankets and some more pillows. The floor in the piano room is super hard and unforgiving on your back.” He crouched over, pulling out a yellow blanket and a green pillow that had a diamond pattern on it. 

_I’m going to pretend I didn’t hear that floor comment,_ Mike thought, reaching in and pulling out another soft looking plaid blanket, stopping to admire the flannel-like pattern. “I think we have enough,” he said, trying to see over the mound of stuff in Chester’s hands. “I bet if we fold them over and pile them on top of each other, it will be fine. Nice and soft. And if we’re going to watch the rain at all, we should hurry. You know it could stop as fast as it started.” He started back toward the piano room without looking to see if Chester was following. It was freeing, not having to worry about keeping Chester right next to him every second they were in the big house. 

“The rain better not stop,” Chester said as he followed his lover through the hallway. “How are we going to make out under the rain if it stops? And when it stops, that means Jason and the others will be that much closer to coming back. I don’t want them to come back. Not yet,” he whined just as they stepped into the piano room. A crack of thunder and a flash of lightning later and Chester was right beside Mike, their upper arms touching. 

“It’s okay, babe.” Mike smiled as he felt Chester next to him, his protective streak surfacing instantly. “Did you hide from thunderstorms when you were a kid?” He dropped his pile on the floor and started to fold his plaid blanket in half.

Chester set his blankets and pillows down close to where Mike had left his. “You’ve seen my mom’s house and where my bedroom is. . .on the top floor. Storms used to scare me because the thunder would rattle the roof and the lights always flickered and usually went out when it stormed. It’s an old house. I hate her still living there. Well, you know,” he said, motioning toward Mike. They’d been over this subject more than once. Chester’s childhood home was practically falling down around his mother. It was one more reason that money was needed, since there always seemed to be something that needed fixed. “And now, at the loft, I see it over the ocean and it’s still, I don’t know,” he muttered as he started to spread out the blankets. “I think I just like to torture myself. Like right now,” he said pointing toward the large windows they were about to lay down in front of. “I jump every time it thunders and yet what do I do? I suggest that we get it on right in front of these massive windows while it’s storming. I’m a glutton for pain.” 

The pile of cursed blankets looked soft and inviting, and Mike looked out the windows before he reached for Chester’s hand. “Like I said before… I’m here. And I’ve got you. No scary rain will get you while I’m with you.” He felt Chester’s fingers lace through his and it was like the past week hadn’t even happened. Even in this house that he hated, he felt at home with Chester’s hand securely in his.

“You say that about everything,” Chester said through his smile before he pulled Mike up against himself. He wrapped one arm around Mike’s naked back and kissed his neck quickly before he asked, “Ready to try out all these cursed blankets?” 

“Let’s do it.” It was almost like building a fort out of blankets and pillows, Mike decided as they lay down next to each other, and Mike arranged the green pillow under his head so he could see out the window. The rain was hitting the glass and falling in slow moving rivers that he followed with his eyes for a few minutes before he looked over at his boyfriend. He looked more relaxed than Mike had seen him in weeks, despite the thunderstorm. “I know I say that about everything,” he whispered, going back to what Chester had said before they’d taken their spots on the floor, “but it’s true. I want to be your safe place. I want you to know you can always come to me.” He traced a fingertip down one of Chester’s flames and then back up as he spoke. 

Chester’s hand went right to Mike’s face, his fingers scooping up into his hairline, before he leaned in, taking his lips. He was done talking. He wanted to be physically close to his lover so they could make love and take back what they’d been missing all week. He knew that in just a few hours, they would have to do it all again, but that wouldn’t be love. That would be for the camera. It would be someone else’s wishes. Someone else’s vision and direction. But here, on the blankets underneath the rain, they were getting to do it their way and right out in the open. 

Chester slid his hand down Mike’s naked side as he moaned into their kiss. His fingers latched onto the closest belt loop his fingers could find and pulled Mike a little a closer. The rain over head served as a shield to the rest of the house, like they were somehow secluded. Chester didn’t hold back when he broke their kiss, his breathing heavy as he whined and kissed along Mike’s neck and under his jaw. 

It didn’t take much for Mike to pull Chester mostly on top of him, and he ran both hands over his boyfriend’s back until they landed on his ass. The need from earlier was back, and it was urgent as he pressed their hips together, turning his face to the side to give Chester more room to lick and kiss and find all the best spots. He cracked open his eyes a bit and caught the rain again, but watching the sky wasn’t the priority. He’d stared at the sky enough in the past week. All he wanted was Chester, in whatever way that was going to happen there on the floor.

He wiggled a hand between them and tugged on the waistband of Chester’s jeans like he’d done earlier. “Ches,” he gasped between ragged breaths. “Let’s lose these. I want to feel you.”

Chester lifted himself up so he could see Mike’s face. “Always so demanding,” he said with a smile and a chuckle. “Don’t move,” he instructed as he bent down and kissed Mike’s cheek before he sat back, putting his weight on his knees. He was between Mike’s spread legs as he started to unbutton his lover’s jeans. “Lift that fine ass of yours,” he said, batting his eyes at Mike as he tugged on his jeans to get them off his hips for him. 

“I said _your_ pants, not mine,” Mike complained, even as he went along with it. Chester was slick and before he knew it, he didn’t have a stitch of clothing on, his underwear discarded to the side along with his jeans. He shook his head at Chester and laughed under his breath. “That was quick.” 

Chester was still on his knees between Mike’s legs. He slid one finger up Mike’s thigh. “Of course. I’m skilled,” he said with a grin. “Close your eyes, Sexy Boy,” he whispered, and he waited as he watched his boyfriend start to protest, but ultimately did as he was asked. Chester took one last look out the windows behind him before he bent forward. He started at Mike’s knee, pressing soft kisses and licks all the way up until he could nuzzle his nose against Mike’s ball sack. He sucked in his scent, and the warmth that was coming off his lover. He took Mike’s hip with one hand, and then he let his tongue come out, lapping it around his boyfriend’s length and then over his head before his lips closed over it. 

Despite being asked to close his eyes, Mike couldn’t help himself from looking down to watch for just a second as he felt Chester’s warm mouth cover him. It was one of his favorite sights, one he could never get enough of, and one it felt like he hadn’t seen in far too long. “You’re so fucking good at that,” he said as his eyes closed again and he lifted a hand to caress the side of Chester’s face. It took every ounce of willpower he had not to lift his hips and cause Chester to take him in deeper. He wanted to let him control the pace but the slow licks and sucks were killing him. 

Chester’s concentration was on the task at hand. He maneuvered himself a little closer, shoving Mike’s legs a little further apart. He wrapped his hand around his boyfriend’s length and made a twisting motion with his hand as he purposely let slobber roll down to act as a lubricant. Mike’s cock was already leaking, and the taste was sending stronger jolts of arousal through Chester’s lower half. He pulled back, his mouth dripping with a mix of spit and pre-cum. “You want more or you ready to move on?” he asked, his attention right on Mike’s face as lightning shot across the sky, brightening the room for a moment. 

“I want you naked with me,” Mike answered, trying to catch his breath. “You have far too much clothing on. Get those jeans off and get back down here with me.” He lifted himself up on his elbows to watch, feeling his dick twitch in anticipation as Chester’s hand moved to the front of his jeans. 

The rain continued outside as Chester kicked his shoes off, and a second later he had his jeans undone, and off along with his underwear. “I could have made that sexy,” he said with a teasing tone, “but you’re so impatient.” He got right back between Mike’s legs, but this time he was on top, pressing their naked bodies together as he kissed his boyfriend. His eyes were shut, his body ready to join with Mike’s as their fluids started to mix. He could already feel the tip of his dick poking around Mike’s bottom, but not having any accidental luck.

“Impatient,” Mike scoffed. “I can’t help it. I want you so bad it aches.” He ran his lips over Chester’s cheek and landed at his ear, breathing into it, “it’s been too long since I’ve had you inside of me.” He smiled before he sucked on the outside of his lover’s ear, feeling the shiver that ran through his body as he nipped the earlobe with his teeth. He tried to wiggle his legs open a little bit wider, hoping to encourage Chester to get things going. 

“I’m up for that,” Chester agreed, his hips pressing into Mike’s a little harder as his boyfriend nipped his ear. “Damn, I wish Brad had some cursed lube in the kitchen,” he muttered before he lifted himself up. “Now you’re really going to be impatient,” he said with almost a chuckle and a smile. “Stay here and I’ll be right back. I’m going to run upstairs. I swear I’ll be back in, like, ten seconds.” 

He knew Mike would protest, so he didn’t wait. If they were going to have sex, lube was necessary. Anything less would just equal Mike being uncomfortable and probably in pain. Chester dashed from the room - still totally nude other than his socks - and hurried through the house without a care in the world. After all, they were alone. He knew no one would be popping out from a closed room or around a corner. He wouldn’t hear someone calling his name or ordering him to change direction. He could get to his room, get what he needed and be back to Mike in no time. 

“Chesterrrrr,” Mike called through the house. “I’m dying!!” He reached down and wrapped his hand around his cock, giving it a few good strokes while he listened to Chester’s footsteps overhead. _He’s running like a madman if I can hear it over the rain._ He turned his face to the side and looked at the piano, then at the door. “Ches!” 

Had there been a sprinting contest for fetching lube from the upstairs bedroom, Chester would have won. He was back in the piano room before Mike could call him for a third time. His chest was pounding and his cheeks were flushed, but he was already smearing his cock with lube as he crossed the room. “I’m here,” he said, “and ready!” 

He dropped back down onto the blankets and between Mike’s still spread legs. He waited a second, catching his breath, keeping one hand on his cock, the other holding the lube. “You know, that staircase is a killer.” 

“Most people don’t take the stairs as quickly as you just did,” Mike pointed out, watching Chester with a smile. “Sorry to make you run. I just… you’re right. I’m impatient.” He made a face as he admitted his weakness. “Take your time,” he said sheepishly, trying not to squirm too much under Chester’s gaze. 

Chester let himself go as he rolled his eyes. “Take my time,” he repeated. “It’s too late for that.” He playfully nudged Mike’s leg before he smeared his fingers with the lube and then tossed it to the side with their pile of clothes. “We haven’t even done anything and I feel like I’m sweating already. So blaming you,” he laughed before his eyes dropped half closed, his focus hitting Mike’s cock and lower. He looked away for a second and with his clean hand, he grabbed for one of the pillows they’d brought in from the kitchen. “Here, put this under your hips,” he said, half tossing it to Mike’s chest. 

More eagerly than he wanted to admit, Mike lifted his butt and slid the pillow under it. He watched the way Chester’s face changed, the serious look that came over him as he ran a hand along Mike’s thigh and spread his legs apart, and he didn’t miss the little sigh that somehow escaped from his own lips. It was true, it had been a little while since he’d been under Chester’s hands this way. The only time they had made love in this house was an intense memory that Mike thought of often, especially on the weekends when they were finally able to collapse in that same bed upstairs, too exhausted to do much more than hold each other. It was before Mike had signed a contract and what happened between them was for the camera and not for them, and he remembered the way Chester had clung to him afterwards. They’d never been able to go back and put things right after that night, and Mike wanted to fix that memory now. With nobody else to hear them, to see them, to taint what was theirs, he wanted a fresh memory of Chester making love to him in this house, a middle finger to Mark and everything this place stood for. They could make love in this house and not let the shadows of YRS crowd into their intimacy. 

Chester carefully probed Mike’s opening with his finger, and when he heard the quick inhale from his lover, he remembered just how long it had been since he’d been on top of their love making. “Tell me if you need me to stop, I know it’s been awhile,” he whispered as he carefully wiggled his finger around inside Mike’s body. He leaned over his boyfriend’s stomach, leaving kisses there, around his belly button, and to each of his sides as he listened to each and every moan and gasp Mike was making. 

He was careful as he added a second finger, knowing that he needed to stretch his lover enough so that when the real thing happened, there wouldn’t be any pain. Or, at least not much. There was always a little, but that only led to the bliss after it. Chester did his best, counting on his experience and knowledge of Mike’s body to judge when he was ready, and after a few minutes of good finger play, he pulled out. His own cock was dripping and ready and it had been a long time since he’d gone so long without having sex, which was making everything feel twice as strong. 

Chester lined himself up as he guided his cock with his hand until he was right where he wanted. He pressed in a little, feeling the tight squeeze of Mike’s body, and his eyes shut. He knew his lover was feeling the uncomfortable sensation of having his muscles pulled, but to Chester, this was one of the best parts, as he pushed through the tightest circle of Mike’s opening. His hands were holding him up as he steadied himself over top his lover, holding himself back from pushing any further. “Are you okay?” he asked, dropping his head to see Mike’s face right under him. 

Mike nodded, his lips parted as he tried to get a deep breath. _Just another minute, and I’ll be fine. It’s been a while. Months._ His hands dug into the blankets below as he chanted to himself to relax, and he could feel Chester’s breaths on his face before he opened his eyes to reassure his lover. “Just a sec, Ches, give me just a sec.” 

He watched as Chester flicked his tongue out over his lip ring while staying perfectly still, and in another couple of breaths he felt a bit of a smile crack over his own lips. “Sorry… I guess that’s what I get for being impatient. I think you can move now, give it a try.” 

Chester pushed in a little further, making sure to go slow. He hesitated when he felt Mike’s body clench, but then everything relaxed a moment later and Chester let out a sigh of relief. He bent his head down to kiss Mike’s ear as he pushed more, letting the head of his dick sink all the way in. “I love you,” he whispered between kisses as he pulled back and then pushed in again. His knees were pressing into the blankets, and the rain seemed to be coming down even harder as he worked up a groove of thrusts and rhythms. 

It wasn’t going to take long, and Chester could already feel the mounting tension in his balls screaming to be released as he slid in and out of his lover. His heart was pounding, and the faster he went, the more violently his ball sack smacked against Mike’s bottom. “I’m not going to last,” Chester husked into Mike’s ear, his fingers gripping into the blankets. He wanted to hold out so that Mike could hit his orgasm first, but he wasn’t sure if that was going to happen. If he slowed down to delay his own orgasm, that would slow Mike’s down too, and Chester knew it. It was all about friction and hitting the right spots, and Chester could feel that he was on point with both of those. 

There was something about Chester’s voice that caused Mike’s heart to race faster, and he could feel that he was on the fringes of his own orgasm, that it wouldn’t take much more to get him there too. Everything felt elevated, magnified by ten as his boyfriend pounded into him. He wrapped a hand around Chester’s neck and turned into him, slanting their mouths together in a deep connection as his toes started to curl. Mike knew Chester could get him off this way, but it hadn’t happened in a while, and he wanted it to. He wanted them to hit their orgasm together, but he didn’t know if he was close enough. He shifted his hips a little, trying to help Chester hit that spot just a little harder that would send him over the edge. 

The slight shift in Mike’s hips - in his body - sent Chester’s penis just that one millimeter deeper, and it made all the difference. Chester felt the small opening of his slit bump against the soft wall of tissue inside Mike’s rectum, and that was it. In two quick thrusts, Chester pulled out of their kiss, his mouth hanging open as he felt the release flood from his scrotum, up through his length and out into his lover. It was hard and fast and his hips smashed into Mike’s with extra gusto as his cum shot out in two large bursts, one right after the other. He heard himself call Mike’s name in the midst of his body shaking and his knuckles turning pale as he gripped the blankets under him with every bit of strength he owned. 

It wasn’t quite enough for Mike but it didn’t matter. When Chester’s lips left his he opened his eyes to watch as he came, watch the moment he let go and moaned his name, and Mike couldn’t think of anything more beautiful than that moment of release. He was fascinated by the absolute pleasure that took over for a moment, and his entire soul was consumed with Chester and his love for him. This was everything he’d wanted back when he knew that Chester was the one, and there wasn’t room in his mind for YRS and the trappings that came with it.

He felt the slowing of Chester’s hips and he reached for his face, tenderly running his fingers down his boyfriend’s cheek as he watched him come down. “I love you, Ches,” he whispered, his own orgasm at the back of his mind for a moment. He was wrapped up in loving everything that was Chester Bennington; he’d get his in a minute. 

Chester’s heart was pounding as he let his body go still. His head was dropped next to Mike’s. “Did you get yours?” he mumbled, with his eyes closed. He hadn’t felt Mike release, but that didn’t always mean anything. Sometimes he recognized it, and sometimes he didn’t. 

“I was too busy watching you,” Mike said honestly, his cheeks flushing a bit. “But that’s okay, now you can watch me, if you want to.” He kissed the side of Chester’s face and hoped he wasn’t upset.

Chester opened his eyes before he picked his head up. “I get to watch?” he asked, a bit of excitement zipping into his tone. He was tired, and even though Mike hadn’t hit his orgasm with him, the idea of sitting back and watching Mike jerk himself off was ticking all kinds of boxes in Chester’s mind. He quickly kissed the side of Mike’s face before he went to pull out, which was already half done for him as his deflated cock had already started to wilt. “Hang on,” he said before he slowly backed up, and he watched as Mike squirmed just a little as he exited. 

“You okay?” Chester asked immediately as the air hit his dick and his bottom hit the blankets. 

“Oh yeah,” Mike mumbled, and it was mostly true. He hated that moment when his body felt so empty, but he wasn’t going to focus on that. He caught the sparkle of interest in Chester’s eyes as he wrapped his right hand around his cock. “You look like you may have thought about this before,” he teased, biting down on his bottom lip as he made a few experimental strokes. 

Chester grabbed one of the nearby pillows and laid down on his side, his face right in range for a front seat view of what his boyfriend was about to do. “Sexy Boy, the list of things I’ve thought about for us to do together is so long, we can’t even talk about it right now.” He grinned up at Mike before he reached over and snatched the bottle of lube. “You want?” 

“Lube me up,” Mike said, matching Chester’s grin. The act of participating in smearing Mike’s hand with the lube gave his boyfriend an even more excited face, and Mike couldn’t help but chuckle at him. “You’re ridiculously cute,” he said, taking a breath and refocusing on the task at hand. He took a minute, finding a good pace as he slipped his hand up and down, over the head and back again, tugging a bit here and there and building himself back up to where he’d been a few minutes ago. 

“Before I started sleeping at your place, this is how every date ended,” he admitted breathlessly, turning to crack his eyes and look at Chester. “You made me fucking crazy. I’d never wanted anyone the way I wanted you. That’s how I knew.” He didn’t wait for a response, letting his mouth drop open in a silent moan as he felt the tightening of his stomach and the pull in his balls. He ran through snapshots of Chester in his head, the way he’d done back before they’d ever had sex, but now his mental images were colored with the way his boyfriend looked in the throes of passion; his head thrown back and the long lines of his neck showing, the way his eyes pinched shut so tightly and his mouth dropped open, the way he called Mike’s name like it was a prayer. He didn’t even have the mental capacity to be embarrassed at how little time it took for him to hit his orgasm at the work of his own hands. It shot through him so fast he barely had time to take a breath before he was releasing thick streams of cum across his stomach and over his hand, and he gasped Chester’s name while he let it roll over him.

Chester’s eyes hadn’t left Mike’s hand. He’d watched as his boyfriend had skillfully brought his own body to submission and without thought, Chester’s hand had been on Mike’s outer thigh the whole time. He pressed his fingers lightly over the soft leg hair now as he looked up at Mike’s flushed face and dark eyes. “You’re amazing, you know that?” he asked, just before a crack of thunder boomed outside the windows, rattling them. Chester bolted to an upright position, his face blanched as he looked out at the rain. 

Mike let his hand drop to the side. “It’s okay,” he said, his voice tired. “We’re inside. And I feel like I’ve run a marathon.” He smiled lazily up at his boyfriend. “I can’t believe we did this right here. We’re so bad.” Every place on his body felt sticky and even though he didn’t have enough strength to stand at that moment, he knew he needed a shower. 

“Bad in a good way,” Chester corrected before he let out a yawn. “I vote we go shower, and then lay in bed and pass out till we have to get up. Sound like a plan?” he asked, looking down at Mike’s face as he walked his fingers playfully up his arm before tickling the side of his neck. 

“You read my mind.” Mike sighed and caught Chester’s wandering hand. “I love you, Ches.” Even though there had been a few light moments in the piano room, Mike felt compelled to make sure Chester knew it. He sat up gingerly and gestured to his bottom half. “Care to get me a towel before we go upstairs?” 

“Sure,” Chester answered easily as he yawned again. He went to stand up, his knees aching a bit from where they’d been pressed into the hard floor. “You know, you should count yourself as special, Mr. Shinoda,” Chester said as he headed for the doorway. “You’re the only one I’ve ever had sex with during a thunderstorm.” He flashed Mike a quick smile before he disappeared out into the hallway. 

Mike smiled and closed his eyes. _That’s the biggest compliment he could ever give me. He feels that safe with me._ He couldn’t wait to get a shower and snuggle up in bed while it rained. It had been a long week. 

****  
TBC


	35. A Harsh Dose of Reality

Another week away from YRS had passed by in a blur, and Mike couldn’t believe he was already walking back in the front doors of the big house again. _It’s been a better week, though. Things have been good at home. This will be an easy weekend. Ches has been more like himself since that day it stormed._ Memories of their lovemaking in the piano room filtered through his mind slowly and Mike smiled to himself. _Fuck Mark. He can’t have everything between us. He doesn’t get anything important, just what we show him._ He squeezed his boyfriend’s hand reassuringly as they made their way inside, pausing to greet Adam before they headed upstairs to drop off their bags. 

The air in their bedroom felt stale, and Mike crossed over to the window to let some fresh air in. The window slid up easily and he stood there for a minute, looking out over the pool, wondering where they’d be shooting this weekend. He hadn’t seen a script yet. “Hey, Ches? Are we on this morning or afternoon? Do you know?” 

Chester was at the closet, making sure everything was still in order. “This morning, I thought. Not sure,” he mumbled before he shut the closet door and turned around. He let out a long breath as he stared at Mike’s back, and the way his boyfriend was looking out the window at the bright morning sun. “I like shooting in the mornings,” Chester said as he crossed the room and stood behind Mike, wrapping his arms around his lover’s waist. He leaned his chin on the shoulder of Mike’s flannel shirt. “It gets it out of the way, so then the rest of the day is free and open.” 

“Yeah… I guess.” There was never a time of day that Mike could say he _liked_ to get their work done. It still made his skin crawl when he thought about it too much, so he tried not to think about what they did in terms of timing and cameras. It was easier to pretend those cameras weren’t there, to let himself imagine he and Chester were alone. It was the complete opposite of how Chester approached their shoots, but it was the only way it worked for him.

He held onto Chester’s arms around his stomach and closed his eyes. “You probably want to go downstairs, huh? Talk to the guys a little bit?” He knew being with the others was something Chester enjoyed, the little social interactions they had that weren’t porn related. Even though he’d rather hide away in their room until it was time for them to work, Mike wanted to make Chester happy. He wanted him to be relaxed and comfortable. 

Chester turned his head and kissed Mike’s neck before he let him go and took a step back. “We should. Find out what’s going on for the day. I like knowing. Surprises aren’t my thing. . .here,” he added before he held out his hand for his boyfriend to take. 

Mike laughed under his breath as he grabbed the offered hand. “I know. Okay, lead the way, babe. Maybe we can get a snack while we’re at it,” he said hopefully.

Chester smiled as he led them out of the room and into the hallway. “Answer me this, Sexy Boy, how can you always be so hungry? We just ate eggs and hashbrowns and toast and you even had sausage with yours,” he said, glancing Mike’s way. “Maybe you have a tapeworm. Have you thought about that? Brad had one once. He ate, like, non-stop for two weeks until he finally went to the doctor, or, well, it was a witch doctor, but still! They figured out it was a tapeworm!” 

“I DO NOT have a tapeworm,” Mike fussed, waving his free hand around. “Witch doctors? I swear, Brad is so weird.” He lowered his voice and leaned closer to Chester. “He didn’t find out about the blankets and pillows, right? I mean, not that I believe in all that. But I don’t want to give him any more reason to freak out about stuff.” Mike looked around as they walked through the house, ready to change the subject if anyone got close enough to overhear them. 

Chester shook his head as they headed toward the kitchen. “Not that I know of,” he said, “but you shouldn’t dismiss the tapeworm theory. We can ask Brad, if you want? He might be able to get a reading on your belly,” he decided quickly as he stopped their walk long enough to lay his hand over Mike’s stomach. 

“We are not asking Brad about tapeworms,” Mike said firmly. “I’m fine. I’ve always eaten a lot. Do you think I eat too much?” he asked suddenly, a little bit of worry creeping into his voice. “My mom used to tell me I should be careful or I would puff out like the Pillsbury Doughboy. I don’t want to be fat, Ches.” He looked down at Chester’s hand on his stomach, his mouth twisted into a frown. He didn’t think he was fat, but he definitely wasn’t as cut as the other boys, and not even close to Chester. 

“It’s only too much if there’s a tapeworm eating half of it,” Chester said before he leaned in and plopped a kiss on Mike’s cheek. “I love the way you look,” he whispered. “I just don’t want there to be something wrong.”

Mike bit down on his lower lip. “I’m pretty sure there’s nothing wrong. But now you’re making me think about tapeworms and stuff, and I don’t want to talk about it anymore. Let’s go see what the schedule is like. I’ll skip the snack.” 

Chester’s face dropped to a frown as guilt washed over him. He didn’t want Mike to feel bad. He loved his body, and so did a lot of other people. Mike was an official, professional porn star. Chester kept an eye on their ratings, on the comments about their movies and scenes by the fans. People loved Mike, and part of what they loved was that he wasn’t wafer thin. “Okay,” he said, “no more tapeworm talk. Come on, we’ll go find Jason.” He nodded for Mike to follow, and together they headed away from the kitchen. “And you know, you shouldn’t worry about how you look. I’m not the only one who finds you sexy.” 

There was no way to stop the blush that spread over Mike’s cheeks as Chester reminded him that his boyfriend wasn’t the only person who got to see him naked. He tried not to think about that part. “Shhh,” he admonished, looking around the house. “You’re the only person who matters anyway,” he said as he almost ran right into Ryan. 

“Oh, sorry, Mike,” Ryan said, taking a step back before his eyes refocused on Chester. “Hey, Chazzy,” he offered. “So guess what.”

“What?” Chester asked, and already he was feeling the serious concern of just a moment ago vanishing. Ryan was a gossip, and Chester could tell that he had something good to tell. 

Ryan tugged on the front of his tight fitting black t-shirt before he looked around, like he was making sure they were alone. “There’s going to be a new guy,” he said, keeping his voice low. “I haven’t seen him yet, but Jay says he’s a redhead. He’s touring him around the house right now, so be ready for _introductions_ later,” he said with an eye roll. 

“I’m not shocked,” Chester answered. “I knew they’d bring more people in to replace Toby and Josh.” 

“Ugh,” Mike sighed. “I mean, you’re right, Ches, but I hate the idea of having new people around.” What he didn’t say was that he’d finally started to get somewhat comfortable in front of the guys he knew. Adding new people into the mix just made him anxious again, like it was his first time in front of the camera.

“He won’t be the last,” Chester was quick to say. “You have to have bodies to make money, and the more bodies you have, the more you make,” he recited. “When I first started, there were twelve couples here. Well, not couples, but pairs,” he corrected, and Ryan nodded. 

“Yeah, that’s right. There used to be a lot more of us. They’ve really pared it down the last year or so. I don’t know why, because that’s exactly what Mark always says - more bodies means more money.” 

They were stopped in the hallway next to the piano room, and Mike let his mind drift while Chester and Ryan tossed around theories about why there were less people at YRS lately. He could clearly see the space under the windows, next to the piano, where they had been together the weekend before. _Right there, right out in the open. I can’t believe I did that._ It had been exactly what they needed, though, and Mike didn’t regret it for an instant. He was still staring into the room when he felt Chester nudge him with his elbow.

“We got time if you want to go play,” Chester said, his eyes darting between Mike and the piano. “Tours take forever, and then we all have to sit down with the new guy and introduce ourselves and help him out and, yeah. We won’t be doing anything till later.” 

“Only if you’re coming too,” Mike said, cutting his eyes back over to Chester with a wink. “How about some jazz?” 

A smile hit Chester’s face. “You know me, I’m always up for some sexy jazz.” He bowed, offering for Mike to go first, and he was quick to follow behind him when he did. They walked into the piano room, and Mike was already sitting down, wiggling his fingers over the keys to get them ready as Chester stood behind him. “Play something you know I like,” he said, tracing a finger over the back of Mike’s neck and cracking a sly smile when he saw his lover shiver. 

“Don’t distract me,” Mike muttered as he felt his way around a few chord progressions, deciding what to play. “You’ll make it where I can’t think if you keep that up.” He launched into a tune that he thought Chester would find suitably sexy, dropping his head to concentrate on his fingers. Modern music wasn’t as deeply ingrained in him as the classical stuff; he actually had to pay attention.

“But this is more fun,” Chester teased before he looked over. Ryan hadn’t followed them in. He was still in view, just outside the piano room with his head down, texting or reading something on his phone. Chester’s attention shot right back to Mike’s neck, and the soft skin that was begging him to touch it. “It’s, like, I can’t help myself,” Chester half giggled as he smoothed his fingers over Mike’s neck, and up around his left ear. “Must be this room.” 

Mike grinned as his hands went over the keys but it dropped away suddenly as Chester found the spot behind his ear. It was an instant turn on, and he fumbled a bit on the song before he recovered himself. “You’re so naughty,” he said, just loud enough for Chester to hear him. It took every ounce of willpower he had not to turn around and tackle his lover to the floor.

“Mhm,” Chester agreed as he bent down and kissed Mike’s neck before he hovered right by his ear. “But you’ve known that since the beginning.” He knew he was being extra bad, but he couldn’t help himself. He was having fun, despite being at YRS. He was feeling good, and he was still feeling the high of life being back to normal ever since last weekend. “Got room on this bench for me?” he asked just before Mike turned his head. Chester didn’t hesitate. His eyes shut, and he pressed their lips together, his hand leaving Mike’s neck and drifting up to the back of his head as he massaged his boyfriend’s hair. 

It was amazing that Mike kept his hands moving even as they kissed. He felt joyful for the moment, and that feeling was something that didn’t happen often at YRS. He let the upbeat jazz offering slow into something different, something more romantic that he didn’t have to think about as he pressed his lips forward, seeking more contact and more of Chester’s love. 

Their romantic kiss didn’t last long. Jason picked that moment to walk into the piano room, coming to an abrupt halt as his eyes landed on Mike and Chester at the piano. He’d heard Mike playing, but he didn’t know he’d be interrupting a moment between them. _It’s like they’re trying to make me feel guiltier than I already do._ He looked back over his shoulder at Ryan, who offered no help as he shrugged his shoulders, and then cleared his throat. Loudly.

He watched the surprise interruption cause Mike to quickly release Chester’s lips, his cheeks turning bright pink. “Mike, Chaz… sorry to interrupt, I was just showing Noah around. You can, ah, keep playing, Mike, if you want.” 

Chester had taken a step back, his hands at his sides, brushing the legs of his jeans as he looked from Mike, over to his boss and Noah - the boy with red hair and freckles on his face. Chester sized him up quickly, taking in his broader build and bright, wide eyes as he followed Jason the rest of the way into the room. Noah had on jeans and a t-shirt that lifted up enough to show the skin of his belly every time he moved. He wasn’t super tall, and mentally Chester flipped through their current roster, trying to assess who would end up being partnered with him. _Or threesomes. Mark might put him in with one of our other pairs until he can get new guy number two in here. . ._

“I think I’m done for a while,” Mike said, closing the lid over the keys and glancing at Chester. His boyfriend didn’t look the least bit upset at the interruption. 

Jason looked over both his employees and forced a smile as he turned to Noah. “Well, Noah, this is the piano room. The place you’re most likely to find Mike in his off time.” Mentally, Jason cringed at his own words. “And this is Chester, his boyfriend. Chaz has been with us a few years, and Mike a few months.” He sort of feathered his hand in the direction of the piano and stopped, waiting for Mike or Chester to welcome the new boy into the group. 

“Oh, I know who they are,” Noah piped up first. He took a step forward as he looked from Mike to Chester. “I love your movies. I’ve seen them all,” he told them excitedly. He’d seen Chester in a lot of YRS videos, but it wasn’t until Mike showed up that he really started to take interest. “You guys together is so amazing. And, you’re really together, like, for real,” he practically squealed, his hands out in front of him shaking a little, like he wanted to reach out and touch them. “But by far my favorite thing you guys have done is the new scene. The one in this room that just went up the other day. And I know it said you guys were really together in the description, but it’s porn, you know? Who believes anything captions say, but it’s true!” 

He took another step toward the piano. “You guys let it be so real. . .” he whispered in awe. “Was it _all_ real?” he asked, his mind racing over every detail he’d seen play out in front of him at home, from the safety of his computer and his bedroom. “You really play the piano, that’s so cool,” he said, gazing over Mike’s hands and his dark eyes that were looking right back at him. “And you said in the video that he’s the only one you’ve ever been with, like, ever.” Noah pointed at Chester before he looked back at Mike, a look of unbelief scrawled across his face. “Is that for real?” He waited a second, his heart pounding with enthusiasm as he looked from Mike’s gaping mouth back over to Chester, who had mirrored Mike’s expression. “It _is_ true!” Noah practically shouted. “I’ll be damned! That makes everything you guys do, like, twice as hot! And do you really call him Sexy Boy?” he had to ask next, his smile about to bust off his face as he scanned Chester up and down. “And, are you really scared of thunder? Please tell me that part was true, too, because it was so fucking’ cute!” Noah could feel the excitement zipping through him as he bounced from foot to foot while he waited. He had been intrigued by the honesty he’d seen on screen between Mike and Chester, but now he _had_ to know if all the little conversations and details he’d seen were as authentic as the love making. 

It was a good thing Mike was still sitting at the piano bench. He felt his blood drain to his toes in panicked disbelief as Noah rambled on and on, and Jason covered his mouth with his hand. His legs were shaking as his mind tried to make sense of what he was hearing. They’d never had a shoot where he played piano. They’d never had a shoot where Chester called him Sexy Boy, and they’d never had a shoot in a storm. But all of those things had happened last weekend, right in this room. This very room, where Mike had been so totally sure they were alone, where he’d been so confident that it was just him and Chester that they’d kissed and touched, been naked and made love out in the open, and it was just for them. Theirs. Love, not porn. He looked at Chester, whose face was paler than he’d ever seen it. 

Jason reached out, pulling Noah back next to him. “That’s enough,” he said, his voice shaky. He knew when Mark had stood over him, forcing him to edit the footage from the hidden camera in the room, that what he was doing was wrong, but Mark hadn’t given him a choice. He directed each cut and each scene break as though it was all normal video footage, all part of a regular day at work. Even though Jason knew Chester kept tabs on his videos with Mike, he didn’t want them to find out this way. He knew he should have called Chester, or even Mike, and given them a heads up. The shock on both of their faces turned his stomach.

“Oh, oh, I’m sorry,” Noah apologized quickly. “I didn’t mean to sound like a fanboy,” he told Chester and Mike, looking from one to the other. “Your work is just, touching. And I mean that in the best way. You guys are inspiring in this business,” he added just as Jason scooped an arm around his back and turned him around. “Okay, maybe we’ll talk later!” Noah had to say over his shoulder as he tried to wave to his favorite couple. 

“Ryan!” Jason hollered out toward the hallway as he pushed Noah toward the door. “Take Noah out and show him the pool area.” He left no room for negotiation as he tried to think of what to do, what to say, to salvage the situation.

“Okay,” Ryan agreed, even as he looked around his boyfriend and the new guy to try and see Chester. _Fuck. What was that all about?_ He looked at Noah and smiled. “Right that way,” he said, pointing toward the hallway. “I’ll be there in a minute.” He turned quickly to Jason. “Is Chaz okay?” he had to ask. “What the hell just happened?” 

“Don’t,” Jason said, a warning in his voice as he met Ryan’s concerned eyes. “Just… please, Ry, take Noah out and shut the door behind you. Please,” he said again, needing his lover to just trust him for a minute. 

Ryan looked from Jason’s pleading brown eyes to back in the piano room, where Chester looked crushed, and Mike’s hands were wound tight, like he was ready to kill someone. “Okay,” he finally agreed, looking back at his lover. “Because you asked me to.” He turned around, shutting the door as he went to go catch up with Noah.

There was a long silence while Mike sorted through his thoughts. _There’s no way. No way he’s talking about last weekend. There just can’t be. We were alone. I know we were._ He looked at Chester, but the look on his face told Mike he believed one hundred percent that Noah had been talking about their personal time. He still hadn’t moved from the place he’d frozen as the new boy was talking. 

Mike fixed his eyes on Jason’s stricken face and took a deep breath. “Is it true? What he said?” There was something low and dangerous in Mike’s voice then, but he had to know for certain before he lost his mind. There was still a piece of him that couldn’t believe what was happening.

When Jason didn’t say anything immediately, the last thread of sanity Mike was holding on to snapped. “Tell me!” he shouted, standing up with his fists clenched. “Tell me what he’s talking about!”

Chester jumped the moment Mike raised his voice. His heart was pounding as he tried to understand what had happened. _How could that guy know? All that stuff. . .we were in here. There’s no cameras in here._ He looked at Mike, who was turned away from him as he stared Jason down. “Mike,” Chester whispered, “don’t.” But he didn’t have it in him to say anything more. His heart hurt as he covered his mouth and shut his eyes. There was so much personal information and habits that had been shared between him and Mike during that thunderstorm, and somehow it hadn’t been as private as they’d thought. 

Mike whirled around to face Chester. “What? _Don’t?_ Don’t what? Don’t force him to admit to stealing our time together?” His eyes flipped back to Jason, fury evident on his face. “Tell me what you did! Tell me, Jason, damn it, _you’re the one who makes the videos!_ Did you put up a video of us from this room?” He knew he was shouting but Jason wasn’t saying anything, and Mike was about to force it out of him if necessary. At the moment there was no consideration for Jason being his boss.

“I didn’t want to, okay?” Jason shouted, his professional demeanor gone. “Why in the _fuck_ did you two have to have sex in this room? Of all the places in the house you could have gone, why was it in here?” He knew that trying to turn the blame around on Mike and Chester wouldn’t work, but he didn’t know what else to say with Mike looking like he was so close to completely losing it.

“We were alone!” Mike yelled back, frustrated with Jason’s answer and Chester’s silence. “How could you, Jason? After you came to our place and acted like you understood us, how could you turn around and put something so fucking personal up on the site? You have no fucking conscience, you know that?” He slammed his fist down on the top of the piano, not missing the way Chester flinched at the sound. 

Jason held both his hands up and took a step back. “He made me do it, Mike. I swear, I would have never, never done that on my own. And I know I should have told you both, but I didn’t know how. I was going to tell you today, and then Mark sprung the new kid on me, and I didn’t know he was such a _fanboy_ ,” Jason spit out with disgust. “I’m sorry, I know, I know you guys didn’t know.”

“But it’s _ours_ , Jason, all of it. It’s not a shoot Mark can do whatever he wants with! We didn’t consent to that. Take it down,” he said suddenly, his eyes locked onto Jason’s face. “You can do that, you run this fucking place. Take it down. It’s ours. It’s private.” 

Chester felt his head starting to spin. He hated everything that was happening. The idea that so much of their personal lives was out for the world to see, that Mark and YRS were making money off of it, that Jason hadn’t been able to stop it from happening, but most of all, he hated that Mike was yelling. That he was so upset and losing control. Losing control was dangerous. Chester’s hand slid to his forehead for a second before he felt his legs go weak, and a second later he was on the floor, breathing hard and holding himself as he hid his face.

“God damn it!” Mike swore as he saw Chester crumble to the ground. He was next to him in a flash, his anger on hold as he ran his hand over Chester’s back and touched his forehead. “Ches? Babe, are you okay? What happened?” He didn’t think Chester had passed out, but he clearly wasn’t feeling well.

Jason took a step in their direction and Mike’s head snapped up. “Stay away from him. Don’t fucking come over here,” he growled, stopping Jason in his tracks. “You’ve done enough.” 

Chester tried to nod as he let Mike hold him. “Yeah, I’m okay. . .just lost my happy thoughts there for a minute,” he mumbled. He tried to wet his lips to help his hoarse voice, but everything felt dry, like he had zero liquid in his body. “I think I need some water,” he said, as he shifted around to sit on his bottom. 

Mike looked up at Jason and then back at Chester. “Okay, okay. I’ll go get you some.” He stood up and glared at Jason. “Don’t you go anywhere. I’m not done with you.” He spun on his heel and took off for the kitchen, not intending to be gone for very long.

Jason stood awkwardly in the center of the room, unsure what to do with his hands, afraid to get any closer to Chester the way Mike was acting. _I don’t blame him,_ he thought as he hung his head to stare at the floor. _He’s right, none of that was ever intended to be shared. It’s not fair. Mark is wrong for this… but so am I. I’m the one that edited it. And they know that. They know what I’ve seen. I’d die if that were me and Ryan._ He glanced up at the ceiling and then back down at Chester. _I should have said something. I should have warned them._

“Chaz?” he said tentatively, his eyes shooting to the door to make sure Mike wasn’t close by. “Chaz, I’m sorry. You know how Mark is… I had to. I had to do it.” 

Chester looked up. He rubbed one of his eyes before he let out a long breath. “I know,” he said, his voice still shaky. “Why does he have to do it?” he asked as he looked away from his boss and down at the floor. “Things were just getting good again, and now. . .I don’t want to lose Mike.”

“I’m sorry,” Jason said again, knowing nothing he could say would be enough. “It’s all just control, Chaz. He does it because he can.” 

Chester pulled his legs up to his chest, burying his face into his knees. _I know. I should have known better. I should have known something was going to go wrong. Mike’s never going to get over it, and I know Mark will never take it down from the site. We belong to him._

Mike burst into the kitchen on a mission. He needed a glass of water quickly. _He’s a mess. I can’t leave him in there by himself. I don’t even know where Mark is._ His heart was pounding and he could feel the adrenaline coursing through him. _I can’t believe this. I just can’t. Jason has to take it down. He can do that. He understands. He said he understands._ He opened the cabinet and took down a plastic cup, turning back to the refrigerator to fill it with ice and water. In less than a minute he was headed back to the piano room, working on what he could say to convince Jason to take down the video. 

He was deep in concentration when he heard Mark call his name, and he skidded to a stop in the hallway just outside the piano room door, which was hanging open by a small crack. He whipped around to see the boss behind him. 

“Mike, glad I caught you,” Mark said, a pleased smile across his face as he stood dressed rather formally in a dress shirt and tie. “I just wanted to say that I heard you playing the piano earlier, and you know, it really brings a classy touch to this place.” He turned and motioned around him. “You’ve got a lot of talent.” 

Mike wanted to throw the cup of water in Mark’s face. “Are you serious right now? You want to talk to me about talent _right now_? You have a lot of nerve, you know that?” he hissed. 

Mark’s bright smile dimmed. “Now, Michael, calm down,” he said in his smooth voice, his eyes flashing over his employee’s shoulder toward the partially opened door to the piano room before he let out a sigh. “I know we’ve had our differences,” he started, but he stopped the moment he saw Mike’s free hand ball into a fist. He took a step back. “I guess you’ve seen the latest video up on the YRS site? _Your_ latest video.” 

“You had no right!” Mike said, trying not to yell. He didn’t want Chester to hear the confrontation. “None of that, NONE of it, was meant to be seen! I don’t… how did you even do that? How did you even get video of us?” 

Mark’s eyes narrowed as the wrinkles on his forehead showed. “I’ve taken a lot of shit from you,” he said, his voice dropping all pleasantries. “So let’s get one thing very clear right now.” He took a step forward as he pointed his finger at Mike’s chest. “You work for me. You’re in my house. You had sex in _my_ house on _my_ time. You and Chaz were on the clock, so everything you two did belongs to me. Everything. And if you must know, we have cameras in that room,” he said, his pointing finger moving to aim at the door to the piano room, “because we’ve had people steal from us in the past, and for whatever reason, that room is a favorite. Antiques, paintings, you name it,” he hissed, “so we set up cameras. Good cameras that capture everything.” He put his hands on his hips as he shook his head. “What you two did was magic, Mike. It’s what people want to see. It’s already blowing off the charts because people know it’s real. They can tell.” 

“Of course it’s real!” Mike shouted, unable to control himself as Mark rambled on. “I love him, and it’s real! You wouldn’t know a thing about that, that’s not what you’re about! And you can’t just, take video you have that we didn’t consent to, and use it! That’s not how it works, I don’t care what you think. I want it off the site, it’s not yours!” He flipped his free hand toward the piano room and then pointed his finger at Mark. “So what if it was in your house? It’s _not_ porn. You’re stealing from us!”

Mark shook his head, a sick laugh escaping his throat. “You’re so naive sometimes. It kills me. I’m not sure why it still surprises me.” He waited a minute, watching as his employee kept their eye contact. “You’re a porn star, Mike. And so is Chaz. He’s been a porn star for a long time, and he’s going to keep being one. And you’re at YRS, where we make porn. Good porn. Quality porn. And I know you like to separate it, but that’s not how it works.” He took a step forward, using his height and broader shoulders to be as intimidating as he could be. “Chaz belongs to me, you know that, don’t you? He was mine first, and he’s going to be mine long after you’re gone. You should be grateful I let you stay here. . .that I let you do as much as you do with him. Don’t push me, Michael,” he warned, making sure his hot breath hit his employee’s face. “I can fire you. I can kick you out of my loft. I can make sure Chaz is here every single day. And if you really want to get nasty, now I’ve got you making a death threat on film.” 

Mark smiled before he took a step back, pleased with what he’d just said. He could already see the look on Mike’s face, the same look all the boys got when push really came to shove. This was YRS, and Mark was in control and they all knew it. 

Mike’s heart was racing, his lips parted as he struggled to breathe. “I… I didn’t mean that,” he said, his voice losing its angry edge. “I just, we…” he looked toward the piano room, thinking of Chester on the floor inside. “I…” He was suddenly at a loss for words. He knew what Mark was saying was true. He could fire Mike in a heartbeat, and then what would happen to Chester? A wave of frustration, chased by sadness and fear overcame him, and he looked down at the cup of water in his hand. There was only one correct decision to make, he realized, and if Chester were there next to him, he’d be looking at Mike with his pleading eyes, begging him to just say the right words. 

He bit down on his bottom lip to keep the frustrated tears at bay, the shame at what he was about to do overwhelming him. “I’m sorry, sir,” he finally said quietly, keeping his head down. “Thank you for complimenting my piano playing…”

“That’s better,” Mark said, victory showing in his tone as he reached out and patted Mike’s shoulder. “Chaz really likes you, so I don’t want to have to send you away. And the fans enjoy what the two of you do. Money, Mike, it’s all about money. When I make more money, you and Chaz get to have a better life, so be happy,” he insisted before he pulled his hand back. “Now, I believe I have a new boy to help show around. I expect it to be a great weekend.” 

Mike didn’t look up to watch Mark turn away. He stood in the hallway, his stomach hurting, his palms feeling clammy. _I fucking hate him. And I did mean it. I want to kill him._ It felt like a lot of effort to push open the door, so he just stood there for a minute, the feeling of defeat weighing him down. _Ches is right. It’s not just him, I can’t really do anything either. No matter how many times I tell him I’ll protect him, Mark will just fire me if I’m not careful. I can’t get fired._ It was another worry to add to an ever growing list.

He could hear Jason saying something to Chester and he forced his feet to move. Chester was still on the floor when he went back inside, not bothering to shut the door behind him. There was no point in trying to keep secrets. “Here,” he said, kneeling on the floor next to his boyfriend. “Sorry I took so long.” 

Chester took the water and immediately gulped half of it down. He sat with his mouth open, breathing a little hard as he looked over at Mike. “I’m sorry,” he apologized. “About last weekend. I should have known better. . .” He wanted to explain himself better, but he wasn’t sure how. 

“Shhh,” Mike quieted him gently. “It’s not your fault. We both should have thought about it.” He sat down on the floor, his knees touching Chester’s. “Just drink your water, Ches, so we can go upstairs. You should lay down for a minute.” He heard Jason move behind him, and he turned to look up at him.

“Mike, why don’t you take Chaz home?” Jason said, watching Mike’s eyebrows furrow in confusion. “It’s obvious he’s not feeling well. Right, Chaz?” Jason looked at them both meaningfully, trying to get one or both of them to hear the unspoken words he was saying. 

Chester nodded. “Can we? Jason, yeah, that would be great. I’m sorry,” he said as he held his cup of water. “Mike’s right, I need to lay down. I think my sugar is low or something,” he offered. 

Mike smoothed a hand over Chester’s forehead, catching on to what was happening. “You feel a little warm, too, Ches.” He looked at Jason. “If you’re giving us permission to go… that’s enough, right?” After the conversation he’d just had with Mark, he wasn’t entirely sure.

“I’ll talk to Mark,” Jason said, nodding his head. “But if Chester is sick, you need to go home. We can’t have everyone coming down with it.” He looked back at Mike, hoping he’d understand that this was the only way he could try to make up for the awful thing he’d done. “I’ll take care of it.” 

“Okay.” Mike got to his feet and looked at Chester, at how small he looked on the floor. He couldn’t even imagine the things that had gone on at YRS before he’d been there. “Come on, babe. I’ll drive. Let’s get you home.” 

****

The drive home was silent. Chester was leaned back in the passenger seat, one of Mike’s shirts over his eyes to keep the sun out. Mike glared out the windshield. _I fucking hate Mark. And he’s got me on tape, talking about self-defense. If anything ever happens to him, the police will come looking for me._ He felt his shoulders sag. _I’ve always been a good kid. I’ve never been in any trouble. And now… now I work in porn and want to kill my boss._ He couldn’t bring himself to call himself a porn star. He didn’t even know if he was a star, and he wasn’t about to look at the hits and ratings to find out.

_If I hear one more person in that place call him ‘Chaz’ I might punch them out._ Mike rolled his eyes at himself. _Like I could. I’d probably lose against anyone there. Except Chester._ He looked sideways at his boyfriend and felt his heart ache. _He’s so small. I never noticed it before, but compared to everyone there… he’s delicate. No wonder Mark chose him. Of course he’d pick someone he can overpower. No wonder Ches was so aggressive when we met. That’s all he knew. Taking what he wanted when he wanted it._

He focused on the road in front of him. _He’s changed so much. I’ve changed. I never thought this would be my life. I wish I could get us out of it. I wish I could take him away. But he won’t even listen to me._ Mike carefully parked Chester’s prized red sportscar next to his old blue Civic. _We could just leave it all behind. Take my car and just go._

“Ches? Babe… we’re home.” He turned off the car and reached over to gently pet Chester’s arm.

The drive back from YRS hadn’t seemed nearly long enough as Chester dropped Mike’s shirt from his eyes. He wanted to be home, but he didn’t want to get out of the car and make the trek up to the loft either. “Good,” he managed to say as he sat up and rubbed his eyes. He was still feeling nauseous, and dreading moving at all. 

Mike kept feathering his fingers over Chester’s arm as he looked outside, mentally judging the distance from the car to the front door of the building, and whether or not Chester was going to walk that far. He looked awful. “You think you’ll make it upstairs? You still don’t look well. We should get you into bed.” 

“I’ll make it,” Chester said, letting out a long breath. “Just walk with me, okay?” he looked over at his boyfriend, and watched as Mike nodded in agreement. “And yeah, I need to lay down. . .just for a little bit.”

It was easy to forget his own shock and anger when he focused on Chester, and Mike was out of the car and around to the passenger side to open the door before Chester had finished his sentence. _He looks like he’s going to be sick. I fucking hate that place. Fuck everyone there._ He opened the door and held out his hand for Chester to take. “I’ll be right beside you, every step. Come on.” 

Chester let himself be helped out of the car before he slung an arm around Mike’s waist. They headed for the building and Chester concentrated on his steps, before he said, “Can you believe that new kid? I can’t believe he had the nerve to ask us that stuff.” He shut his eyes for a second, allowing Mike to take total control of their forward motion. “I hate sounding like a cranky old man, but I would never act like that around someone, or ask those things. He said he liked that it was real, but I don’t think he realizes what that means.” 

Mike grit his teeth as Chester leaned into his body and they made slow progress into the building. With more force than necessary he stabbed the elevator button with one finger before he finally said, “he’s got a lot of nerve. I don’t want to hear about it from any of them. There’s so much personal stuff in there, Ches. It’s as bad as if there were cameras in the loft.” He stopped suddenly, a chill coming over him. “Chester. Mark wouldn’t do that, would he? Have cameras here? It’s his place, how would we ever know?” 

The idea hit Chester like a smack in the face. He stood himself up a little straighter, leaning off of his lover. “No,” he said, but then he looked away, down the hallway as they waited for the elevator. “I mean, I don’t think so. Fuck, Mike,” he whined as he looked back his way. “I have no idea.” He could feel his heart starting to race, and he put a hand to his chest. “He would know everything. He would have seen. . .everything.” His mind dashed back through time as he tried to remember if Mark had ever made any off comments - clues that he knew things he shouldn’t, but nothing came to mind. 

“You’re right,” Mike said, a tone of relief in his voice. “Ches, babe, you’re right. He’d know about Jason and Ryan. There’s no way he’d just let that go.” He let out a sigh and pulled Chester close into his side. “I’m sorry… I just… I don’t know if I’ll ever feel like we aren’t being watched.” The elevator opened and Mike pulled Chester along with him. “I’m sorry, I’m just freaking out right now. I can’t stand this. It’s making me sick.” 

Chester nodded in agreement as the elevator lurched upward, and he grabbed his stomach. “I just want to be home. In our bed. I still can’t believe they did that. That Jason did it. . .I guess it’s not so hard to believe,” he corrected as his boss’s face flashed into his mind. “You should have heard him after you left. He didn’t want to.” 

Mike glanced at Chester, holding his stomach, and at the elevator numbers as they ascended slowly. “I thought Jason was on our side,” he commented bitterly. “I guess I was wrong.”

The elevator dinged, and the door slowly opened. Chester pulled away from Mike to walk a little more on his own as they stepped into the sixth floor hallway. “It’s not his fault, Mike. Jason _is_ on our side. He’s just trying to survive, just like the rest of us.” His eyes fell to the floor, and the way their shoes were hitting the polished cement tiles. “I know you haven’t been around long enough to understand, but Jason. . .he takes a lot from Mark. More than any of us do. He tries to fight, but, he can only do so much.” Chester’s voice dropped off as they got to the door, and he waited while Mike fumbled with the keys. 

There wasn’t anything else to say. The anger Mike had been pushing down ever since Chester hit the floor in the piano room was threatening to bubble over, and he knew it wasn’t the time to argue now. He pushed open the door and held it as Chester walked inside, then turned to make sure it was locked. _Paranoid. It’s true. I’m going to feel like there’s always someone watching us now._

Coming home didn’t feel like the safe place it normally did, and Mike looked around the bottom floor of the loft he’d grown to love. _We have to leave. We have to. I don’t know what it will take to get him to agree with me, but something has to change. We can’t stay like this._ He watched Chester head directly for the stairs and went to follow, making sure he got to the top without issue.

“I just need to lay down,” Chester mumbled as he toed off his shoes. He debated peeling off his clothes and getting under the blankets, but he didn’t really want to fall asleep. He just wanted to rest. He wanted his world to go quiet for a little bit so he could process everything out and piece it together enough to move forward. He would need to compartmentalize what had happened, put it all in its proper place in his mind, and then he would be okay. 

He twisted his head from side to side, cracking and stretching his neck before he laid down, curling onto his side. He looked up at Mike. “I’m okay, Sexy Boy. Promise. Just give me a little bit.” 

For a second, Mike debated laying down next to his boyfriend, pulling him close to his chest, and shutting out the world. The rumble in his stomach reminded him that he hadn’t gotten a snack before all hell broke loose at YRS, and he looked at Chester and then over at the stairs. “If you think you’re okay, I’m gonna go down and get us something to eat. Maybe some soup? You look like you need some soup or something.” 

Chester reached his hand out, dragging it down the leg of Mike’s jeans as he stared up into his dark eyes. “Soup would be great.” He smiled as he tugged on Mike’s pants. “It’s going to be alright,” he felt compelled to say. “All of it. Eventually.” 

Mike wanted to agree, but he felt so far from being alright that he just couldn’t say anything, even though doing so would have lifted some of the sadness from Chester’s eyes. “I’ll be right back,” was all that came out before he turned away and headed down the stairs. He just couldn’t imagine how things would be okay, not now. Not with everyone knowing his secrets, seeing him as vulnerable as he’d been in that video. Three layers of flannel shirts wouldn’t be enough to hide him away from everyone, even if he could figure out a way to put three shirts on at once. 

He stood in front of the kitchen sink, his hands braced on the edge of the counter, his head bowed and his eyes screwed shut as he tried not to break down. _I don’t want him to hear me. He’s already upset enough, thinks it’s his fault. It’s both of our fault. We were careless. That’s not like me at all. I think things through. I’m cautious. Methodical. I don’t know what’s gotten into me lately._

He sucked in a slow breath through his nose and let it out through his mouth even slower, trying to keep his exhalation silent. Two more breaths and he opened his eyes, steadying himself before he stepped over to the stove. _Soup. I can’t make soup like Ches, but there’s some canned soup I convinced him to get last time we went shopping. When I finally got him to understand he’s not always here when I have to eat._ Mike pulled out two cans of chicken noodle and set them on the counter so he could grab one of Chester’s saucepans. He could hear Chester’s voice in his head - _use a wooden spoon, Mike, don’t scratch my pot_ \- as he poured both cans into the pot and turned on the burner. 

He looked in the cabinet for crackers, but there weren’t any, and Mike frowned in annoyance. _How can we eat soup without crackers? What else goes with soup? I’ll be hungry in five minutes if all we eat is soup. I could make a sandwich. Maybe we have lunchmeat._ He opened up the fridge and looked around, frustrated to only find bread and cheese. _I guess I could try grilled cheese again. Last time I did that, I burned the bread and the loft smelled for the rest of the day._

Mike looked toward the ceiling wistfully. _I’m not going to call him down here. I said I’d get us something to eat, and I can do it myself. I’ll just go slower. Ches always says I’m too impatient. Maybe I just need to let it sit on the heat longer. I must have had the burner too high last time._

He busied himself with buttering each side of the bread as the skillet warmed, then slowly toasted one side of two slices of bread. _Look at me. Haven’t burnt it yet. Slow. I can be patient._ The soup was starting to bubble around the edges of the saucepan, and Mike reached to turn the heat down. _Soup and sandwiches. That’s all I can make, and Ches is usually in here making the elaborate dinners… I wish he’d consider doing something with food. He’s so good at it. If I could get him to understand that, maybe I can convince him that we can leave. I know he’s worried about his mom, but we can send her money from Colorado. Maybe if I try with my parents, maybe Dad would have some advice on how to settle her debts. If they see that I’m in a committed relationship, that I’m happy…_

Mike carefully placed a slice of cheese on the warm side of the bread, then placed another slice of bread on top. _Happy. I’m happy when we’re home. I could never tell them about YRS. But if we left, if we both got jobs, if they see that we can be successful… maybe things would be okay with them. I’m willing to try, if that will get Ches out of YRS. I’d do anything to get him out. Especially now, after what Mark said. One mistake, and he’ll fire me. It would be just like Dave said. Nowhere to live, and Mark would take Ches away from me. He’d have him at work non-stop, just to keep us apart. I can’t let that happen. I can’t give him any reason to get rid of me._

The sandwich looked like it was done, and Mike carefully lifted one corner to see if the cheese was melted. _Wow. Look at that. Ches was right, I am too impatient with things. I didn’t burn it this time. I’ll give him this one. It actually looks pretty good._ With a vague smile, Mike pulled down a bowl and spooned in some of the soup, then put the bowl on the plate alongside the sandwich. _Oh well, everything is the same color. I’m not good at this like Ches. But maybe it will be good enough._

The second sandwich turned out better than the first, and Mike decided that would be Chester’s. He filled two glasses with water, then took one glass and one plate and started up the stairs. When he stepped into the loft, Chester’s back was to him. He was curled around Mike’s pillow, and for a second, Mike was afraid his boyfriend had fallen asleep. “Ches? Babe? You awake? I made you a grilled cheese.” 

Chester opened his eyes, his focus hitting the half wall on Mike’s side of the room. He hadn’t fallen asleep, but he’d been just drifting into that lazy place where his conscious had more or less turned off. He yawned as he rolled over, looking up. “Grilled cheese? And soup?” He sat up, his stomach growling. “I love you, have I told you that lately?” he asked, a soft smile lifting his features as he scratched the side of his head. 

“You can tell me again after you decide if it’s edible,” Mike answered, setting the glass down on the nightstand and handing the plate to Chester. “I’ll be right back, gonna go get mine.” He hurried back down the stairs and scooped up his plate and glass of water, and was back at Chester’s side. “I know it’s not homemade, but maybe it will do in a pinch.” 

Chester balanced his bowl of soup on his knee as Mike sat down on the bed wtih him, scooting back to mimic his position against the pillows and headboard. “It smells good,” Chester offered as he took a deep inhale of the canned soup. He knew it would be hot and soothing, and those were two very good things at the moment. He dipped his spoon in and pulled out some broth, blowing across it before swallowing it down. “I already feel better. Thank you.” 

“It’s kinda weird to cook for you,” Mike said, his grilled cheese sandwich in his hand. “You’ve got me totally spoiled on all the good stuff you can make. The last time I made grilled cheese sandwiches I burned the bread.” He looked over at Chester and rolled his eyes. “I ate it anyway.” 

Chester let out a soft chuckle. “I can believe it. And grilled cheese is more of an art than people like to admit to. It takes practice and patience.” He looked over at the plate on the nightstand, examining the sandwich Mike had put there. “It looks good, and smells good. Hope you put extra cheese on it.” 

Mike shrugged. “Just tell me if you like it. If it’s not up to your standards, I’ll eat it for you. It’s the best looking sandwich I’ve ever made.” His grilled cheese was almost gone already and he was wishing he’d made another. 

“My standards,” Chester repeated. “You make me sound like a food snob.” He looked over at his boyfriend before he grabbed for his sandwich. “I’m sure it’s fine.” 

“Mine was good,” Mike grinned at him, the sandwich gone. He was happy to see Chester eating something, even if it was just canned soup and his sad little grilled cheese with one slice of cheese on it. “And yeah, you are kinda a food snob. But I love that about you.” He poked his spoon into his soup and looked at the flat noodles. “I love everything you make. I’ve told you before. You’re the best chef I know.”

Chester swallowed a bite of grilled cheese. “It’s good,” he said, waving his sandwich toward Mike. “And I don’t mean to be that way. It’s just, cooking is something I like. I care about it. I can control it,” he said before he shut his mouth and looked down at his lap. “And thanks,” he mumbled. “I love cooking for you. It’s a lot more fun cooking for two than for just me.” 

_Control. Cooking. Clothes. Cleaning. That’s what it’s all about. Things he can control because everything else is so out of his control._ Mike moved his noodles around as he stared down into his bowl. He didn’t want to think about work but somehow thoughts kept crowding back into his mind. They ate in silence for a while, and Mike finished his soup before Chester even though it didn’t particularly taste good to him. “How are you feeling now?” he asked finally, realizing Chester had been the last person to speak. 

Chester nodded. “I’m good. Better,” he stated as he twisted around and set his half empty bowl of soup on the nightstand. He took his glass of water and finished it off before he stood up. “I’ve got to pee,” he said as he picked up his dishes. “Meet you downstairs?” 

“Sure.” Mike slid off his side of the bed and grabbed his empty plate with the bowl on it. “I’m glad you’re feeling better. We should go walk on the beach, or something. Something mind clearing. If you’re up for it,” he amended, not sure if his boyfriend was feeling enough better to put forth that much effort. 

“Maybe,” Chester said over his shoulder as he headed downstairs. He really didn’t want to go back out. He needed to pee, and then he wanted to sit on the couch and be lazy. He knew it wasn’t much of a plan, but it was a free day. An unexpected day off, and so there was nothing he _should_ be doing instead. He left his dishes on the bar before he shot into the bathroom, his bladder screaming at him. It only took seconds before he was washing his hands and heading back out to the kitchen. _I wonder if Jason is expecting us to come into work tomorrow? I don’t want to go. I bet I could tell him I’m still sick. He wouldn’t push it. . .Mark might though. I can fake a cough and he’s not here, not like he’s going to be standing over me checking my temperature._ The silly notion popped a smile across Chester’s face. 

Mike looked up from rinsing out his bowl to see Chester hovering, ready to clean up the kitchen. “You go sit down, I’ve got this,” he said, shooing Chester away with one hand. “I know you love to clean the kitchen, but just let me, this time. You weren’t feeling well, maybe you should take it easy the rest of the day. I take back what I said about the beach. Now, go,” he said again as Chester went to open his mouth in protest. 

Mike’s voice was serious, and Chester didn’t have the energy or the will to fight. He slumped his shoulders instead and headed for the couch. _Fine. It’s where I wanted to be anyway._ He sat down, and leaned back, shutting his eyes for a minute. He wanted to think happy thoughts - a place far away where YRS didn’t exist, a dream vacation with Mike, a time and place where he wasn’t in debt and his mom was living in a nice slick new apartment. But instead Noah’s face popped into his head, and Chester glared at the coffee table. _I’m not going to watch it. I can’t. It will just piss me off if I watch it. Break my heart. It’s already broken Mike’s heart. Everything we said that day. . .and did. He would pick that one time to be ultra sexy and jerk himself off in front of me. I would kind of like to see that again. . ._

The thought of having that particular event solidified and saved on film forever was almost a happy one as Chester pulled his phone from his pocket. He glanced over the back of the couch, eyeing his boyfriend as he rinsed dishes and filled the dishwasher, before he turned back to his phone. _Just going to pull it up real quick. . .maybe skip to the end._ He had the YRS website in his _most viewed_ and his eyes went wide when he saw the advertisement for their piano room love making session was all over the front page. “Fuck,” he whispered as he scrolled through the still frames, cringing slightly at the intimate moments - Mike at the piano while he stood behind him, his hand on Mike’s neck. The two of them facing each other, shirtless, while they spoke. There was another still of them by the windows, Mike on his back, and Chester between his knees going down on him. 

It was sobering, and the memory of their thunderstorm romance rushed over Chester as something boiled in his stomach. It was private. For the first time since he’d been at YRS, Chester felt like Mark had taken something that didn’t belong to him. He pursed his lips together as he clicked on the video, but instead of forwarding to the end, he scrolled down to read the description. _It’s just like Noah said. . .all of it._ He could feel his hand gripping his phone a little harder as he got past the description of how the above video was a _real life glimpse into Mike and Chester’s romantic life_ to see the comments and ratings left by the fans. Chester hesitated, knowing he didn’t really want to see what was being said. Not about this video. Not about their private lives. But a second later and he’d lost the battle of wills with himself. 

_I can’t believe Mike has only fucked Chester. No way. He’s in porn! But the video is great overall._ Chester snarled as he read the review and then the next. _I love how real this is! I always figured they were together in real life, and this proves it! I want more like this! And how cute is Chester for being scared of thunder? Thank goodness his Sexy Boy was there to protect him!_

Chester was ready to rage as he read the next one. _Mike is so hot, and even more so if he can really play the piano like that. Can’t believe he’s only been with Chester. But that shows. His face gives everything away, especially when he said Chester’s name while he was cumming. That was fucking hot. I want more of that. YRS needs more of Mike jerking himself off and Chester watching. And then more of Chester jerking himself off for Mike to watch. The raw/real factor of this video is off the charts._

Chester looked away from his phone, seething. _I can’t believe people. If they only fucking knew how that really went down._ He took a long breath, ready to try again and close the website, but he couldn’t. He looked at the next one, his mouth dropping open. _It’s about time we see Chester on top. I’ve missed seeing him fuck since he’s been with Mike. I like that too, but he’s got a sweet ass I like to watch as he pounds into someone. I hope they do more of this._

Chester dropped his phone, not caring that it hit the floor. 

Mike looked up sharply from the kitchen, where he’d just finished wiping down the countertop, trying to keep everything as clean as Chester liked it. “Babe? You okay?” 

Chester had his head in his hands, staring down at his phone, the website still lit up. He could still see the words - the blunt remarks and careless ways people talked about how he and Mike made love. He watched it, till his phone went dim. “I hate the fucking world,” he said before he scooped his phone from the floor and stood up. He turned to face the kitchen. “People. . .people just say whatever the hell they want.”

Mike set the dish towel to the side warily and came around the side of the bar, closer to Chester. “What happened now? Did one of the guys text you?” He pointed to Chester’s phone. “You didn’t break it, did you? It hit the floor pretty hard.”

Chester looked at his phone, even though he knew it wasn’t broken. He held it up, the screen facing out so Mike could see it. “Not the guys. The fans. I, I looked at the comments about our video,” he admitted, tucking his breath in the moment he said it. “Sorry,” he apologized. “I just, what Noah said stuck in my mind and I wanted to see, and I read, like, four comments before I wanted to throw my phone out the window.” 

“Why would you do that?” Mike exclaimed, his voice higher pitched than normal. “ _Fuck_ them, Chester, I don’t want to know what they think!” There was no self-control anymore as Mike stared him down. “What good does it do to look at that, huh? It shouldn’t even be there. You just couldn’t help yourself, could you?” 

The anger on Chester’s face lifted for a second as he took a step back. “What? What does that mean?” 

“You know how I feel about this - all of it, not just this latest video. But you couldn’t help but look to see what people were saying about us. It’s like you need the approval of a job well done or something, I don’t know! This wasn’t about work, Chester, this was about _us_ and Mark _stole it_ from us! Why even look? To see if your fans are commenting about the weather? Or who’s on top, or maybe about how you’re the only person I’ve ever had sex with? Have you even thought about all the things we said to each other that day?” Mike knew he was yelling but he couldn’t stop. The anger and the fear over everything that had happened at YRS that morning was consuming him. 

Chester felt his jaw shaking. The last thing he’d expected was to be attacked by Mike. He was ready for them to have righteous anger together - toward the fans - but that’s not what was happening. “Mike, I’m not like that,” he stated, stabbing his finger into his chest. “Don’t you think I’m mad, too? I wasn’t looking to see what people were saying or for approval, I was just going to -” but stopped. He broke his eye contact with his boyfriend, choosing to stare out the windows at the late afternoon sky instead. “It’s on the front page,” he whispered. “I just glanced at it, and. . .I know what we said to each other, Mike.” He shut his eyes. “I’m sorry. But don’t yell at me,” he added as he twisted around to make sure Mike had heard him. 

The hurt look in Chester’s eyes pulled Mike back for a moment. Chester was right. He knew his boyfriend was mad, too, and had every right to be. He was lashing out, being nasty to Chester when they had both been violated. Mike closed his eyes for a second, trying to get control of himself. “I’m sorry. You’re right. I shouldn’t yell. I just… I don’t know, Ches, it’s a mess. I don’t want any of that stuff out there, and there’s nothing I can do about it. Nothing.” He hit his fist against his thigh and said, “so? What are they saying? You looked it up, so now you have to tell me. How bad is it?” 

Chester glared down at his phone. “You don’t want to know. I don’t want to know. I’m not going to look at it again,” he decided. “I didn’t really mean to the first time.” He shoved his phone into his pocket. “Fucking thunderstorm. We never should have done that,” he grumbled as he moved past Mike to get to the kitchen. He headed right for the refrigerator. He opened the door, letting the cool air brush over him as he stared at his drink options. 

Mike opened his eyes to follow Chester. “Seriously? Are you going to make me look it up myself? And you’re right, this all could have been avoided if we’d just thought it through a little better, but it’s not our fault. We were _alone_. We shouldn’t have to worry about what we’re doing when we’re alone.” He watched Chester at the refrigerator and couldn’t help but toss in, “I don’t want you drinking right now, if that’s what you’re thinking.” 

Chester silently fumed with his head in the refrigerator before he grabbed a vanilla Coke from the shelf and turned around. “Not drinking,” he said in his best mocking tone. “And don’t look up the comments, Mike, I’ll summarize for you what I read.” He stepped over to the counter, setting the can of Coke down before he popped the tab. “Basically, everyone loves that it was _real_ , they adore the fact that you’ve only been with me - even though they don’t really fucking believe that,” he said, his voice high and snippy as he waved his hand through the air. “They think I’m cute for being scared of thunder, and they think you’re a great piano player.” He stopped, trying to remember if he left anything out. _And they’ve missed watching me fuck. No need to say that._ “That’s about it,” he said, taking his drink and heading back across the loft to get to the couch. “At least from the four comments I read.” 

“Don’t talk to me in that tone, Ches,” Mike said, his shoulders coming forward as he curled in on himself. “I didn’t do anything wrong. I know I shouldn’t have yelled at you, and I’m sorry. But… I don’t know how much more of this I can take. Mark’s threats, and him doing this, it’s like… I don’t know anymore. The thought of all that being out there…” He stood for a minute, trying to make sense of how he was feeling. There was just too much right now. They were both hurting, and neither of them were being particularly kind to the other. “I think, I think I need some space. I don’t want to fight. But I can’t do this right now. I’ve been trying to get you to see how fucked up YRS is, and you won’t listen. Even after this, you’re shutting me out, I can see it.”

He walked over to the coffee table and picked up his phone and his keys where he’d left them earlier. Chester didn’t even look at him, and Mike sighed. “I’m telling you, we could go to Colorado. Just leave all this behind. One of these days, either you’re going to finally listen to me, or something so bad is going to happen that we’re not going to be able to recover from it.” Mike felt the sting of tears behind his eyes and he stepped toward the door. Part of him hoped Chester would follow or say something, but the other part of him just needed some time to think. There had to be a way to get Chester to understand. This latest stunt Mark had pulled was probably just the next in a pattern of escalating problems.

When Chester didn’t make a move, Mike slipped out the front door, not knowing where he was really headed. 

****  
TBC


	36. Fried Cheese and a Soapy Cock

Chester sat at a small, two person table toward the back of the bar. The lights were low, and music played overhead - the top forty hits from five years ago. He recognized almost every song that came on, and hummed along as he sipped his rum and Coke and people watched over the rest of the bar. This was one of his favorite places to go, and before Mike had come into his life, he frequented it often. There were pool tables off to the left, and a small dance floor - both of which he’d taken part in at one time or another, but tonight he just wanted to sit and not be noticed. 

After Mike had stormed out of their apartment, Chester had decided he wanted a drink, and since Mike had gotten on him before about drinking alone, he figured his favorite bar would be a good alternative. Chester’s phone dinged, and he sat his rum and Coke down to pick it up from the table. He quickly read over the text message from Ryan, who was on his way to meet him. 

Chester typed back before he left his phone on the table and leaned back in his chair. He shoved his hands into the front pockets of his black hoodie, blankly staring down at the table. There were scratches in the wood, and the initials S.B., but in general it was clean. The whole bar was clean, which was one of Chester’s favorite things about it. 

He scratched his fingers up under the black and white striped knit beanie he’d shoved onto his head before he’d left the apartment. His flattened hair was sticking out a little in the back, and a little in the front, the cherry red tips looking like snake tongues. He pushed his bottom lip out, playing with his piercing for a second before his eyes darted across the room. A group of girls had just come in, all three of them laughing loudly, and making comments about having a _girls night out_. Chester chuckled to himself a little as he watched the shortest of the group struggle to get sat down on one of the tall bar stools. He almost felt compelled to walk over and offer to help, since it was clear her friends weren’t going to, just as he saw Ryan coming in the door. All thoughts of the short girl’s dilemma vanished, as he raised his hand and waved. 

Ryan waved back before he turned to the bartender, pointing at the bottles lining the back wall. Chester smiled as he watched him, as Ryan leaned on the bar and made small talk. His black hair was slicked back, and his tight fitting t-shirt clung to his flat stomach and strong arms. His black leather jacket was tossed over one arm, and his jeans hugged his hips. But it was Ryan’s striking blue eyes that really got him attention, and Chester was no exception. If he had to pick out Ryan’s most attractive feature, it would be his eyes. _I know Jason likes them, too. And the fans. Baby Blue, that’s what they call him in all the reviews. Where do people come up with these names? Guess I’m no better. . .Sexy Boy. I’m just as corny as our fans._

“Hey, Chazzy,” Ryan said with a grin as he sat down across from him, folding his coat over his lap as he sat his strawberry margarita on the table. “Are you cold?” 

Chester looked down at his oversized hoodie before he shrugged his shoulders. “Trying to stay lowkey tonight,” he admitted, his hand absently brushing up over his beanie. “So tell me again how you’re even here? Did Mark let you leave?” he asked, sitting forward and cupping his rum and Coke with both hands.

“Kind of,” Ryan answered before he took a sip of his drink. “Fuck, that’s strong,” he whispered before he cleared his throat. “After you left _sick_ , which glad to see you look just fine, Amir suddenly came down with something too,” he said with an eye roll. “Chaz, you really missed a drama show.” 

Chester let out a snort. “I bet! I can’t believe Mark bought his fake ass sickness.” 

Ryan shook his head before he took another sip. “It wasn’t really Mark. Jay wasn’t in the mood. He just kinda flipped out, told Amir to go home if he was sick, and then he told me I could go too.” He paused, his bright eyes dimming under the low lighting overhead. “He’s upset, but I don’t know why. He won’t tell me anything. Not why he’s upset or even what happened with you guys,” he said, flicking his fingers toward Chester before his eyebrows squeezed together in thought. “Which, I mean, where’s Mike? Oh, he’s not old enough,” Ryan said, answering his own question. “We need to get him a fake I.D. Jason can get it, if he wants one.” 

Chester dropped his eyes to the table. “He wouldn’t,” he mumbled. “And. . .I don’t exactly know where he’s at,” he admitted, as he brought his rum and Coke up to his lips. He savored the smell of the dark, spiced alcohol before he took a long gulp, letting the instant tingle run through his limbs before he said, “we had a fight, and he walked out.” 

“Again?” Ryan asked, before he pursed his lips together and rethought what he was about to say. He hated seeing Chester look miserable, and that was exactly what was happening. “I mean, why? Does this have to do with work? With why Jay is upset?” He sat forward, reaching a hand across the table to barely brush his fingers over Chester’s hand. “Tell me what’s going on, Chaz. Come on, Jay’s not telling me anything and he’s upset and you’re looking like someone just kicked your puppy and you and Mike are fighting. What the hell happened?”

Chester left his hand where it was as Ryan’s fingers curled under his. _Where do I start? I can’t believe Jason hasn’t told him anything. . .they’re usually open about this stuff. Will Mike be mad if I tell him? Fuck me, I guess it doesn't matter. The damn tape is on the site, anyone and everyone can see it._

“Chaz?” Ryan called, and he waited till his friend looked up to meet his eyes. “Did Mark do something again? Are you, are you okay?”

Chester felt Ryan’s fingers squeeze his before he pulled his hand away. “No, nothing like that. I’m fine,” Chester assured him before he took a drink, eyeing the slim amount of rum and Coke he had left. “Remember last weekend, when you and Amir took Brad to the hospital and Jason and the others were gone?” 

Ryan nodded. 

“Well, Adam went home sick, and me and Mike were at the house alone.” He stopped for a minute, rubbing his thumb along the side of his glass, wishing it wasn’t so empty looking. “We had sex in the piano room.” 

Ryan’s mouth dropped open. “You actually got Mike to have sex in his cherished piano room?” His eyes were lit up as he went to say more, as he went to congratulate his friend for such an accomplishment. Mike Shinoda was a porn star, but he was also a prude. The idea that he’d have sex in a large open space like the piano room was almost mind blowing.

“It was more than sex,” Chester said, before Ryan could offer him a proverbial high five. He could feel his chest tightening as he tried to find the right words - the right order of things to admit to. There had been so many personal things that had been said - that had been done - and it had all been caught on camera. 

“You okay?” Ryan asked softly as he watched Chester wipe his eye with the back of his sleeve. “Here, I’ll get you another drink,” he offered quickly as he stood up. He took Chester’s glass, and after a quick sniff, he knew it was a rum and Coke. He headed to the bar and quickly ordered another before he sat back down, sliding the full glass across the table. “Take your time, Chaz. You know I won’t judge you.” 

Chester nodded as he sipped his drink. “I know.” He leaned forward, one elbow on the table as he rubbed the side of his head. “The week before, I wasn’t doing well,” he admitted with a swallow. “Well, you know. . .but it was more than I told you. I was just, not wanting to be touched.” 

“Chaz, there’s nothing wrong with that, with what happened that’s understandable,” Ryan was quick to chime in and he was relieved to see Chester nod in agreement. 

“But I was pushing Mike away and I shouldn’t have been. Not the way I was,” he stated, his eyes falling to Ryan’s half full margarita glass. The bright, red liquid looked good, and Chester licked his lips as he decided he’d get one of those next. “But then we ended up alone at YRS and he was. . .sad. And I realized how much I was hurting him. I just wanted him to feel good. _I_ wanted to feel good. So I started it. He was playing the piano and I was kissing on him, and we talked about everything that happened and we ended up on the floor over by the windows, watching the rain and making out. More than making out.” 

“But the floor in the piano room is fucking hard,” Ryan whined, his hand instinctually going to his back.

“We had blankets,” Chester said before he covered his mouth for a minute. 

“What? Chaz, tell me,” Ryan begged. 

“We used the cursed blankets and pillows, you know, the ones from the kitchen that Brad saves,” he said with a cringe. “And that’s my fault too, because I suggested it,” he insisted, pointing to his chest, his fingers grabbing onto the pull strings of his hoodie. “Mike didn’t even know they were there till I showed him, and I should have known better.” 

Ryan sat back, a look of relief running over his face. “Is that what’s got everyone all upset? Brad’s cursed blankets? Damn, Chaz, and I thought it was something major. Not that his cursed blankets aren’t a huge deal,” he was sure to say as he stuck out his hand and sat forward. “But I thought you were going to say something way worse than that. Wait. . .did you guys get cursed?” he asked, his eyebrow lifting just slightly. He could already feel his margarita, and the idea of Mike and Chester having sex on the infamous cursed blankets sent a string of funny images through his mind - Mike ending up with itchy spots or Chester suddenly going color blind. 

“Kind of,” Chester said, his shoulders slumping, and the moment they did, all funny thoughts disappeared from Ryan’s mind. 

“What happened?” 

Chester shook his head. “They filmed us, Ry,” he admitted in a small voice before he looked up. “There’s cameras in the piano room - secret cameras - and they filmed it. They watched it, and then, and then they put it on the site!” Chester gasped at the volume of his own voice and he clamped his mouth shut and lowered his head. 

“What?” Ryan asked, his jaw dropped. “Fucking what? Wait, Jason let this happen?” 

Chester nodded, his hand on his forehead. 

Ryan’s hand went to his chest, his head in slow motion as he shook it back and forth. “Not _my_ Jason. He, he wouldn’t do that. That wasn’t a shoot, that was just, you know,” he said, his words coming out in metered gasps. “No. No, Chaz, that can’t be right.” 

Chester looked up as he wiped the corner of his eye. “It’s true. Jason did it. Or, he says Mark made him, which, I know is also true. And now it’s out there and it’s getting reviews and ratings and people are talking about it, and it wasn’t for YRS,” he said as he grabbed his drink and downed two large gulps. He waited a second as his head spun slightly before he set his drink back down. “We said a lot of things. . .things people know now. Personal shit, Ry. Private stuff between me and Mike. And on top of all of that,” he said, his tone changing to indignation, “it was fucking storming. Thunder and lightning and I’m flinching all over the place over the thunder and that’s all in the comments now, how I’m ‘so cute for being scared of thunder,’” he mocked in a high pitched voice before he gnashed his teeth. “I hate it. I don’t need people knowing that kind of stuff.” 

Ryan swallowed down the last of his margarita. “That’s fucked up,” he stated, his fingers digging into the side of the glass. “I bet Mike is losing his mind.” 

“More than losing his mind,” Chester agreed. “Which is the worst part. You know how private he is, and, it wasn’t like when we’re Charlie Bang and Kenji Kobayashi. We did things different. We were different because we thought we were alone,” Chester said with a huff. “And Jason or Mark or one of them even listed it that way. As Chester and Mike.” 

Ryan looked up from his empty glass. “What?” he asked, shock pouring off his face. “What do you mean they listed it as Chester and Mike?” 

“I mean just fucking that,” Chester hissed as he leaned forward, both his elbows on the table, his hands on either side of his head. “They listed it as us. . .as the real Charlie and Kenji. How we’re really together and this is a look into our real lives,” he spit, hating every single word as he closed his eyes. “Mike said out loud that I’m the only one he’s been with. . .it just came up in our conversation when we were talking, and now the whole fucking world knows that about him, and he’s so mad.” Chester’s eyes drifted up to the ceiling. “He’s embarrassed or ashamed, I don’t even know.” 

“Well he shouldn’t be,” Ryan said, and he waited till Chester lowered his gaze so their eyes could meet. “Way back when you first told me that Mike was a virgin when you guys first met, I thought it was a little weird. I mean, he’s nineteen. But you know, now I think it’s fucking amazing that he saved himself until he knew he was in love. Can you even imagine what that would be like?” Ryan pulled his lips in as he looked down at his drink. “You and me, Chaz, we didn’t get that. We got the opposite of that. It’s nothing he should be ashamed of.”

Chester nodded as he whispered, “I know.” He waited a minute, his finger drawing a small circle on the table where his cold drink had left a ring. “I was on top that day,” he admitted quietly. “I’ve never been on top for anything with Mike at YRS. He hasn’t wanted to. . .he says it exposes him too much to be on the bottom in front of the camera. His words, his facial expressions and reactions, all that stuff just shows twice as much when he’s on the bottom, or at least that’s how he feels.” He stopped as he peeked up to see Ryan staring at him. “It had been awhile since I’d been on top,” he gingerly admitted. “At home, he’s taken that position over. He didn’t, he didn’t orgasm in time, which was my fault. I got mine too fast, and then, fuck,” he hissed as he shut his eyes. “He jerked himself off after. Which was sexy at the time, I mean, I’ve never watched him do that. It was amazing and he called my name.” Chester let himself out of his own grip as he sat back a little. “And now it’s all on the YRS website for everyone to see. For everyone to pick apart. Mike’s so mad. He wants us to run away.” 

“Wow, wait,” Ryan said, his voice hitting a high note. “Run away? Run away like how?” 

Chester looked up from the table. “He wants us to move to Colorado.”

Ryan felt his stomach turn. The idea of Chester leaving - not just YRS but the Los Angeles area - was enough to make him sick. His mind turned over everything Chester had just told him, about the invasion of his and Mike’s privacy and how YRS was marketing it to invade that privacy even more, but running away to Colorado? “I need another drink,” he said, as he stood up. “You want another?” he asked, pointing at Chester’s empty glass with an unsteady finger. 

“Get me one of what you had,” Chester asked. He watched Ryan cross the bar, dodging around people and waving his hand to get the barkeep’s attention before he stared back down at the table. _How could they do this to us? It’s not fair. I know, I know all the stuff Mark said is true. We were on the clock and it’s his house, but he knows how much Mike would hate it. Maybe he’s just trying to hurt Mike. Trying to hurt us both. Punishment. Or maybe it was those damned cursed blankets._ He wiped his eyes with his sleeve before he picked his phone up from the table. It had been silent ever since Ryan had arrived, but Chester pulled up his text logs under Mike’s name anyway. 

No new messages. 

_He’s mad at me. And he should be. I’m ruining his life._ He set his phone down, as Ryan returned, handing him a strawberry margarita. Chester took a quick sip, loving the sweet fruity taste before he sat it down. 

“Okay, tell me about Colorado,” Ryan said before gulping down a fresh taste of his second drink. 

“Mike’s parents are there,” Chester said, his head leaning on his hand. “His dad is a lawyer. He thinks if we go there, we’ll be safe. You know, like, Mark won’t come after us. After _me_ ,” he corrected. “But I told him that won’t work. I told him about when Jason tried to leave. Ry, he’d come after me.” He dropped his arm to the table with a thump, like it weighed a ton. “Or he’d do something to my mom. He knows where she lives. . .he knows everything. I’m so stupid.” Chester clenched his teeth as he looked away from Ryan and out over the bar - out at the people who were all smiling and having a good time as they flirted, danced, and enjoyed their drinks. “I’ve told him so much about myself over the last three years,” Chester grumbled. “He’d ask, and I’d just tell him everything. It never fucking occured to me that he’d ever use any of it against me.” He rolled his eyes as he sat back. “I thought he asked because he cared, not so he could hold shit over my head.” 

“Has he actually threatened your mom?” Ryan asked, cautiously. He knew it was a touchy subject - the touchiest of all subjects for Chester. 

“Not directly,” Chester answered, looking up to see Ryan’s bold blue eyes watching him closely. “But you know how he is. He says just enough to make sure I know that he could do something.” 

“Yeah, I know how _that_ goes,” Ryan hissed indignantly. “Fuck, Chaz. Dude, I’m just sorry.” He let out a sigh. “And how could Jason be involved in any of this?” He shook his head, like trying to believe the idea was impossible. “He’s always told me how much he respects you and Mike because you’re _really_ together, and a solid couple, even doing what we do. And, we’re all friends,” he added, throwing his hands in the air in frustration. “No wonder he didn’t want to tell me. He. . .he. . .it’s all because of Mark,” he growled. “Who knows what he did to Jay to make him do that to you guys.” He sat forward, his hands going over his eyes for a minute. “I wish our lives were different, Chazzy.” 

Chester nodded. “Me too.” Despite his own troubles at the moment, his heart ached more for his friend as he watched Ryan hide himself away. Chester sucked his piercing into his mouth for a second before he said, “Fuck it. I don’t want to talk about this anymore.” He sat forward, grabbed his margarita, and tipped it back, savoring the sweet taste. “Let’s change the subject. What’s done is done, right? I can’t change it,” he said, pointing to his chest, “and Mike can’t change it, and Jason didn’t have a choice, so fuck it. Tell me all about Amir instead,” he decided, an intoxicated smile cracking his lips as he giggled. “I want to hear all about the drama I missed.” 

Ryan had since dropped his hands from his face, and was smiling back. “He could have won an Oscar,” he cackled, waving a hand through the air. “Chazzy, it was hysterical! He had his hand on his forehead and talking about how he might faint!” 

“I could see that!” Chester bellowed back, his voice much louder than he realized as he snagged another drink of his margarita. “Out of everyone at work, I think he _is_ the biggest drama queen!” 

“No doubt! And then he was like, spots! I see spots before my eyes! And Brad!” Ryan busted out into laughter before he could finish his sentence. “Brad was freaking out, like, claiming that Amir had caught some plague and we would all suffer if he stayed in the house and, oh, oh,” he said excitedly, flapping his hand in the air, “you’ll love this, he said that seeing spots is a bad omen. That it means that the universe is shifting - like, in a bad way - and that something really bad is coming.” He stopped, his exuberance fading. “I hope he’s not right. Damn. Is it even possible for things to get worse at YRS?” 

The smile on Chester’s face sank, the giddy atmosphere that had just been present gone in an instant. “God, I hope not. But, Amir’s spots weren’t real, right? I mean, right? Fake spots won’t bring a bad omen,” he decided just as a tall blonde woman walked by their table with a basket of freshly made fried mozzarella sticks. Chester turned to watch as she sat down with a dark haired guy, putting the mozzarella sticks between them. 

“You know her or something?” Ryan asked as he watched Chester’s attention leave him. 

“No,” Chester said, turning back around. “But Mike loves mozzarella sticks. I should take him some.” 

“Have you heard from him yet?” Ryan asked as he gestured toward Chester’s phone, which was still sitting on the table. Silent. 

“No. . .but I’ll take him some anyway. Don’t let me forget,” Chester requested, his words coming out in a heavy slur as he leaned forward and smiled. He reached his hand out, and Ryan took it, the two of them exchanging goofy looks before Chester’s dropped to a sullen stare. “He was mad at me. Maybe if I bring him some of his favorite food, we can talk it out. And I’m drunk,” he admitted as he felt Ryan squeeze his hand. “Mike’s going to be mad at me for that, too. I’ll take him two batches of cheese sticks,” he decided with a snort, his intoxicated grin returning. “He can’t be mad at me if I bring him cheese.” 

 

****

It was almost dark, and Mike was still sitting at the table at the coffee shop across from Joe’s Karate studio. Joe had left more than an hour ago, but Mike still hadn’t been able to move. He traced the lines in the ceramic mosaic top with his finger over and over, trying to come to a conclusion about what to do next.

_Joe’s right. None of this is Chester’s fault. Or my fault. But maybe it just seems that way, since I didn’t really tell him everything. Just enough, just an outline. But I still shouldn’t have left. I just left him there, and we shouldn’t be fighting right now. We’re in this together. I made this choice. I went to YRS to be with him. Now I’ve got to face the consequences of that decision._

He sat back and crossed his ankles out in front of him. His phone was still where he’d left it after he’d finished glancing over the comments on the YRS site. He’d waited until Joe left, and then he couldn’t stand it anymore. There had never been any curiosity before now, before this latest video, but Mike had never considered what was on film to be him. Kenji was Charlie’s lover, yes - but Kenji wasn’t Mike. 

The comments from the piano room weren’t about Kenji, though. They were about Mike. And Mike had _needed_ to see them. He needed to know if he’d been exposed the way he’d feared.

He covered his face with his hands again as some of the phrases came back to him. _Fucking talented at piano. About time we get Mike on his back. The way he watched Chester cum. They really moaned each other’s names. Chester must actually give good head, did you see Mike’s face? So real. So real. So real._ Chester had been right. He didn’t need to see any of that. It didn’t help anything, had only made him so mad he thought about driving to YRS to confront Mark again. But that didn’t last long, as more memories came to mind, the way Mark barked orders at Chester, the way he’d threatened to fire Mike. It was a losing battle. _And the way he always says Chester is his. No, he calls him Chaz. Chaz belongs to me._ Mike rubbed his temples. _His name is Chester. And he’s mine._

Mike felt the breeze on his hands and uncovered his face, letting the air cool his hot cheeks. _I wish we could leave. I know why he won’t go, but… can’t he see, it’s getting worse? And it’s causing us to fight. I don’t want to fight. I don’t want to lose him. I wouldn’t even know what to do if we weren’t together anymore. That’s not how it’s supposed to be. I gave him all of me. My heart and my body, we’re supposed to last. We’re not supposed to end because of Mark._

Mike’s phone vibrated, and he reached for it with a short lived moment of relief, thinking it was Chester. It was Jason. 

“Hello?” Mike said flatly. He wasn’t in the mood to talk to anyone from YRS, but he knew better than to ignore a call from either of his bosses.

“Hey, Mike. I, uh… I wanted to check on you guys. How’s Chaz feeling?” Jason sounded tired, but Mike didn’t care.

“He’s fine.” Mike let the statement sit there awkwardly. He didn’t feel like telling Jason that he had no idea how Chester was doing, since he’d abandoned him at the loft. _I’m the worst boyfriend ever. I should go home._

“Okay. Listen, Mike… I also wanted to tell you again, I’m sorry. I’d take it down if I could.”

Mike could tell Jason’s lips were close to the phone, and it sounded like he was cupping his hand around it, too. Trying not to be heard.

“I would, I swear to you. Ry’s going to kill me when he finds out. He and Chaz… well, you know.” Jason’s voice trailed off for a minute, but then he was whispering again. “Mike, is Ry with you guys? He’s not answering his phone.”

“No, he’s not,” Mike said, straightening up in his chair, his mind suddenly more alert. “Jason, if you’re just calling to look for Ryan, then we’re done. I don’t have anything to say to you right now.” He was ready to end the call when he heard Jason start to say something else in his normal tone of voice.

“... was just calling to let you know that you’ve got the rest of the weekend off. There’s some sort of stomach virus going around. We’ll see you next Friday.”

Mike rolled his eyes. “Thanks.” He clicked off the line. _I guess Mark walked in. I know Jason wished he could get the fuck out of there too. I don’t know why he assumed Ryan would be with us. Chester knows better than to have him over to the loft without me. Even if Ryan’s in love with Jason, I still don’t like the way Ryan looks at him. Touches him sometimes._

He stood up, taking his empty coffee cup to the trash can. It was time to go home, to face up to how hurtful his words had been earlier. To apologize for walking out, and to reassure Chester that they were in this together. No matter what happened. 

He drove home with all the scenarios playing out in his mind. Packing up and disappearing tonight was his favorite, and he let the idea bounce around in his head. _I don’t know how we’d get all of Chester’s clothes in my car. We’d have to leave everything else behind. And then Mark would take it all. My paintings. My piano._ He frowned. _If we leave, I can’t start school. And I really, really want to start school. Maybe this is the worst of it. Maybe after this, if I just play the role of obedient porn slave, he’ll leave us alone. Leave Chester alone._ The way his boyfriend closed in on himself every time Mark threatened them made Mike’s heart ache. _I’ve got to do better. I’m causing Chester to suffer. And I don’t want that._

The drive took longer than he wanted, and Mike was anxious to make amends by the time he pulled into his parking spot next to Chester’s car. He breathed a sigh of relief - what felt like the hundredth of the day. _At least he’s home. I have to go fix things. We can’t go to sleep without talking this out._

Mike was prepared for anything except a dark apartment, and when he opened the door and realized Chester wasn’t there, it was a small leap to connect his absence and Ryan’s absence. _They’re together. I know it. I knew I shouldn’t have left._ He threw his keys down on the coffee table, cringing as they crashed louder than he was expecting. _He didn’t even bother to tell me where he was going._ Right on the heels of that thought, he realized he’d done the same thing earlier when he’d stormed out without an explanation. _Fuck. I’m not going to call. I’m just going to wait it out. I won’t apologize if I call, I’ll just be upset again. I need to calm down before he gets back._

He kicked off his shoes and lay down on the couch. _I’ll just wait here. Surely he won’t stay out all night._

****

“It’s number six,” Chester giggled as he stumbled into the elevator, with Ryan right behind him. 

“You’re going to fall,” Ryan half laughed as he steadied Chester next to him, holding their bodies close together. “And I know what floor you live on, dorkous.” 

Chester’s eyes fluttered a little as the elevator soared upward. He was sandwiched between Ryan’s taller, stronger body and the wall of the elevator, but he still felt like he could fall at any minute. Four drinks down, and he was past the point of a little drunk. “If Mike’s not here, you can’t stay,” he said, as he clutched Ryan’s arm with one hand and the foil wrapped double order of mozzarellas sticks in the other. He could smell the fried cheese, and already he was planning on snagging at least one from the stash he’d brought for his boyfriend. There were twelve cheese sticks in all, and two tubs of marinara sauce, so surely Mike would let him have at least one.

“What do you mean?” Ryan asked as the elevator dinged, and the two men clumsily stepped out into the empty hallway. “I’ve been to your place loads of times,” Ryan insisted as they walked, still clinging to each other. He had his arm wrapped around Chester’s back, his fingers clasped to the side of the oversized black hoodie his co-worker had worn to the bar. “I was there before Mike.” 

“He won’t like it,” Chester managed to say right as they got to the door. He pulled away from Ryan a little to try and find his keys in the front pockets of his hoodie, and when they weren’t there, he patted over his jean pockets. 

“Why doesn’t he like me?” Ryan asked as he watched Chester try to get his keys from the tiny front pocket of his pants. “We’re friends. I mean, you and me are friends. And we’ve been friends for years.” His words had trailed to a mumble as he reached for Chester’s pants. “You’re stuck,” he snorted as he tried to help Chester wrestle the keys free. The decorative keychain was caught on something, and as Ryan pulled, Chester’s whole body stumbled forward. “Chaz, just let me,” Ryan insisted. He shoved Chester’s hoodie up and out of the way so he could see to yank the keychain free from the string that had took hold of it. Ryan’s gaze flipped up and over his friend’s slender hips and flat stomach before he leaned back. “Here,” he mumbled handing over the keys. “And damn, Chazzy, even those tiny ass jeans are falling off of you. Are you eating okay?” 

Chester looked up from where he’d been staring at his keys, trying to find the right one for the door. “I’m fine,” he said, his head rolling a little. “There’s just been a lot of fucked up shit going on lately.” He gave up a second later trying to sort his keys with only one hand. “Hold these,” he insisted, shoving the foil package of food into Ryan’s arms. “And don’t say anything like that to Mike. He’ll worry. . .if he’s here.” 

“Okay,” Ryan agreed, his lips and eyes screwing up a bit. “If he’s not here, I’m staying. You’re drunk off your ass. I’m not leaving you alone. Your clumsy ass will fall and knock yourself out or something.” 

Chester stopped his mission to get the right key in the door as he turned around, his face going long and serious as he pointed one finger in the air. “I am not drunk,” he stated emphatically before he busted into snorts and laughter.

Ryan couldn’t help but to laugh back, before he swatted for Chester’s keys. “Just give me those. We’re going to wake up your neighbors _and_ turn fifty before you get the fucking door open. Which one is it?”

Chester pointed to the key with the bright red ring around the top. “That one. It’s red so I can find it after a night of drinking. Guess it worked!” He fell forward, clinging to Ryan’s arm, smashing his face into his bicep as he listened to the keys jingling. “I mean it, you can’t stay if he’s not here. He’s already so mad at me.” 

“We’ll see,” Ryan muttered as he got the door opened. “Come on.” He could feel Chester’s weight against him, and like he’d done a hundred times before, he scooped Chester into him. He wrapped his arm around the smaller man’s body as he gripped his hip between his jeans and the bare skin where Chester’s hoodie had been shoved up, as he walked him in. The lights were on, and Ryan had to assume Mike was home as he managed to shut the door with his foot while he balanced Chester, the cheese sticks, and the keys all at once. 

Mike sat up and looked toward the door, his eyes narrowing as he saw Chester stumble inside holding tight to Ryan. _He’s drunk. Damn it. I never should have left. He never would have gone out with him if I’d stayed home._ “Ches? You okay?” Mike ignored Ryan as he made his way over to them, ready to claim his boyfriend back.

“He’s pretty wasted,” Ryan said before he let Chester go enough to allow him to step away on his own. 

“I’m not,” Chester protested, his words slurred as he grabbed for the foiled wrapped cheese. “I need them for Sexy Boy,” he mumbled to Ryan. He took the food, and holding the offering out in front of him, he headed toward Mike, a grin on his face. “I brought you fried cheese like you like,” he said. “So you won’t be mad at me anymore.” 

Mike’s attention flicked to Ryan before he held out his arms and pulled Chester into them. “Aw, Ches, I’m not mad at you.” Chester sagged into him as Mike steadied them both. “I do love fried cheese, but you didn’t have to do that.” 

Chester pulled back just a little as he tried to find Mike’s eyes. “But you like them,” he stated, before he twisted in his boyfriend’s arms to look behind him. “Right, Ry? I told you, he likes them!” He turned back around, his face going still for a second. “I’m sorry about before,” he apologized quietly. 

“I came home wanting to tell you the same thing, and I was worried about you. You know how much I worry about you, especially going out and drinking,” Mike said back just as quietly. “I’m sorry, too, for leaving. I’m not mad at you,” he stated again, rubbing a hand over Chester’s back. “You smell like cigarette smoke. I guess you weren’t at Ryan’s place, then? You went out?” He looked over Chester’s shoulder at Ryan. _At least they weren’t alone at his place. The drinking is bad enough. I don’t think I could stand knowing they were holed up some place private, together._

Chester shook his head. “No, we were at the bar. They had the cheese sticks. Ryan can’t cook cheese sticks,” he said, the idea of his friend trying to deep fry anything popped into his mind, and he laughed. 

Ryan walked over to the kitchen bar and set Chester’s keys down. “Looks like you have him okay,” he said, waving a hand toward Mike. “Here’s his keys. Our Uber is downstairs waiting.” 

“Right. The cheese.” Mike took the cheese sticks from Chester’s hands and guided him to the couch. “Sit down, babe, I’m going to see Ryan out. Okay? Then we’ll eat these together. Okay?” He set the package on the coffee table and settled Chester down. “Don’t move,” he said, somewhat sternly. 

Chester nodded in agreement as he watched Mike cross the room back toward the door. “I’ll call you tomorrow!” he hollered, flapping his arm through the air at his friend, before he sat back and let his eyes slide shut. It was nice to be home. He wrapped his arms around himself before he tried to get his feet up on the coffee table. 

Mike shook his head as he followed Ryan to the door and out into the hallway. He let the door shut behind him and paused as Ryan turned back to look at him. “I… well, thanks for making sure he got home. Though I wish you guys wouldn’t get so drunk together. It’s not good for either of you.” He ran a hand through his hair and looked back at the door. He thought about making sure Ryan got back to his ride without a problem, but he seemed to be far less drunk than Chester. “How much did he drink? Do you know?” 

Ryan motioned through the air with his hand as he shook his head. “I don’t think he meant to drink as much as he did. He had four or five?” He squinted his eyes in thought. “He was upset. He told me about that happened. Mike, man, I’m so sorry. I, I haven’t talked to Jay yet, but I still can’t believe he did that.” He looked away, his shoulders feeling heavy as he took an unintentional step back. “Mark must of made him.” 

“Fuck Mark. And right now, fuck Jason, too. He needs to learn to stand up for himself. He’s miserable, I don’t get why he goes along with things.” Mike knew it was really none of his business, and probably cruel to kick Ryan while he was drunk, but he was still seething over the whole incident from earlier. 

“It’s not Jay’s fault,” Ryan defended immediately, his voice coming out louder than he realized. “You have no idea what he’s going through. I’m sorry, Mike, and I know Jay is, too. Chaz doesn’t blame him,” he insisted as he pointed toward the closed door of the apartment. “I sat and I listened to him pour his heart out tonight, and he’s mad and upset about a lot of things, but he’s not blaming Jason. Jason’s one of us,” he said, tapping his chest before he dropped his eyes to the polished floor of the hallway. He knew Chester wouldn’t want him to fight with Mike, not over something that was so delicate and close to home. 

“One of us… okay,” Mike said skeptically. “He’s got way more power than any of us. I still think he could have said no. But like Ches says, I don’t really get it. All I know is everything feels fucked up right now, and Jason could have stopped it. He came over here, Ryan. We talked and he seemed like he was on our side.” Mike looked away before Ryan could look up. “And now all we can do is try to put everything back together. That’s what I wanted to do, and Ches is _four or five_ drinks in. That’s not helping anything.”

“Jay came over here? To talk to you?” Ryan asked, but the look on Mike’s face told him that he wasn’t going to get any more information than that. “Look, I gotta get going,” he mumbled instead. He wasn’t sober, but he felt like he was thinking a lot straighter than he had been ten minutes ago. He went to leave, but turned back around, catching Mike’s attention before he could go back inside. “Chaz said something about you wanting to _move_ to Colorado. . .you’re not really thinking about doing that, are you?” 

Mike’s eyes snapped back to Ryan. “He told you that? Of course he did. He tells you _everything._ ” He couldn’t help the snotty, jealous tone in his voice. He didn’t like the way Chester overshared details about their lives with Ryan. “I don’t know. After what happened today, I just want to get out of there, but Ches thinks Mark will follow us anywhere to take back “what’s his.” If we leave, trust me… there won’t be a way to find us until I know I’ve got us out of those contracts. If I could convince him, we’d be gone tonight. But, not now. I can’t talk to him about it like this.” He gestured toward the loft. “Don’t worry, I’m sure he’d find a way to say bye to you.” 

Ryan’s hand went to his heart as he felt the sting in Mike’s words. He shut his eyes for just a second, thinking about Chester and how much he knew he loved Mike. “He’s my friend,” he finally said with a swallow. “One of my only friends. . .and I’d really miss him if you took him away.” He looked over Mike’s shoulder at the door. “And he’s not wrong about Mark.” His eyes dropped to meet Mike’s in a hard stare. “You talk to Jason, apparently. Next time you chat with him, ask him how things went when he tried to leave Mark.” His fist clenched before he let out a breath. “Tell Chaz I’ll call him tomorrow. Have a good night, Mike.” 

Ryan was already halfway down the hall before Mike thought to say anything else, and by then, it just felt awkward. _Chester told me something about Jason leaving, but he didn’t go into a lot of detail. But that’s different. They’re married. Mark has no claim to Ches. None. Fuck his contract._ He didn’t spare Ryan another glance before he turned and went back inside the loft. Chester was exactly where he’d left him, and Mike breathed a sigh of relief as he walked back to the couch and sat down next to him. “Ches? You awake?” he asked looking over at Chester’s closed eyes and crossed arms. 

Chester’s head rolled a little as he looked over at his boyfriend. “I’m awake,” he said, blinking as he scanned the coffee table, and then behind him toward the kitchen. “My eyes are dry. . .where’s Ryan?” He balled his fists into the sleeves of his hoodie as he rubbed at the corner of his eyes and tried to sit forward, his head still spinning a little. 

“He went home, babe,” Mike said softly, reaching out to run his fingers over Chester’s striped beanie. “He said you had a lot to drink… I’m sorry I didn’t call. Or text. I wanted to clear my head, and I ended up at Joe’s… just talking a little bit. And I realized I shouldn’t have left you here alone. You didn’t do anything wrong. I’m sorry.” His fingers slipped down the side of Chester’s face, then over to his lip ring where he touched it gently. “I came home to tell you that, and when you weren’t here, I just… I didn’t want to tell you over the phone. I wanted to look at you when I told you I was being unfair.” 

Chester reached for Mike’s hand. “It’s okay,” he assured him. “I wasn’t being nice either. And you told me, you told me I shouldn’t drink alone. That’s why I went to the bar.” A smile slipped across his lips as he held Mike’s hand in his lap. “Is Joe doing okay?” 

“I think so. I didn’t really let him talk much,” Mike admitted. “I guess drinking with Ryan is better than drinking alone. But what I really meant is that I didn’t want you to drink at all.” He swallowed and looked down at their hands. “Did you eat anything? Or just drink? Do you want some cheese? I’ll share.” 

“Just your sandwich from before,” Chester said. “I’ll take one. I brought you lots of the sauce you like.” He grinned at Mike again before he leaned forward. He put one hand on the couch and one on Mike’s knee. “I’ve got to pee,” he whined as he stood himself up, giggling as he tumbled a little unsteady on his feet. 

Mike was quick to his feet beside Chester. “I think I need to take you in there. Doesn’t look like you’ll make it on your own.” He looped an arm around his boyfriend’s waist and walked them toward the bathroom. “Here. Put your hand on the wall and walk yourself over there,” he tried, hoping he wasn’t going to have to help Chester find the toilet. 

“I’m fine,” Chester insisted, as he lurched into the bathroom. “Shooo, Mike Shinoda,” he laughed as he waved for Mike to back away from the door. “Go eat your cheese. I’ll be okay.” Before Mike could say no, Chester shut the door and headed for the toilet, hoping to get his jeans undone before his bladder gave out. 

“Yeah, I’m gonna stay right outside the door,” Mike called, making sure he was loud enough to be heard. “You let me know if you need me, okay?” He waited anxiously, sure that the next sound he was going to hear would be Chester falling into the wall or tripping over his own feet. _God. I hope he doesn’t get sick. I know if I ever drank that much I’d be comatose or vomiting. Or vomiting and then comatose._

Chester flushed the toilet, and with his jeans and undone belt still hanging down off his hips, he made it to the door. “Miiiike,” he called, pulling on the handle. “I can’t get these up.” 

Mike opened the door and bit his lip, trying not to laugh at the mixture of sadness and frustration on Chester’s face. “Oh, Ches. You’re a mess, you know that? Come here.” Instead of letting Chester come to him, he stepped forward and grabbed him around the hips. “Damn, you smell like the bar,” he said, moving his hands to help with the jeans. 

“I know. I stink,” Chester almost cried. “You aren’t going to want to sleep with me now. We should take a shower,” he suggested, his arm flinging out to the side to point in that direction. “I’ll scrub your back,” he added with a hopeful half smile. 

“I don’t think you could find my back right now if you tried,” Mike chuckled. He stopped buttoning Chester’s jeans and looked at him carefully. “You think you can take a shower right now? You can stand up that long?” He wasn’t opposed to taking a shower and getting the smoke smell off Chester, but he wasn’t sure they’d make it out of the water without one of them falling over and getting hurt.

Chester raised his hand, one finger in the air. “I am not drunk,” he insisted with as much of a serious tone as he could come up with. “Just help me get out of this,” he stated, tugging at the oversized hoodie, “and I’m good.”

“You’re sooooo drunk,” Mike giggled, abandoning the button of the jeans and reaching for the bottom hem of Chester’s hoodie. Taking Chester’s clothes off was something he’d done more times than he could count at this point, but in Chester’s current inebriated state, it didn’t give him the same thrill of excitement it usually did. There was nothing sexy about pulling clothes off his boyfriend at the moment. Every garment was removed with care, keeping Chester balanced between his body and the wall, and trying to swipe Chester’s hands away from his own clothes. “Give me a second, Ches,” Mike mumbled breathlessly. “We can’t both get naked all at once. I’m trying to be careful with your drunk ass.”

“I love the way you’re careful,” Chester said, his weight moving forward as he leaned on Mike’s shoulder a little. “I’d help, but I think I’m being counterproductive.” He tired to hold his straight face, but it came out in a laugh. 

Mike couldn’t help the snort of laughter that followed Chester’s. “What am I going to do with you?” he asked, dropping to his knees to help Chester out of his jeans and underwear. “Here, put your hands on my shoulders to keep your balance, babe. Come on, step out,” he coaxed, trying to get Chester to lift his foot. 

One hand was on Mike’s shoulder, but the other had gone to his boyfriend’s head of blue hair. “I want to use whatever shampoo you’ve been using,” Chester announced as he balanced on one leg, while Mike managed to get his other free. “Your hair is so soft. It’s softer than mine. And, I don’t think that’s fair.” 

“I like that you smell like peaches,” Mike said softly, looking up as he freed Chester from the last bit of his clothing. He stood up and planted a soft kiss straight to his boyfriend’s parted lips. “But if you want me to, I’ll wash your hair with my shampoo.” He moved Chester’s hands to brace against the wall while he undressed quickly. “You ready to try this? I swear, you better not pull us both down. You’re _sure_ you can stand up?” Mike looked skeptically at the shower. If all else failed, he’d just have Chester sit on the floor until he could get him clean. 

“I think I’ll be fine. Look! I’m standing now,” Chester said, pushing himself from the wall, and stumbling back half a step. “And I’m very ready. Miiike, I smell,” he insisted with a pout. 

“Yes, you do,” Mike agreed, catching Chester’s stumble and rolling his eyes. “If you smelled good I’d just put you in bed to sleep this off. But here we go.” He wrapped his arm around Chester’s waist and pulled them into the shower together. “Now, I don’t want to hear a word about the temperature of the water. Stand back here while I warm it up.” He reached for and turned the water on, making a face when the cold water hit him. 

“That’s way too cold,” Chester whined anyway as he watched Mike mess with the knobs. “I like it hot. But not too hot. And come here,” he begged, pawing his fingers toward Mike’s naked back. He kept his other hand on the wall, but he was pretty sure he could grab Mike’s arm, at least. The shower wasn’t that big, but at the moment his lover seemed twelve feet away. 

“You’re so dramatic.” Mike turned and put both arms around Chester, keeping them balanced. “It will warm up in a second, and then I’ll have you falling asleep on me because it’s so cozy in here and, yeah, you’re so wasted.” He couldn’t help but tease when Chester kept insisting that he wasn’t drunk, and even the irritation he’d initially felt when he came home hanging on Ryan was gone. Chester was adorable when he was drunk and trying to make Mike not be mad at him, and he knew it.

Chester slid his arms around his boyfriend’s waist. “It’s getting warmer,” he stated, like Mike would have no idea what the temperature of the water was. “I want to wash you. You know? I’ll get you clean, since I’ve made you smelly. Where’s the soap?” He went to let go of Mike’s wet skin, his eyes and head off balance as he looked around. 

“Nope,” Mike said, keeping a hand on Chester. “I’m taking care of you. And I’m not smelly. You’re smelling yourself.” Mike stuck his tongue out between his teeth as he smiled and reached for Chester’s bath puff. “I’ve totally got this.”

He somehow managed to get body wash on the puff quickly, and Chester somehow managed to keep his balance while he did it. “I’m gonna be quick,” he said, squashing the puff in his hand and getting the bubbles going. “Your only job is to not fall over.” Before Chester could protest, Mike was moving the sponge up one arm, across his chest, and down the other, taking enough time to cover each place in soapy bubbles, but not lingering. 

“That feels good,” Chester half moaned as he tried to follow Mike’s movements with his free hand. “But maybe a little more here,” he suggested, swiping his hand over his very wet and soapy cock. He flashed Mike a smile. “He likes it when you touch him with the sponge.” 

“Chester Bennington, I think you need to behave yourself,” Mike admonished, even as he took a swipe lower on Chester’s abdomen with the bath puff. “We came in here to get clean. You stay still, I’m gonna get your legs. And _no_ waving your dick in my face, I’m washing your body right now.” He fixed Chester with as serious of a stare as he could manage, even though the look on Chester’s face was a mixture of hurt puppy and sassy, sexy lover. Mike wasn’t sure how he was even pulling that look off. 

Chester watched as Mike crouched down in front of him. “But my dick loves you,” he said, twirling his fingers through Mike’s wet hair while he tried to watch what he was doing. “You’re his favorite person in the whole entire world! Surely that means something to you.” He tried to swivel his hips, just to get a little bit of movement going, but it wasn’t coming off nearly as sexy as he’d hoped. 

Mike put a hand on Chester’s hip to still him before he lost his balance and toppled over on him. “And I love him. But I’m trying to do a job here, and you’re making it hard.” His face busted into a grin as Chester snorted at the word ‘hard.’ “Oh my god, you’re so immature sometimes.” He finished both legs and stood up, his hand still on Chester’s hip. “Turn around and let me get your back, and we’ll almost be out of here.” 

“I just want to say, that you’re the one using all the dirty immature words,” Chester chuckled before he managed to turn around. “My ass is all yours!” He practically yelled over his shoulder before he put his hands on the wall, feeling a rush hit his system, and for a moment the shower stall was spinning. 

Mike ran the sponge all over Chester’s back, and then down to his ass, taking care to keep the puff between his hand and Chester’s skin until he was finished. The main objective of the shower had been reached, except for washing Chester’s hair, and Mike wasn’t sure how that would go. “Okay, babe, hair time. You keep holding on to that wall.” He rinsed out the sponge and hung it up, then reached for his coconut shampoo. He really wanted to reach out and squeeze Chester’s ass, his skin that was pink from the heat of the water, but he made himself hold back. _Not while he’s drunk._

“I don’t want to hold this wall anymore,” Chester whined before he let go and turned around. “I can face you, oh! Give me,” he begged, flapping his hand toward the shampoo bottle in Mike’s hand. “I’ll wash your hair while you wash mine and we’ll save time!” 

“Oh my God,” Mike said again, shaking his head. “You can barely keep your balance holding the wall, no way you’re washing my hair. But hey, I’ll let you watch if you’re good.” He winked, hoping Chester would take it the way he intended, and cooperate a little more. 

Chester’s eyes narrowed a little as he tried to piece that logic together. He knew Mike was in a hurry. He knew he really wanted to sit down. . .or lay down. He knew he was thirsty. He knew Mike still needed to be scrubbed down and he knew he was having a fun time looking his boyfriend up and down as he stood naked in front of him. “Fuck my hair,” he decided as he went to grab for the bath poof. “I want to wash you now.” He was ready to grab the soap and get some bubbles all over Mike Shinoda. “My hair is wet, it’s clean enough. Here, I’ll rub a soapy hand through it,” he offered as he took the bath poof and slid it over his body to gather a bit of suds on it before mopping it over his dripping wet mohawk. “Done!” 

“That so doesn’t count,” Mike fussed. “I’m washing your hair - quickly - so just stand still. Yeah. Just hold the puff. No, Chester, stop rubbing it all over your nipples and making that face. I swear, just let me finish this so I can get clean and we can get out.” He shoved his shampoo covered hands into Chester’s wet hair and scrubbed them around good for ten seconds. “Come on, close your eyes and let’s rinse this out.”

Chester only half grumbled as he did what he was told. He held onto the puff as he let Mike get his head under the water and rinse away the shampoo. When it was done, Chester wiped the water from his face. “Come on, now,” he said, his voice still a little slurry. “Turn around and _you_ can hold the wall. I’ll wash your back,” he offered with a sly grin. 

Mike sighed, looked at Chester, and against his better judgement, turned around. “Don’t hurt yourself, okay?”

“Mike, Sexy Boy, I’m not drunk,” he insisted as he slid one hand down Mike’s wet side, till his fingers wrapped around his hip bone. “I’m totally with it,” he tried to whisper before he dragged the bath puff down Mike’s back, making some odd zigzag patterns and then dabbing it here and there, though he wasn’t sure why. But it seemed to be working because there was soap everywhere. “Are you feeling clean yet?” he asked, leaning a little closer, trying to get his lips close to Mike’s ear. 

“Mostly,” Mike giggled, turning around carefully to grab Chester around the waist. “Though I think you missed a few spots. Give me some bubbles on the front and we’ll get out of here.”

Chester slid the soap puff down Mike’s chest. His goofy smile faded as he watched the suds form over his lover’s skin. “It’s been a shitty day, Mike,” he mumbled before he looked up, meeting his boyfriend’s dark eyes. “But I still love us,” he managed to say before he leaned forward. His eyes were already falling shut as he aimed for Mike’s lips. He wanted a kiss. He wanted Mike’s warmth and touch. He wanted their bodies to press together under the water and spread the bubbles between their skin.

Mike steadied his hands as Chester fell into him, holding him by the hips while their lips met in a familiar kiss. The water was warm, the kiss was warm, and even though Mike was worried about how much alcohol Chester still had in his system, he was relieved that they weren’t fighting. Everything would turn out okay between them. He felt Chester’s hands rubbing bubbles across his skin and wondered briefly where the bath puff had disappeared to, but it didn’t matter. All that mattered was they were together, forgiven, and it was all going to be okay. He’d worry about Chester’s drinking tomorrow.

Their kiss lasted only a few seconds before Chester pulled back, his eyes drifting between open and shut. “Mike, I think this water is giving me a headache. Let’s go to bed instead.” He didn’t wait. His thoughts zipped from one idea to the next in an intoxicated fog. He let go of his lover and went to step right out of the shower. 

“Wait, wait!” Mike said hastily, trying to keep his balance and Chester’s. “You’re gonna drip all over the floor. And I’ve still got soap on me. Just wait a sec.” He waited to see that Chester was staying inside the shower enclosure before he made a quick turn in the water to get the bubbles off, and turned off the shower. The bathroom was steamy and quiet, and Mike reached for a towel to wrap around Chester’s shoulders. “Can you dry yourself off without falling?” 

“Of course, Sexy Boy,” Chester half laughed as he started to rub the towel around his chest and over his hair. “I think I’m sobering up a little. NOT that I was drunk,” he insisted as he tossed Mike a sideways glance. _Not drunk. Getting sober. I just want to lay down. I’m so tired._ He did his best to not stumble as he wiped off his legs and lower parts before he looked around the bathroom. “Where’s my clothes?” 

Mike finished toweling off his hair and tossed his towel toward the hamper, then reached for Chester’s. “Upstairs. We didn’t exactly plan this shower. You’re gonna have to go upstairs naked. Think you can manage?” he asked with a smirk. “Here, take my arm, babe.” He started to lead them out of the bathroom even though there were still droplets of water on both of them from their less than thorough drying jobs. 

“We’re managing,” Chester mumbled as he let Mike lead the way up the stairs. He let out a yawn. “I just want to lay down. You’re laying down with me, right? I’m not smelly anymore.”

“Of course.” Mike got Chester to the bed and he immediately flopped down right in the center of the blanket, not even bothering to pull it back first. He stood next the bed for a second, looking down at Chester’s back and his long arms and legs, his face pressed into the black and red flannel that covered their bed. “Do you want some underwear? Pajamas?” Chester hadn’t slept naked in weeks, and Mike wasn’t quite sure what to do next. 

“I’m good!” Chester called, his voice muffled from the pillow. He patted his hand on the bed. “Mikey, come here and lay with meeee,” he whined with his eyes closed. He knew he wasn’t going to last long. Another minute or two and the blackness would take him, pulling him under to deep intoxicated slumber. Before that happened, he really wanted to feel his boyfriend in his arms, and he tried to lift his head to see where Mike had gone to. “Are you coming?” 

Mike pulled on his boxers and tugged his white t-shirt over his head. “Roll over and let me get these blankets out from under you. I don’t want you to freeze tonight.” He pulled and twisted the blankets out from under Chester’s heavy body with little help. “You’re almost asleep, aren’t you?” He pulled the blanket up over Chester’s back as he slid underneath the sheet and dropped a hand between his shoulder blades. 

“No,” Chester mumbled, though he wasn’t sure what the question had been. He felt Mike moving him, and the blankets covering his exposed body, and he knew he was safe. Their sheets were clean, and the faint scent of their flowery fabric softener drifted over Chester’s senses as his brain ticked down, ready to shut off. 

“I love you, Ches,” Mike whispered close to his ear, rubbing his hand all over the smoothness of his back and shoulders in slow circles. “We’re gonna be okay. I promise.” He tucked himself up against Chester’s side and closed his eyes, listening to his boyfriend breathe. _We’re together. We’re home. We’re okay._

****  
TBC


	37. An Unwelcome Offer

The next morning, Mike sat at the kitchen table, his chin in his hand, looking out the windows. _I wonder how long it will take him to sleep it off this time. Even the smell of coffee didn’t wake him up. I don’t know if I’ve ever seen him that drunk before. He must have really had a lot for it to have affected him so much._

He glanced down at his coffee cup in front of him and sighed. _I’ll just drink Chester’s. He probably won’t want it anyway. Probably orange juice. And Advil. I wish I could make him something good for breakfast. Something with protein. Like bacon and eggs._ Mike’s stomach rumbled in protest as he frowned sadly at the early morning haziness outside the loft windows. _I wish he was up making us breakfast. We need to talk about stuff. Really talk, not the kind of talking we did in the shower last night. He probably won’t remember most of that anyway._ Even though it had been pretty cute the night before, the thought of soapy, drunk Chester pinched at his heart a little this morning. 

It wasn’t just coming home drunk last night that had him worried. It was the constant flow of alcohol at YRS, the easy and casual way Chester seemed to be able to find a drink no matter where they were, the unobtrusive way he managed to drink a few without anyone seeming to notice. There was that stashed away bottle of rum he’d seen in Chester’s suitcase on their mini-vacation, and Mike didn’t even know how many drinks he’d missed in the past few months. _He’s not going to like it when I bring it up. He’s going to think it’s about last night, about Ryan. And it’s not. It’s really not. Though Ryan does seem to be around for it most of the time._

Mike stood up from the table and grabbed his cup for the refill he’d been thinking about. The coffee still in the pot was lukewarm at best, but it would have to do. He poured it into his cup and slowly made his way back over to the windows. These were windows he stared out of often, in all sorts of moods. This morning it felt like he was searching the sky for answers to questions he wasn’t sure he even wanted to ask. _I don’t want to fight anymore. I hate fighting with him. And one day... one day he might decide I’m more trouble than I’m worth. Always worrying, he tells me. Well, I wouldn’t worry if he didn’t give me so much to worry about. I love him so much._

His eyes dropped down to the sidewalk, then over to a patch of grass where a bird was poking its beak into the dew-soft earth. _If I mention the drinking to him, really talk about it, not just gloss over it, he’ll try to tell me it’s not a big deal. But I’m not wrong. He’s been drinking more and I especially don’t want him to do it at YRS. It makes him an easier target for Mark. What if I wasn’t around? What if he’s had too much and Mark steps in to take care of him?_ Mike’s stomach twisted painfully. _He would. He’d take advantage and then probably try to act like Ches wanted it. He’s sick. I hate him so much._

The bird below was too far away for Mike to see whether she’d gotten her breakfast or not as she flew away, and his eyes followed her until the speck of her body disappeared into the haze. _I wish we could get away like that. Fly away. Run away. Never come back. And I wouldn’t let him bring any rum this time. If that’s what he’s using as an escape, why can’t he just use me? I’ll take him away from all the bad things and keep him safe. He doesn’t think I can do it._

The thought was a new one, and Mike tried to shake it away. _No. He loves me. He trusts me, I know he does. He’s right. I’m worrying too much. I just need to tell him that I’m concerned about it, and maybe he won’t be upset if he knows it’s just coming from that kind of place. Love and concern. We can talk it out. I can help, if he’ll let me._

He ambled back into the kitchen and opened the freezer, poking inside with one hand. Frozen waffles would have to do in a pinch, and since it seemed like Chester wasn’t waking up anytime soon, Mike popped two into the toaster and leaned against the counter to wait. _We haven’t really even talked about the video yet, either. Maybe there’s nothing really to say. If Jason won’t or can’t take it down, there’s nothing we can do about it. Nothing. Not unless we leave. And Ches won’t leave. God, we were so stupid to do that on Brad’s blankets._

Mike’s breathing seized up for a moment and his whole being went still. _The cursed blankets. None of that stuff Brad says is true, but Chester will believe it. He’ll blame it on the blankets, and on himself, instead of putting the blame where it belongs. On Mark. On Jason. Brad mentioned heartbreak… maybe this is it. No. I can’t put any truth into those visions. One of us has to be level headed about it. He can’t be right. Brad can’t be right._ The pop of the toaster jarred him from his thoughts and he jumped, then rolled his eyes at himself. _See, Shinoda? You’re working yourself up over nothing._ He grabbed the waffles and tossed them on a plate, their thin manufactured profiles not appearing nearly as appetizing as Chester’s homemade fluffy ones. 

He carried the plate and the syrup back to the table and cocked his head as he sat down, listening for any sounds from the loft above. _I’ll eat, and then I’ll go back up there. I don’t want him to wake up alone. He’ll probably think I’m still mad at him. He won’t remember last night. He won’t remember the cheese or the shower or the way I rubbed his back until he fell asleep. I should be there when he wakes up._

After scarfing down two unsatisfying waffles and rinsing his sticky plate, Mike quickly brushed his teeth and then went back to Chester, climbing the steps to the bedroom quietly with the taste of syrup still on his tongue. There was no hesitation as he pulled the blanket back carefully and slid in behind his boyfriend, who was laying on his stomach with one arm under his pillow and the other flung out to the side. Mike slid his arm up under the pillow alongside Chester’s and ghosted his lips over the exposed shoulder in front of him. 

Somewhere in Chester’s sleepy mind, he recognized the sudden change in temperature. He felt Mike’s body curl up against his, and the gentle press of his boyfriend’s lips. It was an effort to open his eyes, but Chester managed it. For a second the room - the staircase, the nightstand, the floor, the flannel sheets on the bed - all looked foreign, like he was waking up in a strange place and he didn’t have the energy or the will to do anything about it. His stomach felt uneasy as he wet his dry lips and softly croaked, “Mike?” 

“Yeah, babe… right here,” Mike whispered against Chester’s ear. He closed his eyes and breathed in the scent of his coconut shampoo in Chester’s hair and smiled. “How ya’ feelin?”

Chester dragged one hand to his face, shielding his eyes. “It’s bright,” he mumbled before he maneuvered around, flipping himself over onto his back so he could turn his head in Mike’s direction. “What time is it?” he asked from behind his hand. 

“Almost nine,” Mike answered, raising his hand to help block some of the light. “You’ve been out since I got you in bed last night. Like, hardly moved. I’ve already been up, had coffee… and breakfast, I guess. Frozen waffles. Not as good as yours, not even close.” He reached down to pull the blanket up and over their heads, making a little tent. “There. Move your hand. I made it darker.” 

Chester dropped his hand, but kept his eyes closed for a few seconds before he dared to let them creep open. “I don’t remember,” he said, pressing his fingers to his forehead. “Coming to bed. . .I don’t remember. Ryan,” he mumbled. “Did Ryan get home okay?” The thought to find his phone to make sure crossed Chester’s mind, but that would involve moving and he wasn’t ready. As long as his bladder was holding out, he was staying put. He reached forward, his hand grazing over Mike’s t-shirt. 

“I’m sure he’s fine. He had a ride home. He was sober enough to get you back here safely, so he was sober enough to get himself home.” _I think._ Mike’s eyes drifted up Chester’s arm and to his worried eyes. “You want me to check on him for you? Want me to go get your phone?” He wanted to set Chester’s mind at ease, and not just because he wanted to talk about other things. 

“Would you?” Chester asked. “I, I don’t know where it’s at.” He reached down to pat over his pockets, but stopped. “I’m naked,” he said out loud like it was a surprise. “Okay. . .so I obviously don’t have it. Fuck,” he swore under his breath before he went to sit up, pushing Mike’s makeshift tent out of the way. “It’s okay, Mike,” he assured him with a soft smile, the best he could muster. “Thanks for trying.” He nodded toward the blanket as he sat up and hung his head into his hands. _Now I do have to pee. And I need to find my phone and check on Ry. And apologize to Mike. . .I know he’s upset, even if he isn’t saying anything. How much did I drink?_

Mike watched as Chester rubbed his fingers over his temples, his shoulders slumped forward. He sat up and his hand went right to Chester’s back, rubbing smooth circles over his skin. “You’re surprised you’re naked in bed with me? You really don’t remember last night, do you? Ryan didn’t even know how much you’d had to drink, and you weren’t able to tell me either. You _did_ want me to spend a lot of time washing your soapy cock in the shower, though,” he said, a laugh following his words as he scooted forward and pressed another kiss to Chester’s shoulder. “You were cute. But now you look like you’re not feeling so great.” 

Chester picked his head up and looked over, his eyes meeting his lover’s in a soft stare. “My soapy cock?” He narrowed his eyes in thought as he tried to search through his memories and pull up some kind of information to match what Mike was talking about, but it wasn’t there. “How did I get soapy? Gooood,” he moaned as he turned away and ran both hands down the sides of his face. “I’m sorry,” he added before he let out a groan. “I didn’t mean to drink so much. I think. I just went for one, and that turned into two and then. . .obviously more,” he admitted before he turned and swung his legs off the side of the bed. He knew he needed to get up, but that meant going to the closet and finding clothes, which felt like a lot of work. 

“You got soapy in the shower I helped you with, since you smelled like an ashtray when you got home,” Mike said pointedly, before his voice softened a little. “And I know you didn’t _mean_ to drink so much. You never do.” He bit down on his lip and squinted a bit as he watched Chester’s backside. He wasn’t sure if his boyfriend was feeling unwell or if he was just waiting to see what Mike had to say, but Chester hadn’t moved and Mike was sure his words hadn’t helped. “But we can talk about that later,” he added, smoothing his hands over the blanket. “You want me to get you anything? Coffee? Juice? A waffle?” 

Chester rubbed his forehead. He knew his boyfriend meant well, but the round of questions felt overwhelming. “I’m fine,” he managed to say as he stood himself up. “I’m sorry, Mike,” he said again as he headed for his closet. “Just give me a few minutes. I’ll get dressed and meet you downstairs.” He opened the doors and squint at the rows of shirts and pants he knew by heart. He grabbed a dark gray t-shirt and a pair of jeans before he shut the doors and walked over to the dresser, holding his clothes in front of him like a shield. 

Reluctantly Mike got out of bed and headed for the stairs. Already things weren’t going the way he’d expected, and all he’d wanted to do was be there when Chester woke up. _And the first thing he asks about is Ryan._ He tossed Chesters cell phone a bitter glance as he passed the coffee table and headed back into the kitchen. _Might as well get the Advil ready._

Chester slowly pulled his clothes on, his body aching with each move, and his stomach doing somersaults. He glanced over at the stairs more than once, knowing he wasn’t being the nicest to Mike. _I’ll make it up to him. God, I feel sick._ He picked out a pair of gray socks with white across the toes and sat down on the bed. He pulled one leg up, and shuffled the sock over his foot. _I remember being at the bar. I told Ry about the video. We talked about Mike. And Jason._ He managed his other sock before he stood up. He looked around at the bed and the nightstand and even the dresser, but his phone was nowhere to be seen. _Must be downstairs._ He rubbed his hand over his neck and down his arm before he took the steps, slowly. 

He stepped into the living room and his eyes instantly went to the kitchen and to Mike, who looked like he was trying to figure something out. _Worried. He’s worried and pissed._ Chester’s attention bounced to the floor and then around the room to the couch and the coffee table and his phone. He stepped over and swiped it from the coffee table before he headed to the bathroom, his free hand holding his stomach. 

Mike didn’t say anything, just watched Chester cross straight to the bathroom after he picked up his phone. _He’ll be checking on Ryan. And then he’ll worry about me. He doesn’t even remember that things are okay between us, and he’s still gonna check on him first._ He swallowed down the bitterness and opened the cabinet for a glass to fill with water. _I’m being a baby. He’s not going to talk to me about anything if I’m acting like this. I wish it didn’t bother me so much. I wish he could see the things I see when they’re together. Then he’d understand why it bothers me. They know each other too well._ He filled the glass and walked over to the table, setting it in Chester’s place with the bottle of pills, and took his spot back in front of the window, his back to the living room. 

Chester came out of the bathroom, his head rearing to the side as he shut his eyes. “It’s fucking bright in here,” he complained, but he let it go. _I deserve it. I’m not going to take the sun away from Mike because I’m hungover._ He walked over to the table, and slumped down into his chair. “Thanks,” he said as he picked up the bottle of Advil. He wrestled with it, his fingers not doing what he wanted as he tried to get the child safety lid off. “Mike, I don’t remember taking the shower, but I guess we did. I smell clean,” he offered looking up from his task for a second, just to see Mike watching him intently. “So I have to, I mean, you walked out last night. But you’re here now, so that means we made up?” He paused, one eye closing as he looked at his lover. “Or was it an angry shower?” he asked, a little chuckle escaping his lips. 

“It wasn’t an angry shower,” Mike said, holding his hand out for the bottle. “You brought me fried cheese and you were being sweet, but I had already figured out I was wrong for leaving anyway. The cheese wasn’t necessary, but thank you. At least you were thinking about me while you were out.” He popped the top off the bottle and handed it back to Chester. “I went and talked with Joe when I left, just to kind of clear my head a little. And I realized I’d been upset with you and it really wasn’t fair. So… yeah, I guess we made up. It kinda doesn’t count if you don’t remember it, though,” he teased lightly, pulling his chair out to sit next to Chester. 

“Of course I was thinking about you. You’re all I ever talk about, you know that, right?” Chester asked as he dropped two pills into his palm before popping them into his mouth and chasing them with a drink of water. And then another. It was cold and wet and magical at the moment. He took another long swallow before he set the glass down. “Right? Mike, you know that. . .don’t you? When I’m out with Ryan, or whoever, you’re who I’m talking about. Us. I talk about us.” 

“Do you really?” The underlying tone of insecurity in his voice couldn’t be helped, and Mike winced a little as he looked at Chester. “I guess, I just… I don’t know, Ches.” He blew out a long breath and looked down at the table. “I know I worry too much and I make mistakes and I don’t always know how to handle how I’m feeling. I’m sorry I left. I’m sorry I do that. I don’t mean to leave you alone, sometimes I just need a minute to think. And I don’t know how to do that unless I’m by myself. I don’t want to make the wrong decision about something because I haven’t thought it through properly.” He picked at the knuckles on one hand as he spoke. “I’m only ever thinking about you, too. Talking about you. You’re my whole world, you know that?” 

Chester looked down at his hands wrapped around the glass of water. “Guess we’re both pathetic,” he said with a smile before he looked up. “I don’t blame you for leaving. I was being an ass.” He looked across the room, his eyes still dodging the bright morning light. “I can’t believe Jason or Mark. . .or, oh,” he said, his voice suddenly dropping as he dug through his pocket for his phone. “It’s Saturday!” he said in a panic as he went to get up. “Mike, we’re late for work! Mark’s going to kill me,” he muttered as he flipped through his contacts in a hurry. “I’ll call. I’ll tell him. . .something. We’re so screwed. He hates it when I’m late. When we’re late,” he amended absently.

“Sit down, Ches,” Mike said calmly, reaching out to grab onto Chester’s forearm. “We’re not going back this weekend. Jason called yesterday to say there’s some sickness going around and since you left early, and Amir apparently left, too, work’s off for the weekend.” He watched the confusion settle over Chester’s face, but he stayed in his chair. “Promise. Nobody’s working this weekend.” 

“Amir,” Chester mumbled. “Yeah. Yeah, Ryan told me that,” he recalled, the memory faint and hard to reach. “Ugh, I hate not being able to remember.” He sat forward, his eyes shut as he took another drink of water. “Good,” he decided. “I didn’t want to go back anyway. I’d be worthless today.” He waited a minute as he stared at the table before he sat back in his chair. He reached over, nudging Mike’s arm. “I’m glad we made up, even though I can’t remember. I hate it when we fight. And, what happened with the video. . .I should have known better. I just should have. I’ve been there long enough. I know how things go and I did it anyway. I even went and used the cursed blankets,” he grumbled as he looked up at the ceiling, and the industrial looking lights hanging over their heads. They weren’t nearly as bright as the sun. “I just made it that much worse for us.” 

Mike couldn’t help the soft snort of laughter as he thought about the blankets. “Chester. The blankets aren’t cursed. Mark’s just an asshole.” 

Chester’s head rolled as he looked back Mike’s way. “No, they’re cursed. Brad says so,” he insisted before he sat forward. “They’ve got bad aura or whatever it is. I can’t always follow him when he talks,” he admitted, feeling less than smart. He leaned his elbow on the table as he rested his head on the palm of his hand. “He knows that kind of stuff. And look what happened. And now our personal stuff is out there for people to see.” 

“I know,” Mike said softly, the awful reality of it all coming back to the surface. “And there’s nothing we can do about it, unless we leave, Ches, and I know that you won’t. All I was saying before I left was to think about it, you know? Don’t you think about what it would be like to not have to go back there - ever?” He reached over and feathered his fingers over Chester’s arm, tracing down his flames and back up again. “I think you’d be so much happier, and I know I would be. And maybe, maybe you wouldn’t feel like you need to go out and get smashed like you did last night. It scares me when you can’t remember things.” _There. I said it. Not exactly the way I wanted to, but it’s out there._ Mike kept his fingers in contact with Chester’s skin as he waited for his reaction. 

Mike’s touch was warm, and Chester allowed it as he shook his head. “I can’t leave,” he repeated for what felt like the thousandth time. “And you know why. Of course we’d be happier, but that’s not an option right now.” He looked over, and Mike’s big brown puppy eyes were waiting for him. “Don’t look at me like that,” Chester insisted as he pulled away and stood up from the table, his chair squeaking against the floor. “And I said I didn’t mean to drink as much as I did. It wasn’t the goal. I’m sorry if I worried you,” he added as he took his cup of water and headed for the couch. 

“I _know_ it’s not the goal,” Mike said tentatively. Chester walking away from him could mean he was finished with the conversation, or that he was finished with the sun, but either way, Mike knew he really needed to keep going. He stayed put at the table, watching as Chester dropped onto the couch. “I didn’t say you were doing it on purpose, Chester. I just want you to know that when you drink like you did last night, it worries me. Or even when you drink the way you do at work sometimes. I just… you know how I am. I just want you to be safe.” 

“I’m safe,” Chester stated instantly before he turned in his seat so he could see Mike still sitting at the table. “And at work, they, well,” he stopped his teeth raking over his lip ring as he looked away and over toward the bathroom. “They put it in front of us. It’s always there. I don’t even think about it anymore. Mark used to insist. Now I do it on my own and. . .damn,” he whispered as thoughts flooded his pounding head. _He’s right. Am I really drinking that much? Every weekend. Every day at work. And then here sometimes._ He turned back in his seat, looking at the darkened tv screen instead of his boyfriend. 

Mike looked out the windows again as they sat in silence. _I don’t know what to say. How far to push this. He’s just going to get mad at me. But, I’m right. Right? I think I’m right. It’s not just me being a goody-goody, like Amir says. Chester drinks too much and it’s not healthy. I’m trying to do the right thing. I’m always just trying to do the right thing._

He looked back over at Chester, who was stubbornly looking at the blank television. _The worst thing he can do is push me away, I guess._ He got up and went to sit down next to his boyfriend, putting every ounce of care and concern in his eyes that he could before he said, “Ches. I’m not trying to upset you. You _know_ me. I worry. And right now, it worries me to see you this morning, not remembering last night. Maybe you could just cut back a little, huh?” 

Chester knew what the right answer was. He needed to say yes. He needed to agree with Mike, and promise to do better. _But what happens if I can’t? I just can’t drink so much that I end up like this. That’s all. I agree. Not remembering sucks. Bad things happen when you can’t remember._ Before his thought had completely run its course, he was nodding. “I don’t like being like this either,” he agreed easily. “I know you’re right. It’s just become a habit, especially at work. Besides, it’s easier to be there sometimes when you’re only half feeling stuff.” He dropped his head as he shook it. “Not so much now that you’re there with me,” he said as his eyes drifted over to the knee of Mike’s dark jeans. “Guess it’s a sucky way of dealing with YRS and Mark.” 

Mike inched closer on the couch and laid his head on the back of it, his whole body relieved that Chester was agreeing so easily. “I’m there, now. And you know, you and I can stand up to Mark together better if you’re one hundred percent there with me. We’re a team, Ches. Even if you don’t want to speak up sometimes, that’s okay. I’m going to be better about my mouth, too. I know I’d feel better if I wasn’t worrying about Mark catching you drunk and alone some time.” He slapped his hand over his mouth after he realized he’d accused Chester of being drunk aloud. He’d been tiptoeing around it, and it somehow felt worse to say the actual word than he thought. 

A sort of laugh escaped Chester’s throat. “Mark’s seen me drunk too many times to count,” he muttered before he closed his eyes and leaned back on the couch. “My head is killing me. And I know that’s my own fault. Don’t even listen to me,” he decided as he stayed in the darkness behind his eyes. “And you don’t have to worry about me. I’ll get a handle on it.” His phone buzzed in his pocket a second later and he fumbled to retrieve it. He looked at the display, half flinching from the light of the screen. “It’s about time he answers,” he mumbled before his fingers zipped across the touch screen to send a return text. 

“Ryan?” Mike asked, knowing full well who it was. He didn’t wait for an answer. “I told you he was fine.” He watched Chester send a text before he looked back up at him. 

“I know,” Chester agreed before he let his phone drop to the couch. “But it never hurts to check.” 

“Do you feel better now, that you’ve heard from him? Come here,” Mike said, opening his arms and hoping Chester would allow himself to be pulled close. “We can take it easy for the day, we don’t have to be anywhere. We can do anything you want to do.” 

Chester scanned Mike’s offer before his eyes drifted up toward the lofted bedroom. “I’d love lay all over your lap,” he said, cracking a partial smile. “Go get us a pillow?” he asked, pointing up. 

“Anything you want.” Mike smiled, hopping up from the couch and leaning to plant a kiss on the top of Chester’s head. “One pillow, coming right up. Anything else, babe?” he called over his shoulder as he climbed the stairs. 

“Just a pillow,” Chester called as he rubbed his forehead. He half watched Mike disappear up the stairs before his phone buzzed again. 

**9:54 am** _Jay says we don’t have work today. Which is good since I’m still in bed._

**9:55 am** _Yeah. Already ahead of you on that. Mike says Jason told him that yesterday. My head is about to explode. I’m going to lay down._ Chester typed before hitting the send button just as Mike came back down with one of their bed pillows in his arms. 

Mike chose to ignore the phone as he sat back down next to Chester, offering him the pillow. “Where do you want it?” 

Chester was quick to throw it right into Mike’s lap before he laid down on his side, snuggling up to Mike’s leg, with his head resting on the best part of their bed. “Right here,” he said, his eyes already falling shut. “I just need to close my eyes. I’m not going to sleep.” 

“Sure, you’re not.” Mike bit down on his bottom lip to stifle the smile he felt coming as he lifted his hand to Chester’s hair. “You’ll be out the second I start doing this,” he said, flexing his fingers against Chester’s scalp and through his hair. “You love this.”

“Mhm,” Chester mumbled, his mind already drifting off. The pounding in his head was still there, but it had faded a bit, like Mike’s rubbing fingers were sending it away. “I do love that. You know me.” 

“I do,” Mike agreed, continuously stroking Chester’s head. “And I love you.” He watched Chester’s closed eyes until his face smoothed out into an easy sleep, and he rested his head on the back of the couch. _I’ll just close my eyes for a minute, too. We won’t sleep long. Just long enough for him to feel better when he wakes up._ Then Mike was out, too, before he could finish another thought. 

****

The extra time away from YRS had been a Godsend. Even though it only equalled out to an extra two days away from Mark and the others, it had been enough to revitalize Mike and Chester. The video of their private time together in the piano room was still front and center on the YRS website, and it wasn’t coming down anytime soon, which was something they had both managed to come to terms with. It was now part of work, an unexpected scene that YRS owned, and that was how they had to think of it. 

They would just make sure it never happened again. 

Somewhere between the drive to the hills and walking in the front doors of YRS, they had decided that they weren’t going to let it bother them. If anyone said anything - if Amir made a smart remark or the new guy launched into another fanboy session - they would simple shrug, smile, and nod. No one was going to get to see how they really felt about it. That they _could_ keep private. 

“I hope this weekend goes fast,” Chester said as he and Mike headed down the stairs after dropping their bags in their assigned room. “Jason’s usual shooting info in the email yesterday was weird. I think he’s stressed because it didn’t even really say anything.” 

Before Mike could answer, Ryan appeared at the bottom of the stairs. He waved at the two men, like they were coming from a long distance, not just down the staircase. “Morning Chazzy, Mike,” he said with a short smile that had barely been visible. “We’re being called into a meeting.” His words came out with a sigh as he scrubbed his fingers through his black, spiked hair. He hated meetings, and he knew Jason hated them even more. When things were running smoothly at YRS, meetings weren’t necessary. Mark usually only called them all together for two reasons: either something was wrong and someone was going to get their ass chewed, or he had new plans to announce. 

“Do we know why?” Chester asked as he got to the bottom of the stairs, his hands going to the hips of his black and red shorts. “I hate going into meetings without knowing what I’m walking into. Fuck. I hope it’s not about last weekend,” he grumbled with his lip curling. 

Mike slid his arm around Chester as he came to a stop behind him. “Maybe it’s another new guy. To even out the numbers from adding the other new guy.” He looked in the direction of the dining room, but didn’t see anyone else. “Whatever it is, I’m ready. No reaction. I’m going to be so good, you’ll be impressed, Ches.” He squeezed his fingertips into Chester’s side and brushed a quick kiss over his temple. _If I have to bite my tongue between my teeth, I’m not going to give Mark what he wants._

“Let’s hope it has nothing to do with that,” Chester said as he lightly leaned himself against Mike, before he went to follow Ryan. “Meetings first thing in the mornings are bad omens,” he whispered. 

Ryan glanced over his shoulder before he slowed his steps to walk more side-by-side with Chester. “That’s right. That’s what Brad always says. I can’t remember one good thing that ever came out of a morning meeting.” 

“It’s going to be fine,” Mike said, reaching for Chester’s hand. “Brad can’t be right all the time.” He thought about that for a second, how he was basically admitting that Brad could see the future, and he rolled his eyes. “Whatever it is, I hope there’s breakfast. I could really use one of Brad’s cinnamon rolls right now. That’s what he’s best at. Cooking. And I hope he’s been doing it.” 

A few steps later, and Chester was rubbing his stomach. “Breakfast burritos,” he crooned as he stopped and took a proper sniff of the air. “I’d bet my life on it,” he stated, squeezing Mike’s hand. “Sausage and egg...and peppers.” 

“Why does he always have to mess those up with peppers?” Mike complained, thinking about how he was going to have to pick the offending slimy green things out of his burrito. He ate a lot of things, but peppers weren’t one of them. “Smells like coffee’s already brewed, too. Thank goodness.” They entered the dining room and Mike was surprised to see that they were the first ones to make it down to the meeting. He glanced at his watch and then around the room before he pulled out the chair Chester always sat in. “I wonder where everyone else is.” 

“Who knows,” Ryan offered with a shrug. “Jay is probably tracking them all down.” He leaned forward to try and see in the kitchen, and he spotted Brad. “I’m going to see if he needs help.” He headed into the kitchen, ready to help and even more ready to get first dibs on the breakfast burritos. 

“I’m up for coffee,” Chester said with a yawn as he sat down, his elbows on the table. “I need an extra dose of caffeine before -” he stopped himself and took a second to look toward the doorway, but no one was there. “Before Mark starts in on us,” he said in a lowered voice. 

Mike sat down next to his boyfriend and leaned back, crossing his arms over his chest. “I just want to eat and get the plan so I can get my head ready for it. It’s weird not getting the plan in the email.” He tugged on the sleeves of his shirt as he thought things over. “I really don’t know what this could be about. But it sounds like the others are coming.” Mike turned and looked toward the living room where hushed voices and footsteps could be heard. 

In just a few seconds the dining room went from relative solitude to a burst of activity as everyone made their way in and to their seats. Mike watched Noah linger in the doorway and he remembered that uncertain feeling of not knowing where to go, but he didn’t have enough sympathy to offer his help. _Not after the way he acted when he met us. He can figure it out on his own._

Brad walked in a few seconds later, pushing his silver serving cart with the squeaky wheel. “Good morning, boys,” he said cheerily, and almost in unison, everyone returned the greeting. “Coffee and breakfast burritos this morning,” he told the room, even though the smell of sausage and peppers had already soaked through the entire dining room. “Noah, right?” he asked as he stopped, his curly hair everywhere as he looked from the scared looking redhead to the empty chairs around the table. “You can sit there,” he instructed as he pointed to Toby’s empty seat, and Brad let out a sigh and a slight shake of his head as he did. 

“Brad, I’ll do the coffee,” Ryan offered as he came out of the kitchen, wiping his mouth with the edge of his long-sleeved black shirt. He was already one breakfast burrito down. Brad nodded, and Ryan took the coffee pot from the cart. He headed around the table, quickly filling everyone’s coffee cups that were already in place. 

Brad picked up the large white china platter that was stacked full of foil wrapped burritos and one by one, he circled the table, leaving two in front of each person. “Chaz, here you go,” he said, carefully putting down two foil packages in front of him. “And Mike, I made these special just for you - no peppers and extra cheese.” He smiled as he sat the next two in front of Mike, both with blue marker across the foil that read _No Pep, Ex Cheese_. 

Mike looked up at Brad, his whole spirit lifting as he smiled. “Thanks, Brad. I didn’t know you’d even noticed I didn’t like them. That was really nice of you.” He reached for one of the burritos and read the marker across the top before he nudged Chester with his elbow. “Look, babe, these are just for me.”

“There’s a lot of things around here that are _just for you_ ,” Amir remarked drily, picking up the small container of sugar from the center of the table to spoon some into his coffee. “I sure wish I knew how you managed to get to be so important around here.” He stirred his coffee idly and watched Mike’s cheeks flush a soft pink. It was always satisfying to get under Mike’s skin, especially so early in the morning.

Chester rolled his eyes as he reached across the table and snatched the jar of sugar. “Don’t be a dick, Amir,” he half growled before plopping his butt back in his seat. “And I’m sure Brad would happily make your burritos special if he knew what you didn’t like, but it’s hard to tell when you complain about everything.” 

“Oh, Chazzy, it’s not complaining. I just like to stir things up a bit.” Amir winked at him, unaffected by Chester’s comment. “Now, who knows what this meeting is about?” He looked around the table, his eyes landing on Ryan. 

“You got me,” Ryan said with a shrug. “I don’t know anything more than you guys. And why should I?” he added just as Jason and Mark walked into the room. Ryan’s blue eyes stayed on Jason for a second, watching as he followed behind Mark. As he held a clipboard in his hand, along with his cellphone. His dark blue Polo dress shirt fit him snuggly, and Ryan smiled at the way it showed off Jason’s modest biceps. 

“Is everyone enjoying breakfast?” Mark asked as he rounded the table to stand behind his chair at the head. His gray eyes flipped from face to face to face, mentally checkmarking everyone off as being present. “How’s the coffee this morning?”

Nobody really said much in response, so Mike offered, “it’s hot,” and heard the amused snort from Amir across the table. He didn’t dare look up from his burrito to see if Mark was going to chastise him for being smart mouthed. _Damn. And I said I was going to be good._ He focused on peeling his foil back to take another bite.

Jason looked up from his clipboard toward Mike, but he didn’t say anything. There wasn’t any reason to get involved in whatever game Mike was trying to play this morning. His eyes slid over to Ryan and he took a deep, quiet breath. Everything in him wanted to stare, to take in all the little details about his lover that he’d missed the past week, but he knew better. A brief glance was all he could afford before Mark started speaking again.

“Everyone eat enough to get full,” he instructed just as Brad headed his way with the almost empty coffee pot. “As some of you probably noticed, this weekend’s schedule wasn’t much to look at.” He briefly told Brad thank you before he picked up his cup and took a quick sip of the black coffee before he leaned over and set it back on the table. He squeezed his large fingers into the backrest of his chair. “I hope you’re all feeling better,” he stated, his eyes darting from Amir over to Chester before he let out a long breath. “I need you all at your best because we’re going to be filming on location. We’ll be leaving Sunday morning.” 

Immediately questions and grumbles erupted from around the table, and Mark put his hand up. “I know, I know it’s short notice, fellas. But this is something we’ve had in the pipeline for awhile. What we didn’t expect was to get an opportunity on the house we’re going to be shooting at to come available so quickly. We had to jump on it. So, all next week,” he told them, pointing around the table. “Jason’s got all your flight and ticket information. You guys just need to pack and bring all your sexy smiles with you.” He nodded, like he was proud of the way he’d just dropped that announcement on everyone. He pulled his chair out and sat down, picking up his coffee cup. 

Jason cleared his throat and looked around the table. “We’re going to Seattle, so pack appropriately. Most of you will be inside most of the time, but there will probably be some good opportunities for some outside work in the rain… it’s been a while since we’ve had the chance to do something like that. There’s going to be some off time, too, so you’ll want to be prepared for the weather.” He very carefully avoided looking at Ryan when he mentioned off time, but he knew his lover would know exactly what he was thinking. On location filming always meant a little more time together, and he was looking forward to the escape. 

Chester swallowed hard as he stared at Jason. “In the rain?” he asked, and already he could feel his heart beating a little faster. “Like, during a storm? That’s dangerous, isn’t it?” He looked from Jason to Mark and back to Jason, hoping that maybe he’d misheard what was said. 

“It won’t be storms, Chaz. Seattle’s like, I don’t know. Dreary and rainy and such. I’m sure there will be storms while we’re there, but we’re not going to put any of you outside when it’s lightening. That would be irresponsible. But some sexy drizzle? That will be happening. And you two,” Jason pointed between Mike and Chester, “will absolutely be taking advantage of that. Stop worrying, you’ll have scripts in hand for the plane ride.” 

Chester sat back in his chair, staring down at his half-eaten burrito. “I don’t want to do sexy drizzle,” he mumbled, knowing neither of his bosses would be able to hear him. 

“That’s right,” Mark seconded. “Jason will be giving everyone scripts to look over for the plane ride. I know for some of you, this will be your first time going on location,” he said, motioning toward Mike and then over to Caleb and Noah, “so let me make this clear. You’re still on YRS time unless we tell you otherwise. Jason will be taking lots of footage - pictures and video - so that means keeping your smiles on and your excitement up.” 

Mike bit his bottom lip as the message was made clear - everything that happened on the trip was owned by YRS. There would be no private time. Mike and Chester didn’t exist in Seattle, just Charlie and Kenji. He’d have to remember that. They would have to be careful. He looked over at Chester, who still looked concerned about the rain and storms, and he reached over to squeeze his boyfriend’s thigh under the table. When Chester looked at him, he offered a reassuring smile.

“How long are we staying?” Ryan asked, and Devon nodded his head, like that was the same question he wanted to ask. 

“We leave Sunday morning and we’ll be back the following Saturday.” Mark looked up at Jason, who was only a few feet from him. “What time are we getting back Saturday?” 

“Flight lands at 4:30,” Jason answered, scanning over the itinerary on his clipboard. “And then you all will be off until the following weekend.”

Mark nodded before he looked back at his employees. “For those of you who are new, we’ll be sending cars around to pick you up and drop you off, so there’s no need to worry about that. We’ll all be arriving and leaving together. That’s how we do it.” He took another sip from his coffee cup before he asked, “Any other questions?” 

Mike looked over at Chester. He knew that anything else he wanted to know, Chester would have the answers. “I’m good,” he said, taking another bite of his burrito. 

“Me, too,” Devon offered and most of the table nodded in agreement. 

“Good,” Mark said as he stood up. “Now, as for today, Caleb and Devon, I want you two to go with Jason along with Noah. The three of you can go through some soft runs this morning, just to bring Noah up to speed a little bit on how things are done, and then the three of you can head home after that. Make sure to get your flight information from Jason,” he said, nodding toward his husband before his attention shifted. “Ryan and Amir, you can go with them and help with coaching a little, but we don’t have any scenes for you two this morning. But I want you guys to be useful, no jerking off,” he ordered a little sternly. “Just because it’s an unusual day, doesn’t mean you’re not still on my time.” 

Ryan glanced at Jason quickly before he looked back at his boss. “Sure, we can help out.” 

“I’m absolutely an expert at coaching,” Amir said, a smirk on his lips. “There’s nothing I enjoy more than being on the bossy side of the camera for a change.” Even though he knew it came out sarcastically, he really did like telling people what to do. It was easy enough to stand back and make comments. A lot easier than following directions sometimes. He figured he’d essentially be in charge anyway, with Ryan and Jason fawning all over each other. 

“I think we all know that,” Mark said, flashing Amir a look before he turned to Mike and Chester. “And you two, no scenes or coaching. I need to speak with both of you in my office as soon as you’re finished eating, and then you’ll be free to go after that.” 

Mike felt his stomach turn at Mark’s words. _Speak to us? Alone? What did we do now? Maybe he knows Ches wasn’t sick last weekend. Or he’s got some other plan for us in Seattle. Maybe it’s because Chester is afraid of storms. He probably picked Seattle on purpose, just to upset him. Jason doesn’t look like he knows what it’s about either. Oh my God, what if it’s about Jason and Ryan? What if he’s found out they’ve been to the loft?_ He tried to take a calming breath but he couldn’t stop the panicky feeling that had taken over when Mark said he needed to talk to them. 

Mark headed for the door. “I’ll be in my office,” he mumbled as he passed behind Mike and Chester’s chairs. He took another sip of coffee before he said, “Alright, everyone has their assignments for the day, hurry up and eat.” He didn’t bother to look back or to wait and see if anyone had any last minute questions. He knew Jason would stay behind and do that for him. 

Mike waited until he knew Mark was out of earshot, and turned right to Jason. “What’s this about?” he whispered, motioning between him and Chester.

“You really should just go in there and see,” Jason said, a tone of warning in his voice. “When Mark says he wants to talk to you privately, there’s a reason he’s not doing it out here.” 

Amir pushed his chair back and stood up. “Nervous, Mikey? Come on. If he hasn’t fired you yet, he’s not going to. And you heard him say they had scene work for you two in Seattle, so you know it’s not that. Unless…” he looked at Chester and then back at Mike. “Nah. You have a contract. I’m sure someone like Mark would never go back on the terms of a contract.” He didn’t wait for Mike to answer as he strolled out of the room. “I’ll be out back when you’re ready, Jay,” he called over his shoulder.

Mike was ready to launch into an inquisition about contracts and their deal with Mark, but Jason shut him down before he could ask anything about what Amir had hinted at. “Just go talk to Mark. There’s no use in you two sitting here worrying over it. Take your burrito if you want.” He motioned toward the unfinished food in front of both of them.

“Fine,” Mike grumbled, standing up and tugging at Chester’s sleeve. “Let’s go see what he wants so we can get out of here.” 

Chester looked over his unfinished food. He wasn’t hungry anymore. Going on location was usually fun. It was a change from the usual YRS same old environment and routine. But going to Seattle didn’t sound fun. _It storms in Seattle. All the time. Jason can say what he wants. . .sexy drizzle. I’m not doing that. I can’t._ He turned away from his food and coffee and stood up. _And now we have to go have a second meeting with Mark. That’s two morning meetings! I bet there’s something extra omen-ish about that._ He glanced toward the kitchen as he followed behind Mike to leave the dining room, but he couldn’t Brad anywhere, and that felt like just one more bad sign. 

With his unfinished burrito in one hand, Mike reached his other toward Chester’s. He laced their fingers together and sighed. “Whatever it is, we’re in it together, Ches.” His only answer came in the form of a slight nod, and they didn’t speak as they made their way across the house to Mark’s office. Mike held Chester’s hand tightly as he knocked on the closed door with the other.

From inside his office, Mark sat behind his desk. He had his coffee cup at reach, just to his left before he heard a knock on the door. He glanced up before he shouted, “Come in!” He watched as Mike and Chester entered the room, and he waved to them. “Come in, boys,” he told them, motioning to the two empty chairs in front of his desk. 

Mike lead the way, taking the chair directly across from Mark and sitting as tall as he could manage, his shoulders squared. He waited for Chester to sit down before he asked, “you wanted to see us?” 

Mark pursed his lips as he sat forward, spreading his hands out in front of him. “Just relax, fellas. You aren’t in any trouble.” He waited, watching as Chester visibly calmed, his shoulders slumping a little, even as Mike stayed propped high on the edge of his seat. Mark pushed the sleeves of his white dress shirt up, revealing his rather hairy arms before he laced his fingers together and rested them on his desk. “First of all, Chaz, it’s nice to see you looking better. I know last weekend was rough.” 

Chester looked from Mark over to Mike quickly before he nodded. “It was. I’m fine now though.” 

“And I’m very happy to see it. Now, as you both are aware, we did edit the video of the two of you taking advantage of my empty house last weekend, and through the magic of Jason’s fingers, we were able to actually get a good looking scene from it. Have either of you watched it?” he asked, one finger swinging back and forth between the two men. 

Mike dug his fingers into the armrests on both sides of the chair. “No.” He didn’t even look at Chester. “I got to hear all about it from Noah.” 

Mark’s face lifted to a grin. “I heard. He is quite the fan of the two of you. Chaz?” he asked, moving his attention to the other chair. “How about you?” 

Chester shook his head. “No, I haven’t.” 

“You should. It came out really well,” Mark offered before he folded his arms on the desk. “And even more importantly, the fans are loving it. They already liked the two of you, for the most part, but getting a chance to see such raw, real life versions of you, I have to say, it’s doing three times what we expected it would do.” He paused, waiting to see if either of his employees would have anything to add. 

“Well, I’m sure that makes _you_ happy,” Mike said, trying to keep the bitterness from his voice. “I’m not interested in watching it. I was there. I know what happened.” He paused and squinted his eyes in thought. “Why are you telling us this? You know Chester keeps an eye on the ratings and hits and stuff. He already knows it’s doing well.” He stole a quick glance at his boyfriend, who was also watching Mark’s face carefully.

Mark’s lips parted briefly. “Mike, just calm down,” he said, his voice staying at a soothing level he used for when he needed to sweet talk his way into or out of something. “I just wanted to make sure that you both knew how well it’s doing. And, you know it’s not like anything else we have on the site. Or that anyone has up right now. Sure, there are lots of fakes out there,” he admitted with a dismissive swipe of his hand through the air. “But the two of you are the real deal, and it shows. By God, it shows when you guys are doing scenes and it came shining through like fireworks during that piano room moment. And _that’s_ what people love,” he stated, thumping his fist on the desk. “They love that it’s _real_.” 

Chester nodded. “Jason’s told me that before,” he said with a bit of a shrug. “That you can’t hide things from the camera.” 

“And Jason is exactly right,” Mark argreed, pointing his finger at Chester. “Look, I brought you two in here because I wanted to run an idea by you. What would the two of you think about doing it again? Not the same thing,” he clarified quickly, waving his hand. “But doing a whole series of The Real Mike and Chester?” 

“No,” Mike said, immediately and flatly. There wasn’t going to be any discussion about this topic, he wasn’t interested. “We’re not doing that.” 

“Okay, just hear me out,” Mark said, both his palms up. “I know that this would be an intrusion into your personal lives, but don’t you see? _That’s_ what people will show up to see,” he stressed. “So here’s what I’m thinking. A series - a real life scene series which means there would be zero direction from me or Jason,” he explained. “We would put the two of you in a private room with cameras set up and then you would be free to do whatever you want. It would be like you were directing yourselves.” He waited, flashing his eyes back and forth between Mike and Chester, hoping to see at least a small bit of interest or curiosity from one of them. 

“You have to be kidding me,” Mike huffed, his arms crossing over his chest. “After all this, you _stealing_ our privacy, after everything that happened last weekend, you think we’re interested in this at all? There is _no way_ this is happening. None. It’s bad enough that we have to see out the length of our contracts, I’m not going to let you take the little bit of peace we have with each other. Come on, Chester. This conversation is over.” He went to stand up, reaching for Chester’s hand. 

“Okay, just wait,” Mark said, standing up and putting out his hand. “Mike, please, sit back down. Chaz?” he said, looking at the other man, meeting his familiar gaze. “Stay? Alright, you haven’t heard the rest.” He looked back at Mike before he motioned to the empty chair. “Mike, please. You’re going to be interested in the rest of this.” 

“I doubt it,” Mike answered snottily before Chester turned pleading eyes his direction. _Fuck. I promised I’d be calm and not let Mark or anyone else get to me, and I’m all worked up. And Chester wants me to behave. I should behave. But Mark is being unreasonable. There’s no way we’re doing this. None. I won’t agree._ He looked away from Chester and back at Mark, taking a deep breath. “I don’t think anything you can say will make me interested in this idea of yours.” 

Mark let out a sigh before he held up a pink file folder from his desk. “I don’t think you understand the magnitude of what we’re dealing with. Your video has been up a week and already we’ve been flooded with emails from people begging for more. We’ve had more people sign up for subscriptions this past week then we have in any other single week.” He let out a breath, still watching as Mike glared at him and Chester smiled a little. _There it is. I knew I could count on Chaz. I’ve trained him well._

“Now, in addition to the two of you having full creative control over your scenes, and the privacy to do them without me or Jason watching, I’m willing to renegotiate your contracts. I don’t have them in front of me,” he admitted, motioning over his desk. “But I’m sure you’ve both looked over them enough times to know what they say. If you boys do this, I’ll cut both your times in half.”

“In half?” Chester asked, sitting forward in his seat as he watched his boss nod. “Like. . .one year instead of the two I have left?” 

“That’s right. You do this for me and you’ll only have to do it for the next twelve months. One year, and you’ll both be totally free to leave. You can walk away from me,” he said, pressing a hand to his chest, “and YRS forever. No strings attached.” 

_One year. One, not two. And all we have to give up is our privacy._ Mike shook his head. “I don’t think so. Nothing is worth you being inside our lives like that. Right, Ches?” Suddenly he wasn’t sure what Chester was thinking. His eyes were huge and round as he stared at Mark.

“So, really just one more year?” Chester asked again. He could hardly believe it. He’d been waiting for so long for his time at YRS to be up - especially since he’d been with Mike - and now he had the opportunity to make that happen twice as fast. 

“That’s right, Chazzy,” Mark said. “We’ll plan out a schedule of weekends, and when those weekends are up, you’ll be free to go. But, almost all of those will need to be the real stuff. We can still film here, or we could do some of them at the loft, if you’d like. You both will have a lot of input on things like that.” 

Mike could feel Chester starting to lean toward Mark’s idea. “Ches,” he said quietly. “You’re really thinking about this, aren’t you? Come on, babe, you know this is a bad idea.” He tried to get Chester to look at him but he wasn’t having much success. 

“Chaz, Mike,” Mark interrupted, earning him a sharp glare from Mike’s dark eyes. “You don’t have to answer right now. This offer will remain on the table for the next few weeks as we watch how your first _real_ video continues to do. Just think it over. I’m offering you guys freedom within a year, and a raise,” he added in. “I know that giving up this much of your private lives is asking a lot, and I want to make sure you feel like you’re being compensated. There,” he said, sitting back in his chair, “that’s my offer. Think it over and let me know.” 

Mike stood up and pulled at Chester’s sleeve. “Let’s go home,” he said, not looking back at Mark. _This is how he gets what he wants. He always finds a way to get inside Chester’s head, sweeten the deal just enough to get him to agree. I’m not going to let him agree to this. It would ruin everything._ He tugged on Chester’s shirt again. “Come on, Ches.” 

Chester looked up, meeting Mike’s eyes before he looked back at Mark. “Okay,” he said, “we’ll think about it. Man, just one more year,” he repeated, still feeling a little overwhelmed at the thought as he stood up. 

“That’s all I’m asking,” Mark said as he watched them head for the door. “Oh, boys,” he called, and he watched as they both dutifully turned around. “Remember to go find Jason first and get all your travel information from him before you leave. And, Chaz,” he said, wiggling his finger through the air, pulling his employee a few steps back toward him. “I know you keep up with the comments, so you’ve probably seen the ones saying they miss seeing you and Ryan together.” He waited a second, leaning a little to the left to see Mike’s eyes double in size. “So we might have to have the two of you do some soft work, just to throw them something. Nothing big. We’ll keep it innocent.”

Chester turned, catching the look on Mike’s face before he nodded to Mark. “We’ll see. And yeah, I know what people are saying,” he admitted softly before he spun around and headed back toward the door to leave, taking Mike’s hand in his own as he did. 

The door to Mark’s office had barely shut behind them before Mike stopped dead in his tracks, yanking on Chester’s hand. “Soft work?” he hissed. “What the fuck does that mean? You’re not doing _anything_ with Ryan, do you hear me?” He was off the charts pissed, both topics of the morning meeting with Mark having completely blindsided him.

“Mike, calm down,” Chester said as he looked down the hallway, but he couldn’t see anyone. “Soft work is nothing. It’s flowery crap,” he explained. “It’s like promo day only with just two people. It will be me and Ry smiling at each other and acting lovey-dovey in front of the camera, but there’s no porn in it.” 

“No,” Mike insisted, pulling Chester close to him. “I don’t care if there’s no porn, I don’t want pictures of you and Ryan together out there. I… wait. You knew they were saying this? The fans?” He cocked his head to the side and looked at his boyfriend. “Why didn’t you tell me?” 

Chester crossed his arms. “Why would I tell you that? Mike, you flipped the last time those comments were brought up. And. . .well, there’s already tons of pictures out there of me and Ryan together.” He looked away, focusing on the white marble floor as he held his tongue from adding, _along with a lot of other guys._ He knew that would only make all this worse. “I’ll try and talk Mark out of it,” he said, looking back up at his boyfriend. “But if I have to, it really doesn’t mean anything. He said we’d keep it innocent and I’d make sure he’d keep his word on that.” 

“Yeah, right.” Mike closed his eyes in frustration. The whole thing sounded like something that was going to happen whether he wanted it to or not. “You’re not doing any photos without me in there to watch. I don’t trust him at all.” He hiked his thumb over his shoulder at the office, at Mark. “Where does he get these ideas anyway. And I can tell, you’re thinking about what he said about our contracts, and I’m telling you, we’re not doing that!” He started to walk down the hall toward the stairs. “Come on. We’re going home.” 

Chester went to argue, but didn’t. There was no way Mike would listen right now. He wouldn’t listen to reason or even be open to discussions, and Chester knew it. _He needs time. A year. We could be done with all this in just a year._ The idea brought a partial smile to his lips as he went to follow his boyfriend. “Wait, we gotta go find Jay first!” he hollered. 

Mike stopped with his foot on the bottom step. “I forgot. Text him, babe, find out where he’s at.” He looked down at the floor while he waited. _He says there’s tons of pictures out there of him and Ryan. I wonder how I’d find those. I wonder if I just google Charlie Bang if they come up. Surely not. They must be buried on the YRS site somewhere. I hope you can’t just google our porn names and get pictures._ The thought sent a shiver down his spine.

Chester jostled his phone from the pocket of his shorts and pulled up Jason’s name. His fingers zipped across the screen. “They’re probably either out back at the pool or up in one of the rooms,” he mumbled just as his phone dinged back. “Pool,” he stated, holding his phone up to flash Jason’s one word reply so Mike could see it. 

“Let’s go,” he said, turning back to cross the room again. All the thoughts about Chester and Ryan, and the thoughts about Mark’s proposal, were swirling around in his head. He knew Mark probably wouldn’t give up until he got them to agree to one or both ideas. “The sooner we get the info, the sooner we can just be alone. I just want to be alone.” He sighed. It felt like far too much of his life was out of his control at the moment.

“Fine,” Chester said as he let Mike take the lead, their hands no longer any kind of together. “Jason will just hand us some paperwork from his clipboard that has our flight information on it. It will take two seconds. In fact, you don’t even have to go,” he suggested quickly, reaching to pull on Mike’s arm. “I’ll do it. You can go up and grab our bags and I’ll meet you by the door or out at the car. There’s no reason for both of us to go do both things.” He could see Mike’s defiance getting ready to bust out, but Chester didn’t wait. He patted Mike’s shoulder quickly, and then sprinted ahead to get out to the pool as quickly as possible. 

Mike stood in the living room for a moment before turning on his heel and heading back for the stairs. _He’ll only be out of my sight for a minute. I’ll grab the bags and meet him out there. It will be fine._ He glanced down the hallway toward Mark’s office as he passed, making a face. _Maybe one year wouldn’t be so bad, if it gets us away from him. No. What am I thinking? That’s the kind of stuff that will only get us in trouble._ He shook his head and took the stairs two at a time. _I just want to get out of here for the weekend, take Chester home. I just want to go home._

****  
TBC


	38. Seattle Part One: The Lucky Spatula

Mike wiped the condensation from the bathroom mirror and wrapped the towel around his waist. He’d spent the better part of the afternoon convincing Chester that going to Seattle would be fine, that they would be inside most of the time, and that Jason had promised no outside work in the storms. It didn’t seem to matter what he said, though, Chester was determined to be upset over the whole idea of having sex in the rain. _I don’t know… I could see where that could look sexy._

He’d spent so much time soothing his boyfriend that he hadn’t had time to dwell on Mark’s last words from the morning, the whole idea that the fans missed seeing his boyfriend with Ryan. But after a quiet shower, alone, he couldn’t deny the insecurity that had gripped him earlier in the day was back once he’d had time to think. He looked at himself in the mirror, his eyes going over his ears that stuck out a little too far, his blue tipped black hair, his slightly chubby cheekbones, then back to staring into his plain brown eyes that were just a little too big in his face, a little too round to hint at Japanese heritage. _Of course they miss Ryan. He’s all angles and sleek muscles, with a flat stomach and those blue eyes. Of course they’d rather see him than me. I’m not a porn star. I never wanted to be. I’m just a regular guy who happens to be in love with a porn star. A regular guy with regular eyes and a regular stomach and regular arms. What does Chester even see in me? He could be with anyone._

With a sigh, Mike leaned closer to the mirror, running his hand down his chest and pinching at his skin, looking for flaws. _I wonder what they looked like together. I wonder if they looked better than us._ Mike paused, his eyes skipping in the mirror to the closed door behind him. _I could look. I could look them up. I wouldn’t watch any videos. I think it would make me sick to see any of Chester’s videos. But especially videos with Ryan. Why did he have to be with Ryan? Of all the people at YRS, why did he have to be with the best looking one?_

Frustrated, Mike grabbed the towel from his hips and threw it in the hamper, then pulled on his gray underwear, black and red plaid pajama bottoms, and white t-shirt in quick succession. He knew none of it matched but he couldn’t bring himself to care. The only thing on his mind was Ryan. _It’s always something with him. Touching Ches. Texting Ches. Drinking with Ches. I can’t get away from him. And fucking Mark, it’s like he knows how I feel about Ryan. Why else would he say that to Chester with me there? Does he think that’s going to make me want to do this series he’s talking about? Like if he mentions side work with Ryan, I’ll give in and agree, like I have something to prove?_ Mike’s shoulders slumped. _Maybe I do. Everyone wanted to see Chester fuck me, and now they’ve got it. What else do they need to take from us?_

It was the first time he’d thought of any of his scenes with Chester as _fucking_ and it made Mike’s stomach turn, especially in context of the video he’d been thinking about. _He wasn’t fucking me. That was us. That was love. That was different from anything he’s ever done with Ryan. Right? Right? Like he says, everything with Ryan was all for work. No feelings. But… then why do the fans miss seeing Ches and Ryan together? What did they have together that we don’t?_

He opened the door to the bathroom, the cooler air hitting his face as he walked toward the kitchen for a glass of water. Chester was nowhere to be seen. _He’s probably upstairs picking out socks or something._ A brief smile crossed his face as he filled a glass with water, listening to Chester’s footsteps overhead.

Upstairs in the bedroom, Chester had everything he needed - black and white checkered underwear, which mimicked his shirt perfectly. He had one black sock and one white, which were a pair, both with the opposite color stitching over the toes and around the ankles. “And black pajama pants to top it off.” 

With his clothes slung over his arm, he headed down the steps, humming the random tune he recalled from the other day that Mike had been playing on the keyboard. “Oh good, you’re out,” he said, the moment he stepped into the living room. “I’m going to jump in the shower, then we’ll both be clean and ready to do whatever we want.” 

“I’ll be waiting for you,” Mike promised, flashing a quick smile as he picked his phone up from the bar. “Let’s both come up with something fun to do and we’ll pick one for tonight, and save the other for tomorrow.”

Mike’s words stopped Chester in his rush to the bathroom. One eyebrow lifted in thought. _Something fun. . .we should do something fun. Seattle will be a nightmare, so we need to have all the fun tonight. And tomorrow._ “I can do that,” he agreed before he stepped into the bathroom, and closed the door behind him. 

Mike settled down on the couch, tucking his legs up underneath him, his phone in one hand as he glanced toward the bathroom door. _Something fun… I’ll worry about that in a minute. He’s always in the shower forever anyway._ The desire to see what all the fuss over Ryan and Chester was about took priority over everything else. _I’ll just pull up their promo pictures. I won’t look at the comments. I just want to see them. I just want to see what everyone else sees._ He bit down on his bottom lip and closed his eyes. _I can just google them. Charlie Bang and Chris Suckler. I’ll just look at what comes up, and no clicking. No reading. Just looking._

He took a deep breath and opened the internet browser on his iPhone, feeling guilty as he typed in _Charlie Bang Chris Suckler_ and waited. 

The very first picture that popped up stole Mike’s breath away. Ryan was behind Chester, his chin on Chester’s bare shoulder. His boyfriend was shirtless, and Ryan’s arms were snaked around Chester from behind, meeting just below the view of the camera, one hand under the waistband of his underwear and the other on top, obviously resting on Chester’s crotch. Chester’s eyes were closed as he leaned his head on Ryan’s shoulder, his lips parted in a silent sigh, and Ryan was looking right into the camera, his blue eyes sparking with desire as he smirked possessively. The intimate pose almost stopped Mike from flicking to the next picture, but once he’d seen the first, it was as though the floodgates had opened. With his thumb he swiped left, pulling up picture after picture, some suggestive, some playful, some too realistic for Mike’s taste.

He lingered for a long minute over one particular picture of Chester on his knees, looking up at Ryan as he reached for the button of his jeans, Ryan’s hand cupping his cheek on the side away from the camera. It was almost the exact same pose he and Chester had been reprimanded for in Mike’s first shoot for being too familiar. Too tender. 

Mike felt the jealousy bubbling up in his veins as he looked at Chester’s submissive pose, his hair not the spiked red mohawk he’d grown accustomed to seeing at YRS, but a strip of dark hair flattened over his forehead that made him look even younger than he clearly was in the photo. And the way Ryan was looking down at him… 

He swallowed hard and looked toward the bathroom door. The shower was still running. _That looks like more than work to me. Can you fake that kind of intimacy? Is it possible to turn that on for the camera?_ He squeezed his eyes shut for a moment and tried to take a few breaths. _I shouldn’t have looked. Just like the comments on our video, I shouldn’t have looked. I didn’t need to see this. I didn’t need to see that Chester’s fans prefer them together, that it looked like they were in love. That’s what this is all about. They miss them together because they thought Ches and Ryan were in love. How stupid, isn’t that what Ches always says? It’s work. It’s porn. It’s not love. But Mark says love is what’s selling, that the real relationship between me and Chester is what people want to see. I’m so confused. Do they want Ryan back for the fucking? Or do they want more of me and Chester? Not Charlie and Kenji, but us? And how did Mark know this would all play right into his plans? God, I fucking hate him._

Mike wanted to throw his phone. He wanted to cry - big ugly sobs of anger and frustration. He wanted to barge into the bathroom and shove the photo in Chester’s face and demand answers. But he didn’t do any of those things. He unlocked his phone, quietly deleted his browsing history, and then turned it off. His eyes skipped over the downstairs of the loft as he waited first for the shower to turn off, then for Chester to emerge from the bathroom. 

As soon as his boyfriend stepped out into the living space, Mike was on him, his hands on Chester’s hips, fusing their lips together. _You’re mine. Not Ryan’s, not Mark’s, not anyone who came before me. You’re mine, Ches, and I need you right now._ He let every ounce of insecurity, every twisted emotion he was feeling bleed into the way he kissed Chester, not letting him come up for air as he tightened his hold on his boyfriend. 

The force of Mike’s lips, and the way his hands were latched onto Chester’s t-shirt sent sparks through the older man’s body. He could feel his lover’s need. His passion. And already in just the few seconds that their bodies had been welded together, he could feel Mike’s dick getting hard. “Sexy Boy,” Chester crooned with a pant as he practically had to force his way out of the kiss. “What’s this all about all the sudden? Or is this your half of the fun ideas?” 

Mike blinked at Chester’s words. He didn’t want to start a fight, which was the exact reason he’d cleared the history on his phone. He didn’t want to bring up Ryan, or the pictures, or what Mark had said earlier. He wanted all of that out of his head. “I just want work, YRS, everyone there, I want it out of my head. I want to take you upstairs and make you forget about the storms in Seattle. Maybe this _is_ my idea. Me and you, _just me and you._ Let’s go forget about everything else.” 

There was an urgency in Mike’s voice, and Chester knew that his boyfriend was on some sort of edge. _An edge he needs to back away from._ “In real life,” Chester said, his eyes drifting from Mike’s eager face, up to the lofted bedroom, “it’s always just me and you.” 

“Do you swear it?” Mike asked, catching one of Chester’s hands and pressing it to his lips. “That’s all I want, Chester, all I’ve been wanting, is for it to be me and you. I know I overreact sometimes, and I worry, but… I can’t imagine not being with you. I want it to always be me and you.” Inside, Mike’s stomach was in knots. He knew he sounded a little crazy but those pictures were stuck in his head. He needed Chester to make them go away, without telling him that’s what this whole thing was about. 

Chester’s eyes squint in thought. “Of course I swear it. Mike, you’re the only one I love. Love,” he stated again as he motioned between them. “And only you and me exist when it comes to that.” He waited, hoping the message would get through. It was a conversation they’d had more than once, but it never seemed to be enough. Days, weeks, or sometimes months would go by, but then Mike would have a moment of doubt. His worries would bubble to the surface and Chester wasn’t always sure how to traverse them. 

Mike squeezed Chester’s hand and tugged him a few steps toward the stairs. “Come show me,” he said, his pulse starting to calm a little from the anxiety he’d been gripped with. “Come upstairs and show me that it’s just us. I need you.” Lying side by side, kissing his lover, touching him the way he hoped he knew better than anyone else - it was the only thing that would soothe his heart now, and he knew that Chester wouldn’t say no. 

Chester nodded, but kept his words to himself. He led the way, taking Mike to the stairs and then up to the bedroom. He knew there were two options. He could either push Mike onto the bed, strip him naked and the two of them could go at it like animals - which was always a good time in Chester’s book. Or, they could lay down together and spend the rest of the day kissing and touching each others skin like it was precious. 

Chester scratched his head as he thought about Mike’s rushed kisses from downstairs, from only a few minutes ago. Chester slipped his free hand down over his crotch, feeling his own dick ache just a little as he thought about it. If that had continued, Mike would have had him on the kitchen table, pounding into him and ravishing every bit of his body. 

But that wasn’t how it had gone, and Chester knew there was a reason it didn’t. “How about we take these off,” he suggested as he tugged at the front of Mike’s shirt. “I know you don’t always think so, but I love seeing you with your shirt off. I. . .I love your dark nipples. I love having the freedom to see what I’m touching when you let me pet over your chest.” He slid a finger down Mike’s shirt front, stopping at his navel. “And your stomach,” he whispered. 

Mike closed his eyes. “I still hate having my shirt off, even after all this time. Even though it’s just you.” He pushed away his thoughts from earlier in the bathroom, the differences in his body and Ryan’s. “But I love it when you touch me. And kiss me,” he whispered as he went to raise his arms. “You can take it off if you want to.” 

Chester quickly pulled his own shirt off, tossing the checkered piece to the floor before he took a step closer. He could smell the clean scent coming from his own body, and from Mike’s. It was a mix of their shampoos, of coconut and peaches, and the marrying of their shared soap. Chester’s eyes slid closed for a second as he took Mike’s waist in both hands. His fingers found the hem of his t-shirt, and in one smooth motion, he pulled it up and over Mike’s head. He let the garment drop to their feet, his arms wrapping around Mike’s exposed sides as he leaned in and kissed his boyfriend’s neck. He left a damp kiss high up by his ear, his nose just barely nuzzling against Mike’s gold hoop earring, before he dropped another one on the crook of his neck and then his shoulder. 

A shiver ran through Mike’s body as he felt Chester’s lips on his skin. He ran his fingers down Chester’s warm back, pulling his nails light along the waistband of his pajama pants before pulling him close. “I love you, more than anything,” he whispered as Chester left a trail of kisses across his collarbone. He nuzzled his face down into the top of Chester’s hair and felt the slight dampness from the shower as he placed a few kisses there. “Let’s lay down, I want to feel you on top of me. I kinda miss making out like that.” He smiled as he thought about the early days of their relationship, when Chester was all gas and no brake, and he’d been scared to death of what was happening between them. They’d come a long way. He had to get past the other things and believe that Chester wanted to be with him. 

“You’re the boss, Sexy Boy,” Chester said, a smile filling his face, before he kissed Mike again. He made his way up the other side of his boyfriend’s neck, taking his time to evenly space out his kisses, to give Mike’s right shoulder every bit as much care as he gave the right side of Mike’s neck, even though the neck was more fun. “Hmmmm,” he half moaned. “I want you in your underwear,” he decided as his mind suddenly rushed forward with plans. 

He leaned back, meeting Mike’s eyes for only a second before he dropped to his knees, gently. He reached up, hooking his fingers over the waistband of Mike’s pajama pants. “Just these,” he said in a somewhat form of a question. He wanted to get Mike’s sign of approval before he actually pulled them down and off his boyfriend’s hips. 

“As long as yours are next,” Mike said, running his index finger down Chester’s nose to his lips. “I wouldn’t want you to be over dressed.” Despite his lingering insecurities, he was feeling the tingle of anticipation in his limbs just from the way Chester was looking at him. There was nothing quite like the look in Chester’s eyes when he was kneeling on the floor in front of him. 

Chester slid his tongue over his lip ring before he dropped his head and eyes to watch what he was doing. He pulled on the pajama bottoms, and after a little maneuvering to get each of Mike’s legs free, he tossed them away with their other discarded clothes. “I love it when you wear gray underwear,” he mumbled as he slid both hands up Mike’s legs, letting his fingers enjoy the feel of each hair, muscle, and shape that was there. “I like to see you get wet,” Chester admitted as he pressed his nose and lips to Mike’s crotch, being careful to keep his mouth shut. He wanted to watch Mike’s erection grow. He wanted to see it form behind the gray shroud that was light enough in color that when pre-cum made an appearance, Chester would be able to see it. 

Mike let his head fall back, his hands going to Chester’s face and hair. His words were honestly intimate and something peaceful settled over Mike’s thoughts. Chester’s lips, his face against his half-hard cock felt perfect. He wanted to savor every second of their connection. “You spoil me sometimes,” he said, tracing Chester’s earlobe with his fingers. “I hope I do the same for you. I love it when you get on your knees for me.” The honesty was flowing both ways, and Mike wiggled his hips just a little bit, suggesting just a little bit more. Chester was so good at blow jobs, and Mike wasn’t ashamed to make his desire known. 

Mike’s movements sent Chester’s nose and lips to other parts of his boyfriend’s hidden cock. He glanced up, catching Mike’s eyes but only for a second before he went back to work. He made sure to do it all in order, to rub his face down low, grazing Mike’s ballsack and then to move counterclockwise, up and over around before dropping back down on the other side. It was a recipe to touch everything in its turn, and each pass he made, he felt Mike’s length get a little harder. He let his lips part slightly, pushing his hot breath onto Mike’s underwear, right over where he knew his lover’s soft head was before he pulled back, and he wasn’t disappointed. There was a small dark spot on the gray fabric, and Chester smiled in satisfaction. 

“Want to try something different?” he asked as he leaned back a little more and looked up. 

“Whatever you have in mind, that’s what I want.” Mike’s legs felt a little shaky and he looked down to catch Chester’s eyes again. They were dark, glittering with anticipation, and all thoughts of his body, of Ryan, of his boyfriend being anywhere but with him were absolutely gone in the moment. “Tell me what you want me to do,” he said, running his hand over the top of Chester’s head and lightly messing up his hair. 

Chester leaned his head back, enough to kiss Mike’s hand. “We need to rearrange a little.” He kissed his boyfriend’s palm one more time before he stood himself up. His knees ached a little from the hard floor, but he was going to fix that. He took a moment and stretched, first his arms and then his back. “Sex is a workout. Gotta do your stretches,” he said with a smile before he poked one finger at Mike’s naked side. “You better stretch your legs.”

“What?” Mike half smiled, trying to decide if Chester was being serious. “You know I don’t know all those fancy stretches you learned in karate. You’ve tried to teach me, but…” He flung his hands out helplessly to the side. “You’re joking, right?” 

Chester’s face was already lit up with laughter as he scooted around Mike to get to the bed. “No, I’m serious, but you can skip it.” He reached out to feather his fingers down Mike’s chest before he grabbed a pillow from the bed. “You’ll be fine. I think,” he said with a daring tone in his voice, just to see Mike’s jaw drop a little more. “Come on, Sexy Boy, you’re in the way.” With the pillow under his arm, he shooed Mike back away from the bed a few steps. “Stand over there for a minute.” 

With an impatient huff, Mike stood over by the dresser and tried to figure out what was happening. A few minutes ago, Chester had been teasing his mouth over the top of his underwear, but now he was talking about stretches and Mike felt his erection fade just a little. Blow jobs and stretching didn’t go together in his book. “Ches,” he whined, turning on his best puppy dog eyes, “hurry up.”

“You’re so impatient,” Chester chuckled as he tossed the pillow to the floor, right by the side of the bed. He got down, pressing his knees into it before he leaned forward, placing his hands on the floor. He stretched his back for a moment, bending down and then arching his back as he pushed himself up before he wiggled his butt. He looked over his shoulder at the bed, and the distance, and then he pushed himself back, giving him little to no room between his back and the mattress, his legs and feet hidden from sight underneath it. “Okay,” he said, waving a hand to his lover. “Pull those underwear off and come over here.” He wet his lips, swiping his tongue back and forth over his piercing. 

Mike watched Chester’s tongue as he wasted no time getting naked and stepping back over to the bed. He reached for Chester’s hand and laced their fingers together, giving his boyfriend an impatient tug. “Right here?” he breathed, stopping a few inches from where Chester’s mouth was waiting, lips slick with saliva.

Chester squeezed Mike’s hand. “No,” he said. “Back up just a little. . .and take your socks off.” 

“Socks…” Mike reached down and pulled them off, tossing them carelessly to the side. “Anything else I can do for you?” he asked with a hint of teasing in his voice. 

Chester reached both arms out. “Don’t move,” he said quickly, knowing his boyfriend would want to automatically walk right into him. “Just making sure we’re right.” He touched Mike’s knees before he looked behind him again. “Okay, I think we’re good.” He looked up, letting a smile caress his face. “Ready for fun, Sexy Boy?” He didn’t wait for Mike to answer before he ran both hands up Mike’s bare legs. He massaged his thighs for a moment before moving onto Mike’s partial erection. His lover wasn’t as hard as he had been a few minutes ago, but Chester knew that wouldn’t last long.

He ran his fingers over Mike’s shaft and then to his head, taking special care to rub it along the bottom, and over his sensitive slit. He tweezed Mike’s cock between just two fingers, and then right over his mushroom head, pulling on the base as he watched it grow. As the half-limp member came to life and lifted. Chester licked his lips again, even though he wasn’t quite close enough to get Mike into his mouth. 

Mike didn’t know what to do with his hands, and his fingers twitched as they hung as his sides and he watched Chester touch him. _I love him. I love his hands on me. I love his mouth on me. God, when is he going to put his mouth on me?_ “Chester,” he whimpered, feeling a little helpless. “Come closer.”

“I’m staying here, you come closer,” Chester said, before he raised one hand up and over his head. “Lean forward over me, and put your hands on the bed,” he instructed. “If I’ve got us lined up right, you’ll love it.” 

Taking two small steps forward, Mike hesitated. “On the bed? Okay… I think I can do that.” He looked down at Chester before he judged the distance to the bed and leaned over, making contact with the edge of the mattress and held on tightly. “Like this?”

“You got it,” Chester called from under him. “Grip your toes into the floor,” he suggested, before he went to work. Now Mike’s hard cock was hanging down, free from the rest of his body. There was room between his legs, between his scrotum and his shaft. Chester scooted out just slightly to get his angle, but it didn’t take much. He lifted his chin, and stuck his tongue out, licking it over Mike’s head. He started with licks, but quickly moved to pecks and short sucks as he lavished attention all over Mike’s private area. He kept his hands on his boyfriend’s legs, running them up, down, and around to Mike’s ass as he went. He made sure to get every inch of his lover’s piece wet before he worked up a bit more saliva and opened his mouth, casing himself over Mike’s hard erection. He took just the head first, but then more than half of it in his mouth before pulling back and doing it again, making sure to rub his lip ring up against the bottom of Mike’s shaft and head. 

Mike dug his fingers into the edge of the bed and planted his feet firmly to keep his balance. “God, Ches,” he moaned, “you feel so good.” He could feel every movement of the metal ring through Chester’s bottom lip, and every time he almost pulled off his dick, Mike wanted to groan in frustration. But Chester never made him wait long to feel the warm inside of his mouth again, his tongue pressing against him and than lapping at his head. As usual, his boyfriend was right; he was enjoying this quite a lot, even if he could feel the pull in the back of his legs as he leaned over. 

Chester took more of Mike’s cock into his mouth, his nose nuzzling into Mike’s dark pubic hair. He had his arms around Mike’s upper thighs, his fingers pulling at Mike’s ass cheeks. His fingers tugged and gripped as they blindly searched for what they wanted. Chester’s eyes were closed, his mind somewhere between his deep desire to bring his boyfriend to absolute pleasure, and keeping everything at a pace he could keep up with. He knew the position wasn’t the most comfortable, but he also knew the angle would bring a different sensation for both of them. He let go of Mike’s ass, his hands traveling out to his hips as he clutched him, his mouth sliding back and forth with more speed, Mike’s precum already coating Chester’s tongue. 

Mike’s eyes were closed, his head hanging forward as he held on tight. He felt Chester’s hands on his hips, holding him steady, and his legs were shaking as he felt the tension begin to coil in his stomach. He wanted to touch his boyfriend’s hair but he was afraid to lose his balance, and so he settled for opening his eyes to watch. The upside down sight of the back of Chester’s head was different from what he was used to seeing, and he felt a little disoriented. The only thing that he knew was Chester’s mouth was as familiar as it always was, no matter what position he found himself in. He squeezed his eyes shut and concentrated on his boyfriend’s skilled movements, and before long he found himself more or less on his tiptoes, his weight almost completely leaning into the mattress. “Fuck, Ches, just a little more,” he panted. 

From under his lover, Chester heard the instructions. A little more was never too much to ask for. Chester slid his hands back around to Mike’s ass, squeezing both his cheeks before he pulled Mike into him, sending his boyfriend’s cock a little deeper down his throat. His eyes were shut as he pulled back just a little and then did it again, pulling on Mike’s backside in a sort of reverse bucking motion. 

That extra bit was all it took, and Mike couldn’t hold back his orgasm even if he’d wanted to. With Chester’s hands gripping him tightly, he felt it coming, the rush from his balls up his shaft and out into Chester’s waiting mouth. His hips pushed against Chester’s hands as he released, his mouth dropping open and a low groan escaping his throat while his boyfriend swallowed every drop of cum he had to offer. In that moment, his legs didn’t ache and his toes didn’t hurt, all he could feel was Chester’s warm mouth, his tongue, his piercing against his sensitive cock as he came. 

Chester slowly pulled off Mike’s spent cock, and he took an immediate swallow. The moment his boyfriend’s semen was down and gone, Chester’s mouth dropped open as he breathed. His hands were still latched to Mike’s ass and hip, like he was frozen. He opened his eyes, seeing Mike’s spread legs and naked feet and he smiled softly. “Let me up,” he called, dropping his hands away. 

“Oh, God,” Mike moaned, trying to shift his weight from his arms and get his footing. “I’ve never felt so… good and hurt, all at the same time.” He pushed against the bed and stood up, his hand instantly going to his back. “You were right. I should have stretched. But… damn.” He centered his weight over his feet and extended his hand for Chester to take so he could pull him up. “Where’d you get an idea like that?” 

Chester shook his head. “Doesn’t matter,” he dismissed before he leaned forward and popped a quick kiss to Mike’s cheek. “Lay down,” he said, his eyes jumping to the bed and then back to Mike’s face. “ _That_ will really make you feel good,” he chuckled playfully. He took a step back to give Mike room as he twisted a little, stretching his back muscles and picking the pillow up from the floor. 

Mike instantly flopped down on his side of the bed, lifting his arms over his head and stretching his fingers toward the wall and his toes toward the bottom of the bed, his back arching a little as he moved. “Ah, yeah, that feels better. You need to join me, though. Everything is better with you.” He smiled as he rolled his head on the pillow toward Chester. 

Chester tossed the used pillow back in its place before he crawled on the bed, and snuggled himself up to his boyfriend’s side. He laid an arm across Mike’s naked stomach, his eyes drifting closed. “I like this,” he mumbled, soaking in Mike’s familiar body heat and shape. 

Sleepiness was already threatening to take over as Mike fumbled around for the blanket to pull over them both. “Me, too,” he whispered, his eyes heavy. “This is just what I needed, you right here with me.” He covered them as much as he could with the blanket, then ran his hand over Chester’s arm. “I love you… that was fantastic.”

Chester smiled with his eyes closed. “I’m glad you enjoyed it.” He let out a long sigh as his body started to sink with weight. His own erection was long gone, his mind already moved on to other things. It was time to rest, and let the stresses of the day go. “Mike?” 

“Hmmm?” Mike was already half asleep when he heard Chester’s voice. “What is it, babe?”

“I love you, too,” Chester answered. “And we need to go shopping tomorrow. We need some badass raincoats before we’re dragged to Seattle.” 

“Anything you want, Ches. I’ll buy you anything,” Mike mumbled, his mind far off and almost gone for the night. 

Chester’s eyes opened at the sound of his lover’s familiar here-but-not-here voice. He knew Mike was gone. He could ask for a pet elephant right about now, and Mike would agree to it. _We both need to sleep. There’s so much to do tomorrow before we leave. A whole week. We’re going to be gone for a whole week. Raincoats and those rubber boots and umbrellas. What do you wear in a city where it rains all the time? Flannels. Oh God. That’s what people in Seattle wear. Mike’s going to be in flannel heaven. He’ll finally be with his people. A flannel clan. Fuck that. Sweaters. I’m going to take sweaters. Long ass, oversized sweaters._

Chester’s lips vibrated slightly as he let out a long exhale. _Whatever was wrong earlier, I hope he feels better now. He really needs to not doubt us so much. Maybe one day he’ll realize just how strong we are._

****

Ryan looked at his phone. It was almost ten a.m., but he yawned anyway. He’d been up since seven o’clock that morning, packing and getting ready to be picked up by the YRS caravan. They’d been sitting at the airport now for the last twenty minutes, and already he’d had enough. He was ready to be in Seattle and get to the next thing. Sitting around and watching strangers and his coworkers meander around the gate area wasn’t any fun. 

He let out a groan as he leaned back against the dark blue seat. He was sitting at the end of a long row of exact copies of the one he was in, which was always a little disorienting. His eyes flashed up, catching sight of Mike and Chester, who were sitting across the aisle. _He used to sit with me on these flights. Normally he’d be right here next to me and we’d be bullshitting the whole time, which is always fun with Chaz._ Ryan smiled for a second, his gaze drifting up and down Chester’s familiar pose - he was sitting on the very edge of his seat, one hand on his knee, which was bouncing up and down, and his other securely holding his yellow backpack. _He never buys a new one. He’s carried that same yellow backpack on every trip we’ve ever taken._

Amir walked by, interrupting Ryan’s concentration, and his attention shifted to Mike as Amir sat down three seats away. _Mike. He’s too protective of Chaz. He pets on him constantly. Won’t let him out of his sight. . .even here, when there’s tons of people around._ He waited a moment, allowing his gaze to linger over the couple before he turned his chin and stretched his neck. 

Jason and Mark were a few seats away, both of them heavy in debate and conversation of plans for the week they were going to be in Seattle. It was hard to see Jason, since he was on the other side of Mark, and Ryan leaned a little to the right to try and at least get one tiny second of eye contact with his lover, but as Jason flipped through a stack of scripts, preparing to pass them out, Ryan gave up. 

_I want that,_ He thought as he looked back over at Mike and Chester. _I just want to be a couple. I real couple._ He shook his head and pulled his phone back out, flipping through his music account to try and find something that would be distracting. He would be sitting with Devon and Caleb on the flight, which meant there wouldn’t be anyone he would want to talk to. 

Mike looked up as Jason stood up a few seats over. “I guess we’re about to get a script,” he whispered in Chester’s ear, letting his hand caress over the shoulder he’d been rubbing since they sat down. “I should write us a script,” he joked softly, nuzzling his nose along the curve of his boyfriend’s earlobe. “We’d be going to… hmmm… where would I take you? Some place warm. Where it never rains.” He thought it over for a moment, then looked back toward Jason. “Whatever this says, Ches, just remember, I’m gonna be with you. And a little bit of rain won’t be the end of the world. Promise.” 

He thought about the shopping spree they’d been on the day before, Chester snatching up anything and everything he could think of to protect him from the rain. Umbrellas. Rain boots. Raincoats. Several new pairs of socks, though that didn’t make any sense to Mike. It didn’t matter. Anything to calm his boyfriend down was a welcome purchase. Mike had watched him fuss over sweaters and turn down his suggestion to just wear some of his flannels while they were away. When it was all said and done, they’d ended up with not one but two checked bags full of rain gear and warm clothes. 

Chester’s leg was now bouncing twice as fast as he zeroed in on Jason, Mike’s words in the background. “I’m hoping he’s changed his mind. Or maybe we’ll get lucky and it will be the driest week Seattle has ever seen.” He could feel his heart pounding a little as Jason stood in front of Devon, Caleb, and Noah, handing them each a script and pointing at them. _He’s giving them instructions already. A brief. God. I don’t even want to know what ours says. Mike and Chester fuck in the mud and then drown when a sudden storm comes out of nowhere._ His eyes narrowed at the dark thought before he shook it away. Jason would never have them fuck in the mud. It would be too messy and look bad on camera. Mud worked for girls, not for guys on guys. 

“Chaz, Mike, here’s your scripts to look over on the plane. You two are up first when we get to Seattle, so make some time on the flight to get familiar with it. I can answer questions when we land - I’ll be with Mark up front.” Jason glanced over his shoulder quickly, but Mark was occupied with his phone. “You two are gonna have a scene - or two - every day… I’m sorry,” he apologized softly. He knew Mark had asked Mike and Chester to consider going for the realistic angle instead of his scripts, and in the absence of an agreement, his husband would probably make things as difficult as possible.

“Two a day?” Chester asked, clutching the script Jason had just handed him. “Two different scenes a day? But, but why?” He looked over at Mike, and then quickly around the seating area, his eyes skipping from face to face to face before he looked back up at his boss. “We’ll never be able to keep up with that.” 

“I think he’s trying to make a point,” Jason said, his voice low. “But it’s not every day. I think it’s just twice. Still… I know that’s not going to be good. But you know how he gets ideas, Chaz.” 

Mike tried to keep from glaring in Mark’s direction. “I see the point he’s trying to make, and it doesn’t change anything.” He looked down at the script, all of the sweet, playful feelings from moments earlier disappearing. “We’ll read it,” he said, dismissing Jason.

Chester watched as Jason turned away from them, and to Ryan and Amir. He kept his eyes forward, while Jason handed scripts to the two of them. He knew he was staring but he didn’t care. He wasn’t really watching anyway. The three of them just happened to be in his line of vision. _He’s trying to prove a point. What could he be trying to prove by working us to death? It’s going to suck. We’ll be tired and worn out and we’ll screw up the lines. Or not be able to perform and then he’ll shove pills down our throats. I don’t want that. Mike would flip._ He finally looked down, glancing quickly over the first few pages, and his stomach turned the moment he saw the words ‘outside deck’. 

“Not now, Ches,” Mike whispered. “We’ll look it over on the plane. We’ll have lots of time.” He looked down at the page Chester had opened to and frowned. “You’re just gonna worry the whole time.” He leaned over and pressed a quick kiss to Chester’s cheek, trying to distract him.

Chester rubbed a hand over his face before he dug his phone from his pocket. “What’s the weather in Seattle?” he mumbled as he pulled up the app on his phone, and typed in the city where they would be trapped for the next week. “Fuck,” he hissed the moment he saw the forecast. “Sexy Boy, look,” he whined as he flashed his phone at Mike. “There’s little storm clouds on every single day we’re there! The only day with a little sunshine is the day we leave.” He slumped forward, defeated. 

Mike slid his hand down Chester’s back, trying to soothe him. “Babe, those forecasts are hardly ever right. I bet those little storm clouds won’t hang around all week. There’s no way it’s going to rain the _whole_ time. Even if it rains every day, it won’t rain _all_ day. It’s going to be fine.” Mike bit his bottom lip, completely uncertain about the weather, the scripts, the two-a-days they were looking at. _We both can’t lose it at the same time. I just have to keep thinking it will be okay. I have to keep telling him that._

Ryan rolled his script up as the boarding order was being announced. He flung his backpack over his shoulder and stood up. “Chazzy, it’s going to suck not getting to sit together this time,” he whined as he watched Chester stand up across from him. “I think this is the first time we haven’t spent these trips together.” It was a reflex to flash Mike a glance before he looked back at Chester. “I have to sit with them,” he said, pointing his script toward Devon and the others. “And I have to room with Amir,” he stated next, tossing his new scene partner and Seattle roommate a cutesie smile.

“I know, it sucks,” Chester said before he looked over at Mike. “Not suck,” he corrected, lightly tugging on Mike’s dark blue jacket. “But, you know, Ry and I always bunk together and. . .” He stopped. He could already see the look on his boyfriend’s face and how he wasn’t picking the best words. “It’s just different,” he whispered to Mike before he leaned forward and kissed his cheek. “I’m glad you’re going to be there with me.” He tugged on his lover’s jacket one more time before turning his attention back to his coworker. “Sorry, Ry, but you can’t get me to give up Sexy Boy.” 

Mike flashed a tight lipped smile in Ryan’s direction before he grabbed his gray bag and shoved his script inside. “I’m sure we’ll all be spending plenty of time with each other,” he offered as he took Chester’s hand, weaving their fingers together. “Come on. You got your boarding pass?” 

Chester dug into the front pocket of his jeans, pulling out the crumbled piece of paper. “I got it,” he said without looking up. “I hope the plane’s not crowded.” He looked around the gate area, trying to mentally judge how many passengers there were going to be, as everyone who would be sitting in first class started to line up, which included Jason and Mark. _Lucky bums_. He let out a short sigh as he went to say something to Mike right when he heard:

“Stop the plane!!” Brad dashed between the seats, trying to get to his cousin. “The plane, stop the plane!” he gasped, just as Mark turned around. 

“Brad,” he hissed, his face going into glare-mode. “What the hell are you doing?”

The chef stood in front of him, half bent over as he huffed and puffed. His curly hair was sticking out everywhere, like he’d just ran ten miles in a wind storm, even though he’d been quietly sitting at the gate along with everyone else only moments ago. “There’s a door,” he said between labored breaths. “There’s a door on the plane that’s not latched right. We can’t get on. I saw it. I saw it just now in Noah’s water bottle! It’s the door his seat is closest to!” 

“Oh my God,” Mark grumbled as he shook his head and grit his teeth. “Brad, I’m sure everything is fine.” He quickly looked around at the worried faces of the other first class crowd, most of them now whispering, or hastily checking their phones to see if there was some sort of crisis information to be had about their flight. 

Brad stood himself up straight, ready to state again that things weren’t safe, but one of the flight crew members came on the overhead speaker instead. 

“Ladies and Gentleman,” the female voice said, “we are having to do one more safety check of the aircraft before boarding, please be patient with us.” 

Mark, Brad, and Jason all turned to see the two passengers in wheelchairs, who had been boarded minutes ago, being brought back out. “I told you,” Brad whispered with a sigh of relief. “I can feel it. They’re fixing the problem.” He laid a hand on Mark’s shoulder. “Everything’s fine now.” 

Jason looked past Brad’s shoulder and caught Ryan’s eyes. He was used to Brad’s ‘moments’ but this one felt more ominous than most. _Nothing like starting a full week trip with a delay. I just want to get there. At least they did this before we boarded. Less time for Mark to drink. It’s already more than a three hour flight. No need to add any more time that he can be served. He always gets touchy after he’s been drinking on the plane and I fucking hate that._ He pulled his eyes away from Ryan’s and looked at Brad. “Are you going to be okay on the flight?”

Brad nodded. “Don’t worry. The danger has passed,” he said, motioning toward the giant airplane they could see through the floor to ceiling windows. “And I brought my lucky spatula.” He reached into his coat, and pulled out a plain black rubber spatula. He held it up before he kissed it. “I was going to say something before now, but I really think we should all kiss it. Especially after this.” He pointed out the window with the spatula before he stuck in in front of Jason’s face. 

“I… God, Brad,” Jason grumbled, looking around at all the passengers waiting to board. People they didn’t even know, families with babies, older couples, his employees, and his lover. _Ry. If kissing this spatula will keep him safe…_ Jason snatched the spatula from Brad’s hand and kissed it as inconspicuously as possible before handing it back. He caught Ryan’s amused eyes and shook his head. “There. It’s up to you to get everyone else to do it, too.”

Brad only smiled before he turned to Mark. “Cousin, please,” he said, handing him the spatula, “we all need to stay safe. There’s been a lot of bad aura around the house lately, let’s not let it follow us to Seattle.” He tilted his head a little as he tried to catch some sort of gleam of acceptance in Mark’s gray eyes, but he wasn’t sure if it was there or not. 

“I’ll just kiss Jason,” Mark stated, before he turned and cupped his hand around the back of his husband’s head, pulling him in for a short pop on the lips. “There,” he said, looking back at Brad, “I’m safe by association.” 

The chef’s mouth dropped open as he looked between the two men, ignoring the whispers and comments coming from around them. “I don’t think that will count,” he said, like he couldn’t believe it. “Mark. Mark. What am I ever going to do with you? You just constantly taunt the fates. You realize that, I hope,” he said, pointing the lucky spatula at his cousin, before he whirled around and headed for the other boys. 

Mike had been watching everything from a few rows of seats over, and he saw Brad coming for them next, waving the spatula in the air. “Here we go,” he said to Chester, shaking his head. “I know you’re gonna make me do this. You believe all of this stuff.” 

Chester barely glanced Mike’s way. “I’m just glad he brought the lucky spatula,” he said in a hurried breath right as Brad got to them. “No need to ask, I know the drill.” Chester took the cooking utensil and very happily gave it a kiss before turning to his boyfriend. “Your turn, Sexy Boy.” 

Ignoring the looks from passengers around him, Mike quickly planted a kiss on the spatula and passed it off to Ryan as though they were playing a game of hot potato.

Ryan didn’t question it. After years at YRS, along with Chester, he’d come to believe in everything Brad had to say. Time and time again he’d seen things happen that he couldn’t explain, and always Brad was one step ahead. He kissed the spatula without issue, and as he did a bit of relief washed over him. He handed it to Amir before he looked back toward the passengers waiting in line to board, watching Jason. _Mark just had to kiss him. He’s known Brad longer than any of us, you would think he would know that kissing Jason isn’t going to help him. He’s got to kiss the lucky spatula. Or. . .maybe I like that he didn’t kiss it._ He crossed his arms, trying to think of all the bad things that might happen to Mark, but he didn’t get far. It just wasn’t in him to wish an ill fate on anyone, and so he slumped his shoulders, and put his head down. 

Jason watched as Brad made the rounds of the boys and secured a kiss from every one of them. _Everyone but Mark. Oh well. Nothing bad ever seems to happen to him anyway._ He let out a quiet sigh, wishing he actually cared that Mark wasn’t playing along. _It’s not playing though. It’s real, and Mark acts like Brad’s just crazy. I think he really thinks that he is, and he just indulges him. I wish I could stay with Ry in Seattle. All the storms and everything, it’s the perfect weather to cuddle in. We could just lay in bed all day. We could make love and take naps and hold each other._ Jason leaned on the handle of his carry-on bag and looked down at the floor, closing his eyes as he felt Mark’s hand slide around his back.

“He’s such a crazy fool,” Mark mumbled as he watched his cousin. 

“You’d think after all these years you’d see that Brad’s right most of the time,” Jason said, trying hard not to cringe away from Mark’s touch. The longer he’d been in a relationship with Ryan, the harder it was to pretend that he welcomed Mark’s attention. With his mind focused on Seattle, the complicated shooting schedule was leaving him particularly grumpy toward his husband. It would be hard to find any time alone with his lover.

Mark rolled his eyes as he pulled his arm away. “I think _right_ is an overstatement. I’ve known him my whole life. Even as a kid he was like that. Just fucking cooky.” He let out a frustrated breath as he tugged at his buttoned up white shirt collar. He was ready to just be on the plane and leave all this nonsense behind. He wanted to sit down and have a drink and fantasize about all the great scenes he was going to get out of the boys over the next week. “I wouldn’t even have brought him along, but since we’re staying at a house this time instead of a hotel, I figure we can save on the budget. Hawaii cost us a pretty penny just in food expenses, if you remember.” 

Jason nodded. “The boys always enjoy Brad’s cooking anyway. It’s comforting, like being at home.” He looked up and his eyes were instantly pulled to Ryan again, who was standing off to Mike’s side talking to Amir. _I wish I could trade seats with Amir. Ha, stick Mark with Amir on the whole flight, that would really be something._ He couldn’t help the smile of amusement that crossed his face as he thought about how annoyed Mark would be.

Mark checked his boarding pass one more time, glancing over his assigned seat. He liked to know exactly where he was going once he stepped on the airplane. He hated it when people crowded the aisles as they tried to find their seats, when they should know ahead of time. “Wish they’d hurry up,” he mumbled as he looked over at his husband, ready to remind him to double check his seat, but he stopped. “Well don’t you look happy for a change,” he commented as he slipped his arm back around Jason’s waist. “It’s been awhile since we’ve been to Seattle. Remember when we went last time? For our, what was it? Second anniversary?” 

“Sounds right,” Jason mumbled, looking away from Ryan. “It was a nice trip.” He tried hard to remember if it really _had_ been a nice trip, but most of the romance he’d shared with Mark had been replaced with memories of his moments with Ryan now, and in any case, he wasn’t in the mood to reminisce. 

“It will be different this time, since we’ve got the hooligans with us,” he said, gesturing toward their group of employees with his phone, “but I’m sure we can steal at least one night away. There’s a club I’ve been looking at online that I’d like to go check out. We might just find some new talent while we’re there. Someone different. Someone who’s not an L.A. brat,” he hissed before he looked at Jason again, his eyes narrowing. His husband’s smile was gone, and now he just seemed agitated as he leaned a little away from Mark’s half-ass hold on him. _He’s different. I know something’s going on. If he’s doing what I think he’s doing. . .no. He’s not that stupid._

Jason sighed and looked toward the closed door that lead to the plane, wishing they could get on their way. “Sounds like a plan. New talent is always a good thing. I’m sure if we bring some of the boys with us they’ll pick up someone suitable.” The last thing he wanted was a night out alone with Mark. Not when he was longing to be with Ryan.

“That’s a good idea,” Mark offered just as they were being called to start filing into the plane. “We’ll take Chaz with us. He’s got a good eye. Good instincts. Good everything.” 

“Chaz?” Jason hardly held back the gasp as he cut his eyes over to Mike and Chester. Even from rows away the protective air around Mike was obvious. “You know Mike will lose his mind if we do that.” 

Mark let out a snort. “Fuck Mike,” he said, his gray eyes darting over his shoulder to catch sight of Mike leaning forward and kissing Chester quickly. “He’s such a snotty little,” put he stopped himself. Every time he thought about Mike Shinoda, something twisted in his stomach. More and more he was feeling a mix of emotions toward his prudish employee. He hated the hold Mike seemed to have over Chester, but in another way it was that hold and natural defiance that was making Mike Shinoda feel more like a challenge. _I’ll break him one day. One day he’ll come around. He’ll come around or Chaz will finally get tired of him. Not sure which one will come first. If I can get him to play ball, we could bring in another Asian boy. They’d look good together on film._ Mark’s mind twisted with possibilities as he followed the line of passengers, handing off his boarding pass and thinking that when they go out to the club later in the week, maybe someone with an Asian flare would be good. 

****  
TBC


	39. Seattle Part Two: Not So Sexy Drizzle

Trying to wrangle a pack of twenty-something guys off a plane, out of the airport, and into the van they’d rented for the week, was no easy task. The flight had only been three hours long, but it seemed every single one of Mark’s employees was having a bad attitude about it. Arguments over luggage and where everyone was sitting in the fifteen seat passenger van, had felt endless. Then there was the debate over food, and who was sharing rooms. To top it off, it was cloudy overhead, and rain had already started to drizzle. Every time Chester felt a drop of water touch him, he’d freak out, and Mark was already tired of it. 

“It’s not even storming, Chaz,” he barked. “Just get over it. Now,” he ordered as he looked at his gang of models as they stood on the top floor of the airport parking garage, with the sky over their heads, “I want everyone to get in the van, sit down and shut up. We’re going to the house, we’ll order food in for tonight, but then Brad will be cooking the rest of the time we’re here.” He made sure to make his voice extra gruff as he made eye contact with everyone. “Are we clear?” 

He got a group response of “Yes,” and head nods, and he was satisfied with that. “Brad, you’re driving,” he said as he handed the keys to the van over to the chef. “Jason and I will be leading the way in the car.” He pointed at the black Jaguar he’d rented along with van. “Just follow us, we have the directions,” he told Brad, who wasn’t looking as sure about all of this. 

“You want me to drive all of them?” the chef asked, shoving a nervous hand through his curls. “All of them?” 

Mark let out a sigh; all this bickering was killing the buzz he’d gained from his few drinks on the plane. “That is how a van works. Just stay right behind us. We’re going up in the hills, so we won’t be in traffic for too long.” He thought about patting his cousin on the shoulder, but the reflex to do so left him quickly and he headed toward the luxury car instead, pulling his one small suitcase along with him. All his other luggage was already stowed away in the van with everyone else’s. “No one give Brad any grief!” he shouted over his shoulder. 

Jason stood between the two vehicles for a moment, barely glancing at Mark as he got in the car. “Brad, it will be fine,” he said, motioning toward the van. “It could be worse, you could be following Mark. At least I drive the speed limit,” he added, rolling his eyes. “You all be quiet so Brad can think, okay?” He ran his eyes over the boys, stopping to look at Ryan before he cleared his throat. “Ryan, why don’t you sit up front so you can help navigate, if we get separated somehow.”

Ryan nodded without issue. “Okay, I can do that. I’ll, uh, I’ll keep my eye on you.” His cheeks blushed for half a second before he shook his head. “I mean, on you both,” he corrected, pointing a finger between his lover and the Jaguar. “Or, your car. . .I’ll just be watching,” he decided quickly before he turned away and cursed himself. He’d spent the duration of the flight constantly leaning over into the aisle, trying to catch a glimpse of Jason’s elbow as he sat in his first class seat. And now he knew he’d be doing much the same. He’d spend the next hour straining to watch the back of Jason’s head as they followed in the van. 

With a nod, Jason turned away before he said anything else. Ryan was always cute when he was fumbling over his words. He was usually so smooth and self-assured, but not in the irritating, condescending way Mark was. In Jason’s eyes, Ryan always came across as confident but not cocky. It was adorable when he stumbled on occasion. 

Mike watched Brad slide into the driver’s seat and start fussing with all of the mirrors. “You ready, babe?” he asked in Chester’s ear. They’d been standing, huddled together while all of Mark’s instructions were barked at them, and Mike could feel the tension in his lover’s body already. “Looks like we’re in the middle.” He motioned toward the open side door of the van and tugged Chester along.

“I guess I’m ready,” Chester mumbled, more to himself than to Mike. Riding in vans like this was something he’d done many times, but this felt different. He looked up at the sky, silently hoping the rain would go away and go away soon. _We have to do the outside scene when we get there. Three hours on a plane and probably an hour in this cramped van, no food, and Mark’s going to want us to look like a million bucks while we do it outside in the cold and wet._ He shivered from the thought, or maybe it was the chill in the air, before he climbed up and sat down, next to Mike. He went ahead and strapped on his seatbelt while he blankly watched Amir get in next.

“God, I hope all these bright fuckin’ ideas Mark has about shooting in the rain are for you,” Amir said, pointing at Mike and Chester as he sat down. “I’ll have to flat iron my hair every time we stop if he puts me out in this shit. Can you imagine? Every time we stop, I’ve got to blow dry and straighten this?” He petted his hand protectively over the blonde streak in his black hair. “Fucking rain and dampness. How am I supposed to be sexy like this?” 

Ryan turned around from the front seat, a grin already on his face. “You and your hair,” he said, staring straight at his scene partner. “You need to let us cut it. Spike it up like mine. Or Chazzy’s,” he stated, with a flip of his hand. “The fans would go crazy if they saw you with a black mohawk and that one sexy blonde streak in it.” 

Both of Amir’s hands went to cover his hair protectively as soon as Ryan said the word ‘cut’. “We are _not_ cutting my hair. Besides, one mohawk is enough in this group. If the fans miss seeing you getting sucked off by a guy with a mohawk that bad they can just pull up some of your old shit.” He motioned between Ryan and Chester with one finger, his other hand still on his hair.

Ryan let out a huff. “You know, you have no imagination,” he stated. “You’ve had that same damn hairstyle since I’ve known you.” The incredulous look on Amir’s face was enough to make Ryan give up, and his eyes drifted over to Chester. Imagination was one thing Chester Bennington didn’t lack in. And not just when it came to fashion or hairstyles. With Chester, there was always something new, which Ryan couldn’t say about Amir. 

Mike tightened his hold on Chester, one arm protectively over his shoulder as his boyfriend sat as close to him as he could get. It took every ounce of willpower he owned not to comment on Amir bringing up the very same thing Mark had brought up before about Ryan and Chester together, and even more not to say something when Ryan looked at Chester before he turned back around in his seat. _Amir just talks to hear himself talk. I’m just going to act like I didn’t hear it. Even though they all know that I did._ He snuggled Chester close to him and closed his eyes to block out everyone else. 

Noah sat forward, his hand going on the back of the seat right between Mike and Chester. “I loved all your scenes with Ryan,” he said, his excitement showing in his high pitched voice. “You know how much I like what you and Mike do,” he said as he tried to look between the two of them as much as he could from where he was, “but your stuff with Ryan was different. More, I don’t know. . .aggressive.” He said the word from between his teeth with a bit of a growl before he added, “It was always so hot and animalistic. In a good way, of course! You guys did such beautiful work. And all those series! I think my favorite one was Vampire Dicks In Paradise. The one that’s set in Hawaii,” he said, reaching around the seat and clapping Chester on the shoulder.

“Oh, thanks,” Chester said quietly. “That one was a lot of fun.” He was already counting the seconds, waiting for a reasonable and non-snotty amount of time before it would be okay to pull away from his coworker’s touch. “It was nice and warm there,” he added as the drizzle outside turned into more as it pounded against the windows. 

Noah gasped. “Wait, did you guys _actually_ film that in Hawaii?” He leaned back for a second, releasing Chester’s shoulder as he looked around before Devon offered up the affirmative. Vampire Dicks In Paradise _was_ filmed on location. “That’s so cool,” Noah whispered. “I know I’m fanboying a little here, but, man, Chaz, you and Ryan looked SO good together in that one, with all that heavy eyeliner, and those outfits,” he said almost as an afterthought before he sat all the way back and finally put his seatbelt on. _And now it gets to be me. I get to film on location just like they did. I don’t get to film with Chaz, of course, but I get to be on location._ The thought thrilled him enough that his smile earned him a poke in the side from Devon, who was ready with a good natured jab about him being a newbie. 

Mike clenched his teeth together as he listened to Noah ramble on and on. _Shut up! Do I have to be reminded every second of the day that Chester’s fucked everyone in this car?_ He could feel the anger in his chest and he knew that it would set the entire week on edge in the very worst way if he lost control before they even got to the house. _Hawaii. That whole time I was just in oblivious romantic bliss. I had no idea what he was doing._ As suddenly as the anger had built up, Mike felt it drop away, replaced with an almost overwhelming sense of sadness, of mourning. _I want to go back to that. I want to go back to not knowing, when everything seemed so clean between us. When I didn’t worry and freak out about every little thing. I wish we were like that again._ He let out a long breath through his nose and squeezed Chester’s shoulder.

Brad finally started up the van, and as the vehicle started to move, everyone got quiet. Chester looked over at his boyfriend, knowing all the talk about Vampire Dicks In Paradise probably wasn’t sitting with him well. _I’m not going to say anything to him. If we talk about it, he’ll just get upset. Hawaii was so long ago. That whole week all I wanted to do was talk to him. Every time I see something from that series, I can see it on my face. Vampire Ryan or not, I just wanted to be done so I could call Sexy Boy._ The thought brought a smile to his face as he recalled the feeling of falling in love for the first time. How being physically away from Mike had been almost torturous. 

Mike felt Chester burrow in just a little closer to his side, and he tilted his head to get his lips next to Chester’s ear. “Why don’t you try to sleep on the way there? Ignore the rain. I’ve got you.” He left a soft kiss on the side of Chester’s head, hoping that his boyfriend could tell he was trying not to let the talk of him and Ryan get to him. 

Chester let his eyes fall shut. With everyone staying quiet, choosing to look out the windows at the city instead, the rain sounded even louder. He turned his head into Mike’s flannel shirt, nuzzling his nose against the smell of coconut and his body relaxed a little. _He stayed calm. For a second I thought he was going to make some comment about things, but he didn’t. I know he can do it. I know he can keep it all in perspective. Everything with Ry is work. Sex wise, anyway. Maybe Mike’s finally starting to realize that._

****

Jason put the car in park and picked his phone up from the little cradle it sat in during the ride, calling out directions. “Why don’t you go on inside and make sure everything is okay while the boys get their luggage? I’ll get everyone organized and assigned to the correct rooms,” he added, twisting around in the front seat to reach his bag with his clipboard inside. He had very carefully planned the layout of the rooms so that Ryan’s was on the opposite end of the house from his and Mark’s, on the chance that they got a moment alone. He was anxious to get everyone inside and settled so he could try to steal a second with Ryan - a quick kiss or even just a hug. 

He didn’t wait for Mark’s answer before he opened the door and stepped out, his hand instinctively going over his eyes to shield them from the light rain. His eyes caught Ryan’s through the windshield of the van and he smiled, his whole mood lifting as he saw Ryan’s answering grin. 

“Thank the Fates, we’re here,” Brad announced as he turned the van off. The quiet of the engine sent a sigh of relief through him. “I’m never driving in this city again. When we go grocery shopping later, one of you can drive,” he stated, poking Ryan in the bicep, since he was the only one within reach. 

Ryan waited until he saw Jason turn away before he looked over at the chef. Without warning the image of him and Jason going to the store together popped into his mind. They were in a strange city where no one knew them. They could go to the store and hold hands while they pushed a cart and collected things from a list. They could debate over brands of bread and the price of steak. Normal couple stuff. “Yeah,” he said with a nod. “You can take it easy, Brad. Me and. . .one of the other guys will take care of it for you.” 

Brad smiled as he laid a hand on Ryan’s shoulder. “You’re a saint sometimes,” he offered before he unbuckled his seatbelt. “Alright, boys, everyone out!” he hollered over his shoulder. 

Mike’s arm was numb where Chester had leaned against it the entire ride, but he didn’t mind. He had even drifted in and out of sleep a little as the van made its way through the unfamiliar city in the rain. With his other hand he reached over and cupped Chester’s cheek, letting his thumb graze over his lip ring. “Ches? It’s time to move, we’re here.”

Chester sat up slowly, his head aching a little as he tried to orient himself. He squeezed his eyes closed, then opened them wide again before he looked around at his boyfriend and out the window. “Fuck me,” he whisper-swore as he watched the drops hit the glass. “Why Seattle? They could have picked anywhere else.” He let out a huff before he decided just to accept it. If Mark wanted to film them in the rain, it was going to happen. Today, tomorrow, if they had to stay an extra day, Mark would do it just to get what he wanted, and Chester knew it. 

“It’s gonna be fine, babe, come on,” Mike encouraged, leaning his neck to each side and rolling his shoulders. “You can go stand under the porch and I’ll grab both our bags.” He motioned to the van door that Amir had just hopped out of, holding his backpack over his head. 

“No, that’s okay. I might as well just do it and get it over with.” He took a deep breath and got out of the van. Immediately the drizzle hit him, and he shivered as he felt the cold rain run down his shaved head and onto his face. He pulled on the sleeves of his gray jacket, wishing it had a hood. He slung his yellow backpack over his shoulder, not waiting for Mike. Instead he rounded the van, ready to pick out their bags among what looked like a sea of suitcases. 

“That’s mine,” Ryan offered as he appeared beside Chester, worming his way around to grab the red roller suitcase. 

Mike frowned as he climbed out of the van and made his way to the back. “Ours are over there,” he pointed to the left side, opposite of where Chester was standing. “Here,” he said, reaching in and grabbing Chester’s black and white striped suitcase. Setting it on the ground, he extended the handle and put it in Chester’s hand. “Go on, you don’t have to wait for me in the rain.” He turned his attention back to the van and pulled his own plain black suitcase out. He knew it was his from the small zebra-print ribbon he’d tied around the handle ages ago.

The rain seemed to be coming down harder, and so Chester took Mike’s words to heart. He headed for the house, briefly glancing around at the tall trees that surrounded the property. The driveway was paved, but the path leading up to the yellow two story house, was gravel with fancy paver stones dotting the way. All of which didn’t work well with roller suitcases. Chester closed down the handle and picked the bag up as he rushed to get to the long covered porch, where Ryan was waiting for him. 

“This place is nice,” were the first words out of Ryan’s mouth as Chester practically flew up the steps. They both moved to the side as Caleb and Devon shuttled past them, oohing and awing as they went. 

“I didn’t really doubt it would be,” Chester said as he wiped the rain water from his face. He barely gave the house a once over before he turned around and looked back toward the van, trying to spot his boyfriend. 

“Come on, let’s go find our room,” Ryan suggested, more out of habit than current circumstances. He even went to tug on Chester’s sleeve, but stopped himself. _Oh. Right. We’re not sharing a room this time._ He looked out into the rain to see Mike headed their way and Chester waving to him, like they’d been separated for years and were now getting to see each other for the first time. Ryan let out a sigh and mumbled that he’d see Chester inside, before he turned and followed Brad into the house. 

“You three - Devon, Caleb, and Noah - you’re down the hallway here, there’s a long room in the back with four beds.” Jason shrugged as the trio looked at each other. “Not everyone gets a private room, you know that. Especially in circumstances like this. There’s just not enough to go around.” He looked down at his clipboard, reminding himself which rooms were on the main floor and which were on the second floor. “Amir and Ryan, you’re in the back bedroom upstairs, last one down the hall. And Brad, you’re across from them. Alone,” he added, just to make certain the cook didn’t freak out about sharing with one of the boys.

Brad nodded, but wasn’t really listening. He’d already spotted the open kitchen, just off the main living space. Everything looked updated and new - stainless steel appliances and brown and black speckled granite countertops. There was a long bar that wrapped around the outline of the kitchen, with enough stools for eight people to sit and eat, and the work triangle was perfect. The cook shivered in delight as he headed that way, leaving his bags right where they were. “I’ll go look at it in a minute,” he said over his shoulder as he went to run his hands over every inch of the kitchen first. If this was going to be his workspace for the next week, he needed to make sure it was okay, that there were no bad auras or feelings coming off of anything. The last thing he wanted was to endanger any of the boys by preparing a meal in a cursed kitchen. 

Jason watched Brad move toward the kitchen, his bags abandoned in the foyer, and shook his head. None of the cook’s quirks really surprised him anymore. He was just about to say something to Ryan when Mike and Chester came in the front door, so he turned toward them instead. Mike’s blue spikes were plastered on his forehead from the rain, and Chester looked miserable already, despite being far less wet. “You two are in the front bedroom upstairs.” He pointed in the general direction of the room and then suggested, “you should drop your stuff and then you both need to get cleaned up. You’re first on the schedule, you know. Did you look at the script?” 

Chester groaned as he wiped his hand over his face, hating the pasty feel from being hit with rain water. “Yeah,” he said, “we got it.” He turned and looked back outside. “Is there even enough light out there to get good shots?” he asked, hoping maybe the clouds could work in his favor. “You don’t want to waste film trying to shoot in the gray cloudy atmosphere when we could do some kickass stuff in here on this beautiful furniture,” he offered as he headed into the main living space, dodging between the oversized white plush couch and the high-end looking coffee table. He pointed at the brick fireplace, and let his eyes roll all the way up it. “We could even get a fire going,” he suggested hopefully. “Fire scenes are sexy.” 

Jason brushed off the question with a wave of his hand. “You’re not getting out of going outside, Chaz, you know how this works. And you’ll get your fireplace time…” he lifted the top page of his clipboard and scanned the week’s schedule. “Tomorrow. It’s the follow up to the deck scene.” He dropped the paper and looked at Mike. “You need to do something about your hair.”

Mike scowled as he looked over at Chester, who was still lingering in front of the empty fireplace. “Is it going to even matter? With this rain?” He hated being told what to do, and even though he’d already planned to fix his hair when they got upstairs, the fact that Jason had told him to do it made him want to push back a little. 

The mention of rain and hair caught Chester’s attention and he headed back to where his boss and boyfriend were standing. “That’s right,” he whined as he brushed a hand over his mohawk, which was still standing, for the most part. “Jay, you know what water does to my hair. I’ll look like a drowned rat! I can’t look like that on camera,” he stressed, his mouth hanging open. When he and Mike were at home, walking around with a flat, wet mohawk didn’t matter, but at work that was a different story, and when it came to filming, that was like a whole other world of hair necessities. 

“Are you _sure_ you read the script?” Jason asked pointedly. “The whole idea is for the two of you to looked wrecked by the end so that the next scene in front of the fire makes sense. Fluffy towels and drying each other off and all that nonsense.” He shook his head. “I’m not going to listen to you complain about your hair all week, Chaz. You two go get ready.” He dismissed them and started to walk down the hall to the room he was sharing with Mark. 

“I’m just going to shave my head,” Chester spit before he turned away and grabbed his backpack and suitcase. “Come on, Sexy Boy,” he ordered without meaning to, “let’s go find our room. It’s probably got damn skylights in it.” 

Mike sighed as he followed Chester up the stairs, knowing that once they were alone Chester’s mood would shift. They stepped into the front bedroom and Mike raised his eyebrow. The window shade was up, giving a nice view of the trees out back, but also the rain. _I’ll be closing that before we do anything,_ he thought, looking at the black bedframe and gray and white striped blankets. It was a nice enough space, a little on the smaller side with the king sized bed in it and just a closet off the side. _No private bathroom. But that’s not any different than YRS_ , he reasoned. He dropped his bags inside the room and turned to shut the door behind him so he and Chester could talk privately. 

“Oh, Ches! Check it out! There’s a lock on our door!” Mike knew he sounded unreasonably excited about having a door that locked, but it was one of the small things he missed when they were working.

Chester tossed his yellow backpack on the bed before he looked over, his eyes going wide with surprise. “Really? I mean, well, yeah that’s probably normal.” He looked around for a second, remembering that they weren’t at YRS. “Normal houses have locks. Does it work?” 

Mike pressed the small button on the inside of the door handle, his other hand on the outside of the handle. He jiggled it. “Yep! It doesn’t move!” He pushed the door closed, the lock engaged, and went straight to Chester. “That’s so great. It already makes being here better than YRS in my book.” He slid his hands around Chester’s waist, and the feeling of his damp clothes reminded him how little his boyfriend wanted to be in Seattle. “I know you hate the rain and all, but at least we have a lock. A _lock_ ” he repeated with emphasis. 

Chester returned the embrace, letting his hands drop down to Mike’s ass. “Then I vote we lock it every time we’re in here.” He could still hear the rain, not just as it patted against the large window over their bed, but from above as it tapped against the twin skylights, but he blocked it out. He forced his mind to shove it away so he could close his eyes and concentrate on Mike instead. He squeezed his fingers into the butt cheeks of Mike’s jeans, pulling him up against himself before he leaned in, letting their lips slip together. 

Despite the rain, the chill that lingered over them both from being wet, Mike could feel Chester’s body heat against him. He tightened his hold on Chester’s waist and sucked on his lip ring, thinking that it had been too many hours since they’d been able to kiss. He would kiss Chester all day if they had nothing else to do, and in the back of his mind he knew that he shouldn’t, but he couldn’t help but grind his hips forward under Chester’s seeking hands. It wouldn’t do any good to take advantage of the locked door before they were expected to perform on camera, but he just couldn’t help himself. 

“Mmmm,” Chester moaned. He felt Mike press against his hips, and the idea of spinning his boyfriend around and getting him on the bed entered his mind. Mike’s kiss was hot, and maybe that was because Chester’s skin was cold and his clothes were wet, but it was a turn on. He could already feel his heart pumping a little faster, and all thoughts of work and the fact that this was exactly what they needed to be doing, only outside and in front of the camera, vanished. 

Mike broke his hold on Chester’s lips and kissed along his jawline, leaving little damp spots on his way to his boyfriend’s neck. He heard the sigh of approval as he dropped kisses down the side of his neck and sucked warm, soft circles into Chester’s pulse. There was enough restraint present to keep him from leaving a hickey before they had to go do their scene, but Mike wanted to mark him. It was hard to pull away and move to another spot, being careful not to go too far. Everything in him wanted to keep everyone and everything locked out while they lost themselves in each other. He pulled his hands around to the front of Chester’s jeans, hooking his fingers over the top and grazing his thumbs along each side of his belly button.

Chester dropped his hands from Mike’s ass long enough to pull his wet jacket off, dropping it to the floor. His eyes fluttered as Mike’s lips kept pecking his throat and then his ear. “Wait,” he called, pulling back. He saw the look in Mike’s dark eyes - his pupils already a little blown. “Just a sec, Sexy Boy,” Chester breathed. He took a step back, his legs hitting the bed, and he stopped. He pulled his t-shirt off, tossed it away and then curled his hand through the air. “Okay, let’s go,” he said with a needy grin. 

Without a second thought, Mike pushed Chester down on the edge of the bed and dropped to his knees on the soft carpet. He circled Chester’s wrists with his fingers, continuing his kisses along Chester’s collarbone, between his nipples, and following a trail down to dip his tongue inside his belly button. He felt Chester’s stomach tense and he smiled against his warm skin. “Ticklish, babe?” he asked, holding Chester’s arms still against his sides.

“Yes,” Chester said with a short giggle. “But don’t stop.” He leaned forward, letting his lips and nose nuzzle into Mike’s blue hair, and even though it was still a little damp, he didn’t mind. “As long as you don’t tickle me to the point of torture. . .well, maybe torture,” he amended. 

Mike opened his mouth and blew warm air across Chester’s stomach, turning his lips back into the skin and dragging them from one side to the other. “I love you,” he mumbled, letting go of Chester’s wrists and sliding his hands around to his back, digging his fingers into the space between Chester’s skin and his jeans and pulling him closer. He was ready to get those jeans off and taste all the skin they were hiding. It didn’t occur to him that he needed to save that for later. He didn’t care about later.

Chester’s hands found their way to Mike’s shoulders, and his fingers quickly walked their way down his sides, pulling on Mike’s flannel. “Take this off,” he begged, trying to get around to Mike’s front and fumble with the buttons. He managed to get two undone before he gave up and started tugging on it instead, hoping to get it up and over Mike’s head. 

“Here, here,” Mike said breathlessly, letting go of Chester to finish unbuttoning the shirt. “You’re going to pop the buttons off doing that.” He quickly got the flannel off, then pulled his t-shirt off too. “Better?”

Chester leaned back on the bed, looking at his lover’s bare shoulders, and the curve of his neck that connected him all together. He was breathing with his mouth open as he kicked his shoes off and scooted back on the bed. “Come here,” he said, inviting Mike to crawl on top. “Just for a few minutes,” he added as his good sense started to show up in the back of his mind. 

“Yeah. Just a few,” Mike answered, getting up from the floor and climbing between Chester’s parted thighs, settling his hips down flush against his boyfriend’s and burying his face into his neck. “You’re going to have to stop me then. Because I want you so bad I can’t stand it.” 

Chester spread his legs a little wider, letting their hidden dicks touch a little more. He latched his hands around Mike’s body, pressing his fingertips into spine and skin. “Okay, I’ll stop you,” he promised with his eyes closed. He arched his back a little, his cock begging for contact. Attention. Chester slid one hand up Mike’s back, sucking in the warmth of his skin as it grew colder outside.

Mike lifted up and planted his elbows on either side of Chester’s head, looking down into his face as he wiggled his lower half a little bit. He leaned down and kissed the tip of Chester’s nose, then his forehead. “I know you hate it when your hair is messed up, but I think you’re so fucking cute,” he said, keeping their dicks in contact. He dropped a few more kisses along Chester’s face and whispered, “tell me what you want. I know we should stop but I don’t want to.” 

Chester’s eyes opened. He could see the skylights overhead and the rain that was falling, and he let out a sigh. “I want both of us to get these jeans off and go at each other. And then I want a massively huge cup of steaming hot coffee and a hot bath and something to eat. I’m starving. And then I want us to snuggle in this huge bed and forget that it’s raining outside.” He brought one hand up, cupping it over the back of Mike’s head as he smoothed his fingers into his blue hair. “That’s what I want. But I know we have to go to work instead.” 

“I can give you all that, even if the first will be in front of the cameras, I’ll give you the rest.” Mike reached to pull Chester’s mouth to his in a long, deep kiss again, taking his time and exploring every bit of Chester’s lips and tongue. “I’ll keep you warm,” he promised as he pulled back, his mind already skipping ahead to coffee in bed and falling asleep together. 

Both of Chester’s hands dropped to Mike’s hips. He really wanted to yank on his jeans. He wanted to slap his ass. He wanted to buck from under his lover, and let their dicks mingle a little more, even from behind denim. But he knew it was leading to something they couldn’t finish, and that was always depressing. “I’m counting on you to be my personal heater,” Chester said as he slapped Mike’s ass playfully rather than sensually. He picked his head up enough to plant a kiss on his boyfriend’s chin, and his dark goatee. “Let me up, sadly.” 

With a groan, Mike lifted up and fell to the side, freeing Chester from underneath him. “I don’t want to,” he pouted, even though he’d done as asked. “I guess we should get ready, though… I’m sure somebody will be up here looking for us soon.” He ran his hand over his hair as he twisted onto his back. “Ches? This is going to be different, isn’t it? It won’t be like at YRS where it’s a closed set. This house is too small for that.” He closed his eyes and waited for the answer he knew was coming. 

Chester sat up, his head and shoulders going forward as his equilibrium adjusted. He let out a long breath as he stared across the room at the door to the closet. “Yeah, it will be different. Get ready to see more of your coworkers than you ever wanted to. And they’ll see us.” He reached over and laid a hand on Mike’s thigh. “But we’re all in this together, you know? We don’t judge each other for it.” He twisted enough to see Mike’s face. “Sometimes it’s educational. Getting to watch, I mean. Not for the sex,” he made sure to say quickly, “but getting to watch Jason and Mark from this side. You know? Especially watching Jason with the camera and the angles and how he moves people around and the different lenses for different effects and shots.” 

“I guess,” Mike answered slowly. The thought of all the guys watching him and Chester made his skin crawl. “I just… it’s me and you, you know? And I know what you’re going to say, that the videos are out there and everyone can see them, and blah, blah, blah,” he said, waving his hand in the air. “But it’s going to be different when they’re right there. And can see everything.” Mike took a hard swallow and rolled his head to look up at his boyfriend. “I know you think about it like it’s just work, but I still think about it like it’s just us. I’m sorry, that’s the only way I can do it.” 

Chester nodded, his hand sliding up and down Mike’s thigh lightly in comfort. “I know. I’m sorry. I wish we could keep it all closed, but that’s not going to happen.” 

“It makes me want to take Mark up on his stupid deal,” Mike said, sitting up and sighing. “At least we’d be alone.”

Chester’s roaming hand stopped. “Really?” 

Mike sighed and rubbed his eyes with the heels of his palms. “I don't know, Ches. I mean, when Mark was talking to us about it I was like, no! But the more I think about it, and hate how things are… I don’t know. It seems like it could be a way out, you know?”

Chester took his hand back, cupping them both in his own lap as he nodded. “It would cut our time in half, Mike. In _half_ ,” he stressed before he stood up from the bed. “I know it’s a shitty trade, but in just a year we could, well, we wouldn’t have to be in front of the camera anymore.” He pointed toward the locked bedroom door. “And besides, I think we might be able to do some things to make it not so. . .intrusive.” 

“Maybe. I don’t know,” Mike said again, pushing himself up off the bed, all of the warm excited feelings from before gone. “Let’s go find the bathroom and do something about your hair. My hair. Our hair.” He unzipped his suitcase and dug around for his bag of toiletries.

Chester watched his boyfriend for a minute, his hope over maybe getting somewhere with the conversation over Mark’s recent offer fading quickly. “Yeah. Let’s get all prettied up so we can go out and get soaked.” He looked away and to the dark hardwood floors. _I’ve got to pull myself out of this. Having a bad attitude isn’t going to help anything._ He dragged his yellow backpack over to himself and opened it up, ready to go explore and find the closest bathroom. 

****

The drizzle outside had turned into more of a pelting. Chester tried to keep his eyes open. He tried to fake all the noises of ecstasy and say all his lines he’d managed to memorize, but it wasn’t happening. They were outside on the back deck, just off the main living space of the rented house. Mark and Jason had moved all the high end patio furniture out of the way except one extra long lounge chair. Now Chester was bent over it, naked from his head to his toes, with Mike behind him. 

Chester’s fingers dug into the wet gray material of the piece of furniture that wasn’t very stable under his weight and the force of the thrusts from Mike behind him. He looked up, but the rain was in his eyes, stinging them and he couldn’t get a hand free to wipe them clear. 

“Chaz!” Mark yelled from where he was standing a few feet away, a large black umbrella over his head, “I need to see you smile and open those gorgeous eyes of yours! I’m paying you to be sexy, not look like a cat that’s been dropped in the sewer!”

_I wouldn’t look like this if it wasn’t fucking raining. He’s lost it. We need to go in. It’s too cold. And wet._ Chester flung his head, trying to get his soppy mohawk out of his face before flashing the smile Mark asked for, but it only lasted a second. 

Mike bit his lip as he heard Mark yell - again. He knew Chester was struggling and just having that in his head was making it hard to keep his concentration on the task at hand. He also didn’t know how on earth he was going to keep his balance and reach around to close his hand over Chester’s dick. Everything was slippery and wet, cold and miserable, and it was taking every bit of his brain to even be able to keep his erection.

It didn’t help that there were portable lights illuminating the deck, and that the other boys were crowded around the windows to the deck, getting an eye full of what was happening. Every time he thought about them his pace faltered. 

Mark watched closely before he strode to the other side of the deck, dodging around Jason and his camera. “Good,” he said, as Mike picked his pace up. Both of Mike’s hands were latched to Chester’s soaking wet hips, and in that moment Mark decided that his favorite model needed another tattoo. Something big and colorful, right on one of his hips or his thigh. “Harder, Mike!” Mark yelled as he headed back the other way. “Pound his ass, and dig your nails into him! I want to see it! I want your fans to see it!” 

_I don’t want to leave marks unless I want to leave them. Why is he being such an ass?_ Mike squeezed his fingers tighter, but didn’t turn his nails into Chester’s tender skin. He didn’t know if he could go harder. It seemed like this was taking forever this time, and his legs were aching. 

Mark’s eyes narrowed as he tried to see through the rain. He could tell Mike had gripped Chester a little harder, but the nail digging wasn’t happening. His teeth grit. _He’s going to learn to do what he’s told, and going through Chester is the fastest way to get to him._ “Chaz!” he hollered as he walked closer to where they were, being mindful to stay out of Jason’s camera angle, “you’re limp,” he barked as he tilted his head to get a good look at Chester’s cock. “Either get yourself hard right now, or you’ll have to take some Rhino pills,” he insisted with a huff. Limp dicks were the biggest turnoff. An unenthused cock could ruin a shoot, and Mark wasn’t going to let that happen. 

Chester’s eyes opened as he looked up and shook his head. He was ready to say no, that he didn’t want to take pills - that he could get hard on his own - just as thunder clapped overhead. A scream came out of Chester’s mouth instead as he jumped forward, but Mike’s grip kept him in place. 

“Ches, babe, it’s okay,” Mike said, and immediately cringed. “I’m sorry, sorry,” he added in a panic, turning toward Jason and Mark. “Damn it,” he swore, knowing he wasn’t supposed to turn toward the camera either. 

Mark’s teeth grit. “You’re not fucking Chester! And he’s not your ‘babe’, he’s Charlie Bang! Now, keep going!” Mark ordered as he headed back toward the house, standing under the overhang of the roof. “Mike, say your lines!” he hollered. “And call him by his right name!” 

Mike felt his chest tighten in a full blown panic attack. His mind was blank as he leaned over his boyfriend, trying to shield him from the rain as much as possible, and not one single line from the script came to his mind. Not one. It was the first time he’d forgotten what he was supposed to say so thoroughly that he couldn’t even ad lib. He put his lips next the Chester’s ear, on the side away from the camera, in desperation. “Ches, I can’t remember my lines!” he whispered. 

Chester was staring down at the wet floor of the deck, and how the wood was ten times darker now than it had been earlier. “Just say I’m wet and sexy,” he hissed back before he tried to concentrate on his own problem. He still wasn’t hard, and he wasn’t sure if he was going to get there. Everything was too wet and cold, and the rain was coming down in sheets now. His ass felt frozen and numb as Mike pounded into him, which wasn’t a turn on in any way. He tried to think of things that did turn him on. Mike in the hot shower with him. Their bed at home and the spiked collar he loved. The way Mike wrapped his lips around his dick when he’d suck him off and for a half second, Chester felt his cock start to twitch. 

But then thunder boomed overhead again, and Chester yelped as his entire body jerked. “Mark!” he called, not caring or thinking about what he was doing, “let us stop! Please! Let us stop!” 

Jason looked away from his camera in shock the minute Chester said his husband’s name. It was the first time anyone had ever dared to call Mark out in the middle of a shoot. He tried to intervene before Mark blew up. “It _is_ difficult to get the shots right now, the rain is making it hard to see. The drizzle was fine, but this is too much.” He looked back out at Chester and Mike, wondering how Mike was managing at all in the conditions they were shooting in. 

Mark’s fist was clenched. He hated wasting time. He hated wasting film. But most of all, he hated it when one of his plans didn’t go the way he wanted. “Fine,” he told Jason, gesturing back toward the house. “Get the equipment inside.” He spun his glare back toward his employees. “Alright, we’re done for now,” he told them. 

Mike took a deep, grateful breath, getting his emotions a little more under control. “Hold on, babe,” he whispered, keeping his voice low as he took care to separate himself from Chester. “You okay?” A chill from the air hit his cock instantly as he pulled out and he was as limp as Chester before he knew it. “Fuck. This sucks.” 

“I’m fine, let’s go,” Chester said in one giant breath as he stood himself up straight. His ass hurt, and his back was aching and so were his legs, but he didn’t care. He just wanted to get in out of the rain. He could barely hear what Mike had just said over the downpour right when lightning streaked across the sky, lighting everything up twice as bright before the thunder followed. Every other thought was gone, as Chester hopped over the lounge chair and made it to the sliding patio doors. He pushed them open and got inside, his wet feet slapping against the wood floors. 

Mike was right behind him, pushing past Ryan, who was on his way out to help Jason as he struggled with the equipment. “Ches! Towel!” He called, grabbing them from the bench right inside the door and holding one over his private area as best he could. He needed Chester to take one so he could wrap his around his own body. He could feel the heat of the stares from the other boys who were all trying to act like they weren’t watching. 

Chester was already headed toward the stairs. He didn’t want to be around anyone. He was ready to lock himself in the closet or hide under all the blankets in the big king sized bed. But Mike’s voice stopped him and he turned around. His mouth was open as he breathed, as he wiped his face and shoved his dripping wet mohawk out of his eyes. Mike was right by the door, trying to cover himself up as everyone else stood around watching with their eyes averted. 

Chester’s shoulders slumped as he headed back. He barely glanced at his coworkers as he got to his lover and took the towel he was being offered. He had no issue being naked in front of everyone, but he knew it was a big deal to Mike, and so he quickly ran the fluffy yellow towel over his hair and face before he wrapped it around his waist. 

Mike nodded at him silently as he wrapped his towel around him, tucked high up under his arms like a woman would do. He still didn’t like having his chest exposed and he was cold, anyway. The whole room was quiet as Jason and Ryan came in, camera and lights in tow. Mike spared them a quick glance before his attention went back to Chester. _He’s upset, and it’s not just the rain. It’s the whole thing, that was a disaster. And Mark’s pissed._

Mark came in right behind Jason and Ryan. He pulled the slide door closed with a _bang!_ before he spun around and wrangled his massive wet umbrella closed. “Chaz!” he screamed as he took a few steps forward. “You’re just wasting my time,” he growled as he walked up to stand right in front of Chester. He watched as the smaller man cringed back, and just the sight of it turned him on a little as he poked a strong finger into Chester’s breastplate. “Next time I tell you to get hard, you do it,” he hissed before his poke turned into a hold. He grabbed Chester’s wrist, jerking him forward as he breathed heavily into his face, his voice coming out like it was scraping against sandpaper. “And don’t you _ever_ tell me when it’s time to stop. Do you hear me? You do what I say, when I say, where I say.” He tightened his grip on Chester’s small, tattooed wrist, knowing he could easily break it if he wanted too. 

Chester’s whole body was shaking as he nodded. “Sorry,” he whimpered, his eyes locked with Mark’s before he dropped his to the floor. He didn’t dare try and pull away, even though he could feel Mark’s crushing hand close tighter around him. “I’m sorry, it’s just, I’m sorry.” 

“You should be,” Mark insisted, before he let go, throwing Chester’s wrist away from him like it was garbage. He did a ninety-degree turn, his gray eyes hitting Mike next. “And you,” he growled as he left Chester cowering. “I thought you were a professional,” he said placing himself right in front of Mike and leering down on him. “When you’re fucking him on my time, his name is Charlie Bang, you got that? You do what I say and you follow my scripts. And when I tell you to dig your nails into him, you do it!”

Mike hadn’t said a word. For the second time since he’d come to work at YRS, Mark was feeling the satisfaction of watching Mike Shinoda tremble in front of him. He looked over, eyeing Chester’s defeated stance before he turned back to Mike and leaned in a little closer. “He’s always going to be Charlie Bang,” he whispered. “And you’re always going to be Kenji Kobayashi.” He wet his lips. “That is, unless you want it to be about Mike and Chester instead. It’s a pity, really,” he said, slowing his words as he dragged them out. He raised his hand, taking Mike’s chin and forcing him to look over at Chester, who looked like a kid on the playground that had just been bullied, “you see that?” Mark asked, his voice just between him and Mike. “That’s all your fault.” 

He waited a second, watching as Mike drank in the sight of his boyfriend and the full strength of what was just said before he let him go and stepped back. Satisfied, Mark spun around and threw his glare at the room. “Let this be a warning!” he told everyone, his voice booming. “We’re here to get the most out of this location. There will be no more fuck ups. I’m spending way too much money for you boys to ruin a shoot!” His voice thundered through the space, just as actual thunder rumbled overhead and Chester flinched as he jumped closer to Mike’s side. 

Instantly Mike had his arm around Chester’s still wet shoulders, pulling him in close. He could feel the shivers and shakes in his boyfriend, and the familiar mix of anger and fear he felt toward Mark as the boss ranted. At one point he’d been about to open his mouth to say something but thought better of it when he caught Jason’s face in the corner of his eye and read the warning there. Nothing good could come of him saying anything to Mark in that moment. Before Mark grabbed his face, he’d seen the circle of his coworkers one by one drop their heads and become interested in the floor. His own head had been held high in defiance until Mark forced him to look at Chester. Chester, who looked as though the life had been sucked out of him as he stood and took Mark’s abuse. As he held on now, keeping Chester safely next to him, he struggled to keep himself from lashing back at Mark. He knew it would be stupid. There would be no way it would end well. 

“I want everyone out of my sight, right now,” Mark ordered as he headed for the kitchen area. “Mike, Chaz!” he called over his shoulder, “go get dried off. I don’t want any whining tomorrow about sniffles.” He went right to the cabinets and started opening them up and slamming them shut as he searched for some kind of alcohol. Whisky. Bourbon. Vodka. Anything would do to calm his nerves, but he wasn’t finding anything other than empty shelves. 

“Come on, Ches,” Mike mumbled, taking a step toward the stairs. Nobody had said anything yet, and he felt the tension in the room. All he could think about was getting away from Mark, getting Chester upstairs and warm. Talking through what had just happened and had gone wrong, and finding out how bad it was really going to be with Mark. _I don’t know if Ches has ever had a bad shoot before. Maybe he won’t know what to say. Maybe I shouldn’t say anything. Should I say something? It’s my fault he wasn’t hard, that’s my job, I’m his boyfriend. I’m supposed to make sure he wants me too._ His spirits dropped even lower as he pulled Chester along. 

The stairs seemed to be extra long as Chester let himself be lead. His wrist was throbbing and his ass was still sore. Despite having just been out in the rain, his lips were dry and he was pretty sure he might be dehydrated. They stepped into their room, and Chester watched Mike shut the door and lock it. The sound of the click - of the acknowledgement that they were really alone - was a bit of a relief and Chester let out a sigh as he walked over to the bed and sat down. He was careful to stay on the edge of the bed since he was still wet. Already he was feeling the dampness from the towel on his ass, and he knew he needed to get clean clothes and go get in a hot shower. He shivered as he sat staring at his suitcase, which was only a foot or two away but he couldn’t seem to get himself to move. _Jason said we wouldn’t film in the thunder, but we still did. Mark was going to make us keep going if I hadn’t freaked out. It’s going to be like that next time, too. I just know it._ His chest felt tight as his mind drifted forward over things that hadn’t happened yet. 

Mike kept his mouth shut, his mind focused on getting Chester warm and dry. He pulled a clean set of pajamas and underwear from his suitcase, then glanced at his boyfriend. The far away look in his eyes reminded Mike of the way Chester had looked the last time Mark had snapped in front of him, when he’d slapped him upstairs in the bedroom at the YRS house, and Mike hadn’t been there. Hadn’t been able to stand up for him until afterwards. “Ches?” he said quietly. “I’m gonna go turn the water on… get it warm, okay? Are you okay here if I go do that real quick?” 

Chester’s gaze slowly lifted to Mike’s face. “Yeah,” he croaked softly. “I’m sorry, Mike,” he said, running his hand over his sopping wet hair. “I’m sorry I got you in trouble. And trust me, you’re not the first person to slip up and say the wrong name. If I wasn’t such a worthless wimp, it wouldn’t have happened in the first place.” 

“Stop,” Mike said as he stood up and moved to stand in front of Chester. “This has nothing to do with you, and I hate it when you say stuff like that. You’re not worthless, you’re not a wimp. The whole thing was insane. We never should have been out there in that rain. There’s a difference in a little light rain and a storm. _I’m_ sorry I didn’t speak up for us, Ches. I… I didn’t know what to do.” He let out a frustrated sigh and lifted his hand to the top of Chester’s wet hair. “I’m sorry, too. But I’m gonna get you in the bath and warm you up, and I’m gonna make it better. I promise.” He scrubbed his fingers lightly though the flat, wet mohawk and down the back of Chester’s neck. “Promise.” 

Chester nodded. “Okay. Thanks, Mike.” It felt like an effort to form words at the moment, but Chester knew his boyfriend was just as upset as he was. He reached out and stroked his hand lightly down Mike’s arm before he stood up. “If it’s a big bathtub, you can join me,” he offered innocently. 

“If that’s what you want, I’d love it.” Mike pressed a quick kiss to Chester’s cheek. “God, babe, you’re freezing. I’ll be quick.” He gathered up his clothes and was out the door, down the hall to the bathroom that served all of the upstairs bedrooms. _I don’t give a fuck what anyone else wants tonight, if Chester wants to stay in the bathtub until midnight, that’s what he’s getting. Anything he wants, after being yelled at in front of everyone like that… I wish I could just punch Mark to the ground. Fuck him, making us go out in the storm. He knew that wasn’t going to work and he forced us to do it anyway, just because he can. Just so he can look at me and say, none of this would happen if you’d just agree to let it be ‘Mike and Chester’._

Mike stepped into the bathroom and set his clothes on the vanity. _That’s his plan. Chester says Mark always gets what he wants, one way or another. He’s going to torture us… torture Ches, until I give in._ He clamped his hand over his mouth as the realization set in, closing his eyes against the wave of pain he felt at the thought of Mark hurting Chester, and ultimately taking away from them what little they had left to call their own. Their last little bit of privacy. _There’s just no way out, he’s going to force it until I give in. How much worse can it get before I have to, just to keep Ches safe?_

Back in the bedroom, Chester’s shoulders slumped as he walked over to his suitcase. He hadn’t even had time to unpack all his clothes before he and Mike had been summoned downstairs and tossed out into the rain. He carefully rubbed his wrist, being pretty sure a bruise was on its way, before he crouched down and unzipped his bag. He shuffled things around, looking for his favorite pair of black and silver underwear, the ones that went perfectly with his white t-shirt that had the sparkly silver writing across the front that said, “Zero Fucks Given.” Just as he spotted it, he heard a knock on the door, and he jumped a little as he looked over. _God. I’ve got to pull myself together._ He cleared his throat and hollered, “Come in!”

The door opened and Ryan poked his head in. “Chazzy? You guys decent?” 

“Yeah, come on in, Ry,” Chester said as he stood up, his clothes in hand. 

Ryan stepped in, looked around quickly and shrugged. This room was almost an exact copy of the one he was staying in with Amir. “Where’s Mike?” 

“He’s drawing us a hot bath. I think we’re going to search for bubbles,” Chester said, even though he hadn’t mentioned that part to his boyfriend.

The light flare in Chester’s voice was a relief, and Ryan breathed easier hearing it. “Sounds fun. I just came up to check on you,” he admitted, eyeing his friend up and down. “Mark’s such an asshole.” 

Chester rolled his eyes. “I know. A fucking asshole.” 

“Yes,” Ryan agreed pointing at Chester with a smile. “Very eloquently put. So, you’re okay?” 

Chester waited a second, pondering the question before he said, “Yeah. The thunder, you know? It freaks me out and-” before he could finish his sentence, the thunder showed up, rumbling over top the house like it was going to crush everything under it. Chester jumped, and Ryan was quick to cross the room, laying a hand on his bare shoulder.

“I know, I know,” he said, trying to soothe his friend. “At least it’s over. He shouldn’t have fucking grabbed you like that, and you know, Mark’s always claiming to be so professional, but a professional wouldn’t have had you guys out there like that. It looked awful, Chaz,” he said, dropping his voice. “None of that will show up on film well. Jason’s already said as much. It was raining too hard.” 

Chester nodded. “Figures. He’ll probably make us redo it,” he grumbled before he pushed that away. He didn’t want to think about it. “Anyway. I’m sure everyone got an eye full.” 

“Naw,” Ryan dismissed as he squeezed Chester’s shoulder. “No one cares like that, Chaz. You know that. We all agree every bit of that was Mark’s fault.” 

“You ready, babe?” Mike called, pushing the bedroom door open and stopping short as he watched Ryan drop his hand from Chester’s shoulder. _Don’t make things worse. You were gone less than five minutes. He’s probably just making sure Ches is okay, like that one time… and Ches is leaving here with you._ “Oh. Ryan. What’s up?” He tugged his towel tighter around him, trying to keep his voice level as he looked between the two men. 

“Just wanted to check and make sure you guys were okay,” Ryan said as he stepped away from Chester. “And to let you know that Brad made a list, so me and Jay are going to take off and go do the grocery shopping. He needs to get away from Mark,” he added with a huff. “Anyway, do you guys want anything from the store?” He looked from Mike to Chester. “Chazzy? You want some cheese or beer or something? Mark is having us stop at the liquor store, too.” 

Mike frowned at the mention of the liquor store. “Is bacon on that list? And you know, I know Brad likes to make breakfast, and he frowns on boxed cereal, but it’s a good snack. I want some Cinnamon Toast Crunch. If the list is open for us to just add to,” he amended.

Ryan was already pulling the neatly written shopping list Brad had given him from his pocket. He scanned it quickly. “Bacon. Check,” he said as he read each item quickly. “I need a pen,” he mumbled as he looked up and around before he spotted the desk on the other side of the room. He walked over and snatched a ballpoint pen that was sitting on top a stack of stationary paper. “Okay, Mike, what was that cereal?” he asked as he tried to get the pen to write. 

“Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Ches hates it but it’s like having a bowl full of crunchy cinnamon rolls.” He flashed Chester a quick smile and reached his hand out. “Anything you want, babe? If not, come on. The water is gonna get cold.” 

Chester pointed at the list. “I will take cheese,” he said. “I big fucking block of cheese and some fancy ass rolls or croissants or something to go with it.” He watched as Ryan wrote it down. 

Ryan looked up. “Alright. Anything to drink?” he asked again, since Chester hadn’t mentioned it. 

Chester barely looked Mike’s way before he said, “Sour Bad Apples,” he said, “if you can find them.” 

“Got it,” Ryan said, scribbling down the name of one of Chester’s favorite flavored beers. “Okay, have fun with the bubbles. I’ll bring your stuff up when we get back,” he told them both before he headed out the door, taking the pen with him. 

“Okay,” Mike said, his hand connecting with Chester’s. He wasn’t going to say anything about the beer. If he had his way, Chester would be snuggled up next to him in bed by the time Ryan got back, and cold beer in a warm bed didn’t sound like it went together. “Ready?” he asked, squeezing his boyfriend’s fingers. 

Chester’s eyes were still on the door where Ryan had just left. His whole body felt cold, chilled down to the bone, and he wasn’t sure if a bath was going to fix that. He let out a long sigh before turning to Mike, a weak smile trying to come through. “Yeah, I’m ready,” he answered before he leaned over and popped a soft kiss to Mike’s cheek. He paused for a second, feeling Mike’s body heat as he lingered. “I wish we could wash away memories,” he mumbled. 

Mike closed his eyes. “Me too. If I could do it, I would. Just the ones you wanted to get rid of, though, not the ones of us. Never those.” He pulled Chester into his arms, his fingers rubbing along the top of the towel Chester was still wearing on his hips. “Let’s get warmed up, and then it’s straight into the bed - door locked behind us. Fuck everyone, fuck dinner. I’ll bring you up hot chocolate or coffee or cheese or anything you want, but fuck Mark tonight. They can all eat without us. I don’t care about anything other than you.” He lifted one hand to cup Chester’s cheek and pressed their lips together in a soft kiss. “Just you,” he whispered again. 

Chester’s eyes dropped closed. _Dinner. Mark will be pissed if we skip. I’m not hungry. Fuck it, just like Sexy Boy said._ He popped his eyes open, gazing over his boyfriend’s face, and for the first time in what felt like hours, a real smile came out. Chester went to grab another kiss - a soft kiss that was real and not ordered - just as he heard and felt another round of thunder. His breath hitched in his throat, but he managed not to jump. “I’m ready to go home already,” he deadpanned instead of kissing, his smile gone. “All those storm clouds need to move on before I end up with an ulcer or something.”

Mike smiled indulgently, giving Chester another squeeze close to him before taking his hand to lead him to the bathroom. “I’ve got you. Let’s go. I’m going to make you forget about the rain.” Mike pulled them together out into the hallway, toward the bathroom. _Forget about the rain, forget about the whole day. I hope. I just want to forget this entire day._

****

Jason threw the car in reverse, backing the rented Jaguar down the drive with the use of the backup camera. He kept waiting for Mark to change his mind, to come out of the house, to stop him from leaving with Ryan. But it didn’t happen. At the end of the street, Jason let out a long breath, lifting one hand away from the steering wheel to rub the back of his neck. _I can’t believe it. We’re out of the house. God, what a fucking disaster this afternoon was… I can’t believe Mark. I could just keep driving. We could just… leave. Not come back._

He squinted through the drops of rain hitting the windshield, the brake lights of the car in front of him tinting the water red. He only had a vague idea of where he was going, and hadn’t bothered to put any information into the GPS. _If we get lost, then we get lost. Doesn’t matter. They’re ordering food tonight anyway. It’s not like they need any of this. We can take our time. We can get lost._

A new idea hit him suddenly, a little ball of excitement working its way into his chest. He wasn’t going to waste an opportunity like this to be alone with his lover. He wanted the vision of the boys cowering under Mark’s rage, of Mike struggling to maintain control, of Chester caught in Mark’s grip out of his head. He was with Ryan, he was in his safe place. Now he just needed to find a different type of safe place. 

Ryan hadn’t said anything since they’d gotten in the car, and Jason stretched his arm out to make contact with Ryan’s denim covered thigh. “Ry? You okay?” 

Without looking over, Ryan scrubbed his fingers through his black spiked hair while he looked out the front windshield. “Yeah,” he said before he glanced over, catching Jason’s dark eyes and the worry behind them. “Yeah, no, of course I am,” he added, clearing his throat. He shifted in his seat, trying to get his long legs comfortable. “Just thinking about earlier. Shit like that sits with me sometimes. It’s hard to get it out of my head.”

Jason squeezed his fingers into Ryan’s leg gently. “I know. I don’t have any idea how they put up with it out there in the rain as long as they did. And then for Mark to be so horrible inside…” his voice trailed off as a shiver ran through him. “I couldn’t have filmed if it was you, Ry. I would have lost it and then he’d know. But what he did… it’s just wrong.” 

Ryan leaned over, letting his elbow rest on the middle console, his fingers reaching to pet the shoulder of Jason’s striped polo shirt. “I don’t get why he was being so harsh.” He pursed his lips for a second. “Harsher than usual. And to Chaz,” he said in a higher pitch. “He did that in front of everyone. He’s getting worse,” he decided as he shook his head before he looked over at Jason’s profile. His lover had his eyes straight ahead, on hand on the steering wheel. When they had first starting dating, the topic of Mark was taboo, unless it was Jason letting off steam. With time, however, that barrier had fallen and they had both learned to speak freely about anything and everything. 

“He’s just doing it to get to Mike,” Jason said without thinking. He paused, unsure whether he should go on or not. He knew Ryan and Chester told each other everything. But maybe it wouldn’t be such a bad thing if Ryan shared what Jason was thinking. “You know that video of Mike and Chaz in the piano room? The one they didn’t know we had film of?” He made a right turn and started looking around for an appropriate place to stop the car.

“God, yes,” Ryan growled. His eyes narrowed just at the thought of it, and the repercussions it had brought on Chester and even on Chester’s relationship with Mike. 

“Mark’s cooked up this idea that they should do a whole series like that. And I totally get him, from the business side of things. It would be really lucrative. But the fact that he thinks either of them would do that just blows my mind. He thinks just because he decrees it, it should happen. Apparently Chaz was thinking about it, but Mike flat out said no. Wouldn’t even hear Mark’s offer out.” He made another turn, this time left across a deserted stretch of road. “Not even when Mark said he’d cut their remaining contract time in half.” 

“Wait, wait,” Ryan said, taking his hand from Jason’s shoulder and waving it around. “He already offered this to them? Chaz hasn’t said anything to me about that.” He averted his eyes for a moment, looking at all the expensive upgraded technology on the car’s dash. “Wonder why he didn’t tell me. He’d cut their contracts in half?” he asked, Jason’s last statement hitting him. “So, Chaz would be totally done with YRS in just a year? Since he’s got two left.” 

“He probably didn’t tell you because Mike was pissed. And I don’t blame him. I wouldn’t say yes to that either. I mean, could you imagine, Ry? If someone wanted video of us to sell? Could you say yes to that?” He pulled the car over onto a small paved stretch claiming to be a scenic lookout and put it in park before he looked over at Ryan. “And yeah, he said a year. Which is what got Chaz’s attention. But Mike said no, and you know how Mark is. He wants what he wants. And I think he’s trying to get to Mike through Chaz. Like, the more miserable he can make Chaz, the more likely it is Mike will give in. It’s insane. I’ve never seen him treat Chaz that way.” 

Ryan let out a sigh, his attention drifting out the window at the trees and lake view they could barely see as the sun was all but down and the storm clouds weren’t helping. “He left a bruise on him,” he mumbled. “Not that he hasn’t done that before, just, never in front of everyone. And yelling at him for. . .” the words _not getting hard_ were sitting on Ryan’s tongue, but he didn’t really want to say it. “I can see where just having a year left would be tempting. Even though it would be an awful year. I would never do it, but I’m out of here in a year anyway and -” Ryan gasped as his frown perked up. “Jay,” he said, looking back over at his boyfriend, “if they do that, then Chaz will be able to leave when I do,” he said, pointing to his chest. “And you and Mike, and we could all get out from under Mark together.” 

Jason followed Ryan’s gaze out the passenger side window and sighed. “You guys would all be free,” he mumbled. “Which would be so great, but… you know it’s a little more complicated for me. I can’t just walk out.” He dropped his head and looked at his hands. “I’ve got to start trying to figure that out. How to leave. I’m going to need a hell of a good lawyer.” 

“But, you are going to leave him, right?” Ryan asked before he could stop himself. He reached for Jason’s hand. “I’m sorry,” he stated quickly. “It’s just, we’ve been talking about leaving together and, I, I don’t want to leave you there. Especially if Chaz was gone, too. And Mike. He seems to add some Fuck You balance to the house.” 

“Of course I’m leaving, Ry. I can’t believe we’re even talking about this.” Jason squeezed Ryan’s hand, hard. “You know how he is, I have to make sure that everything is ready when I walk out. That he can’t come after me. You know he’ll try. He’s done it before.” He let the silence stretch between them for a minute before he whispered, “I just want to be able to disappear with you. We have to start planning, Ry. We have to make sure everything is ready.” 

Ryan nodded. He knew Jason was right. He knew they had a lot of things to wrap up. Lots of T’s to cross and I’s to dot. He also knew his lover worried about it. “I don’t know any lawyers,” he said, feeling like he wasn’t being much help. _And how can I be? I don’t know anything about his and Mark’s paper marriage. What belongs to Jay and what belongs to Mark? What can I actually do to help?_ He was about to offer some sort of encouragement before he snapped his fingers, his blue eyes going wide. “You know what? Chaz told me that Mike’s dad is a lawyer. And if he’s anything like Mike, he’s probably a damn good one. Can you imagine Mark coming face to face with Mike’s dad in court?” The smile on Ryan’s face was about to bust as mental images and ideas shot through his mind. 

“Wait, what?” Jason asked. “Why the fuck is Mike doing this if his dad is a lawyer? He could have just gotten Chaz out instead of signing on himself. It doesn’t make any sense.”

“He’s in Colorado,” Ryan offered with a shrug of his shoulders, his great idea suddenly not sounding so plausible. “In fact, Mike wants them to move to Colorado, but Chaz doesn’t want to go. His mom is here and all. And, he hasn’t told me a whole lot, but I think Mike and his dad aren’t on the best of terms. But it can’t be too bad if Mike wants to move there so I don’t know. You’d have to ask him.” 

“Maybe,” Jason said slowly, thinking about what Ryan had just told him. _His dad’s a lawyer. That’s what he meant that day in Mark’s office. Still. I can’t understand why he wouldn’t just get out. There must be something else there._ “I don’t know, Ry, I’m too exhausted to think about all of that right now. Especially with us actually alone for once. I want to forget about Mark.” He leaned over, letting go of Ryan’s hand and petting down the front of his shirt. “Come here.” 

“I’m all for forgetting,” Ryan whispered before he leaned over, letting his lips grasp Jason’s. The rain was tapping over the windows and the roof of the car, and it made for a nice cocoon as they kissed by the illumination of the car’s dash lights. Ryan kept his lips in slow motion, sucking gently on his lover, and placing his hand around Jason’s neck. It wasn’t often they got to take their time to enjoy each other. Usually everything was in a rush. 

Jason felt himself melt into the kiss, twisting his hand into the front of Ryan’s shirt and pulling him as close as they could get with the car console between them. He could smell the rain on his lover’s warm skin as they kissed and he felt his body come alive with anticipation. It was always electric between them, and Jason couldn’t get enough. He touched Ryan’s face gently with his free hand, stroking his fingers reverently down his cheek as he let his tongue come out to play. He felt Ryan sigh into his mouth and he couldn’t help but smile as their lips stayed locked together. 

As the seconds built up, Ryan pulled back, taking a breath before he kissed his lover again. He kept his eyes closed, and it felt nice. So often they kissed with their eyes open, or at least partially open, as they kept their attention alert in case Mark showed up. But Mark wasn’t going to pop out of the backseat of the Jag, and Ryan was ready to relish in it.

He slipped his hand from Jason’s neck, down to the collar of his shirt. He laced his finger just inside of it, feeling his boyfriend’s soft, warm skin and the outline of his collarbone and the little gold chain he always wore. He let Jason’s tongue take control as they kissed, until Ryan was ready to jump across the console and bathe his lover in kisses on every other part of him - his neck and shoulders and stomach and anywhere else he could get to skin. 

Somewhere in all of the kisses and touches the rain had started to come down harder, and the sound of it finally registered in Jason’s ears. He slowly eased back, away from Ryan’s tender, kiss-swollen lips, and leaned their foreheads together as he caught his breath. “Ry,” he whispered, “we have to go to the grocery store. In the fucking rain.”

Ryan’s heart was beating fast, and despite the cramped quarters, his lower half was turned on as well. He knew Jason was right, even though he didn’t like it. “I know. Or we _could_ let them all starve,” he offered as he slowly let go of Jason’s shirt, his body. He let out a deep breath as he looked out at the rain, trying to get everything inside of him to calm down. 

“As tempting as that is, I know you’d never let that happen. Your heart is too big. You care about them. Even Amir,” Jason added, a smile crossing his lips. “I love you. I love your heart.” He tapped the front of Ryan’s shirt before he sat back in the driver’s seat and blew out a long breath, trying to calm down a little. “Let’s see if we can find a grocery store. Maybe I’ll let you push the cart.” 

“Mmmmmm, that sounds sexy,” Ryan said with a smile before he took Jason’s hand and kissed it quickly. “And I love you, too,” he added as he let his boyfriend go so they could be on their way to their appointed task. He settled back in his seat, adjusting his legs and squirming a little in his tight jeans. “You’re probably going to think I’m a dork for saying this, but I’m excited to go to the grocery store with you.” He stopped, feeling a tinge of heat on his cheeks as he shrugged. “It’s something we never get to do. I hate going by myself. I usually just pick up bread and tv dinners, but we get to go shopping for real things to make meals out of. It will be like how life is when we get our own place.”

Jason looked over his left shoulder as he eased the car back onto the road. “I don’t think it’s dorky. You know, I never go to the grocery store. This will be an adventure for both of us.” He chuckled as he thought about them walking the aisles of the store, totally clueless on where to find things. “It’s going to take forever to find everything on Brad’s list.” Once he was comfortable with the car on the road again he reached over to find Ryan’s hand. “But I don’t care. If it takes the rest of the night, at least we’re together.” 

Ryan agreed, and he leaned back in his seat as he kept Jason’s hand in his own. Their conversation turned to more generic topics - the city, the traffic, the few things Ryan had written in on the list, and how nice it would be if they could somehow steal away for at least one evening to have real time together. Running errands wasn’t exactly romantic, even if it was welcomed just the same. 

“There’s a Whole Foods,” Ryan said, as he pointed out the front window. The rain was letting up a little and they’d managed to find themselves in a quieter neighborhood that was full of houses and sporadically placed shops and markets. Ryan tugged on his seatbelt, as Jason pulled into the parking lot. 

The rain let up just enough to not be obnoxious as Jason parked the car and looked over at Ryan. “You got the list? Don’t let it get wet. If we go back without something on Brad’s list he’ll probably decide that the end of the world is nearing or something catastrophic. Here, maybe you should let me have it.” Jason held his hand out expectantly. 

“Don’t worry, I got it,” Ryan objected. “It’s in my pocket.” He patted his jeans before he said, “If we run, we might not get soaked. We should have stolen Mark’s big umbrella.”

Jason snorted. “I don’t want anything of his.” He took one more look at his lover, then put his hand on the door handle. “Okay. On the count of three, we’re out of here. Then run like hell, okay?” He saw Ryan nod, and he counted them down. “One… two… three!”

They were both out of the car in a flash, splashing through the rain filled puddles in the parking lot as they ran to the front of the grocery store. Jason didn’t even look back until he was safely under the overhang, a huge grin on his face as he turned and caught Ryan by the waist. “You’re right, it wasn’t totally awful!” he exclaimed, laughing, his hair wet and sticking to his forehead as he hauled Ryan in for a sloppy, wet kiss. 

It wasn’t fair. With time ticking down, Ryan knew he and Jason couldn’t spend too much time, kissing in the rain. He made sure to pull his lover up against his body and to drop a hand to one of Jason’s round ass cheeks, giving it a healthy squeeze before they pulled apart. “Damn,” Ryan breathed with a smile. “It’s so awesome to be able to do that. To kiss you and touch you and right out here in the open.” He barely glanced around before his eyes settled back on Jason. “Even soaking wet, you’re so handsome.” He slid one finger up and across Jason’s wet forehead, pushing his dark hair out of the way. 

Jason caught Ryan’s hand and kissed his wrist before letting go and waving his hand toward the front door. “Come on. The faster we do this shopping, the more we can kiss. Or… maybe every time you find something on the list I’ll just kiss you anyway. Right out here in the world.” He led the way to the carts, plucking one from the row and heading inside. 

Ryan put on hand on the handle of the shopping cart as they walked squished together. “I thought I was going to get to push the cart,” he complained as he leaned over and pecked his lips to Jason’s neck. 

“But you have the list. You don’t get the list and the cart,” Jason replied. “One or the other, but not both. You have to share the fun.” 

It wasn’t a hard choice. “Fine. I’m keeping the list,” Ryan decided as he let go of the cart and pulled Brad’s neatly written requests from his pocket, along with the stolen pen from Chester and Mike’s room. “First off is eggs, bacon, butter, and sausage,” he read out loud before he slid his hand around Jason’s waist, walking with him. “He has those blocked off together, so they must be together in the store?” he asked, looking around at the all the shelves. He couldn’t even remember when was the last time he’d actually bought eggs or sausage and for half a second he wished Chester was with them. _He’s an excellent shopper; he practically lives at the grocery store, always buying stuff for his home-cooked banquets. But that would totally ruin this._ He quirked an eyebrow as he twisted his hand enough to drum his fingers just over the top of his boyfriend’s ass. 

“I think so… but maybe we should get the not cold stuff first?” Jason wondered aloud, looking over at the list. “I don’t know. We’re going to be the most inefficient shoppers ever. And is milk on that list? Isn’t that by the eggs and stuff?” He started toward the far corner of the store, where he could see yogurt and butter lined up in cold shelving.

Ryan checked the list. “Yes!” he said a little too excitedly and he quickly looked around as he laughed. A few people had looked their way, but he didn’t care. He cleared his throat. “I mean, yes. It must be down there.” They headed for the coolers, and Ryan was ready with the pen to mark off every item they found successfully, like it was a treasure hunt. 

Jason let Ryan read items off the list, and he retrieved them and put them in the cart, lining things up neatly to maximize the space they had available. Every so often he would stop and kiss Ryan’s ear, or his cheek, or the back of his neck. It was refreshingly normal to be working their way down a grocery list, and he was enjoying every second of it, even when they had to double back through aisles they had already been down because of forgotten items. The next time they stopped to look over the list, Jason slid his hand into the back pocket of Ryan’s jeans and leaned his head against his lover’s shoulder. “How much more do we have, Ry?”

“Not much,” Ryan deadpanned. “Then we’ll have to go back. We still need to get Mike’s cereal,” he said, squinting his eyes at his own scribbles. “And the liquor list Mark gave us. . .you have that, don’t you?” he asked as they stood in front of a display of canned tomato soup. 

“Yeah, I’ve got it,” Jason sighed, straightening up and looking down into the cart. “This was fun, you know.” He waved his hand over the groceries and bumped his hip into Ryan’s playfully. “Just think, one day we’ll get to do this every Sunday afternoon. It will be Ryan and Jason’s weekly grocery store time. We’ll have a list and it will be in order of the aisles at our favorite grocery store, and we’ll get to just be normal.” It really felt tangible, right there in that moment, standing in Whole Foods. Jason could picture it clearly and he wanted it to be his reality. 

“I think that sounds wonderful,” Ryan replied before he nuzzled his face to Jason’s cheek. “I can’t wait till we have all the routines. We can have a schedule for shopping,” he said, plopping a kiss to Jason’s skin. “And one for dishes.” Kiss. “One for laundry.” Kiss. “One for meals and bedtime and a weekly date night. Maybe two weekly date nights.” He kissed his cheek one last time before he made himself stop. Thoughts of the future with Jason were nice - captivating - but Ryan knew it could go too far, and after all, they were in public. 

He looked away from his lover and signaled for them to get going. “Cereal,” he said, pointing up to the overhead signs, spotting the one for the breakfast food aisle. 

“Let’s go,” Jason said, his thoughts far away from cereal. They made their way over to the aisle, and he was scanning the boxes for Mike’s selection, but he wasn’t really seeing any of it. He was imagining a place where he and Ryan were truly alone, where they could have all the little routines that normal people had. _Normal. I keep coming back to that word. We’d just be normal, regular people. A couple who switched off on cooking nights and laundry nights. Argue over whose turn it is to do the dishes. Laundry and socks and taking the dog for a walk. I don’t do any of those things now. I don’t even have a dog._ He looked over at Ryan, who had found the box of sugary cereal before he did. “Ry? Do you want a dog?” He flushed a little at his random sounding question. “I mean, I was just thinking…” 

“I, well I like dogs,” Ryan admitted without issue, the box of Cinnamon Toast Crunch in his hands. “But I don’t think they sell them at grocery stores.” It took a second, and the look on Jason’s face before Ryan busted into the laughter. “Oh, you mean when we have our own place, don’t you?” He had to lean over as he laughed again. “Sorry,” he giggled. “Um, yeah. Definitely,” he decided as he dropped the box of cereal into the cart. “I’d love to have a dog. Something big but friendly. Well, not too big. I just don’t want a purse dog.” 

“No, no little dogs,” Jason agreed, turning the cart toward the check-out lines. “I was just thinking of all the things we’d get to have together, and I can’t wait.” He flashed Ryan a smile. “I’m going to make you the best husband ever.” 

He stopped, his eyes wide as he realized what he’d said. They’d never really discussed long term plans like marriage. Everything stopped in the immediate future, right after they were finally free from YRS. There was just something so comfortable about being together that made him open his mouth and _assume_ that Ryan wanted to be with him that way. He shook his head. “Sorry, I.. I’m getting a little carried away, huh?” he whispered. 

“Don’t be sorry,” Ryan assured him, his arm going around Jason’s side. “I’m open to marriage. . .with you. Not right away, but, Jay, I think it would suit us. Husbands,” he said with a hum, pictures of a make believe future flooding through his mind. They’d have a small ceremony. Just close friends and what little family the two of them could scrounge up. It would be a ceremony of the heart, not of flash and ego. “I like the sound of that.” He pulled Jason a little closer before he let him go. “I’m actually relieved to hear you bring it up. I kinda thought, you know, that you’d have a bad taste in your mouth for marriage after what you’ve been through.” 

Jason nodded. “But with you, it’s just different. Everything is different with you.” He looked away for a second, trying to find words to describe what he was feeling. “I’ll try to explain later,” he finally decided. “I don’t think standing in the grocery line is the right place for this.” He glanced over at the list, where Ryan had checked each item off. “We got it all, it looks like. Time for the liquor store, then back to reality.” 

****  
An hour later and the expensive rental car was stuffed full of groceries and liquor. Ryan had two grocery bags crammed around his feet, but he didn’t care. He and Jason had run through a fast food place, and gotten salty french fries and cheeseburgers. Their burgers were gone, but Ryan was enjoying hand feeding Jason his share of the fries. “Ready for another one?” he asked, getting one of the long yellow potato shards ready. 

“Yep,” Jason answered, keeping his eyes on the road as he turned his head toward Ryan. “I think they taste better when you’re feeding them to me,” he added, opening his mouth. 

Ryan was quick to please, carefully placing the french fry right in Jason’s mouth. “I never thought it would be so much fun feeding you,” he laughed. “Guess that’s something else we need to add to our routine list for the future. I’ll feed you, you can feed me.” He smiled at Jason before he took a fry for himself, the salt and pepper hitting his tongue in the most delightful way. He had to lick his lips to get as much stray salt from them as possible. 

Jason smiled around a mouthful of potatoey goodness. “We need to start keeping a list,” he said. “We’re going to have to take a year off work just to get started on all the things we want to do together.” He navigated his way back to the rented house, only making one wrong turn that required a u-turn that he carefully executed to head the correct direction. The closer they got to the house, the less relaxed, the less happy he felt. He wanted the way he felt when he was with Ryan to last forever. 

“We should make a list,” Ryan agreed before he took another french fry and offered it to Jason. “If we make a list of possible places to move though, I say we don’t even consider Seattle.” A frown crossed his face as thunder clapped overhead. “It rains here way too much.” 

“Agreed. I love LA. The weather is great.” Jason leaned and caught the fry in his mouth, chewing and swallowing before he continued, “but I want to be as far away from Mark as we can afford to get. I don’t even want there to be a chance we’d run into him anywhere.” He took his foot off the gas slightly and let the car slow down. There were only two more turns to the house. 

“I’m all in for leaving the city just to avoid him,” Ryan stated. “Once we’re together, I don’t want him lurking around. We’ll be totally done with him.” He pushed air from his nose as thoughts of Mark slithered into his mind. _No more Mark. Not professionally or personally. It’s going to be great._

Jason pulled the car to the next stop sign, and Ryan looked out the front window at the choice of directions. There were only two. If they went right, they would be back to the rented house in just a minute or two. But if they turned left, they would be headed back to the city. “You know,” Ryan said softly, “it would be so easy to go that way instead.” He nodded toward the road to the left. “We could just keep going. . .never come back.” 

_It would be easy to just drive away. Nothing, just a car full of groceries with us. We could stop and buy a few things and just drive to the other side of the country. I wonder how far we would get before he came looking for us. I wonder how long it would take for him to cancel my credit cards and leave me with nothing. I wonder how much money Ry has saved._ Jason sighed as he hesitated, looking over at what he could see of Ryan’s face in the dim light of the street lamp. It was so tempting to just say fuck it and go. He didn’t need Mark’s money. They could make it without all of that. He’d grown up so incredibly average it was crazy to think about it now that he had everything he wanted at his fingertips. Everything but Ryan. 

“You know we can’t do that,” he said finally, his voice thick with emotion. “As much as I want to, Ry, we have to be careful. Plan it out. We can’t just leave like this.” Jason glanced out the windows before he leaned over to place a soft kiss on Ryan sad looking lips. “I love you, and we’re going to leave and get a dog and have our own place, soon. One more year, okay?” 

Ryan nodded. “One more year,” he agreed, even though he hated it. “We’ll make it. I know we will.” 

Jason nodded back, then carefully turned the car to the right, the weight of returning to the house, to Mark, settling in the silence between them. 

****  
TBC


	40. Seattle Part Three: A Forced Night Out

Mark stood in front of the full-length mirror, adjusting the collar on his beige dress shirt. He straightened out the front, pressing his hands down his chest and then his stomach, fidgeting with his brown Italian style belt that had the gold buckle before he turned around. His attention went right to Jason, who was slumped on the bed, his head down as he stared at his polished black shoes. “You don’t look excited to go out,” Mark commented as he turned back to the mirror on the inside of the walk-in closet door. He slicked a hand over his dark hair and smiled. “This club we’re going to is supposed to be a Seattle hot spot. If we can find some new talent, I think it’s worth the effort.” He stepped back and closed the door, looking back toward the bed. “Jason? Did you hear me?.” 

“I heard you,” Jason responded, his voice coming across dull. He reached to cover the side of his head, one eye, with his hand as he said, “I’m sure it’s going to be loud. And I’ve got what feels like the beginning of a migraine.” He didn’t look up to see Mark’s reaction. He knew his husband would be annoyed with him, but his headaches weren’t something he could control. Once he felt one coming on, he was useless for the rest of the day. 

Mark stood just in front of him, his hands on his hips. “These headaches of yours seem to be getting worse,” he said, thinking back to all the times when plans were cancelled or changed last minute when a migraine would show up. It had left Mark going out on his own more and more lately. “Maybe you should see the doctor when we get back,” he suggested, with a small gruff in his voice. 

“Do you think you could get me a glass of water, hon?” Jason asked, peeking over at Mark. “Maybe if I can just lay down for a bit I’ll feel better. And you’re right… I should probably see someone about these. They’re awful.” He sighed, kicking his shoes off and scooting up on the bed. 

Mark’s gray eyes narrowed. Jason lying down and taking off his shoes all equalled one thing: he wasn’t going to be up for the club. “Yeah, I’ll get you some water,” he said, his voice trailing off as he rubbed the back of his neck in frustration. “Alright, just stay here. Maybe I can get one of the boys to go with me. Chaz will go. Or Ryan,” he suggested as likable people filtered through his mind. “Everyone else is underage, more or less,” he decided before he spun around to head toward the door. 

“The lights,” Jason called weakly, putting his arm over his eyes. He didn’t say anything else as he heard Mark flip off the overhead light and leave the room. _Fuck. He better not drag Ryan out. Sorry for Mike, but Chaz has to go. He won’t say no. He doesn’t say no to Mark. I hope Ryan’s somewhere else._

Mark fiddled with the button cuffs of his shirt as he walked out into the living space. He quickly scanned the room, eyeing his employees. Other than Caleb, they all seemed to be present. Chester was sitting on one of the barstools at the kitchen counter, carefully slicing up pieces of marble cheese and placing each one on crackers. Mike was next to him, stuffing his face with cereal and Mark rolled his eyes. He headed their way, ready to lay on the sweet, honey-covered words he knew got to Chester the easiest. Their first shoot the day before out in the rain had gone badly, but since then they’d managed to do a sexy scene in front of the fireplace, one that Mark and Jason had both agreed would be a fan favorite, so all seemed to be well and back in order. 

“Boys,” Mark said as he strode up to the tall countertop. “Enjoying the food?” he asked, his eyes flipping from Mike’s bowl of cold cereal to Chester’s neatly stacked cheese and crackers.

Chester looked up from his miniature cheese cutting board to see Mark standing a few feet away. The fireplace was on in the living room, and it was giving his boss an odd backlighted glow. “Fine,” Chester answered. “Just making a snack.” 

Mike nodded, his mouth full of cereal. It was a guilty pleasure of his, and one he usually only indulged in at home. But Brad was busy with dinner preparations, and he needed food. Besides, Chester had cheese and crackers, so it was the perfect opportunity for a little Cinnamon Toast Crunch. 

“It looks good,” Mark offered with a smile. He glanced into the kitchen; Brad was standing at the stove, a gray oven mitt on his hand as he stared at the belly of the stove. Mark took a quick whiff of the air, and he knew it was a roast his cousin was watching so closely. “Anyway,” he said, turning back to his employees. “Jason’s come down with a headache, and we were supposed to go out to the club tonight to look for new talent.” He took a step closer, leaning one elbow on the counter. “Chaz, I was thinking maybe you’d go with me, since Jason is out of commission for the evening.” 

Chester’s eyes went a little wide as he pointed to himself. “Me?” he asked, before he looked over at Mike and then back at his boss. “To a club?” 

“Come on, Chaz, don’t act so surprised,” Mark said with a little wave of his hand. “You and I have gone out together lots of times. You’re better company than most of these guys,” he added, lowering his voice and throwing on an angelic smile. 

Mike stiffened in his seat, eyeing Mark with irritation. Things were just starting to be okay after the rain disaster, and now Mark wanted to go clubbing. He didn’t even think before he blurted out, “if Chester’s going, I’m going too.”

Mark’s eyes flipped over to Mike, and he had to force himself not to laugh. “Oh, I’m sorry, Mike,” he said, keeping his voice smooth as silk, “but you’re underage. You can’t go. Chazzy turned twenty-one, so run upstairs and get ready, okay?” he asked, stepping close enough to gently pat Chester’s shoulder for a second. 

Chester looked from his boss to Mike, the pit of his stomach feeling uneasy. “Yeah, but, Mark, I don’t know how to pick out talent.” He shook his head. “Why not wait til Jason feels better?” 

“Because I’m already dressed and in the mindset to go tonight,” Mark argued lightly. “Just go put on something nice. Something other than pajama bottoms,” he said, flipping his fingers toward Chester’s cotton joggers. “Come on. You love going out, and besides, you’ve been in this business long enough. You know what we’re looking for. You know what our fans want, so actually, I think you’re a great candidate. And it will be good practice for when you finally get on the other side of the camera.” He offered Chester a quick wink and softened his eyes as best he could to something innocent and pleading, knowing it would work. 

The room seemed to be collectively holding their breath as they glanced from Mark to Mike, waiting for Mike’s reaction. Mike watched as Chester looked from their boss, down to his block of cheese, then over to lock eyes with him. He could see very plainly that Chester didn’t want to go, but he could also see that his boyfriend wasn’t going to say no. It was a situation that Mike could let blow up or he could keep himself under control, and he pushed his cereal bowl away as thoughts bombarded him. _If I say something, we’ll end up back in the rain. And Ches can’t handle the rain. Yesterday was fine, and he’s fine. And it’s a club, a public place, surely Mark wouldn’t be stupid enough to try again with him out in public. But what if he does? And I’m not there? But how can I get Ches to say no? He’s looking at me with those eyes. Damn it. Damn it!_

Without looking away from Chester, Mike asked, “well, who else is going? If you’re looking for new people, seems like more eyes would be an advantage.” If he couldn’t go, someone else had to. There was safety in numbers, maybe. Maybe Ryan would go. _Ryan. Fuck. Though in this situation, I’d welcome it. Anyone between Mark and Ches is fine with me right now._

Mark straightened up a little. He’d half expected Mike to throw a fit, and he was rather relieved to finally see him rolling over on his belly and accepting what was going to happen instead. “That’s a nice thought, Mike,” he said. “But most of everyone here is like you - underage. Chazzy and I will be fine.” He patted Chester on the shoulder again. “Go get ready,” he encouraged. 

Chester nodded before he stood up. He looked at Mike, not missing the concern in his dark eyes. “You can have my cheese,” he offered before he stepped behind Mike and wrapped his arms around his neck. He kissed the side of his face. “We won’t stay out long. I’ll be fine.” 

“Okay, okay,” Mark said, waving a hand at the couple. “Jesus, you two. You act like you can’t be apart from one another for one night. Chaz, come on. Time is ticking.” He pointed at his watch as he waited. 

Mark’s words only caused Mike to turn and catch Chester’s face between both hands, looking straight into his eyes before he kissed him full on, letting their lips mesh together in front of everyone. He was obviously marking his territory, but Chester didn’t seem to mind.

“You two can make out when we get back,” Mark whined, making sure to keep his voice as light as possible. Turning on his authority would send Chester into his shell, and that would make him a deplorable companion at a club. It was much easier to get him to do what he wanted by laying on the charm and promises instead. “Put on some nice hip hugging jeans, Chaz,” Mark said before he headed across the room. “And hurry!” 

Chester let out a sigh, his mind racing over his limited wardrobe just as Ryan came into view. He looked from Mike to Ryan, deciding that if he had to go out without Mike by his side, Ryan would be a good second choice. Ryan could handle Mark’s bullshit and help play defense when Mark had one too many drinks - all stuff he didn’t want to express to Mike. It would just make him worry. “Hey, Ry,” Chester called as he squeezed Mike’s hand before he let him go and took a step toward his coworker. “Me and Mark are going to the club to scope for new talent since Jason’s got a headache. You want to go with us?” he asked, making sure not to look Mark’s way. 

Ryan stopped, his attention shooting from Chester to Mark and back. “You’re going instead of Jason?” he asked, pointing at his coworker. _Damn. I didn’t figure Mark would make Chaz go. Why did this have to get complicated. I want to stay here with Jason. That was the plan._ He looked over at Mark, his mouth dropping open as his thoughts rushed. He knew Chester going out with the boss alone was a recipe for disaster, but he didn’t want to miss the chance to have a night in with Jason either. “I, well,” he stammered before he looked across the room and spotted Amir. His blue eyes instantly went on pleading mode. Amir was old enough to go, and Ryan knew he’d be a good buffer between Mark and Chester. 

As soon as Ryan’s eyes caught his, Amir zeroed in on the complete picture. _Mark is an idiot if he can’t see Jason and Ryan are setting this up to be alone. What a dumbass. And here’s Chaz, caught in the middle. Mike looks like he’s about to blow a fuse. Which would be funny, except that Mark would probably back hand him. Which isn’t funny. I’m actually impressed he’s holding it together. Maybe he’s learning something finally. I tried to tell Ryan, this is what happens when you get emotionally attached to people at work. When you start to care about anyone, that’s when everything gets fucked._ He stood up from where he’d been sitting in the living room, reaching for the wrapper to the Twix he’d already eaten. With as much excitement as he could fake, he sucked it up and volunteered, “I’ll go. I need to get out of this fucking place. This rain makes it feel like a goddamn prison.” He shot Ryan a glance that definitely read - _you owe me_.

Mark glared from Amir over to Ryan, watching the two of them. _That makes no sense. Chester asked Ryan to go. Ryan always does what Chester asks, like he’s a puppy or something._ It didn’t set right with him, but as he looked at the time again, he decided to let it go for now. “Alright, fine,” he said, tossing his hands in the air. “I’m going to give you both ten minutes to get ready and meet me out in the car,” he decided before he spun to leave, but he stopped. “Oh, and Mike? Take Jason a glass of water, will you?” He didn’t wait for an answer. He spun on his heels and seconds later he was gone, out the door and headed to the Jag to get it warmed up.

Chester let out a sigh of relief as he smiled to Amir. “Guess we’re the lucky ones tonight,” he said, before heading for the stairs. He rubbed his bare arms, as he made up his mind over what he would wear. He had a nice pair of jeans that would pass Mark’s inspection and then an orange long sleeved shirt. It would hide his tattoos and make him blend more into the crowd once they got there, which was exactly what he wanted. 

Amir watched Mike scramble up from his seat to follow Chester, noting that he did not have a glass of water in his hand. He made sure Mark was out the door before he turned to Ryan, his voice low. “You’re welcome. _Fuck._ This is the last fucking thing I want to do tonight.” He scowled at Ryan and flipped both hands out. “I’ll be deflecting questions about your dumb ass all night, you know. You two better fucking be careful.” 

Ryan shook his head. “We never figured he’d drag Chaz into this. He usually just goes out by himself,” he stated before letting out a long breath, his eyes drifting toward the stairs where Chester and Mike had already disappeared. “Thanks,” he said, looking back at Amir. “I mean it. Thanks. I do owe you. Keep an eye on Chazzy, alright? And if Mark says anything about me and Jay, just deny it.” 

“I’m not stupid,” Amir said, shaking his head. “You better take Jason that glass of water. Actually, you should wait until we’re gone.” He turned on his heel for the stairs, calling over his shoulder, “I’ll text you when we leave the club.” 

Mike heard Amir calling to Ryan as he and Chester made it to their room, and the reality of what was happening hit him in the face. “Oh. _Oh._ Ryan’s staying because Jason’s staying. That’s how this happened. That sucks.” He sat down on the end of the bed and watched Chester as he stripped off the shirt and pajama pants he was wearing. 

“Yeah, it took me a minute to catch it, too,” Chester admitted as he tossed his clothes on the bed and walked over to the closet. “I actually thought Jay had a headache until Ry gave me that look and then it was like, duh.” He chuckled a little as he took the orange shirt from the closet. He pulled it over his head, tugging it down and messing with the sleeves before he looked over at Mike sitting so defeated on the bed. “Don’t worry, Sexy Boy,” he offered. “We’re going to a club. Mark’s not going to be looking at me and Amir. He’s going to be on the prowl. Jason’s told me about how these head hunts go.” 

“I don’t want you to go at all,” Mike mumbled. “At least someone else will be there. Even if it is Amir. You’ll have your phone, you let me know if you need me. I’ll figure out how to get there if you need me, okay?” He dropped his head and covered his eyes. “This is not how I thought tonight was gonna go.” 

Chester pulled on his jeans, one leg at a time before he decided he needed a belt. “Me either,” he offered as he looked Mike’s way. “I was looking forward to eating Brad’s roast and smothering it all in ketchup.” He stopped, his eyes going to a far off place as he imagined all the ketchup. He licked his lips. “Anyway,” he said, shaking away the thought, “it sucks, but like I said, we shouldn’t be out long. Hopefully.” He had to laugh a little. “Especially with Amir being there, he’ll probably annoy Mark into wanting to leave before we’re there for too long.” He waited, expecting to get a smile from his boyfriend, but it wasn’t happening. Chester headed to the bed instead of grabbing his belt and shoes from the closet. “And hey,” he whispered as he climbed behind his lover and leaned against his back, “I’m proud of you for keeping your cool through all that. It’s for the best, you know.” He picked his head up enough to kiss Mike’s shoulder. 

“I know,” Mike whispered, his stomach hurting. “Just be careful, Ches. Especially with the alcohol. I know how he is. He’ll just keep putting them in your hand.” It was the first time since he’d signed on at YRS that Chester would be alone in Mark’s company for any length of time, and Mike knew he wouldn’t be at ease until Chester was back. He had no idea what he was going to even do while they were gone. There was no piano, nothing to distract himself with. And with Jason and Ryan occupied, his options were Devon, Noah, and Caleb, or Brad. 

Chester shut his eyes as he considered the advice. _He’s right. I’ve gotta watch how much I drink. I know Mark will make us. He always insists._ “I’ll be careful,” he promised as he kissed Mike’s shoulder again and then stood up to head back to the closet. “He’ll make me get a drink, but I’ll sip it and make it last the whole time,” he decided as he took his belt and threaded it through the waist of his jeans. “And make sure Brad saves me a big piece of roast and some of the red potatoes he’s cooking,” he begged. “I’ll be starving by the time we get back.” 

Mike nodded his head, watching Chester finish getting dressed. “Try not to look so hot,” he offered, sweeping his hand up and down Chester’s frame. “It’s not fair.”

Chester looked down at himself before he said, “Mike, this is the most generic thing I could possibly be wearing. And if anyone tries to hit on me, I’ll be ready with my phone.” He pulled the device from where he’d already stuck it in his pocket. He hit the home button, just to get the screensaver to pull up. “See?” he said, a goofy smile on his face as he flashed it in front of Mike, even though he knew his lover already knew the cheesy picture of the two of them kissing was there. 

“Can’t help it. I always think you look hot. I have since the first time I saw you at Joe’s.” Mike inspected the phone screensaver. “I love you. I’ll be right here when you get home. There’s only so much togetherness I can tolerate with everyone else.” He tried to smile at Chester, but he knew it fell short. “I guess I’ll walk down with you.”

Chester held out his hand, pulling Mike to his feet. “Thanks for the compliment,” he said, nuzzling his lips to Mike’s warm neck. “And you should go down and join the others. Sitting up here will just make it worse.” He tugged on Mike’s hand, getting him to walk toward the door. “And you know, they’re not bad guys once you get to know them. And Ry and Jay are here.” 

Mike snorted. “Yeah, I guarantee once you guys leave, we won’t see them until Amir lets Ryan know you’re on your way back. And I can’t say I blame them. I’d be the same way if it was me and you. I just wish you hadn’t gotten sucked in.” They walked down the stairs hand in hand, MIke squeezing Chester’s hand a little bit tighter the closer they got to the bottom. It was going to be hard to let him go. 

****

Ryan stepped into the kitchen to grab a glass of water for Jason. He glanced toward the stairs, his thoughts falling over Chester and Amir, and how their evening was about to really suck. _At least neither of them are going to be stuck alone with Mark._ Just thinking his boss’ name at the moment made him grip the cool glass of water a little tighter. He could hear some of the others behind him, and he caught words here and there. He was pretty sure all of them knew why he hadn’t jumped at Chester’s invitation. 

He turned around, avoiding eye contact with the lot of them to head down the hall. _Chaz will be fine. Mike will worry himself to death, but Chaz will be fine. And Amir will let us know when our time is up. It’s almost perfect, in a way. If Mark went on his own, we’d have to guess, but now. . .now we’ll have plenty of warning._ The thought was enough to bring a smile to his lips as he stepped up to the closed master bedroom door. He raised his knuckles to knock on instinct, but stopped himself. He knew Jason was in there, waiting for him to show up. 

Ryan took a quick peek over his shoulder before he turned the door handle and stepped in. The lights were off, leaving the room in shadows, the only light coming in through the span of windows on the far wall from the sun that wasn’t all the way down just yet, and the meager light from the hallway. “Jay?” Ryan called softly as he took a step or two toward the bed. The plan was for his lover to fake a headache in hopes of getting an evening alone without their tyrant. But as Ryan squinted his eyes to see through the dim light, Jason was actually lying on the bed. He had his arm over his eyes, his face skewed like he was in pain. Like all of this was real. 

Jason lowered his arm as soon as he heard Ryan’s voice, his lips breaking into a soft smile. “Ry? Are they gone?” He pushed himself up on both elbows and tried to see Ryan before he rolled to the side and clicked on the lamp next to him. A soft amber glow illuminated the space around him and he glanced back at Ryan. “Aw, you brought me water.”

“They’re not gone yet,” Ryan told him before he walked over to the bed. “Mark’s already out in the car. Chaz and Amir are getting ready. They’ll be out of here in a few minutes.” He offered Jason the water with a soft smile. “Mark said you needed this.” 

“I’ll take it.” Jason reached for the glass, but didn’t take a drink. “Should I turn the light back off? Do you think he’ll come back inside?” His eyebrows creased into a frown and he felt his pulse quicken. They were so close to being alone, he didn’t want to ruin it. 

Ryan looked back toward the open doorway, and a second later he was headed for it. “No, I’ll just wait over here till I hear them leave,” he decided. He looked down the hallway, spying some of the other boys milling around. “I’m sure we’ll hear something from Amir as he’s walking out the door. Maybe even something from Chazzy. They both like to talk,” he stated before he turned around, leaned against the door frame and crossed his arms over his snug fitting black t-shirt, like he was standing guard. 

Jason’s eyes travelled up Ryan’s backside, lingering for a few seconds on his denim clad ass, thinking about how good it was going to feel to have his hands on his lover again. It felt like it had been forever since they’d been together. He dragged his gaze over Ryan’s back, up his neck, and admired the crisp line of his haircut at the nape of his neck. He set the glass of water on the table and tried to scoot quietly off the bed, ready to sneak up behind Ryan and drop kisses on the skin between his dark hair and the collar of his shirt. 

His sock covered feet hit the floor and he crept over to Ryan, looking past him into the hallway before he reached to stroke one hand right down his spine, leaning forward to breathe warm air against the back of his neck. He wet his lips and pecked one soft kiss on Ryan’s neck. “They need to hurry,” he whispered. 

The moment Ryan felt Jason’s kiss to his neck, he leaned back a little. “I know,” he agreed, keeping his voice low. “What should we do first? We’ve got time. We can make a plan.” 

“A plan?” Jason giggled quietly. “A plan? I spend all day every day making plans. I don’t have a plan. All I know is I want you so badly I can already taste you. My mouth is watering just thinking about you.” He quickly licked the bottom of Ryan’s earlobe and nuzzled his nose into the little space behind his ear. “But if _you_ need a plan, I’m ready. I’m ready for whatever you have in mind. I’m ready to take my time and savor you like my favorite dessert.” 

Ryan grinned as he reached one arm behind his back, blindly groping for Jason - or Jason’s ass - depending on what he could reach without turning around and away from the hall. “We can wing it. Or we can come up with something. I just thought if you had any requests, we could make sure it’s on our list.” He chuckled lightly. “Not that we have a list. We usually have to rush everything.” He went to say more but stopped, his posture straightening slightly as he heard Amir’s voice. 

“Damn, Chaz, let’s go! Mike will survive the next two hours without you!” Amir was yelling loud enough for people the next street over to hear him. 

Jason couldn’t bring himself to feel bad. _Mike and Chaz always get to be together. Always. Amir’s right, Mike will survive. This is our time right now._ He slid his hands around Ryan’s waist, feeling over his abs and the soft t-shirt covering them. “Let’s wait until we hear the door close. Then I’m starting with this shirt. This shirt has to go.” 

Ryan’s impulse was to yank the shirt off right there and then. His free hand actually went to the bottom hem, but he stopped himself. It would be sexier if Jason took it off for him. “Okay, my shirt will be all yours,” he said from the corner of his mouth as he kept his eyes straight ahead. “But then I get to take off yours and. . .” he paused, as he watched Chester walk by on his way to the front door, the younger man’s bright orange shirt clicking something in Ryan’s mind. “Jay? I don’t think I’ve ever asked you before, but, uh, what do you think of food in bed? Sexy food. . .chocolate syrup and stuff.” 

The thought hit Jason’s brain out of nowhere. “I… I don’t know where any spare sheets are,” he said finally, turning to look at the bed. He knew Mark would notice if the sheets were different. “And I don’t think chocolate syrup is something recommended to help with migraines. I think Brad would say something.” He paused. “Did we even buy chocolate syrup the other night?

Ryan heard the front door close, and he turned around. A short gasp escaped him the moment he saw Jason’s dark eyes shining by the light of the hallway, and how his nose was scrunched up as he tried to remember what they’d gotten at the grocery store. “I don’t know,” Ryan hummed, lacing his arms around Jason’s waist. “Oh well, it was just a thought. They’re gone,” he whispered before he leaned forward, his eyes closing as he brought their lips together for a short kiss. And then another. “We need to close this door,” he mumbled between lip locks. 

“Mmm, lock it,” Jason panted, his hands not leaving Ryan’s shirt. “Fast. Or, not fast. We’ve got time.” He smiled slowly, taking a step back and catching his breath. “We’ve got _time_.”

****

The music in the club was loud enough to send vibrations through Chester’s legs as he followed behind Mark, a vodka martini in his hand. He glanced out to the dance floor, but all he could make out was a sea of young men, all dressed to impress. Some were in more conservative attire - tight fitting jeans and high cut shirts, while others went for a more flamboyant look with pinks and yellows, or shirtless. 

A part of Chester missed the club scene. He enjoyed dancing and mingling, but he also knew that too much of either usually lead to flirting and good times in bathrooms and back rooms, which wasn’t his lifestyle anymore. Immediately his thoughts turned to Mike as they shuffled their way over to a high-top round stone table close to the dance floor. _I wonder what he’s going to do all night? It feels weird to be out without him. Not that he likes clubs. . .he’d really hate this. I can’t believe I used to come to these places all the time. Life is so much quieter now. Better._ He took his seat between Amir and Mark, setting his drink on the table. 

Amir leaned back in his seat, his fingers curled around the stem of his fruity drink as he glanced around the room. There was a huge pineapple wedge sticking out of his glass, and an umbrella, and Mark had scowled when he ordered the flamboyantly named Sex on the Beach. Part of him did it just to annoy Mark, but the other part of him secretly enjoyed the sweeter drinks more than anything else he’d tried. “What a scene,” he remarked, sliding the fingers of his free hand along the seam of his tight black jeans.

“There’s places like this in L.A.,” Chester offered as he took a sip of his drink, the alcohol hitting his tongue and he sighed in delight for a second before he sat it back down. “I’ve been to almost fucking all of them.” 

Mark’s attention flipped from the dance floor to his top model. “That’s what I like to hear, Chaz. I knew your experience would be good for this. Now, boys,” he said, as he twisted around to see them both a little better. “We are here on work.” He scooted his frosted full beer mug off to the side of the stone table to move his hands around in front of him. “We’re looking for new talent. So keep your eyes open for a good body,” he stated, listing things off on his fingers, “bright eyes - and by bright I mean healthy, a good personality and someone who isn’t bashful or afraid to have fun. We don’t need anymore wallflowers.” His gaze darted right at Chester before he picked up his beer and took a long swallow. 

_Wallflowers. Come on, Mark, just say, no more Mikes. Mike is the only one. And sadly, he’s better than he used to be._ “Alright, Chaz, we’ve got a checklist. Basically, someone opposite of Mike.” He smirked, leaning over to take a sip from the long curly straw sticking out of his drink. “But maybe less fucking annoying than Noah. He’s too over-eager.” 

Before Chester could run to his lover’s defense, Mark cut in. “I don’t mean ‘no Mikes’. On the contrary. If we could find someone with all those qualifications and who is Asian, I think I’d like that.” Mark sat back, his mood already high as he sipped his beer. _Diversity is good. A Mike without Mike’s attitude could be fun. Besides, if I ever get him off this Chester-exclusive trip, pairing him up with someone who has a similar ethnic background could be hot._ The thought made him smile, which was a red flag to his companions. Mark ideas were dangerous. 

Chester watched his boss for a moment before he looked to Amir, but his coworker only shrugged. _Okay, I’m just not even going to try and think about what he just said. The faster we find someone, the faster we can get out of here._ He took another sip of his drink as he scanned the dance floor. He quickly spotted a blonde boy who looked to be the right age. He had a swimmer’s build and tight jeans that outlined his small ass. He was dancing with a larger fellow who was twice his size. “How about him?” Chester suggested, trying to nonchalantly point. “The blonde with the purple and gray shirt on.”

“He’s alright,” Amir said cooly, looking around. “He doesn’t do it for me, but he’d look good with Devon maybe.” There was an ocean of guys around them, and it was tempting to just go mingle, but both he and Chester knew better than to leave drinks unattended with Mark. He flipped his eyes back to Chester. “You’re way more personable than I am. Go chat him up.” 

Chester pointed at himself. “Me? No. I can’t do that.” 

“No, I like that idea,” Mark decided as his ears caught the back half of Amir’s comment. “Go along, Chaz. Go see what he’s made of,” he said, nodding his chin toward the blonde. 

Chester’s mouth fell open. “But, but Mark,” he whined, but his boss hushed him. 

“Oh stop worrying. This _is_ work. I’m not asking you to fuck the guy against the wall. Just go say hello and dance a little,” he insisted, waving his hand out toward the dance floor. “You can check out his personality and we’ll stay here and judge how it looks. I can size him up against you, and if it’s a no-go, I’ll signal you and you can come back. Okay?” he asked, even though it wasn’t really a question. 

Amir dropped his eyes to study his pineapple wedge when Chester looked at him for help. It wouldn’t do any good for him to jump to his co-workers defense. Besides, he knew Mark was right. It was just work. “Go on, Chaz, if you look like you need help, I’ll be on my way.” 

Chester looked from his boss to Amir, and he knew he didn’t have a choice. He was going to be the bait, whether he liked it or not. “Fine,” he agreed. He took another sip from his martini before he slid from his stool. He tugged at his orange shirt and fussed with his hair for a second before he headed back around the banister to get to the entrance to the dance floor. _Mike would kill me. Mike would. . .no. I can’t think like that. I’m not doing anything wrong. I’m doing what Mark ordered me to do. God, don’t I sound like a brainwashed idiot._ He grumbled at himself before he forced a smile and stepped out among the dancers, determined to make his way to the blonde with the interesting shirt. 

Mark watched intently as Chester crossed the dance floor. He had to snigger a little when Chester rubbed the back of his neck, and tugged at the front of his shirt while talking to the blonde. “Isn’t that cute. Our outgoing Chazzy has become shy,” Mark chuckled as he turned his attention to Amir. 

“He doesn’t want to be here,” Amir said. It was obvious from the moment Mark had mentioned going to the club that Chester wasn’t interested, and it wasn’t just in front of Mike. He really, truly had no desire to talk to anyone else. It was going to be a long night if he didn’t fake it better. 

Mark snorted out a humph. “He doesn’t know what he wants. That boyfriend of his has him brainwashed lately.” He looked back out on the dance floor and he cracked a short smile at the sight of Chester standing alone with the blonde, the two of them starting to dance to the faster tune playing over the speakers. “He’s really out of practice,” Mark mumbled before he picked up his beer and glanced back at Amir. He studied him for a second - the amount of eyeliner he was wearing and the blonde streak that ran through his pitch black hair. “So why are you here?” he asked. “Ryan would have come along if you hadn’t volunteered.” He narrowed his eyes for a second. “Volunteering usually isn’t your thing.” 

“I was thinking I might find a good time somewhere in here,” Amir stated drily. “New city, new faces.” He flicked his eyes back out over the crowd. _Fucking Ryan. Now I’m going to have to get out there and actually put some effort into this._ With a sigh, he took another sip from his straw. “If you don’t mind, of course.” 

“You can go next,” Mark decided. “After Chaz comes back. Do you _have_ an opinion on the blonde?” he asked, nodding toward the dance floor. “Now that he’s next to a good example of what YRS has to offer. What do you think?” He waited, quietly drumming his fingers on the table as Amir wrapped his hands around his drink a little more. 

Amir shrugged. “You want an honest opinion? I don’t think he adds anything new. You got your boy next door look in Noah and Devon. Don’t you want someone a little more interesting?” He zeroed in on a guy with a broader build and dark caramel skin across the room. “Like that guy there.” He nodded in the direction of the more exotic looking stranger. 

Mark took a drink. “You might have a point there.” He twisted in his seat, eyeing the guy he thought Amir was petitioning for. “The one in the leather pants? With the bit of orange in his hair?” he asked. 

“He looks tasty from here,” Amir responded. “Though maybe I’ll just keep him for myself.” 

“Nonsense. We’re here on business,” Mark stated, pounding a finger into the table. “You can go dance with him, and if he seems keen, we’ll give him a more serious trial.” He saw the eye roll from Amir, but he dismissed it. “So you know Ryan’s contract is up in a year. Has he mentioned if he’s going to sign back on? If not, we’ll have to find you a new partner.” 

Of all the things Mark could have asked, that was a question Amir definitely wasn’t prepared for, and he huffed out a breath while he tried to think of an answer. He knew without a doubt in his mind that Ryan was done the moment his contract was up, and Jason wouldn’t be far behind. Despite his general lack of concern for his coworkers, he felt a loyalty to Ryan that he didn’t feel with anyone else. Giving away anything tonight could be dangerous. “We’ve talked about the lack of options around YRS lately,” Amir responded, skirting the question. “We used to have more people around the place. It wouldn’t hurt to work on some new people no matter what anyone decides to do.” 

From behind his beer mug, Mark study every move Amir made. The way he measured his words and how carefully he stated his answer. “We purposely thinned the herd,” Mark told him, setting down his drink. “We wanted to get back down to quality instead of quantity, both in models and individual scenes. That was a decision Jason and I made together.” He let out a breath before he looked back out on the dance floor. Chester was still attempting to dance, but it seemed he couldn’t really get much of a rhythm going with the blonde. _That’s a waste of time._

Mark raised his hand, waving, and it didn’t take long for Chester to catch the signal to come back. “There,” Mark said before he drained the last of his beer, and slid his glass to the side. “You can go hit up your exotic man as soon as he’s back at the table. And I don’t expect we’ll be signing on a ton of people all at once. It will be slow and methodical. Quality, Amir. That’s the name of the game,” he insisted, wagging his finger at his employee. “We’re steering YRS toward a more high end look, and that means less models so we can spend more money on better models, better props, and better locations. Like the house here,” he said swinging his hand around to capture all of Seattle. “You and Ryan are close. I get that. I’m sure he tells you things.” 

Another shrug. “Sure. We talk. It’s not like we’re besties.” He couldn’t wait for Chester to get back to the table so he could get away from Mark’s questions about Ryan. _He owes me_ , he thought for at least the tenth time in the short amount of time they’d been away from the house.

Mark looked toward the bar, already wanting another drink. “He seems happy,” he commented as his eyes drifted from the bar over to Chester, who was making his way through the dozens of tables situated around the outside of the dance floor. “Is he seeing anyone?” he asked, his attention flipping sharply back to Amir. “Ryan. Does he have a boyfriend?” 

“Jesus, what is this, get all the info on your employees evening? I told you, Ryan’s not out fucking everyone he finds, there’s some guy he’s got a decently steady thing with, but none of us do boyfriends. You see where that got Chaz.” He turned to look at Mark. “The one you’ve got to worry about is Noah. He’s so fucking excited by every little thing. He’ll be the one out screwing everyone he can find just to have something interesting to talk about.”

Mike leaned forward as he growled, “That’s my point. Ever since Chaz has been hitched to Mike’s fidelity wagon, he hasn’t been the same. At work. We’ve all seen it,” he stressed, his lips curling. “And I’m seeing the same signs in Ryan.” 

Chester finally made it to the table, and he was relieved. Despite his complicated relationship with his boss, he’d take sitting with Mark any day of the week over being forced to dance and flirt with a stranger. “It’s a bust. He wouldn’t be a good fit at all,” he announced as he sat back down in front of his drink and quickly took a swallow. He tugged at the collar of his shirt. “It’s fucking hot in here.” 

“I’m gonna go see about that treat over there now,” Amir said quickly, sliding off the barstool and taking off toward his chosen target without even looking back. His heart was beating a little fast after Mark’s accusations and he knew he needed to calm down if he was going to get the phone number he was seeking.

“I’ll be right back,” Mark announced as he stood up right after Amir. “I’m going to go get another drink. Do you want another?” he asked, pointing to Chester’s half empty martini glass with one hand while he slid his other around Chester’s shoulders. “It’s on me, of course.” 

Chester barely glanced at his boss before he said, “No thanks. I’m still working on this one.” He waited until Mark was away from the table before he pulled his phone from his pocket and pulled up Mike’s text box. 

**8:32 pm** _Hey Sexy Boy. Miss you so much. It’s fucking boring here._

He sent the message, hoping his boyfriend would respond quickly. Dancing with the blonde had made him feel a little dirty, even though it was just for work. Even though he’d been ordered to do it, and he really wanted to refresh himself with some of Mike’s company, even if it was only over text. 

**8:32 pm** _I miss you too_  
 **8:33 pm** _Everything okay? I’m in the kitchen with Brad. He won’t let me have any more cereal. I think he might be making me cupcakes though._  
 **8:33 pm** _Send me a selfie_

The triple set of texts sent a grin across Chester’s face. _He wants to see me._ He took a second to fan his hand over his mohawk and adjust his shirt a little before he sat up staight in his his chair, held his phone out in front of him, smiled wide and snapped a picture. He sent it quickly, before looking over his shoulder for Mark. 

**8:35 pm** _How’s this? And if he’s making cupcakes, you’ve got to steal us some and take them up to the room for later._

He kept his phone on his lap so he could feel it vibrate as he took another sip from his drink and tried to spot Amir among the club goers. 

**8:36 pm** _That sounds like fun, and you look so hot. Don’t forget how hot you are, don’t want to give anyone the wrong idea. I love you_

**8:37 pm** _Aw Sexy Boy, it’s a snooze fest here compared to you and cupcakes in bed. I’m just trying to be invisible. Love you, too. I’ll see you soon. Hopefully._

He quickly sent the message and pocketed his phone just as Mark returned to the table. To Chester’s anguish, his boss set a brand new vodka martini down in front of him. 

“I know you said you didn’t want another one yet, but I get the feeling we’re going to be here for awhile. I’m not feeling that guy Amir picked out.” He pointed out to the dance floor and he watched as Chester followed his gesture before he sat back down, his new beer in hand. “So, tell me about this guy Ryan’s seeing.”

Chester had to keep his jaw from dropping as he looked away from Amir’s awkward dancing to stare his boss in face. “What. . .what do you mean?” He could feel his palms sweating and he rubbed them on the legs of his jeans under the table. _Oh shit. Oh shit. Oh shit._

Mark took a slow drink from his frosty beer, keeping one eye on Chester’s small panic attack happening right in front of him. He licked his lips as he sat his glass down. “This steady _thing_ Amir told me he has going on. Come on, Chazzy. I’m not stupid. I know Ryan tells you everything. You two have always been thick as thieves. Now spill it.” 

Chester felt like he as going to have a heart attack right there in the middle of the gay bar. He manically looked form Mark out to Amir, searching for an answer he knew wasn’t going to come. _No way Amir mentioned Jason. No fucking way in hell. He must have made something up. How could he do that and not fill me in??_ “Um, yeah,” Chester agreed with a nod, as he decided to play it all off in the most generic way possible. “You know Ry, he’s never been real serious about anyone, but this guy he’s. . . he’s, he’s thinking about being kind of serious with. At least regular with,” he tried to explain without being specific. 

Mark studied his employee for a moment from behind his glass before taking a large gulp of beer. “What’s his name?” he asked next, and the moment he saw hesitation in Chester’s eyes, he thumped his glass down on the table and repeated, “What’s his name, Chaz?” 

Chester grabbed his martini and took a long, slow drink as names whirled around in his head. He had no idea if Amir had given a name to this make believe boyfriend or not. If he did, then Chester knew he was completely screwed. He sat his empty glass down, his head spinning a little as he blurted out, “Jadon! His name is Jadon. He calls him Jay now and again,” he added, even though he kicked himself for saying that. Adding any extra information right now was bad. 

Mark waited a moment before he said, “Interesting. Jay. Jadon. I think I like that. Ryan and Jadon. Ryan and _Jay_ ,” he said a little slower. “Guess we’ll see how long that lasts. Drink your drink, Chaz,” he ordered as he looked out on the dance floor. “As soon as Amir gets back, you’re up again.” 

It wasn’t too long before Amir was headed back to the table, a bit of sass showing in the way he was moving his hips and the way he was looking at Mark. He’d left his new dance partner with an offer to think about, and he knew it wouldn’t be long until he came over to take him back out on the dance floor - or somewhere else. As he neared the table Chester bounced up from his seat and started toward him, and he quirked an eyebrow at the sudden enthusiasm.

“What’s up, Chaz?”

Chester almost tripped over his own feet as he grabbed Amir by the arm, and leaned in close. “I told Mark that Ry’s boyfriend’s name is Jadon. Jay for short. Don’t ask me why, he was asking me questions!” he almost cried, before he let him go. “I totally panicked!” He looked back at Mark, who was watching them closely. “Fuck. Okay, we never talked,” he insisted, feeling the alcohol rushing over his good sense, as he patted Amir’s shoulder and headed for the dance floor where he was to flirt and dance with another potential YRS model, this one with a nose ring and muscles that went on for miles. 

“Goddamnit,” Amir hissed, trying to keep the smirk on his face he usually wore. “Go off and leave me to clean this mess up,” he mumbled under his breath as he took the last few steps to the table and reached for his drink. “Chaz is right,” he stated, motioning one hand to the dance floor. “It’s fucking hot out there.” 

“I’m sure it is,” Mark said cooly. “Was that all he said? It looked like he had a lot to say in the few seconds he was grabbing you.” 

“And that you screwed me out of another drink.” Amir held up his almost empty glass and nodded toward Chester’s second martini. “Where’s mine?” 

Mark grumbled as he rolled his eyes. “When you’re ready for another, I’ll make sure you get one. How was your erotic dancer?” he asked, sitting back on his stool and staging casualness. 

“I’m ready,” Amir answered immediately. “And we’ll see how things turn out with him. He’s definitely got moves. I gave him some not very subtle hints, so…” He winked at Mark and then sucked down the remainder of his drink, plopping it down on the table with a loud _clink!_ “Drink?” he asked again. 

Mark fussed with his top collar button before he stood up. “What was the name of that atrocity of a drink you ordered?” 

“Sex on the Beach,” Amir purred, looking up at Mark from under his lashes. “Tell them to make it extra sexy.” 

Mark held back his eye roll as he scooped up his beer mug and headed for the bar. He hated waiting on anyone, but he wanted to make sure Amir and Chester’s drinks were covered, and they were loose enough to flirt and have fun. It was the best way to compare body types and personalities with possible future YRS candidates. 

He stood, tapping his fingers on the bar as we he waited. The music wasn’t horrid, but a little loud for his taste. _Jason never would have made it with that headache of his._ The thought of his husband maneuvered Mark to dig his phone from his pocket. He was ready to pull Jason’s name up and send him a quick ‘how are you feeling?’ text, but something else caught his eye as he leaned against the bar. A few feet away, sitting on a bar stool and sipping what looked to be a bloody mary, was a young Asian looking fella with raven dark hair and black eyes with a boyish smile Mark’s way to match. 

Amir waited until Mark was away from the table before he slumped back in his seat for a moment. _We have to tell Ryan. He’s going to be pissed. I can’t believe Chaz gave a name._ He reached for his phone but before he could get it out of the tight pocket he’d put it in, he spotted his eye candy headed his way. _Later. I’ll have time to tell him before we get home. Right now, I’ve got other things to do._

He dismissed worries of Ryan as he shot a suggestive smile toward the man with the orange tipped dark hair. “Hey,” he called, sliding off the barstool again to meet him. “Let’s go.” He started toward the back corner of the bar without looking back. He knew without a doubt that he was being followed. 

****

Brad wiped down the long countertop as he kept one eye on Mike. Dinner was over, and with everyone’s bellies full and strawberry cupcakes baking in the oven for dessert, the only thing left was to make sure his area was spotless. _A clean space is a happy space_ the cook thought as he smiled and swirled his wipe rag in a circle. He scrubbed a little extra hard at a stubborn chunk of something stuck to his countertop, but once that crisis was averted, he tossed the rag over his shoulder and stepped in front of Mike, who was slouched on one of the barstools. “Cupcakes will be ready in a few minutes,” he assured him as he tried to see at least a small glint of happiness on the young man’s face. 

“They smell good,” Mike offered, his focus on his phone that was sitting silent on the countertop in front of him. He knew it didn’t do any good to stare at it, but it was the only connection he had to Chester at the moment. It felt like it had been a lifetime since he’d left with Mark, and Mike’s anxiety was through the roof. He’d barely been able to eat at dinner, which wasn’t like him at all.

“You shouldn’t worry so much,” the chef suggested as he leaned forward, his hands resting on the counter. “They’ll be back soon, and I’m sure Chaz will be just fine. I’ve got his dinner saved for him in the refrigerator and he loves cupcakes.” He flashed a smile at Mike, but it faded quickly. “It’s not the first time he’s been volunteered to go out on a mission. He’ll be fine.” 

Mike looked up, catching Brad’s eyes. “I wish you knew that for sure. I wish you’d _seen_ it, you know? How you do? I think I’d feel better if there was at least that.” He sighed, then looked back at his phone. It was the closest he’d come to admitting that maybe Brad’s visions weren’t entirely made up, and right now he desperately wished that he had something else to cling to other than Brad’s kindness. He wanted something a little more concrete.

“I’m sorry, Mike, but I haven’t had any visions about tonight,” Brad told him honestly. “But I see no reason to think that something bad will happen.” His eyes flipped away from Mike’s droopy face to the living space, where Devon and Noah were sitting on the couch, the two of them laughing as they watched something on the large screen television that looked a little like a Spanish Soap Opera. “He’s been happy,” Brad said, focusing back on Mike. “And I don’t need a vision to see that. Chaz was. . .” he paused, his hand going into his curly hair as he thought. “Numb,” he decided. “He was numb before you came around, Mike. Chaz was very good at putting on a smile and a laugh, but you could see the numbness in his eyes. That look isn’t there anymore, like his soul has been brought back to life.” 

“That’s all I want. I want him to be happy. He deserves to be happy.” Mike took a deep breath and reached for his phone, sliding it into his front pocket. _I’ll stop staring at it,_ he decided, looking back at Brad. “Thank you. I guess not seeing anything bad is as good as seeing something good.” He looked out at the living area for a moment, and decided he’d rather spend his time in the kitchen with Brad. “So… Ches never lets me frost cupcakes, I’m not very good at it. Maybe you can show me how to do it and I can frost his for him, just to prove I can.” 

An outsider would have thought that Brad had just been told that he’d won the lottery. His face went from a soft smile to beaming as he practically clapped his hands. “Oh, we can go through piping bag basics!” he cheered just as the timer on the oven dinged. He spun around. “Let me pull these beauties out and I’ll show you how to make frosting and set up your piping bag while they cool.” He was already pulling on his oven mitts just as Ryan stepped into the kitchen. “They’re not ready yet,” Brad was quick to tell him. “They still need to cool and then Mike and I are going to frost them.” He set the two muffin tins on the cooling rack before he shut the hot oven. 

Ryan ran a hand through his dark spiked hair as he looked around, his blue eyes shooting from Brad to Mike, on the other side of the kitchen. “Oh, okay,” he said. “I’m just looking for something small while I wait,” he mumbled, hoping the cook wouldn’t give him the third degree. He and Jason had already skipped out on dinner, and that in itself had been a lot of conversation with Brad that Ryan had managed to make it through, but he wasn’t in the mood for round two. All he wanted was to find something sexy to take back to the bedroom. Jason had agreed to food play, since for the first time in a long time, they actually had more than a few minutes with each other. It would be something new, an experience they could share and have fond memories of, so now it was just a matter of finding chocolate sauce or strawberries. _Or anything sensual._

Brad crossed his arms, abandoning the cupcakes preparation for a moment. “If you’re hungry, I saved the leftovers from dinner,” Brad protested as he watched Ryan open one of the cabinets. “Roast and potatoes. You need to eat real food, Ryan. You and Jason both. I should go check on him. . .” 

Ryan spun around. “He’s fine,” he blurted out before he could stop himself. “I mean, I was just down that hallway,” he amended, generically pointing in the direction of the master bedroom. “I peeked in on him, and he’s still lying down.” He nodded, hoping maybe his point would get across and Brad would drop the subject. “Not sure he’s able to eat yet,” he added. 

Brad waited for a second, studying Ryan’s cool eyes. “Alright,” he agreed, “but if you get hungry later, I’ll heat dinner up for you. I have to heat plates up for the Three Musketeers when they get back anyway. Maybe one or both of you will be up to eating by then.” He turned away and back toward the counter as he started mumbling off ingredients he needed to gather to make the buttercream frosting for the cupcakes. 

“Anything I can do to help?” Mike asked, watching as Ryan stood looking lost in the middle of the kitchen. He had no idea what Ryan was up to, but figured that whatever it was, Brad was in the way. 

“I can always use help,” Brad answered. “Wash your hands and come on.” He waved his arm toward the stand mixer he was plugging in. 

Mike slid off the barstool and shrugged his shoulders at Ryan before he walked over to the sink and washed his hands. “I’m just warning you now, I’m a wreck in the kitchen. All I can make is cereal and sandwiches. Oh! And a grilled cheese. I can do that, too,” he added, somewhat proudly. From the corner of his eye he saw Ryan move toward the cabinets.

“Everyone should have a basic knowledge of how to prepare at least a handful of meals and desserts,” Brad decided as he opened a drawer and picked through the different mixer attachments. 

“Yeah, but he lives with Chaz,” Ryan added from where he was at the far end of the kitchen, scanning the shelves for anything sexy. “He doesn’t have to know how to cook.” 

“Yeah, Ches does all the cooking,” Mike said, laying the kitchen towel he’d just dried his hands with on the counter. “He’s amazing. I tell him all the time he should go to culinary school or something. I think he’d be good at it.” He turned and watched Brad and Ryan both on opposite ends of the kitchen, both on a mission. He wasn’t sure what either of them were looking for, so he just stood back and waited.

“Chaz does very well,” Brad commented before he found what he was looking for. He scooted back over in front of the mixer to attach the whisk paddle. “He’s pitched in and helped me a lot over the years. Anyone who can keep up with the hungry stomachs of YRS has a good shot at doing something more.” He glanced Mike’s way. “Is he wanting to go to school? He’s never mentioned it.” 

Mike dropped his gaze to the floor. The subject of what to do after YRS was always a touchy one with Chester. “I don’t think so. I was the one that brought it up, when we were talking about what to do when we left YRS.” He paused, thinking through what he wanted to say. After all, Brad was Mark’s cousin, and even though he liked Brad, he wasn’t entirely sure that he could trust him. “I told him he should think about something with food, and maybe go to culinary school, but he said he’s not good at school.” 

Ryan had his back to the others. He’d already been through almost every cabinet, and he wasn’t finding anything. His last resort was the refrigerator. _Which is where strawberries would be. . .if we have any. We did the shopping, I should know what we bought! Guess I wasn’t really paying attention while we were at the store. Not at the food, anyway. The chocolate might be in refrigerator, too._ He turned, trying not to draw attention to himself as Brad and Mike continued to discuss Chester’s future without him. _Hmmmm. . .if I open the fridge, that will definitely get Brad’s attention. Then he really will want to heat up roast and potatoes for us, and roast and potatoes aren’t sexy. I can’t eat roast and potatoes off of Jason’s naked body._

The image of his lover’s slender form and dark sensual eyes popped into Ryan’s mind. He knew Jason was in the bedroom waiting. He wasn’t just waiting, he was already naked and laid out on the sheets, ready for Ryan to come back with their agreed upon food so they could take their time to kiss and lick each other in a round of unusual foreplay they were both excited about. _Fuck it._ he decided quickly as he looked back at the cabinet and grabbed the first two things that seemed somewhat close to what he’d been originally looking for. With as much stealth as he could come up with, he shoved the bags of miniature marshmallows and chocolate chips up under his shirt. He couldn’t walk out of the kitchen holding them out in the open, or Brad would question him. 

Ryan shut the cabinet door, and then with his back still facing the others, he slowly sidestepped his way out of the kitchen, inch by inch. 

Mike didn’t even notice Ryan was gone until he turned to try to include him in the conversation about Chester and school. “Oh. Guess Ryan got what he needed,” Mike commented, peering into the living area to see if Ryan had gone in there or back upstairs. “I guess he’ll come down and eat when Ches gets back. Maybe I’ll eat again, too,” he added. “I’ll just feel so much better when he’s back.” He resisted the urge to pull out his phone and text his boyfriend again, just to check on him. 

****  
TBC


	41. Seattle Part Four: Icing and Marshmallows

By the time Ryan got back to the master bedroom, he was pulling the bags out from under his shirt. It wasn’t chocolate sauce and strawberries, but he was pretty sure Jason liked marshmallows. And chocolate chips were close enough. He cracked the bedroom door open and peeked in before he stepped all the way in and closed the door behind him. Jason was on the bed, right where he’d left him - naked and on his back. The lamp on the nightstand was on, sending a soft amber glow through the room. “I’m back,” Ryan said, crossing the room. 

“What’s that?” Jason asked, pointing at the bags. Nothing they had discussed came in bags. “And you have too many clothes on, you know.” He lifted his hand and beckoned Ryan closer. “And you were gone forever,” he whined a little.

“The kitchen was kinda crowded,” Ryan said as he walked over and sat on the edge of the bed. “So I grabbed what I could. Chocolate chips and marshmallows. The little ones like you put in your hot chocolate.” He twisted around to face Jason, holding the bags up. “If you don’t like it, we don’t have to do it.” He left the bags on the bed before he stood up to shed his clothes. 

Jason sat up, reaching for the bag of mini marshmallows and laughing softly. “I’m gonna outline your whole body in these and eat them off, one by one,” he said, shaking the bag. “It will be a sugar overload.” He watched Ryan pull off his black t-shirt and toss it to the floor before he stopped him. “Wait. I think you need help with those.” He pointed his marshmallow bag at Ryan’s jeans. 

“I’ll always take your help,” Ryan smirked as he stepped closer to the bed and put his arms out to the side. “How much help are you offering?” 

“Just come here,” Jason mumbled as he scooted to the edge of the bed, dropping the marshmallows and reaching for Ryan’s belt. He hooked his fingers over the waistband of the jeans and inched him a little closer before he leaned forward and pressed his lips to Ryan’s stomach. “Mmm, you smell delicious. And I’m not just smelling the marshmallows,” he added, nuzzling his nose into the skin above his belly button. He took a few seconds to leave kisses all over Ryan’s stomach as he unbuckled his belt and unbuttoned his jeans. It was hard to remember they had time, that he could kiss all those tender places and commit them to memory. It didn’t have to be rushed. 

Jason pushed Ryan’s jeans down his legs and watched him shiver a little as he ran his fingers up the back of his thighs. “Step out, and get over here,” he said, his fingers anxious to feel more.

Ryan got out of his jeans as quickly as he could, flinging them across the room without care before he did the same with his underwear. It was almost a triumphant throw as he balled them up and tossed them in the same direction his jeans had gone. Usually they had to keep their clothes close by so they could pull them on in a moments notice, but not this time. 

“Lay down,” Ryan said, as he went to get on the bottom of the bed. He watched as Jason scooted back to the middle, and Ryan was between his legs, opening them up. He could see Jason’s dark eyes by the dim light, as he said, “You’re beautiful, you know that? I never get to just stare at you. . .I know you see me because of the movies, but you, you’re always this flash I never get to savor.” He was on his knees, running his hands up and down Jason’s thighs as he spoke, letting his senses soak in the feel of all the soft hair and muscle under his fingers. 

“It’s gotten harder and harder to film you,” Jason admitted, watching Ryan’s face as he touched him. “Sometimes I have to look away… but right now I don’t have to look anywhere else. You’re the only thing that exists.” He inched his hands toward Ryan’s, covering them and squeezing their fingers together. “This is amazing, being with you. You make me so happy.” He tugged on Ryan’s hands just a little, trying to get him closer, wanting to kiss him.

“I love it when we’re together,” Ryan said, as he moved forward. He knew what Jason wanted, but he wasn’t ready to give up his worshipping just yet. He bent his head down, placing a soft kiss to Jason’s flat stomach. “Just think when we get to do this every day,” he mumbled before he shut his eyes. He reminded himself they were alone, as he licked his tongue in a circle, first around Jason’s navel, and then up to his pecs. “Every night,” he said, his voice dreamy as he went for the nipple that was the closest. It was already hard and waiting for him as he licked and tugged at it. 

“I’m gonna mess your hair all up,” Jason sighed, lifting a hand to the top of Ryan’s head and twisting his fingers through it. He pushed his body a little closer to his boyfriend’s lips, his fingertips tingling with anticipation as Ryan teased him. Every night sounded like the best plan he’d ever heard. It was hard to imagine a world where they would have time to do this every night. He dragged his other hand up Ryan’s spine and across his shoulders, grabbing on to one as he squeezed his legs around Ryan’s body. It was like he couldn’t get close enough. “You’re killing me,” he whispered. “All I want to do is kiss you.” 

A pleased smirk hit Ryan’s lips as he lifted his head and looked at Jason’s face. “Kisses it is,” he answered before he put his head back down. He started where he was, right at Jason’s nipple, and happily kissed his way all the way up to his boyfriend’s face. He scooted up, his knees pressed into the mattress, but his lower half was squared up perfectly with Jason’s. He could feel his boyfriend’s cock, and the heat that was coming from it as their skin came into full contact. 

Ryan pressed his lips to Jason’s jawline, and then around until he found his lips. His eyes were shut, his mind far away and dreaming as he felt the dampness in Jason’s kiss. Ryan was the first to slide his tongue forward, to join every bit of flesh they could as they sank into each other. 

There was nothing like kissing Ryan in Jason’s world. The second he felt Ryan’s tongue push forward he let his mouth open wider, inviting him in as he felt the press of his hips to his lower half. He played back for a moment, gently stroking his lover’s lips and tongue with his own, savoring the warmth and wetness between them before he pulled back just a little to catch his breath. They could so easily get lost in each other’s kisses, and Jason wanted more. He kissed the side of Ryan’s mouth and then sucked his bottom lip between his teeth, giving him a little nip before he pressed forward again, seeking the unique feel and taste of the kisses they made together. One of his hands was still in Ryan’s hair, and he tugged on it lightly as their lips stayed connected. 

Jason’s fingers in his hair was one of Ryan’s favorite things. The moment he tugged, Ryan heard himself moan. Aside from sex, and general rubbing/hugging/touching, hair playing was next on Ryan’s list. He could lay in bed or on a couch somewhere and let Jason play with his hair for hours, or at least he thought he could. That was something they’d never had the luxury of doing, since their time was limited on regular days. 

Ryan broke their kiss, taking a breath and then petting his lips down Jason’s face and then back toward his neck. He curled his tongue around the shell of his boyfriend’s ear first, sucking on it and making sure to leave behind a few panty breaths before moving on. He wanted to suck on Jason’s tender neck skin. He wanted to be like a normal couple and give him a hickey. He wanted nip and bite and enjoy Jason’s body while they shared each other, and before he could stop himself, he was doing it. His mind was off as his teeth latched onto Jason’s neck for the first time in his life. 

Without thinking, Jason stretched his head back, giving complete access to Ryan’s lips and teeth. Nothing mattered but the two of them in that moment. He dug his fingers into Ryan’s hair and pressed him closer with no regard for any consequence, any evidence of their lovemaking that could be left behind. “I love you,” he gasped as he felt Ryan’s soft suckles on the pulse of his neck. He shifted his hips a little and felt Ryan push back, their cocks pressed against each other.

The sound of Jason’s voice brought Ryan’s senses back, and he let his neck go. He instinctually kissed the spot he’d been kissing before he focused back on Jason’s face. “I love you, too,” he said, before he kissed Jason’s cheek and then under his chin. He wiggled his hips, sending a small slapping motion between their cocks and laughed. “If we’re going to get to your marshmallows, we better do it. Or we can stay like this,” he offered, grazing a thumb over dark spot he’d left on his boyfriend’s neck. 

“It would be a shame to let them go to waste,” Jason responded, even though marshmallows were the last thing on his mind at the moment. He knew Ryan was right, though. If they didn’t start that now, it wouldn’t happen, and he didn’t want to ignore a request from his lover. “Okay. Okay. Damn. You make it too easy to just say fuck it and forget about them.” He pressed a hand to Ryan’s chest and backed him away gently so he could sit up, taking a couple of calming breaths as they reorganized themselves. “You should lay down.” He reached for the marshmallow bag and squished it lightly between his hands. 

The words ‘lay down’ brought an instant excitement to Ryan’s body and mind. It wasn’t often he got the pleasure of having Jason on top of him, since they were usually in such a rush. He didn’t wait as they traded places, as their limbs and tangled around the sheets and each other as they tried to arrange themselves. 

Ryan tapped the bed with both hands as he laid on pins and needles, while he watched Jason messing with the marshmallows. The thought to pull his lover right on top and say screw the marshmallows was a strong one. He even made it as far as running his fingers down Jason’s back, before he decided to be good and stick to the plan. 

“Okay,” Jason said for what felt like the hundredth time since they’d been alone. “You’re going to have to lay totally still. We don’t want any of these little guys going overboard.” He glanced up at Ryan’s amused face as he started a pattern of marshmallows every inch or so down the center of Ryan’s chest. He sat them on their ends so they wouldn’t roll, and giggled a little as Ryan learned not to take deep breaths so they wouldn’t fall off. 

“Not to sound needy,” Ryan said in a strained voice, “but hurry up, Jay. I think I might suffocate.” He let out a slow breath and then barely took another. The story would have been different if he would have been lying on a therapist’s couch, or in his own bed fast asleep, but he wasn’t. He was in the master bedroom, naked with his lover, hard as a rock, and being covered in marshmallows. Breathing easy wasn’t so easy. 

Jason clicked his tongue and shook his head. “You’re not gonna suffocate. I won’t let you. And I know you… you are the master of restraint. You manage not to jump me every time you see me,” he teased, popping a marshmallow into Ryan’s belly button. “There. Since you’re so impatient, that’s all I’ll do.” He carefully leaned to put the marshmallow bag down, then hovered over Ryan on his hands and knees. “Don’t move,” he reminded his lover as he kissed the tip of his nose.

He started between Ryan’s nipples, kissing on both sides of the marshmallow before licking it into his mouth and moving on to the next one. He took a detour over to one nipple, pressing his tongue against it and then biting it lightly, laughing a little as Ryan gasped and the carefully placed line of marshmallows shifted, one rolling off his chest and onto the bed. “Ry, you’re making a mess,” he complained, ducking his head to grab the marshmallow that had fallen with his teeth. 

“It’s not my fault,” Ryan argued, which wasn’t the easiest as he tried to keep his breathing and voice low and steady. “Your marshmallows are unstable.” He curled his fingers into the bedsheets, determined to do better and stay still as a statue. 

“Mmmhmm,” Jason hummed as he kissed up Ryan’s side, smiling as he felt the hitch in the already shallow breathing his lover was struggling to maintain. “You smell like marshmellows,” he cooed, licking a path back over to grab another marshmallow, then another before he looked up. Ryan’s eyes were a shade darker than normal in the dim lighting as they watched Jason’s every move.

“That’s the smell of desperation,” Ryan said, trying to hold back his laugh. “Desperately needing you to hurry up this marshmallow feast.” He cocked an eyebrow, but kept his eyes on his lover, and the silly grin that was on Jason’s lips. “You’re enjoying this too much,” Ryan decided, resisting the urge to let go of the sheets and grab Jason to pull him all the way on top instead. 

“Do I need to remind you that this was _your_ idea?” Jason asked playfully before he licked another marshmallow off Ryan’s chest. “Oh, maybe you thought you would be the one torturing me?” He kissed a wet trail down Ryan’s sensitive side until he was closer to his hip bone, then lightly bit down on the warm skin above it. He felt his lover’s gasp more than he heard it, and laughed as more marshmallows rolled onto the bed sheets. 

“Okay, that’s it,” Ryan decided as he half sat up, his longer arms easily reaching Jason’s shoulders. “Come up here with me,” he half begged and half instructed. He tugged as he leaned back, hoping that Jason would climb right on top and they could resume their pre-marshmallow make out session. 

It didn’t take much to convince Jason to abandon his teasing, though he did scoop a marshmallow up and drop it in Ryan’s mouth. “Now you’re just being bossy. You wanted marshmallows, now you don’t. I can’t keep up.” He grinned as he moved his knees on either side of Ryan’s hips and sat right down on his cock. “Maybe I’ll just sit here and finish my dessert.” He plucked the marshmallow from Ryan’s belly button and very slowly stuck out his tongue to take it from his fingers. “I mean, I _am_ pretty comfortable here.” 

Ryan’s hands went right to Jason’s thighs. He slid his fingers up and down them. He could feel his cock pulsing under his boyfriend’s weight, begging to be stroked and given attention. “This is better,” he said while he rubbed Jason’s legs. “And I really just want you - with or without marshmallows. I know it was my idea,” he admitted quickly, “but then it was all about you once we got started.” He feathered his fingers from one leg over to Jason’s stomach, or as close to Jason’s stomach as he could get. “You’re much too far away.” 

Jason looked all around them, checking for stray marshmallows before he slid off to Ryan’s side, wrapping their legs together and pulling on Ryan to face him as he lay down next to him. “How’s this? Better?” He didn’t wait for a response before he ran his hand down to smooth over Ryan’s lower back and scooted closer to get his lips on Ryan’s neck. All the marshmallow kisses in the world couldn’t compare to the taste of his skin, and Jason kissed all up and down the side of Ryan’s neck, then up under his chin in soft pecks. “Better?” he whispered. 

“Mmmhmmm,” Ryan hummed as he returned the embrace. His hand was cupped over Jason’s hip, pulling their lower halves together. Already Ryan could feel Jason’s partial erection, and he made up his mind to quickly rectify that. “I love you,” he whispered as he nuzzled his face into Jason’s warmth, while he squeezed his ass cheek and bucked his hips. 

“Love you, too,” Jason answered as he trailed his kisses over to Ryan’s waiting lips. His eyes were closed, and he savored the feel of Ryan’s body next to him, pressing into him, trying to bring them even closer together. He could feel their shared body heat, and as Ryan’s hips pushed into his, their shared arousal and everything that went with that. As he pulled Ryan’s bottom lip into his mouth, then pulled away before diving back in quickly, Jason was thinking about what it would be like to make love and feel _everything_. Going condom free was something they had yet to do, and even though he knew it wouldn’t happen tonight either, it was a little fantasy he loved to indulge. The fantasy of someday. 

He leaned back to look at Ryan for a moment, his heart wishing he could have everything he wanted as he stared at the relaxed bliss on his lover’s face. “Ry,” he whispered, “this is gonna be so amazing, not having to rush things. I’m so ready to feel you, baby.” He couldn’t even be bothered to flush at his boldness, he was only sorry he’d wasted so much time with those damn marshmallows.

“ _Amazing_ ,” Ryan repeated, before he kissed Jason’s chin and then his cheek to whisper, “Roll over. Put your back against me.” He pecked his boyfriend’s neck and ear, letting Jason’s dark hair mingle over his forehead as he waited, hoping his lover would trust him to take things to the next step. 

Without a second thought, Jason followed directions, untangling his legs from Ryan’s and rolling over to his side after one last kiss. “Like this?” he asked, scooting back until he could feel his lover’s chest against his back, solid and warm. 

“Yeah,” Ryan breathed softly as he slid a hand down Jason’s side, and onto his hip. He took a moment to kiss Jason’s shoulder blade, before he skillfully dropped his hand and scooped one of Jason’s ass cheeks up. He pushed his cock forward, not enough to penetrate, but to snuggle it tight between Jason’s butt cheeks. 

Ryan groaned a little at the hot warmth and how badly his cock wanted to push forward a little more, but he held back. There would be time for that later. First there would need to be lube and a condom. But for now, it was time to make sure Jason was taken care of. 

Ryan brought his hand to his mouth to leave a glob of saliva on his palm. After years of working in porn, he was no stranger to making his own lube. He slung his arm over Jason’s hip, and after only groping around for a second or two, he had Jason’s cock in his hand. He kissed his boyfriend’s shoulder again before he started to slow pump him, sliding his hand up and down, spreading the saliva to ease the friction. 

“Ahhh, fuck,” Jason whispered, leaning his head back just a little. He loved Ryan’s hands anywhere on his body, but when he wrapped his fingers around his cock it was a whole different level of love. There was never time for more than a quick caress, a few practiced strokes, but tonight… tonight he could tell that Ryan had every intention of taking his time. Jason’s eyes were tightly shut as Ryan’s knowing grip stayed on him, his hand coming up and over the head of his dick and taking the drips of precum back down with it. He could feel each twitch and jump of Ryan’s cock between his ass cheeks as he worked, and together with the slow hand job he was getting, the sensations were already driving him crazy. 

“God, Jay,” Ryan moaned as he buried his face into his boyfriend’s naked shoulder blade. He knew he shouldn’t, but the stimulation was rushing over him in waves, running from his toes, up into his thighs and then into all his usable parts. He pushed his cock forward a little more, the tip of his dick nudging against Jason’s tight opening. He kept his hand moving, his strokes picking up speed as he tugged and squeezed and met every one of Jason’s jerks and movements. 

Ryan cracked his eyes open for a second, one eye completely left in the dark by Jason’s so-close body, the other catching a glimpse of the dim light in the room and the shadows it was creating on the walls. He could feel his cock leaking, and he knew, at least a drop or two of his pre-cum was making it through to the other side of Jason’s tightened wall of anal muscles. The thought was almost too much, and Ryan quickly shut his eyes, trying to calm himself down a little before he did something he wasn’t supposed to. 

Jason’s head was swimming in over stimulation, and trying to keep a clear head with Ryan’s wet cock pressing against him while he pumped his hand over his shaft was hard. He knew they should move. He knew that the _smart_ thing to do would be to stop and get the condom and be responsible, but his disjointed thoughts kept coming back to what he wanted rather than what he should be doing. Ryan’s breaths were heavy on his shoulder and neck and Jason could feel his legs and toes starting to tense in that way that signaled he was _close_. “Ry, Ry, wait a sec,” he choked out between pants, even though he didn’t stop moving his hips in time with Ryan’s hand.

The whine that came from Ryan’s chest, hadn’t been intentional. He husked a few more breaths before he slowed his hand and his hips, bringing everything to the stop Jason had asked for. He waited, his eyes still closed and his forehead pressed to Jason’s sweaty back. His dick was aching - begging - to be let inside, to feel Jason’s body all around it like a glove. “What is it?” Ryan managed to say before he lifted his head and opened his eyes. 

Instantly Jason was missing the movements they’d been creating together, and he wanted whatever was going to bring those movements back. “Are we gonna… I mean, do you want to, do you want to keep going?” he managed to ask, not even sure if his question was clear but almost certain Ryan would know what he meant as he shifted his hips back against his lover again.

The stop in motion, and the lax grip Ryan now had on Jason’s cock had cleared his head a little. Reality was now in front of him as he heard Jason’s question. “I want to,” he said, wanting to make sure that was clear. “But, Jay. . .” He dropped his head back to his lover’s shoulder. “We need to be safe. We have to, until it’s just us.” 

“I know,” Jason whined, fully aware that Ryan was right. “You just feel so good, and I just think about it all the time. I want it to just be us.” He dropped his hand to cover Ryan’s, tightening their fingers around his dick together. “You’re just so fucking good at that, you know?” He shifted their hands together for a second and then sighed. “You want to get the condom or me?”

“I’ll do it,” Ryan volunteered, letting his fingers stay mixed up with Jason’s for a second longer before he pulled away. He brought his hand to Jason’s hip, and used it to steady himself as he pulled his hips back, dragging his dick away from Jason’s ass. A small frown hit Ryan’s lips as the air hit him. He’d been so close. 

“I’ll be quick,” he promised as he let go of Jason completely and sat up, ignoring the rush to his head. “Do you have one in here? Where is it?” he looked around, his eyes darting to the chair in the corner, and the closed closet door. There was a nightstand with a drawer, but he wasn’t sure if Jason’s stuff was in there or Mark’s. 

“Dresser,” Jason mumbled before he spoke up. “Middle drawer, bottom jeans, in the pocket.” He wasn’t stupid enough to leave condoms out freely in the room he shared with Mark, even though he knew for a fact that Mark kept his stash handy for whenever the mood struck him to venture out of their bed. He watched Ryan slide off the bed with a heaviness in his heart. _One day we’re not going to have to stop. One day we’ll be able to do whatever we want, and it won’t matter._

With one hand on his dick, and the other reached out in front of him, Ryan crossed the room. He got to the cedar chest of drawers, and quickly pulled the one Jason had said open. Immediately he could smell his boyfriend’s fresh scent from the Zest soap he was so loyal to lingering over his clothes. A smile popped back across Ryan’s face as he started to dig down to the bottom pair of jeans. 

“Your clothes are so soft,” he said absently as he petted his fingers over the denim. He wanted to pull the jeans all the way out and hold them against his skin just for a second, but he resisted. They had time, but they didn’t have _that_ much time. He fumbled for the back pocket and yanked the condom packet out instead. He shoved the jeans back in place and closed the drawer. 

He headed back to the bed, ripping the wrapper open as he went. “You want to stay like that, or get into a different position?” he asked, eyeing the nice view of his boyfriend’s round ass. The way they had been would probably be a little awkward to get things going, but once they were in their familiar groove of grinds and thrusts, he had no doubt they could make it work. More than work, it would be _amazing._

Jason closed his eyes and sucked in a deep breath before he rolled to get on his hands and knees. “Start here, but let’s go back to how we were,” he suggested. There was no reason to rush, and he wanted to enjoy every second, feel Ryan pressed against his back the way they had been a few minutes ago. _I just want to be close. And where we were felt good. I want to memorize this so I can play it back in my head when I’m trying to fall asleep. I just want things to be different._ He looked over his shoulder as the mattress dipped and Ryan got behind him, catching the sparkle in the blue eyes that he loved. His throat felt a little dry and he swallowed before he encouraged, “come on, baby. Let’s make a new memory.”

**** 

In the kitchen, Brad finally sat down. He let out a long breath, which was followed by a yawn as he shoved his hand through his curls and then he leaned on the bar. He watched as Mike stood on the other side, the piping bag still in his hands as he finished swirling pink icing on the last two cupcakes. “You might be a natural,” the chef offered with droopy eyes. 

“You think?” Mike asked, eyeing the top of the cupcake critically. “It’s kinda like painting, I guess. Watching what you’re doing and having an idea what the finished product should look like.” He shrugged and looked up at Brad with a half smile. “Thanks for letting me help. I needed something to do. Usually when I’m worrying about stuff I paint or play piano. And we don’t have either of those things available here.” 

“That’s what it is,” Brad decided as he perked up a little. “It’s your outside activities - painting and music. It’s made your hands steady and trained.” He pointed down at Mike’s long fingers curled around the clear piping bag that looked cotton candy pink. “And you’re welcome,” he added with a shrug as he leaned back on the bar stool. He could hear the television playing from the living room, where he knew Devon and Caleb were sitting and watching a movie and waiting for dessert to finally be done. He’d seen Noah pass out in the oversized armchair almost an hour ago, and of course Jason was still in bed with a headache. _Which leaves Ryan. . .I wonder where he’s gotten off to by himself?_ “You’re good company,” he finally told Mike with a soft smile. “You and Chaz both. I like having you around.” 

Mike set the pastry bag down on a plate. “Thanks.” He didn’t know what else to do, now that dessert was finished and Chester still wasn’t back. “Well, I guess that’s it,” he said, patting the pocket where is phone was hiding. “I’m gonna check on Ches. It’s been a while.” 

Outside in the driveway, Mark had just turned the car off. He turned to look at Chester in the front seat next to him through the fading dash lights. “You did good tonight,” he assured him before he reached across the console and patted Chester on his leg. “Real good. I think we might just get someone new out of this little adventure.” 

Chester’s eyes had dropped through the dark to Mark’s hand, which was halfway up on his thigh, before he croaked out an agreement. “Yeah, it wasn’t bad at all.” He tried to look over at his boss and push a smile, but he was almost three martinis in, and the alcohol was messing with his reflexes.

“Not bad, you’re right, Chazzy,” Amir called from the back. He was in a better mood than he’d left in, a new phone number in his phone and the promise of a hook-up next time his exotic stud was in LA. 

Mark glanced into the back seat, catching Amir’s blonde stripe by the moonlight coming in through the car’s windows. “You both did a good job. I’m very pleased with the evening.” He looked Chester’s way one last time before he squeezed his leg, and let him go. “Alright, I don’t have all night,” he announced before he opened his door and stepped out. 

Chester’s head rolled a little as he went to try and find the door handle. His legs and fingers were a little tingly, and as he stepped out into the night air. His head rushed, making him misstep slightly. He grabbed the car’s door frame to steady himself. “Fuck. I’ve gotta pull myself together before I go in there,” he said to anyone who would listen, or no one at all. He didn’t care at the moment. “I can’t walk in there stumbling.” 

“You’ll be fine,” Mark decided as he shut his door and headed for the house. “Hurry up, boys!” he called over his shoulder. He was hungry, and he wanted to grab a quick bite of food before he jumped in the shower to get clean and wash away the sweat and general smell of people he’d picked up at the club. 

Mike’s thumb was hovering over the send button when he heard the front door open. Without a second’s hesitation he headed straight for the foyer, trying not to frown as he saw Mark step inside first. He stood back to wait for him to walk by, hoping to avoid conversation with him when all he wanted was to put his hands on Chester to assure himself that his boyfriend was okay. The hours they had been separated felt like an eternity. 

Mark barely glanced Mike’s way as he headed straight for the kitchen. He saw his cousin perched on one of the barstools, the smell of strawberry cake hitting his nose. “My God, it smells devine in here,” he said like a king entering a royal kitchen. He stopped just at the bar, taking a huge whiff of the air. “Strawberry cupcakes are my favorite, and I’m starving.” 

It didn’t take long for Brad to jump to action. Before Mark could even properly ask, he was on his feet, offering to heat up his dinner and he’d be sure to add a cupcake to his plate for when he was done. 

Mark stood with his arms on the granite top of the bar. “Did Jason eat?” 

Brad looked up from where he was spooning potatoes and pieces of roast onto a large dinner plate. “No. I haven’t seen him. I assume he’s still sleeping. I’ll gladly fix him a plate, too, if he’s hungry.” 

“Let me go check on him and see,” Mark decided before he reached over the bar and nabbed a cupcake to take with him down the hallway. 

Chester’s entrance was far less authoritative than Mark’s, and it didn’t take but a moment of assessment for Mike to know he’d had more than one drink. It wasn’t like the night he’d come stumbling home with Ryan, and Mike was grateful, but he still knew that Chester had been subjected to more than just the one drink he’d been hoping to have. “Ches!” Mike rushed to his boyfriend and wrapped his arms around his waist, smacking a kiss on his cheek immediately. “I missed you, babe.”

Chester returned Mike’s embrace, happily nuzzling his face into the crook of Mike’s warm, familiar neck. “I’m so glad to not be there anymore,” he stated, trying to keep the slur from his words. “You smell like cake,” he added before he dragged his tongue up the side of Mike’s face and laughed. 

“You’re like a puppy!” Mike giggled, wiping his cheek with the back of his hand. “Did you eat something? Are you hungry? Where did you go? Did Mark find someone? What did you do?” Mike took a deep breath and shook his head. “Sorry, sorry. I’m just glad you’re back. You’re okay, right?” He lowered his voice as Amir passed them by without a glance, headed straight for the kitchen. “Mark left you alone, right?”

It was a lot of questions all at once, and Chester’s brain felt scrambled. “Yes,” he decided. “I’m hungry. My head, Sexy Boy,” he stated as he touched the side of his mohawk. “It’s a little light. I need to eat something.” He tugged on Mike’s shirt front. “Did you eat already? Was it good?” He stopped when Mike wasn’t moving with him, and Chester turned to see his boyfriend’s dark eyes still waiting for answers. 

Chester glanced around, but they were alone in the foyer. “I’m fine,” Chester assured him, a cracked smile following his words. “I told you, he wasn’t looking at me tonight. Believe me, he had his eyes busy on everyone else.” 

With a satisfied nod, Mike let out a sigh of relief. “Good. He can look at whoever he wants, as long as he’s not looking at you. And yes, I ate, and yes, it’s good. And I have a surprise for you.” He looked toward the kitchen and took a step forward. “You want to see what it is?”

Chester reached for Mike’s hand. “I like your surprises. Is it something in the kitchen?” His stomach was doing something between a rumble and a tumble, his hunger and intoxication not mixing well. “But we still get roast, right? I want ketchup,” he whined as they headed toward the bar. 

“It’s in the kitchen,” Mike assured him. “You can have all the ketchup you want.” He let Chester sit down at the bar and he went around it, into the kitchen, where Brad was fussing with multiple plates and Amir was standing with his arms crossed, watching. “Hey, Brad, can I show Ches what we made?” he asked, pointing toward the plate of cupcakes he’d abandoned when Chester came back. 

“Of course,” Brad answered with less than a glance Mike’s way. “You guys eat them up. They’re best fresh.” He ducked his eye back down to his work, trying to get even portions on the plates, even though he knew enough to put extra on Mark’s. “Chaz, you want your dinner plate?” 

“Yes, please,” Chester said as he leaned forward on the bar, mentally drooling over the chunks of roast and red potatoes before he looked back at Mike. “What’s the surprise? You made something?” he looked around, but he didn’t see any signs of Mike Shinoda anywhere, no pieces of art or sheet music with notes written down. Not even any doodles on napkins. 

“Yep,” Mike said proudly, then immediately amended, “well, I helped.” He picked up the plate and turned to walk it over and set it down in front of Chester with a flourish. “Look! I frosted the cupcakes for Brad!”

Chester looked down at the delicately swirled pink icing before he looked back up. “Really? Well, they look fucking fantastic!” He went to take one right away, not bothering to ask permission since Brad had already ordered them to be eaten. He didn’t even manage to peel back the paper liner before he smashed the hill of icing into his mouth, the semi-sweet taste sending his taste buds into a rush. “It’s good,” he said with a mouth full of sugar. 

Mike couldn’t hold back the grin on his face, even though he was expecting Chester to admire his icing a little more. “You’re a mess,” he decided, reaching over to wipe a bit of the frosting off Chester’s lip. “I guess it tastes good, huh? I didn’t make them, that’s all Brad. And I was kinda waiting on you to have one.” He let his eyebrows raise suggestively as he licked the icing off his thumb. 

It took a second for what Mike was saying to sink in. “Oh, oh, I’m sorry, Sexy Boy,” he apologized. “I just needed something. I’ll eat one with you later, or you can eat one now!” he decided, just as Brad stepped up to the counter, and sat a steaming hot plate of food in front of him, along with the bottle of ketchup. 

“There you go, Chaz. Mike?” he asked, his eyes flipping from one to the other. “I noticed you didn’t eat much earlier. There’s more, if you want a plate.” He hiked his thumb over his shoulder. 

“Sure, maybe a little,” Mike agreed. He leaned over the bar to whisper to Chester, “it was hard for me to eat, I was worried about you. I just hate being away from you.” He moved back in time to miss Chester manhandling the bottle of ketchup to get it to provide the condiment he loved.

“Believe me, I wish you would have been there,” Chester said, nudging Mike gently on his side after he’d sat the ketchup down. “But it was boring. What did you do? Other than make cupcakes?” he asked, before he picked up his fork, ready to dive into the meat and potatoes and the rivers of ketchup he’d covered it all in. 

_Nothing. I didn’t do anything other than sit here and talk to Brad and make cupcakes. Which felt like forever, but I guess it wasn’t._ Mike shrugged his shoulder. “Nothing, actually. It’s weird, while you were gone it felt like you’d been gone for hours. But yeah, all I had time to do was help with these cupcakes. Anyway, as soon as we’re finished, we’re taking these upstairs.” He pointed to the cupcakes before he leaned closer to Chester’s ear. “I bet you’ll taste good with a little icing on you,” he whispered.

Chester’s head leaned back a little as he grinned. “I can’t wait,” he said before turning to catch Mike’s eyes, and a second later he had his lips, too. They shared a soft kiss, and Chester’s hand slid down the side of Mike’s face before he pulled back. “I’ll eat fast,” he promised, just as Brad sat a second plate up on the bar, this one with about half the food on it. 

“Mike,” Brad said, hating to interrupt, “there’s more if that’s not enough,” he assured him, before he turned away, handing Amir his plate next and shooing him out of his work triangle. 

“This is fine,” Mike said, barely looking down at the plate before he picked up his fork. “And don’t eat too fast, Ches, I don’t want you to get sick.” He settled in to his second dinner, methodically working his way around the plate without really thinking about what he was eating. His thoughts were already upstairs with Chester, safe behind their locked bedroom door, with cupcakes.

“You should try it with ketchup,” Chester suggested as he scooted the bottle closer to Mike. “It’s so good,” he practically moaned before he shoved another bite in his mouth and Brad sat two large glasses of water in front of them. “Brad,” Chester called, his fork in the air, “this is great!”

The chef nodded as he leaned against the counter, catching his breath. “Thank you, Chaz.” He waited quietly as he ticked through everyone in his head, making sure each person in the house was taken care of. Mark had come back, but only long enough to grab his own plate and another cupcake, so Brad had to assume that Jason was still down and not feeling well. The chef rubbed his chin before he snapped his fingers, remembering that Ryan hadn’t eaten dinner either. _I’ll go ahead and heat up his plate. I’m sure he’ll be wandering in here anytime now that the others are back._

Mike was more than halfway through his plate and feeling much better. He dropped his hand to touch Chester’s thigh, squeezing it gently without saying a word. A few more bites and he’d be finished, and from the looks of Chester’s plate, he was almost finished as well. He wanted to ask more about the club but decided he would wait until tomorrow. 

He watched Brad for a minute, trying to figure out why he was heating up another plate, before it dawned on him that someone must have asked for it. “Who’s that for?” he asked, pointing at the extra plate with no owner. It seemed like Chester was too busy with his ketchup to care what was happening in the kitchen.

“This one is for Ryan,” Brad answered. “He didn’t eat dinner and I’m sure he’s hungry, wherever he’s gotten off to.” He whistled a little tune as he arranged Ryan’s plate just a little better. “Usually he has a great appetite, but he’s been scarce tonight.” 

Chester looked up from his food as he swallowed down his large bite of potato. “Ry didn’t eat? He’s not sick, is he?” He looked between Brad and Mike, looking for an answer from either, since they’d both been in the house all night. 

“Um, I don’t know,” Mike said, gripping Chester’s leg a bit tighter as his eyes flicked to Brad. “He didn’t say. I think maybe he was tired, or something.” He waited for Brad to turn away before he shot Chester a look of warning. Brad was the only person in the house - other than Noah - that didn’t know about Ryan and Jason. 

Chester licked his lips. “What are you looking at me for?” he asked, just as Mike’s grip on his leg tightened even more, and the message came out of nowhere, like it had smacked Chester in the face. “Oh! Right!” he cheered happily at the revelation. “Because he’s with -” But before he could get the rest of his sentence out, Ryan came trotting down the stairs, the sight of him bringing reality back to Chester’s slowed mental state. He watched as Ryan waved to him and Mike before he entered the kitchen and crooned over how good the food smelled. Chester leaned close to Mike. “It’s because he was with Jason all night,” he whispered, like he was informing his boyfriend of something new. 

Mike nodded, relieved that Chester hadn’t blurted everything out in the kitchen with Brad four steps away. He stuck his last potato in his mouth and watched Ryan for a second. It probably wasn’t obvious to anyone else, but MIke could see a difference in his posture just from having had the alone time with Jason. His shoulders were just a little straighter and his steps seemed lighter. _I know that feeling. Like being on top of the world. I wonder how long that will last before he realizes that Jason is stuck back there with Mark._ He shivered involuntarily and his hand went from Chester’s thigh to the back of his neck in a soft caress. _At least I get to take him upstairs and we’ll be together. Thank god it’s just us._

Ryan was just a few feet away, his attention on Brad and the plate of food that was being warmed up for him. He was hungry - starving to a lesser degree - and he was ready to gobble down the dinner he’d missed. _It was totally worth it. I’d miss every meal if that meant more time with Jay._ He let out a soft sigh as his thoughts drifted to his boyfriend the time they’d just had together. The words they’d exchanged, along with quite a few laughs and the ultimate moment when their bodies had joined together into one. 

Ryan rubbed his forehead just as he heard Chester giggling, and Ryan looked over to see Mike tickling the back of his neck. Ryan felt his shoulders slump just slightly at the sight of their flirting right out in the open. _That’s what I want. I want to sit here with Jay and eat our dinner together while we act like that._ His heart felt a little heavy but he tossed that away and cleared his throat. No use pining for flirtatious meals at the moment. Instead he’d sit next to Chester and dine with friends, which was always a nice second choice. “Brad, I’ll be right back,” he said, catching the chef’s attention. “Gotta hit the head first.” He spun around and headed down the hallway toward the bathroom. 

Mike looked up as Ryan took off, then reached over his empty plate to snag two cupcakes. “Come on, now’s the perfect time to make an exit. Nobody’s paying us any attention.” He stood up, a cupcake in each hand, and motioned upstairs. “Let’s go.” 

Chester slurped one last dab of ketchup from his fork before he let it clang to his plate. “Okay,” he agreed, licking his lips. “I’m ready for another one of those. They look as amazing as they taste.” He lifted his eyebrows toward Mike before he scooted off his barstool, his body feeling much more stable now with a full stomach. He motioned for Mike to go first, and he followed right behind him up the stairs. 

For some reason, Mike was trying to be stealthy. He didn’t say anything as they crept up the stairs and into their bedroom, and he felt the smile busting off his face the entire time. _I feel like we’re breaking the rules in our parents house or something. Cupcakes in the bedroom._ He laughed at himself as he stood just inside the bedroom, watching Chester come inside and promptly stick his hand out for a cupcake. 

“I’ll take mine,” Chester said, motioning for Mike to hand over his half of the treats. “I can already taste it.” He ran his tongue over his lips and his piercing. He would have been slobbering, but he was trying to control himself. 

“Nope,” Mike answered playfully, bumping the bedroom door closed with his hip and carefully locking it with his elbow. He couldn’t help but laugh at the surprised and annoyed look on his boyfriend’s face when he refused to give up the cupcake. “Put your hands in your lap or sit on them or something,” he instructed, nodding his head toward the bed. “I want you to sit down.” 

Chester narrowed his eyes. “But if I’m sitting on my hands, how I am supposed to eat my cupcake? You’ve been drinking, haven’t you?” he asked with a giggle, pointing a finger right at Mike before he went to the bed and sat down like he was supposed to. He tucked his hands under his legs. 

Mike shook his head. “You know the answer to that.” He set one cupcake down on the dresser and took the few steps over to where Chester was sitting as he pulled the wrapper off the cupcake and lifted it to his nose, breathing in deeply. “Damn, that smells good. And this frosting, look at how fluffy and perfect it is.” He wiggled the cupcake a little bit as he stopped between Chester’s knees and held it out. “You want a taste?”

Chester looked up, his focus shooting from the cupcake to Mike’s ornery looking face. “Yes, please,” he said, squeezing Mike between his legs. “I’m ready.” He opened his mouth. 

“Don’t worry if you get frosting everywhere,” Mike added, bringing the cupcake close enough for Chester to get a lick or a bite, whichever he wanted. “I _want_ you to get frosting everywhere so I can lick it off of you.” He quirked an eyebrow at Chester and felt his pulse quicken just a little. The idea of licking the pink fluffy sweetness off his boyfriend was enticing. 

Chester waited, saving his bite for a second. “Really? Feeling kinky?” He didn’t wait for an answer before he took a quick lick of the sweet frosting. He swallowed it down, and then he took a true bite, making sure to smear some of the pink on his chin and the side of his lips. “You can lick me even where there isn’t any frosting,” he mumbled between bites. 

“Oh, I plan to,” Mike whispered, watching Chester make a mess of the frosting on his face as he finished off the cupcake. “I don’t think I even want mine yet.” He let Chester swallow before he pressed a hand to his chest and pushed him lightly. “Scoot back,” he said, and as his lover complied he climbed onto the bed, his knees on either side of Chester’s hips. “Look at you,” he admonished sweetly. “You’ve got this pink stuff all over your face.” Before Chester could say a word he was leaned over, placing small kisses on his neck and around behind his ear. Mike took his time, kissing over every clean bit of skin he could reach until all that was left were sweet pink spots. The first frosting covered place he wanted was the corner of Chester’s mouth, and he stuck his tongue out to lap up the frosting that was there before he kissed Chester properly. Everything tasted like sugary strawberries. 

The moment Mike’s lips touched his, Chester’s hand raised to his boyfriend’s side. “Mmmmm,” he moaned softly, taking in Mike’s soft lip embrace. His fingers found the small strip of skin of Mike’s lower back where his shirt had pulled up. He petted over his lover’s skin for a moment, pulling in the warmth before he shoved his hand down the back of Mike’s pajama bottoms, just enough to touch his ass. 

Their kiss broke, and Chester turned his head just a enough to start another one. His eyes were closed, his thoughts far from the night he’d had with Mark and Amir at the club. He’d already decided he wasn’t going to tell his boyfriend about what had _really_ happened. There was no reason to tell him. It would just send Mike into a panic or maybe worse, and that was the last thing Chester wanted. It had all been for work, and that was where Chester planned to leave it. 

Mike pulled his lips away from Chester’s and finished licking and kissing all the frosting off his face. He braced himself on his elbows and petted his hands over Chester’s head as he looked down at him. “Cupcakes are pretty sexy, huh?” he asked, his eyes traveling over Chester’s kiss-swollen lips that were now clean of all the pink frosting. 

Chester squeezed Mike’s butt cheek. “ _You_ make them sexy,” he told him. “We should do this at home more.” 

“Anything you want,” Mike agreed, leaning down to lose himself in another kiss. He could relax now that Chester was back in his arms. They had all the time they wanted for the second cupcake.

Back downstairs, Ryan stepped into the kitchen, ready for his dinner. “Brad, this looks great,” he offered the chef. He swiped a hand over his dark spiked hair before he picked his plate up and took a dramatic smell of it. “I hope you left me some ketchup, Chazzy,” he said, as he turned, ready to sit with his friend, but stopped. His bright smile dropped as he stared at the empty seats where Chester and Mike had been sitting just two minutes ago. “Where did they go?” he asked, turning back to Brad. 

“They took a couple of cupcakes and headed upstairs,” he answered, before he snapped his fingers. “Speaking of which, here.” He nabbed a strawberry cupcake from the platter and popped it on the edge of Ryan’s dinner plate. “There’s plenty if you want a second one.” He quickly patted Ryan on the arm. “Everyone’s been fed, and the kitchen is clean, so I’m off to bed. Just leave your plate in the sink. I’ll get it in the morning,” he instructed with a yawn before he headed for his private room. 

Amir passed Brad on his way back into the kitchen with his empty plate. He made it all the way to the sink to rinse off the little bit of ketchup left before he noticed Ryan at the bar, alone. “What happened to Chaz and Mike?”

Ryan had both his hands on the bar, on either side of his untouched plate. He didn’t bother to look up. “They left. They went up to bed. With _cupcakes_.” He spit the last word a little more than he’d intended. 

“So?” Amir asked without even looking at Ryan. He left his plate in the sink and wiped his hands on the kitchen towel before he realized that cupcakes weren’t the actual problem. Ryan looked like he’d just been notified that his dog had died. “Hey,” he said in a softer tone, stepping up to the other side of the bar, across from Ryan. “You okay?” 

Ryan shook his head, his fingers digging into the granite countertop. “It’s not fair,” he whispered, his chest heaving a little as something started to boil in his stomach. “That bastard is back there with Jay,” he said, finally looking up to meet Amir’s questioning face. “And I can’t do anything about it. I have to stay out here and . . .we don’t get to sit and eat together or even sit out in the open and talk. I can’t, I can’t put my arm around him. And now Chaz is gone, too.” He looked away and back down at his dinner. “I don’t get to see him like I used too, ever since Mike’s been around. It’s just one more fucking thing I can’t have.” 

He shoved himself away from the counter and headed toward the living room. Devon and Caleb had long since abandoned the space, having taken their cupcakes and fled. But Noah was still in the oversized armchair, snoring. Ryan barely glanced at him as he headed for the patio doors. He flipped the latch and shoved the slider open before he balled his fist and hit the wall right by the door. He felt the sadness and frustration leave with his punch, as stinging set in. He cursed himself as he stepped out into the cooler night air of the deck. 

Amir looked around the room and sighed. He was on his own, and emotionally out of his depth. Of all the people at YRS, he did care about Ryan, but showing that was a whole different thing. He followed him out onto the deck and stopped, watching for a minute as Ryan gulped in breaths. 

Silently he walked over to stand next to Ryan, whose hands were clutching the deck railing as he looked out into the darkness. Amir dropped his hands on the railing next to Ryan’s, not touching, but close, and looked out at the trees with him while he decided what to say. “I know it sucks,” he finally offered, his voice low. “I honestly don’t know how you do it, Ry.” They didn’t say anything for a minute, and Amir added, “I don’t know how Jason does it either. I can see it in his face sometimes. He wants to be with you, too. The whole situation is fucked up.” 

The night air was doing well at settling Ryan’s nerves, and his grip on the railing relaxed a little. “I don’t know how much longer I can keep this up.” He stopped, his eyes closing. “I don’t mean that. I would never leave him or break things off or whatever. I just get so frustrated. It’s more than that. It makes my heart hurt like someone kicked it.” He lifted one hand to his chest, his fingers smoothing into the material of his black t-shirt. 

Amir looked down before he reached to cover Ryan’s hand with his own. “I’m sorry,” he said sincerely, squeezing Ryan’s hand a little. “You guys are so close, you know? I mean, I know a year is a long time, but at least you know where the ending is, right? And you’re making plans and figuring out how it will be later. You just have to stick through the rough patch.” He sighed, feeling like an idiot for trying to give advice. “I don’t know anything about real relationships, but I can tell you both really love each other. And it will work out, okay?” 

Ryan nodded as he let out a deep breath. He didn’t want to cry. Not in front of Amir. But he could already feel the wet place in the corner of his eye. “I know. And it will. . .I hope. I’m free in a year, but we’re not sure how Jay’s going to get out with me.” His headed darted around as he looked back at the house, and the bright light shining onto that side of the deck from the living room. The door was still closed, no one was there watching or listening. 

“You remember what happened,” he whispered, “when Jay tried to leave him before. He’s worried it will happen like that again.” 

“Jason needs a good lawyer,” Amir said seriously. “If he’s leaving… _when he leaves_ ,” he corrected, “you both need somewhere to go off the radar, and he needs a damn good lawyer. And a plan. Especially if he thinks Mark will drag him back again.” Amir shivered as he said the word ‘drag’. In most cases it would be a figure of speech, but not in this case. Not when it came to Mark.

“We don’t know any lawyers that aren’t connected to Mark,” Ryan mumbled before his head lifted, and his eyes brightened just slightly. “Well, there’s Mike’s dad. But I don’t know if Jay wants to go there. And we don’t have anywhere to disappear to.” He stood himself up straight, letting his hands go to his hips as he continued to look at the dark woods in front of him. “He would find us anywhere in L.A. Probably anywhere in California. He’s like a damn bloodhound when it comes to Jay.” 

Amir nodded as he looked over at Ryan. “I know. He’s fucking insane.” He didn’t know what else to say, so he didn’t. He just looked out into the darkness, thinking, the chill from the night air sinking into his bones. “Come on,” he decided, turning back toward the house. “You should come eat. You’ll feel better.” 

Food was the last thing on Ryan’s mind, but his stomach was in for it. “Yeah,” he agreed. “I need to.” He silently followed Amir back inside, glancing at the wall where he’d punched it, and he inwardly cringed at the dent that was left in his wake. _Fuck. Explaining that won’t be nice._ He rubbed his hand over his face as he headed for the kitchen anyway. He’d think of something to tell Mark tomorrow. Right now the plan was much more simple. He would sit at the bar, eat his food, and then go to bed alone. _Like I do every night._

Back in the master bedroom, Jason was equally miserable. He was laying on his side, the sheets balled up in his fists under his chin and his eyes closed as he listened to Mark move around the bedroom. He’d stayed as still as possible while Mark ate, declining his offer for any bites. His mind was still with Ryan and their moments in the same bed earlier, the marshmallows and their lazy lovemaking. Pretending to have a headache was easy when he felt as low as he did. The heartache he was feeling was just as incapacitating as the worst headache he’d ever had. 

Mark stood just in front of the bed, his clean clothes for the shower draped over his arm. “Jason, I’m going to jump in the shower. I smell like people.” He popped a soft smile across his face as he waited for Jason to chuckle at his joke, but it didn’t happen. Mark’s attention on his husband’s face sharpened. Jason’s eyes were squeezed closed, like the pounding in his head was really doing a number on him. Mark knew he hadn’t eaten, and as Jason laid under the sheet, holding it tightly, Mark couldn’t help but notice how small and frail he looked. He stepped up to the bed, and turned around to sit on the edge, right in front of Jason’s legs. “You sure I can’t get you anything to help? When did you take Tylenol last? I can get you some more.” He looked at his wrist, but he’d already taken his watch off for the shower. 

“No, it’s okay,” Jason answered slowly. “I took some right before you got home.” He didn’t bother to open his eyes. He didn’t want to see Mark. “I just need to sleep it off.” The message couldn’t be any clearer. Jason just wanted to be left alone with his thoughts of Ryan and the ghost of his touches lingering on his skin. “I’ll be fine,” he said, pushing his face into the pillow. 

Mark watched him, and the total lack of eye contact he was getting. He pursed his lips as he put his hand on Jason’s hip, on top of the sheet. He sprawled his fingers out and then back a few times. “I hate seeing you like this. You really do need to see a doctor when we get home.” He waited, but there was no response. He looked down at his night clothes that were now lying on his lap. _I can’t have him like this. If he’s still down with his migraine in the morning, we’ll lose shooting time. Usually they don’t last more than a few hours. It’s already been more than that._

He looked back at Jason’s face, ready to say something else encouraging, but stopped. Black floppy strands of Jason’s hair had fallen into his face, and Mark leaned forward to swipe them away. “Have you drank enough?” he asked, his gaze shifting to the nightstand. There was an empty glass, and Mark frowned. “Maybe you just need to drink some water. Dehydration causes headaches,” he mumbled as he stood up and took the glass. “I’ll bring you some before I get in the shower.” 

With the glass in hand, Mark stepped to the end of the bed to lay his clothes down. There was no reason to drag them all the way to the kitchen with him. He let out a sigh as Jason stayed still as a corpse. The room was dark, other than the one lamp on the bedside table, and for a moment Mark thought about turning that off as well. _He always says the lights hurt when he’s like this._ He went to walk around the other side of the bed for get to it, just as something small and white caught his attention. He stopped, his posture straightening as he eyed the little white anomaly among the dark bed sheets. He looked back at Jason, but his husband had his back to him. Mark reached down and picked it up, the soft marshmallow squishing between his fingers. _How did this get here? I hate marshmallows. Jason said he hadn’t eaten anything. . .he wouldn’t eat marshmallows._ He smashed the miniature treat a little tighter between his fingertips as he looked around the bed, but he couldn’t spot anymore. His thoughts rolled over a few other possibilities and scenarios that could possibly involve marshmallows in the bedroom while he was gone, but nothing made sense.

He let out a harsh sigh as his gaze landed on Jason’s back, the idea that maybe his husband wasn’t as sick as he claimed tickling his thoughts. 

****  
TBC


	42. Seattle Part Five: Tables Turned

Chester stood in front of the bathroom vanity, one hand pressed to his red-tipped mohawk, his other teasing the stiff hairs between his fingers. He fumbled with it a second more before he dropped his arms to his sides and stared at himself in the mirror above one of the double sinks. He gazed over his hair, and then the simple silver chain necklace he’d put on in a whim. It had a peace sign pendant, which made him smile every time he caught sight of it. He pressed his hands down the front of his silky feeling long sleeved black shirt that hugged his body. A white stripe ran across the belly, and accentuated his slender frame. A well placed rip on the upper thigh of his form fitting dark jeans topped off his outfit in his mind, and he shot himself a full toothed grin before he turned to leave the bathroom. _I’m so ready to go out. Not like the other night with Mark, but really go out on the town with Sexy Boy._ He practically skipped the rest of the way down the hall, before he stepped into the room he was sharing with his boyfriend. 

Mike was just putting on his shoe when Chester came barrelling into the room. He looked up with a grin, taking in his boyfriend’s carefully put together appearance. Even when he tried, Mike was never sure if he managed to live up to Chester’s fashion standards, and tonight he was even less sure. _But it’s Seattle. Flannel is in style here._ He shoved his foot into his black boot and looked down at himself. Somehow during the months of dating Chester he’d ended up with what his boyfriend called “fashionably ripped jeans.” He knew they were a favorite, so he’d tossed those on with his black and dark gray checkered flannel that he thought looked nice enough over his black t-shirt when it was buttoned up. It wasn’t as hot as Chester’s outfit, but it never was. 

“You look super hot,” Mike said, his eyes back on Chester. “I’m like, the luckiest guy ever.” He reached over and pulled Chester into a quick hug. “Do you know which restaurant you’d like to go to, yet? Seafood or Italian?” They’d already looked up restaurants close to where they’d be taking a ferry ride later, and Mike had left it up to Chester to choose which one sounded best. Either was fine with him, he was always starving. 

Chester wrapped his arms around Mike’s waist as they stayed close. “I think we should go Seafood. I never eat it at home, so since we’re up here in the land of fishing, we should check it out. I asked Brad, and he suggested the one with the outdoor patio.” Chester wet his lips before he let Mike go and took a step back. “Which I think would be neat as long as it doesn’t start raining.” He took a moment to look his boyfriend up and down, his concerned face flipping to something pleased. “I love you in those jeans,” he stated slyly. “Remind me to rip them off of you later.” 

“I hope I don’t have to remind you,” Mike replied, narrowing his eyes. “I’m definitely doing this date wrong if I have to tell you to take my clothes off.” He patted his pockets, feeling for his wallet and his phone, before he said, “I don’t really want to sit on the patio. I was thinking inside. It’s supposed to be really nice. Romantic, like candlelight and all that. I don’t want to be outside, I want the romance.” He held his hand out for Chester to take as he stepped toward the door. 

“I’m so glad to hear you say that. I didn’t want to sit outside anyway. Patios and Seattle don’t mix for me,” Chester said as he took his boyfriend’s hand, squeezing it. “And you could never do a date wrong. You’re the one that taught _me_ about dating, remember?” Chester had to laugh as he rolled his eyes while they headed for the stairs. “God, I was pathetic. That seems so long ago.” 

Mike pulled Chester’s hand to his lips and kissed the back softly. “You weren’t pathetic. You just needed someone to show you how good it could be. Slow you down a bit.” He smiled over at his boyfriend and took the last step with a bit of a hop, his excitement already showing. It was going to feel great to get out of the house for a little while. 

“If you’re ready, I should go ahead and call a ride for us,” Mike said, dropping Chester’s hand to wiggle his phone out of his front pocket. He was already clicking the uber app on his phone when Ryan appeared out of nowhere, a huge grin on his face. 

“Guys, guys,” Ryan said, flapping both his hands through the air as he practically bounced up to them. “Mark’s gone,” he announced. Every single tooth he owned was showing as he looked from Mike to Chester. “He’s gone all night. He just left a few minutes ago, announcing he was going out for the night and wouldn’t be back till late and how we need to _be on our best behavior for Jason and Brad_ ,” Ryan mocked with air quotes. “I hate him,” he seethed quickly before adding, “so we’re free for the whole night! Me and Jay, I mean, and, well, we thought it would be really nice to go out and since we’re in a city where no one knows us, we can. And. . .” 

Chester was already looking back and forth between Mike and Ryan, knowing exactly what was about to come out of his friend’s mouth. He thought about offering the invite, but he stopped himself, knowing Mike might not be okay with that. This was supposed to be _their_ romantic date, after all. 

“That is, me and Jay,” Ryan continued as he looked just over Chester’s shoulder to see Jason headed their way. “If you guys wouldn’t mind, could we tag along with you to dinner and the ferry ride? Chaz told me all about your plans,” he said, turning right to Mike. “If we go with you, then if somehow Mark finds out, then it’s a group thing and not a date thing.” 

Mike hesitated just for a moment, looking down at the open app on his phone. He knew Chester would say yes. And he didn’t hate Jason, or Ryan, but it was supposed to be their time. _That’s pretty selfish of you, Mike. They never get to have any time. And I get Chester all the time._ He managed a smile as he looked over at Chester. “What do you think, babe? I’m fine if they want to come. I haven’t gotten us a ride yet, we’ll just get a bigger car.” He turned his eyes to Ryan. “But we’re having seafood for dinner. I know some people don’t like seafood. Is that okay with you guys?”

Ryan’s blue eyes flashed over to Chester’s, the two of them agreeing without saying anything. He knew Chester would never say no, and the grin and nod he’d made the moment Mike had said yes was enough. “Seafood is great,” Ryan said in a hurry. “Chaz, _Mike_ ,” he emphasized, “thank you so much! We’ll go get ready while the car’s coming!” He spun around, and bounded back across the room, swooping right into Jason and spinning him around in a goofy little half dance as he told him the good news. 

Chester turned to his boyfriend. “Thanks, Mike,” he said softly, slinking his arm around his waist before he kissed his cheek. “That was really nice of you.” 

“He looked so excited, I just… I’m glad we can help,” Mike said, leaning his head against Chester’s. “I’d hate it if I couldn’t go out in public with you. Or spend time with you when I wanted. It would make me crazy.”

“I don’t even want to think about that,” Chester mumbled before he nuzzled Mike’s ear and wrapped his lips around the gold hoop earring that was dangling there for a second. “Call for the car, I’m going to go make sure Brad knows the four of us are leaving.” 

“Got it,” Mike said, waving his phone at his boyfriend’s retreating back. All it took was two more taps and their ride would be on the way. He considered upgrading to a nicer car, but the wait was longer and it was twice as much, so the initial SUV he’d selected would have to do. 

Chester headed back up the steps and down the hall to the private room where the chef was lodging for this trip. The door was closed, and Chester was sure to knock. He heard Brad’s voice from the other side, and Chester popped the door open, stepping in halfway. He glanced around at the smaller room, which was still elegant looking like the rest of the house, but with half the space of the other bedrooms. “Hey,” Chester said, focusing on Brad, who was sitting on the bed, cross-legged as he held his hands in prayer stance in front of him. “I’m not interrupting, am I?” He’d seen Brad mediate countless times, and he knew the cook could hold conversations while doing it. 

Brad opened one eye. “Of course not. Come in.” He slowly moved one arm away and to the side, motioning for Chester to join him on the bed. 

“No, no, I don’t want to disturb you. I just wanted to let you know that me and Mike, Ry, and Jason are heading out for a little bit.” 

Brad’s other eye popped open as he dropped both hands to the dark blue blanket he was sitting on. “The four of you are going out?” 

It was an innocent question, but Chester felt his breath hitch just the same. He knew he had to be careful with how he worded things. He loved Brad to pieces - admired him even - but he was also Mark’s cousin, and one of the only people in the YRS family who didn’t know about Jason and Ryan’s affair. “Yeah,” he answered, staying in the doorway. “For like a little business meeting. Mark’s out for the night and Jason wants to run over some. . .schedules,” he lied with a swallow. “And he, well, since me and Mike were going out anyway. . .” 

Brad twitched a little. “Oh yes, you and Mike were supposed to have a romantic evening out. Jason shouldn’t be horning in on it for business. That’s not right, Chester. I’ll say something to him,” he decided as he went to get up. He wasn’t the best at telling Mark when he was crossing lines into the boys’ personal time, but he could say something to Jason. “Sometimes he gets so caught up in the work, he just doesn’t think,” Brad shamed with a click of his tongue and a toss of his curly hair. 

“Well, no,” Chester rushed to say as he took another step into the room, and then another. His hands were out. “Brad, it’s fine. Actually, he, he asked us and Mike said it was okay.” Chester could feel sweat starting to form on various places of his body, and he hated that. “Besides, you know, between us,” he said, motioning now like he was about to tell Brad a secret, “I think Jason just needs a night out, too. You know?” 

Brad was halted by the side of the bed, his eyes locked with Chester. “Yes,” he said slowly. “I suppose so.” He stood for a moment, looking the other man up and down, trying to get a good read on him. “I’m not seeing anything bad in your aura,” he announced, and there was a distinct sign of relief in his voice. “Yes, yes, this is a good thing. I can see it,” he decided. “The four of you are meant to go out.” He smiled wide as he headed for the door, where Chester was looking a little shocked. “You have my blessing. All of you. Go, have fun, Chaz.” 

Before Chester could get out the door, Brad was patting his shoulder, and diving into aura explanations that were somehow coming out all over the place. But it didn’t matter. Brad had bought his fib, and now they were all going to get to go out and enjoy a night in a new city. _Adventure. That’s what it will be. An adventure._

****

Jason had already decided what he wanted to eat, but he stayed hidden behind his menu, stealing glances at Ryan in the candlelight. It was hard to believe their good fortune, that Mark had disappeared for the evening with no explanation, and that Mike and Chester had agreed to let them come along. The restaurant was nice, like Mike said it would be, but Jason didn’t care. He’d eaten in some of the finest restaurants in LA since he’d been tethered to Mark. The restaurant didn’t matter as much as the company.

He watched Ryan’s eyebrows furrow as he looked over the menu and smiled. The few times they’d managed to go out, his lover had been indecisive about his selection, and tonight was no different. Jason reached over and rested his hand on Ryan’s forearm, revelling in the fact that he was touching him out in the open, not secretly under the white tablecloth. 

“Ry? Know what you want to eat, yet?” 

The moment Jason’s hand was on him, Ryan looked up. He could tell Jason’s touch in the dark. “I’m back and forth,” he admitted. “I’m not crazy for seafood, but I know I should get some. But this steak looks good.” He smiled back at his lover. “What about you?” He moved his arm, so he could take Jason’s hand, even though he couldn’t stop the reflex of looking around quickly, like Mark could be popping out of nowhere somehow and they would need to be ready to spring apart. 

“I’m thinking scallops,” Jason answered, finally setting his menu aside. “Those are always best fresh, and these are bacon crusted. I know they’re going to be good.”

At the mention of bacon, Mike looked up. “Bacon crusted scallops? Hmm, I might have to change my mind.” He looked back down at the menu, searching for the scallops. He read the description, and then the price, and decided he’d stick with his lobster ravioli. They’d had bacon at breakfast, anyway. “I guess I’ll stick with the lobster ravioli,” he said, even though he hadn’t been asked. “What are you having, Ches? We could always get these little fried crabs as an appetizer if you want one.” 

Chester was looking at his menu, his tongue playing over his piercing as he thought. He wasn’t very familiar with a lot of the dishes he was reading through and already he was making a mental note to start adding seafood to his and Mike’s diet at least once a week so he could learn how to make some of the intriguing entries. “Ravioli, huh?” he mumbled just as he spotted it on the menu. “I love ravioli. I think I’ll have that, too.” He put his menu down, his mind made up, which felt like a relief. Like he’d just passed a test of some sort. 

“I think I’ll get us a bottle of wine,” Jason said thoughtfully, thinking about what everyone had ordered. “White works for all of us except you, Ry. You can order whichever red you want, I’ll get the white. You can have the whole bottle if you want it,” he added, knowing Ryan would only order a glass even though he was paying for dinner. 

Ryan looked up from his menu. “I know there’s white and red rules,” he said, “but I think I’m going to get this 4 ounce steak with the coconut shrimp. . .so which wine does that take?” He scratched his head as he looked from the description of his meal choice to his boyfriend, hoping he didn’t sound like a completely uncultured buffoon. 

Jason smiled. “It takes whatever you want, I guess. Steak is red, but shrimp is white, so whatever you want, Ry.” He looked over at Chester and Mike. Chester was listening, but Mike was looking at Chester. Jason knew he didn’t really drink anyway. “If you want white, I’ll get two bottles,” he decided. 

“I’ll go with red,” Ryan decided, confidence flooding back into him as he sat his menu aside. “I like it better, and if you get a bottle, Chaz can have some. He likes red better anyway.” He flashed his friend a knowing glance, and Chester nodded. 

“I do. I know it doesn’t go with lobster, but I’m a rebel. A rule breaker deviant,” he said with a goofy inflection. “I like to live on the wild side. I drink red with everything.” He slashed his hand through the air. “Damn the code.” He already had Jason and Ryan laughing as he looked over at Mike, hoping to at least get a smile from him, even though he knew alcohol could be a heated topic between them. 

Mike simply nodded, trying to be easy going for the evening. It wouldn’t do any good to argue about the wine, he’d just keep an eye on how much Chester drank. “I’m fine with whatever,” he offered. “I probably won’t have much, so get what you want. 

“One of each then,” Jason said, holding his hand up to summon the waiter. It was different, being the one in charge at the table. He could feel everyone’s attention on him as he ordered their wine, then two appetizers for the table - Mike’s fried crabs and fried calamari. If they were having seafood for dinner, he was going to go all out. 

The waiter went ahead and took their entree orders, each one in turn. He collected their menus, assuring them - Jason specifically - that their wine and appetizers would be out shortly. He gave a last glance over the unusual party at the table before he headed back to put their orders in. 

Ryan hadn’t paid any attention the waiter. He’d found himself in awe instead, as he watched Jason order everything so elegantly and with a confident tone in his voice. Ryan had been out to nice restaurants on the YRS budget before, but it was always Mark who took control and spoke to the wait staff. Seeing Jason be in charge made Ryan’s fingertips tingle and his stomach feel a little light. It was a side of his boyfriend he’d never seen. He wanted to say something to him, something along the lines of being impressed, but he wasn’t sure how to do that without sounding pathetic or worse, like he was being sarcastic. 

“Jay, man, thanks,” Chester offered, grabbing the table’s attention. “For ordering the wine and appetizers. I would have screwed that up,” he said with a soft laugh. “I can’t wait to try some of this stuff. I’ve never had fried calamari. Or even non-fried calamari,” he amended with a shrug. He wasn’t even sure what calamari was, but he was willing to give it a go. 

“They should go well with dinner,” Jason said before he looked back over at Ryan. “And calamari, it’s better fried. It will come out with a couple of different sauces to dip it into.”

Mike poked Chester in the side. “Sounds like your kind of dish. You’re more into condiments than anything else,” he teased. 

“Not all condiments,” Chester shot back, keeping his voice low and intimate. “Just the kick ass ones.” He looked away from Mike, his attention drifting over the other diners, and how properly they were dressed. Everyone was either in a suit or an evening gown of some sort, with flashy jewelry and expensive looking handbags. Each table had the intimate glow from the candles, and the music over head was soft. Chester couldn’t quite pick it out, but violins came to mind or some other stringed instrument. _Not that it matters. Mike would know, if I asked._ He looked over in time to see the couple sitting at a table not far way looking at them, and Chester instantly looked down at himself. _What? I look good._ He picked at his shirt, and then feathered his fingers over his mohawk as the older couple watched him. _Maybe not good for here though._ Something heavy started to settle over him as he tried to block out everyone else, and keep his focus on his friends instead. 

Mike had expected a little more playfulness back from Chester, but saw him duck his head down for a second instead. He could tell something was on his mind. He reached over and slid his hand across Chester’s shoulder blades in a light caress. Leaning close, he murmured in his ear, “everything okay?” He felt Ryan’s eyes on them but ignored the look, and then he heard Jason say something that took his attention away from them.

Chester nodded as he turned his head enough to catch sight of his lover. “Yeah, I’m fine,” he whispered back. “Just thinking. I’m fine.” He pushed a smile and sat himself up a little straighter. He wasn’t going to let his head ruin the evening. “I’m excited for ravioli,” he told Mike before he reached for his glass of water that had been brought out when they’d all sat down. 

“Mmm, it has garlic cream sauce on it,” Mike said, licking his lips. “I love cream sauces. I think those are my favorites.” He lifted his hand from Chester’s back, his fingers briefly skimming his neck. Jason and Ryan were discussing something he couldn’t hear, so he sat back and looked around the restaurant, waiting for them to finish. “This is the kind of place that really should have live music, Ches. Piano music. Or a string quartet. Something like that.” 

“You could play in a place like this,” Chester said immediately. “You’re so good, Mike. You know, later on. . .it would be fun, right? You’d get free food.” He tossed his boyfriend a smile. “And then you could bring me home whatever I wanted off the menu. You’d have to play somewhere I really liked.” 

Jason looked up as Mike giggled. “There’s a lot of places in LA with live music, Mike. Really nice places. You could probably even get into that now, if you wanted to.” He watched Mike take a sip of water and consider what he’d just said. It was nice to see him relaxed instead of on the high alert he always seemed to be on around Mark.

“Maybe,” Mike offered. “I really want to get my degree before I just settle into something somewhere. I could see myself teaching, like I used to, but I’d really love to perform. Not just in a place like this, maybe something bigger. I’m not sure what opportunities are out there, but I know I’d really like to go to school first.” He leaned an elbow on the table before he remembered where he was and pulled his arm back, settling back in his chair and looking at Chester.

“You’re going to ace school so hard,” Chester chimed in, beaming at Mike and then looking at the others. “You guys haven’t heard half of what he can do. He’s got this crap beat by a mile.” He pointed a finger up toward the unseen speakers in the ceiling. “You should do something where you can paint _and_ play music. That would be really neat. Maybe sell paintings of music notes!” he suggested with a bright smile and a nudge to Mike’s arm. 

“You’re so cute,” Mike said, leaning to leave a quick kiss on Chester’s cheek. “I don’t know if I could make paintings of music notes interesting enough for people to want to see them.” 

“I like the stuff you’ve done around the loft,” Ryan offered. “Some of the paintings Chaz has shown me.” He motioned toward Chester. “They’re really good.” He slid his hand over to Jason’s leg under the table, leaving all the normally rushed sensual squeezes and touches behind, and instead just letting it lay lazily there, like he could put his hand on Jason’s leg anytime he wanted. 

“The one of the beach, that one is really amazing,” Jason chimed in. He dropped his hand to cover Ryan’s, lacing their fingers together and enjoying the welcome heat on his thigh. “Have you ever thought about selling any of your work?”

Mike shook his head. “Nah, I don’t think I’m ready for anything like that. Painting is just a hobby. Music is the thing I really want to work harder at and develop more. It’s definitely what I see in my future.” 

“If you ever decide to sell them,” Ryan said, “I’d like the one with the oranges and blues. The one that looks like fire. Chaz showed it to me one day. It would look great in my bedroom. . .our future bedroom,” he said, looking Jason’s way. 

Jason nodded, pulling up the one memory he had of Ryan’s bedroom before he really registered what his lover had said. “Our future bedroom,” he repeated with emphasis. “I could definitely see something with those colors in our bedroom.” Even though he had no idea what the painting looked like that Ryan was talking about, the thought of sharing a room - decorating a room - with Ryan brought a smile to his lips. 

“He did another one with blue looking flames and ghosts,” Chester said. “It’s hanging in our bedroom. I’ll take you up there and show you, Ry, next time you’re over. And you, too, Jay,” he quickly added when he realized how one-sided his statement seemed. He got an acknowledgement from his boss, just as the waiter showed up with their wine and appetizers. 

All conversation stopped as glasses were handed around and drinks were poured. Two large platters were set down, one on each side of the candle centerpiece before the waiter asked them if everything looked okay. 

Jason surveyed the table, glancing at the wine and the appetizers before he looked up. “Yes, thank you.” He turned his attention back to Chester, effectively dismissing the waiter. “I don’t know when we’d be able to come over again, but I enjoyed it last time. It’s nice to get away.” He sat back and let the others take what they wanted from the appetizer platters in front of them, waiting until they were finished before he transferred calamari and crab to his small plate. 

Mike was looking skeptically at the calamari on his plate. It seemed almost criminal to have fried the squid, but he knew that Chester would be more likely to like it the first time with the thick fried batter covering it. He glanced over to see his boyfriend’s face crinkled in distress, and it was obvious immediately what the problem was - there was no ketchup on the table. 

“Jason?” Mike asked before Chester could say anything. “You remember what our waiter looks like, right?” He waited for Jason to nod before he went on. “When you see him, can you get him over here? Ches needs ketchup and, well, usually the places we go bring ketchup out with the meal, if it’s not on the table.” 

Chester nodded, both to Jason and to Mike. He wasn’t sure how, but Mike had just read his mind. He looked down at his plate. It didn’t even look appetizing without any ketchup to douse it in. He decided quickly to wait, as he folded his hands into his lap, watching as Ryan poked his fork at the calamari. 

“It’s good with the white sauce,” Mike said, pointing his fork at the small sauce dish. “It’s like a lemon-basil sauce, or something. And the other is marinara. You like marinara,” he encouraged. 

“Yeah, marinara is okay,” Chester mumbled as he silently pined for his ketchup. He looked around at the other tables, but he didn’t see any ketchup bottles that he could borrow until they got their own. He slumped a little in his chair as he looked at the dish of the white creamy stuff Mike had pointed to. “How do you know?” he asked, turning to look at his boyfriend. “You going out to dinner to these kind of places behind my back?” he asked with a light chuckle. 

Mike popped a bite in his mouth and lifted his eyebrow. “I ate in places like this all the time growing up, Ches. Birthdays, celebrations, special occasions… my parents liked to go out.” He shrugged. “It’s really pretty good, I promise. You should try it. You, too,” he said, turning his attention to Ryan, who had yet to try the fried squid. 

“I don’t know, Mike,” Ryan mumbled as he looked from plate to plate and how Jason hadn’t flinched when it came to the sauces. He’d already dipped his multiple times in both of them. “I think I’ll wait on the ketchup with Chaz.” 

“Ketchup makes everything better,” Chester quickly championed, and Ryan was ready to give him a high-five across the table for Team Ketchup. 

Mike rolled his eyes. “If you tried something other than ketchup you might actually like it,” he said, even though he didn’t really care. Chester could drown every item on every plate of food he ate for the rest of his life, and Mike would let him. 

“Ketchup is the lifeblood, Mike,” Chester was quick to argue. “It’s like the great equalizer. No matter what you’re putting it on, it then tastes like ketchup.” He gestured toward his plate of untouched food. “Which is awesome since ketchup tastes like magic in a bottle.” 

“And that’s my point,” Mike shot back. “You should want to taste what you’re eating. How can you be satisfied with everything tasting like ketchup? That’s like being okay with wearing the same shirt every day.” He grinned, figuring he’d gotten Chester with a fashion analogy. 

Chester gasped dramatically. “Mike,” he said, his mouth hanging open. “This is _nothing_ like that. You just don’t understand ketchup at all. And it’s not meant for everything,” he relented a little. “But when it’s called for, it’s the fucking best.” 

Ryan was quick to agree. “Yes, yes, yes,” he chanted, pointing at Chester enthusiastically. “Certain things just _need_ to have an ample amount of ketchup on them to make them taste right.” 

At some point during the ketchup debate, Jason flagged down the waiter and asked for an ample amount to be brought to the table, but his companions were too caught up in the conversation to notice. There was an obvious difference in Ryan and Chester, and Mike, and Jason couldn’t help but think again how similar he and Mike really were. _I didn’t grow up with rich parents, though. I learned all this through Mark. I was like Ryan when I first started dating Mark. I had no clue about wine pairings and fancy sauces and stuff like that. I’ll have to teach him. Well, I’ll teach him if we have any money after I leave. We never talk about money. I have no idea if Ryan saves any or spends every penny he gets. And I have no idea if I’ll leave with anything. Knowing Mark, I’ll leave with exactly what I had when I met him. Nothing. It won’t matter what was bought or earned after we got married. He’ll figure out a way to keep it all._

Jason set his fork on the edge of his plate and picked up his wine. It was hard not to let thoughts of Mark interfere with the evening, especially when there was casual talk of the future happening and Jason knew he’d never told Ryan about the prenuptial agreement he’d signed. _I’m going to have to tell him, soon. It’s only fair that he knows what the future is really going to look like. We won’t be eating in places like this._ None of the lifestyle considerations worried him, but he wasn’t sure if it would be a deal breaker for Ryan or not. Deep down he didn’t really think it would be, but money would have made things easier.

Chester grabbed his wine glass, taking a large gulp of the lush red alcohol, just as the waiter appeared at the table. He was about to open his mouth and ask for a bottle of ketchup, but before he could, three dishes of ketchup were sat down in front of him. The waiter politely asked if there was anything else needed, but Jason assured him they were fine after thanking him for the ketchup. 

“I wanted a bottle,” Chester mumbled as he took another drink of wine before he set it down and snatched one of the dishes. “Ry, we’ll split the third one,” he said, his eyes flashing up to see Ryan doing almost a picture perfect copy of what he was doing - spooning ketchup over everything on his plate. 

Mike watched as Ryan and Chester drizzled ketchup over everything on their plates, and refrained from suggesting that maybe dipping things in the ketchup would be nicer in a place like this, though the words were on the tip of his tongue. Instead, he waited for Chester to finish dividing the third dish of katchup between him and Ryan before he shot his boyfriend an indulgent smile. “Better? Now you have to try it. It’s good,” he encouraged, poking another calamari ring with his fork and popping it in his mouth.

“Don’t rush me, Sexy Boy,” Chester said before he licked a glob of ketchup from his fork. “I’m getting there.” He picked up his wine glass and took another sip before carefully slicing a chunk of fried crab leg to test it out, now that it was drowned in his favorite sauce. 

“I’m not rushing,” Mike denied. “I just want to know what you think.” He reached to put more of both appetizers on his plate before he looked over at Ryan. “I’m surprised you got your fair share of ketchup. This one over here goes through bottles of it at home like it’s water.” He nudged Chester with his elbow just as he tried the crab. 

Ryan smiled as he watched Chester feign being upset. “I know how to get what’s mine,” he said, his gaze shifting to meet Mike’s eyes. “Chaz and I have thrown down over ketchup before.” 

“It’s true,” Chester agreed after he’d swallowed down his bite of crab. “And I’m going to say. . .it’s a little salty. But it’s okay.” He tossed Mike an ornery grin. “I think the ketchup helps.” 

“What do you think, Ry?” Jason asked, watching his lover follow Chester’s movements almost exactly. Both their plates were criss-crossed in the red stuff, and he thought it was endearing. Calamari was an acquired taste, he supposed. 

“They’re pretty good,” Ryan decided after his second bite. “But I don’t think I’d order them on my own. I’ll be ready for my steak when it gets here.” He scooped up his glass and gulped down a quarter of the red wine, licking his lips. “Now _that’s_ really good.” 

“I’m glad you like it.” Jason smiled and leaned over, thrilled that he could kiss Ryan out in the open, in front of everyone, any time the mood hit. It was just a quick kiss since they were in a nice restaurant, but it was meaningful. They didn’t have to hide their relationship while they were here, and that was better than wine or expensive seafood any day, in Jason’s book. Even if Chester and Mike were there too, their company didn’t take away from the fact that the only thing in Jason’s world was Ryan. Anything beyond the four of them at their table was just white noise, a blurred background of meaningless, faceless people. Tonight was all about Ryan.

A few tables away, the waiter was just seating another couple. “Here you are, gentleman,” he said, motioning for them to get comfortable at the intimate round table. “I’ll be back in just a moment for your drink orders. 

Mark opened his menu. “I’m in the mood for wine,” he said, before he looked over at his dinner date for the evening, the same young man who had caught his attention at the club a few nights before. “Do you have a preference?”

“I don’t have a lot of experience with wine,” Kevin said as he looked over the menu and all the high price tags on everything. 

“Oh, don’t worry,” Mark said sweetly as he reached over and caressed the young man’s arm, “this is on me. Don’t even look at the prices. I just want us to have a nice meal together so we can get to know each other better.” 

It was the same line he’d used on countless men over the years, and it always worked. A nice restaurant and flattery went a long way. Mark was about to add in a compliment - the way Kevin’s eyes shined by the candlelight or how his fingernails were so well cared for, but his head turned when he heard a familiar laugh instead. 

It only took seconds for him to spot the four familiar faces. His eyes widened a little at the sight of his husband, and the smile that was busting off his face. _Why is here. . .with them?_ On impulse he went to stand up, ready to march across the restaurant and ask what was going on, but Kevin’s voice brought him back to reality. 

“This swordfish sounds good,” he said, pointing at the menu. “I’ve never had it, but I’ve always wanted to try some. Mark? Are you okay?” he asked. He looked across the space, trying to see what had stolen his date’s attention, but he couldn’t see anything other than other diners until he spotted the bright red tips of Chester’s mohawk. “Oh,” he said, as he pointed, “that’s Chester from the club the other night.” 

Mark’s gray eyes bounced from Kevin’s quizzical look to Chester. “Yes,” he answered honestly. “I wasn’t expecting to see him here tonight.” 

Kevin shoved a hand through his tightly cropped black hair. “Will it be awkward if he sees us here together? He did kind of came on to me, you know.” His cheeks blushed a little as he ducked his eyes. “I wasn’t going to tell you, but since we’re all here together. I think maybe he was just drunk because after we danced, he. . .he just walked away. Then you asked me for my number and, I, well. . .” 

Mark turned his full attention to his date, reaching for the young man’s hand. “Kev,” he said sweetly, “don’t worry about it. Chester’s a bit loose, if you know what I mean. That’s nothing personal against you. You give him a few drinks and he’s quick to jump into bed or a backseat with anyone. He’s a good guy deep down,” he added, throwing something sympathetic into his voice, “but. . .how’s that saying go? A tiger can’t change his stripes. That’s Chester. He’s a tiger. I work with him, actually,” he decided to toss in, just in case he needed the truth to play a part in his plan. “But that’s business, and I want to keep tonight about us. I can always tell you about Chester and work later, if you want.”

Kevin nodded, deciding that he was lucky he’d ended up on a date with Mark, and not the one that had flirted and danced with him, just to walk away the moment the music had stopped. “I’d like to hear about your work later,” he offered before he went back to scanning the menu. 

“I’ll tell you all about it,” Mark mumbled, his glare firmly pointed at Jason as he watched his husband lean over and kiss Ryan right on the lips. 

“You’re so adorable,” Jason gushed, landing another kiss on Ryan as he made a fuss over the fried squid and his depleted supply of ketchup. As he pulled back, he licked his lips, the taste of ketchup overriding the delicate lemon-basil sauce that had come with the calamari. “I think you could at least _try_ my sauce. Just a taste,” he pleaded with an overdone pout as he dipped his fork with a small piece of calamari in the white sauce. “For me?” He held his fork out, waiting for Ryan to take the bite. 

“Now you know I can’t resist that,” Ryan said before he took the bite right off the fork. It was a foreign taste to him, and his face skewed a little, but he swallowed it quickly, slapping his tongue around inside his mouth to try and cope with the flavors he wasn’t used to. “It’s okay,” he said, tilting his head toward his boyfriend. “It’s different. Maybe if I had it more often, I’d get used to it.” 

Jason felt the smile dim a little on his face as he thought about the future, and whether or not they’d be able to do anything like this again soon. “Thanks for trying it,” he said softly, rescued from saying more by the appearance of their waiter with the main course. He caught Mike giving his bacon crusted scallops more than one glance as the plates were sat down, and their appetizer plates whisked away. Once their food was in place, and Jason had sent the poor waiter back to the kitchen for more ketchup for Ryan’s steak and shrimp, he couldn’t help but ask Mike, “are you regretting your dinner decision?”

Before Mike could answer, Chester popped in with, “I can’t believe you didn’t order bacon raviolis.” He smirked at his lover playfully. “I bet they’d bring you some bacon bits, if you ask. You could put them all over the top.” He pointed at Mike’s large helping of lobster ravioli with his fork. 

Mike shot Chester a scandalized look. “Bacon bits? Like for a salad? You can’t put bacon bits on a cream sauce like this.” He looked down at the delicate hand-rolled pasta filled with lobster and then over at Jason’s scallops again. “Though if they put the bacon _in_ with the lobster, that might be good.” 

“Done,” Chester quickly announced as he snuggled up to Mike’s shoulder and kissed it quickly. “When we make these at home, we’ll stuff them with the lobster and your favorite pieces of bacon.” 

“Oh my god, that sounds amazing,” Mike agreed, turning to Chester. “We should make these when we get home.” He was already thinking about how good it would taste as they both went to work on their matching dinners. The waiter came by with Ryan’s ketchup - again, not in a bottle - and disappeared after Jason assured him everything was now perfect. Mike took a few bites and lifted his eyes to glance around the table. It wasn’t the way he’d planned the evening, but so far it was relatively light-hearted and he was having a good time away from the rest of the YRS crew.

He bumped his knee against Chester’s under the table, and smiled when their eyes met. The concerned look from earlier was gone, and it made Mike’s heart feel ten times lighter to see his boyfriend looking relaxed. “What do you think? Good choice?” he asked, pointing his fork at his ravioli and looking down at his plate before he looked over at Chester’s matching entree. 

Chester nodded, his mouth full of lobster. He swallowed it down and took a drink before he said. “It’s really good. Better than I figured. You win on this one. We’re definitely making these at home.” He speared another piece of stuffed pasta with his fork and popped it into his mouth, licking is lips. “And,” he added after his bite was gone, “I don’t even have to put ketchup on it.” He knew the subject was getting old, but he had to throw in just that last comment, flashing Mike his best cheeky smile along with it. 

****

Mike stood at the railing of the ferry boat, with Chester at his side, looking over the water. The gentle ripples on the surface were tipped silver in the moonlight, and even though there were people all around the deck of the boat, it felt quiet outside. He was comfortably full after dinner, which of course included dessert afterwards, and he was enjoying the alone time he was sharing with Chester now that they were out of the restaurant. 

_I have no idea where Jason and Ryan have gotten off to,_ he thought, scanning the people around them quickly before deciding that he didn’t care very much. Even though he had been the one to offer for his boss and boyfriend to join them, he was happy that one part of the evening seemed to be the romantic alone time he’d planned. _It was pretty cute to watch them bicker over dessert and feed each other bites of cheesecake._ In his head, Mike was able to grudgingly admit that having Ryan and Jason along was a nice thing to do, even if it wasn’t how he’d originally envisioned the evening. He knew the two of them rarely stole time alone that wasn’t rushed and tense, though tonight counted the second time on just this trip that they’d managed more than a quick liaison in a hidden away room.

Putting thoughts of their companions away from his mind, Mike leaned his head toward Chester, wrapping one arm around his waist and tucking him close to his side. The breeze was tickling his face as he held their bodies together and felt Chester relax into him. It was nice to not be dealing with the stress of being at work.

“I know some of that seafood wasn’t your thing,” he started, his voice low and his lips close to Chester’s ear, “but I hope you enjoyed the restaurant. You really looked amazing in the candlelight. I wanted to eat you for dessert.”

Chester smiled through the evening darkness, the hanging lights of the overhead deck to their backs. “It was okay,” he said, turning his head just a little to get his mouth closer to Mike’s face. “The best part is just being out together. And this is different.” He laced an arm around Mike’s back to return the embrace as he pointed out to the water with his other hand. “I wouldn’t want to ride one of these every day, but it’s neat to do it once.” 

“Yeah, being dependent on this boat to get from point A to point B would be weird. It would drive me nuts if it were late. I hate waiting.” Mike moved his free hand through the air dismissively. “And sorry it was just okay. Next time you can look up places to go.” He twisted a little, bringing his hips a little closer to Chester’s. “I mean it about dessert. I can’t wait to get back. I _might_ have brought a little treat along in my suitcase. You know, if you’re up for it.” Mike dropped his hand and slid it into the back pocket of Chester’s jeans, giving his ass a little squeeze as he nuzzled a kiss to his boyfriend’s jawline.

“Mmmm,” Chester purred, his hand sliding up and down Mike’s opposite side. “A surprise? Do tell,” he begged lightly as he returned the soft kiss, putting his wet lips on Mike’s neck and then up just under his earlobe. “And you know I’m pretty much always up for anything.” 

Mike leaned back a little and touched Chester’s neck, then drew a half circle around the top of his collar with his finger. “It’s something I like to put on you, very much,” he husked, looking at Chester’s lip ring and imagining the spiked collar around his neck, hoping that Chester knew exactly what he was talking about.

Chester’s eyes popped open a little wider. “Oh,” he whispered. “Did you really?” It wasn’t really a question as he turned more into his lover, letting their lower halves touch in more places. “You _are_ sneaky.” He leaned his head back in close, petting kisses from Mike’s ear, back down his neck and then up under his chin - each one short, but succulent as he pulled on Mike’s tender skin a little. “I’m so glad our room has a lock on it,” he mumbled from the back of his mind as his thoughts were already away from the boat and preparing for what would be next. 

A few feet down the railing, Ryan had his arm around Jason’s waist as they both looked out at the water. It was something akin to magical to him as he watched the waves, and as often as he liked, he turned to release some sort of affection on his boyfriend. A kiss to his cheek, a nudge to his side, a pat on his ass. It was all out in front of everyone, and the freeing feeling of that was intoxicating. “Too bad we don’t have these in L.A.,” Ryan said, keeping his voice between them as other passengers milled around behind them. 

“We’d be finding excuses to escape all the time,” Jason said back, a smile touching his lips. This was exactly what he’d been hoping for the moment he found out Mark would be out for the evening. All he’d wanted was time to be with Ryan and not have to hide. “Ry?” he asked in a far-away tone, “where do you want to live? When we leave? Where do you want to go?” Before Ryan could answer him, Jason laughed softly. “I feel like a kid asking what you want to be when you grow up. Dreaming. Wishing.” He squeezed his fingers on Ryan’s hip and waited to see what he came up with for their future.

Ryan looked down at the railing of the ferry boat, his free hand going out to steady himself for a second as he felt the waves under their feet. The concept of Jason’s question wasn’t foreign. He’d thought about it before, debating over where they would go once a divorce happened. One thought that he’d toyed with more than once was the posh loft by the ocean. _But that’s where Chaz and Mike live and I would never want to take that from them. Of course after everything goes down, who knows how it will turn out._ He let out a short shiver before he said, “I like L.A., but I know things will probably be messy once you split from _him_ , so I’m up for going somewhere else. Maybe a suburb or, I don’t know,” he stated honestly, pulling Jason a little closer. “As long as we’re together, that’s all that matters. It will be easier to stay close to things and people we know, though. I would think. You know, for support.” 

Jason nodded. “You’re probably right. I always think about just disappearing. Saying I’m leaving and just getting in the car with a bag and you and never looking back.” He felt his cheeks flush a little and he looked down at the water. “I know that’s not realistic. But I was listening to Mike and Chaz talk about the future at dinner, and I was thinking about us… and just wondering where we’d end up. Wondering if we’d get a little apartment in LA or move somewhere low key.” He let out a sigh and then turned to Ryan. “But we can talk about that later. I was just dreaming. You make me want to dream. You make me think about the future again, and what I want out of it, and how good it could be. You make me feel like it’s all something that I want and not something I’m going to have to endure. And I can’t wait to be free with you.” Jason couldn’t see much of Ryan’s face in the moonlight and dim ferry lights, but he could tell that his words had made an impact. 

Ryan let out a shiver. “Jay,” he whispered, “I love you.” He knew it wasn’t much, but he wasn’t used to being told that he was so important to someone. He turned, and cupped his boyfriend’s cheek in his hand before he leaned in, closing his eyes. He brought their lips together slowly, savoring the moment forever in his heart and mind - the time they kissed on the ferry. 

When they pulled apart, Ryan drifted his fingers up to push a strand of Jason’s dark hair back toward his ear. “You can move in with me,” he offered off the top of his head. “Maybe my roommate would move out or we could drive him crazy with all our wild, loud sex until he moves out pissed as hell.” He chuckled a little before he thought about it a moment more. “Or maybe somewhere _lowkey_ would be nice. Someplace where we can be invisible for a while. Invisible together.” 

“We’ll figure it out,” Jason assured him, running his fingers down the front of Ryan’s dark button-down shirt. He let his fingers linger, feeling over Ryan’s chest as he leaned close for another kiss. It felt like he was melting every time their lips met. They could kiss for hours, here on the deck of the ferry with the wind in his hair and Ryan’s body heat close and familiar, keeping away any hint of chill. He knew the night would end soon, and he wasn’t ready.

On the other side of the deck, Mark was ducking and moving as he carefully edged his way through the crowd. He’d long since sent his date home in a cab. It was easier to keep tabs on Jason without having Kevin tagging along asking questions and forcing Mark to come up with believable variations of the truth.

He moved a little to the left, dodging around an older couple, and now he could see his husband much clearer. There was still quite a few people and benches between him and the railing, but there was no mistaking what he was seeing. He watched with his fists balled tightly at his sides as Ryan touched Jason’s face. As the two of them leaned in and kissed, with the lazy moonlight as a backdrop. 

Mark could feel his pulse increasing as he moved just a little closer. He could tell they were talking in between each kiss that was exchanged, and he would have given a million dollars to be able to hear what they were saying. He narrowed his eyes, leaning forward a little in a vain attempt to make something out, but there were too many people around. _Damn him. Right out here in public, too. How could he be two-timing me with Ryan?_ He looked down at himself, a fleeting moment of self-doubt hitting him, as he checked out his well put together, sophisticated outfit. _Guess he’s going for the opposite of me. Heh._ He grit his teeth as he kept watching, unable to look away. With every kiss he saw, every tender caress between his husband and his employee, Mark’s insides twisted a little more between pure anger and sadness. _I never thought Jason would do something like this. How long has this been going on? I need to know._

The idea of marching across the deck and yanking Jason away from Ryan’s arms was a powerful one, but Mark took a deep breath to rethink that a little more. _I can’t make a scene. I don’t want the cops involved in anything. And Mike and Chaz are still here, too. That bastard._ The curse spit through his mind as he glared at Ryan’s back. _No way Jason went after him. He must have seduced Jason into this. He must have. He’s slick when it comes to that. I’ve seen him do it on camera. He can even get Chaz to melt when he’s trying. That’s it. He’s got Jason wrapped up in his sweet talk or. . .promises of. . .Ryan doesn’t even have anything. What could he possibly be promising him? What can he give Jason that I’m not already doing?_

The question stumped him, and in that same thought he decided that he didn’t have enough information yet. He had no idea how this had all started, or even when it had started. Was his husband having an affair under his own roof? _And who else knows about this? Obviously Mike and Chaz know. . .the marshmallow._ It was like a light dawned in Mark’s mind as he pulled together a scenario of, while he was out working trying to find new talent for their business, Jason was being fed marshmallows by Ryan. _And doing God knows what else in my bed._ The idea seethed from his brain and his lips curled into a growl. _Not here. Not now. This is someone’s fault. And I need to know whose. I’ll wait. I’ll watch. Maybe I’ll ask around, see how much the others know. I’ve asked Amir before, he knows nothing. And Chaz. I can’t believe he knows about this and he hasn’t told me. He’s supposed to be loyal to me. Always. He’s going to get an ear full next time I get him alone. Or maybe not even alone._ He crossed his arms. _That shit he was telling me at the club about Ryan having a boyfriend. Jadon._

Mark jerked, like the revelation literally smacked him in the face. “That sneaky little fuck,” he hissed out loud. He twisted for a second, trying to catch a glimpse of Mike and Chester, but they were too far down the deck for him to see anything. _He lied to me even about that. And that was right to my face. He’s gotten so out of control lately. And Amir went along with it, which means. . ._

The thought faded as Mark cupped the back of his neck while he watched Jason be the aggressor this time, pulling Ryan close and kissing him all over his neck. It was almost too much to take, but Mark couldn’t look away. He had to know. He had to find out how he’d managed to lose his own husband right out from under him. 

**** 

Mike was first into the bedroom when they arrived back at the house. He hadn’t lingered saying his good nights to Ryan and Jason, pulling Chester along with him to their room. All of the touching and kissing on the deck of the ferry had made him even more impatient than usual after he’d hinted not so subtly to Chester that he’d brought along their favorite accessory to Seattle. He heard the sound of the lock engaging behind him and wasted no time dropping to his knees next to his suitcase, unzipping the compartment where the black collar with the silver spikes was carefully hidden away. 

“Yesss, here we go,” Mike cheered as he got his hand on the collar and pulled it out of the suitcase. He turned back toward Chester, who had already tossed his shirt into the corner and was standing next to the bed, waiting for him with an inviting shine to his dark eyes. Mike held up the collar and smiled. “I’ve been thinking about this since dinner. I can’t wait to pull on this tonight.” 

“You and me both,” Chester said before he danced around in a half circle, leaving his back facing his boyfriend. “I’m ready. Slap it on me.” He wiggled his ass, which he knew looked amazing in the jeans he had on. 

“God, you’re so fucking hot,” Mike said, lightly smacking Chester’s ass as he stepped up behind him, putting the collar around his neck and buckling it with just enough space for his fingers to curl underneath. He could feel the instant rush of blood to his dick as soon as the accessory was in place, and he reached down to adjust himself through his jeans before he yanked Chester backwards by his hips. “I don’t know what’s wrong with me, but I want you so bad, Ches. And you’re going to have to keep it down or everyone upstairs will know what we’re doing.” He pressed Chester’s ass against his erection and sighed raggedly. “ _Fuck_.” 

Chester was already popping the button on his jeans. His cock was hard and needed to come out, and the more Mike talked, the harder it got. “I don’t know, Sexy Boy,” he said, his voice strained as he shoved a hand down the front of his open jeans to try and get some relief. “You know how to get me going. You bring out my rockstar lungs.” 

Mike couldn’t help but bite lightly at the shoulder in front of him as his hand left Chester’s hip and pushed the hand inside Chester’s jeans away. “Well, then, I guess you might have to put your face in a pillow or something.” He slid his hand down the waistband of Chester’s underwear and somehow got his fingers around his dick in the tight space. “Mmm, babe, you’re just as bad as I am. You’ve been thinking about this, too. We’re so crazy sometimes.” He was gratified that they were back in an emotional space where they were both desiring each other equally again. There had been a little rough patch a few weeks ago but that was all but forgotten now. He nipped a few more bites across Chester’s skin as he let his hand stroke up and down his lover’s shaft. He had a feeling there wasn’t going to be much foreplay tonight.

Chester’s head leaned back, his cheek touching Mike’s jawline. “Let me take them off,” he panted as he reached a hand up over his shoulder to grab at Mike’s hair, face, ear - whatever he could touch. “You’re making me wet.” He could feel his pre-cum leaking, slicking Mike’s hand and leaving a damp place on the front of his underwear. It was all fantastic, but clothes were now a hinderance. 

Mike didn’t wait. Chester whimpered as he pulled his hand back, going to push down the jeans and underwear he was still wearing all at once. “Step out,” he instructed, and smirked as Chester bent over to steady himself on the edge of the bed as he lifted each foot for Mike to help him with his clothes. “What a view,” he teased, kissing each of Chester’s ass cheeks that were right in front of his face. 

Chester grinned as he felt Mike’s warm lips on his ass. “I like that,” he said with a laugh. “You kissing my ass. Ass kisser,” he snickered as he twisted to see the grin on his boyfriend’s face. “Is it my turn now?” He spun completely around, his hands going right to Mike’s flannel as he started to undo the buttons in lightning speed. He’d undone so many of Mike’s flannel shirts in hormone driven rushes that he was practically a pro at it. 

He pulled the checkered shirt off and down Mike’s arms with both hands, and tossed it away. “One more layer to go,” he said, stopping for a moment to run his finger down the middle of Mike’s black t-shirt. 

“You know you love my layers,” Mike answered, letting himself be undressed and refraining from grabbing Chester and tossing him on the bed. He wasn’t sure at what point his romantic notions of the evening had turned in to total lust, but he figured it might have had something to do with Jason and Ryan being in the way. It was his impatience coming to the surface and making itself known. If he didn’t have Chester soon he felt like he would lose his mind.

“More layers means more work,” Chester said with an impish grin as he tossed Mike’s t-shirt away and grabbed him by his belt loops. He looked down, watching himself unbuckle the silver latch before pulling the entire belt free. He still had it in his hand as he looked up and pressed his lips to Mike’s goatee, and then around his jawline. “But it is fun to undress you.” 

“I think you enjoy seeing how long it can take you,” Mike complained, running both hands down Chester’s arms and tugging on his wrists. “As soon as these jeans are off, I want you holding onto that headboard. How does that sound?” He helped Chester with his jeans and shifted his hips a little as both his underwear and pants were pulled down and off. As soon as they were naked together Mike hauled Chester up from the floor and smashed their lips together. He wasn’t waiting for an answer as he stepped toward the bed, backing Chester there with him.

“I love it when you’re feisty,” Chester said with a breathy pant between rushed kisses. He had his hands on Mike’s shoulders, and then down his arms, feeling his toned biceps as they backed up another step, and then he felt the bed behind him. He let himself be pushed, as he fell back on the mattress, but he was quick to do as Mike had suggested. He flipped himself over and crawled to the top, placing both hands on the cherrywood finish of the decadent headboard. He glanced over his shoulder. “You coming?” 

Mike didn’t even answer. Somehow he’d managed to get the bottle of lube in his hand while they undressed, and he was on the bed and between Chester’s spread knees as soon as he was beckoned. He flicked his thumb over the top of the lid and opened it with ease, pouring a healthy amount into his hand to slick up his cock and his fingers. The anticipation was killing him as he tossed the bottle aside and wrapped his arm around Chester’s waist, leaving kisses along his neck atop the collar. He was hit with a sudden impulse to grab at the collar with his teeth, and he pulled back on it, delighting in the gasp he heard from his lover. “Mmm, Ches, you’re so _fucking_ hot like this. You ready to feel me? Because I’m ready for you.” His cock nudged against the back of Chester’s left thigh as he dropped his lubed hand down, searching for the tight opening he needed to stretch.

“I’m ready,” Chester said, his breathing already labored as he waited. He could feel Mike’s dick poking his leg, which was more of a turn on than he could comprehend. He could already feel his boyfriend leaking, leaving a damp spot on his bare thigh every time their skin touched. Chester’s eyes shut as he felt Mike’s cold, slicked fingers prodding at his sensitive opening, and he gripped onto the headboard a little more, making sure to not tense the lower part of his body. “Fuck, Sexy Boy,” he mumbled, “I want it.” 

It took all of Mike’s willpower not to carelessly plow ahead the way he’d done that one awful time back in Palm Springs. He fought to control himself, make himself take the time to properly prepare Chester for him, when all he wanted to do was grab him by the hips and bury himself in the blissful heat. He waited until he could hear the need in Chester’s whines, until he’d fingered him as long as he could stand it, before he pulled his hand away and grabbed his own cock. “Scoot toward me a little bit, Ches, and lean over for me,” he said, pulling on one of Chester’s hips in encouragement. When his boyfriend complied, and the head of Mike’s dick could feel its target, he pushed inside, squeezing his eyes shut as he worked his way little by little into his lover. “God… fuck, babe, I fucking love you,” he gasped as his hips hit the back of Chester’s ass and he held still for a moment, savoring their connection. 

Chester’s head and forearms were on the bed, his hands clawed into the top blanket. His eyes were shut as he felt his entire bottom become full. His mouth dropped open as he breathed, his body clenching tight. He knew the transition from feeling awkward and a little painful to absolute heaven, would be short. Any second all the good feelings would start blitzing through him, starting somewhere deep in his abdomen and culminating in his cock and balls. His lover’s weight pressed behind him, and as movement started, so did the sensations as his insides were rubbed and lubricated into full stimulation he wasn’t in control of. 

Mike had one hand on Chester’s hip, holding him in place as he settled into a good rhythm. When he opened his eyes and the first thing he saw was the black collar, he felt a spike of adrenaline through his body. With his free hand he reached for it, latching on from behind and giving it a quick tug as he leaned forward to nip a few kisses down the side of Chester’s neck. “You’re so sexy, you know that?” he whispered, his breath hot against Chester’s skin. He didn’t let up on his deep thrusts as he covered all the skin he could reach in wet kisses and licks, and occasional bites. He left his hand on the collar as the one on Chester’s hip snaked around to his dick and started stroking in time with the thrusts he was giving from behind. With every movement of his hand, he pulled more precum down his boyfriend’s shaft, slicking his palm and easing the pumps he was using to bring Chester closer to the edge. It wasn’t going to take much more to have them both crying out each other’s names in ecstacy. 

“Tell me what you want,” Mike growled as he tugged on the collar again. “Tell me, Chester, what you want me to do to you.” 

Between the tugs on the collar, Mike’s cock that felt like a powerdriver, and his hand that wouldn’t stop groping him from underneath, Chester wasn’t sure if he could come up with an answer. Everything felt like it was being electrified. Each tug on the collar brought his head up off the bed, stretching his neck and sending a special jolt of pleasure through his core, and his dick was quick to spit out extra pre-cum because of it. Mike’s deep thrusts were leaving him falling into the numb sub space, where the stretching and pounding of his inner walls was actually curling his toes and tightening his balls in tight chords. It was almost sensory overload as Chester’s head hit the mattress, Mike’s pull on the collar letting up for a moment. “More,” he gasped. “Pull me,” he said, with his eyes wide open, his entire body on the edge of diving into the bliss of his orgasm, which was just waiting for one more tipping point. “Fuck, Mike,” he said with a rough voice. “You’re so fucking big.” 

For just a split second, Mike hesitated, even though he wanted to pull tighter on the collar. In that moment he worried he might pull too hard, but then Chester’s voice, urging him on, cast aside the doubt and he gripped his hand around the leather and pulled back, shoving his dick forward with as much strength as he had in his legs as he hissed, “come for me, Ches. Come _hard,_ baby.” He grit his teeth as he made it his mission to get the most powerful climax from Chester’s body as he could. 

Mike’s pull on the collar brought Chester’s entire front half up off the mattress. The leather pressed tight to his neck, and his eyes were left popped open as he looked at the wall just above the headboard. Mike’s dick went deeper as Chester’s body bent into a backwards C shape, creating a collision between his prostate and Mike’s cock. It was like a hatch was opened, a button smashed by a fist. 

Chester’s restricted airway resulted in a gasp as he called Mike’s name, his internal barricades that had been keeping his orgasm at bay, broken to bits as his semen rushed forward, shooting from his scrotum and out through his dick. He felt it leave his body in a gush, the release being its own kind of uncontrollable rush. 

“Yes, yes, Ches,” Mike called as he stroked Chester through his orgasm, letting up the pressure on the collar and making sure his boyfriend could breathe. He bit down on his lip as he continued to thrust, moaning at the pleasure he felt when Chester’s body squeezed around him so tightly. “Fuck, yes.” 

It all seemed to last longer than usual before Mike felt Chester’s boneless slump toward the mattress, his body thoroughly spent. Mike followed him down, their bodies bent together as he moved both hands to Chester’s hips and pulled him up tight and close as he neared his own orgasm. He didn’t bother to hold back his own voice, calling his lover’s name over and over as he felt his balls tighten and then release his cum deep inside Chester’s body. He pushed through his orgasm, panting hard. Each thrust felt deeper than the last until he was finished, his hips slowing to something more lazy, riding out the aftershocks. 

Mike dragged his lips across Chester’s shoulder and then buried his face next to the collar, nudging it with his nose. “I fucking love this thing,” he sighed, his heart racing still.

Chester’s eyes had long since closed. He could feel his lover’s hot breath on his neck, and he had zero doubts about what was being said. “Me too,” he whispered, his body still coming down from his own orgasm and the added rush of Mike’s on top of that. He’d felt his boyfriend come inside of him and even though he knew what was next, in those few blissful moments he was in paradise. His body was hot and sweaty and stuck to Mike’s like glue. His bottom - his body - was full and felt complete, and his balls were empty, drained of their juice, which was now all over the bed underneath him. 

“I don’t want to move,” Mike whined, his entire body feeling heavy. He was totally sated and he could feel sleep chasing him even though he was still connected to Chester. For another minute he held still until he couldn’t bear his weight on his forearms any longer. “Okay, babe, easy now.” He pulled out slowly, far more carefully than anything else he had done all night long, then pressed a damp kiss to Chester’s cheek as he dropped heavily next to him on the mattress. “I bet I sleep good tonight,” he mumbled with a half smile. His eyes were already closed and he could feel his mind slipping away before he remembered. “Ches. Turn your back to me. I gotta take your collar off.”

Chester picked his head up in a jerk, like he’d just been yanked from sleep. He saw Mike’s hand reaching, and he rolled over slowly, facing his back to his boyfriend. “I need to get dressed,” he mumbled. “I gotta piss and we’re not at home. . .no naked bathroom trips.” 

“Ughhhh,” Mike groaned, fumbling with the buckle on the collar until he got it free. He dropped it on the floor next to the bed like it was a fifty pound weight. “I’m not getting up,” he decided. “Just throw my clothes at me when you go to the bathroom,” he begged. 

Chester slowly sat himself up, one hand going to his neck where he rubbed at the tender place the collar had left. His other he braced on the bed as he swung his legs off the edge. He waited a second, refocusing and figuring out where his pajama bottoms were. _Fuck. They’re in the dresser._ He let out a soft groan as he stood up, his bottom stabbing him for a second in pain, something he knew would be gone on its own. Anal sex wasn’t without its consequences. 

He stumbled over to the dresser and opened up the top drawer. He pulled out a pair of plain gray pajama bottoms for himself and Mike’s black ones. He spun around, ready to carelessly throw them at Mike’s head so he could see him flail around like a fish out of water at the sudden disturbance, but he decided against it. His boyfriend was on top of the blankets, naked as the day he was born, and Chester took a moment to appreciate the sight of one worn out Mike Shinoda. 

He smiled to himself as he headed back across the room. He retrieved his underwear and pulled them on, and after finding Mike’s he took both over and laid them neatly on the nightstand next to him. 

Chester headed back to the dresser and quickly pulled out a shirt to throw on so he could escape down the hallway. He heard a groan from behind him, and the rustling of sheets. He looked over his shoulder at the bed, his eyes soaking in the soft vision of Mike curled up in the blankets, his head on the pillow and his eyes closed. “I’m just going to the bathroom. I’ll be right back,” he reminded his boyfriend. He barely caught the mumble from Mike’s lips. _That’s right, Sexy Boy. My hot ass wore you out. He’s become such a beast in bed._

Chester’s lips pulled to a satisfied smile as he thought about how much his boyfriend had changed when it came to their bedroom activities. It was hard to believe that Mike Shinoda was once the timid virgin who was shy about everything. Now he was a dominant lover who would throw Chester to the bed and ravage him completely without a hint of bashfulness as long as they were both into it. Mike had learned exactly how to make his boyfriend moan and scream and orgasm so hard that tears would sting the corner of Chester’s eyes sometimes. It had almost become commonplace for Mike’s daily sex drive to outmatch Chester’s, a difference that Chester was keeping track of, silently in the back of his mind. 

He gave Mike a last onceover before he flipped the light off and headed down the hallway. He yawned as he scratched his side, his fingernails digging into the flimsy material of his white tank top he’d put on for bed. Normally he’d be sleeping naked, but since they were in a strange place, and he had no idea how anything would go minute to minute, he and Mike both had been wearing pajama bottoms and shirts to sleep in every night. 

Chester flipped on the light of the hallway bathroom before he stepped in and closed the door. He quickly took care of business, and then headed to the double vanity to wash his hands. He’d already showered before they’d gone out to the seafood restaurant and ferry ride, and now he looked tore up. 

He stared at himself in the mirror - at his mohawk that was uneven parts flattened and still partly styled. At the ring in his lip and the tired look in his brown eyes. There were lines forming around his mouth, and his cheekbones were more prominent than he liked. His casual once over quickly turned to a glare as he studied his face and the mix of young man and older-beyond-his-years, which seemed to melt into something unattractive. 

Chester knew it wasn’t true, but he tugged on the front of his tank top, feeling uncomfortable in his clothes as he thought. _Can people tell? Can they tell by looking at me that I’m. . .damaged? Used? I bet they can. I’m practically the fucking poster boy for disposable._

He poked a finger at one of the strands of his mohawk that was still standing. _They were looking at me. . .those people at the restaurant. Like I didn’t belong there. Like I wasn’t worth it. They’re right._ His gaze dropped to the sink as his hands braced onto the white granite edge of the vanity. _Mike deserves better. He knew all about the fancy food and what everything tasted like. If he ever makes up with his parents, they won’t like me. Not like this. They’ll look at me like those people did tonight. They’ll look at me like his other friends do. . .Anna and Dave. Like I’m not good enough for him. Like I’m just a place filler till he finds someone else. Someone suitable._

He slowly lifted his chin, his eyes going into a dead stare at the red-tips he’d loved for the last two years, but hate was boiling quickly in his stomach as he snarled. He opened up the drawers of the vanity, his mind zeroed in on only one task. He rummaged through cotton balls and nail clippers and extra bars of soap and toilet paper rolls before he finally spotted what he wanted. 

He held the pair of scissors up, inspecting their sharp blades before he went to work. The first cut was slow, snipping off just a little bit. He held the the sliver of red hair between his fingers, eyeing it like it had betrayed him. Chester’s heart was pumping as he made the decision of no return. He let the hair drop to the sink before he cut another piece and then another, each one larger than the last. 

In just a few minutes, he’d chopped his mohawk clear down, leaving only about a half inch of dark hair left in its place. He dropped the scissors as he looked at himself fully in the mirror, the ghost of his red-tips leaving him almost not recognizing himself for a second. His mouth was open as he breathed and then he was on the search again. He opened the rest of the vanity drawers, swearing loudly when he didn’t find what he wanted. 

“Fucking come on,” he growled as he opened the tall cabinets by the door. They were stacked with towels and washcloths, and one had a full arsenal of cleaning supplies. Chester slammed the last one shut, his hand going over his now itchy scalp as he felt the too tall line of hair that needed to get shaved to match the rest of his head. He thought about going around to his co-workers to see if any of them had brought shavers with them, but he didn’t want to leave the bathroom this way. 

He rubbed his forehead before he walked over to the toilet and grabbed the little trash can that was sitting close to it. He scooped his bits of hair out of the sink and tossed them away, just as it dawned on him. He looked back at the toilet, and the two door cabinet above it. He pulled on his lip ring with his teeth as he walked over and opened them up, and his eyes doubled in size. “Score,” he whispered as he pulled the black and silver electric razor down and inspected it. It even had a little bag of clip-on guards with it, and Chester made quick work of finding the smallest one. 

He plugged the shaver in, leaned over the sink and zipped it down the center of his head, the remaining evidence of his mohawk vanishing. He made a few passes, scrubbing the loose hairs free from his head before he was satisfied. He washed his newly shaved head off in the sink, rinsing away all the stray, itchy hairs. He carefully cleaned the shavers next, and with the help of the products in the one cabinet, he had the sink looking back to pristine condition in no time. He returned the shavers to their hidden spot and looked back in the mirror. 

His eyes returned to a standoff with himself as he ran a hand over the super short dark hairs that covered his whole head. _I won’t stand out now. Maybe that’s best. No one will see me, and that’s safer. Mike might hate it._ The sudden thought of his boyfriend jerked his head toward the closed bathroom door. Every thought of how his lover might react tumbled through Chester’s mind and he felt a pinch to his heart before he shook it off. What was done was done, and he couldn’t take it back. He let out a sigh and opened the door. He turned the bathroom light off with a click and headed back down the hallway, hoping no one would see him. He wasn’t in the mood to answer questions. Not tonight. Maybe not ever.

He quietly opened the bedroom door, and leaving the light off, he crept to the bed. He could hear the light snores coming from Mike, and Chester let out a sigh of relief. He pulled back the blankets and slid in to snuggle up with his lover. He pressed himself to Mike’s warm back, and placed a kiss to his neck before he let his eyes close, hoping his mind would shut off so he could sleep. 

****  
TBC


	43. Seattle Part Six: Something Stolen

The dreary rain that had drizzled down non-stop since Mike and Chester’s arrival in Seattle had given way to a harder sprinkle. At some point in the night after their candlelight dinner and ferry ride double date, and some time after Mike fell asleep in post-orgasmic bliss, a storm rolled in, sticking Chester close to his side. He remembered putting his arms around his lover and pulling him close, murmuring reassurances between thunderclaps, before Chester managed to fall asleep. Now, in the back of Mike’s consciousness, he could hear the drops hitting the roof and the window, but it didn’t bother him. He found the sound comforting, snuggled naked under the blankets in the upstairs bedroom. It was unusual for him to fall asleep naked, but last night had worn him out. 

Mike curled on his side, pulling Chester in closer to his chest. His body was tired. While last night had been fun, he was feeling the aftermath of his sexual escapades this morning, and wanted nothing more than to stay hidden away in bed with his boyfriend. Everything was warm and soft around him, the light through the windows gray, and the rain drowned out most of the sounds of the others in the house. It was like being alone. 

He nuzzled his face into the spot between Chester’s shoulder and the pillow, breathing in Chester’s natural scent deeply. _I hate that we have to get up and work today. I hope it stops raining. I don’t think we can handle any more shoots in the rain… I don’t remember Jason saying anything about us being outside. God, I hope not._ He squeezed his eyes closed tighter, ghosting his lips over the back of Chester’s neck. _He must not have slept well last night. He’s not even moving._

Mike lay still, thinking, for a few more minutes as the muffled sounds of the others in the house waking up started filtering through the locked door. Their private time together was coming to an end. Breakfast would be ready soon, and he didn’t want to have to go straight from bed to the chaos of everyone together at the table. He spread his fingers over the shirt covering Chester’s stomach and flexed them against the muscles there, a smile crossing his face as he lifted his head to leave a soft kiss behind his boyfriend’s ear.

“Ches… morning…” he whispered gently, slowly opening his eyes in the muted morning light. 

He felt a moment of disorientation as his gaze landed on Chester’s hair, all shaved down to the same length the sides had been just hours before. It was a sight he was completely unprepared for, and it knocked his thoughts a little off balance as he shifted up on his elbow to get a better look. Without thinking he pulled his hand from Chester’s stomach and lifted it to his head, timidly touching the short, dark hair in the center where the beloved mohawk used to be. _What in the hell happened? When did he do this? And why?_

Mike carefully dragged his fingers over Chester’s scalp, feeling the close cropped hair that felt like velvet. An uneasy feeling settled into the pit of his stomach as he memorized the shape of Chester’s head and the new feeling of his hair under his fingertips. It just didn’t seem real. There was no way shaving his hair had been a rational decision, but Mike couldn’t think of anything that would have lead to such a drastic move. _We had a great night. Dinner was good and the ferry ride was romantic, and then we came back and… what happened? We were a little crazy last night, but I love his hair. Loved. His hair. His red tipped hair I could run my fingers through at home in our bed. Home. We need to go home. Being here is messing with his head._ “Ches? Babe?” Mike took his hand away from Chester’s head and softly touched his shoulder. 

Chester’s mind picked up the sound of Mike’s voice, but he didn’t want to move. It had been a rough night, his sleep interrupted off and on from the thunder hitting overhead and his brain tumbling unwanted thoughts about everything from how work would go today to the trip back home and how things might be two years from now. “It’s early,” Chester managed to get out, his voice dry and scratchy as he nuzzled his head deeper into the pillow. 

“Yeah,” Mike whispered, running his hand down Chester’s arm. “I missed you,” he added, still staring at the place Chester’s hair had been when he’d fallen asleep. “I didn’t want to get up in time for breakfast, I wanted to have some time with you before we went downstairs.”

“Missed me?” Chester asked, his eyes creeping open to a blurry vision of his boyfriend before he blinked away the sleep. He let out a quick yawn as he said, “I’ve been here all night. And I think I’m still stuffed from dinner.” He offered a smile before closing his eyes again. “I vote we bail on breakfast. Just hang out up here and be slugs. Slugs in bed.” He paused before he opened his eyes. “Unless you’re hungry.” 

Mike was completely at a loss. Chester was acting as though nothing were different, as though what Mike were seeing was a mirage. “Um… you know me. I’m always hungry.” He bit his lip as he scanned his eyes over Chester’s face before lifting his hand back to the top of his head. Running his hand lightly over the top of his hair, Mike tried to smile. “Your head… it’s soft.” 

“Thanks,” Chester mumbled instinctively before his eyes widened and a small gasp escaped him. He instantly touched his head - his lack of hair - before he pulled back away from Mike’s touch. “Yeah, I. . .I cut it.” He ran his hand back and forth over his scalp before he sat up, his hands in his lap. “I hope you don’t hate it.” 

“I don’t hate it,” Mike said quickly. “I just… why? I fell asleep and you said you were going to the bathroom, and then I woke up to a new haircut. What happened?” He was hoping his tone wasn’t accusing. He was genuinely curious more than he was upset. It just didn’t make any sense. 

Chester looked over, his eyes flashing around Mike’s face and the concern that had set in. “I don’t know,” he answered before dropping his head and running his fingers over the short hairs again. It had been so long since he’d been able to feel that part of his skull. “Just thinking about stuff, and how things are. How I am. I didn’t plan to do it or anything, it just sort of happened.”

Mike sat up, scooting his back toward the headboard and leaning against his pillow. “What do you mean, how things are?” He crossed his arms over his bare chest and his eyes flicked to the window. It was still raining. “Ches… I mean, I don’t know what to say. You loved that mohawk.” 

Chester nodded, keeping his focus on his hands in front of him. “I did, but it was time to change it. And the people last night, the way they were looking at me. The way people _always_ look at me. . .I don’t want that anymore. I never wanted it. I just can’t ignore it anymore like I used to.” 

Mike reached out and touched Chester’s hair again, caressing the top of his head gently. “I don’t really know what you mean, Ches. But if you’re ready for a change, I guess this is about as different from a mohawk as you can get.” His thoughts rolled back to the first time he’d seen Chester, in Joe’s karate studio. It was true - he stood out - but Mike didn’t think that was a bad thing. In fact, it had been what caught his eyes first about his boyfriend. He absently rubbed Chester’s head while neither of them said anything. It was going to take some getting used to, and Mike hadn’t even looked at him straight on yet. 

Mike’s rubbing touch felt nice, and Chester leaned into it. “I know it’s drastic,” he admitted, “but I just want to be invisible for a little bit, and this as ordinary of a haircut as I could pull off.” He let out a sigh as his shoulders went back a little with his head, letting Mike’s hand gain as much access as it wanted. “And just think of the bathroom time I’ll save when we go out now.” 

“I guess you’re right,” Mike said slowly, thinking of all the times he’d teased Chester about his bathroom habits. “It feels nice like this. But I’ll miss your mohawk. This is the first time I’ve ever seen you without it. And… I feel silly having all this blue hair now. Maybe it’s time for me to change, too.”

Chester turned his head, catching Mike’s eyes. “Really?” He asked before he reached over to rub Mike’s knee through the blanket. “I like the blue, but I could see you growing it out maybe. You know, kinda shaggy.” He smiled as he took his hand from his lover’s knee to swipe a finger over Mike’s forehead. 

“Shaggy _and_ blue?” Mike asked, his face skewed in thought. “I don’t know… that might be too much.” He tried to conjure up a mental image of what Chester was talking about, but he just couldn’t picture it. “We’ll have to look at hairstyles online or something so you can show me what you’re thinking. I’ll try whatever you want, babe.” He slid his hand down the back of Chester’s neck, tickling the bottom of his hairline lightly and deciding that maybe there had been enough hair talk for the morning. “You feeling okay this morning?” With one finger he traced along the neckline of Chester’s shirt, where the collar had been last night.

Chester went back to rubbing Mike’s knee. “It’s your hair, you can do what you want, but I was thinking more silky black. You know, to match your gorgeous eyes,” he said, turning to smile Mike’s way. “And I’m fine. I’m hoping the rain stops,” he added with a groan, “but other than that, I’m good. Tired, but good. Mike, I,” he waited a second, passing his tongue over his lip piercing before he turned his whole body, so that he could really face his lover. “Last night was great,” he stated, because that was something he really wanted to make clear. “Not just being out and all the food, but sex last night was really topnotch. _All_ of it,” he insisted, squeezing his boyfriend’s knee. “I love what we do, please don’t think that it had anything to do with, with this.” He touched his head before he swallowed down everything else to give his boyfriend time to process it. 

Mike studied Chester’s eyes, looking for more clues about the why behind the drastic style change. The compliment about the evening and the sex felt strange to him, but he didn’t know what else to say about it all. There was something deep in Chester’s eyes, a shadow, that told him not to probe any further. “I want what you want,” he said simply. “If this is what you want, then I’m all in.” He leaned into Chester, sucking lightly on his bottom lip for a second before his hand snuck up the back of Chester’s shaved hair. They shared a brief, warm kiss before Mike let him go and smiled. “I’ll get used to it. And last night… last night _was_ pretty amazing.” 

“It was,” Chester agreed right away, his hand slinking up Mike’s leg over the blanket. “You bring it out of me, Sexy Boy.” He smiled before he leaned in to get another kiss, their lips joining in something soft that turned to something a little deeper as Chester let his tongue out. Despite the heavy state in which he’d gone to bed the night before, his mind felt clear this morning. He loved his boyfriend, and he loved the way they showed that to each other physically. It was no contest. Out of all the people in the world, Mike Shinoda was his favorite person to kiss. “We could go for round two,” Chester suggested the moment their kiss broke. “I’ve already got you naked, and I can ditch my clothes faster than anyone.” 

“Mmm, you know we have to work today,” Mike whined, making a dramatic sad face. “We probably shouldn’t push it, you know?” Despite his logic, Mike couldn’t help but lean back in for another kiss. His hands slid over Chester’s pajama top and then up under it, feeling over the warm skin his boyfriend was hiding. He was just seconds away from deciding that maybe they’d be okay for work later if he was on bottom this morning when there was an aggressive rattle of the doorknob, then a sharp knock on their bedroom door. Their lips popped apart as Mike backed away in surprise. 

Mark’s voice boomed through from out in the hallway. “Why the hell is this door locked?!” 

“Oh god,” Chester whimpered as he looked from Mike to the door and back again. “Fuck. He’s going to be pissed.” He waited a second, trying to wrangle his emotions that had just shot from loving and horny to worried and anxious in three seconds flat. “I’ll get it,” he said offhandedly to Mike, since he was well aware that his boyfriend was naked under the blankets. 

Chester stood up just as Mark pounded on the door again, demanding access. “Just a second!” Chester shouted back as he adjusted himself, pulling at his pajama pants and his shirt front. He ran his hand over his head and shivered before crossing the room and opening the door. He stepped back, allowing for their boss to enter. 

“These doors don’t need to be locked,” Mark barked the moment he stepped in, his attention flashing from Mike sitting on the bed with blankets pulled up around him to Chester. “And it’s breakfast. . .” he stopped, his gray eyes widening slightly. “What have you done?” he asked, as he took a step closer. “Where. . .where’s your hair?” he asked before he looked over at Mike, like maybe Chester’s mohawk was hiding under the blankets.

Mike twisted his hands into the blankets, his stomach turning sickeningly. “He cut it last night,” Mike answered for his boyfriend, trying to sound confident. “And we’ll be down for breakfast in a few minutes.” He looked over at Chester, who was tugging at his shirt hem. 

“You cut it?” Mark repeated, his focus on Mike forgotten as he stared Chester down. “Why?” His eyes were searching, scanning over the shaved head where the well-known and very well-loved red-tipped mohawk used to be. “Chaz, I. . .Chester,” he said a littler sterner, “Charlie Bang doesn’t have a shaved head. Charlie Bang has a red mohawk. Did something happen to it?” Mark knew exactly how the couple’s night had gone. He’d followed them from the restaurant to the ferry, and there had been no traumatic events. No accidents that would equal Chester’s need to cut off his beloved mohawk. _Unless something happened after they were back here. . ._ He was still trying to come up with scenarios as to why Chester would do such a thing, the most popular being that Mike forced him to do it, as he reached out to touch Chester’s head. 

“I know,” Chester agreed. He flinched the moment he saw Mark’s hand coming toward his face, but he recovered quickly when his boss flipped his palm over and carefully curled his fingers around the back of Chester’s head then over the top. “I’m sorry about Charlie Bang,” Chester mumbled as his insides ran cold. He hated Mark touching him, but this was business. He had to look a certain way and he knew his boss would have to make this work, since he couldn’t glue his mohawk back on. 

The sight of Mark’s hand on Chester’s head boiled Mike’s blood. He moved to stand up, his hand clutching the sheets around his waist, but he only got one leg over the side of the bed, his one foot on the floor, before he reconsidered. He didn’t feel like confronting Mark in such a vulnerable state. “It’s fine. Surely people have changed their hair here before,” he said, pulling his eyes away from Mark’s hand to watch Chester’s face. He could see the tell-tale signs of his boyfriend shutting down right in front of him. The lowered eyes and the sagging shoulders, the way that Chester looked seconds away from following just about any command, it all screamed submission. That he had given up fighting Mark a long time ago. “It’s not a big deal,” he said again, this time a little stronger. 

Mark brought his fingers down off of Chester’s head, sliding them down the side of his face and around to his chin, lifting his gaze up. “Don’t do this again,” he whispered to him. He glanced over at the bed before he took a side step, blocking Mike’s view. “Do you hear me? We’ll work it in this time, but I don’t want to have to have this conversation with you ever again.” He tugged on Chester’s chin before he let him go and stepped back. There was no need to give Chester a chance to agree or argue. Mark already knew he’d won. 

“And yes,” he said, eyeing Mike as he stepped closer to the bed. “Hairstyles change. But usually we work up to that or we wait until a series is finished. This is going to be awkward with what the two of you are in the middle of,” he stated, snapping his hand back toward Chester as he rounded the bed to get closer to Mike. “Was it your idea?” he asked, his hands going to the hips of his gray Dockers where his white dress shirt was neatly tucked in. 

“I didn’t even know he was going to do it!” Mike blurted out before he mentally kicked himself. It had always been important to him that he and Chester were a united front against Mark, but something had made him immediately deflect the blame for Chester’s decision. His eyes snapped to his boyfriend, but he was studying the ground. 

Mark tilted his head. “Oh. I see,” he said, softly. A partial smile slid across his lips as he eyed Mike’s bare shoulders, and the clean skin connecting them to his neck. Mike’s body was soft and tender, or at least that’s how it looked. Mark felt his fingers twitch against the Italian leather of his belt as he stood, his fixation on the blank canvas in front of him that he’d never dared to touch, drawing him forward a step, and then another before he felt his foot fall on something. He hissed as a sharp jab went into the bottom of his argyle sock. 

He picked his foot up, and the black collar with the shiny silver spikes was now the only thing he could see. He bent to scoop it up. “What’s this?” 

Mike froze as his boss held up the accessory belonging to the only fetish he and Chester had discovered he had. Their favorite sexual secret. The collar looked foreign in Mark’s hand. “That’s… ours,” Mike croaked, his throat suddenly dry. The fear that Mark would force it into one of their shoots crashed across his mind instantly. He held out his hand, reaching to take it back. “It shouldn’t have been on the floor.” 

Chester watched from the door as Mark held the collar up, out of Mike’s reach. He could feel everything inside his stomach curdling as he glanced out in the hallway and then he closed the door. He went to the other side of the bed, a safe distance from Mark’s temper. “Come on, Mark,” Chester said, trying to keep his voice as calm as he could, “just give it back, alright? Please,” he added, even though he had wanted to sound strong. 

Mark looked over, and he was surprised to see that Chester had moved. He glanced back at the door and was almost shocked that it was closed. “Well,” he said, dangling the collar in the air, “guess I found something you’re both passionate about. Tell me, which one of you wears this little black beauty?” 

There was a long pause as Mark waited the couple out, and Mike watched his eyes shift back and forth, waiting to see if it would be him or Chester who broke first. Mike turned his head to look at Chester, and he could see the small amount of defiance he’d managed to throw at Mark dissolving. “It doesn’t matter,” Mike finally answered. “But it’s ours, and we want it back.” 

“That’s right,” Chester chimed in, his heart racing. “Don’t be an asshole, Mark.” 

Chester’s words rang through the room, and Mark’s teasing smile dropped to a glare. “I see someone is extra pissy this morning,” he said, balling the collar up. “It must be that new haircut of yours, Chazzy. It’s given you an acid tongue. You should go wash your mouth out.” He held the collar up in his fist before he stuffed it into the pocket of his Dockers. “I think I’ll hang onto it for now.” He gave a fleeting glance to Mike before he headed for the door. “And don’t think that all this is going to get you out of work today, Chaz. You’re going to have to cover that bald head up, at least for one more scene since we’re in the middle of a storyline.” He paused when he got to the door and turned around, his gray eyes eating through Chester’s resolve. “And don’t you _ever_ call me an asshole again.” 

He turned on his heel, flung the door open and stomped out into the hallway, screaming over his shoulder that they needed to come down to breakfast _now_. 

Chester’s mouth dropped open, all the air escaping his lungs at once as he stumbled backwards a step. “What did I just do?” he asked as he looked over at Mike. “I’m sorry. Fuck, I’m sorry! He took it because I mouthed off to him.” He pointed toward the open door with a shaky finger. 

Mike stood up, the blankets falling to the bed, and grabbed his pajama pants from the bedside table where Chester had left them the night before. “I don’t know!” Mike hissed, his eyes wide in a panic. “We have to get that back from him!” He started toward the open door, but stopped and turned around, waving Chester over to him. “Ches? Come on!” 

Chester shook his head. “Mike, he took it.” He knew he’d just stated the obvious, but he also knew his lover wasn’t always quick to understand how things worked with Mark. “He, he has it until he gives it b-back,” he stuttered, rubbing his hand over the back of his head. “If we go after him, he’ll. . .” Chester dropped his head. “We’ll just have to wait it out.”

“Wait it out? But, Ches!” Mike took two steps back toward Chester. “It’s, it’s ours! And…” His eyes went over the top of Chester’s head and he could feel the frustrated tears pricking his eyes. “He can’t just take it, he can’t just do whatever he wants all the time.” He looked back over at the door and then at Chester again. “We bought that together. For you. It’s yours.” 

For a moment, Chester debated utilizing the one way he knew would work. He could go to Mark, lay on some charm and bat his eyes, tell him how sorry he was for calling him an asshole and cutting his hair. He could flatter Mark with ego-boosting compliments, and maybe - maybe - even offer a squeeze to Mark’s shoulder or hand. Maybe a kiss to his cheek. Maybe. . .maybe that would be enough for him to get Mark to give it back. _But I don’t want to do any of that. He really is an asshole. I don’t want to touch him or let him touch me._

He finally looked his boyfriend in the eyes and let out a long breath. “He’ll give it back,” he assured him. “He’s just pissed at me and he’s a fuckin’ child, so he’s taking it out on the collar.” He flipped his hand through the air. “Mark’s not into that kind of thing. . .not really.” 

Mike narrowed his eyes. It was on the tip of his tongue to say something hateful, but he bit it back. Nothing he could say right now would get the collar back, and it would only end up hurting Chester’s feelings. “Fine.” He scratched the top of his head with the nails of both hands and let out a long breath. “I fucking hate him. I hate everything about him and YRS and everything we have to do, everything we’re bound to by those contracts. I hate that we don’t have a choice but to go downstairs and act like nothing’s wrong and eat breakfast when I don’t feel like talking to anyone. I hate that they’re all going to watch us later, Ches.” He looked up and caught Chester’s eyes. He was close to suggesting again that they take Mark up on his ‘real series’ deal.

“I know,” Chester agreed, his shoulders slumping a little before he shook it away. Complaining wasn’t going to help anything. It was time to play the part. It was time to earn their paychecks, and that’s what Chester shifted to the front of his mind. He walked over to the closet to pick out something other than pajamas to wear down to breakfast. “I’m not a fan of everyone watching us live and in person either,” he said over his shoulder. “But that’s how location shoots go. We’re all here together, and it’s just. . .” He stopped, his lips pursing together as he stared at his minimal amount of clothes hanging in front of him. _Why do they watch? They don’t have to. I’ve done it, too. Every time we go somewhere as a group, I’ve always stood around and watched. Why?_ The thought was paralyzing as his visioned blurred a little, all the colors of his shirts melting into one. 

Mike scooped his shirt up from the floor and dragged it down over his head. “I’ll be back. I’m going to the bathroom. Don’t go downstairs without me,” he added, his voice giving away his worry. “I’ll be quick.” He didn’t want to know what the end of that sentence was. He had no interest in seeing anyone else’s shoots, and the blatant curiosity of the others irritated him. 

Chester heard the bedroom door click shut, and it was enough to bring him out of his trance. He looked behind him, his boyfriend nowhere to be seen. He rubbed his forehead. _I’ve got to stop spacing out like that._ He dropped his hand to his chest, his heart beating quickly, like he was in some sort of desperate panic, despite the lack of danger. He was picking out an outfit, not running from a tiger. 

He groaned at himself before he reached in and grabbed a white pullover shirt that had long sleeves and a v-neck collar. He headed to his suitcase next, fishing out jeans and his black and white striped beanie. Before Mike had even made it back from the bathroom, Chester had swapped his pajamas for his new outfit. He was already pulling on a pair of sneakers as he sat on the edge of the bed. 

Mike stopped in the doorway on his way back from the bathroom, looking over his boyfriend as he finished with his shoes. _Of course he’s going to get dressed. I don’t even see the point. We’re shooting right after breakfast. I’ll just get dressed afterwards._ He couldn’t help but smile as Chester looked up, his freshly shaved head making him look younger to Mike. “Come on, babe. Let’s go see what Brad’s got for us this morning.” It wouldn’t help to be in a sour mood, so he was just going to have to let the scene with Mark go. 

Downstairs, Brad already had his hungry troops at the table. Or, at least most of them. Unlike at home, here he could see right from the kitchen to the long table that was just on the other side of the bar. He scanned over each face, noting that Mike and Chester were still missing, and Jason had yet to make an appearance either. Mark was pacing, and sipping on a morning cocktail as he texted on his phone using only his thumb. 

Brad opened the waffle maker to pull out the last of his massive batch of blueberry waffles. He had stacks of them already on two platters, and now he could finally get all the hungry bellies served. He’d already made sure everyone had a glass of water and another of orange juice with a little vodka mixed in per Mark’s instructions. 

Brad unplugged the waffle maker before he picked up the first platter and headed for the table. Plates were already set out, so now it was just a matter of serving. “Oh darn,” the chef said as he started to hand out waffles, “I forgot the bottles of syrup. Ryan? Would you mind getting them? They’re on the island.” He knew if he asked, Ryan would do it. He was usually quick to please when it came to food or even just helping in general. _He loves to help Jason, too. With everything. Where is that cousin-in-law of mine?_ Brad glanced toward the hallway of the master bedroom, but he couldn’t see anything.

Ryan was up on his feet before Brad had barely gotten the request from his mouth. He rounded the bar, and spotted the two large bottles of syrup - one maple and one blueberry. “Blueberry on blueberry. My favorite,” he mumbled to himself with a lick of his lips. The plus to helping out was that he got first dibs on the syrup, everyone else would have to wait. 

Jason took one last look in the bathroom mirror before he flipped off the light switch and squared his shoulders. It was time to put memories from last night away and get to work. He didn’t feel like facing Mark, but it couldn’t be avoided after spending the entire second half of the day in bed a few nights ago. It had actually surprised him that Mark had taken off without him the night before, and he’d been thrilled to be in bed, feigning sleep, when Mark got home. It had been convenient, and Jason was grateful for the break from pretending everything was fine between him and his husband, but like most good things, he knew it couldn’t last. 

He could hear the chatter in the kitchen and smell waffles in the air, a scent that got closer as he walked down the hallway to the dining area. Mark’s back was to him, and he slipped around his husband’s side without an acknowledgement to sit down, taking his glass of water immediately and downing half of it in one gulp. He could see Ryan from the corner of his eye as his lover sat down several seats away, a bottle of syrup in his hand. 

Ryan had carefully watched Jason enter the room. He knew he wasn’t allowed to stare, or even to say ‘hi’ or ‘good morning’. Either would come off as suspicious, and Ryan was hyper aware this morning of how dangerously reckless the two of them had been the last few nights. First there’s was Jason’s ‘headache’ and then the night out on the town last night. It had all been so much fun, but now it was back to work and back to reality, and that meant keeping his eyes to himself and pretending like Jason was just another boss, another person to take orders from.

Chester was already rubbing his stomach as he and Mike walked down the stairs. He’d smelled the waffles the moment he’d stepped out in the hallway, his striped beanie pulled down over his head and his hand latched onto his lover’s. “We need to hurry,” he begged as he pulled Mike to pick up his pace. “They’re all animals, Sexy Boy, they’ll eat everything before we even get there!” He was half tempted to tell Mike he was on his own and make a mad dash for the quickly disappearing plate of blueberry waffles, but he didn’t. _The old Chester would have abandoned him for food. . .but I’m a good boyfriend,_ he decided, and he could only hope his moral high ground would award him with more than a broken piece of waffle and no syrup. 

Mike nodded, his stomach in agreement with picking up the pace. He loved eating almost as much as he loved Chester, and even if he had to endure Mark and the others, he wasn’t going to miss a meal. “It smells good, Ches,” he said, taking a deep whiff of blueberry scented air. “But I think that’s it. Just waffles.” He knew there was a tone of disappointment to his voice, but he couldn’t expect bacon _every_ morning. 

“And syrup,” Chester was quick to say. “It’s practically its own food group.” Their feet hit the floor, and Chester let go of Mike’s hand to round the table and grab a seat. He was relieved to see that Brad had already put two waffles each on their plates - big, plump waffles with real blueberries peeking out from the honeycomb shaped crevices. 

“Brad, these look amazing,” Mike chirped, looking at his waffles. Both bottles of syrup were currently in use, but he knew he wouldn’t have to wait too long. He wasn’t like Chester, worried that there wouldn’t be enough syrup. A nice criss-cross of the sticky, sugary liquid was enough for him. He picked up his glass of orange juice but quickly put it back down as soon as he tasted the alcohol. He made a face at Chester, but his boyfriend only had eyes for the syrup.

Brad smiled Mike’s way, always appreciating the compliments. He scanned the table one last time; everyone was sitting and eating and accounted for, everyone but his cousin. He’d made sure to put three waffles on Mark’s plate, but his chair was still empty, the boss walking off toward the living room before rounding back by the table. “Mark?” Brad called, “are you going to eat?” 

Mark looked up from where he’d been reading on his phone. He was almost surprised to see all the seats full. “Guess it’s that time,” he said, stuffing his cell phone into the pocket of his dress pants. He took his seat, his eyes bouncing from face to face, until he got to Ryan. His eyes narrowed as he watched him eat, as he stuffed drippy bits of waffle into his mouth and jovially knocked his elbow into Chester while they gushed over the potency of the syrup. _What does Jason see in him? He’s so. . .uncultured. He’s the picture perfect fuck boy. He’s. . ._ Mark’s teeth grit a little. Everything he’d seen while following his husband and the others around the night before had made him think that Jason and Ryan had entered into a romantic relationship. But maybe not. Maybe his husband was simply having fun, at Mark’s expense. 

“I love this stuff,” Chester was swooning as he pushed a piece of waffle through the river of syrup on his plate. “The only reason to even eat waffles is for the syrup.” He licked his lips, the sugar hitting his system instantly like he’d shot it right into his veins with a needle. 

“God, it’s just like you two with the ketchup last night,” Mike said without thinking as he drizzled a delicate line of syrup back and forth over his waffles. He didn’t even realize what he said until he looked up and caught Ryan’s eyes on him. He bit down on his bottom lip and tried to ignore the uncomfortable feeling in the air. 

Ryan’s mind was stunned. He wanted to look to Jason for help - for reassurance - but he knew he would be a dead man if he did. Instead, he swallowed down his bite of waffle and smiled briefly. “I like ketchup,” he mumbled before he dropped his eyes to his plate, hoping no one had noticed, no one was paying attention. But he didn’t dare look up to see. Instead he concentrated on his food, wishing for something to happen. Maybe a phone would ring or Brad would catch something on fire in the kitchen or Amir would find something to complain about. 

Mark was just rolling up the sleeves of his dress shirt when the comment had escaped Mike’s mouth, and it had turned his head immediately. Now he could see it, the stiff awkwardness that was hovering over the four of them. _All of them. Jason, Ryan, Mike. . .even Chaz._ “I’m not much of a ketchup fan,” he said, picking up his fork and a knife to properly slice his stack of waffles, “so I guess I should count myself lucky that I was not here for dinner. Tell me, Ryan, what was so wonderful on the menu last night that you had to use so much ketchup for?” 

Ryan was frozen. He could feel himself starting to sweat, and he thanked God that he was wearing a tank top so it wouldn’t show. He allowed himself to look toward Mike and Chester, but they were no help. Ryan had no idea what was served by their personal chef for dinner, and he was pretty sure the only people who could help him out of this didn’t know either. 

“Fries,” Amir supplied helpfully around a mouthful of waffle. “Those two are idiots for fries and ketchup. Dipping them like a normal human being isn’t good enough. They pour it all over the top of the fries and get ketchup all over every damn thing.” He rolled his eyes and poked another forkful of waffle in his mouth before Mark could ask him a question. 

The table went quiet with only the sound of chewing and utensils hitting plates as the backdrop. Mark watched as Ryan nodded in agreement with Amir’s comment, but then his eyes were back on his food. “French fries,” Mark said, shifting his gaze from Ryan to Jason. “That doesn’t seem like a full meal and I know my cousin. He never would have let you all go hungry. Jason? What else did you guys have last night? I can’t have Brad getting slack.” He’d already seen Brad step away, excusing himself to his room. There would be no hurt feelings or frantic answers from the chef. 

“Oh, Brad’s fine,” Jason said, lifting his eyes to meet Mark’s straight on, “how funny you’d think he’d only serve us fries. It was burger night.” Jason kept steady eye contact with his husband as he lied and hoped for the best. He was pretty sure there weren’t fries or hamburgers on the menu last night, but he was also certain none of the boys would dare to disagree with him. They weren’t stupid. The only wild card was Brad, and Jason had to make sure that someone got to him before Mark did. 

“They were really good, too,” Devon offered, catching Mark’s attention for a split second. “Juicy and cheesy.” He’d wanted to help, since he’d been around long enough to know how things worked. Besides, Mark getting upset at anyone usually equalled a bad day for all of them, so it was in everyone’s best interest to stick together. He glanced to his right, and he didn’t miss the confused look on Noah’s face. He kicked the redhead under the table, and tried to give him a nonchalant _just go with it_ look.

“I see,” Mark muttered before he took his fork and stabbed a bite of waffle. “So Ryan,” he said, and he paused long enough to see the deer in the headlights stare from his employee, “tell me about this boyfriend of yours.”

Mike dropped his fork as soon as the words came out of Mark’s mouth, his eyes wide as it clattered to the tabletop. He felt all eyes turn to him for a second and he mumbled, “sorry.” It was remarkable how quickly his feeling of relief at having escaped the dinner questions turned right back into a fear of what might be coming next. It was hard to know what Mark knew all the time, and even though they’d all managed to deflect suspicion after he’d mentioned ketchup, he had no idea what was happening with Mark asking Ryan about his boyfriend. A sick feeling washed over him as he kept his eyes on his plate, afraid to even look at Chester. _Here we go. It’s all going to come out right here at the breakfast table, and we’re all screwed._

Ryan’s mind was already on overdrive. He knew he had a fake boyfriend. Amir had called him the night Mark had dragged him and Chester to the club, and had told him all about. . . _What was his name? What was it? Jay. . .something. It was like Jason. It was, it was,_ “He’s fine,” Ryan blurted out. He knew he had to say something, and maybe he could buy some time to remember the elusive name. He cleared his throat and tugged at the super loose collar of his gray tank top. “He misses me, of course.” 

Several seats away, Jason sat perfectly still for a moment. _Boyfriend? What the fuck is Mark talking about? Ryan doesn’t have anyone but me. I know he doesn’t. But if Mark knows about us, this wouldn’t be the way he’d confront it._ He forced himself to pick up his orange juice and take a sip, then turned to look at Ryan. He could see the discomfort in his body language, and was suddenly struck with the thought that maybe, maybe he wasn’t the only one in Ryan’s life. _It would serve me right. I can’t give him everything he deserves, so why wouldn’t he be looking elsewhere. He doesn’t believe I’ll ever truly leave._

Jason made an attempt at a smile, turning to face Ryan. “Hopefully it doesn’t start interfering with your work. I don’t know if we can handle anymore relationships around here.” His eyes drifted over to Mike and Chester, who also looked uncomfortable. _They know something. I can’t believe it. I won’t._ He lifted his chin and looked right at his lover, waiting to hear what he had to say. 

Ryan had abandoned his plate. He was fidgeting with his fingers, the watch on his wrist. He still couldn’t quite place the name he’d been told only once a few nights ago, and he didn’t dare guess. He leaned forward so he could see Jason better, trying to get a read on his face. _Surely he knows. Chaz would have told him. . .wouldn’t he? I should have said something to him, but I forgot. A lot has been happening. Fuck. No. No, Jay, it’s not a real boyfriend. It’s not!_ He begged from his mind for a few more seconds, hoping somehow the message would get across to his lover. “You don’t have to worry,” he said, right to Jason. “My heart belongs here.” A quick smile flashed across his lips - an action he couldn’t stop. 

“Glad to hear it,” Jason responded, still a little unsure what was going on. _I know him. I know he’s not cheating on me. So what is Mark talking about?_ He felt his heart skip a beat as the only other explanation sunk into his thoughts. _He knows about us. Somehow, he knows._ He didn’t dare look at Mark. Instead he focused his eyes on his drink, his body on high alert in the event he needed to say something else to deflect suspicion. 

Mark’s gray eyes shifted from Ryan to Jason and back. His grip on his fork tightened. _This is just annoying. And there’s too many damn people around to protect them. I’ll have to get Ryan alone. Make him sweat. I still can’t believe he’s got the nerve to be doing all this right under my nose. Somehow he’s filled Jason’s head with ideas or promises. Jason’s smarter than that._ He glowered at his husband for a second before he switched his deadeye stare to Chester. His eyes narrowed. “Chaz,” he barked roughly, “take that hat off while we eat. You know the rules.” 

Chester had jumped at the sound of his own name, his heart pounding in that instant as he looked up at his boss. He’d been very happy about being left out of the conversation, even though he felt bad for Ryan. If he could have jumped in and helped, he would have, but Mark would have shut him down. He raised a hand to the black and white striped beanie, but hesitated. 

“I said, take it off,” Mark ordered, his bark becoming a growl. “Go on. Show everyone what you’ve done to yourself.” 

Amir perked up from his seat across from Chester. “Ooh, Chazzy, have you been bad? Did you dye your mohawk to match Mike’s hair or something?” He pointed his fork at Chester and narrowed his eyes. “Or maybe something worse? Green? Orange? I have a thing for orange tips, you know.” 

Chester didn’t even look up. It wasn’t funny, and even though he didn’t dislike what he’d done to himself, not really, he knew there would be questions. Speculations. And worst of all, judgement. His love for his mohawk and the strong fanbase that adored it too, was well-known around the YRS camp. Chester let out a short breath before he pulled the beanie off, his eyes shutting for just a moment before he looked up to see everyone staring at him. 

Mike reached over and took Chester’s hand, lacing their fingers together and holding on tightly. “I think it looks good, Ches,” he offered, knowing that his boyfriend was hating every second of Mark’s wrath being turned on him. 

“I still can’t believe it,” Mark grumbled, his piercing stare blazing into the shape of Chester’s head, and how his ears stuck out. Without the bright red-tipped mohawk to draw your attention, other features stood out more now - his ears and the curve of his skull that wasn’t quite symmetrical. “And it doesn’t really matter what _you_ think,” Mark added with a huff toward Mike. “Hopefully the fans will accept. . .this.” He rolled his hand toward Chester. “I can already guarantee that your ratings will go down, Chaz. It will take people time to get used to it.” He curled his lip, ready to say more, to finish tearing Chester down to make a point to the others, but he stopped himself. The business part of him recalled what time it was, and the shooting schedule. If he wanted to get a good scene out of Chester, he couldn’t completely stomp him to the ground. 

Mark left his plate on the table as he stood up. “Everyone finish up,” he instructed as he looked at his watch and unrolled his sleeves. “I want to get a jump on things this morning.” He looked around at the boys, all of them sitting like sad statues. He was pretty sure not a one of them was actually eating in that moment. Except for Amir, but even he seemed to be chewing his bite extra slow. 

Mark headed off toward the bedroom, ready to look over paperwork and check his phone. He had a call to make before it got too late in the day and he wanted some privacy for it, so now was a good time since his husband wasn’t getting up to follow him. 

“ _Fuck._ What was all of that about?” Jason huffed, looking toward the hallway Mark had just disappeared down. “Chaz? Your hair? I mean, it was all there when we…” He paused, looking around the table. Everyone had their eyes on Chester, whose head was bowed over his plate. “Never mind.” He pushed his chair back and stood up, knowing he was visibly frustrated, but unable to hide it any longer. 

Ryan watched as Jason stood up, as he put his hands on his hips and took deep breaths. He wanted to stand up with him, and put a hand on his shoulder, but he didn’t. He couldn’t, at least not now. Whatever reassuring words he could say to his lover would have to wait. Instead he looked back at Chester, who hadn’t moved since he’d uncovered his head. Ryan reached over, squeezing Chester’s upper arm gently. “What happened?” he whispered. “Chaz, you could have come and talked to me. . .you didn’t have to do this.” 

Chester looked over, his eyes still lidded. “It was late,” he answered simply before pressing his fingers over his skull. _Mark’s right. Everyone will hate it. And when our numbers go down, I, I don’t know what he’ll do._

Mike looked up at Ryan. “It’s fine. It’s not like Mark owns the rights to his hairstyle. I don’t see why this is such a big deal.” He found himself defending Chester’s decision to cut off his hair when a half hour ago he’d been asking the same questions, but he didn’t like the way everyone was reacting, as though it were the crime of the century. “Ches, you can do whatever you want with your hair, babe. I think it’s cute and fuzzy.” He was trying to get Chester to look over at him and smile.

Chester let out a sigh before he gave his boyfriend what he wanted. He looked his way, ready to force a happy face, but he didn’t have to. The moment he saw the look on Mike’s face, the kind gesture in his eyes and the warm squeeze of his hand, Chester smiled for real. “Thanks,” he answered softly before he picked up his orange juice and took a sip. “And I’m fine,” he told Ryan next. “I just needed a change.” That wasn’t completely a lie. “I didn’t mean to piss Mark off, just bad timing.” He took another sip, enjoying the punch of the tart orange juice against all the sweet syrup he’d been downing in. 

“Come on, babe. Let’s go sit on the couch until they’re ready for us,” Mike suggested, wanting to get away from the others for a few minutes. It seemed like Chester really needed some time to refocus before they had to work. He wanted to save him from any more unsolicited questions about his lack of hair. 

Jason watched Chester nod and stand up, following Mike into the living area adjacent to the kitchen. Ryan was facing him, with Devon, Caleb, Noah, and Amir still at the table, keeping them from being alone. He wanted a private moment with Ryan before work got started and the day slipped away from them. In his heart, he knew whatever Mark had been playing at wasn’t true, but he needed to hear it from Ryan. He needed that reassurance, and he had no idea how to get Ryan alone long enough to talk to him.

He caught Ryan’s gaze, and a little bit of the fear he’d been feeling dissolved just from the soft look in his eyes. _I know it’s not true. But I need to hear him say it. No matter how dangerous it is to be alone right now._ Jason cleared his throat. “Ryan? I’d like to talk with you for a minute before we start shooting. Can you follow me?” he asked formally, even though three of the employees at the table knew exactly what was going on. His firm boss-like exterior was for Noah’s benefit, and for a second he felt like telling Amir to just go ahead and clue the new kid in to his relationship with Ryan. 

Despite the amazing blueberry waffles still on his plate, Ryan was on his feet. “Sure, boss,” he said, knowing he needed to follow suit. He watched as Jason nodded at him before heading toward the stairs, and Ryan was quick to follow. He knew his lover was upset, probably about all the boyfriend talk and probably even a little about Chester’s impromptu haircut. Ryan only had answers for one of those things. 

He followed closely behind Jason, resisting the urge to reach for him - his hand, his ass, his hip - whatever he could touch. He wanted to pull him into his arms and reassure him that there was no boyfriend, and that he only had eyes for one person. He glanced over his shoulder as they went, but Noah was watching their every move as they made their way up the open staircase. 

Jason moved with purpose down the upstairs hallway to the room Ryan was sharing with Amir, ducking inside and spinning around to face his lover as soon as he stepped in the room. “What was all of that about?” he asked, his voice low and strained. “Boyfriend? Ry… tell me what he’s talking about,” Jason pleaded, his stomach feeling sick. 

“Jay, it’s nothing,” he said, before he glanced over his shoulder into the empty hallway. He turned back, and took Jason’s hand, squeezing it. “It’s a lie that Chaz and Amir told Mark while they were at the club. He was asking questions, and that was their diversion. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you,” he said before he took a breath to slow down. “I love you. Just you,” he promised, tugging on Jason’s hand to see if he would step closer. 

“Asking questions?” Jason repeated. “About you? Oh my god, Ry, what if he knows? He was on everyone’s ass this morning. About the dinner last night, like he knew we weren’t here. How would he know? He was _gone_!” he adding, feeling seconds from an emotional breakdown. He wanted leaving to be on his terms. He wasn’t ready. There were plans to make, and a lawyer, and none of it would go right if Mark already knew what was going on between them. 

Ryan shook his head. He wasn’t used to seeing Jason panic. There’d been occasions, but they were few and far between. “I don’t know what he was asking exactly, but, I. . .” He stopped, his gaze going over Jason’s shoulder at the two beds that occupied the room. “He can’t know about last night. He was already gone, like you said,” he decided as he looked back at Jason’s stressed features. His mouth was open, his eyes twitching, his free hand shoving his dark hair from his face. “Jay, Jay it’s okay,” he assured him, and he took the step forward to bring them together. He let go of his boyfriend’s hand, to wrap his arms around him instead, practically swallowing him. “He’s just fishing. You know how he is. . .he likes to stir up trouble. He doesn’t know. He can’t know.” He pressed a kiss to Jason’s head, forcing his voice to stay steady and calm. 

Jason leaned into Ryan, wrapping his arms tightly around him. “Ry, we’d be so fucked if he found out. We’ve got to be more careful.” He shivered even with Ryan’s body heat pressed against him. The thought of what Mark could do to make them miserable, of the things he was capable of, was enough to put Jason on the edge of being sick. “I knew there wasn’t anyone else, but I needed to hear you say it. I’m sorry.” He grazed his lips over the soft skin of his lover’s neck as he worked his way around to connect their lips. Kissing Ryan made his uneasiness feel far away. He put everything he had into that one kiss, trying to convey the strength of his feelings as the kiss went longer, wetter, deeper. Ryan was the whole world, and Jason was terrified that they were getting sloppy and Mark might soon discover them - if he hadn’t already. 

****  
TBC


End file.
